All the Words
by SciFiRN
Summary: At one point we were left with Nico and Dani on the porch and my imagination was really not happy with that, but then life is complicated isn't it? And well, so are these two. This may have started on the porch, but that isn't where this ends. My story takes a turn and the characters end up somewhere they never would in the TV show, unless this was HBO. M: for many reasons.
1. So, This is How it Goes

_**So, This is How it Goes**_

She had no clue why she was crying about the dead fish. Okay, it really wasn't about Mr. Fish and she knew it. She knew what to label it and how to classify it. She knew exactly what was going on and understood that really it was about everything else. It was about losing Matt and her kids growing up. It was about the taxes, her divorce and Pittman. It was about her best friend leaving her alone again and if she were honest with herself in the way she would want her clients to be, she would have to admit to being the tiniest bit jealous that Jeanette was happily in love with her Spaniard, while she was stuck sitting on the porch crying over the dead, slightly smelly fish.

"Dani"

His deep voice startled her, he tended to do that a lot so she should be used to it by now, but she wasn't. It wasn't just his voice. It was his presence; there was just something about Nico that made her more aware of everything.

"The package from Marshall…it was for you."

She looked up at him, knowing her makeup was ruined and her eyes were swollen. "The tapes?" Her voice was scratchy and hoarse, a bit more than usual and the fish bowl was still on her lap. It sloshed a bit and she watched Nico take notice as he sat beside her.

"Yeahh," he inclined his head, finally noticing the fish floating in the bowl. "You lost a friend…."

She watched emotion cross his face, an odd flicker she didn't quite catch.

He looked away and leaned forward on his knees a bit. His voice dropped, quieter; solemn and a bit shaky, "I did too. They found his body."

His words pushed her into action. She slid forward and quickly placed the bowl on the porch before reaching for him. Instinctively she pulled him into a hug. She wanted to share his pain, share her pain. It was too much. All of it, was just too much for one week, hell maybe even one yeahr. She cried into his shoulder and her hand found its way into his hair.

"He was the only one who knew me other than you."

Nico's voice was quiet.

Dani pulled back. "I don't know you." She searched his eyes. She meant it, she didn't know this man. Even though he did occasionally reveal a bit of himself, he was a stranger to her. A wonderful, dangerous, charismatic and sexy stranger who made her feel things she tried not to feel. He challenged her and sometimes she didn't like it.

He didn't look away. "You do." His hand was on her shoulder and he titled his face toward hers. He didn't push further, he just waited.

Her hand slid to his shoulder then jaw as she watched his face and tried to decide if this is what she wanted. She mirrored Nico's movement and leaned in until her mouth was a breath from his. Her hand slid to his neck, she slid closer and then they were kissing.

Nico's lips were soft and firm and even though he let her lead she knew he was completely in control. It reminded Dani of the way he often handled people; let them think they were in control. Then his teeth grazed her bottom lip, followed by his tongue and she stopped thinking altogether.

His arm slid behind her and he pulled her closer, deepening the kiss more as his hand slid into her hair. His hand tangled and he pulled back. "Dani…" He kissed her temple and forehead. "Look at me Dani." He waited until the passion started to clear from her eyes, but he couldn't keep his thumb from brushing across her cheek bone and the corner of her now swollen lips. He shook his head. "Damn it, stop looking so fuckable."

She pouted and pulled away. "Don't be so crude." Her voice was quiet and not quite angry, more like shocked. She shoved his hand away. "What's wrong with you?" She couldn't quite keep the tears from her eyes as she stood, this time gripping the box of tapes in front of her like armor. "Go. Get off my porch and go. I'm sorry about Marshall, but you need to leave."

Nico stood up and, ignoring her, followed Dani toward the door. "Dani…" his mouth lifted in a wry smile. "I wasn't trying to insult you, I'm sorry." He watched her face and frowned. "I didn't want to make you cry."

"I was crying when you got here." She wiped her face and when she did the box slipped and the tapes spilled to the porch. She cursed and bent to start picking up the tapes, but only started crying harder.

Nico bent to help, grabbing most of the tapes before she had two or three in her hands. He put them in the box, took the box from Dani and slid his arm around her shoulder to pull her against him as he ushered her into the house.

"It's late. It's been a hell of a long day and we deserve a drink." He shut and locked the door behind them and moved into the kitchen. He put the box on the counter and released Dani as he turned to look at her. "So, where do you hide the good stuff?"

She stood there watching him and shook her head before moving toward the liquor cabinet. "Why'd you do that?" She pulled out a bottle of scotch, something expensive a client had given to her ex-husband.

"What?" He took the bottle when she held it to him and smiled as he read the label. "Nice."

"Stop me…us out on the porch and then intentionally rile me up?" She crossed her arms and kept her eyes on his face this time.

He returned her gaze and then set the bottle down. She watched as he moved toward her with his slow grace, pausing to take off his jacket and drape it over the chair by the table. His eyes never left hers. When he was finally beside her, he bent to rest his hands on the counter on either side of her, boxing her in. He bent so his mouth was by her ear and when he spoke his voice was low and seductive.

"Because when I finally get you in bed I don't want there to be any regrets and no reason for you to second guess why you're there."

His finger played over the sensitive skin of her midriff where her shirt had rode up and she felt him smile against her ear when she shivered.

"I don't want anything between us."

He leaned closer, knowing she couldn't help but feel how hard he was. "I want you there because you want me." He let his nose graze the curve of her ear and down her cheek. "Trust me when I say, I want you and I intend to have you more than once Dani."

She shivered and looked up knowing she looked like an idiot when she opened her mouth to say something and nothing came out. She wasn't sure if she was disappointed or grateful when he stepped away to resume his bartending. She cleared her throat, nodded and tried to steady her pulse. "I see…"

Nico chuckled. "I'm glad you do." He held up a glass. "Ice?"

He held the glass and waited for her answer and wondered why he was still here. He was just going to get hurt, but damn he hoped not. He knew she was still getting over Matt. He glanced over at Dani while he poured himself a glass of the amber liquor. She was so damn sexy it about killed him every time he thought about her. She wasn't just pretty, she was sexy in that way many women wish they could be, try to be and fail miserably at and she didn't even try; hell it was because she didn't try.

"Here."

Her small body was suddenly beside him as she plunked ice into an empty glass and then added some scotch. She took the bottle, her glass and the small ice bucket and motioned him into the living room. He followed, but not before grabbing an apple and knife from the counter.

She'd settled herself on the couch, her small feet tucked up under her and the bottle and ice on the table close by where she could reach it. He took the other end of the couch, swirled and sniffed his glass and then finally he sipped his drink with a sigh and a nod of approval.

"You drink scotch often?" He savored the flavor of the liquor and took another drink. "This is about two hundred dollars a bottle."

Dani, who had just taken a drink, almost spit. She covered her mouth and swallowed. "Two hundred…" She looked at the bottle and then at Nico. "For this crap that burns all the way down?"

Nico smiled. "Guess that's a no, then."

"I'll take a ten dollar bottle of vino any day. I mean, this is okay, but two hundred?"

He nodded and set his glass down. He cut the apple in half and then quickly the half into quarters. He handed two to Dani. "Try some apple with it." He watched her eat a slice and did the same. "Trust me it works together."

He finished his glass because he intended to feel something from the alcohol tonight and getting drunk on good liquor was always better. He added more to his glass and sat back in the center of the couch, closer to Dani with his glass in one hand and apple slices in the other. He ate one and held another to Dani, and again it hit him-why was he still here?"

"Hey, you're wandering off again."

"Hmm?"

"You're here, but you aren't. What's going on in your head?" She sat up and he noticed the concern on her face. "Are you alright Nico? I know Marshall meant a lot to you."

He sat back. His wall went up. "I'm not your client Dani."

"I'm not Dr. Santino right now Nico. We aren't in my office are we? I don't have the 'In Session' sign hanging on my door. So right now, I'm your friend and as your friend, the one you say knows you, I'm asking if you're alright."

Nico finished off the second glass of scotch. This time his thought was that he should be paying more attention to how good it was than just slamming it down like a two dollar shot. He set the glass on the table and turned to look at Dani. "He killed himself. " His voice was angry. "He crashed that damn plane on purpose."

"Oh my god." She grabbed his hand. "Are you sure?"

There was pain in his voice and on his face. He was hurting, but also relieved. "I was wrong earlier. Him paying off your debt…sending you the tapes and then his plane going down…He wasn't trying to disappear, he was tying up loose ends." Nico wiped a hand through his hair.

"Why didn't I see it, Nico?"

"Dani you weren't treating him and he tried before." He was hit by the distress on her face. "Don't beat yourself up over it." He took her glass from her hand and put it onto the table. "Look at me Dani." When she did he cupped her chin and wiped the tears from her cheeks. "If anyone should have seen this coming it should have been me."

Dani searched his face. "You did everything you could."

"I hurt him…betrayed him."

"He needed help, he knew it." She covered his hand with hers and pressed it to her cheek. "You did more than most people would."

He shook his head, but leaned closer. "Tell me something?"

"What?"

One of his hands had slid to jawline and played over it while the other eased down her opposite shoulder. "Tonight, would there be any regrets?" He tilted her chin and feathered a light kiss across her lips. "Would there be an excuse tomorrow?"

He felt her shiver and watched her eyes close. He knew she wanted him, but that wasn't enough for him.

She shook her head and even as close as he was he had to strain to hear her, "No."

He traced her lips with his tongue, barely there and when she responded he pulled back. "What was that Dani?

"No Nico, I said no." She slid her hand to the back of his head and pulled him close. "No excuses."


	2. No Excuses

_**NOTE: **_No beta, so all mistakes are my own and I apologize upfront. I work 60+ hrs as an NP, it's high stress, I am married and have 2 very busy teenagers, writing is my escape. I try to keep my writing as professional as I can, but hey, I'm not making a living at this so again…my escape (I wish I COULD make a living at this :D). Updates may not be frequent or lengthy (see sentence two), but right now I'm inspired in this fandom, so you guys are lucky, at least for the moment.

Thanks for the reviews! I appreciate them all, even if you have something you don't like. You can comment. I'm a big girl and we can agree to disagree. I still think Nico probably could have/would have said the rude thing he said Dani and I think Dani would have called him on it like she did, afterall she's a big girl with a big girl job dealing with people.

Nico, well he's had a hard life, he's a hard guy. He is NOT a prince charming. Yes, he cares for Dani, but he does use bad language will say bad things and honestly in my imagination has some appetites in the bedroom that may make some of you blush, run and hide. _Small hints in this chapter_…Feel free to comment or message me if you agree or disagree, you'd like to see more or maybe you have absolutely no idea what I'm talking about. If that's the case, then maybe my hints are lame.

Oh, and btw…I enjoy multi-chapter smut. Hope you do too.

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_**No Excuses…**_

Nico bit back a moan as he covered her mouth with his own and he tried to keep his passion in check. He'd fantasized about being with Dani. He'd wake from dreams, hot and thick with a picture of her still heavy in his mind, but the reality was so much more intense. She was vibrant and passionate and right now she tasted a combination of smoky earthiness from the scotch and the bright tartness of apples. Like a man starved, he wanted more.

He pulled her close, one hand in her hair and the other at her hip; he needed to feel her against him. His tongue teased over her lips and begged inside until their tongues met to tangle and play together. His teeth teased her lower lip, a short, sharp bite followed by the long, sensual glide of his tongue that soothed the small hurt.

She shivered and he couldn't help the way it stroked his ego. The hand on her hip eased up her side to her breast and he traced the curve with his thumb, purposely avoiding her sensitive nipple. She squirmed and canted her head to change the angle of the kiss and try to get him to touch her more intimately, but Nico kept his fingers to the edge of her breast and the he slid his hand up to her jaw as he pulled back to watch her eyes.

Dani groaned in frustration and pressed closer. "Nico…" her voice as breathless.

He chuckled and brushed her hair off her face before pressing a kiss to her forehead, jaw and then neck. His lips left a trail of fire as they moved. His fingers just ahead of his mouth teasing lightly, touching skin in a barely there caress before his lips landed in a seemingly random pattern: chin, neck, collarbone, shoulder, earlobe and then that sensitive place behind the ear.

"You're so sexy Danielle." He whispered in her ear as his fingers gently ran through her hair. "I love the way your hair feels on my skin." He bent and captured her lips again, slowly building the kiss back to where it had been before. A soft press of lips until it became a battle for dominance between them with teeth and tongues.

He shifted then, pulling Dani onto his lap so that she straddled him with one knee to each side of his hips and when she realized her position she smiled down at him and ground down against his length.

Nico groaned and his head fell back on the couch. His hands gripped Dani's hips. "Oh my…" She moved again but cut him off as she bent and kissed him with a giggle and groan of her own.

Dani was thrilled to finally be in a position with a bit of power. She slid her hips forward and savored the heat the slid through her. The thought flit through her conscious mind that she enjoyed this new power over sexy men since her divorce and she wondered where it had been all those years she was married. Nico's hand on her breast suddenly drove all rational thought from her again as his finger traced softly over her left nipple and she broke the kiss and arched into his hand with a gasp.

He was different that Matt, she couldn't help but compare, he was only the third man she had ever been with after all, his touch seemed more sure, but less calculated. She felt in a way he was exploring but still expectant of the outcome. Like a master musician who was playing a new instrument, he knew he could make beautiful music, but he needed to strum a few chords to get the melody right.

"You like that Dani?" Nico bent forward and pressed his mouth to Dani's breast, through her shirt. He gently bit at the nipple he'd been teasing.

"Oh god Nico, yes." Her eyes were glassy now and she realized he really did know what he was doing. He was playing her just like an instrument. He was warming her up bit by bit. She ran her hands into his hair.

"You're gorgeous." His hands eased down to her hips, skimming under the hem of her shirt. "I want to see you." He didn't push further, just traced his fingers along the sensitive skin along the curve of her hip. "Please."

She looked down at him. This dark and dangerous man asking permission and she was a bit shocked, but she nodded slowly.

"Show me Dani. Take your shirt off for me." His voice was a quiet order.

It sent a shiver of lust down her spine and she licked her suddenly dry lips and reached down, gripped her shirt and slowly pulled it up over her head. She dropped it to the floor and sat back on Nico's knees in her black, lace bra.

He drew in a sudden breath and saw her for the first time. The rosy peaks of her nipples pressed against the lace cups of her bra. "So damn beautiful," He reached out and traced each nipple with his index fingers, his eyes on hers the entire time. When her eyes drifted shut, he pinched her nipples lightly, "Keep your eyes open Danielle. Stay with me."

She moaned and felt her face and chest flush. "Nico…please." It was too much.

He bent and captured her lips in a devastating kiss that finally showed her truly who was in control. It wasn't harsh, or punishing, but it left both of them breathless. He pulled back and searched her face. "There is nothing to be embarrassed about, but I want to be with _you_ Dani. I need to know it's just you and me here right now, do you understand me?" He cradled her face gently with his hands. "If you can't give me that then I need to go." He kissed her gently this time, pressing kisses to her ear and then whispering. "Just us…me and you?" His voice pleaded softly, his lips soft against her skin, his breath teasing her hair and his fingers massaging lightly into her hairline. His eyes were desperate. "Please say yes Dani because I want you so damn much right now I'm not even sure I could walk away even if I have to."

Dani pulled back so she could see Nico's face. She nodded. "It's just us Nico." She took a deep breath and exhaled. She chose boldness to prove it and faking confidence she didn't quite feel she stood and held out her hand.

Nico took her hand and she led him up the stairs to her room. She sat him on the bed then while she kept her eyes on his she undid the zipper on her pants. She paused, trying to gauge his reaction.

He cocked his eyebrow at her, smiled in anxious relief and crossed his arms over his chest in challenge. He almost laughed when she unconsciously bit her lip.

She swallowed, took a step toward him, turned and then bent over as she skimmed her pants down her legs, ensuring that he got a nice view of her ass. She was suddenly happy she put on nice panties this morning. Before she turned around she undid her bra strap and when she did turn Nico had changed positions and he was sitting more upright with one hand resting on his thigh and the other lightly fisted at his side.

Dani, wet her lips, she couldn't help it because the man on her bed looked even more dangerous than she could ever remember seeing him. Maybe it was because the intensity on his face was completely directed at her and maybe it was because it looked like he was hungry and she was the buffet…and that thought sent wet heat right between her legs and her eyes drifted shut for a split second.

Nico moved suddenly. He was on the edge of the bed. Dani noticed as he adjusted himself in his trousers as he moved and she shivered again.

"What's in your head?" His fingers moved to the buttons on his shirt and he slid the uppermost one through the hole. "Tell me what made your eyes drift close and that look of pleasure overcome you Dani."

She realized she was almost mesmerized watching him undo his shirt and she shook her head, her hands still holding her bra to her breasts. She cleared her throat, "You looked so hungry…like a big, wild animal in my bedroom, getting ready to eat me alive." She knew she was blushing.

He stood now as he finished with the last button and pulled the hem of his shirt from his always black pants. He undid his cuffs and then the black, leather belt was next. The supple leather pulled easily from the loops and Dani watched as he handled it. For some reason it also made her shiver. He stood there, his shirt hanging open and the belt in his hands while she stood in front of him in her panties holding her bra up.

She gulped.

"Let it go Dani." He had folded the belt in half and held it in one hand. He traced the loop of leather up Dani's left arm. "I need to see you."

The cool leather was a stark contrast to her flushed skin and again he made her feel so vulnerable like prey to his predator. It was exhilarating and so different. She dropped her arms and the bra fell to the floor.

Nico stepped toward her and he dragged the edge of the leather over her nipples, dragging it slowly as her flesh pebbled and hardened, then he tossed the belt behind him to the bed and filled his palms with her heated flesh and crushed his mouth to hers.

Dani was relieved and overwhelmed at once. The sudden intense rush of sensation from the slightly sharp leather, then his work hardened, calloused hands and hot chest and mouth suddenly pressed to her, it took her breath from her and if it weren't for his solid strength she was pretty sure her legs would have buckled from under her. Swooned, like in a romance novel, she vaguely made a note of that term, but then Nico's mouth was moving south and she gave up thought for sensation altogether.

Nico angled her so that when he stepped forward she moved backward and then two steps and her knees hit the bed. He pushed lightly and pressed forward, one knee beside her hip as she went back on the bed, his mouth pressing kisses lower, feathering kisses across her collarbone and teeth scraping lightly and then soothed by his tongue.

Dani moaned and arched up under Nico. Her hands playing over his chest, teasing over the light layer of hair to grip his shoulders and then as his mouth found her right nipple she gasped his name and gripped his dark hair. "Please…mmm."

Nico's right hand roamed over her left breast as his teeth and tongue worked over her right, then he moved over the left to give it equal treatment. His hand free to roam lower.

Dani's hand's alternated between gripping Nico's hair and the comforter beneath her as she pressed her thighs together with need. She was so damn needy right now. She panted, looked down at the head at her breast and moaned at a particularly erotic trick he pulled off with his teeth and tongue and then threw her head back when the ache between her legs seemed to double over as he suckled and pulled back, his eyes catching hers with a dark, passionate intensity that shocked her to the core.

He smiled up from her breast, his fingers playing. "You're so lovely Dani, so hot blooded…" He pulled at her nipple and watched his hand as he traced it over her breast and down her belly, then watched her face when his fingers traced the waistband of her panties. She shivered and arched up under his hand as she spread her legs. He pressed the heel of his hand firmly between her legs and closed his eyes when he realized how wet she was. "So wet for me Dani…" he traced two fingers over her panties, rubbing her clit, her juices making the satin slick and wet making a delicious friction. "So damn sexy, so damn perfect." His eyes never left her face as he touched her. He continued to stroke her.

Dani was about to come out of her skin. Every inch of her was on fire. Nico's eyes were heavy on hers, his fingers were doing the most amazing things between her legs and now his other hand was teasing her nipples. And then his voice…she was about to fall apart. Her breathing was erratic, her pulse was pounding in her ears and her heels were dug into the bed. She moaned quiet and low and the urge to turn inward, close her eyes and shut everything out to let go was dragging her under.

"Dani, let me watch you let go." Nico's voice was in close, his eyes suddenly on hers. "Just us."

She nodded, and his fingers slid over and around and he pulled at her nipple again.

"So damn beautiful…"

She wound tighter, higher.

"Let me see you let go Dani…" He kissed her, soft and gentle as his fingers worked over the satin. His tongue just slipping over hers lightly, tasting, soft then he pulled back again.

"Nico…please…" She was shaking, so close.

"Come for me baby."

And she did, eyes on Nico as she let go quaking under him. "Oh my god…Nico…"

He kept stroking her until she came down and then he finally let her drag him into a kiss. She was still quivering, but she knew one thing; she wanted more.


	3. More, and Still Not Enough

_**NOTE:**_So, already another update. You can thank this one on my son's away football game and me needing to stay awake until 1:30 to pick him up. That meant coffee, which meant I was still up until almost 3am and what's a girl to do when she can't sleep? Well, write of course...it was either that or try to put myself to sleep reading medical journals or continuing education material and Nico and Dani were definitely more stimulating ;)!

This chapter should probably be two chapters, but I couldn't find a good place to divide it, so I didn't. I doubt anyone will complain. I hope you all enjoy it. Again, thanks to everyone for the reviews as they motivate my muse. Also, I don't just write smut. I do actually write a decent story from time to time, but so far this has been pretty smutty and I'm not sure this story will evolve much past smut. It really just started as me unhappy where things ended between Dani and Nico and I never fleshed out a plot, though I do have a few ideas on paper that I've wanted to write and never had time. So, I'm still not sure.

Anyway, I hope you all enjoy this chapter!

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**More, and Still Not Enough**

Nico kissed Dani while pulling his arms from his sleeves and tossing the shirt to the floor. Then Dani was above him, her breasts pressed to his chest, her hair flowing over him as she kissed his face. She was smiling. He could feel it as she kissed him. He gathered her hair in his fist and pulled it back so he could see her face. "Mmm, you look a bit self-satisfied?" His eyebrow rose in question.

She chuckled throatily and raked both sets of nails down his chest as she scooted down his chest, leaving a damp trail. "Not really _self-_satisfied, Mr. Careles," she giggled at her joke, "and not even close to completely satisfied, but…" she paused to work the open the buttons on his fly. "I must say, your skills are…well, WOW." She bit her lip.

He pulled a pillow from closer by the headboard and tucked it behind his head so he had a better angle to watch. "Wow?"

She nodded and ran her palm down the thick length of him through the fine wool of his pants. "Very, wow." She shivered and unzipped him, slipping her hand inside. Her eyes went wide with surprise.

He shot her an innocent look. "What?"

She stage whispered. "You're not wearing any…" Her hand ran over his cock and wrapped around it and she paused her sentence then when his breath caught with a soft moan. "Mmm, but it's very convenient." She smiled and stroked him again, this time pulling his length from his pants.

She savored the heavy feel of him in her hand and looked up at him before releasing him to grip his pants near his hips. She slid to his side. "Lift up." When he did, she pulled and with a bit of his help, got his pants off. She then pulled his socks off. She knelt between his ankles and stared up at him.

He laid there, heavy eyes watching her. His left hand rested on his chest, but while she watched his right hand slid down his belly to his cock. He didn't look away, but fisted himself and stroked up his length and then down with a twist and a small movement of his fist.

"Take your panties off Dani." He kept stroking himself, slow, but steady as she watched him.

Dani didn't want to admit it, but she was a bit bewitched. Watching Nico touch himself was turning her on so much.

"Dani."

She startled. "Huh?"

"Take your panties off." He stroked a bit faster, twisting his fist on the down stroke as he said her name.

She nodded and shoved the black satin down her hips and then over her knees to the floor, her eyes still on Nico. She didn't want to look away. His left hand stroked over his nipple every now and again. "You're so sexy…" She blushed when she realized she said that out loud.

"Don't be embarrassed. I'm not." He nudged Dani's knee with his foot, "spread your legs some for me." When she hesitated, he nudged again and paused his stroking. "Dani, please…"

She gave in and sat back on her ass, spreading her legs wide, which gave him a rather clear view of everything and she knew she blushed again.

"Touch yourself for me Dani." Nico shifted in the bed, bent one knee up and angled himself a bit higher on the pillow. "Like you would if you were alone, close your eyes and think about me making you cum." He stroked himself while she watched. "Do it Dani. Close your eyes and concentrate on what I tell you."

Just the thought had Dani breathless. She had never done that in front of anyone. She wasn't a prude, and she touched herself, hell she had three toys and wasn't against using the shower head and sure during sex she'd even lend herself a hand from time to time, but she had never, ever had anyone actually watch her touch herself this way. Even watching a man touch himself the way she was watching Nico was a first, Ray and definitely Matt, had ever done this in front of her.

"Nico, I don't know if…" She swallowed and as if her hand wasn't listening to her mouth it slid to her breast and lightly teased over her nipple. "I've never done this before with anyone…"

"Do you trust me?" Nico's voice was strained, as was his face when Dani saw it through the sudden sheen of nervous, frustrated tears in her eyes.

She nodded, her hand still stroking lightly over breast. "Yes." Her voice was quiet.

"Close your eyes for me then." He was stroking himself earnestly now, his breathing a bit unsteady, but still controlled.

Dani sighed and let her eyes slip shut.

"Good. You look so hot right now Dani, so damn sexy." His voice was less strained now, but gruff and thick. "Show me how you touch yourself Danielle." He shifted in the bed again and moved so his voice was closer to Dani, so low and seductive, "Imagine that it's late…you can't sleep and you're thinking about me touching you."

Dani could hear the need in his voice and it was so sexy. Hearing him talk to her this way was turning her on so much more. She nodded.

His breath moved the hair by her ear and she shivered. "You're wet and hot. Your pussy is slick and ready and you need to cum don't you?"

"Yes…Mmm. I do. I want to cum again." Her hand gripped her breast a bit harder than before.

The grip actually surprised Nico and he smiled as she roughly rolled her nipple and he slowed down his own stroking. "Nice baby. Keep going and show me what you want. How do you need it…what do you like Dani?"

Dani's head fell back on her shoulders and her hips moved forward as her hand drifted lower two fingers traced over her clit and then dipped inside, she curled her fingers forward and thrust into her palm, then she shifted her position and she was on her back, knees bent and her legs wide, forcing Nico to shift for a better view.

He watched as she fingered herself with her left hand and rubbed her clit with her right. Her breathing quickly became erratic. "Nico…please…" She panted, her head coming up off the bed and her eyes opening to find his, unfocused at first and then settling on him clearly. "Please…need…to please…"

He smiled and sat up leaning over her. He had asked her for one thing and she was still willingly giving it to him. He brushed hair from her face and nodded. "Oh Dani, so fucking incredible, so beautiful." He slid a finger alongside her two fingers and almost died at how hot she was, and then she was flying apart and gripping his arm as she screamed his name.

There was no coming down this time. He pressed her into the bed with his body and kissed her senseless while teasing her breasts until she begged him to stop. He didn't until he was good and ready to and that was only so that he could kiss his way down her belly.

He stopped when she yanked on his hair and threatened to kill him because it was her turn. He wasn't really ready to give up _his_ turn as she called it, but he was ready to end his torment for a while and there was tomorrow morning. So, he gave in without getting to his goal and looked up from nuzzling the fold of her thigh and let himself be led back up to her mouth.

She worked her way over him and he didn't protest her magic mouth and tongue teasing over his chest. His nipples were sensitive and he enjoyed her playing with them. Her nails grazed over them and he arched upward with a groan as she raked down his belly and her sharp nails then dragged down his upper thighs as well. "Mmm, very nice." He watched the light red trails rise up on his skin and his thoughts wandered elsewhere for a few seconds before he was suddenly brought back to Dani when her tongue grazed over the tip of his cock.

"Holy, shi…" He watched as she took the tip into her mouth then bobbed down and took his entire length. She gagged a bit pulled off and then gripped him at the base and set a steady up and down pace. She was quick, her hand mimicked his previous stroke with the twist he had been doing when he'd been stroking himself. His hips rose of their own accord into her hot mouth. She was eager and she applied suction and tongue just at the right point and every once in a while she'd let his entire length go deep, then alternate that with shallow thrusts against the velvet softness of her cheek and he was dying.

Her free hand teased his sac while she stroked and sucked him as well. Before, he embarrassed himself like a clumsy fourteen year old; he reached down and gently pulled Dani from his cock. "Come here…" He pulled her up and kissed her deeply.

She pulled back and gave him a look, "That doesn't bother you?"

He raised an eyebrow and kissed the hell out of her again, his hand moving lower and two fingers dipping into her tight wetness. He thrust inside her in rhythm with his tongue and then pulled back while his fingers still stroked her. "What?"

She moaned, trying to stay focused, as her hands gripped his shoulders. "Kissing me….after uhh. Shit…"

"Should it?" He pulled his fingers from insider her. They were dripping. "All it means is that the woman in my bed just did something amazing for me." He held his fingers up between them and then brushed them across Dani's lips. "I've wanted to taste you all night." He bent and ran his tongue over the glistening trail. "Just like the apples and scotch mixed together, earthy and tart."

Dani shivered and licked her lips. She never minded her own taste and wasn't shy about it. She reached for Nico's fingers and pulled them into her mouth. Her eyes were on his the entire time.

Nico loved the bold show and the pull of her lips and tongue went straight to his cock. He moaned and pressed his hips toward her belly. "Dani, I need you."

Dani shivered and reached for his cock. She stroked him as she kissed him. Then she pulled back, at first uncertain. Then she slid toward her bed stand, pulled open the drawer and opened the small box she stashed the condoms in. She had the package open before she turned back. With practiced ease she had the condom on and she was again pressed against Nico.

Nico rolled Dani beneath him. He rested on one hip and pushed her hair from her face before he bent to kiss her. It was a dangerous kiss, because that was how Nico felt at this point. He wanted to drown in Dani right now. To bury himself inside her, get lost so deep inside her he wouldn't be found for a week. He wanted Dani to forget both lovers she'd had before him, especially Matt. He wanted to stamp himself all over her. Mark her as his and make sure everyone knew about it.

He plundered her mouth. Taking and owning and he wasn't disappointed when she gave it right back to him. His teeth grazed and pulled and Dani moaned and arched up at him and it made him ache even more for her. He tightened his hold on her hair and she moaned deep in her throat. When he bit at her pulse point, she pressed harder into the bite with a sharp gasp. He rolled her nipple, pulling and twisting until she moaned and when he backed off for fear of hurting her, she whispered for him not to stop.

Dani shoved at his shoulder. "Please Nico…fuck me…"

She was writhing against him and honestly he was desperate to do just that. He settled between her legs and centered himself.

Dani bent one knee, and hooked her leg behind Nico's back. She needed him inside. She urged him forward, arching up to meet him.

"Dani." Nico gasped and pushed slowly inside. He slid in slow and it was torture for him and her as well. "Mmm, so hot baby…tight."

She made soft keening sounds in her throat and urged him forward. She moaned when he was inside, but still he wasn't moving. "You're killing me." She hit his shoulder.

He bit her ear until she stilled. "Shh." He pulled out completely and then slid in as slow as before and again Dani moaned the entire time. Out completely again and he waited.

Dani glared up at him. "You're evil." She tried to thrust up at him. "Please Nico…I need you."

He pressed his forehead to hers, struggling for his last bit of control. "I know exactly what you need, shh." He panted over her and then began to thrust shallowly inside her, just the head of his cock in and out until she was gripping his forearms and tossing her head side to side.

He hovered over her, sweat on his skin and heart hammering in his chest.

"Oh, fuck…Nico…what the hell…are you…doing to me?" She panted up at him in a haze of pleasured disbelief.

The kiss he pressed to her lips was passionate and quick. He pulled back to breath, quipped, "What?", then shifted his angle and with a sudden, violent thrust was full and deep inside her. He felt her explode around him and knew he was testing his self-control, but she was so damn beautiful. He pulled out and gripped the base of his cock firmly as he thought about end runs, wide outs, special teams… When he had some control he focused back on Dani. "You are so responsive." He kissed her and gave her a seriously sexy smile. "By the way, I like the way you say 'fuck'."

Dani wasn't sure she could breathe or move. She didn't know what the hell Nico was doing to her, or what kind of magic the man possessed, but he wasn't human. Maybe he was some kind of sexy incubus, half sex god or inhuman-sparkly-vampire-hybrid, whatever it was, she didn't know and didn't care, but right now her blood was singing and her body was throbbing in ways it never had before. She'd never cum so easily or so many times before. She gripped his shoulder and sighed.

"How do you do that?" She moaned when he rolled them so she was on top and he pulled her down for a sudden, rough kiss before shoving her gently back upright and cupping her breast with one hand so he could play over her clit with his other hand.

"What, roll us over?" He arched under her and circled his hips, so that he just brushed her sensitive flesh with his cock. "Keep myself from cumming? Make you cum over and over?" He tweaked her nipple and smiled when she moaned.

She gasped, braced herself on his chest and taking his invitation, she rose up and slid him back inside. "Oh, yea right there." She moved again as he circled below her. She bit her lip and focused on the man below her. She traced his features. He was beautiful, dark, mysterious, rugged, sexy. She traced a finger over his lips and chin. She gasped when he sped up. "Yesss, god Nico, perfect…so good." She ran her nails down his chest, scoring his nipples and he gasped under her.

Sweat was beading on his forehead and hers as they strained together. Nico's fingers were playing her in time with their thrusts and she gasped, her breathing started to falter and she knew she was close.

"Dani…need to…" He suddenly moved and she was under him once again.

This time was different. She found herself drowning in his need as he pounded into her at a bruising pace over and over, hard and deep. He wasn't giving her any mercy anymore, he was taking what he needed and Dani found she was more than willing to give it to him. She held onto him, nails digging in, looking for something to ground her. The pleasure spiraled upward, pressure built and the pain just pushed her over the edge. She came undone arching upward, crying out, "Nico, please…god, yes."

Nico held on until he felt her let go and it triggered his release. He threw his head back and with a roar he buried himself and came harder than he could remember in recent history. He collapsed on top of Dani in a heap before rolling to the side and disposing of the condom in the small trash can by the bed.

He pulled back the comforter and sheet and pulled Dani toward him as he settled back in bed and pulled the covers over them both. He tucked Dani against his side and kissed her head. Neither of them said anything for several minutes, hell, he wasn't sure either of them was capable of words. Nico was barely able to breath or put together a full thought.

After about ten minutes, their skin cooler, their breathing more regular. Dani sprawled herself over his chest and looked up at him with hooded eyes. He smiled at her and loved how well and thoroughly done in she looked. He couldn't help but comment on the fact either, "You look very properly fucked." He kissed her fingertips.

She used her shaky hand to push hair from her face. "That is one thing I am." She smiled and pressed a kiss to the pec beneath her. "Thank you."

Nico watched this woman blush, yet again, and he shook his head, before tucking an arm behind his head, his other tracing random patterns over her shoulder. "You just allowed me to use your body to pleasure myself and you are thanking me and blushing about it." He picked up a strand of hair and watched as it ran through his fingers. "Dani, it's me who should be saying thank you."

She gave him an odd look. "You are such a difficult man to figure out." She pushed her fingers through the hair on his chest and put her head on his shoulder. "You made me feel things I've never felt before Nico. I mean that. New things in here." She waved her hand around. "I mean, that's not really unusual I guess."

He felt her shrug against him before she went added.

"It was just Ray and then, well you know and now you, but I didn't think sex would be different. I mean you cum, you cum, right?" Her fingers paused on his chest and her thoughts paused. "So, how in the hell did I feel what I felt?"

He ran his hand over her hair, tucking it behind her ear and smoothing it down her back. He wasn't sure he could explain anything either, but he could try he supposed. "I don't know. Sometimes it's a connection thing." She started to interrupt him and he stopped her. "No, I'm not saying love. I'm not saying we're in love. Lust is not love. I'm definitely in lust with you Dani and I care deeply for you, and I think we could have more, but I'm not saying that's what we have now. "

"You think it's just lust?" She sat up now. The sheet forgotten, which gave Nico an eyeful and he didn't mind one bit

Nico pushed back, resting against the headboard. "No. I think we have more than lust. I think we get each other on a deeper level too." He sighed and pushed his hair off his forehead. It was getting a bit long, he needed to get it cut.

"I like it." Dani brushed his hand away and combed it back over his forehead a bit.

He raised his eyebrow. "What?"

"You're hair? I like it. Stop fussing over it."

"How did you know that's what was on my mind?" He gave her a funny look.

She shrugged. "I don't know, it looked like you realized it was there and then your mind switched from what we were talking about to the hair and you messed with it."

"See Dani, that's what I'm talking about though. You and I connect. You seem to know what's going on in my head, what I need, what I want."

She rubbed her forehead. "Okay, so how do you get me, Nico, because we are talking about how you made me feel. I might have been the worse sex you've ever had. You," She whistled, "boy, you are by far the best."

Nico laughed. He threw his head back and laughed a full belly laugh until Dani punched his shoulder. "Sorry." He held up his hands. "But, it's funny when you say it THAT way Dani. Don't tell me you don't see why it's funny."

She paused then her face tightened and she crossed her arms over her chest and tugged up the sheet.

"Whoa, okay, so it's not funny?" Nico sat forward. He wasn't trying to hurt her. He really did care about her and hell, he certainly had no problem with the fact that she'd only been with two men before him. He also didn't think it was that sensitive of a subject.

"It's not that Nico."

He thought for a second and then it hit him. He reached for her, "Danielle, holy shit." He scrubbed a hand over his face. He looked her in the eye. "Don't think for one second that what we just had together wasn't some of, if not _the_ best, sex of my life. If I was still twenty years old, I'd be back inside you already". He kissed her and put as much of what he felt behind it as he could. He tried to convince her with his body that he really did mean what he was saying.

It was only seconds before she melted into his arms with a soft moan. He rolled them to their sides, spooning her to his chest. He wrapped his arm around her. "If you still want an answer though Dani, I might have one." His hand strolled down her chest and toyed with her nipples.

She giggled and grabbed his hand. "Stop, but yes an answer to the why is good." She tried not to yawn, but wasn't successful.

He moved her hair and rested his chin her shoulder. "Has anyone ever taken control before? I mean in bed."

She was quiet for quite a few seconds and then she shook her head and turned a bit to see his face. "No. Not like you did." She shivered.

He pulled back to see her face, tucked more hair behind her ears and gave her a smile. "Did you like it Danielle? Did letting go and giving up control of your body and pleasure make it more intense? Did it thrill you?" His hand slid to the curve of her neck, his thumb stroking over her pulse. He felt it pounding.

She swallowed. "Sex has always been about sharing for me."

Nico smiled. "Didn't we just share? Tell me something Dani, do you feel safer with me now? Closer?"

She blushed again and nodded.

"I was who I am with you just then. I've never lied and I don't lie in bed either. I asked you to trust me with your body and you did. In return, I gave you what you needed and what you asked me for. I learned that you are strong and you guard yourself, but if you feel safe with someone, you will let that guard down and when you do whoever you let in is lucky." He smiled at her and hoped he never let her down because right now he felt really lucky. "You didn't answer my question though. Did you like it Dani?"

She searched his face and bit her lip. She started to talk and her voice cracked so she cleared her throat and started again. "More than I probably should have." Dani watched Nico's face. "Are you always like that?"

Nico shrugged. "Am I ever not that way? I like to be control at all times. I'm sure you'd tell me that it's a defense mechanism of some kind." He smiled and kissed her forehead. In fact he knew it was a defense mechanism. If he was in control he knew exactly how close everyone else was. He knew who was dangerous, where the exits where, who the players were; it was how he lived and why he was good at what he did. "But if you're asking me about what I like in bed. I often prefer a bit more control than even tonight, but I'm male Dani, which means when it comes to sex I'm infinitely flexible. But overall, In bed I like when I can guarantee the results. I always know exactly what the outcome will be and that satisfies me." He shifted their positions so that they were sharing the pillow. He was getting tired. It had been a long day. He tucked her closer and draped a hand over her waist as he pulled up the covers. His mouth was close to her ear and low and seductive as he spoke. "We only scratched the surface tonight, but I'm complex and like I said, you were my best ever." He gently bit her ear and then kissed it while teasing her nipple. When she shivered he stopped. "…or really close anyway."

Dani giggled and elbowed his chest gently. "Nico…" She hissed at his teasing words even though his teasing mouth and fingers were causing heat in her belly all over again. "Wait a minute…" she slapped his hand from her breast, "there's more you want?"

Nico chuckled and nuzzled her neck as he pressed his now partially interested cock against her ass. "Oh Dani, the things I wanted to do with my belt."


	4. They Take Your Belt in Jail

**_NOTE:_** Okay, I'm posting earlier than I expected, on my rare day off - which by the way during the school year, I enjoy ridiculously more than weekends because there are no kids underfoot and I can do what I want - so today it's a long bath and lunch with a friend and then a hair appointment. Sadly, there is no smut in this chapter, but life is not lived in bed and I do hope you'll enjoy it anyway, because like me, Dani has those pesky kids...

* * *

**They Take Your Belt in Jail**

The first ring woke him. He was used to the phone calls at all hours and, as usual, he was instantly awake. He rolled easily, trying not to disturb Dani and he had the house phone in his hand, before the second ring. He recognized the number and sighed. It was the local police. He hit the answer button just as the third ring woke Dani. She sat up with a worried look on her face and reached for the phone, but Nico already had it to his ear, not really caring who knew he was there.

"Hello."

"Nico is that you?" Ray Jay's voice squeaked. "Shit, then you probably already know." He sounded terrified and relieved at the same time.

Nico grabbed Dani's hand softly in his and he gently squeezed it. He was already assessing the situation. His kept his voice calm. "Why else would I be here at three in the morning Ray Jay."

At Ray Jay's name Dani flipped on the lamp, reached for the phone more earnestly and started to speak, but Nico held a finger to his lips and kept his eyes on her while he spoke to her son. He shook his head and hoped she understood what he was trying to do.

"Nico, I swear the plants weren't mine and I was taking them to the dump. Damn, I'm going to kill Tyler when I get a hold of him." There was noise on the other end and Nico heard someone, probably an officer, say he had another minute. "Did you tell mom? God, she's going to kill me…I tried to call Dad like four times, but he didn't answer his phone and they kept asking me questions and..."

Nico interrupted Ray Jay's rambling, guiding him back to get information he needed. "Did you talk to anyone Ray Jay? Did you admit to anything? If you didn't; don't." Nico prayed that he didn't.

Ray Jay's voice was cracking, Nico could hear his fear and panic. He wasn't sure how long the police had held him, but he figured it had been quite some time.

Ray Jay's voice shook. "Not really…I'm scared Nico. They keep telling me I'm in big trouble and asking where the rest of the plants are. All I keep saying is that there aren't any more. I have to go. Come get me please. I'm at the stati…"

The call ended and Nico hung up the phone. He put the phone on the table, but kept his eyes on Dani as he saw the panic on her face. "You still trust me Dani, remember that. I was only going to see who was calling, but when it was the police I answered."

She grabbed the phone and glanced at the screen. It was just a number, one she didn't recognize at all. "How did you know that's who it was?" Her voice rose with her panic.

"I'm used to getting calls from the payphones at the local police departments. I have them all memorized." He flipped back the comforter. "We need to get moving. Ray Jay is at the police station, he's scared and he thinks I'm here because I know what's going on already." He held his hand out and waited for Dani to take it. "I wasn't counting on you needing my other services tonight." He winked and turned to hunt for his clothes.

* * *

They took Nico's Lincoln and made good time since the roads were basically empty at this time of the morning. Nico parked the car and when Dani got out of the car, he grabbed her hand. "Dani, hold up."

"Nico, my son is inside and I need to get him so I can kill him." She glared up at him with her hands on her hips.

"He was arrested Dani, he's not hurt, he's in a police holding room. No one's going to kill him before you." He checked his wallet, money clip and phone. "From his call, my guess is something bout marijuana plants and getting caught with them." He saw her grind her teeth together in anger and he put a hand on her shoulder. "Calm down. We have to handle this wisely Dani." He glanced around. "I need to know a couple of things. He mentioned the name Tyler. Who is he?"

Dani rubbed her forehead. "Tyler…Tyler Harper maybe, they played soccer together in junior high, have a few classes together this yeahr and he was at the house because Lindsay said he was a jerk and it started a big argument between her and Ray Jay about…"

Nico gently shook her to cut her off. "Dani, okay Tyler Harper we have a name, good. Now, has Ray Jay ever been arrested before? For anything, any misdemeanors at all, has he ever had to go to court for anything more than a parking ticket?"

Dani shook her head. "No, no nothing Nico. God, never…he's a good kid. I swear, he wouldn't do this." She closed her eyes. "What the hell is happening?"

Nico pulled her into a quick hug and kissed the top of her head. It wasn't anything other than a quick reassurance that he wouldn't have done before they had fallen into bed. "We're about to find out. Hold on one second."

He pulled out his phone and dialed a number from memory. It rang three times. "It's me. I'm texting you some info and I'll add to it as I get it. I need everything you can find on this kid and I need it yesterday. Arrests, parking tickets, family history, everything…yes, keep it as quiet as you can. Keep me updated as you get the information." He hung up. Texted Tyler's name, school, grade and the other information Dani had given him. It was enough to get Ronnie started.

He turned to Dani and then nodded toward the police station. "One more thing Dani, no matter what happens inside, try to keep your cool."

She nodded. "Okay." She squared her shoulders and settled her purse across her chest. "Okay, let's go."

Inside, Nico approached the Duty Sergeant's desk with an even expression. "We're here for Raymond Santino, Jr."

The sergeant looked up from his computer with an annoyed look. "Who?"

"Raymond Santino, Jr." Nico said evenly, once again.

Dani's foot started tapping in aggravation.

Nico shot her a look and shook his head. He knew this was a power play by the police and he knew how to play the game. Step one usually was, don't annoy the Duty Sergeant.

Dani stopped her tapping and slid closer to Nico when the drunk with the black eye and dried blood under his nose that was sobering up on a nearby bench started sniffing her arm.

Nico tried not to laugh, but he did make sure the guy was cuffed securely to the bar on the bench before he glanced back to the guy behind the computer.

"You his father? The kid called you about six times you know? Not one for answering your phone, are you?" The guy eyed Dani in her designer clothes and ever present heels. He leaned over his desk and waved toward Dani. "You divorce his mom and get too busy banging this one to bother?" He winked and licked his lips. "Not that I blame you, let the kid cool his heels a bit while that one gets hers knees dirty for you."

Dani took a step forward. Nico took her hand, stopping her and she glared at him.

Nico's other hand fisted at his side so hard his knuckle cracked. He caught Dani's eyes, and silently willed her to trust him. He watched the war on her face. Her need to defend herself, her son, her reputation and even him and he respected her even more for it, but he saw when the reality of the situation won out. They were in a police station. Police had the power, which meant they needed to play by their rules to some extent…at least until the police realized that the power had shifted.

He took a deep breath and exhaled before he took a step closer to the man's desk and glanced at his uniform. "Actually no Sergeant Penwell, this is his mother and I'm her associate. If you'd like we could call our lawyer, but we're trying to avoid that at this point, but if you'd like me to add a police harassment complaint, I'd be happy to take down your badge number and call him right now." He pulled his phone from his pocket and he could still feel Dani's anger coming off her in waves. He massaged loose her death grip on his hand and willed her to be calm while he repeatedly traced a simplified kanji character for balance over the palm of her hand, with his thumb. He kept his eyes on the officer and waited for his words to sink in while his other thumb hovered over the contact list of his phone. The threat wasn't empty, he'd just as soon dial the Hawks lawyer as not, but when he saw the fear on the man's face, he backed off. "What charges are you holding the boy on?" He purposely used the term boy to drive home Ray Jay's age. Almost eighteen yes, but not yet.

The man cleared his throat and looked away, his face red and ashen at the same time. "Ah, let me see…we only have him on a misdemeanor at this point. Guess the kid didn't say anything, but why he didn't lawyer up if he had one." He shrugged, "He had a broken tail light and the arresting officer noticed marijuana plants in the vehicle. Guess there were two, but they were babies and he had pulled them up and kinda chopped them up, so all we have him on really is, well not much."

Dani's grip on Nico's hand had relaxed with the impromptu massage and he gave her a reassuring squeeze thankful that Ray Jay wasn't a total idiot.

"Are you releasing him with a fine and a court date then?" Nico knew the drill.

He glanced at the computer again. "Uh, looks like." The sergeant pointed down the hall. "Third door on the left is the cashier. I'll call down to holding and have the kid brought up. I think his paperwork is already finished. It should be anyway, he's been here long enough. His fine should be between five and seven-fifty and it's cash only."

Nico nodded, turned and nudged Dani toward the cashier's window. He bent close to her ear. "It's gonna be alright Dani. Calm down."

She looked up at him like a mixture of protective bear and frightened rabbit, but nodded at him as they entered the cashier. "That guy was one of the biggest assholes I've been around in a long time and trust me working with you and the Hawks I've been around plenty."

Nico smirked. "Cops, soldiers, doctors, firemen…people like me, we aren't nice people a lot of the time. We get pretty jaded with people, but yes he was out of line to say it out loud."

"He was out of line to even think it."

"I'll try to remember not to think out loud around you then." He motioned her through the doorway marked Cashier.

There was an armed officer sitting by the door reading a paper and he didn't bother to look up when they walked in. The wall adjacent to the door was lined with long wooden benches and two bank style teller windows stood behind thick, bullet proof glass were opposite the door. There was a screen with digital numbers and a red ticket dispenser between these windows. The numbered screen was on '36', there were six people sitting on the benches and then Dani and Nico, who just entered the room. Dani took a number, it was '39'. She didn't feel that was bad.

Nico chuckled. "No, it never seems all that bad, just wait." He motioned to an empty section of bench that included a corner, he checked his watch and they sat down.

He sat in the corner and angled himself so that Dani could lean against him. "We're going to be a while."

"But it's only three numbers." She held up the ticket.

His eyebrow went up and he rested his head against the wall and closed his eyes. "We could make a bet, but I'd feel bad taking your money."

She didn't like how cocky he sounded, which meant he knew he was right. She sighed and leaned back against the wall with an annoyed grunt. "Tell me something."

"Hmm?"

"What were you doing in there on my hand?" She set her hand on his thigh, palm up. "That pattern thing on my palm when Sergeant Sexual Harassment had me all riled up?"

He took her hand and started tracing the same pattern again. "It's just a pattern thing."

She rolled her head along the wall to stare at him, she noticed the upward quirk of his lip and knew she wasn't going to get more out of him. "Fine", the pattern was relaxing and before she knew it her eyes were drifting shut.

_Almost 2 hours later…_

"THIRTY-NINE"

Nico nudged Dani, from his shoulder. "Hey, sleeping beauty…time to spring your young prince."

"Wha?..." She wiped drool from her face and then realizing she'd been drooling on Nico's shoulder, from his shoulder as well. "God Nico, how embarrassing…." Then remembering where she was. "Ray Jay."

He continued to wipe his shoulder without any distaste. "Yes, we're thirty-nine. Let's pay so we can get the hell out of here." He stood, stretched his back, wishing he was half as flexible as his cat because he one hell of a kink left in it. He helped Dani to her feet and then stepped toward the window. "Thirty-nine."

The grey haired woman behind the window gave him a large, genuine, but tired smile. Dani guessed, she was in her mid-sixties. "Haven't seen you around for a while Nico Careles."

Nico returned her smile. "Ah, Mrs. Spanelli I thought you retired."

She threw a hand up and tsked at him. "In this economy, are you kidding me? Do you know how much my blood pressure medication costs me every month?" She raised a well groomed eyebrow at him. "I took a transfer." She leaned forward, conspiratorially. "It's quieter around here and the pay's the same, but the drive is a son of a bitch." She winked.

Dani giggled and Nico chuckled. "Well, if I knew you were working out here I would have brought you some of your favorite chocolates." He winked at her in return and then turned to Dani. "Dani, let me introduce you to one of the best cashiers that ever graced any office in New York State. Marcia Spanelli, this is Dani. Dani Santino, Marcia Spanelli."

Dani smiled and waved.

Mrs. Spanelli gave Dani an approving glance and then looked to Nico. "How many times I tell you now that you're all grown, you call me Marcia. She's cute Nico; hold onto that one, nothing like your usual arm candy. This one's got character. She'd be good for you." Marcia noticed Dani blush. "Ha, don't worry sweetie, you're secret's safe with me. I won't tell anyone he wants in your honeypot. Nico's good people." She leaned forward and staged whispered toward Dani. "Don't let his bad boy thing fool you. He grew up with my boys, back in PA. I saw him naked in the wading pool when he was knee high, but then I bet you saw him naked since then didn't you?" She threw her head back and laughed and it was Nico's turn to blush. "Okay, before you kill me with your pinky finger, who you here for Nicholas?"

Dani turned back and mouthed, 'NICHOLAS', before she addressed Marcia, "My son, Raymond Santino, Jr."

Marcia typed the name into the computer and then they waited, answered several questions, waited. There were forms, more questions and more forms. Then there was the seven hundred dollar fine.

Nico pulled his money clip from his pants before Dani even asked where the closest ATM was. He counted the bills and slid them to Marcia.

"Nico." Dani's voice was low, her hand on his arm. "I don't think this is appropriate."

"What?" He waited for the paperwork to finish and for the receipt and put all of it into the inside pocket of his jacket.

"You paying Ray Jay's fine." Dani glanced around the room expectantly, as if Ray Jay would suddenly appear. "I'll pay you back as soon as we leave."

Nico almost rolled his eyes. He turned to Marcia. "Thanks for all your help Marcia. I'll send some chocolates over."

She smiled. "I know you will Nico, you always do. I'll tell Mikey you said hi."

"You do that."

"You could always stop by and say hi yourself, you know." Marcia tacked on as Nico turned to leave.

Nico glanced back. "Like I said, say hello for me and keep an eye out for those chocolates." He herded Dani out the door and back down the hall. "Dani, there's no need for that. You're part of the Hawk's organization, as part of that organization you are entitled to certain services. I offer some of those services. How many times have you watched me bail out team members at", he straightened his arm to check the time, "five thirty in the morning?"

Dani snorted and rolled her eyes. He was right. More times than she could count, she'd either been at the police station, the hospital or woken at her home for some crisis that involved Nico bailing some player or person involved with a player out of jail or some other form of trouble. "Okay, but I should still probably pay you back."

"I bill the Hawks, don't worry about it."

They headed back past the desk sergeant and Nico sat them in an empty bench by the door where they had a clear view of the door opening from the holding area. It was only about ten more minutes and the door opened and Ray Jay came out with an officer.

Dani was up and had her arms around him in seconds. Nico hung back, but he could hear Dani giving Ray Jay the third degree in a hushed voice from across the room. He knew what Dani's wrath was like and he had a small rush of pity on the kid, not much, it was a stupid move after all, but he wasn't cold hearted. He shook his head and moved to the desk to collect Ray Jay's things. He held out his hand for the envelope and listened as the officer read the list of property.

"One cell phone, one wallet containing a school ID, driver's license, ATM card, two condoms, assorted receipts, seven dollars and thirteen cents, one studded belt and three rubber bracelets." The officer slid the property list under the wire divider and waited for the signature.

"Dani, Ray Jay they need your signatures over here." Nico pointed out the lines on the forms. "Make sure everything is here Ray Jay, if you sign and then it's not here, it's very hard to prove."

Ray Jay checked over his belongings, sliding his things into his pockets and then signing the form. "It's good, can we go now?!" He pulled his belt from the desk and sulked toward the door.

Nico pointed at the other blank on the page and waited for Dani to sign. Her hand was shaking. When he grabbed it she looked at him, there were tears in her eyes. "Dani, it's okay."

She nodded, signed the paper, wiped her eyes and then took the copy the clerked handed her. "I'm so angry right now Nico. I'm tired, I need coffee, a shower and to yell at my son. Take me home, please." She took a breath and then her heels were clicking out the door.


	5. Coffee Doesn't Always Do the Trick

**_NOTE:_**Another chapter up, no big smut, but there's some coming. Why because, well I happen to like smut and obviously you guys do too if reviews are anything to go by...seriously, it's the law of diminishing reviews. An increased effort for plot is directly proportional to a decreased number of reviews. It's all good, I'll post if no one reviews, I'm just pointing out a pattern.

Oh, and this weekend is Homecoming, we won tonight and last week too and tomorrow is the dance of course.

Anyway, enjoy and again...all mistakes are mine because I'm busy and have no beta and if I did you might never see a chapter.

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**Coffee Doesn't Always Do the Trick**

By the time they got in the car, the traffic was horrible. It was Monday and the roads were filled with commuters. Nico sighed. He tried to avoid the roads this time of day if he could. He hit his signal and pulled off the expressway.

"Nico, where are you going?" Dani demanded since he was now heading away from the house.

"Coffee, you said you needed coffee and so do I." He caught Dani's eye for a second before he checked traffic and turned left from the off ramp. "We can sit in traffic for the next hour, or sit in a good café and drown our sorrows in espresso and croissants." He made another turn and then looked into the back seat where Ray Jay still sat in silence. "I'm sure none of us got much sleep last night and Ray Jay could probably use some food, right?"

Ray Jay sat forward. "God yes, I'm starving."

Dani shot him an icy glare. "All you deserve for the next week is bread and water Ray Jay."

He fell back into the leather seat with a pout. "Mom, I said I'm sorry…I'm stupid and I'm sorry and no, I don't do drugs. I'll piss in whatever effing cup you want me to. Just feed me." He ended on a whine.

"Ray Jay, I expect that you'll show some respect to your mother and not talk to her like you would to your friends in the locker room." Nico pulled the car into a rundown shopping center and slid into a space before he turned around and looked Ray Jay straight in the eyes. "Apologize."

Ray Jay swallowed hard. "I'm…I didn't mean to ah say ah…I'm sorry."

Dani hid her smile and turned around. "It's fine Ray Jay. Not about the whole marijuana thing, but the rude words, I understand. The rest we need to talk about." She looked at Nico. "So, where's the coffee you're buying me?"

He opened his door, "Come on, best place around, and it almost became a memory after Starbucks opened up on every other corner." He pointed down the street to the green sign.

The three of them exited the car and after setting the alarm, he led them through the parking lot to a storefront café. To his credit, it was busy inside, which to Dani meant that it much at least be passable.

He took them to an empty booth toward the back waving to one of the waitresses on the way.

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Ray Jay took one of the bench seats and Dani, wanting Nico beside her for his quiet strength was sure to tug his jacket so he sat beside her. As soon as she sat down, she realized exactly why Nico liked the coffee here. The entire back wall behind the bar was covered by three antique espresso machines, which were still in use. "It smells like heaven in here."

Nico chuckled as he watched Ray Jay watch the cute waitress in the short skirt bend over to clean a nearby table. "Only if heaven smells like strong coffee and pastry, but I'd vote heaven smells completely different."

Dani missed the conspiratorial wink Nico shared with her son, but when Ray Jay laughed she gave them both a funny look. "Did I miss something?"

Nico shook his head and nudged Ray Jay with his foot when he continued ogling the girl. "No, nothing. I know what I want, but there are menus by the napkin holders and specials on the board." He pointed to the chalkboard behind them. "Everything's good."

Dani tapped her nails on the table and knew he was hiding something, but her need for caffeine won out. She glanced at the board.

"I think I'll try the chocolate croissant and a latte then."

Nico smiled, "Good choice, they add cinnamon and a touch of cayenne to the chocolate it's excellent." He glanced at Ray Jay. "How about you?"

"I'm starving, almost too hungry to care."

"Then I'll order for you." Nico was up to the counter before Ray Jay had a second to reconsider and as soon as he was, Dani leaned into her son.

"Ray Jay, don't think for one second that just because Nico's here your butt is safe." She was leaning over the table, mom mode at full intensity, if not low volume. "He's seen more crap from people than just about anyone and your crap isn't anything new and he's already involved." She waved her hand in the air in agitation, and then pressed both palms down on the table as she took a deep breath. "It's embarrassing as hell that my son was," she lowered her voice even more, "arrested, do you know that can affect me professionally Ray Jay? Do you know it can affect my job with the Hawks? You know- the job that pays the bills?" She took a breath and told herself to be calm. She was starting to lose it and she didn't want to. She tried to remember being seventeen, being stupid, oh god she was so stupid at seventeen. Hell, she'd been involved with Ray at seventeen. She dropped her head onto her arms which she crossed on the table. She couldn't keep the tears from her eyes and her shoulders shook as she sobbed silently.

She wasn't surprised to feel warmth beside her. She was getting used to it, but she was very shocked that it was her son.

Ray Jay awkwardly patted her back. "Mom, god really I'm so sorry. I never meant to like…oh man. I wasn't thinking. I'm such a damn idiot. I told myself once that I'd never be like dad and make you cry like this. Now I'm more pissed at myself than you could ever be." He rubbed her back and hugged her shoulder. "Please mom, forgive me. I'm stupid and I'm sorry…and I'll do whatever I need to make it up to you…"

He paused then and his hands stilled. "Uh, Mom, there's like people looking at us and stuff." He sounded like he was talking through gritted teeth. "It's kinda embarrassing."

Dani laughed then, she just started giggling. She sat up and pulled Ray Jay into a big hug. "Ray Jay, how can you be such a man and such a kid in the space of a single sentence?" She pulled back and looked him in the face. She wiped her eyes. "Okay, we're going to figure this out and you're going to explain this to me completely later. You're going to pay Nico back the seven hundred dollars it cost for the fine and me whatever it's going to cost to get your car out of impound. Then we're going to discuss the actual punishment for what you did."

To his credit he didn't complain, he just pouted some, nodded his head, mumbled, "Fine", and then moved sullenly back into his seat.

They sat in silence for several minutes. Dani's hands were shaking, but she was pulling herself back together when then Nico arrived with their drinks and food. He'd gotten a double espresso for himself along with a simple plain donut. For Ray Jay there was a breakfast special, an everything bagel with cream cheese, egg and corned beef and coffee. And if the way Ray Jay moaned after the first bite was any indication, then the sandwich was very good.

Dani couldn't have been happier with her croissant. Nico knew his food. The chocolate was definitely divine. "Oh my god, Nico", she closed her eyes as chewed. "That is so good." The chocolate was warm and it ran down her fingers. "How did you ever find this place?" She asked as she licked her fingers, not willing to give up any of the chocolate.

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Nico watched and struggled to pay attention to what she was saying. Her sensuality with food was so similar to her sensuality in bed that his mind was immediately elsewhere and having heard her say those exact words to him while she was under him… god he was dying. He uncrossed his ankles and stopped watching her lick her fingers. He took a sip of his coffee and cleared his mind. "I used to meet people here from time to time."

Dani smiled at him, ever evasive she didn't press him. She took another bite of the roll and chased it with her coffee and decided that this place wasn't too far from her house to be out of the way. Those croissants were now officially a favorite.

Ray Jay finished his bagel and sat back with a yawn. "You mind if I lay down in the car? I didn't really get any sleep. Not like they let me in there, they kept bugging me."

Nico glanced at Dani. "It's up to your mother. It's okay with me."

Dani nodded. "As long as you stay in the car Ray Jay."

Nico canted his head toward the door. "That's not a problem. I can set the alarm once he's inside."

Ray Jay shrugged. "Don't care, I just want to stretch out and nap like I said, seriously." He shoved away from the table and flung himself out the door.

Nico followed, unlocked the car from the lot, and once Ray Jay was inside, locked it again, then he sat back down beside Dani as she finished her croissant.

He picked up his espresso, almost finished with it, but not quite. He sipped and kept his eyes forward, but watched Dani finish the crumbs from her plate from the corner of his eye. "Do you know what the Italian director Federico Fellini supposedly once said about women and food?"

"What?" Dani gave him a sidelong glance, pretty sure he was about to make a comment about how inappropriate it was to eat with her fingers or something, as she wiped at the last of the chocolate on the plate with her index finger and then licked it off with her tip of her tongue. She didn't really care and she would tell him so when he did.

Nico's eyes darkened as he caught her eyes. "'Never trust a woman who doesn't like to eat. She is probably lousy in bed' and I say that because anyone watching you eat that croissant would immediately know that you were passionate, sensual and giving in bed." He angled himself in the booth and moved closer, "I could barely walk your son to the door after watching you." He brushed hair off her shoulder so he could enjoy the curve of her neck. His finger traced a line over her collarbone. His voice was quiet and seductive. "You said my name after you bit into that croissant in that same sultry way you did in bed last night and all I could think about was seeing you naked again Danielle."

He watched her blush and it made him smile. "I love when you do that, you know."

"What?" She shivered. She couldn't help it. She knew that in any new relationship there was that feeling of exhilaration, biochemical reactions that caused attachments, but this was different. Matt had never made her feel this sexual, this primal, yes she'd loved him, she was still getting over him and in some ways still mourning him, and sex with him had been great fun and she'd enjoyed it. But she'd never really let go with Matt, maybe because she knew he always wanted something she couldn't give him.

With Nico there was a difference. There was no doubt about what he wanted. It felt right. Every part of her vibrated and when he looked at her like he was now with his hazel eyes, filled with dark, carnal promises, she knew that Nico wasn't looking for a mother for his future children. And while she wasn't sure if Nico was looking for a serious relationship beyond a lover, he told her he cared for her and even before he had her in his bed, she knew he considered her his friend. And he promised her that if he had her once he would have her again. It was that thought that sent a second shiver down her spine and heat spiraling between her legs.

Nico noticed. He bent to her ear. "Your nipples just hardened."

She licked her dry lips. "Get out of my head Nico." She was a bit breathless.

His hand stole into her hair and his thumb traced her jawline. "You don't really want that Dani. You like that I know what gets you hot." He wiped a bit of chocolate from the corner of her lip and then moved his hand away. The casual observer would have thought that's all he was doing in the first place. "Do you want another cup?" He motioned to her empty cup. "I'm going to get one for the road."

When she shook her head he moved back up to the counter.

She took a deep breath and for a split second she wondered how big the bathroom stalls were in this place and that was something she hadn't considered since she was a stupid seventeen yeahr old kid.

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"Before you run away Ray Jay, I need to know where the plants actually came from." Nico leaned against his car, arms crossed as Ray Jay headed into the house.

He stopped and turned with a sigh. "Now?"

"Now, Ray Jay." Dani stalked up to her son and grabbed his arm, dragged him back to Nico and continued, "You tell Nico everything he wants to know, you do anything he asks and then thank him for helping you and I don't want you hear bitch and moan about how tired or hungry or anything else about it either. When he says he's done, then you're done too. Is that understood?"

"Yeah." He slumped against the car beside Nico and crossed his arms. "Fine, what do you need to know?"

"If he doesn't cooperate, feel free to use brute force. I won't press charges." She winked. "I'm going to take a shower, then probably a nap since I was up half the night, because of a certain someone." She glared in the general direction of the car as she walked away.

Nico kept the smile off his face and let Ray Jay wallow in his guilt; after all they were up the other half the night because of him.

Nico cleared his throat. "I'll make sure to return him in mostly working order."

Dani waved a hand as she opened the door. "Good enough." Then she was gone

Nico watched Ray Jay swallow and then he turned to face him. "First, who is Tyler?"

"Shit. Tyler's an ass."

"And you're an idiot, but that doesn't help me. Your mother gave me the name Harper, correct?"

Ray Jay nodded and wiped his hand over his hair quickly three times. "Yeah, he talked me into buying into a fantasy football league for two grand. We were supposed to split it, a grand each only I couldn't come up with my half so he was gonna spot me if I let him use the back yard for his side project."

"The weed?"

"Yeah. Simple right? He puts two little plants in the garden, lets them grow and I talk to Matt, get a little inside info about the draft and bam we make a cool ten grand a piece when we win." Ray Jay pushed away from the car and started pacing. "Only no one tells me that TK's hooked on pain killers and is heading to rehab so when we draft him, which of course we do, why wouldn't we?" He paused looked at Nico and threw his hands up in the air.

Nico shrugged and tried not to laugh.

Ray Jay started pacing again. "So, yeah, we draft him and then bang. They said he had to go to rehab and I cried NO, NO, NO. And then Tyler, well he just got pissed all to hell and I told him to get fucked and take his plants and shove them up his ass and he said they were staying until they were done growing and I said, the hell they were and if he didn't dig them up I would. Then he knocked out my taillight and left and I pulled those fuckers up and was taking them to the dump and well, I got pulled over for my taillight and you know the rest."

"Take a breath," Nico walked around to the back of his car and popped the trunk. He pulled a heavy duffle toward him and reached in for a flask. He glanced toward the house and then unscrewed the cap. He held it to Ray Jay. "One sip."

"What is it?" Ray Jay took the flask and tipped it back. He coughed and pulled a face at the bitter taste. "It's horrible."

Nico took a pull, and put the cap back on. "Bach's Rescue Remedy and some brandy, and some crushed beta blockers. It's good for the nerves, slows the heart rate and keeps things steady. Right now, you're a bit…over-caffeinated." He returned the flask to the bag, but pulled the bag from the trunk and slung it over his shoulder. "Show me where the plants were."

Ray Jay nodded and motioned for Nico to follow him around back. There were still two ugly holes in the sod, relatively deep in the otherwise pristine yard.

Nico frowned and glanced around the well-manicured yard. He motioned to the kitchen window and then the upstairs, windows. "If the plants would have been full sized your mother would have been able to see them from the kitchen. Not to mention the neighbors from their second floors. How about upstairs, which one is your mother's room?"

Ray Jay pointed to the one with the best view of the yard. Nico already knew the answer. "So, right now your mother can see these beautiful holes from her bedroom as well? Every time she pulls back her curtains she'll be reminded?"

"I'll fill the holes back in."

"That's only a patch Ray Jay. It would eventually cover over with crab grass and stick out like a big scar in the middle of this beautiful yard. Sure, you could put some grass seed on it, but it's going to take a long time for that to grow to match the sod."

"I can buy some sod…" He paused deflated. "If I had any damn money."

Nico motioned to the patio set, "Sit with me."

Ray Jay dropped onto a chair dejectedly. "I really suck."

Nico shook his head and set his bag down. "No, you're a young, stupid kid who has a lot to learn." He leaned forward on his knees. "When I was your age I was stupid, a lot like you." He held up his hand. "Yes, trust me. I will not go into embarrassing detail, just let it be said I did plenty of idiotic things and if Facebook and smartphones existed back then I would never have the job I have today."

Ray Jay was sitting up a little straighter. "I wish you'd share just one of those things with me."

"And I wish that the moon was made out of blue cheese, but it isn't and this isn't about me, it's about you." Nico looked Ray Jay in the eye. "Look kid, growing up isn't easy, but you don't have a choice. Tell me something. What was this ten grand for anyway?"

Ray Jay snorted. "Getting out of here."

Nico looked around. "Here? What the hell is wrong with here?"

"What's right about it? Lindsay, mom always breathing down my neck, cramping my style, Dude, I can't even have…" he dropped his voice to a whisper, "sex in my own room."

Nico shook his head, what he wouldn't have given for a bit of what this kids problems are while he was growing up. "First, if you can't say the word sex without whispering it like a code word, you probably shouldn't be having it at all," he pinched the bridge of his nose. "I almost feel sorry for the girl."

"Hey!" Ray Jay shoved Nico's shoulder lightly. "Dude, that's not cool. She said I rocked her world."

Now Nico laughed. "Okay, I'm sure you did," he held up his hands in defeat, "I'm sorry, but back to the point. Here is not really a bad place. Your mother loves you and sometimes mothers over protect. They don't mean to, but they do and I don't think your mother said you were required to stay until the end of time either."

"No, just that she thought I had to go to some lame state college or stay local so I could commute. That's what sucks. I don't want to commute. I mean really, what kind of college experience is that?"

"The kind where you get an education," Nico gave him an even look, but he knew what the kid was getting at. "I know what you're saying, but you and your mother are talking about two different things. She wants you to educate yourself while you're more worried about how many extra-curricular activities you can sign little Ray Jay up for that include," he whispered "sex. If you stay home", he cocked an eyebrow, "not really cool to bring the girls back to mom's place. I get it."

"Ugh, you're making me feel worse. Is this supposed to be punishment? It's working." Ray Jay went back to pout mode, arms crossed and head back on the chair.

Nico shook his head. "No this isn't punishment, just a reality check, you should be happy you have a nice home, a family that loves you and cares about you and that comes to get you when you call them. Do you know some kids don't. They don't have parents that take care of them. Some kids have parents that abuse them, drink and leave them in jail even when it's their fault they're there. Some kids struggle to survive and would beg to be in your position, or even to sleep on your couch. Some kids are grown up long before they're your age because they have to be and then wish they weren't. They look at you trying to grow up so fast and would tell you to stop and enjoy being seventeen until you can't be anymore. But, me, I'm just your mom's associate and friend and I don't like when you're an idiot. Capice?"

Ray Jay nodded and swallowed. He wasn't quite sure what to make of everything Nico just said, but he did get the last bit. "Got ya."

Nico nodded toward the shovel in the yard. "Now, I want you to grab that shovel and dig those two holes out. I want them about eighteen inches wide and about two feet deep each. If you're finished before I get back, weed the flower bed behind it."

"Manual labor, isn't there a law or something?!" Ray Jay jumped up and stomped to the shovel. "You're as bad as mom."

"I could make it worse. I know how to disappear things." Nico picked up his bag and tried the back door, he was a bit surprised that it was open. He glanced over his shoulder to see that Ray Jay was starting on the first hole.

"You might want to give him these." Dani was suddenly in front of him with a pair of gloves. "He'll get blisters. He always does." She moved the fridge and grabbed a bottle of water and then snagged a pair of earbuds from the counter. "He might appreciate this too." She held the water and wires up with a half-smile. "I don't know what you're up to, but thanks."

Nico shook his head. "You make a horrible jailer."

"I know." She glanced out the window. "I just feel kinda sorry for him."

He sighed and took the things out. Dani was right, Ray Jay was thrilled with the earbuds and he did appreciate the water and gloves. He went back in and held up his bag.

"I need to change and take a quick drive."

"Where to?" She was curious. She was actually very curious about a lot of things, but that could wait. Pushing Nico was usually not good.

"It's a secret mission." He moved toward the stairs. "Can I use the bedroom?"

Dani followed. "Only if I can watch", she teased.

Nico turned at the bottom of the stairs, dropped his bag, caught her in his arms and pulled her against his chest. His lips slanted across hers in hungry possession and his tongue found the skirmish it was wanting. His hands roamed over the material of the yoga pants. It was thin, but he wished it were gone. He wanted her again, but now wasn't the time. He pulled back with a soft groan of frustration. "You're so tempting Dani." He pressed his forehead to hers.

"Now is not the time, but I want you so badly right now." He took her hand and placed it over the fly of his pants. He let her stroke him a few times then stilled her hand. "Not with your son in the yard, but if I could I would." He turned, pressed her into the wall and lifted her so her legs were around his waist. "Right here in the foyer, right against the wall." He thrust against her and she gasped. He kissed her throat and he palmed her breast through the cami she wore. He stopped and let her slide down his length. He smiled down at her. "Can't though, need to get a few things done." He kissed her nose, grabbed his bag and then ran up the stairs.

Dani stood there struggling for breath, he mind on sex, her body on fire for the second time that morning as Nico Careles walked away. She was a giant frayed nerve. "Need to get a few things done…" she mumbled as she straightened herself up. She glared up the stairs. "Damn you Nico what the hell are you doing to me?" She took another breath and did a relaxation exercise as she waited for Nico to come back down the stairs. It wasn't long of a wait.

He came down in a pair of dark jeans and a black t shirt and she thought he looked even sexier than before. He gave her a quick kiss, checked on Ray Jay's progress and then headed out the door with a promise that he would be back soon.

Nico had already texted Ronnie with the instructions and after he stopped by the bank, he drove to the local park and pulled in beneath a tree. He checked his email and returned a few. He dialed a number from memory hit send and then end, then redialed and hit send once again only to cancel to call when it rang twice. He realized his hand was shaking and let the phone drop to his lap. He tapped his fingers on his knee and took a long, deep breath. He had to do this. Then, with determination he picked up the phone, redialed and waited.

After four rings the call went to voicemail. He wasn't sure if he was relieved or disappointed.

"This is Gabrielle, obviously I'm not available right now, but you can leave a message and I'll try to get back with you as soon as I can. If you have this number it means I trust you, so don't disappoint me."

Nico took a deep breath. "It's me. You know how to reach me and I'm not sure if you need anything, but if you or Juliette need anything at all let me know and I'll be there. God, I don't know what to say…just let me know you're alright." He disconnected and let his head fall back onto the seat. He'd managed so far to keep his mind off all things Pittman. Dani's willing body gave him something to focus on last night and her son's trouble with the police something this morning, but sitting alone in the car was not good and it was rushing up and overwhelming him. He took a breath and looked up when he spotted Ronnie's car.

He watched her get out. She was almost as tall as he was and muscular with curves where women should have them. Her skin was very dark and heavily tattooed and she wore her hair short and natural. Today she was wearing tight jeans and black knee high boots with an army green jacket. She always carried a weapon and she usually had more than one. She crossed from her car to Nico's with an envelope in her hand and slid into the passenger seat.

"You get anything?"

"Enough." She handed him the envelope. "The kid and his brother have both been in some trouble. Older brother has a couple of drug arrests, been in rehab twice, license revoked and an ag. assault that was dropped when the witness suddenly decided to forget who hit him in the face with the bat."

Nico grunted. "Happens sometimes you know."

"Yeah, when mommy and daddy buy the kid with a broken jaw a late model Mustang." She pulled Nicorette gum from her pocket and popped two pieces into her mouth.

Nico gave her a curious look.

"I'm trying to quit, okay. I promised Hugo."

Nico smiled. Hugo was her four yeahr old. "Pretty sure you're only supposed to chew one at a time."

"Yeah and I'm pretty sure if I don't put two in my mouth I'm not going to make it the next twenty minutes." She chomped on the gum loudly. "Now," she reached over the seat and flipped a couple of pages and pointed to something. "This Tyler kid, well he's a trip. Seems he has a couple little side business. He not only plays with the pot plants, he runs a bit of an RX racket too. Seems if you're looking for the Xanax, Klonopin or Ritalin, he's your go to guy. He has two therapists, steals him mom's pills and has kids at school who sell him their entire month of pills."

"You get anything on the parents?" Nico was reading through the files.

"Mom's an addict, but she maintains. Dad drinks, but not excessively. He has a few girlfriends, mom knows about them and she's screwing her yoga instructor." Ronnie shrugged. "They spoil the kids and think everything the kids do is someone else's fault." She snorted. "Nothing new for this shitty piece of New York," she pulled a face and sneered, "I swear me and Angie, we're going to keep raising Hugo in the city; nothing good comes from all this shit out here. It's like you move out here and you lose your soul."

Nico shook his head. "There's still good people out here Ronnie. Just like there are still assholes in the city. Did you get the other stuff I asked for?"

She nodded. "Yeahh, they're in the trunk, and Raj told me to tell you to be careful and not expect much the first yeahr since you're moving them so soon."

"I know. Pop your trunk and I'll get them." He reached over Ronnie and opened his glove box to retrieve the bank envelopes. He handed her both. "Make sure Raj gets his and the other is yours, extra for the rush and in case I call again in the next day or so."

She nodded and slid both into the pocket of her jacket. "No problem. I'll help you move your shit." She hit the button on her key fob and slid from her car.

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Ray Jay had the holes dug and most of the weeds pulled by the time he got back. Dani was asleep on the couch when he peeked in through the French doors, which was actually just fine with him.

Ray Jay saw him and pulled the earbuds from his ears. "Dude, I was starting to think you weren't coming back."

Nico gently set down the bundles in his arms and checked the holes. "Looks good, I think they're about the right size."

"So, what are we putting in them?"

Nico gently pulled back the tarp that covered the plants and watched Ray Jay's face. He almost laughed.

"What are they?"

"Roses."

"No, they are sticks with leaves and that's about it man. I think the holes might be better."

"They aren't blooming right now, but trust me Ray Jay they're roses." Nico pulled his phone from his pocket and opened a photo file. He found the picture he was looking for and then turned the phone so Ray Jay could see it. "These are these same two rose bushes when they were in full bloom in the spring."

Ray Jay grabbed the phone and shook his head. The picture was of two bushes full of brownish roses, it was a color he'd never seen before and even he thought they were beautiful. "Wow, but they look so different."

"They do now Ray Jay, but they won't. Not if you take care of them." Nico leaned against the retaining wall behind him. "Right now they've been pruned back and dug up, but they're still young. They need to be replanted so they can put down good roots and by spring they'll be settled and you'll add some fertilizer and they'll grow. They'll get a few buds this spring and flower some, but it won't be until next yeahr that we see them look as good as that picture again. Next yeahr they'll be more mature. The root system will be deep and strong, they'll have made it through two winters and know what to expect. They'll bloom and one day, your mother will look out the window and all she'll see is roses, not what used to be."

Ray Jay cocked his head to the side and gave Nico a look with one eyebrow raised. "So this is like one of those SAT things isn't it? You're comparing me to the flowers right? Making your point; I'm not mature, need to put my roots deep at home, get all I can from here and grow up, learn from my mistakes, let it make me stronger and one day I'll be a man and mom will be proud…so, we're having a Hallmark moment right now right? You want me to hug you? We all bonded now?"

Nico laughed, pushed away from the wall and grabbed the shovel. "Put the plant in the dirt smart ass."

Ray Jay took the shovel. "Hey, you gotta show me how or those roses are only going to make me bleed."

Nico walked Ray Jay through the steps, doing it side by side with him with the one plant, while Ray Jay did it with the other. In ten minutes both rose bushes were in the ground and watered. Ray Jay was asking about fertilizer and Nico was explaining that no, not during planting but in spring and he'd be sure to help Ray Jay keep the roses alive. Ray Jay was yawning when Nico was done with his lecture. He helped Nico put the tools in the garage and then he stopped before heading into the house.

"Hang on a sec." Ray Jay stopped with his hand on the door knob. "Look, I don't know you and all, but you've been pretty cool today. You really helped mom out and I know I'm a total jack-off teenager and you didn't really treat like one, so thanks and even though the whole flower object lesson thing was a little lame, I'll still give you points for doing it because mom will really like the roses and she will think of it exactly like you said because, well she is that way. So, yeah…that's all I wanted to say."

Nico nodded and stepped close to Ray Jay, boxing him against the door as he invaded his space. His face was suddenly serious. "I want you to remember one thing Ray Jay." His voice was a low, menacing growl. "I can be your friend, or I can be something entirely different. The choice is yours, but I am always on your mother's side." He stepped around Ray Jay, opened the door and walked into the house.

Ray Jay stood there for one second, shook his head, smiled then said quietly, "Scary, cool, but scary." He went inside and shut the door. He picked up his phone and hit a button. "Siri, remind me to stay on Nico's good side."


	6. Phone Calls and the Gym

**_NOTE:_**Shh, this is getting posted at lunch from Chipolte because I actually had a meeting that got cancelled today and I didn't tell them to open up my schedule, it will be our little secret. This chapter was one very long chapter that I split, when I say very long I mean it. So, I will post the next one (which has the smut) later, maybe tonight or tomorrow. I still have to edit it some. I could wait to post, but I'd rather post when I have stuff finished than just post once a week because eventually, I'll be done and sad.

Oh, and WOW, I was wrong about my Law of Diminishing Reviews, LOL. You just took a break or something, because you guys blew my inbox up!

Also, like I said, I'll post without a review, so I'm not soliciting for a review. I write because there's a story in my head. You read it or you don't, though I appreciate that you do. I appreciate reviews, especially those that are well thought out, even if you don't like it. Heck, if you don't like something, or think I screwed up PLEASE call me on it. I'm all for adult discussion, but lets keep it adult. Don't just dislike my characters because they "sound stupid". ;)

My son had fun last night and then he and his friends came here and hung out in my family room all night playing Xbox, which is where they usually end up. Most weekends, the family room looks like a frat house covered in pizza boxes and Mt. Dew cans and all available furniture is covered in teenage boy. Just so you know, teenaged boys when grouped together SMELL, if you ever have that many in your house, do as I do, stock up on the Febreeze...

Anyway, I hope you enjoy the story.

* * *

**Phone Calls and the Gym**

Nico washed his hands in the kitchen sink and then filled a glass with water from the bottle in the fridge. Ray Jay grabbed a bottle of water and checked on his mom.

"She's sleeping." Ray Jay looked over to Nico. "You're probably tired too."

Nico nodded. "Yes, I need to head home soon and shower, try to take a nap before I have a meeting back at the office this afternoon. Your mom's supposed to be there too; we just got the email."

"You could crash here, I know mom wouldn't care." He shrugged. "If it's a clothes thing, we can wash your other stuff, or whatever."

Nico gave the kid an even look and then shook his head. "I need to go. I have a few things to do, but I appreciate it." He finished his water and put the glass in the sink. "I left my bag upstairs though. Be right back."

Ray Jay shook his head, "I'm heading up, I'm crashing myself." Then he ran up the stairs ahead of Nico and disappeared into his room.

Nico took a few seconds to collect his thoughts and then he slipped into the living room where Dani was sleeping on the couch. She was on her side with a throw pulled up over her. He knelt beside her and brushed hair from her forehead before kissing her cheek softly.

Her eyes drifted open and she smiled up at him as she stretched, reaching up to pull him down for a kiss. "Mm, Nico."

He let her pull him in and kissed her gently, but not deeply and he pulled back with a smile. "I need to go Dani."

She frowned and blinked. "What time is it?" She pushed herself upright.

He glanced to the clock. "Almost eleven thirty. We have a meeting at the office at four, you have an email about it. I need to head home to shower and maybe sleep some, since I didn't get any sleep last night." He gave her a wicked smile then.

"Not my fault." She glanced around. "Where's Ray Jay?"

Nico moved up to sit beside her. "He just went up to bed and I beg to differ by the way. You kissed me first."

She leaned her head against his chest. "You were so sad."

"You were the one crying over the fish."

"I really wasn't crying about a fish and Nico, I'm sorry."

He tipped her head back with his finger under her chin so he could see her face. "For what?"

"For whatever happened to you when you were little." She looked up at his face. "I opened to door to ask if both of you wanted something to drink and heard you talking to Ray Jay. I heard you telling him about how he should be grateful because other kids don't have certain things. I could tell it was from experience." She let her words trail off.

Nico watched Dani's face. There was no pity, just her usual look of concern and empathy and possibly something else he wasn't ready to acknowledge. He shrugged and dropped his hand. "It was a long time ago Dani." His voice a bit gruff and he cleared his throat. "There were people along the way who helped, people like Marcia Spanelli and I am the man I am today, because of every experience I went through."

Dani took his hand and pressed a kiss to it before giving him a wry smile. "I think you've had some good therapy in the past."

Nico laughed and pulled to a stand, "No, but I've been around a good therapist for a while and I've picked up thing or two."

She stood and slid into his arms. She looked up at him. "Yeah, like what?"

"Mainly, the therapist…" He captured her lips and kissed her breathless while holding her head completely still. He had absolute control. He pulled at her bottom lip gently and battled with her tongue. His hands framed her face and massaged her head. He slipped a knee between her legs and applied pressure until he heard her moan soft and low in her throat and he smiled as he released her lips.

She panted and gripped his t-shirt. Her dazed, hooded eyes struggled to focus and he smiled down at her.

"Dani…god, you're so distracting." He slid his knee from between hers. "This we will finish I promise, but I want you to do something for me for later."

She shook her head. "Nico, you keep doing this to me and I'm going to spontaneously combust."

He chuckled and kissed her again, quick, but full on the lips then slid his mouth to her ear to whisper, "You can't combust if you're soaking wet Danielle."

She shoved his shoulder with a growl and he laughed harder. She glared and put a hand on her hip as she looked up at him in frustration. "What do you want me to do?"

Nico looked at her and wished he could take her clothes off and do exactly what they both wanted right now, because he needed her at least as much as she needed him. "Have dinner with me tonight?"

Her eyebrows drew up. "That's it, that's what you want me to do?" She gave him an odd look. "Of course I'll have dinner with you." She smiled at him.

His grin slid turned sly.

"Uh, oh…"

"That's not my request." He started to move toward the stairs. "I need to grab my bag."

She followed him up the stairs. "Nico, what game are you playing? What do you want?"

Once in her room she noticed that her lingerie drawers were open and her panties were gone; every pair. He jaw dropped and she turned and glared at him. "Careles, what the hell?" She hissed at him as she shut her door.

He smiled, patted his bulging duffle bag and slung it over his shoulder. "I already have what I want Dani." He stalked across the room and pulled her hard against his chest. "And if you wouldn't mind wearing a skirt…mmm, and boots would be nice, but I'm not that picky, because you in a bra and heels without your panties..." His eyes slid shut and he groaned before he opened his eyes. "Never mind, either or works, but a skirt," He gazed down at her, his eyes a darker shade than usual, "definitely a skirt."

Dani stood there her jaw moving, mind reeling, but no words coming out of her mouth. She was trying to process exactly how she felt and there was a lot to process. The logical part of her brain told her she should feel violated, but instead her blood was boiling through her veins for other reasons. Heat settled low in her belly and was tension coiled tight in her gut. When Nico brushed a finger over her nipple she gasped and her entire body shook. Tears of frustration gathered in her eyes and she gasped his name desperately, "Nico…"

"Shit Dani," he growled while he watched her face. "You're going to be the death of me," he let his hand trail over her the skin that her top exposed. His knuckles traced over her shoulders and then he moved behind her and pressed against her from behind her. His cock dug into the curve of her ass. "I swear, where the hell have you been hiding this?" His hands cupped her breasts and his mouth found the curve of her neck and kissed a path to her ear. "So much passion, so much unmet need…" He slid one hand down to cup her through her pants. He applied just enough pressure to make her gasp. "There's still so much you don't even know about yourself Danielle."

Her head fell back on his chest and she rubbed back against him shamelessly, she was lost in a fog of need.

There was a ring from Nico's pocket.

"Shit." Nico mumbled into her hair.

"It's okay." She stepped away from him, trying to pull herself together. She was shaking, still desperate and frustrated, but she wanted to try to get some perspective. Things were moving fast, even if it was purely physical it was starting to drown her. Maybe more sleep and some time away. He was right; she didn't know things about herself. Lovers were new territory. All those yeahrs with Ray had made her lazy. She had sex down to the economy of what worked for them both. It wasn't exciting, but it got the job done. She'd had so much fun with Matt, but she hadn't learned anything new about herself, she'd just reawakened things she'd forgotten. This, whatever it was with Nico, this was new territory completely.

Nico had hit the ignore button and then sent a quick text. Now he gave Dani an odd look. He held the phone up. "Gabrielle."

Hearing that was like taking a cold shower and she was again surprised by the strength of her reaction to this man. She straightened and stepped away. "Oh. I guess you'll have to call her back then." She moved to the door and opened it. "I'll see you at four and then at dinner like we planned." While she fully didn't appreciate Nico's history with Gabrielle, she knew Marshall's death couldn't be easy on her, so she looked up at him and took a breath. "Please, let Gabrielle and especially Juliette know how sorry I am."

Nico stepped to Dani and stopped. "Dani, it's not…" he ran a hand through his hair, "you of all people know things are complicated and I'm not about to explain all of it either, but I promised Marshall that I'd be sure Juliette and Gabrielle were taken care of if anything ever happened to him, especially if he ever did anything to himself." He looked her in the eye. "I told you how I let Gabrielle manipulate me and it's been a long time since I've felt anything for her Dani, but I have to honor my promise Marshall." He gently gripped Dani's chin when she looked away. "Don't. I need to make sure she's okay, that's all. I need to be sure Juliette isn't going to hurt herself. She's not strong like her mother." He shook his head. "I should have known she wasn't mine, she falls apart like Marshall does, she's fragile Dani. I know you understand that." He glanced away and took a breath to steady himself. His voice was still a bit uneven when he continued. "Even though she's not mine, I love her like a daughter."

Dani nodded and bit her lip. "It's okay Nico and I shouldn't be upset anyway. I mean…I'm not sure why I got upset, you've known Gabrielle forever and you're right about Juliette. I'm…we only…"

Nico interrupted her. "Dani stop it. I told you, last night wasn't going to be an anomaly. I promised you, if I had you once I would have you again." He raised an eyebrow, "because I knew you'd eat a croissant the way you did." He stepped closer and lowered his voice, "and then you went and completely blew my mind." He smiled. "You're a good friend and an excellent lover…and like I said, where this ends up..." He shrugged. "I wish I knew." He checked the clock on the dresser. "Dammit, I have to go. Dinner, dress and heels?" He asked still hopeful.

She smiled up at him almost shyly. "Yes." She blushed. "Oh my god Nico I still can't believe you stole all my panties…"

He pressed a kiss to her cheek and then dashed out the door and down the stairs with a huge smile on his face.

* * *

Nico drove for about thirty minutes and when he hit the Queensboro Bridge he had the car's system connect him with Gabrielle.

She answered this time. "Nico."

She'd been crying, sleeping, or she'd taken something that slurred her words; possibly all of the above. "How's Juliette?"

She sighed. "Not good, did you expect different? I admitted her two hours ago." She sniffed. "Nico, he left a note. There's one for you…I didn't open yours…I barely read the one I got…they arrived today. I… this…the divorce…it's all my fault…" She started sobbing.

Nico tapped his brakes when the cab in front of him suddenly braked. He cursed. "Gabby, I already knew this wasn't an accident…or at least had a pretty good idea." He took a breath. Marshall was already unstable, so this wasn't really her fault, even if she was the catalyst. "He was sick Gabby, it wasn't your fault. He was supposed to be in therapy, if he was a risk to himself he shouldn't have been flying a plane alone."

"God Nico, he wanted to take Juliette with him. He begged me to let her go and she kept begging me too, between the two of them it was horrible. She was so angry when I said no. She said she wanted to see you, but I was so pissed at you I wouldn't let her and then she told me she hated me." She stopped, sobbing into the phone. "She still hates me. Now, because she thinks could have saved him, but oh my god…she'd be…she'd be…" her words evaporated into sobs.

He could hear the phone shaking. He could hear all the 'what ifs' in her tears and he felt the cold grip of fear in his own gut. God, he hoped Marshall hadn't been planning that. Would he? Was he going to kill both of them? Punish Gabrielle and him for the rest of their lives and end Juliette's and his own misery once and for all?

He shook his head and his grip on the steering wheel became painful. He really didn't believe that, he couldn't. That wasn't the Marshall he knew. Not the one that he'd cried and laughed with at night while they took heavy enemy fire. Not the one, who came for him, saved his life and who he promised he'd repay. Not the Marshall he watched recover in the VA psych ward and he had promised to protect.

Maybe Juliette in the plane was to ensure he wouldn't hurt himself. Marshall had never done anything to hurt Juliette before. Nico didn't believe he ever would and couldn't stop believing that. Marshall loved his daughter, even if he had a suspicion she might be Nico's he'd always loved her. He'd always made Nico promise to take care of her if anything happened.

He cleared his throat. "Marshall wouldn't hurt Juliette; never."

"He would to hurt me, Nico. He hated me. He was mad enough at you…" Her vitriol was almost palpable. "I know I hated him."

Someone cut him off and he slammed his brakes, glancing in his rear mirror to be sure no one would rear end him. "You're hurting. You don't hate him and he didn't hate you, even after you left him. He wanted you back and he would have done anything to make that happen."

"Nico he was delusional again. He wasn't thinking straight, he was all over the place. High, low, seeing people who weren't there, come on, you saw him. He was still out there. He called me two days before to see if he could pick Juliette up and fly her out with him. He was out of his head."

"Did you tell someone?" He was off the bridge and a quick check of traffic showed it was pretty clear, so he stayed on E. 60th, intent to skirt around the park and down 7th. "Did you call his doctor?"

She snorted. "He fired that doctor two days after he started seeing him and then the next one and since he never told anyone he was suicidal there was no way they could forcibly hospitalize him."

She swallowed something, Nico's guess was booze, by the way her words slurred from time to time. Then she continued, "You know how good he was at pretending to be sane when he had to be. He could fool most people. Hell, he fooled us forever." She laughed almost hysterically.

Nico drove what must have been a full fifteen feet and stopped again, good progress for the time of day. He didn't care, he'd just as soon talk and drive. "Are you okay Gabby? Really?"

She laughed acidly, "Are you asking because you still care about me or some misguided loyalty to Marshall?"

There was a muffled sound on the end of the phone that he couldn't make out. Noise and voices, she was covering the phone. "Who's there with you Gabrielle?"

"People Nico, you know lawyers, friends, the type of people who are around when something like this happens. There's going to be a press release and I have to plan a memorial service and we have to decide what we want the world to know."

Nico made it through two lights and was sitting at the third. "What exactly are you planning on releasing to the public? Who is in charge of his estate?"

She laughed. "He has lawyers set up Nico, he wasn't an idiot. I don't have any control. He might have had a soft spot for me, but he was shrewd when it came to business. The only thing I'm allowed to do is plan his memorial and make my public statement as the mother of his child." She sobbed again. "You know I really am going to miss him. I did love him."

Nico took a right onto Central Park and barely missed an idiot on a bike that swerved between him and another car. "I know you did, so did I and I hated him in the next breath. I'm going to miss him too Gabby, but I need you to know that if Juliette needs anything all she needs to do is to call me. You know how I feel about her." His heart ached for the girl and he wished he could talk to her or see her, but it really wasn't his place. "I don't like how you used me, but I'm part of her life and I'll always be here for her."

"I know Nico and for what it's worth, I'm sorry for everything and about Marshall." She paused. "I'll update you about Juliette and thanks."

"Anytime." He heard the line disconnect and he sighed. The light changed and he turned left onto 7th. He checked the time. He was worked up, there was no way he would be able to sleep. He needed to work off some stress and since he'd left Dani back across the river that left the gym.

He rubbed the back of his neck and hoped Tommy or Keith was available to spar. He dialed the gym and waited for someone to pick up.

"Yeah." A gruff voice answered in a hurried rush.

"It's Careles, looking for a sparring partner in about thirty minutes, anyone available?" He glanced in his side mirror and changed lanes so he could make a left.

There was some rustling papers and then some muffled yelling, probably across they gym. Then the voice was back with a grunt. "We got three chicks here and then some kid at one-sixty, he's newer from some upstate gym and into the MMA thing. I don't know him, but they say he's good." There was more muffled chatter. "Hang on a sec."

Nico figured he'd take the kid if nothing else, that is if the kid was willing. A workout was a workout.

"The big chick says she'll take you, says she knows you. Let me hold the phone up, hang on."

"Nico, you looking for trouble already?"

He smiled. "Won't Angie kill me if I mess up your pretty face?"

"She was patching it up when we met." Ronnie snorted. "Besides, you can't touch me old man. What are you like, fifty?"

He could hear her laughing. "Watch it, I pay you, but if you're willing I need a partner."

"No one here on my level and I'm really bitchy with the nicotine withdrawal, so I'm all yours boss. See ya soon."

* * *

Nico sat on the bench panting, sweating, his ribs were sore and he had a hell of a bruise rising on the outside of his left thigh just above his knee. She had a vicious kick. He had his mouth guard between his teeth and he was watching Ronnie catch her breath across the ring.

She glanced up at him from rubbing at her side. "You…want another round?" She took a swig of water from a bottle and then spit it into a bucket beside her. She had a small cut above her eye, even with the headgear, Nico must have glanced a blow just below it. She rubbed at the eye, trying to keep the small trickle of blood out of it.

He checked the clock, they had the ring for another six minutes. He nodded. "I'm game. You?"

She smiled and fumbled her guard into her mouth and stood up. They both nodded to the kid reffing their match and then they were back circling each other.

Ronnie jabbed, landing a solid punch to Nico's left jaw.

He nodded. "Nice." Then he dropped so quick she couldn't react and swiped her legs out from under her. His legs were across her chest, one over her neck as he grabbed her left arm at the wrist and pulled back, straightening his body and twisting to apply pressure to the elbow and shoulder joints.

Ronnie rolled and curled, but Nico had the armbar locked in before she realized. She cursed and tapped on his arm.

He released her immediately, stood and reached down to grab her opposite shoulder to help her up.

She let him help her and then playfully shoved him. "Fucker." She rubbed her left arm clumsily with her gloves on. "That shit hurts." She pulled her headgear off with another curse.

He pulled his mouth guard out and took his headgear off as well. "That's why it works." He pulled the Velcro on his gloves with his teeth and pulled them off as they left the ring. He pointed to a bench. "Sit, let me look at it."

"Aw, you feel bad now?" She smirked up at him, but sat down and undid her own gloves.

"Only if I damaged you enough that you can't do your job." He pressed over her shoulder. "And I don't like angry ER nurses coming after me."

"Angie's a big pussy cat, shit watch it." She flinched when he hit a sensitive spot.

"Cats have claws." Nico continued his examination, moving down the shoulder to her elbow. "I know, I have one."

She looked up at him. "Really?" That surprised her some. "Huh, so do I pass inspection doc?" She rolled her head on her neck and shrugged her shoulders, it was tender, and she'd be sore, but she'd had worse.

Nico touched a scar on her shoulder; he knew she'd never been wounded in the military. "Forty-five?"

She nodded. "Grew up in a bad neighborhood in Chitown, I have a few stab wounds I could show you too." She turned so he could see the poorly covered up gang tattoo on her right bicep easier. "Joined at twelve because it was the thing to do, didn't really know how much I liked girls then." She shrugged. "It's hard being half Puerto Rican and half black to begin with in an all PR hood, not liking cock didn't make me any more popular." Her eyes took on a faraway look. "I learned to fight dirty and I learned to pretend and blend."

Most of the people Nico employed had similar backgrounds and he had read her file before he hired her, but paper didn't give you the entire story. "You learned to survive. That's why you're good at what you do now." He leaned his shoulder into hers as he sat beside her. He pointed to the army tattoo on her left arm. "When did you join up?"

She smiled. "I left Chicago right after high school, enlisted and it was the best thing I ever did. Learned some cool shit, like how to handle weapons and explosives and I'm good with languages. I mean, being bilingual helps, but I have a knack for it even if I did barely pass high school."

Nico straightened his leg out slowly, his knee was tight.

Ronnie noticed and with a smirk she asked, "Sore boss?" She reached over and squeezed the knee. "Might want to ice it."

He chuckled and stood up. "I appreciate the work out and I'm glad you found the club." Ronnie had been on the payroll for over a year, but he'd been using her more since he'd forced Tony into retirement. That gave her a few more perks. "I hope to see you here again."

She glanced around. "I like the vibe and the place is clean. I'll be back."

"Good. Learn that armbar, you might need it one day, it's all about leverage so you don't have to be bigger than your opponent." He headed to the locker room ignoring the twinge in his knee. He was not going to limp, at least not in front of her.


	7. Leverage

**_NOTE:_**Well, this update didn't happen as soon as it was supposed to. This week turned to shit, I won't go into too much detail because you really don't need it, but like I've said. I'm an NP, I do rural healthcare. That means I have sick patients and sometimes they get really sick...sometimes they don't make it. That happens and for any of you in healthcare you know we have "rules" and one of them is the rule of 3. IF something bad happens, it happens in groups of 3s. Well, this was my week. So, hospital admissions, hospice, deaths...sucks.

PLUS we have a community outbreak of viral meningitis in the middle school which means any kid with a wisp of a headache, fever, or fart stuck sideways has been in to be checked out "Just in case they have that spiny-mighty-jesus." (ACTUAL QUOTE of the week).

Okay, so anyway the story moves on. Thanks for the reading and reviews. I really appreciate them all, especially this week because they did make me smile when I really wanted to cry. Mistakes my own...probably plenty this week.

A special shout out to LatteLady. If you haven't already read her story, Fear of Flying, go read it. I've read it twice now and it's worth it. She has forever ruined my ability to write an apartment for Nico(trust me I tried)-I'll end up sounding hollow or plagiarizing accidentally- and besides, hers is perfect, so I bow before the master. If you want to know what I mean: Go read...now, come back when you're done.

* * *

**Leverage**

Dani fussed with her skirt, smoothed it down self-consciously and tried to suppress the little shiver that shook her. She kept telling herself that there wasn't any way anyone would know her secret, but it didn't feel that way. She took a breath and entered the Hawk's complex like usual. She headed straight toward the conference room and straight into Matt.

He grabbed her arm to steady her. "Hey." He eyed her from head to toe, taking in her outfit. She wore a tight black pencil skirt paired with a turquoise and black patterned silk blouse that showed off an ample amount of her cleavage. Her hair was up and she wore a pair of 'fuck me heels' that went beyond her usual pair. He whistled. "Wow, you have a date later?"

"Huh?" She glanced past him, distractedly.

"You're dressed to kill Dani." He waved a hand around the office. "Bit much for an emergency Monday afternoon meeting." He raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms. "Not that it's any of my business."

"Your right it's not." She looked up at him evenly. She was still a bit upset that he blew her off the other night when she'd really needed him. "I'm having dinner with a friend. That's all."

"Must be some friend," he saw Nico come in talking with Coach and nodded at them when Coach waved him over. "Hope you have a good time then, Coach wants me."

"By all means…" Dani stepped aside and heard Nico's voice just then.

"Donnally." Nico stopped just behind Dani.

She could feel the heat from his body and her pulse sped up, she glanced somewhat nervously over her shoulder. She felt a bit trapped between the two men. She could feel tension flow between them, something she had sensed before, but not quite at the same level.

"Nico." Matt gave Nico a long glance. There was something about the way he standing by Dani, the way he positioned himself. He wasn't sure, but, "Is there something I should know?"

Nico cocked his head to side and gave Matt a sly smile. He'd give Matt credit, the man wasn't an idiot. "No, but have you seen that reporter since the other night?"

"Which reporter, Nico?" Matt asked as he crossed his arms with an icy glare. "Do you have anything you want to say to me?"

"No, I actually don't." He motioned over his shoulder, "but Purnell and Griffen are getting antsy waiting on you."

Matt finally acknowledged the coach and GM. He bent to Dani, "You look really nice Dani." He then brushed past Nico, his shoulder brushed roughly against the other man's as he glared.

Nico bit back a grunt when his knee twisted.

Dani turned and watched him go and then looked up at Nico. "Will you two turn back the testosterone some?" She glanced from Nico and then to Matt's retreating form and back. "Makes me feel like a bone being circled by two starving dogs."

Nico's smile was wolfish, "More like a juicy piece of meat." He stepped back and motioned toward the conference room. He let Dani take a few steps, watching her move ahead of him. His voice was low and growly when he added. "And, I'm ravenous…"

Dani knew she was flushed when she found a seat in at the table. Nico took his usual spot leaning against the wall by the door. She tried to look casual, but she was struggling. There was a file folder on the table and she opened it when things were mentioned. There were several things discussed. Mostly, it was about Pittman. His body was found and there would be an official announcement. It was still listed as an accident, she glanced at Nico and he shook his head. There would be a memorial service, the team would observe a special moment of silence at the next game and they would be issued black arm bands the rest of the yeahr. Griffen talked about a special fund that would be set up for mental health issues in Pittman's name, he wanted Dani's help with it.

She was thrilled to help and nodded. There would be no practice on the day of the funeral service so that the team could attend. There was some discussion about TK, but he had agreed to treatment now and Dani was pretty sure he would see it through. A few more odds and ends were brought up and Dani announced that if anyone needed to talk therapy sessions could be scheduled. Purnell would announce it in the morning to the team.

Griffen thanked everyone for coming in and before he ended the meeting, he officially announced that Matt was now the Assistant GM and they would be hiring a new head trainer. Then about an hour and fifteen minutes after it started, the meeting was over.

Dani stayed in her seat longer than she needed pretending to check messages on her phone first and then looking through the folder. She had butterflies in her gut. She looked up to realize that it was just her and Nico in the room. He was still leaning against the wall watching her. She took in his blue shirt, dark pants and jacket. He looked sexy as usual and she felt the heat of his gaze like a physical force.

"You avoiding me?" He asked pushing away from the wall gracefully.

She shook her head. "That's impossible," she glanced around making sure there wasn't anyone close by, "I can't get you out of my head."

He leaned a hip on the table a few seats away and watched her. She sat back in her chair and crossed her legs. "I like your hair up, it shows off your neck." He held out his hand. "I promised you dinner, even after the drive we may have to get a drink, reservations aren't until seven thirty. "

She took Nico's hand and even that small touch sent a thrill through her body. She gave him a look. "If we're driving to the city, how fast do you think we're getting there this time of day?"

He smiled, "I said might Dani, I didn't say we would. I left enough time in there so we could get there if traffic was bad or this meeting or ran over." He guided her from the room and then past the foyer toward the parking lot. "Of course there was always a possibility that something else might sidetrack us." He had purposely parked in the one place he knew of where the security cameras didn't have a clear view and now he used it to his advantage.

He reached for Dani's hand and pulled her against him, spun and pressed her against the cement column. One of his hands slid behind her head, the other found her hip, "I've wanted to touch you since I saw you." He kissed her then, much more gently than he had all day. A slow seductive kiss meant to kindle and spark, not immediately burn. The hand on her hip slid down to her knee and found smooth skin and then skimmed under her skirt and up. He ignored her when she made a protesting sound, but deepened the kiss as his hand traveled up the outside of her thigh, pulling the tight skirt with it.

Dani wanted him to stop, but desperately needed him to keep going. She didn't like the fact that she was about to be quite exposed in the Hawks parking lot in front of anyone who might walk or drive by, but damn just a few more inches higher and to left and she thought she could cum. She'd been so on edge all day, that's all it would take. Nico's hand brushed along her hip and then across her ass and then he was smoothing her skirt back down and stepping away.

Dani stumbled and her legs were shook. She gripped his forearms dazed. "Nico…didn't you trust me?" she gazed at him, "I…you have to stop doing this to me."

"I just had to touch you." He let her find her balance. "You are just so sexy Danielle." He offered her one arm, turned and unlocked the car. He helped her in and then got in the other side. "You still trust me?"

He watched her nod and then started the car. "Good, because I promise I'll make it up to you." he flashed her a huge smile and headed out of the parking lot.

Dani watched the landscape go by in silence for ten minutes. She had a million questions, but she had no idea where to start. She knew about twenty things about the man beside her. "So," she looked over at him, "any chance you'll actually tell me something about yourself?"

Nico glanced at her. "You know more about me than most people."

She snorted. "I doubt that."

"Really, you do."

"What's your favorite color?"

"Don't have one."

"Who doesn't have a favorite color?"

"Me. I can't pick one. Today it might be that aquamarine in your blouse because it brings out the brown in your eyes or the red of your shoes because it makes your entire outfit pop. Yesterday, it was the auburn of your hair as it lay across my chest." He looked over at her. "That pink coloring your cheeks right now; that is high on the top of my list at the moment."

She pressed the backs of her hands to her cheeks and then fanned herself. "Okay, no favorite color then." She went back to looking out the window.

"My turn then?"

"What?"

"You asked a question, and got an answer, do I get one now?" He smirked.

Oh god, she was worried, but if he answered a question for every one she answered she figured it would be worth it. "Sounds fair enough."

"Why'd you leave Donnally?" He watched the road, but glanced at her from the corner of his eye to watch her reaction. He was surprised it was as steady as it was.

She took a breath. She'd been expecting this question at some point. "How do you know I left him, maybe he's the one that left me."

Nico narrowed his eyes and cocked a brow and then shook his head. "I think it was mutual, but you pulled out first." He looked over at her quickly now, caught the look on her face and knew he was right. "So why?"

Dani shifted in her seat so she could face Nico better. She sighed. "It's complicated, but we're at different places in life. He wants to start a family and I've raised mine already is the biggest part of it. Neither of us was willing to give that up." She shook her head. "I don't want to start over with diapers, midnight feeding, leaking boobs and mommy playgroups. My dream has been my career and I put it on hold once for a family; now it's just starting to get momentum." Dani looked over to Nico, nervousness rolling in her belly. "I didn't think it was fair for someone I loved to give up on their dream of holding a baby of their own, so I had to let him go."

Nico knew Dani cared about Matt, probably loved him. Hearing it didn't change anything for him. What hearing Dani's explanation did was make him respect her even more. He reached for her hand and squeezed it. "Thanks for telling me."

Her forehead drew together in confusion. "It doesn't bother you? Talking about the last man I slept with?"

Nico shot her a look. "Well, we don't have to discuss him that way." He signaled and took a turn. "I knew you were sleeping with him, I knew you had, probably are still having some feelings for him and like I said, I was pretty sure you were the one who initiated the break up. I was wondering why. I needed to know it wasn't because he mistreated you. If it was, I was going to hurt him."

Dani giggled. "No, he never hurt me; he was always quite the gentleman." She gave him a look. "Nothing like you at all."

They were stopped at a light so he turned to look at her, "What are you saying Dani?" His voice had dropped low and his hand found Dani's knee and massaged lightly. "Am I inappropriate?"

She bit her lip and swallowed. "Yes." Her voice was breathy.

He moved forward about six cars and the light was red again. His hand moved up her leg, fingers finding the warm flesh between her thighs as her legs parted for him and her breath caught. "Should I stop?" His eyes were on hers.

She shook her head, one hand gripped the arm rest on the door, the other pulling her skirt up for him. "Please…" she was begging and she knew it, but she didn't care. She could feel the slickness between her legs making her skirt damp.

The cars in front of him moved and he did to. Both the car and his fingers this time, the car through the light and his fingers toward their goal, he could feel Dani's moisture even though he was still inches from her slit. "So wet baby." He straightened one finger and just brushed her clit.

She made a strangled sound in her throat and stiffened at the sensation. "Oh god." Her eyes were wide, panicked and she stared at Nico as he drove with one of his hands between her legs, she was centered on that single sensation and she could never remember being so focused before. "Nico…" she panted, "Please…god…please…" sweat beaded on her lip and she knew she was close.

He smiled at her and turned into a parking lot. He was losing focus on the road. He slammed the car into park and pulled his hand from under her skirt.

Tears of frustration were on her lashes and she sobbed. "Please, don't….don't…" she shook her head and looked at him in desperation.

He undid his seatbelt and leaned over to kiss her, she clung to him, her hands grabbing his hair and shoulders, anything she could to get him closer.

He unhooked her seatbelt and turned her in the seat so she was facing him with her back against the door. His windows were tinted and it was dark so he wasn't worried about being seen. He pushed her skirt up until he could see her. He pulled her shoes off and then ordered, "Put your left foot on my shoulder Dani."

She stared at him, still dazed, but she did what he asked. It was tight in the confines of the car and it wasn't comfortable with her right foot on the floor and her left on his shoulder since that left her back pressed against the door, but at this point she was desperate. If he made her cum she'd do anything right now. She squirmed her ass against the seat and reached for him. "Nico, my god please do something…"

He slid two fingers slowly inside her, watching her body contract around them as she exploded immediately. He was rock hard already, but he tightened even more watching her cum around his fingers. He bit back a moan.

"Yes, oh god…" Dani thrashed under him, almost completely out of control.

He reached over and pressed his other hand down low on her belly to still her. "Dani, look at me." He didn't move, just waited until she stilled. When she opened her eyes and looked at him he smiled at her. "Hey, there you are. Are you alright?"

She nodded, "Nico, my god." She was still quivering around him. "THAT has NEVER happened before."

He moved his fingers and pressed down with his other hand, using thumb to find her clit. "Oh Dani, you aren't done yet either baby." He found his rhythm and curled the two fingers inside upward finding just the right spot and soon he had Dani arching upward.

This time she felt it building and moved with it. She was still surprised she came as quickly as she did right after the last one, but after being worked up all day she didn't care. Her body was strung so tight she thought she might shatter. She felt so wanton writhing on Nico's seat and when it finally hit her she gasped with her head pressed against the window and she exploded with a low moan, and then suddenly it was too much.

She couldn't handle Nico touching her anymore and reached down to push his hand away. "Holy shit." She was panting, leg still on his shoulder as he withdrew his hand, her eyes on his. She watched his smug expression and she couldn't help but think he earned it. Her legs were shaking, her brain was foggy, she was sure her makeup was ruined, her hair a total disaster and she didn't care.

Nico smiled at her. God, what he wouldn't do to bury himself inside her right now, bend her over the hood of the car and pull up her skirt. He dropped his head to the seat and closed his eyes, letting the little fantasy play on the backs of his eyelids while he readjusted himself and settled himself back behind the wheel. He took a breath and then sat up and helped Dani reposition herself. He kissed her. "You feel any better?" He rested his forehead to hers.

"I don't feel like I'm going to burn up when you touch me right now." She took a deep breath and put her palm to his cheek. "What am I going to do with you Mr. Careles? "

"You're going to let me make love to you and then order room service, because Dr. Santino, there is no way I'm going to make it through dinner without eating you first." He turned his mouth and pressed a kiss to her palm. "Can you handle that Dani?"

She kissed him and nodded. "Yes."

First, he called and cancelled his reservation at the restaurant, apologizing in such a charming and graceful way that Dani was sure he would not only, never be snubbed when he called again, but he would probably be given a choice table. Then he put the car in gear and pulled back onto the road.

"Where are we going?" Not that Dani cared too much. She'd just about screwed the man in his car and earlier considered a public rest room. If he stopped at a Red Roof Inn, she wouldn't bat and eye.

"The Marriott Marquis, the Hawks keep a suite there and I'm authorized to use it." He glanced at her.

"Don't you live in the city?" She didn't know why it bothered her that he wasn't taking her to his place, but it was.

He nodded. "Yes, but I promised you food after I make love to you and there's nothing but three day old Thai in my fridge right now."

She screwed up her nose and chuckled. "In that case, I'll take the Marriott."

"I figured you might." He reached for her hand and she let him take it, his thumb traced over her knuckles lightly.

It was quiet for a minute or two and then Dani asked, "So, can I ask another question?"

He groaned. "Curiosity, it killed more than cats Danielle."

"You're quite the puzzle Nico and I like puzzles, and besides, you'll either answer it or completely ignore it like usual, but I'm going to ask."

He made a right and nodded. "Okay, since you already know I'll answer or avoid, go ahead."

"Are you really as big, bad and scary as you pretend you are?" She bit the tip of one of her fingernails.

Nico did a double take. "I don't pretend Dani." He looked at the road and then back to her.

"You're not that scary Nico, I think you're bark might be worse than your bite." She gave him an even look as he pulled them into the parking garage.

He was quiet while he drove through the garage to the reserved lot. He took a ticket and pulled in. Once he had the car parked, he turned off the ignition and answered her.

"Don't think that because you haven't seen me bite that I can't or I won't." He undid his seatbelt and opened his door. He walked around and opened Dani's door, helped her out and then shut the door. He pressed her back against the car. His lean length was full against her curves. "The threat is usually all I need to keep the violence in check." His voice was a warm whisper against her ear. "I'm not always proud of it, but trust me; my reputation has been well earned and just because I haven't killed anyone recently, doesn't mean I've lost the ability to do it."

Dani shifted uneasily. "I…uh see."

He smiled against her ear. "You said that yesterday." He kissed down her neck. "Tell me something Danielle?" He kissed across her collarbone and up to her chin. "Have I earned my reputation with you?"

She pulled back to focus on his face. "Which one?"

He laughed. "Do I have more than one?" He rolled her nipple.

She shook her head confused and moaned when he pulled her nipple and nipped at her ear.

"The reputation that I'm good in bed, that I can make a woman wet by looking at her from across a room. Make her scream my name over and over," he slid an arm around her shoulder and started walking her toward the elevator. "I've heard those before." His eyebrow shot up. "You know…around."

She laughed at him then. "You are incorrigible."

"That I am." He pulled a key card from his wallet and used it at the elevator, leaning heavy against the wall of the elevator while they waited. His pace was slower once they got to the thirty-first floor and he led them to the room.

The suite was modest, just two rooms, but it was very spacious and well appointed. There was wine and a well appointed mini-bar. Nico opened the red to let it breathe while Dani checked out the room.

"There's not much of a view, this is more of crash and burn room, than a court and sign room." He watched the confusion on Dani's face as he took off his jacket. "The Hawks don't use this for anyone they're trying to sign or impress, usually use it for someone they're trying to hide or family visiting from out town. You know parents coming in. It's nice, close to things, secure, clean and not too flashy. Sometimes, we hide the mistress or girlfriend here." He shrugged. "No, you aren't the mistress or girlfriend that way."

She laughed. "I know what you mean." She walked around the room a bit nervously. She finally sat on the couch and picked up a book from the cocktail table. It was a well-read paperback of modern poets. She slid it back to the table.

"Here," Nico held a glass of wine as he sat beside her, putting his left leg up on the cocktail table. He noticed the book. "Do you like poetry?"

She sipped the wine and sighed, it was excellent and she said so. "Of course, but I don't know modern poets very well though."

He smiled and held up his wine glass. "This is one of my favorite reds, so I'm glad you like it." He drank a bit more, before he put his glass down. He took Dani's glass from her as well. "I'm impatient." He leaned over her, laying her down on the couch and pressing a kiss to her chest. He looked up at her. "I need you Dani." He slid to the floor, pushing her skirt up as he went. "I didn't get what I wanted last night." He pressed a kiss to her knee and, gently shoving them apart, kissing the inside of each with a soft growl as her skirt rode higher, kissing skin as he revealed it.

Dani stopped him. "Nico, wait." She pushed him back.

"Dani." His voice was a growled warning.

She stood and undid the zipper on skirt and with a quick tug she had it down her hips.

He smiled from the floor. "Much better, before you sit, take off your blouse."

She was already undoing the buttons though and she had it off and stood in her bra and heels in seconds. She was breathless already.

Nico pulled a throw pillow from the couch to cushion his knee and then sat back on his heels so he could look up at her. "I pictured you like this all day." His hands ran up her legs from her calves to her hips and he urged her back to sit on the couch. "You're so beautiful." He leaned up and captured her lips. Soft and gently he kissed her again. He slowly let the kiss build, keeping his hands on her knees, his fingertips, just tracing circles on the sensitive skin of her inner thighs.

Instinctively, her legs were drifting open for him as his fingers moved higher. He pulled back and kissed down her neck, letting his fingers skim over her hip bones so that she groaned in frustration at him. His fingers moved up her sides to her breasts and he took his time teasing her nipples to firm peaks through the lace of her bra. It was a deliciously sexy black and red lace number that barely covered her nipples, and when he was done playing he caught her nipples with his teeth and pulled upward until they weren't covered by the bra at all.

"Much better." He smiled and pinched at the sensitive nubs. Dani's moans went straight to his cock. "You look so sexy this way." He kissed her swollen lips. "You remember when I told you to stop looking so fuckable?" He waited for her to nod. He smiled. "Well, right now you couldn't if you tried." He cupped both her breasts and rubbed both nipples between his thumbs and the lace of her bra.

She gasped at the roughness of the texture. "You make me so hot Nico." She looked up at him already she was soaking wet again. "I've never felt this way before."

He kissed her. "Good," he kissed her neck and between her breasts, then her belly while his hands played with her breasts, and then finally his hands found her hips as he pulled her lower on the couch. His eyes were on hers and he watched her face as he spread her and bent his head to taste her fully for the first time.

Dani watched his tongue touch her and then all thoughts were gone in a swirl of sensation. She pressed her head back into the plush couch with a low moan and spread her legs wide as her hands sank into his hair. "Yess…god…please…" The hot pressure of his tongue was perfect, at least she thought so until he started flicking and sucking her clit and then she thought she would die from the pleasure. She gasped and moaned as he teased her. He thrust his tongue inside and then a long slow swipe over her and she shuddered, but she didn't cum. She hovered on the edge, danced around it and begged for it to end. "Nico…please…"

He smiled against her and pulled back, his tongue taking lazy swipes at her clit. "What's wrong Dani?' He gently bit the inside of her left thigh and she moaned so deep in her throat he almost gave in on pure principle. Instead, he licked over the small hurt and back to her clit while he waited for her answer.

She grabbed his hair and pulled to stop him. "You're teasing me, you sadistic, evil man." She moaned when he fingered her instead. "Yessss."

"Do you want to see that side of me Dani?" He loved the desperate look on her face and he added a second finger to her tight heat. "Because, I can be very sadistic." He pulled his fingers out and traced them lightly over her clit, teasing her. He gauged her reaction and then slid his fingers back inside, this time angling them so they found the spot...

"Nico," She arched up with a loud gasp.

"Now, I'll make you cum Dani…" He bent his head to her clit and massaged her from the inside at the same time. He dragged his teeth over her clit just a bit rough, knowing it would make it more sensitive. Then he licked the hurt and moved his fingers over the sensitive spot inside, alternating the pressure and the motion as he kept the friction on her clit steady.

"Nico…oh, oh…" She pressed her heels into the carpet and she didn't know what was going on. Every time she thought she'd felt everything, he added another sensation. "What, oh…oh…" She pressed her head into the couch and tried to hold on.

Nico lifted his head. "Let go Dani, just let go." He pulled her clit back into his mouth, sucking and licking, his fingers pressing upward.

Dani couldn't control it and she had to let go, it was so intense. Her body was fire one second and then she was flying. Only Nico wasn't letting up even though she sobbed for him to stop and the heat built in her belly so fast it she was cumming again in minutes, "Please, no…Nico…" She wasn't sure she could tolerate him touching her anymore. She was so sensitive it was almost painful. She pushed him away, but he held her hip firmly.

He continued to lick and lap at her and he smiled against her, but didn't stop. He wasn't quite done. She was quivering around his fingers, her body still pulsing.

"Nico, please…god…" Her head thrashed side to side as she begged him to stop and pushed at his head.

She had him rock hard and he wanted her now, but he knew he could make her cum again. He knew she thought she wanted him to stop, but her body was close, it wouldn't take much more. His fingers applied just the right pressure, his tongue pressed and swirled over her clit her and then the third orgasm hit her hard.

She came with a shuddering gasp, as her body tightened around his fingers and drew them inside. Nico slowed the thrust of his fingers as he withdrew them. His tongue caressed her softly in long, lazy swipes as she came down from her orgasm. His hands traced over her legs in slow, calming strokes as he smiled up at her.

Her legs were trembling and she struggling to think, but the man between her legs was smiling at her like a fool. She rested a hand on his cheek and panted, struggling to catch her breath and sort out her emotions. Then suddenly, she was being moved, she was on her back on the couch and he was beside her on his side, his hip by hers as he stared down at her.

He cleared the hair from her face, smoothing it back. "Now," He smiled, "now you can call me sadistic."

She took a deep, wavering breath. "Yes, that qualifies…bastard." She gave him a lopsided grin and pushed hair from his forehead. "You look like a naughty boy like that." She closed her eyes, overwhelmed with…something, she wasn't sure what.

He tapped her forehead. "What's going on in there?"

She shook her head and then pressed her face into his shoulder as tears were suddenly in her eyes and the emotions to raw. She wasn't sure why she was crying. "I don't know." She gripped his shirt. "Everything's just too much all at once, I'm not sure." She pulled back. "I still haven't dealt with everything from last night." She looked up at his face and shrugged. "I'm sorry."

He kissed her forehead. "Don't be sorry for being human, Dani. It's been a crazy few days." He sat up and then stood. He held out a hand. "Come here."

She took his hand and he led her to the bed where he sat her down, then he left and returned with the wine. He handed her glass to her. "Drink."

She sat on the bed in her heels and bra, and drank her wine trying to figure out was going on in her head. She was confused about so much. She watched the man across the room as he watched her and wondered what he was thinking. His eyes were dark and she knew they were full of need. The way he looked at her instantly made her hot again and she wondered how that was even possible given the number of times she'd came in the past twenty four hours. She shivered.

Nico leaned against the dresser as he sipped from his own glass. He saw her shiver and wondered what she was thinking. He hoped the night wasn't over. He was so hot he would be fully hard in seconds, but he was still fully dressed, and he would never push her. "Dani, I can take you home." He tried to gauge her reaction, but wasn't able to. "I don't want to, but I will."

Dani took another sip of her wine and made up her mind. She stood, set down her glass, took the two steps to where he was and slipped her arms up around his neck. "Nico, please..." Her voice was desperate.

He reached around her and put his glass on the dresser before he palmed her ass to pull her against his erection. "Dani..." He sounded hoarse. "Tell me what you want."

"I can't, because I don't know." She rubbed her palms against the stubble on his face, he obviously hadn't shaved. "I have no idea what I want, because everything is falling apart around me." She wiped at her eyes. "Matt, the kids, TK, maybe even my practice, then Pittman…everything Nico…Everything is shit right now. Everything, but this…You and me and whatever it is we have…" She pulled him down for a kiss that tasted of her and deep red wine and then pulled back just enough to see his eyes, her lips a whisper from his, "This is the only thing that feels right." She moaned and let Nico steal another kiss.

She pulled back and rubbed her cheek against the rough texture of his. "I'm going to have beard burn in the most sensitive places." She gave him a shy smile as her fingers slid to the buttons of his shirt and she started working them open.

"Sorry," he self-consciously touched his face, "no time to shave today." She was dragging her nails down his chest a bit harshly, lightly scoring his skin and leaving him breathless.

She shook her head and bit her lip as her hands hit his waistband. She caught his eyes. "No, I like it, and besides, in the morning it'll itch", She pressed a kiss to his collarbone, "and it will burn…" her breath caught and she kissed his other collarbone, "and every time I think about why…" She reached up and pulled his head down and kissed him, pulling his bottom lip lightly between her teeth until he moaned. She let it go and added. "I'll remember your head between my legs and it'll make me hot and wet all day." Her fingers found his hipbones and teased as she pulled his dark shirt from his navy pants.

He released the breath was holding his breath. "So, you're going to seduce me tonight?" He cocked an eyebrow at her.

She smiled. "I'm not an innocent schoolgirl Nico." Her hand was on his belt and now she raised her eyebrow at him in challenge.

His hands stilled hers as they started undoing his belt and he held her eyes. That wolfish grin was back on his face again and she swallowed. The look in his eyes was passionate, feral and almost possessive. She wanted to look away, but she couldn't and she wet her lips and swallowed, not willing to back down.

Then his grip tightened on her hands and his smile changed to something a bit darker, and dangerous. His voice was full of dark, promises that sent tiny spikes of both fear and lust through her blood. "Does this feel right?" The hold on her hands got a bit rougher and in a second he had her backed up to the bed, both her small hands securely in his much larger left. "Is this what feels right, Dani?" He pressed and she found herself on her back with her hands suddenly pinned over her head.

She stared up at him, her chest was heaving and a buzz ran through her. There was something in his eyes she'd only started to glimpse and she was starting to realize she liked it. She licked at her lips again. She wasn't sure how to answer. She wasn't sure there was a correct answer. She pushed her shoes off her feet just as Nico's mouth found the sensitive place where along her collarbone and kissed up to her ear.

"Because this is what feels right to me Danielle." He pulled back and gave her dangerous smile when she struggled to free her hands. "I'll let you go when I'm ready." He ran his free hand up the length of her from her knee to her breast. "Right now I like you…a little helpless."

She growled and writhed under him. "I want to touch you," she kissed his jaw.

He ignored her and continued his assault on her mouth. His hand moved higher to burrow into her hair and pulled pins and clips free as he slanted her mouth to suit him.

Frustrated she slid her toes up the side of his left leg and felt him shiver, but when her knee jarred his, he jerked away from her mouth with a sudden hiss.

"Shit." He mumbled softly before going back to kissing her neck.

But Dani wasn't having it. His hold on her hands had loosened and she sat up to reach for his knee with concern, "Nico, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you?"

He tried to continue, and pulled her back to him. "It's okay Dani, you didn't", he laughed and shook his head at her confusion as he rubbed his knee gingerly. "My knee's fine, but other part's need your attention." He slid his hand up to his fly and worked it open to stroke himself.

She smiled as she knelt beside him. She watched and unknowingly bit her lip then let her palm slide over him softly before she pulled her hand away with a shake of her head. "I'll get to you, but really how'd you hurt the knee?"

Nico sighed and dropped his hand. "You're going to kill me." He eased to the side of the bed, stood up and slid his pants off, totally unconcerned that he was now completely naked. The bruise on his left knee was a nasty purple and red thing now. "Ronnie's got a wicked defensive kick." He sat down, frustrated now, and leaned against the headboard keeping his left knee straight while he bent the right. "I should have listened and iced it down."

Dani knelt beside him stared at the leg. It wasn't just bruised; it was swollen. "You think, maybe you should see a doctor or one of the trainers? This could be serious" She took in the bruises over his ribs as well and ran her hands over them. "These too then?"

He glanced down, they really weren't bothering him. "Yeah, didn't really notice those and I'm sure I'll be fine Dani, let's just see how it does in a week or so before we call in the surgeons okay?" He traced a finger over her cheek, enchanted by her concern.

"What the hell were you letting him do to you? Use you as a punching bag?" She sat back on her heels and crossed her arms under her breasts.

Nico thought she was adorable right now, he didn't tell her that, but all protective and naked, it was cute. He smiled and moved hair over her shoulder since it was obscuring the view of her breast. "Her actually, and yes, but it was by agreement, and I gave as good as I got, so it was a fair enough fight."

"Her?! You were fighting a woman?"

He bit back a smile. "I was sparring with a woman. I try not to fight with women unless my life is at stake, but a woman can kill me just as quick as a man Dani." He motioned to his knee. "And as you can see, even when you're practicing, a woman can do serious damage."

"That was practice?" She gave him a steady look. "Did you take anything for it?"

He shook his head. "It wasn't that bad until I spent all that time on my knees," he shot her a knowing look as he ran his hands over the top of her thighs, "and I wasn't thinking very clearly today…I needed to see you…to taste you..." He sat up, pressed a soft kiss above her breast "to…"

She shivered and pulled back interrupting him. "Okay, but first," she got up and slipped on his shirt, she wasn't quite ready to parade completely naked around in front of him. "Let me get you something for the swelling and the pain." She glanced at him as she did three of the buttons and rolled up the sleeves. She needed to track down her purse. She always kept a small bottle of ibuprofen in it for when she went out. She located her purse by the door and after a quick search found what she was looking for. She palmed the bottle and returned to the bed. Holding up the small white container she asked, "Allergic?"

When he shook his head she dumped four of the orange pills into her hand. She handed them over to him along with her glass of wine and the quiet order of, "Then take them."

He bit back a smile, "Yes, ma'am." He tossed back the pills with a sip of wine and handed the glass back to her. He liked this maternal side of her, he'd seen it with the players, not to mention with Ray Jay earlier, and strangely it just made her more attractive to him. Well, that and the sight of her drowning in his shirt that came to her knees.

"Maybe we really should call it a night?" She sat down beside him on the bed and eyed the knee with pity.

Nico growled and pulled her down bedside him. He rolled to his side. "Hell no," he took her hand and placed her palm over his mostly still erect cock while he nuzzled her neck. "I'm dying to be inside you again Dani." He undid the buttons on his shirt and found her skin. He kissed up the side of her neck to her ear and then moaned when she stroked him to full hardness. His head fell back to the pillow. "I need you."

She sat up and smiled down at him. "I can see that." She pressed kisses to his chest and flicked his nipples with her tongue. "Let me take care of you now, Nico."

"Isn't that what you've been doing?" He groaned as she used her hair to tease down his chest. She shed his shirt and settled herself between his legs. She looked up at him, licked her lips and then took him into her mouth. She swirled her tongue around the thick tip of him, teasing the slit just before she let him slide deep with a quick lift of his hips. She grasped the base of him and set a pace she could handle, using the flat of her tongue to sweep side to side as she slid up and down.

Dani's mouth was a sweet torture and he found himself straining upward as her fingers teased over his chest and hips. He was amazed how quickly she had him sweating and straining below her. He gathered hair so he could watch, but he kept getting lost in his pleasure and eventually his eyes were closed and head thrown back as he gripped the bedspread. His bent his right knee up as he fought the urge to thrust roughly down her throat. This wasn't what he wanted. He needed her, but not this way, so he reached for her and pulled her gently away from his aching cock.

She didn't want to give him up and she protested with a groan. "Nico…let me finish…" She pouted, her lips swollen and glistening with saliva and precum.

"Dani…" He sat up and pulled her across his lap so she straddled him. He pushed her hair from her face and kissed her. "I want to make love to you…to be inside you…I want to see your face when I cum…when you cum." He pressed a kiss to her jaw, "I could barely think about anything else all day…" and then another kiss to her throat, god she was so wet again, "I love how wet you are for me…" her slit was pressed against his cock and he rocked against her. "You feel so good."

"Nico…" His name came from her lips like a desperate prayer. She grabbed his face and looked into his eyes, "My god, what are you doing to me?" She kissed him then and rocked against him; gasping at the heat it sent coursing through her body. "I didn't think…god…" her head fell back as she gripped his shoulders and rocked against him again.

"What?" He leaned forward and pressed kisses to her chest and down to her breasts as he held her. The friction was more torture and he wasn't going to be able to hold out much longer. "What Dani…tell me…?" He asked between kisses and licks at her breasts. His own breathing was quite erratic now and every other thrust his knee throbbed, but he didn't care.

Her head bobbed forward and she forced herself to focus on him as she held onto his solid shoulders. "Never thought you'd work me up again…fuck…there…yes"

"Really, you doubt me?" He was being cocky and he knew it as his fingers dropped to her clit and stroked the swollen nub just the right way. He pressed his mouth to her ear. "I know you like it this way Dani…I figured that out already." He pressed and circled hard, then backed off, then repeated the motion and he had her begging him.

"Please, Nico, god…"

"Tell me what you want Dani." He pulled back and when her hips kept moving against his, he stilled them with his hands on her hips. "Tell me what you need Dani." He lifted her chin to catch her eyes.

"I want you to make love to me." She watched his face and his eyes encouraged her for more. "I want you inside me Nico, god I need you to make me cum."

He reached for his pants, which were on the other side of the bed, and in the pocket he found what he needed. "Dani, I need you so much." He rolled the condom down his length, holding the base, he gripped her hip with his other hand to guide her down onto him. He groaned as he slid fully inside.

Dani tried to be careful of his knee by supporting her weight on his shoulders as he entered her. God, he felt so good filling her and stretching her, she thought she'd be happy to stay that way. Then, when he was completely inside she tightened herself around him and for the first time she realized he had her aroused enough that she could probably make herself cum that way if she had enough time.

Nico moaned. "Dani…shit…" His fingers were digging into her hips. "What the hell are you doing?"

She smiled down at him and shook her head to get her hair over her shoulder. "What?" She tightened her muscles around his cock again, this time fluttering them around him, and she felt the heat curl from inside out toward her clit and she shivered. "That?"

Nico smiled at her. "Now who's being sadistic?" He lifted up his hips and thrust, which made Dani gasp. He wasn't going to last long and he knew it. He shifted his position, pulled her closer, still trying to be careful of his knee, but knowing he didn't really care much at this point. Her legs were over his thighs and when he shifted, she locked them at the ankle behind his back. He pulled her tight against him placing her breasts about even with his chin and his teeth took advantage of the fact that her left nipple was hard and pulled it into his mouth.

Dani's hands wound into his hair and she pressed his head to her chest, overwhelmed with sensation as he rocked up into her. His teeth and beard were rough on her breast and he already had her panting. Her head fell back and she thrust counter to him, matching his rhythm, grinding herself against him and creating a delicious friction that was sending her closer and closer to her climax.

Nico lifted his head from her breast with a desperate groan. "Dani…" He kissed up her throat and his thrusts became more erratic. He framed her face with his hands. "I need you to cum for me baby…god, you feel so good." He shifted again. This time he leaned forward pressing her backward, arching her back over his arm to change the angle of his hips. It drove him deeper and he moaned at the desperate whimper she made when he drove into her.

Between thrusts he gasped out. "God, Dani…you are so fucking beautiful this way…I'll never get enough of you…"

Dani grabbed the wrists at her waist. She wasn't prepared for the intensity of his thrusts or for how deep he would suddenly be, and the combination of pleasure and pain sent her to the edge. Nico's soft murmurs are what sent her over the edge. She came in a sudden rush of heat, gasping, with her head thrown back and her body arched off the bed.

Nico had been watching Dani's tension build and when he saw it peak and felt the sudden flush of heat and pulsations around his cock, it was what he had been waiting for. His hips hitched and thrust and he groaned long and low, "Dani…" His fingers bit a bit deep into her hips and he pulled her tighter to him. "You're going…to kill me…" He pulled her up, found her lips and thrust hard. He pulled back and moaned her name and then he threw his head back and came.

It was a few long seconds before he could move and when he could, he pulled out and shifted gingerly on his sore knee. He sat up and took care of the condom before lying back down and propping himself up comfortably with a couple of pillows. He winced at his knee once again.

Dani was lying sideways across the bed on her belly watching him, she was sated and had no desire to move, but she pulled a concerned face as her eyebrows drew together. "Are…" Her voice was gravelly and she cleared her throat, "are you okay?"

Because Dani was across the bed he reached down, grabbed her arms and with a mumbled, "Come here…" he pulled her up so she could lie beside him. "My knee is sore, but I'll live." He rolled her so she was snuggled beside him with her head on his chest. He pressed a kiss to her temple and tucked hair behind her ear. "You amaze me." His hand drifted over the smooth skin of her shoulder and side. He felt her smile against his chest.

"Right now I'm too exhausted to be amazing." She yawned and traced a circle around his nipple. "But I do feel like I should be purring or something."

He chuckled. "Feel free, I'm sure it'll be sexy as hell."

She turned and looked up, her chin on Nico's chest so she could see his face. "Hmm, you find purring hot, I'll keep that in mind." She watched his face, reached up and traced a finger over his lips. "Your lips are sexy, do you know that? I didn't think men's lips could be sexy, but yours make me think about kissing them every time I see them." She slid up and did just that. She kissed him soft and sweet, slowly and seductively. The kiss was a slow burn that did eventually take her breath away even though she hadn't meant it to. She pulled back and looked at him. "Damn…"

He kissed her nose as his hands trailed over back. "You remind me of poetry. I know you said you didn't know modern poets, but one of my favorites wrote:

_i like my body when it is with your_

_body. It is so quite new a thing._

_Muscles better and nerves more._

_i like your body. i like what it does,_

_i like its hows. i like to feel the spine_

_of your body and its bones, and the trembling_

_-firm-smooth ness and which i will_

_again and again and again_

_kiss…_

"It's exactly how I feel about being with you Dani. My body with yours is so much better." He massaged her shoulder and felt her shiver. "Learning what turns you on, makes you wet." He traced a long line up the underside of her arm and then down her side, over the curve of her breast. "So I can remember it next time, what your body does, its hows…and your trembling firm-smooth ness," his words took on a seductive drawl that made her shiver and burn at the same time. He pressed kisses down her neck. "I will again and again and again kiss…"

She said his name almost breathlessly and turned her face to kiss him. It didn't escalate, but they kissed for several minutes and then she pulled back with a sigh and rested her head on his chest. "I just might have to look into those modern poets."

He chuckled and smoothed her hair down. After a few minutes he asked, "You hungry? I can call down for something now or later, or we can get take out." He checked his watch. "It's not too late, we could still go out. I can probably get us a table somewhere if you want."

Dani realized just how hungry she was when Nico mentioned food. Her stomach growled and she frowned. "I wasn't hungry until you mentioned it." She sat up and put a hand over her stomach. "But now I'm starving." She sat cross legged on the bed beside him, facing him. "Any idea what you would like?" She wasn't sure what she wanted, but she'd go out or stay in. Honestly, she didn't care. Staying in meant she could stay naked with Nico and that was definitely a perk.

He watched her and wished he had the artistic ability to draw her, just the way she was now. Sitting naked in their post sex bed, her lips swollen, eyes sated, hair mussed, with that smile on her face and nothing pressing on her thoughts. He'd like to keep that look on her face all the time. He'd prefer it for himself as well. He sighed and tucked his hands behind his head. "Hmm…"

Dani shifted beside him and then she was on her belly, chin on her hands with her head by his. "What if we order something up?"

He smiled at the ceiling. He was half hoping she'd want to stay in so he could enjoy more time with her naked, though he was also contemplating enjoying showing her off. There was something empowering about being out with a beautiful woman on your arm. "I'll call down to the Concierge and have her send something up from Crossroads. It's better than room service." He looked over at Dani. "What sounds good?"

She rolled her eyes. "I haven't eaten since this morning and I don't know the menu, how am I supposed to pick something, but that croissant was perfect, you have excellent taste."

"I'll choose then." He picked up the phone and called the Concierge desk.

There was a quiet conversation and it was obvious to Dani that they knew Nico quite well, which made sense since the Hawks leased the room, but she couldn't help but wonder how many times he'd brought other women here and that thought made a cold knot form in her gut. She rolled to her back and dropped a hand over her eyes. What exactly was she doing?

If she were one of her patients she would be telling herself to get some perspective and some distance. There were too many emotions and too much at once. Between the end of one relationship, problems with work and home, the connection between Matt, Nico and work; she wasn't sure where one started sometimes and the other began. Boundaries were crossing and mixing, personal was becoming professional and she didn't like it. Black and white were fading to the point that sometimes she was only able to identify the darkest of shades anymore. She wondered how Nico slept some nights.

She lifted her arm from her eyes and glanced over at him to find him watching her.

He was off the phone, had rolled to his side and had his head propped on his elbow. "Deep thoughts Dr. Dani?" He reached over and traced the curve of her eyebrow. "You look like you do when you're worried about TK or one of your other clients."

She shook her head. She wasn't about to share everything in her head with him. She smiled and pushed away the doubts, at least for now. She just told him, being with him felt right and it did, she wasn't lying about that. When he touched her, everything came into pinpoint focus and she knew exactly what she wanted. She reached for his hand and when he took it she kissed it. "How long until the food gets here?"

"Forty-five minutes or so, why?" His eyebrow shot up.

Her smile widened. "Because that bathroom has a huge tub…I thought you might want to join me."


	8. The Trick is to Keep Breathing

**_NOTE:_**Thanks to everyone who reads, reviews, favorites and follows; I appreciate you all. This week was busy, but much better than last week. Flu season and flu shot season is always busy, but at least my patients aren't in the hospital at an inordinate rate this week.

The story moves forward with lots of angst this week, so hope you're ready...again all mistakes are my own because I have no beta ;)

Oh, and Lattelady has graciously lent me Nico's loft, so while this chapter had very little of it, there may be more coming. I didn't have much time to discuss detail with her so I kept mention of his home very general. And if I messed up his home with what little I did add, there isn't much, then I apologize now.

* * *

**The Trick is to Keep Breathing**

_Later same night_

Nico drove her home with a promise that he'd have someone either pick her up, or drop her car off later in the morning, although he had suggested that she stay the night. Dani insisted she would need to take Ray Jay to school or at least be there to make sure he found a ride, otherwise there would be too much to explain, she was glad that Lindsay was still staying at Tara's house.

He pulled into the drive and parked. He really wasn't in a hurry to say goodnight, but he knew he had to drive back to the city and it was late. He turned to Dani. "Again, thank you."

"Nico…" She knew she was blushing and she wished she would just stop doing it. She put a hand to her face, "God, you make me blush like a virgin."

He laughed and leaned into her space. "That is one thing I guarantee you are not, Dr. Santino." He fingered a strand of her hair. In the bath it had gotten damp and the ends now curled around his fingers. "But, thank you for everything Dani, not just the sex." He kissed her cheek. "You care and, that means something to me."

She saw something in his eyes, a flash of vulnerability, it was just a hint and while she'd seen it before-on the porch when he spoke about losing Marshall and when he talked about Juliette and possibly a few other times- it was rare. She took his hand and her other cupped his cheek to encourage him to look at her. "Nico, of course I care about you. I care about you a lot and in ways that are getting more complicated." She shook her head. "You're a good friend and you're important to me and no matter what that's not gonna change."

His mouth straightened out to a thin line. "I hope you never feel I give you a reason to think differently." He took the hand on his cheek and held it, his finger lightly played over her knuckles.

Dani thought he sounded so morose that she was worried his words might be a warning; a foreshadowing of something to come. "What are you trying to say to me Nico?" Her eyebrows drew together in confusion and she pulled back into her seat, separating herself from him some.

He didn't let go of her hand. "Dani wait, I'm trying to say that I don't want to fuck this up." He sighed and then did release her hand to run his hand through his hair in agitation. "I don't trust many people and over the yeahrs I've only had a few people close enough to really call friend," his eyes had been focused on the garage door while he spoke, but now he turned his hurt look to Dani, "and the best of them just killed himself." He swallowed hard, trying to gain control. When had an even measure of it he added, "I've had even fewer serious relationships," he took a deep breath, "and with you, I've not only found someone I can trust and call a friend, but I think I could see what's between us becoming serious. In fact, I really hope it does."

She stared at him, speechless that he actually put words to feelings so soon.

He leaned into her space again. "You don't have to say anything. I know you're still letting go of Donnally." He didn't touch her but his lips were a breath from hers. "I also know you want to let go Dani, but you're still afraid and that's okay. You probably should be on some level, but I'd never hurt you."

"I know and I trust you with my life, that's not what scares me about you." She swallowed a thick lump in her throat.

He tilted her face with his fingers below her chin so he could see her eyes. His thumb traced her lips. "What scares you?"

She shivered at the intensity in his eyes. "So much…Nico, but that…this-what you do to me, my god Nico the way you can do this to me is unreal, and that scares me on a personal, self-discovery level." She took his hand. "But what makes me wary of an 'us' is the unknown. It's the things I don't know about that could hurt me, those 'what if' moments and 'almosts' in the middle of the night. That violence that follows you around and the darkness that you try to hide from everyone, even from yourself," she touched his forehead and smoothed a worry line away.

"The things that make that angry glint show up in your eyes from time to time," she touched his jaw, "and make you clench your teeth when you don't think anyone is watching."

She took a steadying breath. "You're carrying a lot of something around with you…something, I don't know what, sadness, guilt, pain, anger…" she shrugged, "I know what happens to relationships when those things suddenly come to the surface. I just don't want to be a casualty."

Nico gave her a sad smile. "So, because I have a dark past we have no possible future?" His voice had a bit of an edge, but he kept it well controlled and quiet. "Is that fair? I'm the first to admit, I've done things I regret, but so have many people who have sat in your office. What about your ex-husband and the man who was in your bed before me? Just because you don't know about their actions, doesn't mean they didn't do things they regret."

He took her hand back and before he realized what he was doing he was tracing the kanji characters for balance and strength over her palm. "How about you Dani? Didn't you ever do anything you wished you could take back?" His eyebrow rose.

She gasped at him, and when she didn't answer he continued. "Life is about the journey Danielle. We can't live life worrying about 'what if'. Did you know how your last two relationships were going to end? Did you know Ray was going to cheat on you?" He let her hand go. "Did you know you were going to end up having to turn Donnally away?"

She gave him a sharp look. "Are you saying something in particular Nico?"

He shook his head, while he did know a few things; he wasn't going to share them with her right now. "No, I'm making a simple point Dani. We never know what's going to happen in any relationship. They can start as comfortable and friendly and end up with lawyers and court rooms or start out with two people arguing and end up as passionate love affairs; some last yeahrs or forever, while others burn out over days or weeks. It's the nature of passion, love and people." He gave her a steady, gaze. He was upset, but not angry. "I thought I knew you better Dani."

She didn't know what to say to him, maybe he was right. Maybe her fear of getting hurt again so soon was getting in the way. Between her divorce and then Matt, she'd been on an emotional roller coaster.

Nico saw the uncertainty on her face and nodded, it was enough for him for now. He reached into the back seat. "You might want this." He pulled something from the floor behind the passenger seat and set it on Dani's lap.

If Dani thought she'd been blushing earlier, she should have seen her face as Nico set the black duffle bag on her lap.

"Nico…"

He looked at her and his eyes softened, "I had no plans on keeping you commando, you know."

She nodded, her hands gripping the duffle nervously. "I…Nico…"

He reached across the seat and pulled her to him, his lips found hers in a rush of passion and need. His mouth opened over hers and his tongue took what it wanted, demanding that she return its attention. He wasn't going to let her leave thinking he was angry. He wasn't. He'd had time to adjust to his growing attraction and feelings, while she was just coming to the realization. He could be stubborn, he could be persuasive and he knew how to get what he wanted.

Dani didn't fight the kiss, in fact she found she wanted it and needed it. She gripped Nico's neck, tugged him closer and kissed him back with the same passion he kissed her. When he finally pulled back, she sat there dazed. She blinked and touched her lips.

"Your car will be here by six?" He tucked her hair behind her ear as he sat back.

She nodded-okay back to business as usual then-she thought. "That's fine, I'll get Ray Jay to school and then I told Griffen I'd meet him at nine thirty." He had asked to speak with her. She reached for her purse and grabbed the handle of the duffle.

"I'll have Ray Jay's car out of impound by this afternoon." He opened his door, walked around and helped Dani from the car to walk her to the door.

"You don't have to do that Nico. We can get it…"

He interrupted her with a finger to her lips as she stood. "Stop, I have people. If you want to pay me back, fine, but I'll get the car out of impound." He took the duffle and slung it over his shoulder. "I also have information about the Harper kid, he's bad news Dani and Ray Jay needs to stay away from him."

"Tyler?" She snorted as they walked to the door. "Really?" The kid didn't look much like trouble, but Dani knew looks could be deceiving.

"Tyler and his older brother Mason; both of them are trouble. Just make sure Ray Jay steers clear until we get this handled."

"I'll let him know." She pulled her keys from her purse and unlocked the door. She let Nico follow behind her as she keyed the alarm code in and then turned to him. "Thanks again for helping with that this morning." Wow, she could hardly believe that was just earlier this same day.

He put the duffle on the bench by the door with a nod. "Anytime you need me, you call." he glanced around the foyer, always checking, it was quiet. "You'll be alright?" He stepped closer.

She looked up at him and put her hands flat on his chest as his hands found her shoulders. She shrugged. "I'm a big girl. I need time to figure this out…" She turned her head and rested it on his chest with a sigh when he wrapped his arms around her. She let him hold her for a few seconds only pulling away when he drew back.

"I'm not going to hurt you Dani."

"I know if you do, it won't be something you mean to do." She glanced at the floor. "I'm just scared, Nico."

He nudged her shoulder with his own. "Don't be afraid. A wise half-elf once said, 'If we deny love that is given to us, if we refuse to give love because we fear the pain of loss, then our lives will be empty, our loss greater.'" He slid his hands into the pocket of his jacket and palmed his keys. He pressed a kiss to the top of her head, opened the door and as he was pulling it closed added. "Lock up and set the alarm. I'll see you soon, Dani." Then he was gone.

She stared at the door in confusion. "Half elf?" She giggled a bit and shook her head. "Love?" The man confused the hell out of her, she'd have to ask him about that later, but now she locked the door and set the alarm like he asked. Then she pulled back the curtain on the window and watched him.

He didn't immediately get into the car, but instead leaned against the door and made a phone call. Obviously, Nico didn't respect anyone else's clock either, because it was past midnight and he was chatting in her driveway like it was midday. The man was a complete puzzle to her, which appealed to her in so many ways and scared the hell out of her in others, which was exactly why she was hesitant to admit there might be more to this attraction.

She had a feeling that an IQ test would qualify him to sit for MENSA membership. She snorted, hell for all she knew, he was already a member. She knew that he could read people better than she could sometimes and his understanding of human behavior was just about as good as any therapist she knew. She sighed and just as she was about to drop the curtain she realized he was watching her.

He held up his phone with an exaggerated wiggle before putting it to his ear. She watched him open the door to the car and then she smiled as a second later her phone rang from her purse. She grabbed her purse and the duffle and started up the stairs, digging for her phone as she went. She answered with a breathless, "Nico?"

"Did you lock the door?"

"Of course," She dropped the duffle on the bed with her purse and sat beside it, kicking off her shoes. She heard his car purr as it accelerated. "And set the alarm and then I was wondering who else you wake up at twelve in the morning from my driveway."

He chuckled. "I had to call someone to get your car."

"Oh…" She fell back on the bed and caught Nico's scent from the duffle. It sent a spark up her spine and she rolled over to pull the bag toward her. "So, what's the deal with stealing my panties by the way?"

"You just ask me that now."

She imagined the smile on his face. She felt safer at this distance with him. Hot and bothered, but she could control it. "Well, I can actually think, now." She toyed with the zipper. "When you're here, you're a distraction."

"You're the distraction baby. Open the bag."

Her brows pulled together. "Why?" Now she was curious.

"You asked me about the panties Dani. I'm answering you."

She sighed and pulled the zipper slowly. The bag was full, but not with her panties. There were three of her bath towels rolled up. She pulled them out and found a fourth towel wrapped around a bottle. "Wine?"

"I still have no idea why you prefer a ten dollar bottle of chardonnay over a decent single malt, and since I haven't had to pick up a ten dollar bottle in quite some time, I apologize now if it's horrible."

She could hear the contained humor in his voice as she pulled the bottle from the bag with a small smile. She sat up fully and read the label, "It's far from horrible. It's one of Jeanette's favorites to drown her sorrows in. It's good, with a touch of pear and vanilla with a clean finish. I think you'd be surprised." She set the bottle down and folded the towels beside her absently. "Nico, um…I'm glad to have my towels back, which I had more than enough of by the way, but I still need my underwear."

He laughed now, so loud Dani had to pull the phone from her ear.

"I never took them Dani."

"What?" Her voice squeaked. "You emptied out my drawers! You said you took them. If you didn't take them, you lied." She drew up her eyebrows and added suspiciously. "You say you don't lie."

"I rearranged your drawers. I never actually said I took your panties, I said I had what I wanted." He clucked his tongue. "What I wanted was, you in a skirt without your panties in front of…" He paused and then added low and suggestively, "everyone."

She went hot and cold at the same time. "Oh, Nico Careles, you are…" She swallowed, oh god she didn't even know what to say, she wasn't angry as much as she was now suddenly flustered, frustrated and upset that he'd managed to pull it off. She stood and stomped to her dresser deciding to go for indignant, "So where are they?" She roughly pulled open her drawers and shoved her clothing aside searching. "I swear Nico if I have to go another day without my underwear…" she yanked a drawer so hard it fell to the floor. "Dammit." She cursed loudly. "This is your fault Careles." She was getting louder. "Hiding my panties like a pervert…."

"Shh, you'll wake Ray Jay Dani."

"So what?"

"Well, if he hears you, are you prepared to explain to him what I've been doing in your underwear drawer? You've only mentioned my name and missing underwear loud enough for your neighbors to hear about three times now." He half laughed. "Now if you want to discuss your sex life with your seventeen yeahr old son, by all means, be my guest."

She pulled the phone from her ear and glared at it. How dare he sound so reasonable? "Stop making sense or I'll hang up on you."

"That's practical when you're trying to get information from me." He teased. "Now, if you decide not to hang up, let me know when you're done with the temper tantrum."

She stopped with a sigh and smiled. She'd give him credit he was not raising to the bait. "Okay, fine. I give; game, set, match…Nico Careles, you win."

Somehow she knew he was smiling.

"I always do Dani and check your closet in the box marked winter sweaters. They're all there I promise. Even that sexy little black and purple lace number…"

She stood there and flushed from head to toe. She knew exactly which pair he was talking about, but that wasn't what worried her. Her voice was hoarse and it wavered. "You went through them?" She was embarrassed as hell. Her lingerie wasn't all sexy lacey, thongs a la Victoria Secret. A girl had to have everyday, once a month, cotton, who cares what happened to them panties too and she did. They were in the same drawer.

He chuckled. "If you don't stop feeling insecure I'll figure out some way to punish you for it…" he made a small, hmm sound and then added, "and trust me Dani I can be very creative, or not."

She didn't like the sound of that, but it sent a shiver down her spine in the most delicious way. "God Nico, it's just…some things are not meant to be known on a first date or hell before a third anniversary." She giggled a little and put her dresser drawer back in. She stood there with a slip in her hand, "Hell, it was actually before the first date, how much worse can it be?"

"You could have only burlap in your closet and I wouldn't care Dani. I'm interested in you, not your choice of clothing, though I do appreciate what you wrap your body in…mostly because it shows it off so well and I just imagine taking it off, but really Dani. It's you not what you wear."

She put the slip and other odds and ends into the drawer and shut it with a sigh. "You are unbelievable, you know that right?"

"So I've been told." His phone chimed and he paused, cursed, "Shit. Dani, I need to take another call."

"Gabrielle?" Dani's voice was acid.

"No. This one's team related. I'll see you in the morning, I'm sure."

The line disconnected.

Dani pulled the phone from her ear and stared at it. "Okay then."

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It was about ten after six when her doorbell rang the next morning. Dani was up, showered and dressed, but she wasn't exactly bright-eyed. Two nights of little sleep hadn't been good for her and she disengaged the alarm and pulled open the door with a sour face.

"Good morning Dr. Santino." A tall, dark woman, she'd never seen before, stood on the other side of her door. The woman wore a pair of tight, navy cargo pants, tucked into boots, an army vest layered over a denim jacket and short, naturally curly hair."Mr. Careles sent me over with your car." She handed Dani the keys and then the woman held up a blue pastry box and thermos. "He also had me pick this up." She waited for Dani to take the items.

Dani took the box and thermos and looked the woman over. The box was from the café they'd eaten at yesterday morning. She smiled. "Um, thanks. Do you need a ride back?" She glanced down the drive, only then noticing the black SUV in the street. Xeno rolled down the window and waved. She waved back.

"No, Xeno drove out with me. We have a meeting back at the office soon anyway." The woman turned to go, but added. "It was nice to meet you, I'm sure I'll see you around then."

"Okay, but what was your name?" Dani asked stepping out onto the porch still holding the box.

The woman turned and slid her sunglasses down, "Sorry, I'm Ronnie. I just started fulltime. I used to do some of the road work, but I just kind of got a promotion, so I guess you might be seeing me more around the office."

Dani took in the black eye and then looked the woman over again. "Oh my god, you're the Ronnie who fought with Nico aren't you?" Her mouth hung open for a second before she realized it and snapped it closed.

Ronnie smirked. "Why did he say he beat the shit out of me?" She rolled her eyes. "I mean the boss has quite a hook." She touched her eye and then she rolled her shoulder, "He had me on the mat a few times and he's definitely right about that submission move, but I knocked his old ass to the mat a few times too and if he isn't limping some, then his leg is made of fucking steel."

Dani laughed and shook her head. "Oh, hell no…trust me, his knee is killing him." She grabbed Ronnie's arm. "His pride is probably hurting him even more than the knee, but the knee's a mess. I got the impression he had nothing but respect for your skills, by the way."

Ronnie's smile was ear to ear. She winked at Dani. "Nothing worse as a woman in this line of work than having to deal with disrespect from the men you work with. Usually, if the boss respects you, the other men will follow his lead. I didn't really get to work much with Nico before now, but it seems I was right about him." She slid her glasses back on. "I'll catch you later."

Dani watched her jog down the drive and get in the SUV. Then she and Xeno were gone and she was still on the porch holding the blue box by the strings and the thermos.

"Mom."

"Ray Jay." She jumped, startled.

"What's going on?" He motioned to the front door open and her on the porch. "You're barefoot and it's actually cold and what time did you get home? I went to bed at like eleven and you weren't home from that meeting yet."

She shooed him inside and shut the door. "I was home by midnight, but Nico drove me because of a team thing ending late." It wasn't really a lie she told herself. "So, Xeno and one of the other guys just dropped off my car and brought us breakfast." She held up the box.

Ray Jay smiled. "Is it from that place?" He grabbed the box and set it on the counter. He had a knife under the string in seconds. The lid was up and he was making sounds of joy seconds later. "Mom, tell Nico he's my new best friend will you?"

She laughed and rolled her eyes. With teen boys cars, food and pretty girls were all excellent ways to make an impression. She watched as he devoured some kind of cream filled pastry.

"Thweres whon ov twhose cwoissants u iked." Ray Jay said around a mouthful of what must have been utter deliciousness if his face was any indication.

Dani playfully slapped him on the shoulder and made a face. "You know better than to talk with your mouth full." She pulled two coffee mugs from the shelf and poured coffee from the thermos. "Oh hell, he's going to spoil us." She inhaled and then sighed.

She slid a mug to Ray Jay and watched him over the rim of her mug as she sipped. Then she grabbed a plate and put one of the croissants on it. As she ate she talked. "Ray Jay Nico mentioned that Tyler had been in trouble with the police before. Did you know about that?"

Ray looked up. "No." He made a trail through the powder sugar that had fallen on the counter. "I mean he never said anything." He moved to the fridge and pulled some cream out to add to his coffee. He splashed some in and then put it back.

Dani nodded and chewed. "Okay, did you know about any of the drugs?"

"No, I mean I knew he fooled around with some weed and stuff, like smoked some, maybe sold a bit to some friends, but I swear that's it." He held up a hand and like he was taking a pledge. Then he picked up his cup with both hands and sipped.

Dani sipped her own coffee and watched him. She felt he was telling her the truth. "Nico thinks he could be dangerous." The croissant was excellent, though she had to admit it had been much better warm in the café. She wished she would have thought to warm it up before she ate it.

"What? Tyler, are you kidding me? I mean the most dangerous thing he ever did was kick out my taillight." He snorted. "Mom chill, Nico's cool, but he doesn't know everything."

Dani put her mug down and moved to her son until she was directly in front of him. "Ray Jay," her voice was stern, "Oh, he might not know everything, but he knows a hell of a lot more than you." She put her hands on her hips. "And trust me; he knows more about people like Tyler Harper than you or even me. If Nico thinks he might be dangerous, then he probably is. And Nico says stay away from him, so that is exactly what you're going to do. Do you understand me?"

Ray Jay blinked and nodded.

"What was that Ray Jay?" she grabbed his shoulder when he moved from the stool.

"Yes Ma'am." He mumbled. "Can I get my stuff now?"

She sighed. "Just be careful. I mean it Ray Jay, Nico doesn't worry without a good reason." When he looked at her and nodded. She moved aside and let him head out to get his pack.

Dani sank into the seat he just left and let her head rest on the counter. Hell, all she really wanted to do was go back to bed. She was pretty sure there wasn't enough coffee in the world to make her feel ready to face the day. She took a deep breath and lifted her head enough to drag her coffee mug across the counter. "Okay, I can do this." She sipped the coffee and her phone chimed.

She got up and walked across the kitchen to her phone. The message was from Lindsay: Remember, pick me up for school.

Dani rolled her eyes, like she'd forgotten and texted back: 15 min.

She finished her coffee and then found a travel mug. She poured the rest of the coffee from the thermos into it because there was no way she was going to waste it. Then she slipped on her shoes and called for Ray Jay. "Let's go, Ray Jay we need to pick Linds up from Tara's this morning too."

Ray Jay came down the stairs and they headed out the door.

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Nico didn't make it back to his loft last night. Like many other nights, he'd ended up sleeping in his car after bailing a pair of tackles out of jail. He then had to wait for one of them to get discharged from the hospital and then finally, at six thirty in the morning, when he did finally manage to make it home, he was stiff and not in a particularly good mood, so he dropped his keys on the counter and headed directly for the shower.

He stripped his clothes and hung them for the cleaner before he turned the shower heads on. He considered spending an hour under the spray, but he wasn't able to, so he settled for the fifteen minutes or so he had. He eased under the shower and sighed as the water did its thing and massaged his tired muscles. He reached up and adjusted the nozzles with a sigh and then bent forward with his hands braced on the wall as his head fell loosely between his shoulders. He stayed that way until the kink in his neck eased. Then he groaned, pushed from the wall and got to the business of cleaning himself.

He felt a little better by the time he turned the water off. He pulled a towel from the rack, wrapped it around his hips and used another to dry his face and chest before toweling his hair dry. He considered skipping the razor again, but a quick glance in the mirror and he shook his head. He'd have a head start on a full beard by night if he didn't. He had an electric razor and at times he did use it, but he still did prefer an old fashioned straight razor. He'd learned long ago to shave with it and like his grandfather told him, if he kept the blade sharp and at the right angle, nothing would give him a closer shave.

He pulled an antique razor with an iridescent green Bakelite handle from a box in the drawer. His shaving mug and white badger bristle brush followed and he took his time to work up a good lather and by the time he was done his mind was as clear as his face and he felt much better. He always did after he shaved. There was something about the ritual of the brush, the razor and steady hands. He had to clear his mind to do it right and when he was done he felt focused and ready for his day.

He rinsed his face and applied a light aftershave. He finished with his grooming and dressed as he waited on his espresso. He checked his messages. There was nothing pressing, mostly missed calls that were forwarded to his cell.

He checked Onyx's food and water, there was plenty, and bent to scratch behind his ears when he finally showed himself. He found himself talking to the cat and then shook his head. "I'm not sure why I talk to you." He scratched under the cat's chin. "You never answer."

The cat purred and rubbed Nico's hand with the side of his head. The cat lifted his lip and rubbed harder along his owner's index finger.

"Yeah, I belong to you." He smiled at the ragged thing and scratched him again; this time down his back. The cat had a notched right ear and his tail was bent at a tip. Nico was pretty sure he was blind in one eye too, but no one was sure. Nico sighed as he stood. The cat wrapped itself around Nico's leg in farewell and then lazily headed to his favorite perch by the window.

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Nico arrived early to the Hawks complex, which was what he had planned. He needed to meet with Griffen at some point today and he was hoping it would be early as he hadn't bothered to notify him about Hancock and Swisher the night before. Nico was pretty sure that he'd be able to get charges dropped, at least for Swisher, but Hancock might have to at least pay a fine. They'd have to see what happened. The lawyer was involved at this point. At least the only one hurt was Swisher and Nico had talked him out of pressing charges against his own teammate.

Nico picked up a pen from his desk as he pushed back from the workspace with a sigh. He twirled the object with his fingers as he thought; working on security details for Sunday. He leaned over to jot down assignments just as his phone rang. He picked it up and glanced at the screen.

He slid a Bluetooth headset on and hit accept. "Gabrielle."

"Nico, you doing okay?" She almost sounded concerned.

Ignoring her question, he asked. "What do you need?"

She sighed at the cold shoulder. "Well, I was hoping you would be able to come out and fly in with us."

"First, why on earth would you think I would do something like that and second, why should I do something like that for you?" He pinched the bridge of his nose.

Her voice turned icy. "Well, I was thinking you might do it for Juliette." There was a pause, "you know, since you love he like a daughter and all."

The pen in his fingers snapped with a curse and he stood pissed off as ink flowed from the broken barrel. "Mother fu…" He tossed the broken pen in the small trash can, slid the phone to his pocket and headed to the closest sink, which was in the break area, to wash his hands. His movements were crisp and short and the three people he passed, stepped out of his way, even Gabrielle didn't interrupt him. "Don't you dare try to manipulate me anymore using Juliette." He turned on the water and filled his hand with soap and washed as he continued at the same time. "My feelings for her won't change, but my feelings for you died because of what you did."

He pulled paper towels from the dispenser and dried his hands, tossed them and then, since he was in the kitchen area, grabbed coffee before returning to his office.

Gabrielle gave him a running commentary while he headed to his office. "This has nothing to do with me and you Nico. This is about what's best for Juliette and I think it would be best for her if you came here and flew back with us." She sighed and suddenly sounded like she would cry. "She's fragile Nico, I don't know if she's going to make it."

Nico didn't believe it. "Then let me talk to her. Where is she?"

There was a long pause. "She won't talk to you."

That was bullshit and he knew it, so he said so. "That's a lie, either you won't let her or she's somewhere they won't let her, that's possible."

"I'm not lying Nico, she won't talk to you right now….to anyone."

He sat in his chair and set his coffee down. "Then why should I come out there again?"

"To convince her to come to Marshall's funeral," Gabrielle paused and swallowed back some kind of emotion, "I think she needs to go for closure, but she says she can't go."

God, Nico understood could that. He didn't want to go either. If he went it meant it was real, it was final. If he didn't go he could keep pretending that Marshall was just off on one of his long self-induced holidays. Post cards sent from around the world with cryptic notes and then signed with pithy closings like Missing in Malaysia or Absent in Australia when things were good or if they weren't they'd say Bereft in Brazil, Empty in Egypt sometimes even worse. Nico had kept them all. Rarely did he even need to read the words, the writing itself would tell the story. "I know what she means." His voice was quiet.

The woman made a sharp sound. "But you'll go and you aren't his daughter. I mean she has to show up, if she doesn't people will talk. She has a duty, she's his goddamn heir. He's left her everything Nico do you know that? EVERYTHING!?"

So, the reason she called was she was upset about how things looked in the press. He was pissed, but her last words made him smile. That's what really had her upset; she must have read the will. "She is his daughter and Marshall had no other family."

She snorted. "Don't you start with me either you asshole, you probably know what's in the will too, don't you?"

Nico honestly had no clue. Marshall never shared that kind of information with him. He frowned. "Whoa, two minutes ago you were begging me to drag my ass across the country to escort you back here, now you're accusing me of inside knowledge of the will and calling me names. Is there something in the water out there causing delusional thinking?"

"I'm sorry, it's just I didn't see a lot of what is in the will coming, probably because of the divorce and he changed things around. You may want a lawyer Nico, you should know that. The official reading will be after the funeral."

Shit, Nico didn't want to be in Marshall's will, he knew it would be complicated. Nothing with Marshall was uncomplicated. He needed that letter Gabrielle mentioned in their first phone call; there was probably something in the letter about this, because knowing how Marshall was he would put some random clue about it in that damn note.

"Gabrielle, did you send Marshall's letter to me out?"

"You should get it today interoffice mail and the funeral will be Thursday and I am coming out later today to finalize arrangements. Hopefully, Juliette will be coming with me. She's still in the hospital, but they feel she's stable enough to leave at this point."

"If she's still in the hospital, does she even know when Marshall's funeral is Gabrielle?" He was so angry at this woman right now. She'd been lying to him this entire conversation.

"No. They haven't let me talk with her." She didn't even have the decency to sound contrite.

"Goodbye." He pressed the button on the headset to disconnect the call and his hand was shaking when he did it. If he could break something or someone he would.

He reached for the coffee he'd poured and drank. Not that the caffeine would be good for his already jangled nerves, but holding the mug, inhaling the scent, feeling the steam on his face, all of it, was just one more ritual that help calm him. But even that wasn't enough, between lack of sleep, his emotions with Dani and now Gabrielle he was on edge.

He set down the mug and leaned back in his chair. When he'd come back from active duty, he'd had his own mandatory psych eval and there were things he that stuck from that time. He'd also spent so much time with Marshall in therapy sessions that he'd learned plenty. Not to mention all the time he'd studied on his own. Meditation, guided imagery, it all worked the same way. His rituals kept his demons at bay, he knew that. So now, he closed his eyes and pulled the picture that calmed him behind his eyes. It was something he'd been taught to focus on a long time ago and even now, he saw it all clearly; the water garden, the smiling Buddha, the koi in the pond, he heard the bamboo fountain, felt the breeze and his pulse slowed, his breathing evened and he felt the calm flow over him as usual.

He wasn't sure how long he stayed there, but a light tap on his shoulder woke him. He shook himself.

"Huh?"

"Boss," Xeno stood over him with a half-smile on his face, careful not to make it a full smile. "Looks like you fell asleep," He glanced over his shoulder. "No one else saw you."

"It was a long night." He straightened in his chair and touched the coffee cup; ice cold. "What time is it?"

"Almost nine." He motioned to the door, "I think everyone's about here. I sent Tommy out for some bagels. You need anything copied?"

Nico handed him the new duty roster. "Thursday's going to change, but yeah make copies for everyone. I'll be in soon, get coffee going too."

Xeno nodded and headed out the door.

Nico stood and grabbed his jacket from the hanger on the back of the door. He didn't notice that Dani ducked around his mostly open door until he turned around buttoning the coat.

"Dani." His voice was warm and he smiled. "What brings you to my office?" He watched her duck her head and blush. She was in a pair of well-fitting jeans and dark plum, v-neck sweater over a cami. The color complimented her well.

"I just wanted to say good morning." She closed the door behind her and then pressed herself against Nico a second later. His arms wrapped around her waist as she went up on her toes to kiss his chin. "And thank you for breakfast, which was really nice of you."

He smiled down at her and was relieved that she was here and against him. It made him feel better after his phone call with Gabrielle this morning and especially with her doubts last night. "You're welcome." He bent and kissed her softly, just tasting her upper lip with his and then teasing her lower before pulling back. "I have a meeting with the security team."

"I know. Ronnie mentioned something about that this morning." She winked at him. "By the way how's the knee?"

"It's fair, I took some anti-inflammatories and I'll have one of the trainers look at it later." He chuckled. "And Ronnie, well, I thought you'd find her…" he cocked his head to the side, "Interesting"

"I like her."

He stepped back. "Are you okay though?"

She nodded. "I'm processing, but if you're willing to give me time I'm willing to see what happens."

"I'm only asking for a chance Dani. Just don't shut this down before we see where it goes, even if it starts to feel too intense, that's all I'm asking."

She squinted up at him.

His eyebrow shot up and he gave her a crooked smile. "You're squinting; never good, so I better get going." He grabbed his iPad from the desk. "I'll see you." He kissed her forehead, pulled open the door and let her leave ahead of him.

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Dani headed to the GM's office with a small smile on her face. She hoped to avoid Matt and was glad when she did. Griffen answered when she knocked and was ready for her even though she was a bit early.

"Dr. Dani, glad you're early. Can I get you anything?" He half stood when she entered and then sat when she waved him down.

She held up her travel mug. "I brought my own."

"Sit, sit we have plenty to talk about" He shuffled through files on his desk and pulled some forward. "Nico filled me on your son. Things are under control then?"

She knew she turned red." Yes, sorry about that."

He shook his head. "It's okay. We all have kids and they get into trouble sometimes. On a scale of one to ten this is a one." He leaned close conspiratorially, "You've met TK, you've been to the jails at three am, you did know Mr. Pittman?"

She smiled and nodded. "It's just embarrassing."

He waved his hand. "As long as we keep it handled and it doesn't get you into trouble and Nico assures me it won't, then there isn't anything to worry about." He pushed a file across his desk. "This is what I have, it's the outline sent over from Mr. Pittman's estate, they move pretty fast, especially since they haven't officially read the will yet. However, it looks like this was in play even before then. I guess a letter was sent before he got on that plane, with notes that no matter what happened this was to go forward." He shrugged. "Who knows with Marshall Pittman."

For Dani it was simply more confirmation that Nico was right about Marshall's death being suicide. She opened the folder and read the cover letter. It laid out a plan for the foundation. She was named specifically as a lead resource to get it off the ground. She hadn't known Marshall had respected her that much. He wanted an office in each city the League had a team with a licensed therapist, psychologist or psychiatrist on retainer that was approved or recommended by Dani or one of her colleagues. This therapy would be open for the players and families and the care provided as a benefit.

The initial outlay for the planning was paid by and endowment made by Marshall to the Pittman Fund, but after a set number of yeahrs the League was expected to contribute a certain number of dollars to the fund, plus funds raised and that was when Dani stopped reading because it became a bunch of financial and legal mumbo jumbo she wasn't interested in.

Griffen had let her read and when she looked up at him he asked, "So, what do you think? Are you interested?" He was leaned back in his chair with his fingers steepled under his chin.

"Of course, why wouldn't I be?" She picked up her cup and took a sip of the still hot coffee, though it was starting to cool now.

"It's a lot of work to coordinate finding those therapists. The locations aren't an issue, the League itself can find office space. I'm not sure if we want to create an office in each city with a Pittman Mental Health Services or just have the players bill the fund as such when they use the service but refer them to a therapist much like we use your services at your office. I read through the plan and it seems like Pittman's dream was more physical."

She nodded. "Yeah, but I'm not sure we can afford a fulltime therapist in each city." She cocked her head to the side. "Possibly donate to a mental health wing of a hospital or subsidize a mental health inpatient or even intensive outpatient therapy location, but keeping that many full time therapists wouldn't be realistic."

He nodded and leaned forward. "I tend to agree, but do you have any ideas on how to see his goal through?"

She thought about it, reread his vision statement and paged through a few more pages of the plan. "What about a resource room in each training facility, something where the players or families could go stocked with self-help books, pamphlets and other resource materials. That could be carry the foundation's name easily, stay visible."

Griffen liked the idea and put it at the top of the list, of course nothing would be written in stone until the foundation board approved it, but Dani's recommendations would be added to the agenda and she would be invited to the meetings. She was flattered.

"I spoke with Gabrielle Pittman as well, she called me last night to notify us that there will be a memorial service and funeral Thursday. Mr. Pittman has asked to be buried in New York, so the funeral will be held here. The team will of course attend. She's flying in today and would like you to meet her later at her hotel suite. In fact, I'd just got off the phone with her before you knocked."

Dani sat forward and blinked. "What?"

"I said that Gabrielle Pittman has asked you to meet her later today at her hotel suite." He gave her an odd look. "Is that going to be a problem?"

Dani shook her head. "No, I'm just surprised."

"I don't see what's so surprising. Her recent ex-husband just died in a horrible accident, their daughter is known to be quite fragile emotionally and you are on staff as a therapist. Maybe it's to talk to Juliette, maybe it's not, I don't know. But since Ms. Pittman is currently the de facto owner of the Hawks, she is in fact your boss and I suppose you better be at her suite." His eyes had narrowed some at her. "Do you want a driver?"

"No, I can drive. Just text me the information and time I'm supposed to be there."

He nodded. "I'll have my secretary send it to your calendar then." He pulled something up on his computer. "Any problems with any of the other players?"

Dani rolled her eyes. "You know I can't discuss any of my clients with you."

"But you can tell me if any of them have come to see you, we did have that agreement."

"No we didn't. We had the agreement that unless you sent them to me, any time they came to me it was confidential." She stood, taking the file with her. "Is that all then?"

"I suppose it is." He stood and held out his hand. "Thank you for coming in." He shook her hand. "You'll be at Ms. Pittman's hotel later then?"

Dani knew she squinted this time because for some reason she felt a bit threatened. "Yes, I said I would go and I will."

He smiled and seemed to back off. "Good, good, then unless things get out of hand around here, I'll see you officially next at the funeral."

She nodded. "Yes, I'll be at the funeral." She saw him regularly at the office, she usually stopped in a few times a week, but she knew what he meant.

She left his office, hoping to run into Nico, but he wasn't around. She really didn't have any reason to stay in the office so she headed toward the door, but this meant she had to pass Matt's office and he was inside.

He saw her and stepped out. "Dani, hey."

She stopped and gave him a friendly smile. "Hi, how're things as the new official assistant GM?"

He shrugged. "Not much different than when I was the interim assistant GM." He leaned against the doorway. "What're you doing here?"

She motioned toward Griffen's office with the file. "Had a meeting with Griffen about this new Pittman fund thing." She shrugged, "I guess I'm supposed to get it up and rolling."

Matt reached out and clasped her shoulder. "Congrats, sounds like a promotion of some kind."

She rolled her eyes, "Sounds like a lot of extra work without any extra pay."

He chuckled. "Sounds like Pittman."

"From what little I know of him, I'd agree."

"So, how was dinner?"

There was something about his voice that made her look up at him. She crossed her arms. "Fine, why?"

He grabbed her arm, pulled her into his office and shut the door. "Don't give me bullshit about it just being dinner Dani." He leaned against the door and crossed his own arms. "I know you weren't home until late."

Her eyebrows pulled together and she snorted. "What are you stalking me now Matt?" She tried to push past him, but he didn't move.

"No, I stopped by your place around eleven because I was out that way and I had some of your things. Ray Jay answered the door and said you still weren't home."

"So? I'm a big girl, sometimes dinner goes late." She glared at him. "And since when are you just out my way Matt at eleven with some of my stuff that you could have given me today?"

"Who were you with, Dani?" He took a step closer.

"First, that's none of your business Matthew. We broke up remember?"

"Your car was still in the lot. I do see the security reports." He leaned over her. "The hot outfit, the hot looks between you and Careles…is there something I should know?"

"Again. It's not your business." She was getting angry at him, especially at his posturing and his aggressiveness. He was the one that blew her off first. She felt the tears behind her eyes. He used to care.

"I just don't want you getting hurt Dani."

His words said one thing, but his voice said another. Dani heard pain and his need to reflect that pain back to her in his words. She put a hand on his arm. "Matt, I don't want to get hurt either and I didn't want to hurt you, but I did when I broke it off with you." She shook her head. "It hurt me to do it. I loved you too you know."

He looked at her with puppy dog eyes, "You broke my heart Dani."

"That's exactly what I didn't want Matt." She put a hand on his cheek. "That's why I ended it when I did, before either one of us got hurt even more." A single tear ran down her cheek. "I need to go Matt."

He didn't fight her this time. He stepped aside and let her brush past him. Just as she opened the door he spoke. His voice was cold, and almost heartless in a way Dani had never heard Matt before. "So why is it that you kept climbing back into my bed Dani?"

She didn't stop, she wasn't sure she could have spoken even if she had. She headed toward the ladies room because she didn't want to be seen crying in the middle of the Hawks complex. The "Closed for Cleaning" sign made her curse so she turned and headed to the only other relatively safe haven she knew of, Nico's office.

He was rarely ever in it and it was quiet. She found it empty just like she figured it would be and unlike many of the other offices, he kept shades on the internal glass walls drawn. He also had a view of the outside, which was rare compared to most of the other offices.

She really didn't even care if Matt watched her come in here. She'd tell him to fuck off right now. She left Nico's door open and slumped onto the leather chair behind the door. She dug through her purse for a tissue, but only found a napkin from a fast food place, it worked well enough to dab her eyes and wipe her nose. After about five minutes, she pulled herself together and pulled a compact from her purse to check her face.

It was then that her phone chimed, almost simultaneously followed by a curious figure in an expensive suit entering his office with a chuckle.

"What are you…" His voice trailed off when he saw her on the chair, eyes and nose red from crying. "What the hell, are you okay?"

She nodded and then immediately the tears started again. "Shit…" she pulled a face. "I hate when I do this."

He knelt beside the chair. "Dani are you hurt?" He looked her over. "Did something happen to one of the kids?"

She shook her head. "No, No, I'm fine, kids are fine…just ran into…" She paused, she wasn't sure she really should mention the argument with Matt. "I just had a disagreement with someone."

Nico knew better. "You are a very bad liar." He got up with a soft groan, the knee hurt when he did that and retrieved a box of Kleenex from his desk drawer. "Here." He figured this had something to do with Donnally. "You didn't run into Matthew at all this morning did you?" He shook his head.

She looked panicked. "Nico, don't do anything."

"Why would I do anything Danielle, you didn't even talk to him." He sank into the other chair. "I assume in this nonexistent conversation he was very gentlemanlike, as always." He drummed his fingers on the arm of the chair and watched her face.

"He's hurt and upset and he's taking it out on me since I'm the person who hurt him." She sighed and let her head fall back onto the chair.

Nico leaned forward. "And leaving someone you loved didn't hurt you?"

She looked away from Nico because admitting to him that she had loved Matt was hard. She shook her head. "Of course it did."

"So, why can't he be an adult about it?"

She cast a sidelong glance at this man across from her. She wasn't sure how he could express feelings for her, want her and know she recently had feelings for another man, possibly still did and then discuss them with her so rationally. "Because, it's not that easy…it's messy and…ugh." She threw her hands up in the air in frustration.

"Why because after you broke it off you ended up having sex again?" His eyebrow was up and so was one corner of his mouth.

Her jaw dropped. "You know about that?"

He smiled. "You two are pretty easy to read and it happens to plenty of couples." Hell, he'd sworn Gabrielle off time and time again. He promised he wouldn't do that to Marshall over and over and then he'd end up back in her bed; her in his bed, whichever way that went. "I've been down that road." He took Dani's hand, "And it takes two to tango Dani, you didn't drag him kicking and screaming; trust me."

"Then why do I feel so horrible?" She wiped her eyes with the back of her free hand. "I want to stay friends with Matt. I like him Nico, I mean I did before all this and I still do, if we can get past this."

He shook his head. "He needs to figure that out on his own. If he can, then the friendship will survive. If not," He shrugged, "then no matter what you do or say it won't happen. It's not your fault his dream and yours didn't mesh and honestly he should be thankful you were upfront with him about it, but he's got to realize that on his own."

She nodded. "I know and I know he's been with someone since we broke up…I called one night and he blew me off. I just didn't call him on it, maybe I should have."

Nico didn't smile, but he wanted to, at least Dani was perceptive. "I'm glad I didn't have to tell you that."

"You knew?" Her eyebrows rose.

He nodded. "I know if it relates to what goes on around here." He waved a hand. "And his who definitely relates to what goes on around here."

She made an "O" with her mouth and then the light went on, "The reporter…"

Nico touched his nose and then stood up, "I think the deal for our TK replacement may have been finalized in the bedroom."

She wrinkled up her nose in distaste. "Ick, okay I didn't really want to know that."

He held out a hand to help her up. "I told you there were things in people's past you were better off not knowing."

She bit her lip and cocked her head to the side. "You mean there are other skeletons in Matt's closet?"

"He's a pretty boy Dani; I won't say the Hawks haven't used that pretty face and body to their advantage on occasion." He wiped a smudge of mascara from her face. "He never seemed to mind."

She shivered as a thought occurred to her. "The Hawks didn't use him to court me did they?"

Nico's left brow rose. "I was at the club that night, but was under orders to not follow Donnally because I was babysitting some players. That's all I know." He tucked a piece of hair behind Dani's ear. "I did a background check on you after he brought me your name, which was after he'd slept with you I assume."

She shook her head. "I'm going to believe they didn't do that to me because this job has been good for me…" She smirked and then straightened the lapel of Nico's coat absently, "Mostly anyway."

Nico checked his watch. "I have a lunch meeting at noon, you're welcome to join us if you'd like."

She shook her head. "I had a client call and since the office is clear of bugs and the tapes are back, I scheduled them in at one. I need to get back." She rubbed the back of her hand across his cheek. "Mm, nice and smooth," she reached behind his neck and pulled him down to press her cheek to his. She whispered against his ear. "I bet that would feel really nice against my thigh too." Then she pressed a kiss to his cheek. "Call me later, please."

He cleared his throat. "Absolutely, and the funeral is Thursday."

She stopped by the door. "I know." She sighed as she remembered. "Gabrielle has asked me to meet her at her hotel tonight at," she pulled her phone from her purse to check the appointment that was sent to her calendar. She accepted it and opened the date, "seven." She looked at Nico. "I'm not looking forward to that."

Nico groaned inwardly. "I'll be there," he held up his phone. "I confirmed the same meeting before I found you in my office. Do you want me to pick you up?"

She shook her head. "No, I'll just meet you at the hotel."

He nodded. "Okay, quarter till in the lobby then?"

"Sounds good," she turned to leave and then paused. "Oh, I almost forgot," she giggled a bit, "what was the deal with the quote from the elf last night?"

He couldn't help but smile. "It may not be book club material, but when I was younger I read the hell out of fantasy series and one of the characters was Tanis, who was Half Elven. He uses that line in one of the books; I think it's the second book, _Dragons of Winter Night_. He may be imaginary, but the wisdom is sound."

She shook her head. "At least I know what you meant now. See you around seven then." She waved and pulled open his door.

Nico watched her leave and then moved to his desk. He sat, lifted the receiver and hit the button that connected him to Donnally.


	9. All Fall Down

**_NOTE:_**So, here I am again. More story, no smut, but I'm fine with that and I hope you guys are too. Things are just too serious for smut right now. Gabrielle shows up, plenty of her and she's such a treat. We get some background on her and Nico. And then there's poor Juliette, but you can read for yourself, I suppose.**  
**

No funeral in this chapter, not sure if it'll be in the next because I still have plenty of plotting to do, Ray Jay's fate is still hanging in the balance a bit, poor kid...I probably need to put that to rest, you know for his peace of mind ;)

Thanks for reading and hope you all enjoy! No beta, mistakes my own...and if you own Necessary Roughness please don't sue because I have no money, just a Honda Civic, a loan on my house and some student loans :D

_Again, special thanks to Lattelady for use of Nico's Loft, I'm only borrowing her work there (with a bit of creative license) and for what it's worth my descriptions do not do her's justice._

* * *

**All Fall Down**

Matt picked up the phone on the second ring. "Donnally."

"Can I see you in my office?" Nico wanted home field advantage.

"Now? There's game film to review in five minutes Nico, you know the schedule."

Matt sounded annoyed and Nico smiled. "It's important. There was an incident last night with Swisher and Hancock." Of course, that was only part of the reason he wanted to see the other man.

Matt sighed in annoyance. "Is it serious?"

"I'd rather discuss it with you in person."

"Fine, I'll be right there."

Nico hung up and sat back in his chair to wait. It was less than a minute before Donnally was in his office. Though, his tastes were much more pedestrian than his own, it still struck Nico as odd to see the other man in a sport coat on a regular basis rather than the old training uniform.

Matt dropped into the chair across the desk. "So, what trouble did Hancock drag Swisher into this time?"

"They were arguing over a stripper. I guess Swisher was willing to pay more for a lap dance. Hancock wasn't happy so he decided to try to knock him out." He watched Matt's face tighten. "Of course, they got bounced, but the fight continued in the street. I guess from what I'm told, fight is not really the correct word, more like Hancock's beating of Swisher continued in the street." Nico slid some pictures of Swisher's injuries across his desk to Matt. "As you can see, he won't be playing on Sunday. You might want to release something like a concussion from practice as the reason to the press."

Matt pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed as he looked at the pictures. "Any charges?"

"Swisher- none and I talked him into dropping his assault charge against Hancock, but the club is considering charges against Hancock for some damages, but legal is trying to work out an agreement involving payment and the two of them never setting foot in the establishment again." He pulled forms from an envelope and tapped them. "I already have the security tapes and signed non-disclosures from the club and everyone involved. Luckily, they were in the VIP room, so there weren't many witnesses inside. Outside, well we never really know what with smartphones these days." He shrugged. "So far, nothing's shown up on TMZ or YouTube."

"Okay, as long as all the charges get dropped and this clears the media we discipline both quietly with fines as usual and I suppose a game suspension for Hancock; good job." He looked at Nico. "Is there anything else?"

Nico closed the file and set it aside. "Actually, yes." He sat back. "Dr. Santino was in my office a few minutes ago and she was in tears. I know you two have been in a relationship that is now over, but I need you to keep the fallout out of the office."

Matt glared across the desk and then snorted. "Really Nico? You're going there?"

Nico's eyebrow rose. "Since the safety and security of the entire Hawks organization is my responsibility, yes I am going there."

The other man shook his head. "Like you're not sleeping with her?"

Nico's eyes narrowed. "What I am and what I'm not doing with Dr. Santino are none of your business, just like what you did and didn't do with her were none of mine, but when how you treat her affects how she does her job, it becomes my business." He stood and walked around the desk to lean against it beside Matt. He looked down at him. "It's none of my concern if you walk out this door right now and screw your secretary on your desk, just as long as she's willing, but if she suddenly bursts into tears and can't answer the phone, then you will find out just how concerned I become."

Matt stood, refusing to be intimidated. "You have no idea what you're talking about. We had a messy break up and things are emotional, sometimes things get heated. That's all it was Nico, so just let it go."

"Dr. Santino was crying in my office because of the way you treated her while in this building Matthew. That makes me very concerned."

"Are you threatening me?"

Nico shook his head. "No, I'm telling you how it is." He crossed his arms. "I need her able to do her job, which means she needs to be clear-headed, especially right now with everything going on." He leaned closer and lowered his voice. "She's my friend, so I also don't want her hurt."

Matt made a disgusted sound in his throat and moved toward the door. "Keep me posted on Swisher and Hancock." He gave Nico a calculated, narrow-eyed look, "I'm sure she's 'just a friend' and you don't want her hurt." He rolled his eyes, "but word of advice Nico; watch your six; she'll hurt you and you'll never see it coming."

Matt was gone before Nico could even respond.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Dani sat on the chair and watched her nervous new client on the couch across from her in the consultation room. "So, tell me what brings you to see me."

The attractive middle aged woman, who was fiddling with her hands, looked up suddenly like she was startled and then looked down at her lap. "Um, well…" She picked up a pillow from the couch, set it on her lap and began to stroke it. It seemed to calm her. "I'm a dog handler. You know, professionally for the dog shows. The AKC, Westminster, a few other of the big ones. I do the circuits and I win…well I was winning." She frowned and her stroking faltered and then started up again. "Now, I can't even get in the ring with totally screwing the pooch." She laughed at her pun. "Sorry, handler humor…I don't know." She shrugged and looked up at Dani. "The dogs don't do what I want, I trip, I can't seem to get their gait right." She sighed, looked around the room and then back at Dani. "The last poodle I had in the ring is usually a sweetheart, but she bit the judge. I think she should have won, but we didn't because of that. I should have had a better handle on her, should have had more control." There were tears in her eyes. "Now, no one wants to use me. Clients are finding new handlers." She wiped her eyes. "Even my own partners don't want me working my own dogs."

Dani nodded. She knew a limited amount about dog shows, less about handling dogs, but obviously there was skill involved. "Did anything happen recently during a show any traumatic event or something outside the shows?"

The woman, Maggie, shook her head. "Nothing I can think of. Sunday we won Grand Champion and then the next week everything went wrong and ever since it's been all wrong." She started crying.

Dani moved to sit beside her. "I promise we'll figure it out."

Maggie looked up at Dani. "I hope so, my dogs are my life and I don't know what I'll do if I don't show."

_One hour later_

Dani said goodbye to Maggie after setting up her next appointment and picked up her phone. There were three texts.

Two were from Nico: "Picked up Ray J's car. Will deliver to school 4 him," and "See you tonite."

The other was from Ray Jay. "Tkx 4 car, cu home."

She had no idea how Nico had gotten him the keys, but he had and she was thankful for that. She glanced at the time. Ray Jay and Lindsay should be home soon. She still needed to call Ray, she was angry that Ray Jay wasn't able to get a hold of him when he'd needed him and she knew she needed to discuss the problem with him as well.

She dialed his office and when the secretary answered she asked to speak with him. Of course she was put on hold and ended up waiting longer than was probably needed since she was the ex-wife.

"Danielle, I hope this is important because I've already asked you not to call me during business hours."

If looks could kill the one she made would have made him drop dead. "Ray, shut up. Why didn't you answer your phone Sunday night? Ray Jay was in trouble and he tried to call you six or seven times over several hours and you never answered."

There was a pause. "I…well…I was busy and figured he just wanted money."

She snorted. "Did you bother to listen to the messages?"

"Of course, he said there was an emergency, but come on Dani he's a seventeen year old boy, an emergency usually means he needs fifty dollars to take a girl out or buy a new pair of jeans."

"Maybe if it was Lindsay, yes, but not Ray Jay, god Ray he was in jail. He needed help and he called you because you were probably better equipped than me to actually help him…"

"Wait a damn minute," there was a muffled sound and then voices and then he was back, "just because I work with a bunch of lawyers, doesn't mean I actually know anything about the law Dani…and back the hell up and tell me what he was arrested for."

"It's a long story, but a friend convinced him it would be fine to plant two marijuana plants in my yard in exchange for a stake in a fantasy football team. There was an argument, Ray Jay told the kid to get the plants out of the yard, the kid refused so Ray Jay dug them up himself with the intention to take them to the dump. Unfortunately, the other kid had knocked out Ray Jay's taillight and he was pulled over. The officer saw the plants and well, he was arrested for possession of the plants."

"Oh my god, he's never going to college, he's old enough to go to jail as an adult…" Ray started hyperventilating.

"Ray, calm down." Dani was now very happy that she was the one who did get the call and extremely happy that Nico was with her when she went. She suddenly wondered who she actually would have called first; Ray or Nico. "That's not going to happen. I've taken care of things. The most he'll get is a misdemeanor charge for possession and he may not get that either."

There was silence on the other end of the line. "Did you hire a lawyer? Are they going after the other kid? Should I talk to one of the guys at the firm?"

Dani shook her head. "No, like I said, I've got it handled Ray. The Hawks have lawyers and I have access to them. They're good at things like this and the other kid has a history with police. I doubt Ray Jay will even do more than pay the fine we paid already. We'll be okay, I just wanted you to know and ask you to please answer your phone next time." Or not, since things did turn out much better this way.

"Yea, yea, of course…you're right I should have answered. I was just, busy."

Dani wanted to throw up. She had been busy too, but she answered her phone…well sort of. "I'm sure she was very stimulating Ray."

"God Dani do you really have to be that crass."

"Do you really have to be that obvious?" She stuck her tongue out like a five year old. She knew it was immature, but it made her feel better.

"I'll pick the kids up on the Friday."

"I'll make sure they're ready, bye Ray."

"For what it's worth, I'm sorry I wasn't there for them. I really wasn't thinking it was a big deal and figured he could get you if he needed to, I mean it was your weekend." He was transferring his guilt back at her.

Dani sneered and then sighed; she hated having a psychology degree sometimes. "Parenting is a fulltime job Ray, even for divorced parents."

"Okay, you win…as usual."

"I'm not trying to win Ray. I just don't want the kids to think you aren't there for them, especially Ray Jay. He needs a man in his life and it would be good if it was actually his father."

"Well, like I said, I'll be there to pick them up Friday. Okay?" He sighed heavily.

"Okay, see you then." She hung up with a frown, she wasn't trying to send him a guilt trip, but she was angry and frustrated with him. He should have been there for Ray Jay and he wasn't, but an almost stranger had been. She put the phone on the counter with a heavy sigh. "God this week has sucked so far…"

She let her head rest on her folded arms and caught a glimpse of the scotch bottle still sitting on the counter across the kitchen. A small smile crossed her face and warmth crept into her veins. "Well parts of it…" She whispered against the goose bumps on her forearms.

She retrieved the bottle and a small glass, and poured a bit of the scotch into it. She took her time sniffing the strong, earthy scent and then she sipped it trying to discern the flavors in the liquor that made it worth two hundred dollars. It was strong and peaty. She swallowed and made a face. "God it still burns, ugh."

She moved to the sink to add a bit of water, her mother always added water to her scotch, so maybe there was a reason. With the next sip she cocked her head to the side and closed her eyes. She caught the flavors of oak, licorice and dark chocolate. She swallowed more slowly this time and smiled, the water changed the taste. It still burned, but the flavor seemed to open up and it was much better this time. Like when you baked chocolate chip cookies and the house filled up with deliciousness, her whole head filled with the flavors in the scotch now. She experimentally took another sip, swirling the liquor on her tongue, finding the flavors again and savoring it. Though she still didn't love it, she could understand why Nico did. She finished the last sip and decided she'd look into buying him a bottle of something as a gift. That is if she could find out what he liked.

She heard the front door and Lindsay telling her brother that he was idiot. She sighed, some things never changed. She set the glass in the sink and turned to see face the kids. Ray Jay held up his keys.

"Thanks mom." His smile was ear to ear. He threw an arm over her shoulder and gave her a quick side hug before heading to the fridge. "I've never been so happy to be called to the office before." He pulled out the orange juice. Dani was already pulling glasses from the cabinet, and as he sat at the counter and pulled a glass toward him, he continued, "Thanks, I was shocked you got it out so soon though. I figured you'd leave me car free as a punishment." He poured juice and drank.

"Ray Jay, do you think you're going to be able to go anywhere except school?" She crossed her arms and leaned against the counter. "Besides, each day you keep a car in impound cost money." Which reminded her, she needed to find out how much she owed Nico.

Lindsay reached for the juice and poured herself a glass. "Um does someone want to fill me in on the drama?"

Dani shot her a glance. She had to tell her daughter something. She sighed and moved to the counter to sit in one of the stools. "Your brother got himself into some trouble this weekend and his car was impounded."

"Dude, what did you do?" She laughed and slapped him on the shoulder. "Were you texting and driving again?"

Ray shot his sister a wide eyed look.

"Ray Jay, so help me if I ever find out you've been doing that you won't need the car put in impound, I'll sell it."

"Mom, I don't. Not anymore, I swear." He held up his hand. "By the way, I ran into Tyler and he was all friendly and fine, of course he doesn't know I pulled up the plants, so once he finds out that might change." He shrugged and finished his juice. "What's for dinner?" He looked around. It didn't look like she'd been cooking or had anything out. "We picking something up?"

"Whoa, first I told you not to talk to him."

"He's in two of my classes mom, I can't exactly NOT talk to him and his locker is right across from mine he waited on me after class. He wants to come over, I told him no. He said then tomorrow and I said probably not and walked away. He told me he had to check on his property and I didn't answer him. Like I said, he obviously didn't believe me when I told him I was digging the plants up." He looked across the counter. "Really, dinner what's it gonna be because I'm already hungry and need to know if I should snack now or hold off for something good."

"I have to be in the city for a client by six thirty so I'll leave some money and you two can order pizza or go to Maricelli's or McDonalds if you want, I don't care, but I'm worried about Tyler if he thinks the plants are still here and he finds out they aren't he's going to be angry Ray Jay." Dani was beyond worried.

Lindsay interrupted. "What's the deal with plants…are we talking about marijuana because everyone in school knows Tyler's into drugs."

Dani shot Lindsay a look. "How did you know and your brother not know?"

She shrugged. "I don't know, but if you want to party, you go to Tyler. He can get you what you want. That and he's a total sleazeball." She shivered and made a disgusted face. "I told you to keep him away from me."

"And I told you I would. Has he talked to you since then?" Ray Jay asked.

She shook her head. "No, not since you punched him."

Ray Jay sat back in his seat with a cocky smile on his face.

Dani looked shocked. "You punched him? Why? When? You know better than to hit people Raymond Santino Jr."

He rolled his eyes. "Mom, Linds told me he hit on her. I told him to lay off and he said something about her being a hot piece of…well, he made a rude comment, so I laid him out flat." He shrugged, "I told him he wasn't allowed to look at her that way, talk to her, go near her or even think of her that way or I'd cut off his…" He blushed and stopped. "Well, again…he left her alone."

Inside Dani swelled with pride and she wanted to smile, but she knew she still had to be the logical adult in the situation. "I appreciate you protecting your sister and you still wanting to hold on to your friendship, but punching Tyler probably wasn't the best course of action. It's obvious that Tyler has serious issues and he isn't someone you should be spending time with Ray Jay."

She looked to Lindsay and took her hand. "He didn't hurt you did he?"

She narrowed her eyes, "No mom, nothing like that, he's just a creep and it was cool that Ray Jay punched him." She smiled, "you should have seen it."

Dani did smile now, she couldn't help it. "I bet it was cool." She looked over to her son. "You do need to watch out for him Ray Jay, please. Especially now that he's looking for his property and it doesn't exist."

He nodded. "I'll be careful." Then he bent his arm and flexed his bicep, "but he better watch out or I'll knock his ass out again." He winked.

"Watch your mouth." Dani shoved his shoulder with a smile. "Get your homework done, both of you." She shooed them both from the kitchen and picked up their glasses. She was feeling uneasy and worried about the Tyler situation. She'd bring it up with Nico later. Right now she had some session notes to finish.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Nico sat in the lobby of The Hotel Plaza Athenee and waited for Dani. He was early since he'd taken the subway from his apartment seeing it was quicker than trying to find parking in the city this time of night. He checked his watch again, it was only six thirty. He'd already done his recon. Gabrielle was here with Juliette, he was relieved by that, but his heart was already breaking for the girl. He had no idea what he was going to say to her.

He glanced up as someone came toward him, hoping it was Dani, but it wasn't. He crossed his legs and leaned back into the couch, trying to get comfortable. He glanced around the lobby. It was a bit pretentious for his taste. The furniture was all heavy gold, neo classical with bright purple and green murals he felt were gaudy; it was a style he didn't care for at all. He much preferred clean lines and minimalism. He'd been in the hotel before, the lobby put him off, but he didn't mind some of the rooms. He sighed and looked toward the door. Dani had already seen him and was heading his way.

He smiled and stood, a bit stiffly, his knee was bothering him some. He moved toward her.

"Danielle." He opened his arms and she stepped into his embrace.

"Mm, I missed you." She pressed her face into the slight scratch of the wool of his overcoat. The temperature had dropped just a bit outside. "You smell good." She looked up at him with a smile.

"Maybe it's the mothballs?" His eyebrow rose and he bent to kiss her, he chuckled when she made a funny face. "I'm teasing. I have a section of cedar in my closet for the wool. It makes everything in it smell like the cedar."

"It's not just that." She pressed her nose against him and inhaled. "It's the cedar, your cologne and just you. Makes me want to bite you." She winked at him.

He bent to her ear and growled. "Maybe later, now we have a meeting with the ex-Mrs. Pittman." He sighed. He looped her arm through his and guided her toward a bank of elevators. "I checked and Juliette is with her. She's going to be emotional and Gabrielle is going to be manipulative. I'm not even sure why I'm here with you, but it's actually possible that Gabby is concerned about Juliette. She's been known to be maternal from time to time." He pressed a button twelfth floor. "You ready for this?"

Dani nodded. "I'll be fine. Are you okay?" She was worried about Nico. This wasn't going to be easy on him and she wasn't sure he realized how difficult it was going to be. "I want you know I'm here for you."

He smiled and squeezed her arm. "Thanks. I'm actually glad you're here."

The elevator doors opened and they boarded it after a couple with two dogs exited. Dani rolled her eyes at the older woman cooing at the animals which made Nico laugh.

"This place is pretty ritzy."

Nico smiled. "It's indulgent; yes."

She rolled her eyes. "I assume you've stayed here before."

He cocked his head to the side. "Not as a guest."

She squinted.

He pointed at her eyes and opened his mouth, but then there was a soft ding and the elevator doors slid open. "Our floor," he stepped to the side and motioned for her to exit ahead of him.

"Saved by the bell?"

"Perhaps I was or maybe you were…" he answered her cryptically and once he was out of the elevator he stepped around her and led her to a door. He glanced over to her and took a breath. "Are you ready to face the dragon lady?"

Dani nodded. "As ready as I'm going to be, and she's not going to be that bad…is she?"

Nico gave her a wry smile, "Oh, she can be." He knocked on the door and took a step back to stand beside Dani.

Dani was nervous now. She wanted to grab Nico's hand, but she didn't dare, instead she fussed with her clothes. She'd changed into a pair of black slacks, but had kept the same sweater from earlier. She'd added a dressy leather jacket and jewelry as well as different shoes and a scarf. The difference was the look changed from casual to something business appropriate, but she was second guessing herself now.

Nico leaned over, "You look fine. I should have said it sooner."

She smiled just as the door opened.

Gabrielle Pittman stood there looking immaculate. "Nico and Dr. Santino," she opened the door wider and stepped aside, "thank you both for coming. Please come in."

Nico waited for Dani and then followed her in. "Is Juliette here?" He asked, though he knew the answer. He was testing her.

Dani watched them square off against each other. There was so much tension between them it was vibrating in the air. She glanced into the living room area, but didn't see the girl. She didn't stay there, but walked into the suite. She had to admit, it was beautiful. Much different than the suite that Nico had taken her to at the Marriott. The design was European and the furniture was gorgeous. She ran her hand over the upholstery as she took in the wall covering and tried not to think about how much the silk wall covering cost per yard.

She glanced behind her and noticed that Nico was having a rather heated, but hushed argument with Gabrielle at this moment. His face a mask of barely controlled contempt and anger. Dani wished she could throw the woman off the balcony she was sure was somewhere in this suite. She bristled and almost gagged when Gabrielle put one hand all too intimately on Nico's chest and her other on his waist. She took half a step toward them and was interrupted by a small voice from the hallway.

"Nico…"

The voice was quiet, hoarse, weak and so desperate that it tore at Dani's heart.

Nico stepped around Gabrielle and was suddenly in the hallway. He pulled the frail girl into his arms and cradled her head against his chest just before he scooped her up and carried her to the couch. He set her down and took the time to shed his coat before he pulled her back against him to let her cry into his hundred dollar shirt. He glanced up at Dani.

She saw the anguish on his face, his obvious heart breaking love for the girl and then watched his eyes dart to her mother. She was shocked to see how quickly his hazel eyes darkened with hatred before they looked back to the Juliette and softened. Dani watched the tenderness replace the malice as he pushed the young woman's hair away from her face and pressed kisses to her temples telling her it would be okay and asking her how she was all at the same time.

Dani stood there feeling helpless and out of place, like a third wheel on a date or worse a date at a funeral. She glanced at Gabrielle and was shocked by the jealousy on the woman's face. Dani realized for the first time how much the other woman hated the love between Nico and her daughter and resented it. Dani squared her shoulders and moved toward the woman.

She didn't really want to be concerned about this woman, but she'd do her job. "Are you doing okay?" She asked softly.

Gabrielle glared and shook her head before moving to the kitchen to pull a bottle of white wine from the ice. "Do you see that?" She motioned into the living room. "I can't get that man to look at me with one-tenth the passion he looks at that girl and he isn't even thinking about fucking her."

The crudeness of this woman about knocked Dani to the floor. This was her daughter, her dead ex-husband's best friend and the man she led to believe could possibly be the girl's father and…Dani shook her head. Professional detachment be damned, she couldn't help herself from blurting out. "Lady, you have some seriously messed up thinking." She looked back at the man and girl on the couch. Nico was tucking his jacket around Juliette's shoulders and smiling sadly at her, but she'd stopped crying and even smiled up at him. "How do you think he's going to look at you after what you put him through?"

Gabrielle drank a full glass of wine and poured a second, glaring at Dani as she did. "So, he told you about the baby daddy drama did he?" She laughed acidly. "Figures, poor, poor Nico, makes himself out to be the saint doesn't he? But he was cheating with his best friend's wife all that time too, you know."

"He loved you." Dani hissed at her."

The other woman snorted at her. "Then why the hell did he give me up? Cast me off to Marshall?" She looked back at the couch and then took her wine and moved toward the enclosed terrace.

Dani followed her. Gabrielle sounded hurt and angry. They ended up in a small atrium with a beautiful view of the city, especially now at night. Dani took a breath. "Wow…just wow."

Gabrielle gave her a genuine smile. "It is beautiful isn't it?" She sat on a small chair and stared out into the city. "I ask for this suite every time because I like this view even better than the one from the penthouse." She sipped her wine.

Dani watched her. "Why do you say he cast you off?"

Gabrielle kept her vigil on the city. "Because he did, he kept pushing me at Marshall even though I was in love with him and up until then I thought he'd been in love with me." She looked over at Dani. "I was pretty sure he was going to ask me to marry him. I saw the ring. It wasn't anything special, but I would have said yes. I loved him." She looked around the room. "I was always rich, but I wasn't always this spoiled. I made Marshall buy me things because I deserved them after what they did to me." She leaned forward and set her glass on the table between her and Dani. "Marshall never made me happy; at least not the way Nico did." She wiped at her eyes. "So, when I realized Nico was pushing me at Marshall, I was angry. No matter what I said and how I begged, he wouldn't stop doing it." She stopped and took a drink.

Dani was amazed. This was more than Nico would ever share with her. She knew he'd given up Gabrielle because Marshall had loved her, but she didn't know Gabrielle had been in love with Nico and not Marshall. No wonder the woman was bitter. "How did that make you feel?"

She made a disgusted sound. "How would you feel if the man you loved and wanted to spend your life with started pushing you to someone else without a good explanation?" She shook her head. "He never told me why, or even really broke it off with me. He'd show up, kiss me, push my skirt up, fuck me senseless and then tell me I needed to go out with Marshall on Friday, go to the gala on Saturday with him…whatever. I'd be so out of it I didn't know what the hell to think. I wanted to keep Nico in my life, not Marshall-Fucking-Pittman. I didn't need money. I had plenty, so Marshall's money meant nothing. I know Nico's family had none, but I didn't care, but he kept bringing that up and sure, my family cared about that, but I didn't."

Gabrielle picked up her glass, played with it, rolling the wine around inside and then she tossed it back and put the glass back on the table. She tucked her feet up under her with a sigh. "My family liked Marshall, he could be charming and while I didn't love him, between my family, Marshall's persistence and Nico's insistence I finally gave in. I married Marshall with the intention to torture Nico; make him realize how much of a mistake he made. I figured I could always get divorced." She shrugged and turned back to the city. "I decided I'd do everything I could to make Nico jealous and I did. Hell, I fucked Marshall in front of Nico more than once just to piss him off. Only it didn't do what I wanted."

Dani inhaled. "Oh my."

"Are you shocked?" Gabrielle turned and gave Dani an evil smile. "Turns out Marshall enjoyed a bit of voyeurism, among other kinks."

Dani's stomach turned now, but she kept her judgment to herself. Of course she knew Marshall enjoyed watching, or in her case listening since he bugged her damn office. But the roles were switched with Nico watching, she suppressed a shiver and hoped it hadn't gone any further than Nico watching; she definitely wasn't going to ask. She shook her head to clear the image her imagination brought to her. This woman was twisted, and for all she knew this entire story could be a ploy to manipulate her.

Dani took a breath. "Please continue."

Gabrielle smiled smoothly and watched Dani's face. "Well, what really matters is that it didn't do what I wanted. Nico didn't go into a jealous rage. He didn't drag me away from Marshall. Sure, he'd screw me when Marshall was away, but then when I talked about running away together, he wouldn't do it. I hated him for that. I still do; fucking coward. So, eventually I stopped trying to get him to leave. I gave up. I just started using them both. When I got pregnant I used that to manipulate him for as long as I could. He's not like other men. I can't get him to do what I want, at least not for very long and it pisses the fuck out of me."

Dani nodded. "So, you're angry at him because he rejected your love and you're jealous of his relationship with your daughter?"

Gabrielle nodded. "Pretty much what every therapist I've ever seen has told me. Yes." She looked out on the skyline again. "I'm also narcissistic almost pathologically, but I prefer to just be called a bitch."

"Do you care how all this affects your daughter?" Dani glanced down the hall.

"Are you insinuating that I don't care about Juliette?"

Dani shook her head. "Not at all, but you admitted that you have a strong narcissistic streak, that means you think you're personal happiness is paramount to everyone else's. You don't have much empathy for other's feelings, you feel you're entitled to things above other people." She shrugged. "So, do you even realize how your actions affect Juliette? Do you see how what you do and say hurt her?"

"She's not even around me most of the time." She glanced back to Dani and rolled her eyes. "When she was little she preferred hanging on Daddy's leg or begging Nico to carry her around to spending time with me and then when she got older she was getting laid, drunk, high…whatever made her feel good."

Dani tried to keep her face neutral. "And don't you think that she spent all her time with her father and Nico because she didn't feel a connection with you? Do you think maybe her acting out with sex, alcohol and drugs, especially at a young age, were because of the relationship or lack of one she had with you?"

Gabrielle did laugh now. "So, now I am a horrible mother." She stood up. "Oh, you, Marshall, Nico and all those other therapists, you all want to pin Juliette's problems on me. Maybe it's because of Marshall's defective, fucked up genes. You scientific types ever think of that?" She swept her wine glass up from the table and headed back toward the kitchen. She paused in the doorway. "Oh, and by the way. You're here because I need you to make sure Juliette doesn't kill herself while she's out of the loony bin." She pointed at Dani. "That's your job until I get her back into the hospital. Keep her little ass alive and hopefully semi functioning during the funeral. Then I'll have her committed again. That's it." Then Gabrielle moved back up the hallway.

Dani sat there and blinked. She had never met anyone so cold hearted, so blinded by hurt and hate before that she couldn't see anything else. She swallowed the bile in her throat and fought the tears of frustration. She was frustrated for Juliette and for Nico. She couldn't give a damn about Gabrielle Pittman. That woman made her own hell.

She forced herself upright and moved back into the living area. Gabrielle was nowhere to be found, the wine bottle was gone and the bedroom door was closed. Nico and Juliette were still on the couch. They were chatting comfortably at this point. Nico had drawn Juliette out some and she was sitting up with his coat draped over her shoulders.

He stood and held out his hand when he saw her. "Dani, thank god she didn't eat you alive."

Juliette rolled her eyes.

"She probably could have." She moved toward the pair and smiled at Juliette. "Hey Juliette." She sat on the couch beside the girl and immediately pulled her into a hug. "I'm so sorry about your dad."

Juliette, gripped Dani and held tight. "Thanks…damn I just stopped crying." She whimpered a bit and groaned as she pulled back and wiped her eyes sniffing. "I wish I could get a hold of myself."

Dani shook her head. "You don't have to, it's okay to cry." She wiped the girl's cheeks lightly and wrapped an arm around her shoulder. "You need to grieve."

The girl snorted. "Gabby keeps telling me to be strong and suck it up."

Dani bit her tongue. "Well, Gabby didn't just lose her father." What she wanted to say was that Gabby could go to hell, but she didn't. She looked at Nico over Juliette's shoulder.

He'd been crying and he wiped his eyes.

"Juliette, do you feel comfortable staying here with your mom or would you rather stay with Nico or me?" Dani asked, her eyes never leaving Nico's face. She didn't care if it pissed off Gabrielle if Juliette left. First, the girl was over eighteen, so legally she could do what she wanted and second, Danielle didn't think it was healthy for her to stay there.

Nico's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "You're more than welcome to my loft Juliette."

Juliette lifted her head from Dani's shoulder and looked to Nico, "Really?"

"Yes, on the condition that you don't use."

She pulled a face and crossed her arms. "I'm clean."

He frowned. "Don't lie to me, you're half wasted now and I know the difference between heroin chic and heroin user." He sat on the ottoman and grabbed Juliette's arm, even though she protested. He shoved her sleeve up to expose her arms. There were three fresh needle marks he'd caught the glimpse of earlier. "How long after you got out today before you shot up?"

She glared at him and pulled her arm back. Her voice was heavy with guilt. "Dad just died Nico, give me a break and mom wanted me calm on the plane."

Rage flared behind Nico's eyes. "Did your mother give you the drugs?" His jaw was clenched, his hands fisted. He leaned closer, his voice low and more dangerous than ever. "Juliette answer me goddammit."

Juliette cowered on the couch beside Dani and closed her eyes. She was shaking.

Dani wrapped her arm around the girl and gave Nico a cool look. "Nico, take a breath." She tried to keep her voice calm, but Nico's anger was ferocious and she suddenly understood that she never wanted to see his bite. Ever. She took Nico's hand and pried open his fist. "Nico, look at me."

It took him a few seconds, but he his eyes shifted to Dani's.

"Hey, don't take it out on Juliette." She shook her head. "And now is not the time." Her fingers traced over his knuckles.

He nodded and gripped her hand. "Thank you." He stood and ran his hand through his hair. God, he'd almost lost it. "But Juliette, did your mother actually hand you the drugs?"

He asked from across the living area. He was calmer now, in control. More like the Nico Dani knew.

Juliette nodded against Dani's shoulder. "She told me I could have it if I behaved."

"God, I'm going to kill her one of these days." He paced across the space and then back. "What the hell is her problem? She admits you, detoxes you and then as soon as you're out she's got that shit right back in your veins."

Dani cleared her throat. "We won't be able to detox you before the funeral, but I can get you into a Methadone clinic in the morning. I have a friend who runs one. If you agree to see me, we can get you in for short term stabilization and then after the funeral readmit you for detox."

Juliette nodded. "It'll be better than going without. I'm already jonesing."

Nico was calm now. "How long have you been using?" He sat back on the ottoman. "I mean more than your usual alcohol and pot?"

She thought for a few seconds and closed her eyes. "I don't know. I tried pills off and on here or there. Mom always had percs, vics, xanies and whatever and so you snort those and then next thing I know some guy says, try shooting this, it'll get you high like the percs, but faster; harder. And it did Nico. Made me forget all the shit with mom and dad and all the things I let the men in my life do to me." She looked away from the hurt on his face. "I hate that it hurts you. You're the only one it ever hurt…maybe it hurt dad, but he was always so fucked up himself, or so pissed at mom that he seemed to forget that I was the reason he was pissed." She pulled her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. Her chin was on her knees. "I'm sorry I let you down. You were the only reason I ever tried to stay clean."

Dani looked at Nico and saw pain on his face. That vulnerability was back, along with something else, something deeper and harsher. She watched as big fat tears rolled down his cheeks unchecked and she was forced to wipe her own eyes.

Nico cleared his throat and swallowed. "Juliette, do you remember what I told you when I dropped you off at rehab that day?" He reached for her hand. "I told you not to do it for me when you said that's why you were going, but to do it for yourself. That's the only reason you'll ever stay clean. If you keep doing it for me, it's not going to stick. You'll just keep going back to the drugs to hide from those demons." He wiped his face with his other hand. "I don't deserve your loyalty Juliette," he shook his head, "I've never been able to protect you. I've never been able to keep either one of your parents from hurting you. I'm not your superman or your savior. I'm a lousy excuse for even a body guard."

Juliette launched herself at Nico. She hugged him and pressed her head to his chest. "And I told you then it was a shame you never had kids…that you would have made a good dad. I always wished you'd have been mine." She choked back a sob. "I mean fuck, not like now, I mean god…" She sobbed as her grief hit her again. When she'd found some control over it she sniffed and continued. "You were always there for me when I needed you. I know why you couldn't do everything. Mom and dad wouldn't let you. Even that day you dropped me off. Dad would have fired you." She pulled back and kissed his cheek. "It's okay Nico. You did the best you could in a totally fucked up situation and you tried to protect me. I know that. They used us…we were both their pawns…"

"Isn't this sweet?" Gabrielle's voice dripped venom from across the room.

Nico pulled away from Juliette. He pressed a kiss to her forehead, threw a warning look at Dani and then stood and turned on the other woman. "Gabrielle, what's your endgame?"

She snorted and finished her glass of wine with a flourish. "What do you mean? You're the one fondling my daughter. Maybe I should call the authorities?"

He rolled his eyes. "That's rich Gabby." He strode toward her. "Would you like for me to tell them about the heroin in your room?"

She blanched. "I don't know what you mean."

"You can lie to other people Gabrielle, but not me and Juliette isn't very good at lying at all." He took the wine bottle from her hand and emptied what was left down the drain. "You've had enough by the way."

She tried to pull it from his hands. "Nico, that's two thousand dollars a bottle."

He smiled. "Twenty-five hundred actually, but it doesn't matter, I want to know why you detoxed Juliette and then handed drugs over to her hours after she's out." He boxed her against the wall and leaned over her. "What is it you're up to?"

She licked her lips and shook her head. "Nothing and I don't know what you're talking about. If she shot up, then she was hiding drugs in her room or something."

His eyebrow rose. He still hadn't touched her, but he wanted to. He wanted to strangle her. "How do you know she shot up then?"

Her eyes darted to her daughter and Dani. "Well, that's what I put her in for, I mean she threatened to OD on the shit, so I figure that's what you're talking about and then you said heroin in my room." She laughed nervously. "So what else would we be talking about Nico?"

She'd lost control of the situation and Nico was savoring it. She so rarely lost control. Oh, there were times in bed when Nico had had full control and it was one reason she'd started limiting their time together. Sure, she'd tease and flirt with him, but when things started progressing she'd stop him. It left him frustrated and angry and he'd never force her. "I know you better than that. I would hope your security would do a better job searching her room before she came back." He frowned. "I mean I either trained or approved them all, they would know where to look to find her stash. I would have found it." He pulled out his phone. "Who searched her room? Give me their name, I'll have them gone in ten minutes."

He looked back to Juliette. "Who's your personal guard right now Juliette? Who did your dad assign to you?"

Juliette shook her head and she started crying again. "Don't Nico, it wasn't his fault and I actually like this one."

He shifted his gaze back to Gabrielle and slid his phone back into his pocket. "So, if it wasn't a security fuck up Gabby, it was you." He stepped back and headed into her room.

Gabrielle followed behind him, hitting his back and yelling at him, threating to call the cops and to kill him. "Nico, get the hell out of my room, you fucking bastard. You filthy piece of shit…how I ever let you crawl between my legs I'll never know!" She picked up a vase and threw it at the wall. It missed Nico's head by six inches.

Dani followed them up the hallway. She wasn't sure why, but she did. She didn't know if she could help or she'd be in the way, but she was worried things might get out of hand again. Dani flinched when the vase exploded against the wall and she heard Juliette cry from the living room.

Nico turned and pinned Gabrielle to the wall by her arms. He was breathing hard. His hair was wild, his breathing erratic. He looked to Dani. "Keep her out here with you or I'll hurt her."

Dani swallowed and nodded. She grabbed the taller woman's arm and held on as Nico entered the bedroom, shut the door and locked it. She expected Gabrielle to fight her but the other woman suddenly went limp and started crying. The next thing she knew, Gabrielle Pittman was sliding down the wall sobbing hysterically. Dani sat beside her and tried to calm her.

A minute or two later Juliette appeared in the hallway and Dani lifted her other arm. Even with all the pain between them mother and daughter reached out for each other and Dani couldn't stop her own tears at that point. The three women sat there crying, huddled on the floor outside the bedroom of a luxury suite trying to find what comfort they could from each other.

What seemed like an eternity later the door swung open and Nico strode out. He was greeted by the three women on the floor. It was not what he expected. Fingernails, hair, maybe even all out massacre would have been more along the lines of what he'd expect, but definitely not all three women hugging and crying together. He shook his head, stepped back into the room and then back out. No they were still there. "I thought maybe I walked into an alternate dimension."

Dani looked up and gave him a watery half-smile. "Don't try to understand it." She held out her hand and he helped her up. "And no, it doesn't mean we are friends or even on friendly terms." She turned and helped Juliette up and then used the pointy toe of her shoe to roughly nudge Gabrielle. "Hey, you want help or not?"

Gabrielle flipped her off and then took her hand. She then looked at Nico with hatred. "Did you get what you wanted?"

He held up a small case. "Yep, nice hidey hole by the way." He sneered. "Who would think to check inside your vibrator." He then held up a pair of latex gloves. "Glad I always come prepared for dirty work."

Dani snickered.

Gabrielle growled and took a step toward him, but Dani put a hand on her chest. "Look lady, do you really want to do this? I mean he just found drugs in your luggage, your daughter is high, your fingerprints will be on the drugs. I'm tired, we're all emotional, you're drunk, we have things to do. Can we finish this argument later?"

The woman backed off with a glare at Nico. "Oh, but we will finish this Careles."

He moved down the hallway with Juliette tucked under his arm. "I'm sure we will Gabby and by the way Juliette is coming with us. She doesn't feel comfortable here."

Gabrielle brushed past Dani. "She's what? Like hell she's going with you. She needs to be with her family." She rounded on Nico.

Nico sent Juliette into her room to get her things. "I'm as much her family as you are. I was her bodyguard and may as well have been her nanny Gabby, so don't start with me. She's almost twenty, she can go where she wants and I don't trust her with you after what you did to her. She needs to straighten up and you obviously aren't getting her clean." He waved the case in front of his face and then moved closer. "Which makes me wonder. If she stays dirty, what's the will say?" His eyebrow rose. "Is there a clause about that? Do you get to control the assets if Juliette is deemed incompetent?"

Dani watched the other woman turn pale and reach for the counter. Nico hit the nail on the head. Dani gasped, "Oh my god, you wouldn't…"

Gabrielle looked to Dani with a snort. "Oh hell you stay out of this and do what I asked you to. Hell what I pay you to do."

Nico glanced at Dani. "What does she want you to do?"

Dani shook her head. "She told me my job was to keep Juliette from hurting herself while she was here, keep her functioning at the funeral and as soon as they got back home Gabrielle was going to have her recommitted. Of course this was before I'd talked to you and Juliette."

Nico's smile was cold. "You'll never get the chance Gabby. I'm not letting you near Juliette from now on. If she needs help," he motioned to Dani, "Dani will coordinate her care. I know she can't provide it all, but she can make the referrals and when Juliette gets out, she comes here. Not to you. Dani is a certified addiction specialist she knows the signs to look for once she's out. She needs supportive people around her, not someone who will sabotage her at every turn."

Juliette rejoined them then. She looked from her mother to Nico and Dani. "I'm going with them Gabrielle, it doesn't matter what you say."

"You're such a brat and always more trouble than you were worth." She glared at the girl. "Why didn't I listen and have that abortion, god I wouldn't be in this mess would I?" She pulled a bottle of red wine from the counter and started opening it. "Well, take her and get the hell out of my suite. All of you."

Juliette bit her lip to keep the quivering at bay and it broke Dani's heart. She put her arm around the girl. "Gabrielle, I'm sorry."

She snorted and waved a hand. "Sorry for what Dr. Santino?"

"I'm sorry you have no love in your life, it must be really lonely." She turned and guided Juliette toward the door, but paused and looked over her shoulder. "There were people who tried to give it to you, but you were too stubborn to take without reservation. You had to have it on your terms, your time table, and only when and if it suited you." She shrugged. "Now you've lost everything and everyone that ever meant anything to you…if you're not careful Gabrielle you'll lose yourself too."

Nico didn't say a word but gave the woman he loved so long ago a sad smile and then shook his head and left her alone with her wine and her regrets.


	10. Highs and Lows

_**Note:**_

Some more emotional stuff here and then some smut...the belt makes a reappearance ;) No beta...again blame me I am my own very poor editor.

Again, I have to thank Lattelady for Nico's loft as it exists with some license in this fic. Its layout is hers and only a few specifics are mine. If it's super cool and architectural, then it belongs to her. Hell, even the oak floors, Mission furniture, black leather sofa, Chinese art collection, all of that is hers. The glass block wall, loft office that opens to bedroom and living room, all that is hers too. Oh and there's more I didn't add in...tin ceiling tiles, oriental rugs, marble counter tops, cherry cabinets. Other things I didn't include are that it's in the Village somewhere on Bleeker street._ Like I said, I couldn't write a better place for him, so I didn't. She wrote the loft so well to his character I didn't dare try to write it any different._

Things she didn't include, but I'll add, is that from the sound of her description the apartment is probably prewar and if you've never had the chance to see those apartments you're missing some seriously gorgeous pieces of American historical architecture. So, if you're ever in the neighborhood... ;)

* * *

**Highs and Lows**

Twenty minutes later Nico directed Dani into his parking garage. He was glad she'd driven. He had her park beside his Lincoln and then he sighed. He wasn't used to this. He glanced into the back seat to see Juliette huddled in a ball against the driver side door. She didn't look well and he wondered when her last hit had been. He looked to Dani.

"How long do you think?"

Dani knew what he meant. She shrugged. "Depends on how much she had been using before she went in. I mean she wasn't clean for long and then how pure was what she used to get high, how much she was used to using before she detoxed and how long she'd been using before she went in." She shook her head and looked over at him. "You can detox her, but she's not going to function for the funeral. She probably won't even be stable enough to show up."

He rubbed the back of his neck. "I know, but I hate to let her shoot up again. It's counter productive."

"You know I can hear you two, right?" Juliette said from the backseat. "I'm not dead or asleep."

Nico chuckled. "Yes, so what should we do?" He turned around so he could see her.

"Well first, can we get out of the car? I need to pee." She opened the door passenger side door and stepped into the garage. She stretched and made a face, opened Nico's door. "And, we can discuss my recovery upstairs, where it doesn't smell like exhaust and piss."

Dani smiled, "She has a point and well, she has to pee."

The three of them headed to the elevator and then up to Nico's loft. Dani had to admit, she was a bit excited. There was something about seeing Nico's home that sent a thrill up her spine. She didn't exactly know what to expect, but when he opened the door, it wasn't the loft in front of her.

It was obvious that Juliette had been there before because she headed in and went off toward what was probably a bedroom area calling out the name, "Onyx" as she went.

Of course, Dani had no clue what an onyx was, but when a ragged black and white cat pounced after the girl's trailing scarf, Dani almost jumped. "Oh…it's a cat."

Nico smiled. "Yes, he's a cat." He bent and scooped said cat from the floor and held him up. "Dani, meet Onyx. He's a bit of a trouble maker I that rescued from the trash compacter out back when he was a kitten." He scratched the cat's chin and frowned. "His litter mates weren't so lucky." The cat pawed at his hand and Nico smiled. "Between his coloring and the fact that he was sitting on a bag from the Onyx Café, it seemed an appropriate name."

Dani let the cat sniff her hand and then scratched behind his ears with her nails. He purred and then squirmed to be put down. When his feet were on the floor he rubbed his face against her shin. "Oh well, at least I'm wearing black." She shrugged.

"Which is what I usually say when he does that to me," Nico smiled at her good natured response and then watched the cat head over to Juliette, who was back from the bathroom. He figured she was his second favorite person in the world, or for all he knew the cat's favorite person and he only tolerated Nico. "You know Juliette, I think he pines for you between visits."

She nuzzled the cat's face and rolled onto her back on the large black leather sofa so he could curl up on her chest, which is exactly what he did. "Then you should let me have him Nico. I only ask every time I visit."

"Never gonna happen." He took off his coat and held out his hand for Dani's. "We have a few things to talk about. Do you want me to take your jacket?"

She bit her lip, he was right. She wasn't sure it was a good idea for Juliette to be here alone with him. Juliette was not sober, Gabrielle was manipulative, and things could get misconstrued or worse. She didn't know how to bring it up. She nodded and took her coat off. She watched Nico hang both jackets neatly over the backs of the mission style dining room chairs and then he moved to the kitchen.

He was already prepping the espresso machine. "Latte?" He asked as he reached for beans and a grinder.

Dani pulled out her phone, it was already after nine. "It's late…"

"I know, I have decaf too if you prefer." He paused and looked at her. "It's up to you, but you still have the drive home." His look smoldered.

Dani shivered. "Reg…" She cleared her throat. "Regular is fine, you're right."

He looked over the living room. "Juliette?"

"Do you have to ask?" She rolled off the couch, setting the cat to the floor gently. "Do you mind if I take a shower?" She picked up her bag and started toward the bedroom door.

Dani moved quickly and grabbed her arm before she disappeared. "Whoa." She took the bag from her shoulder and pulled the girl back toward the kitchen. "I'm going through your things before you go in there. Right here, in front of you." When Juliette started to protest she held up her hand. "This isn't my first time Juliette. You're using, you'll lie, cry and do whatever it takes to get what you want. When I'm done going through your stuff. I'll watch you strip and then check your clothes."

The girl went red, her eyes welled up and she looked to Nico. "Are you going to let her treat me like this in your house?"

Nico shook his head. "Isn't this what they do in rehab Juliette?"

She crossed her arms. "This isn't rehab Nico. I thought you trusted me."

He rolled his eyes and leaned his elbows on the breakfast bar so he was closer to her. "Do you want to get clean?"

She looked away and bit her finger nail. "That's not it..." She ran a hand through her sweaty hair. "I just hurt right now and I can't think about anything else."

Dani looked to Nico. "How long has it been since you shot up?"

Juliette shrugged. "I don't know, before we got on the plane. It was just the once this morning and it was early. Mom had me out at like seven so around eight, but it wasn't much."

"What's with the three needle marks then?" Nico pulled her sleeve up. "You really that bad at hitting a vein?"

She pulled her sleeve back down and looked away. "One's old Nico, from before mom put me in. I wasn't shooting up recently until dad went missing. I wasn't exactly clean either, but I wasn't shooting up again, but then…god, it was bad Nico." She started crying and it took her a minute to gain control of her emotions again. She wiped her face on the sleeve of the robe. "But this morning after mom got me out, we were fighting." She bit her lip and looked away. "I told her if she would have let me go dad wouldn't be…it was her that made him kill himself, I know he killed himself. She gave me the letter he left me. It just says he loves me, but I know what that means. So, she…we were fighting about it and I hit her, told her I was going to kill her one day because she killed dad and I knew she believed me and then she told me she'd give me something to help. Handed the drugs to me, told me if I behaved like a good girl I could have it and I knew it would make the hurt go away. Make the hole in my heart and my head stop so I did it." She looked at Nico desperately. "I swear, I only shot up that once. I was going to shoot up again after we got to the hotel, but I heard you and mom fighting…" She started crying and wiped her face, "that's it and I really didn't use much at all today. Just used enough to calm me this morning and make me forget…and my hands were shaking so bad I didn't hit gold my first try and had to go for seconds."

Dani pushed the bag toward her. "Where is it?"

She sighed and unzipped the weekender. She pulled out the makeup kit and then a smaller cloth roll. "Here, it's my set." Then she fisted a small vial. She pushed her fist across the counter and then opened it slowly. "God, here take it before I change my mind…"

Nico grabbed the vial and emptied the contents into the sink, turned on the water and flipped the garbage disposal on. "Gone."

Dani hugged the girl and together they went through the rest of her bag piece by piece. Then she followed her into Nico's bedroom and bathroom, and made sure her clothes were clean of drugs. Then she left her to shower.

Nico had a latte ready for her when she came back.

She smiled and followed him to the couch. She sighed and sat, "Thanks." She took a sip, "Wow, that's really good."

He sat next to her and slid his arm behind her to rest on her shoulder. He bent his head to her ear. "No, thank you." He kissed her hair. "For everything today." He sipped his own drink and let his head rest on the couch. "I called Ronnie while you were in the bathroom with Juliette. I can't stay here alone with her, not with Gabrielle on the warpath." He rolled his head to the side to look at Dani. "Actually, I'll stay at the Marriott and just let Ronnie stay here with her, but Juliette doesn't know that yet."

Dani let out a relieved breath. "I was going to bring that up with you." She sat up and found a coaster. She put her cup on it and faced Nico. She took his hand. "Juliette is vulnerable now, she's liable to try things and with the way she feels about you...I'm afraid she'll…."

Nico leaned up and pressed a quick kiss to her lips. "Shh, I know." He sat back. "She's Gabrielle's daughter Dani, and as much as I love her like a daughter, she's not my daughter." He wiped a hand over his weary face and took another sip of his espresso. "I see how she looks at me sometimes. There's a glimmer of more than daughter like love there."

"You really do read people amazingly well." She reached for her cup and drank some more as she glanced around the room. "And by the way, this apartment; it's amazing too."

He smiled. "I'm glad you like it." He motioned to the glass block wall. "It was the open feeling with the glass block wall that sold the place to me. It goes the entire length of the loft and it lets the light in during the day. You can't get that just anywhere."

Dani's eyes followed the wall, it was basically floor to ceiling and it did indeed extend the entire length of the place. The floors were warm oak and Dani took in the antique Chinese art. "You collect Chinese art?"

He nodded. "I collect what I like, but those pieces happen to make me feel good."

She stared at one of the silk wall hangings, it looked familiar, but she wasn't sure why. She stood and walked to it. She touched it. "Is this old?" She looked over her shoulder at him.

He shook his head. "No." He frowned some; he wasn't sure why she was so interested in it.

She lightly ran her hand over the large central character on the silk and then traced it onto her hand. "It's the one you traced on my hand in the police station." She started at him and then the piece on the wall. In the corner she saw initials. NC. "You did this?"

He shrugged. He didn't like discussing himself in so much detail.

"It's excellent work Nico, I mean really good." She moved away from the artwork and back to the sofa. "Chinese calligraphy work like that takes years of practice."

He shrugged again. "It's a hobby."

She shook her head. "I'd say it's probably a bit more than a hobby, but since it looks like you'd rather not discuss yourself and we do need to talk about Juliette, let's change the subject."

He sat up and leaned his elbows on his thighs. "I still have the case from Gabrielle's room." He was emotionally exhausted. "You said you can get her into a Methadone clinic in the morning?"

Dani nodded. "I'm positive I can call in a favor, as long as I can guarantee she won't use and I know we can do that."

He dropped his head into his hands. "God, I don't want to make this decision."

Dani rested her head on his shoulder. "It's not really much of a choice. She'll suffer tonight if we don't let her use, but she'll make it until the morning, but Ronnie's night won't be easy." She took Nico's hand. "If we let her use tonight, she'll have a much better night and tomorrow we start the clinic."

Nico looked up as Juliette came back into the living room. He noticed that she was wearing one of his robes and had her damp hair pulled up in a messy knot on top of her head.

She looked even more gaunt and frail than before. She was extremely shaky as she moved to the arm chair across from them and sat. She tucked her bare feet under her. She bit her lip. "You have to help me…" Her red rimmed eyes filled with tears again and she wrapped her arms around herself and rocked back and forth. "It hurts so much."

Dani gripped Nico's hand. "It's up to you, but it'll get worse."

God he knew, he'd watched men go through withdrawal before. It was easy to find drugs in Iraq, after all the country exported some of the best heroin there was. His Seal team had seen some horrible things. He closed his eyes, he'd seen…he'd done some horrible things too and he understood the desire to forget. He knew the draw of a drug that would make everything float away, cocoon you in warmth and numb your brain. Marshall had chased that dragon and Nico had followed him into that hell and dragged him out more than once. Maybe it was because of his psychosis or maybe it was just a personality flaw. Either way, Nico had flushed his drugs, held him down, and cleaned him up after he detoxed several times.

He looked to Dani. "I can't let her suffer." There were tears in his eyes. He knew he couldn't do the same to Juliette, there was no way he could watch her, shit, make her go through that same hell.

"I know, it's okay." She shook her head sadly. "I wouldn't be able to do it to Lindsay or Ray Jay either."

Nico got up from the couch and went to the dining room. He fished the case he found in Gabrielle's room from his coat pocket. He looked at Dani. "I'll take her into my room. You probably don't want to watch this."

Dani suddenly felt sick. No, she didn't, but Nico probably didn't either. She swallowed and gripped the arm of the couch. "Are you sure you do?" Of course someone needed to be sure she didn't overdose herself.

Nico shook his head, his eyes slightly vacant. "Have you ever done this?"

Dani gave him a puzzled look. "Helped someone shoot up?" She shook her head, her eyes wide, "No."

"Then, I'm the only one who can do it." He gently slid his arm under Juliette's shoulder. "Come on, sweetheart." He glanced at Dani. "Ronnie will be here any minute, check the monitor by the door before you let anyone in and then lock the door behind her." When Dani nodded he led Juliette to his room, but he didn't bother to close the door behind them.

Dani stood nervously because at this point there was no way she could sit. She picked up her cup and sipped her latte as she strolled around Nico's space and tried not to think about what Nico was doing with Juliette in his room. She'd already decided that she wasn't going home tonight, so she found her purse. She pulled her phone out and dialed home.

Lindsay answered. "Mom, hey."

"Linds, how are you?" Dani wiped her eyes, thankful that her kids were home, healthy and not using drugs. "I love you."

"Um, yea mom, love you too, and I'm fine. Are you okay?"

Dani sniffed. "I'm fine, sort of, just my client isn't and I'm going to have to have them admitted and I can't really leave her right now."

"Oh, so you what, aren't coming home. Wow, you haven't done that in forever…like since never."

"Yea, I know. This one's bad. Are you and Ray Jay going to be okay home by yourselves?" Dani fiddled with an envelope on the counter. She was still worried about the Tyler issue. She sighed. "Is the alarm set?"

She heard Lindsay walking.

"Mom, we'll be fine." There was a series of beeping sounds. "And, it is now, and yes, all the doors are locked and it says code one, ready."

Dani smiled. "Okay, good and no one comes over and you call me when you leave for school in the morning."

Dani imagined her rolling her eyes.

"Okay mom, okay…and no parties either I promise."

There was a knock on the door. "I love you Linds and tell Ray Jay I said the same, okay, but I need to go."

"Love you too mom, call you in the morning, bye."

Dani was walking toward the door, "Bye." She hung up and checked the small security monitor by the door.

She saw Ronnie in the monitor. She was looking down the hallway, her arms crossed over her chest as she leaned against the wall opposite the door. She smiled like she knew someone was watching. Dani figured she probably did. Dani flipped the two deadbolts and opened the door. "Hey."

"Hi, doc." Ronnie pushed away from the wall and entered the apartment. She glanced around. "Nice place." She slid deeper into the loft, her hand drifting over the furniture lightly as she passed it. She paused by the couch and glanced around. "Boss here?"

Dani nodded. "So, did he tell you what was going on?" She relocked the door and followed Ronnie.

Ronnie nodded and slid the messenger bag on her hip a bit further toward her back. "Enough, he sounded pretty harshed up about it." She shook her head. "Needs me to babysit an old friend's daughter. I'm guessing she's young and pretty?"

Dani's eyebrows pulled together and she nodded.

"And, her last name is on my paycheck?"

Again Dani nodded.

Ronnie sighed. "I heard some rumors about Mrs. P's daughter having trouble with drugs…boss said on the phone she was using heroin." She frowned. "Shit's hard to kick."

Dani nodded. "You use in the past?"

The other woman shook her head. "Nah, not H, but I used plenty of other shit, but not for a long time. I cleaned up when I ended up pregnant, well everything but the damn smokes." She slapped the patch on her arm and a small smile lifted her cheeks. "Hugo definitely wasn't anything I planned on, but he was pretty much the first really great thing to ever show up in my life, him and Angie. Without them I don't know where I'd be."

"Hugo and Angie?"

Ronnie sat on the couch and opened her bag. She pulled out her phone and scrolled through her photos. She found one of a little boy about three or four. He was dark skinned with close cropped curls and soulful chocolate eyes. He was smiling and waving with one hand while holding onto a dirty stuffed penguin with the other. "Hugo is my son, well Angie's and mine now." She scrolled again and then there was another picture, this one of the same boy being held by a pretty, fair skinned, petite woman with freckles, in green scrubs. Her hair was short and highlighted with reds and blonds. Hugo was hugging her and pressing a messy kiss to her cheek. "This is my partner Angie."

"Oh." Dani didn't really know why she was mildly shocked, but she was. "I guess I didn't realize you were…"

"Gay…" Ronnie laughed, "It's okay. I don't know if you're straight." She smiled when Dani opened her mouth. "I'm kidding, I'm kidding. I mean I know you're at least bisexual, since you're screwing my boss."

Dani blushed. "How did you know that?"

Ronnie smiled. "I didn't until just now, but I suspected. Anyway, it doesn't matter, because he'll break my kneecaps if I said anything." She took Dani's hand. "I work for Pittman Enterprises, but I was hired by Nico Careles, that's who I'm loyal to. He's gone out of his way to do right by me and I'll do the same for him. Trust me, your secret is safe." She squeezed Dani's hand and then let it go. She glanced toward the bedroom. "Is he in there with her?"

Dani nodded.

"Giving her wings?"

Dani gave her a puzzled look.

"Is he helping her shoot up?" She moved toward the bedroom.

Dani nodded. "He was, yes, but I'd guess they'd be done now."

Ronnie frowned. "That shit sucks, let me check on him, hang here."

"I'm not that fragile."

Ronnie paused by the door and frowned, "It ain't that, just you can't un-see some things…you know?"

Dani nodded, yes, she did know, and as a therapist she often wished she could help other people un-see things all the time. In this case, she wished Nico didn't have to be in the bedroom at all with Juliette.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Nico's hand was shaking by the time he was done, but he was done and he was thankful. With a gentle tug the tourniquet, which he'd already loosened, pulled away from her arm and carefully he slid the slim needle from the vein in the bend of Juliette's elbow and pressed a clean tissue to the small puncture. He knew she was already starting to float. He saw it on her face, the peace, the glow. He looked away almost ashamed; it was like watching her cum.

"Boss…"

He looked up and then quickly away because he didn't want Ronnie to see his tears. Warily, he capped the syringe, grabbed the blue tourniquet and the kit he'd set on the bedside table and shoved all of it into his pocket. He wiped his eyes.

Ronnie gripped his shoulder. Her strong hand lent him some strength. She just held on, squeezed and then released. "You good?"

He nodded. "Yea."

"You look like you need a drink, I'll watch her. She'll probably sleep a bit anyway." Ronnie pulled the coverlet at the end of the bed up over the girl and tucked her now gaping robe closed. "What's her name?" She sat on the bed beside Juliette and brushed her hair off her face.

Juliette turned her face toward Ronnie and lifted a hand to trace a tattoo that started on her collarbone. "Mm, nice ink…" she giggled and her hand moved lower to Ronnie's breast.

Ronnie grabbed her hand. "Whoa baby, I don't think so. I don't get grabby on the first date and I like my girls a bit older." She smiled and squeezed Juliette's hand. "You're cute though." She winked. "I'm Ronnie and you're…"

"Juliette."

"Okay, Juliette how about you bliss out for a while and I'll read some and then later we'll watch some TV or something?"

Juliette looked to Nico and her eyes not quite focused. "You're not staying are you?"

He shook his head. "I can't and you know that."

She bit her lip and looked away and then she curled up on her side and around Ronnie.

Nico looked at Ronnie.

She motioned at him to leave. Her voice was quiet. "It's okay, get a drink and when you're ready let me know what I need to about the system and go."

Nico moved to the door and was surprised that Dani was there. How much she'd seen or heard he didn't know. She stepped back and he pulled the door mostly shut and then moved to the kitchen. His movements were sharp and agitated as he pulled a bottle of scotch from a shelf and poured himself a glass. He stood there and sipped it with his eyes on the counter. He was tense and angry at himself for being forced to do something he didn't want to do and he felt a bit like he was abandoning Juliette even though he knew he had to leave.

Dani watched as her heart broke for him. She moved to stand behind him, her hands sliding around his waist. "I'm sorry, Nico."

His free hand settled on her hands at his hips and he set his glass down before he turned. His let his hands slide down her sides and then pressed his forehead to hers. "God, I'm so sick of today." His nose traced over hers and then his mouth hovered near hers. "I just want it over."

Dani leaned closer, her lips grazed his. "Me too…" she gasped at the contact and then she repeated it; just a brush of her lips against his.

This time Nico wasn't satisfied and his hands slid into her hair as he tilted her head to angle her mouth to his. His tongue found hers and he took control of the kiss. He pulled her bottom lip between his teeth not so gently biting and then soothing, sucking and licking before he violently thrust his tongue into her mouth as he pressed his hips to hers and backed her up to the island. He couldn't get enough and pulled back to take a breath and he caught her eyes. "I need you…I" He didn't voice more of his desperation, but he felt it. He needed her, wanted her, he didn't want to be alone right now, but wasn't sure how to ask.

Dani moaned and pulled his head back down, she understood. She kissed him and she wouldn't make him ask. One hand in his hair while her other gripped his ass and she ground against him. She pulled back, kissed his jaw. "Nico, it's okay…" she kissed the small V where his shirt opened and inhaled his scent. "I called home." She pulled back to focus, because she was losing it. She shook her head some. "I can't think this close to you…" she put a hand on his cheek and looked him in the eye. "I told the kids I wasn't coming home. It's okay, I need to be with you too."

With a groan he pulled Dani back against his chest as his mouth covered hers and he fought a battle with himself. A war rose in him, twin needs that both ultimately could be, and would be, soothed with sex, the one that was at the forefront was the primal need to dominate, control and fuck. To take his hurt, anger and frustration out on a willing partner. Shit, that is what he needed and wanted so desperately right now. The other, weaker need was also there, it was the one that wanted to thank this woman, this wonderful, giving woman who just spent hours with him and a girl he loved, a woman he hated, and who had been there for them both of them. He was pretty sure Dani would be turned off by him for wanting the first, fucked up fantasy in his head.

He pulled back from the kiss and rested his forehead on hers as he caught his breath. He was panting. His eyes were closed and he was rock hard. He had meant what he told her that first time together. He liked to be in control, he had wanted to do things with his belt…that thought made him groan and he stepped back and put her at arm's length.

"Shit…I'm dangerous to you right now Dani." He took a shaky step backward and picked up his scotch. He walked around the counter, putting it between them. He added two fingers of scotch to the glass and took a sip, watching her as she caught her own breath and stared at him in confusion.

"What?" She moved toward him shaking her head. "Don't you dare tell me that Careles. You told me you would never hurt me and I know you meant it." She stood in front of him and poked him in the chest. "Don't act like a coward now because you're afraid of something you're feeling." She squinted up at him. "And yes, I know I'm squinting."

He chuckled, drank another sip and shook his head. "You're playing with fire Danielle."

She raised an eyebrow. "I can handle a little heat, I told you I wasn't an innocent schoolgirl and I meant it."

"If you're challenging me, you might want to be careful." He put his glass down and pulled Dani toward him suddenly. He roughly pinned her arms behind her back and bent over her. "I'm feeling a bit violent Danielle, I warned you about my penchant for control in bed before." His eyes raked over her, and he bent to press his teeth to her throat. When she shivered he pulled back. "I want to see you helpless, begging me." Saying the words hit him hard and his voice caught an edge, his vision went a bit unfocused and he spun her. Bending her over the counter and pressing into her from behind. His mouth to her ear, his voice was husky as he kissed and nipped roughly at her ear and neck, "I want you on your knees for me Danielle…god I want to see your back arched under me, my hand in your hair, as I fuck you on your knees…"

Dani whimpered. She was so wet and her knees went weak with need. "Nico, please…" She tried to pull her hand free to reach for him. She wiggled her bottom toward him. She didn't care what he did. She wanted him. She nodded. "Yes…"

He released her, "There's more Dani…" He growled as he pulled her upright and kissed her rough enough to bruise her lips.

She kissed him back with just as much passion and then withdrew, gripping his hair, pulling it. "I don't care." She looked him in the eye. "Tonight is about what you need." She palmed him through his pants and smiled when he groaned. "I need you just as much. It doesn't make sense, but you make me want things that freak me out anyway." She smiled. "Tell Ronnie what she needs to know and call a cab."

Nico gave her a hard look. "Are you sure, because once we leave…"

She cut him off. "Nico, I've made up my mind…I'm not signing up for a lifestyle here, I'm saying yes to you; to the man I trust with my life." She kissed his cheek. "So, get Ronnie, call the damn cab and let's get the hell out of here." She reached for his glass and took a long swallow. It was different than the scotch at her house. "Oh, that's not quite as…" she licked the flavor off her lips. "It's smoother."

Nico smiled and pulled her back against him. "Well at least you're learning to appreciate good scotch." He kissed her nose. "That one costs a hell of a lot more than the one at your house, but then it's not something I drink every day either." He put the bottle back up and finished off the last in the glass. "Okay, let me explain the security to Ronnie, grab some things and we'll go before you change your mind."

Nico went into the bedroom and came out with Ronnie who followed him up the tight spiral staircase to an office loft that overlooked not just the living room, but the bedroom below. While Nico explained the security system and set up a nanny code for Ronnie, Dani slipped into the bedroom to check on Juliette.

The girl was lying on her side facing away from the door.

"Juliette?" Dani sat on the edge of the bed. "You doing alright?" She touched the girl's shoulder.

Juliette rolled over slowly. Her eyes were unfocused from the drugs still heavy in her system and they were a bit wet. "I'm not hurting." She stretched and smiled a little bit. "But I'm pissed at Nico."

Dani tucked the girl's hair behind her ear. She looked so young right now, like the little girl she was. "Your mother would use it to her advantage. Start something in the press, make it sound like something inappropriate was going on."

The girl bit her lip and looked up into the loft when she heard Nico's voice.

Dani looked up too and saw Nico looking down at them, there was a frown on his face and then he turned away to tell Ronnie something. Dani looked back to Juliette. "It's not that he doesn't care about you, it's because he does."

"I know…" She grabbed a pillow and hugged it to herself. "I just…it doesn't matter. Ronnie's cool, I like her and I know he'll be back in the morning. You said a clinic right, you won't let me hurt tomorrow right?" Juliette grabbed Dani's hand.

Dani shook her head. "No, as soon as the clinic opens I'll talk to my friend and we'll get you in. I promise." She bent and gave the girl a hug. "I programmed my number into your phone. You call if you need me, okay?" She pulled back.

Juliette nodded. "Okay and make sure Nico's okay. He didn't look good helping me get high." She looked away saying that. "Fuck, the things I do to people I love…" Her eyes teared up and she wiped them. "Shit's leveling off…functional here I come."

Dani pressed a kiss to her forehead. "Try to eat something then will you because I know you threw everything up before you showered."

She rolled her eyes, "Ronnie already told me she was making me eat, but okay, I promise you too."

"Good, then I'll get Nico to his hotel and see you in the morning." Dani left the bedroom just as Nico was heading in to grab some things from his closet.

Dani pulled the door closed to give him some privacy and sat on the couch with Ronnie who was reading from a study guide for the LSAT.

"You mind if I bother you?"

Ronnie glanced up from her book. She put her pen in her page and shut her book to give Dani her attention. "Nope, whacha need?"

"Juliette say anything to you?" Dani leaned forward toward the other woman. "I mean, anything other than chit chat?"

Ronnie put the book beside her and smiled. "She was drug addled so she rambled some. She has a bit of a crush on the boss, but she also has some daddy issues, so she's confused, but then she made more than one pass at me, so I think she's used to getting screwed when she's high." She shrugged. "Happens a lot though, especially if she gets her drugs for sex the signals get mixed and you associate it."

"You sound like you know from experience." Dani frowned.

"Doc, I know too much of a lot of shit from experience." She scratched at the patch on her arm suddenly wishing for a cigarette in the worst way. "I used the drugs as an escape most of the time, so yeah, I get it. I mean the army was good for me and got me out of most of it, but then some bad shit happened again and I almost ended up like Juliette. I would have if…" She shook her head and her eyes took on a faraway look. "It doesn't matter."

Dani didn't press, but she took the woman's hand. "If you ever need to talk about it, my door is open. I work for the entire Hawks organization. So, that includes security as well. There's no charge as I bill the Hawks directly and I can help with the smoking if you're interested."

Ronnie snorted, "You gonna hypnotize me or something?"

Dani nodded. "Actually, yes, but only if you want it."

"Really, that shit works?"

"Have you met Matt Donnally?"

"The head trainer?"

Nico's voice interrupted, "Ex-head trainer, now assistant GM and ex-smoker, but yes same man."

"Yea, I know him and he was a big chain smoker." She looked from Nico to Dani. "He quit?"

Nico now stood behind Dani. "Dr. Santino met him one night, slept with him, hypnotized him and he quit smoking that same night. I think he maybe smoked once since then."

Dani turned around and glared at him. "Nico…" She hissed. "Really did you have to include the entire story?"

Nico bent over the couch, his hands on Dani's shoulders and his mouth to her ear. "Did you have to tell Ronnie we were sleeping together?"

Ronnie giggled. "Ah, payback's a bitch boss. I suppose I have some coming too don't I?"

Nico stood and glared. "Oh, you should probably watch your back Clemente."

She held up her hands and picked up her book just as the door buzzed. She stood and ran to door. "Ah, saved by the taxi at the door." She pressed the button as she looked at the monitor; it was the doorman. "Yes?"

"There's a cab here for Mr. Careles."

"He'll be right down, thank you." She turned to Nico and Dani. "Your cab is here and like I promised the doc, no one outside these walls will know your secret."

Nico did smile then. "I know because I trust you Ronnie. If I didn't you wouldn't be here and you wouldn't work for me at all."

She nodded and inwardly she let out a sigh of relief.

Nico grabbed his coat and Dani's from the chair. He slid his on and helped her into hers. Then he picked up the overnight bag he'd packed and moved to the door. "I'll lock it from the outside and I'll even set the alarms. You have the nanny code I gave you, but like I said, the system alerts me when it's been disabled." He watched Ronnie nod. "You know where the cameras are and you have the temporary password for the WiFi. You know my number and Dani's number and you know what to do if anything else is to happen."

Ronnie nodded again. "Yes and I know CPR and the Heimlich and basic first aid. Hell, I can put in stitches and deliver a baby if you need me to boss." She rolled her eyes.

He flipped her off with a smile.

She flipped the bird right back, "Cocksucker." She winked at him, "Get the hell out of here before your cab leaves."

Dani gave the woman a hug, "Thanks and like I said, if you ever need to talk, let me know and I'll see you in the morning."

Ronnie hugged her back. "Okay, and thanks I might do that hypnotism thing this quitting smoking is killing me."

The ride down the elevator was quiet. Dani didn't say anything and Nico seemed interested in his phone. They exited through the lobby of his building, and onto the street.

Nico greeted the doorman by name and tipped him for calling the cab.

"Marriot Marquis," Nico said after they'd settled into the cab. It was only then that he looked to Dani. "You okay?"

She nodded. "Yes, you?"

He slid his arm behind her and moved closer. "I will be." He nuzzled her neck, his voice low. "Once I have you naked and under me."

She shivered and arched her neck to give him better access to skin. "Mmm…" She started to turn to face him so she could kiss him, but he stopped her.

"No, face forward." He angled his body a bit, bent his knee just a tad, but still faced forward mostly himself. The arm around her shoulder teased along her collarbone while his other inched up the inside of her thigh. "Is he watching?"

Dani looked and yes, the driver adjusted the mirror some and glanced into it at the red light to see what they were doing. "Yea…Nico…" Her voice was quiet as his hand slipped to the juncture between her legs and pressed.

"Shh," He slid his hand up under her sweater and cupped her breast through her bra to tease the nipple through it. He kissed her jawline as he did. "You like that he's watching, it's getting you hot."

She shook her head, but he was right.

He pinched her nipple until she gasped. "Don't lie to me Dani."

"Okay…fine…it's exciting, but I don't really like him watching."

He smiled against her ear. "Fair enough." He gently bit her earlobe, "But it's got you wet…"

She nodded, her eyes on the rearview mirror and then she looked away when the cabbie winked at her. She knew she was blushing. "Yes…"

Nico let his hand slide back down her body and then lower again to press between her legs.

She gasped and bit her tongue to keep from moaning.

"Mm, that's nice isn't it Dani?"

She looked over to him, her eyes catching his. "Nico." Her hand grabbed his to still his movements and she shook her head at him. "Please not here."

He chuckled and stopped. He titled her chin up and bent close to her. "I want to make you cum while he watches, but I won't." He kissed her instead knowing that there were plenty of other buttons he'd be pushing tonight.

When he pulled back Dani was breathless, flushed and almost wishing she hadn't asked him to stop because there was a deep ache between her legs, but the cab pulled to a stop. "Thank god…" She opened the door in a rush and stepped onto the curb. She headed toward the hotel, not waiting for Nico, just needing to get away from the cabbie and needing the air.

Nico caught up with her and grabbed her arm. "Whoa, where are you going?" He tucked her arm into his, adjusted the bag on his shoulder and then held the door for her. "You can't get very far without me."

"I just…I didn't like him watching me." She snuggled against Nico's shoulder as they waited for the elevator and then took it back up to the thirty-first floor.

He kissed her hair. "It made you hot Dani." They were the only people in the elevator at the time. "It's okay to admit it."

She pulled back and looked up at him reminded about what Gabrielle had told her earlier. She frowned. "Do you have a voyeuristic streak?"

He didn't like the suspicious look in her eyes and the odd quirk in her voice. "What's the matter Dani? I'm only teasing you."

She shook her head. "Nothing."

The elevator doors opened and they got out. Nico fished out the keycard and opened the door. "It's not 'nothing', the look on your face says something. So, let's deal with it now."

Dani took off her jacket and hung it in the closet by the door before she moved to the living room area. She sat on the couch and took off her heels. "Really, it's nothing."

Nico set the bag on the bed before he hung his coat and followed her lead with his shoes and socks. He took a few minutes to pull a bottle of white wine out from the cooler and open it. He poured two glasses and carried them to the living area before he sat down next to Danielle. He slid one in front of Dani and set one down in front of himself.

"Now, stop lying to me." He traced Dani's jaw with his finger. "You spent plenty of time with Gabby to hear about our history." He turned her face him. "Did she tell you how she made me watch?"

Dani felt her face heat up along with the speed of her pulse. She reached for the wine glass and took a long drink. She nodded. "Tell me she was lying."

"I can't, she's a bitch, but she was telling you the truth."

"And you watched?" Dani looked at him like he was nuts. "I mean she can set it up, but she can't make you keep watching." She set her glass down.

"I'm a man Danielle. I was weak willed and fuck it all. It was hot. They both knew I was watching and Marshall was as twisted as Gabby ever could be." He watched Dani's face and held up a hand. He knew what she was thinking. "Don't ask the next question Dani if you really don't want to hear the answer. "We were all much, much younger and I was a hell of a lot more stupid than I am now."

He gently took her chin when she tried to look away. "It doesn't change who I am today Dani." He brushed her lips with his own, drew her into the kiss as his fingers massaged the back of her skull. He pulled back. "I still want you and need you. You still want and need me. Nothing changed."

He was right of course and what difference did it make. His sexual past was in the past, did it matter? She wasn't sure why it should or did. "You're right" She reached for him, pulled him; her hands gripped his shirt first and then started to work on the buttons, but he stopped her.

He pulled back. "Hang on." He smiled at her and pushed her hair out of her face. "Finish your wine." He sat back and picked up his glass and took a sip, smiling when Dani groaned in frustration. "Trust me, Dani." He raised his eyebrow.

"You tell me that a lot Nico. I do trust you, but you frustrate the hell out of me." She took her glass and drank her wine, watching him as she did.

He sipped his wine and trailed his hand up the inside of her thigh with his free hand. "But do I ever disappoint you, Dani? Have I ever left you unsatisfied?" His voice was low and he had leaned close to whisper it in her ear.

"No." She shivered as his hand sent shivers up her spine and wet heat to her center. She tried to keep her hand steady, but it shook as she finished her wine.

He took her empty glass and set it on the table. "So, then don't complain and can you honestly tell me Dani…" He turned to face her again, his hands drifting under the hem of her sweater so his fingertips could skim the sensitive skin of her hips and belly. He watched her shiver, his eyes on hers. "You never closed your eyes, late at night and touched yourself as you fantasized about having two men in your bed?"

Dani inhaled sharply at his words and as his nimble fingers worked open her fly and made her toes curl into the carpet. "No…not really…" She barely recognized her own voice as thoughts suddenly flashed into her head. Thoughts she really didn't want, but god they were hot. Her eyes closed and she moaned because the men in her fantasy bed should not be there together, yet they were.

Nico smiled because he knew where his suggestion just sent her, "But you are now."

His hands moved up under her sweater and he pulled it over her head so he had more access to her skin. He kissed her then seducing her mouth with his own. His tongue stroking and darting, daring Dani's to follow. He pulled back and kissed down her neck, nipping with his teeth as his hands slid to her back to undo her bra. He wanted her naked and he wanted her naked now. He had the bra off and then he sat back so he could see her. He cupped her breast and brushed each nipple with his thumb, watching her eyes as he did.

"Now it's in your head Dani and you're stuck with it, so don't judge me." He moved then, lifted her by her hips and sat her on his lap so she was facing away from him. Her head rested on his shoulder so his mouth was by her ear, he continued to play with her nipples. He rolled and pulled them. "I told you I wanted control Dani." He separated his thighs and pulled her legs further open. "Now, I'm in your head…" he chuckled, "Well, me and someone else…" He purposely tweaked her nipples sharply.

Dani's breath caught and she tensed at the sudden pinch. Then Nico's right hand sank into the waist of her panties and found her clit and she moaned and arched into the pleasure of it. "Yes…" She pressed her head further into his shoulder and a kiss into his neck as her hands wound up to his head to try to pull him into a kiss.

He smiled and let her. He kissed her, not letting her control it at all, keeping constant control and pulling back when he felt her get frustrated with him. He smiled and sank his finger inside her wet heat to prove he still had the upper hand. She whimpered and lost her focus. "I'm still in charge Danielle." He thrust his finger a few times and then pulled out to play over her clit again. He pulled at her nipple again, and this time smiled when she gasped in pleasure not in pain. "You're learning." He kissed her neck and continued to work her up, but not let her cum.

Dani squirmed on Nico's lap in frustration. "Nico, please," she wanted to touch him, to see him. She could feel the thick evidence of his need pressed against her ass, but with the exception of his hands on her breasts, his voice in her ear and his fingers on her clit and fingering her that was it. "I need more."

He stilled his hands completely and tilted her head so he could see her eyes. "Tell me Dani. Tell me what is it you need."

She glared at him. "You. More, I want you to touch me. I want to touch you. Fuck me." She was panting, she was begging. She tried to get up from his lap, but he had his arm wrapped around her. She was still in her pants and he was still fully clothed. "Dammit, you still have all your clothes on."

He raised a single eyebrow. "Are you sure?"

She struggled again and this time he released her. She stood and turned around. She smiled and in agitation she pulled her pants down her hips and threw them across the room, then she straddled him and started to unbutton his shirt. "Yes, you stubborn, idiotic, man I want you. I want you to fuck me." She had his shirt unbuttoned and then worked on his belt while he undid his cuffs. She undid his fly and then stood back up. "Now, get the damn clothes off." She put her hands on her hips and glared down at him.

He sat there and reached for his unfinished wine in a completely unhurried manor. He watched her and sipped it. He wanted her and oh he intended to have her, but he needed a few seconds to collect himself. She was pushing his buttons right now and she didn't know it. He glanced up at her and tried not to think of Gabrielle, because this was not Gabrielle. He finished his wine and put the glass down.

"Dani come here." He stood gathered Dani against him, pressing himself against her belly with a groan. "God, you feel so good." He gathered her hair in his hand and used it to pull her head back so he could see her face. "Please don't order me like that, please…" He pressed his face into the curve of her neck and inhaled her sweet scent. "You don't smell like her, thank god, no Chanel #5. Just you, something like caramel apples and spice," he pulled back and gave her a funny look, "maybe cannoli?"

She frowned and shook her head when she realized what he was talking about. "I'm sorry Nico I didn't mean to…" she pressed kisses to his face and lips. Shit, she never meant to ever make him think about that bitch in that way. "Never, ever would I do that…"

He put a finger to her lips. "Dani, stop I know it's okay." He kissed her instead and kept his hand in her hair. "It doesn't change what I need." He pressed his hips against her belly, "Or what I want." He gave her a dangerous smile. "Maybe makes me want it more."

Dani shivered. "Oh shit…" She gripped his shoulders under his shirt, her nails digging into his skin and she moaned when he nipped at her earlobe. "Nico…"

He growled near her ear. "You want me inside you Dani?" He spun her around and pressed her from behind again. "Behind you like this, while you beg for more?"

"Oh my god Nico…please…" Her knees were weak. She gripped his forearms and looked over her shoulder. "Yes."

He let her go and she stumbled a bit. He smiled, it wasn't cruel. "Get on the bed on your knees for me Dani." He watched her move to the bed and she hesitantly climbed onto the bed and onto her knees. He watched as she turned to watch him and he smiled. He pulled off his shirt, not caring where he dropped it. He took the belt off, but didn't drop it to the floor. Then his pants fell to the floor and he stepped free of them. He stalked to the bed, his eyes on Dani the entire time.

"Turn around and face the bottom of the bed Dani."

When Dani did she realized that there was a large mirror on the wall above the dresser there that gave a full view from the bed. She watched herself flush as Nico turned the lights up over the bed. "Oh."

"You're beautiful." Nico got into the bed with Dani and knelt behind her. He pulled her against his chest. One of his arms held her tight against him and he used the other to explore her freely while they watched in the mirror. "Keep your eyes open Dani." His voice was thick with desire and need. "You're so responsive, so damn sexy…" His voice trailed off in a soft moan and he pressed his cock into her ass when his fingers found her pussy wet and ready. "I need you so much right now."

"Me too." Her voice was barely a whisper as she watched almost mesmerized in the mirror. "You make me want things Nico…" she caught his eyes in the mirror and she shivered by the intensity in his green gaze. "Things I shouldn't want."

He turned her face to his to kiss her. It was passionate, hard and quick. He pulled back. "There's no such thing as something you shouldn't want Dani." He smiled and shifted behind her and gathered her hands in one of his like he had before. Then he held up his belt and felt a shiver run through Dani's entire body. "Mm," he let the leather tip slide down her back, "afraid?"

She saw him in the mirror and shook her head. "Not of you." She swallowed, she wasn't, but there was a dark excitement to it. "But, I don't know what to expect."

He pressed a kiss between her shoulder blades and then a bit lower down her back. "Nothing much, I'm just going to use this to restrain you."

Dani's eyes went wide. "Nico…" she shook her head. She'd let Ray tie her hands once, once and that was all and she hadn't liked it at all. "I don't…"

Nico kissed her softly. "Dani, trust me." He didn't ask, he simple stated it as he slipped a loop of leather over her hands and then up to her elbows. He wound the rest around down toward her wrists until her arms were bound together from elbows to wrists.

She tugged when he finished, but it was pretty secure. She looked over her shoulder at him. "Nico…" there was a touch of mild panic in her voice.

Then he pulled her back against his chest, it was more awkward with her hands in the way, but he'd done this before. He pressed his mouth to her ear again. "Dani, if it's too much you tell me quarterback, okay. It's your safe word. You understand me?"

She nodded.

"What's your safe word Dani?"

She swallowed, unable to believe she was even having a conversation involving safe words. "Quarterback."

"Good." He reached around and cupped both her breasts to tease them and when she moaned thick in her throat he did too. "God, I love that sound baby." He smiled. "You remember what you told me earlier in my office?" He rubbed his cheek against hers, "about what might feel nice against your thigh?"

Dani shivered and nodded, her eyes were wide and her pupils were so wide her eyes looked almost black.

"You want my mouth on you again Dani?" Nico was kissing down her shoulder moving around her as he asked.

"Yes, please, yes…"

He smiled and helped her lay back. Her hands put her hips at an upward angle perfect for oral sex, of course he knew that. "If your hands get numb let me know." He traced a path with his fingers lightly over her hips as he settled between her legs and spread her open. He licked her long and slow first, warming her up and enjoyed her hitched breathing and then went to work on her clit and used his fingers to thrust inside to work her up quickly. The angle of her hips had helped and soon she was panting his name.

Dani arched her back and pressed her heels into the mattress as she came. "Shit…fuck…" Her legs were shaking and Nico was still stroking her, more slowly as he let her come down from the orgasm. She lifted her head and watched him smile up at her. "You're so smug sometimes…" She smiled at him and wiggled her fingers. "Can I…"

He nodded and helped her up. He massaged her shoulders and checked the bonds, but didn't loosen them. Then he kissed her. "I really need you Dani."

She smiled, "You think I don't still need you?" She cocked her head to the side and got to her knees facing him. "I can't get the thought of you behind me out of my head."

"Good." Then he was behind her and his hand was tangled in her hair. His cock was pressed against her ass and he pressed her forward into the mattress. "I want you hard and fast Dani." He cursed, "Fuck, hang on." He got off the bed and found his bag which they'd knocked to the floor. He yanked his shaving kit from the top of the bag and found what he needed. He was back on the bed and sliding the condom on a few seconds later. He nuzzled Dani's neck and kissed her when she turned to him. "Sorry."

She smiled, "Don't apologize." She wiggled toward him and bent forward. "Just fuck me, please."

Nico lined himself up and slid inside Dani's hot willing body slowly. He pressed her face down into the mattress, but gathered her hair for control. This was his fantasy. Her arms were restrained with his leather belt along her back and he roared and he pulled back and thrust back into her slick, hot heat.

He threw his head back and gave up trying to control the rising need pounding in his head and veins. His left hand grabbed Dani's hands and he pulled her against him as he slammed into her. He heard her grunt when slammed into her, but he didn't stop as he pulled out and thrust back in even harder. "Yes, baby…so fucking good."

Dani couldn't explain how she felt, so she didn't try to. Her body was on fire, stretched wide and burning with pain and passion at the same time. Her shoulders were searing, each of Nico's thrusts pushed her closer to her orgasm, and sent a sliver of odd pain through her that actually seemed to make the pleasure even sweeter when he pulled out. "Oh god, oh god…oh, god…" She chanted it like a lifeline as he thrust in and out. She was lost somewhere between pleasure and pain-the hand in her hair that yanked and arched her back and her bound arms- she didn't know what was happening, but she wanted whatever it was so badly.

Nico knew exactly what was happening and he pushed further, watching Dani's face in the mirror and reading her body for the clues. He hoped he could hold out, because as the sweat beaded on his forehead and his balls pulled up tight he knew he was close. His body was so tense. He thrust hard and shifted his hips. He let his hand leave her hair and drift lower. He stroked her clit in time to his rough, staccato thrusts, "God. Ba..by…please…" He stroked her and then…

Dani screamed when he touched her and everything suddenly exploded for her. She sobbed into the comforter as the pressure between her legs suddenly bloomed into pleasure that spread from her center, head to toe. She felt her whole body pulse and throb, first around Nico's cock and then even her fingertips. Her vision even blinked a few times and she struggled to breathe as Nico caught up with her.

He grabbed both her hips now and pumped into her hard as he could and it didn't take long before he came with a strangled gasp and collapsed over top of her. He didn't move for some time, trying to catch his breath. He heard Dani say something, but couldn't make it out. He lifted his head from her lower back. "What baby?"

She raised her face from the mattress and looked over her shoulder. "Quarterback. I said quarterback. You're crushing me and I cry foul." She gave him a silly smile. "And my hands are numb." She wiggled her fingers.

Nico sat up and started undoing the belt. "Sorry." He rubbed the circulation back into her arms as he unwound it. Then he dropped the belt to the floor. He got up, took care of the condom and came back to bed with two glasses of wine. He set them on the table and then rechecked on her arms. "You okay?"

She wiggled her fingers with a smile and sat up against the pillows as she pulled the sheet up over her chest and snuggled up against his side. "Mm-hmm, very good, I'm not sure how you make it better each time, but you probably should stop that or eventually you'll start disappointing me." She winked at him and took the wine glass he handed to her.

He chuckled. "Well, since I could tell you the same thing, maybe you start worrying too." He kissed her temple. They were both damp with sweat, but he didn't care. He felt much more relaxed than he had for some time. "That was what I needed, Dani. Thank you."

She shifted to see him. "It wasn't bad Nico." She ducked her head. "I liked it."

He lifted her chin so he could see her eyes. "Did I hurt you Dani?"

She shrugged. "Not bad enough for me not to want more."

"You'll have bruises tomorrow and you'll be really sore." He frowned. "I mean like you were ridden hard Dani, you might want a few days before we see each other again."

"Well I'm getting used to seeing you every day." She took a drink and then handed him her glass. When he'd set it down she snuggled up to him. "And I'm enjoying the sex way more than I should."

He laughed. "Is it wrong to enjoy sex now?"

She sighed. "No, I'm just afraid it'll confuse things for me." She shook her head. "You confuse the hell out of me." She rested her head on his chest and traced circles through his chest hair.

It was quiet for a several long minutes, both of them just enjoying the afterglow of sex. Dani's head rested on Nico's chest and Nico's arm was around her as he absently played with her hair or traced lines over her shoulders.

Then Dani remembered the kids. "Tyler was asking Ray Jay about his plants. He doesn't know they don't exist and I'm worried he'll come looking for them. Ray Jay blew him off."

"I have someone watching the house Dani."

She sat up and looked at him. The sheet dropped and when she noticed Nico's eyes travel to her breasts she picked the sheet back up. "Hey, pay attention."

"I can't help it. Male DNA demands breasts get immediate attention, it's hardwired." He held up his hands. "And before you get upset, I was worried so I have Tommy watching the house at night and Vic during the day and I didn't tell you because you freak out. I also have a tail on both the boys, so I know where they are all the time too. So, the kids are safe tonight. Tommy's good Danielle." He traced the top of the sheet and tugged at it when his finger reached the spot between her breasts. "So, now that you know I'm on top of it…drop the sheet and let me be distracted."

She rolled her eyes, but she let go of the sheet and leaned in to kiss him. "Only because you really aren't distracted, are you?"

He smiled and shook his head. "No, not really, only when I can afford to be." He rolled Dani under him and kissed her senseless because right now it was just the two of them and he knew in the morning reality would be back to bite them both in the ass.


	11. Reality Bites

**_NOTE:_**Okay, so posting this now and probably the next chapter early tomorrow. I had a crap week, just personally, so it was tough for me to get these chapters done and this was really written as one long chapter I pulled it into two, just the first one is shorter. I'm finishing the edit on the second half, but The Walking Dead premier is on right now :D and then I have to watch Dexter, so it's slow and again if there are mistakes...I'm sorry!

Thanks for the reads, reviews, follows and favorites!

* * *

**Reality Bites**

Dani wasn't sure what woke her, but her eyes opened suddenly. She stared at the ceiling and blinked. She was on her back and the room was already unfamiliar and there was warmth beside her. At first her sleepy mind thought Matt and then she remembered. She rolled to her side and pulled the comforter up higher as she snuggled her back close.

Nico rolled to his side and spooned against her, settling his chin to her shoulder and his arm around her waist. "Sorry if I woke you."

"What time is it?" She yawned and smiled when he kissed her ear.

"Almost six."

"Then it's about time to get up anyway." She stretched and groaned when her shoulders protested. "I hope the shower pressure is good." She reached and rubbed her right shoulder. "I'm stiff."

Nico grabbed her hips and pulled her back against his cock. "Seems I have a similar problem. Maybe you could help me out?"

She chuckled and rolled over. She palmed his erection and stroked him. "Oh I don't know, I think I remember you warning me about taking a break last night."

He rolled and pinned her underneath him. He proceeded to kiss her senseless and then kiss down her neck to her breasts. He spent time on them until she was begging him to take her. He pulled back and watched her face. "Are you sure Dani?" He kissed her swollen lips and stroked her swollen clit. "Do you need a break, now?"

"I'm going to kill you." She grabbed the shaving kit that she'd rescued from the floor the night before off the bedside table and threw it at him. "Find the damn condom."

He laughed as he did and fifteen minutes later they were sweating and panting on the sheets.

She rolled her head to the side. "Now I need a shower, then coffee."

He looked at her and pushed her damp hair out of her eyes. "I like you this way."

"What? Sweaty and naked?"

"Well, that's a bonus, but laid back and loose, when you don't worry about anything." He sat up. "I wish I could keep you this way." He wiped his face. "I wish I could stay this way with you." He shook his head. "We have things we need to do. "Come on let's shower so we can get Juliette some help and then face the rest of the bullshit we need to deal with."

Dani let him help her up and then wrapped her arms around him. "I'm here for you Nico."

He hugged her. "I know Danielle. I know." He slapped her ass playfully and when she jumped he followed her into the bathroom. She didn't see him frown.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Nico had breakfast sent up. How he'd managed to find clothes for her, Danielle still had no idea, but there were three pairs of pants, two blouses and a sweater for her to choose from when she got out of the shower.

Dani traveled with enough makeup to do her face in a respectable way, so that wasn't an issue. Nico had packed her an extra toothbrush and some hair product that he obviously had left over from previous female house guests, or that he borrowed from Juliette, she didn't ask. So, when she finished dressing, there was no way for anyone who had seen her the previous day to know she'd spent the night away from her home. She looked in the mirror and smiled. The taupe slacks paired with the green fitted, asymmetric, wrap sweater that was belted at the waist was something she would have chosen for herself. She slid her heels on as she finished her coffee.

"How did you manage the clothes?" She glanced up when Nico came out of the bathroom tucking his shaving kit into his bag.

He smiled. "Last time we were here I told the concierge your size and had her ready some seasonal outfits just in case." He zipped his bag and walked over to her. "They sent me over some pictures and I agreed to them. Just leave what you don't want, but if you want something else take it." He pulled her against him and kissed her. "And you can pay me if you feel you need to, that's fine. I just figured we might find ourselves in a situation like this, I'm like a Boy Scout always prepared…"

"How much is this?" Dani didn't see any tags so she had no idea.

Nico pulled back and looked at her. He knew the cashmere sweater and silk and cashmere pants were about fifteen hundred and he knew if he told her she'd flip out. "I'm not sure, but I can find out, but I'd rather you just accept them as a gift."

She looked down at the clothes. She knew the designers and she knew they'd be expensive. "Nico, I know I probably can't afford this and that reminds me, what do I owe you for getting Ray Jay's car out of impound?" She stood there and tried to decide if she should just suck it up and do the walk of shame in her own clothes or figure out a way to run home and change somehow.

Nico pulled Dani into his arms. "Dani, you don't owe me anything. First, I can and will bill the impound cost to the Hawks as a miscellaneous expense. They question nothing. Second, consider the clothes a gift, please. I picked it out. I wanted to see you in this outfit; I liked it and hoped you would too. I don't want or need your money." He kissed her. "Please, just accept them. You look sexy and in charge in this outfit. You'll give Gabrielle-fucking-Pittman a run for her money."

Dani didn't know what to say. It was too much, really it was. She could accept the impound since he was being paid back, but the cost of the clothes was beyond anything she could accept as a gift. She looped her arms behind his neck and pulled back. "Nico," she wished she didn't have tears in her eyes. "Shit, I don't know what you're doing to me."

He shook his head and frowned as he wiped her eyes. "You just did your make up Dani." He kissed her nose. "It's a gift Dani, accept it. Stop analyzing it and take it."

"Nico, if you add up our dates, there has been one breakfast with my son, and dinner in bed after we had sex. Basically, we've had sex. That's it; a relationship based on sex and now you've bought me a ridiculously expensive gift…I don't know how to feel."

He shook his head and smiled at her. "Stop thinking that our relationship started this week Dani." He stepped back and straightened the belt of her sweater, which didn't really need straightened. "How many times have I called you for advice at odd hours, or stopped by your house?" His eyebrow rose. "How many times did I bring you coffee at the office or have an excuse to sit beside you at the practice field or slip into your car?"

She stared at him, her mouth open until he reached out and pushed her bottom jaw closed. "Oh my god you did all that on purpose?"

He smiled and shrugged, "About half of it could have waited until morning, or been handled over the phone. If I showed up it could have been done from across the room." He cupped her cheek. "I made excuses to be near you Danielle, more excuses to touch you or keep you near me. I wanted a relationship, even if I was just building a friendship."

She smiled at him. "So…"

"So, take the clothes Dani because I want you to have them as a friend." He took her hand and kissed her palm while he watched her face. "And now, I want you to have them as my lover."

She nodded. "O….Okay, but the others go back then."

"Fair enough." He kissed her then with a languid passionate burn that really made him want to make long, slow love to her and to take their clothes back off. He pulled back at the ringing from across the room. "Dani…hey,"

She stared up at him dazed.

"Your phone's ringing sweetheart." He smiled at her. "You might want to get it."

She shook her head. "Shit…I told Linds to call in the morning…shit…" She scrambled for her phone, which was charging on the dresser. She unplugged it and hit accept. "Linds?"

"Mom, we're heading to school, said we'd call. You alright? You sound off."

She made a nervous sound. "No, I mean yea…I'm fine, just rushed to get my phone. I ah, you guys okay?"

"Yea, mom we just left the house, we're fine." There was noise. "Ray Jay says Tyler's called four times."

Dani looked at Nico, her eyes wide. "Tyler called four times?"

"That's what he said mom."

Nico looked at her, "I want to talk to Ray Jay."

"Can you put Ray Jay on the Bluetooth Lindsay?"

"Why?"

"Nico's here with me because the client is team related and he wants to talk to Ray Jay."

"Oh, um, okay…hang on."

Nico put the phone on speaker so Dani could hear and they waited.

A few more seconds passed and then Ray Jay's voice, "Hey, Nico."

"Ray Jay, did you talk to Tyler?"

"Dude, he's getting to be a total asshole. He woke me up like three times last night. I didn't answer the fourth time, turned my phone off, ya know?"

"Okay, so the other three times, did you talk to him or not?"

Ray Jay sighed. "Yeah, is mom there? I don't want her hearing shit."

Nico rolled his eyes and glanced at Dani, "She's not hearing this if that's what you mean."

"Cool, anyway…I told him I dumped the plants and got arrested even and he told me I owed him money and I told him to fuck off I didn't owe him jack shit. He said if I didn't pay, he was going to fuck me up and I told him if he tried it I'd knock his ass out like last time."

Nico looked at Dani, "You knocked him out?"

Ray Jay laughed. "Hell yeah, he said something about Linds, so I did."

Nico shook his head. "Okay, so what then?"

"I hung up on him, but the dick called back twice. The last time he told me if I didn't pay him he was going to hurt Lindsay." Ray Jay whispered the last part.

Nico looked at Dani, she was pale and looked sick. She had sat down. "Ray Jay listen to me. I want you to skip school. I'm texting you an address. You go there and nowhere else and when you get there, you stay there. Do you understand me?"

Ray Jay didn't answer for a beat. "Nico, what's going on?"

"What did I just tell you Ray Jay?"

"You told me to go where you text me to and to skip school, but I mean Tyler's just an asshole kid right?"

Nico rubbed his neck. "He is, but it's his brother I'm worried about and if he's threatened your sister, it's a big deal."

"Okay, so where am I going then?"

"I'll text it, don't tell anyone. Do you understand? No one else knows where you are."

"Nico?"

"Ray Jay, I'm sending you the address."

"Shit, what the…I hate traffic…okay text me the address. Nico you still there?"

Ray Jay?"

"Nico can you hear me, which way am I heading to the city or not?"

"Ray Jay head to the city."

"Nico, city or not?"

"City, Ray Jay…"

The line went dead.

Nico sent a text with the address to both Lindsay and to Ray Jay. He had Dani do the same. He dialed again and it went right to voicemail. Obviously, they were in a dead zone somewhere because Lindsay's phone did the exact thing.

Nico watched Dani swallow nervously and he tried to calm her, by taking her hand and telling her, "The texts usually go through."

She nodded. "I know."

"They aren't going to school. They did hear me tell them that and I still have eyes on both the boys. He shot texts to Ben and AJ to be sure and then got in contact with Vic to pull him from the house and send him after the kids. Dani knew their usual route to school, so he sent him that way. He wanted eyes on Ray Jay's car as soon as he could get them. He paced across the room and spoke quietly and quickly. Tommy was already driving that direction and when he hung up with Vic he called Tommy.

He glanced at Dani, who was dialing the phone again. He saw her smile.

"Thank god Lindsay." She looked to the man across the room. "Nico, she answered."

He smiled and spoke with Tommy and then looked to Dani. "Where are they?"

After several minutes on the phone, it was arranged for them to meet up with Tommy, wait for Vic and then Vic would escort them to the city.

Nico slipped his phone to his pocked and watched Dani as she sat on the couch in the living area of the suite. She was idly stirring a spoon around a cup of cold coffee as she stared and she was tapping her foot. He crouched down beside her before she realized he was there. "Hey, you alright?"

She looked over at him and shook her head. "Not really, no. I don't like this Nico. I'm not used to this."

Nico stilled the hand playing with the spoon. "I know Dani, but I am and right now I have things under control."

She gripped his hand and took a deep breath. "I'm glad you were there when Ray Jay called. I'm glad Ray didn't answer the phone because this could be much worse if you weren't there…here." She looked up at him. "I can't do this without you right now Nico, I'm scared for Ray Jay and Lindsay…if anything happens to them…" She didn't continue, she couldn't. When Ray Jay had whispered that Tyler had threatened Lindsay, Dani had heard how scared he sounded. She knew he was scared and that terrified her.

Nico moved and sat beside Dani on the sofa and then pulled her against him. "Danielle, you don't have to do any of this alone." He kissed to top of her head and let her grip his jacket. She wasn't crying, she was desperate and beyond tears at this point. He pulled back and looked into her eyes. "I promise you I won't let anything happen to your kids."

She nodded, she knew, but she was overwhelmed and needed space. She snorted, "Yea, I know because you need me in top condition for the Hawks." She smirked at him.

He frowned, a bit angry, a bit hurt. "No Danielle, because you love your kids and I care about you. If you didn't work for the Hawks I'd still do everything within my power to keep your children safe. Right now, leave the Hawks I don't give a fuck, my skills are still at your disposal."

She pulled back. "I didn't mean it that way Nico." She touched his face. She really hadn't meant to hurt him. "I'm just overwhelmed. I'm sorry."

He stood. "It's okay Dani. I understand and we do need to go. Why don't you fix your makeup and I'll call down and have a cab ready?"

Nico watched her move into the bathroom and he sighed. He understood what she did, but he didn't like it. Last night he thought he'd torn a wall down, found a chink in the wall she had around her, but she was still reinforcing it. He couldn't blame her. Hell, he wasn't sure why he was even willing to risk his own heart, but then, he'd been single so long. He stopped his thoughts, he didn't want to go there.

He called the desk and asked for a cab, then he called Ronnie.

She answered three rings in.

"Yo, boss."

"How was your night?"

"A little rocky emotionally, but we did fine. Your girl is…well, she's fucked up."

Nico chuckled and wiped unexpected tears from his eyes. "Yea, I know. She say or do anything I need to know about?"

"Hang on, lemme…"

Nico heard her moving, then she was back.

"Had to get out of the bed, she didn't want to sleep alone and no, not like that, we were fully clothed, so get that fantasy out of your head you dirty old man."

Nico smiled and cringed inwardly at the same time.

"Let's see, well seems Mrs. P's a bigger bitch than I figured and if that upsets you, I'm sorry boss since according to Jules here, you and the Mrs. P were bumping nasty bits in the past…"

"She's a bigger bitch than you'll ever know Ronnie, trust me."

"Good, but from what I heard that's not possible, but whatever and if your cock hasn't rotted off yet you should consider yourself lucky because the woman sounds like her cunt is probably filled with acid like the rest of her. That's probably none of my business."

Nico sighed and tried not to smile. Working with a woman was different than working with a man. "Not really, back to the question Ronnie."

"Yea, yea…got a name of a dealer, he was the first guy to ever hook her up with H and teach her how to shoot up and you really don't want to know the other shit she shared with me about him." She swallowed, she wasn't telling Nico that shit. "Thing is boss, you already have his file."

"You have to be kidding me."

"Nope, none other than Mason Harper and please nail his ass because he's a piece of shit that needs eliminated. There's some things you might want to keep away from the cops though, he has some video stuff he likes to keep. Jules is on some of them…it sounds, um rough boss."

Nico went black with rage for a few seconds. He took a breath.

"Jules is okay boss, we talked. She's gonna make it. I mean she has a lot to work through, but…I think she'll be okay."

"Jules…I mean Juliette will be okay, I know Dr. Santino will work with her. She's strong." He was talking more for himself and he knew it. He saw Dani come out of the bathroom and almost lost it. "I'm going to give the phone to Dr. Santino for a minute okay?"

He needed a minute to collect himself. He handed Dani the phone and then left the room. He strode down the hall to the small lobby overlooking the city. He stared at the skyline and gripped the windowsill. He always suspected what he now knew, but now he had someone to focus the violence on.

Someone had violated Juliette in ways he couldn't imagine, or could imagine and that was the problem, and that same someone had threatened the daughter of the woman he lo…cared a great deal for. He shook his head and then wiped a hand over his face. He was in so far over his head right now emotionally he wasn't sure where he stood. He was struggling with something he hadn't dealt with in a long time; the desire to kill another person. This wasn't the desire to protect that he usually channeled his darker desires into, but the outright need to destroy a life. He closed his eyes and fought the rush of power that coursed through his body at the thought. There used to be a time he savored that rush and it could be like a drug; holding life in death in your hands. His hands started shaking at the thought and memories flashed by quickly like mini movies.

He heard something behind him and turned, grabbed the wrist attached to the hand that was about to touch him, and luckily realized it was Dani before he twisted and had her on the floor followed by his forearm to her throat. He dropped her arm. "Sorry, I'm a bit distracted."

She smirked and rubbed her arm. "It's okay. I'll remember not to sneak up on you next time." She handed Nico his bag and his phone. "I figured you were ready to go?"

He nodded and took his things. "Our cab is here I'm sure, if not I'll just hail one in the street, or we'll take the subway." He put his phone in his inside pocket and checked his wallet and money clip per his habit before he left. "Did Ronnie update you?"

Dani reached up and cupped Nico's cheek. "Stop and look at me."

He paused and looked at her, though he didn't want to. He put his hand over hers. "Dani…I," his eyes were so lost when they found hers. "I want to kill him."

Dani was shocked at how cold he sounded. "But you won't Nico. You won't."

"You don't understand." He looked away and pulled her hand from her face, but didn't let go. He needed her touch to remain grounded. "Even if I don't kill him, I want him dead Dani. I should just want justice, not want him dead."

Dani shook her head. "If he'd done that to Lindsay, if he touches Lindsay…" She took a shaky breath. "Nico, if anything at all happens to Lindsay, or Ray Jay, I will kill him myself. It's what parents do. We protect our children. If you feel even half of what I feel for my kids for Juliette, then wanting to kill Mason is exactly how you should feel."

Nico almost smiled. "So, you're telling me I'm not a fucked up monster?"

She shook her head. "No, you're a normal parental type monster." She hugged him. "It's still illegal to kill him, but it's normal to want him dead."

He still felt horrible inside, but Dani's words helped center him again. He hugged her back and kissed the top of her head. "Let's go. We need to get Juliette in to the methadone clinic and we need to figure out what to do about Tyler and especially Mason."

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

It was just after noon when they left Dr. Harlan's office. After a complete history and exam and under Dani's watchful eye, he had agreed to starting Juliette on outpatient methadone therapy, only that meant keeping her methadone under lock and key. She'd already had a dose, but was still antsy as the medication took longer to kick in obviously than shooting up. Dani glanced into the rearview mirror.

"You doing okay?"

Juliette nodded. "I'm getting there. I've done this before, I'll be okay." She glanced down at her phone and looked back out the window. "He give me clonidine too?"

Dani smiled and held up the smaller prescription bottle. "Yes, for when we start cutting your dose in two days."

Juliette frowned, she already didn't think her dose was high enough, but she could deal. "These east coast docs aren't as liberal as the LA docs with their doses."

Nico grunted. "Yea, well maybe that's because the doctor Dani took you to actually wants to help get you off this shit."

"So, what are you doing with me now? Dragging me to work with you?"

He snickered. "You wish." He signaled and made the turn when it was clear. "You're going back to my place, spending more time with Ronnie, who is now your official New York bodyguard."

"You mean babysitter."

"If you insist." He turned on to Bleeker. "I ordered you lunch, it should be there by the time we get you home." He glanced into the mirror.

She frowned at him. "Pizza? Thai? What?"

He tried not to smile. "Oh, nothing special, chicken empanadas habaneras, tostones rellenos and paella."

She was suddenly sitting up gripping the seat back behind him. "From that Cuban place?"

He smiled now. "Yes, _that_ Cuban place."

She looked at Dani, "Oh you have to try the food there, it's soooo good. Oh, it's like a huge orgasm in your mouth, like sex and drugs and chocolate all at the same time."

Nico groaned. "Can you please not talk like that around me?"

Dani giggled and shook her head and turned to look at her. "I understand I think, except the drugs, that I don't get, but the rest I do."

"The paella…oh my god, I can't explain how good it is and Nico can make a kick ass paella, but this is sooo good."

Dani glanced at Nico with a raised eyebrow, "You cook?"

"Well, I have to eat." He shifted uncomfortably in his seat as she focused her attention on him again. "It's either that or restaurants and while I do spend an inordinate amount of time in them, I enjoy creating my own food and all that restaurant food gave me a picky palate, so to live up to my own expectations, I had to learn to cook."

Dani tucked that new tidbit away with a smile as they pulled into the parking garage.

Nico's phone rang at the elevator and he answered it, sending Juliette and Dani up to his loft ahead of him.

"What is it AJ?"

"Just letting you know that there's a bunch of movement at the summer house here in the Hamptons. Mason's up to something. He's had a few visitors overnight and some of them are heavy hitters."

"Anyone we need to worry about?"

"Well, I hit up my contacts with the DEA and he says we're risking stepping on some governmental toes just being here boss. This stupid kid probably doesn't even realize how deep a shit hole he's in."

Nico's hand fisted at his side. "I don't really care how deep a hole he's in. I just don't want him hurting anyone. He's made threats to people I care about. If he's gearing up to follow through, I can't let that happen just so they can round up whatever other piece of shit sits higher up the ladder." He knew how government agencies were, damn bureaucratic nightmares.

"From what I can tell, and I'm picking up only a few random phone calls since I had to be more careful when more heat showed up, but if they keep talking about the score they're planning on making, I don't think this kid's going to be much of a problem for much longer. He seems to think he's a fucking super villain or something. He's gonna help the big man make a huge buy of meth making supplies and heroin and then his boss is gonna help him and his brother with some payback. I think that's where Dr. Dani's kid comes in."

"Sounds like it." Nico checked his watch. "They have a time table?"

"Only thing I have is tonight on the when for all the shit, but like I said, the DEA is pretty sure that if the deal goes down with the drug shit, they'll round everyone up. Your guy on this end should go with them. Now, the younger kid will still be a wildcard, but the older one, he'll be off the grid."

Which helped since Mason was a big part of the problem, but Nico needed to get the video evidence out of the way too. "AJ, there's some video I need to get my hands on."

"What kind? We talking physical tapes or digital?"

"Digital, sexual in nature and I have very little idea where it might be stored, but he has a collection of various girls. Some might not be of age and most of it sounds like it might be violent in nature. There's a certain girl in particular I'm looking for. I want her video off the table, the rest can be used to prosecute this asshole."

AJ made a sound of disgust and Nico knew he was thinking of his own three nearly grown daughters. "I'll kill him myself."

"Just find the one with Miss Pittman, eliminate it from the collection and then be sure the others are found." Nico swallowed because he didn't want to say what he said next, "Especially, if there are any under aged girls." He wiped his face.

"Shit, shit, shit…"AJ cleared his throat. "I'm not going through all of that shit, but if I see any I will, but I know what you mean. I'll hack his system from here. I haven't done it yet because I didn't want to raise suspicion, but…shit."

"Keep me posted AJ and stay safe."

"I will. Be careful on your end too, Nico."

By the time Nico made it to his apartment the girls were eating. He'd ordered enough for at least six people according to Dani's estimation anyway. She was laughing at Ronnie as she fought Onyx over a shrimp.

Nico shook his head and picked up the cat and the shrimp and put them both on the floor. "You know better than to be on the table. Take your prize and go."

Juliette put another bite in her mouth, "I told her to just let him have it, but she said she wasn't giving up her food to some piece of alley trash that easily."

Nico snorted and slipped off his jacket. "He is not alley trash. He tried to be, but he is now reformed alley trash." He motioned to the cat as he was cleaning his paws. "See, he's civilized now."

Ronnie rolled her eyes. "Uh-huh, and he licks his ass with that tongue you know."

Dani snorted and finished her empanada. "This is really good." She took a drink. "Who was on the phone?" She asked setting down her glass.

He picked up one of the stuffed plantains and ate it in two bites only answering when he'd finished. "It was AJ, just checking in. Mason's still in the Hamptons."

Dani sighed in relief. "Good." She picked her fork back up and dug into some of the paella.

Nico watched Juliette. She was looking better, there was some color in her cheeks now. He leaned closer to her. "You doing alright?"

She hugged his arm and pressed her cheek to his bicep. "I miss dad Nico. I miss him a lot, there's a hole in my soul that's just gaping open." She looked up at him from against his arm, like a sad dog against its owner's leg. "You know how he called me every day at twelve o six, no matter what and let the phone ring six times? Today, I waited for the ring. Then it didn't and I was like, oh yea…dumb ass he's dead." Her eyes were dry, but her voice cracked. "For some reason today was the first day I waited for it…today was the first day I really missed it and him…" She shrugged and for the first time realized that everyone at the table was quiet and listening to her. She pulled away from Nico and looked at them. "Sorry." She wiped her now damp eyes and smiled sadly.

Nico swallowed and pulled her into his arms. "It's okay to be sad Juliette, it's okay to miss him."

Dani watched them and tried not to cry herself. She wondered about the phone call, but didn't ask. She looked to Ronnie and saw the other woman look away and wipe her own face. Then Ronnie got up and headed to the bedroom area, leaving the three of them alone.

Dani reached her hand across the table and Nico took it. "Juliette, do you want to talk?"

The girl looked at Dani and bit her lip, she shook her head. "Not really, not yet, it's just I almost felt guilty for not missing him; like I should have missed him sooner. I mean I was sad, but I didn't miss that phone call until today and I should have. He always called, always, unless he was home or I was there. Even if he was in a meeting, he'd call at twelve o six, six rings at twelve o six." She sniffed and fought back more tears.

Dani must have looked puzzled because Nico spoke. "Juliette was born on December sixth at six after twelve. Marshall said it was the happiest time and day of his life. The day he gave Juliette her first cell phone was when she turned thirteen. He called her at twelve o six and let it ring six times and told her the story of when she was born. She made him promise he would always call her if he wasn't home, every day at twelve o six and he did; every day as far as I know."

Juliette nodded and pulled away from Nico. "I never answered, that wasn't the point. It was dad's way of telling me he loved me. Sometimes, he'd call right back and leave a message or if I wanted to talk, I'd call him back, but lately we were talking more. Dad was pretty upset with mom." She stopped talking and turned back to her food, picking at her rice and then picked up her glass. "I think maybe I'll watch something on TV."

Nico frowned, but let her go.

Dani sighed. "She needs to grieve her own way Nico." She glanced at the man across from her and thought about his grieving process. She squeezed his hand. "How are you doing with losing Marshall?"

His head shot up and he looked at her suddenly as if the thought hadn't been in his head at all recently and he realized it hadn't. He'd been dealing with everyone else's problems he hadn't really processed his own feelings about Marshall. Every time he started something else came up. He shrugged. "I'll let you know when I get there."

"You have to work through it eventually."

He nodded. "I know and I want to, but there's been the good things with you." He smiled and touched her face. "That's been helpful by the way, and then there was Gabrielle and Juliette's drama and the shit with your kids and Mason and Tyler and the Hawks and the funeral specifics and…" he pulled an envelope from his jacket pocket, "I haven't even opened the letter from Marshall yet."

Dani's eyes went a bit wider as she sat forward. "Nico, you probably should do that."

He looked tortured and fingered the letter. He put it on the cherry table and let his finger trace the tight, neat script of his name on the front. When he turned the envelope over, it was sealed in red wax with a specially designed calligraphy MP in the center. Nico had bought Marshall that sealing set as a joke one Christmas a long time ago after a paranoid rant that someone might be opening his letters to Gabrielle before they were mailed. Nico never read those, he didn't want to know what Marshall said to Gabrielle, but he couldn't convince Marshall of that, so he'd bought the sealing set for him. To his knowledge, it had never been used. He'd thought Marshall had thrown it out, but here was proof he had not.

He looked up at Dani. "I honestly forgot about it, or maybe I wanted to forget." He played the envelope over in his hands. "It's like the funeral. This makes it real. Opening this confirms I was right, that he did kill himself. The funeral confirms he's gone." His voice cracked.

Dani nodded and stood so she was behind him. She wrapped her arms around him and kissed his cheek. "It's okay to feel that way, it's normal, but you have to move forward and you know that. You expected Juliette to do it, me to do it with Matt and you need to do it too. This is the next step Nico. If you want me to be there for this I will, but you might want to read what's in there by yourself." She shifted to the side of the chair so she could see his face. "I'll clean up, go to your office and if you need me let me know."

He kissed her and searched her face. "I…" He stopped himself and looked away. "Thank you." He stood and hugged her and then hurried up the spiral stairs before he said anything else.

Dani stood there and watched him go with a frown on her face, he'd been about to say something, but he'd stopped himself. The intensity on his face had made her shiver before he'd glanced away and thanked her. She looked over to see Juliette watching her. "Shit."

Juliette frowned and headed to the kitchen. "Let me help."

"You don't need to." Dani said as she cleared the plates, but honestly she wasn't sure even where the trash went. "But thank you."

Juliette, pulled a cabinet open and slid out a trash can on sliders. "The dishwasher's the drawer type." She pulled a drawer open and small dishwasher appeared. "It's usually just him you know and whatever woman he's sleeping with, so…" She shrugged.

Dani scraped food from the plate in her hand into the trash. "Juliette about what you saw."

"It's none of my business who you fuck Dr. Santino."

The plate almost slipped, but she tightened the grip and turned to Juliette. She gave her the steady, therapy look. "Juliette, please."

"Hey, he's hot, I know. I mean even I have the occasional get it on with Nico fantasy." She shoved a glass into the dishwasher so hard it broke. She started crying.

Dani grabbed her hand, but she wasn't bleeding. She pulled the girl into her arms. "Juliette, it's okay and I'm sorry. I'm not with Nico to hurt you. I care about him."

Juliette held onto Dani and sobbed into her shoulder for quite some time. "I'm…I'm sorry…it's just…shit…he's all I have left and I don't want to lose him too."

Dani pulled back and looked at the girl. "Juliette, Nico isn't going to let you go. I'm not going anywhere either, but you have to know he's never going to see you that way either."

Juliette pulled a paper towel from the roll inside the lower cabinet and wiped her nose and eyes. "But, what's wrong with me?"

"Nothing's wrong with you. You're beautiful, way more beautiful than your mother could ever be even, but he's like your father and that's how he sees himself when he looks at you."

She sniffed. "He's the only man who's ever treated me like he didn't want something from me, except maybe dad and even dad used me to get what he wanted sometimes, but never Nico. Never. That's why I love him."

Dani's heart broke for his girl all over again. She brushed hair from her face. "Oh Juliette, I'm so sorry but I promise there are good men out there. Men who will love you and treat you the way you deserve to be treated and you're right; you don't owe any man anything. What you have to give is a gift and you give it whenever you're ready and want to give it. Not because they think they deserve it for drinks, dinner or just because you owe it to them."

Juliette nodded. "And I'm sorry. I really like you Dani. I mean, Nico's been alone forever and really he never has women over as far as I know. I'm the only girl I know of that's been here. I'm not saying he doesn't have sex because I've seen him with women, but here I think is off limits, so if he's brought you here that's something."

"It's okay, let me finish." She waited for Juliette to move back to the couch and looked up to loft. She just missed Nico disappearing back into the shadow. She wondered if what the girl said was true but she couldn't help but think there had been other women here. Not that it mattered. She picked up a piece of glass and started cleaning up.

But what if, what if she was the only woman he let into his apartment. What did it mean and why did was she having this internal argument with herself all the time? She shouldn't be feeling anything this intense for Nico this soon. Not after just ending a serious relationship with Matt just so recently. She stopped; a piece of glass in her hand. She'd been attracted to Nico, she didn't deny it, even when she was with Matt, she'd been drawn to Nico, but had she been lying to herself about loving Matt? Had she let her infatuation with him and being out of her marriage make her feel like she was more in love with him than she had been? Had she really wanted something else?

She gasped as she gripped the glass too hard and it bit into the skin of her palm enough to hurt. She dropped it into the trashcan. It hadn't cut her. She wiped her face and shook her head. "Shit, get a hold of yourself Danielle." Her feelings weren't any clearer than they had been. "Space, you need some time away from him." She said to herself. He overwhelmed her. She took a breath and finished picking up the pieces of glass.


	12. I Can Barely Say

**_NOTE:_**Now for the next chapter...this one does have the letter from Marshall and we get to the funeral. **  
**

In response to a review: Yes, I'm a stickler for safer sex. I can't help it. You could blame it on my jobs, watching too many teens give birth, treating too many STDs and my volunteer work at the STD and birth control clinic as well as me teaching. Yes, I also teach. So, in my stories, with a rare exception, safer sex is in every scene I write, it's only not if there's a reason in the plot or my couple is completely committed. I write it in because well, it's real life, condoms aren't sexy, but they're part of real sex, and well I'd like to make that point some how. I know what I write is still fantasy, but I do like to think there's a touch of reality to to it.

* * *

**I Can Barely Say**

Nico leaned over the wall and listened in to their conversation before he opened his letter. He frowned. He had known Juliette felt that way about him, but he was disappointed that she thought he would abandon her. But then her mother had and her father was dead, she was dealing with some things right now. He couldn't judge her. Dani dealt with her well and he knew she would. He was glad she was there to handle it. Juliette hadn't learned how to deal with her sexuality well when she was young. She'd given herself away to anyone who would pay her attention and she got plenty of it. There was one more thing to thank Gabrielle for, the great gift of teaching her daughter to use herself to get what she wanted from men, regardless of what it cost her emotionally. He was surprised at how much it hurt him. He wanted to gut every man that ever touched Juliette. A few seconds later he found himself rolling his eyes as he wished Juliette would have kept her mouth shut about his own sexual history, but then when did the girl ever keep her mouth shut?

He moved away from the waist high wall with a sigh. He turned to his desk and sat in his chair. He was avoiding the letter and he knew it. With a grimace he pulled a silver letter opener from its holder and slid it under the wax. He worked it slowly to preserve the seal and managed to keep it intact. Then he opened the flap and removed the three sheets of Marshall's personal stationary.

The letter was hand written as Marshall's missives usually were; he didn't like to type and still used an old fountain pen. Nico smiled because the last time they'd been out in New York together they'd had to go to Arthur Brown and Brother for Marshall to buy new ink and ogle at pens. Marshall had spent over an hour discussing pens with one salesman. Nico unfolded the paper and took a breath.

_Nico,_

_So, I was thinking old friend that maybe I'd let you know a few things before everything imploded, or exploded or whichever way things actually did-plode, you let me know on that when we catch up later. I bet, you went on a merry ride when I went missing didn't you? And then I didn't show up at all and I know that had to really fuck with your head didn't it? I'm not sure they'll ever find my body and I don't care if they do, but in case they don't; I'm writing my prediction down, it wasn't the butler with the candlestick in the library-I did it to myself, with the plane. _

_And that whole time you were thinking, "Oh, that fucking bastard didn't do it. He couldn't have done it. He promised me he'd never do that." You're right I did promise you that. So, I'm sorry. I'm a thief and a liar and a poor excuse for your best friend. I don't know if you can understand not having any hope Nic, but it's where I am. I have none. It's not going to get better. Gabby left. She was the only thing I had left._

_I only ever had her because of you, so thank you for that. _

_I know you gave her up for me. I know you loved her, I'm not an idiot. I'm crazy and paranoid, and on my way to drunk, but I'm not so stupid that I couldn't see what was right in front of me and I know you loved her, at least at one time, a long time ago when you gave her up for me. For that brother, I am eternally grateful. I also know it's why you fucked her behind my back all those years and I forgive you, but not her. Never her. Bitch. I would have given her anything. I even gave her you, and it wasn't enough, those were good times my friend. We were all happy for a while. Until we weren't. _

_We had a lot of good times. Do you remember that what, two months, they let us stay out at the base in Yokosuka? Ah, that was fun. We were drunk about every day and I'm pretty sure that CO knew it was us that kept moving his car to the beach. I swear I don't think I'd ever seen a CO happier to see a team leave than when we finally shipped out. I wonder how long it took for him to realize that those bottles of scotch he had weren't scotch and did he ever miss those cigars? He was prick, so I don't care. _

_Hey, I took care of Dr. Dani's taxes so don't worry about her. I know you like her Careles. You be sure to tap that, because I sure as hell would. That woman has a sweet ass. As for the tapes, you should have them by now or be getting them soon. Gabrielle's hands shouldn't touch them, hell the bitch shouldn't even know about them and if she finds out, well I'm sorry and you can kill me. Oh, sorry, too late._

_Okay, now business Nico, business. I left the most important shit to the end._

_Juliette. God, she's fucking beautiful, I still can hardly believe she's really mine. I almost believed Gabby when she told me she was yours. I mean look at her, but before you go thinking it might really be true. I had it checked at four different labs. She's mine, but really look how fucked up she is. That has to be my genetic material right? Of course, between me and Gabby's fucked up relationship the poor girl didn't have a chance. The only saving grace she ever had was you. I mean that. You were the only rock she had. So, be there for her. Her mother's just going to use her. I hate to do this to you brother, but you know, "If it don't suck, we don't do it." _

_You need to take care of Juliette. If she relapses clean her up. You've done it for me and you've kept me clean for the past seventeen years. I want you to do that for my girl. You're strong enough for her. I couldn't do it, but you can. You can stand up to her mother when I couldn't. I don't have the ability to tell Gabby no, but you can Nico, you can, so do it for me. You tell that bitch no for me and take care of my baby. I need you to stop thinking that you couldn't help me. You need to let me go. It's unfortunate that you couldn't keep me alive, but that's not your fault Nicholas. Not your fault, so stop thinking it is._

_I'm just another fallen soldier and you have a job to do. So, pick yourself up, say your goodbyes, drink an entire bottle of scotch in my name, a ridiculously expensive one with a smooth finish, get pissed off your ass, fuck that sexy therapist and then wake up the next day and move on. That is how to honor my name. I believe we had that deal once. I could look it up. I actually wrote it down, we were taking some seriously horrible enemy fire one night and we agreed if one of us died, hell I think you took that shrapnel to the leg and we were waiting for evac that never came and we had to hump it out. It took all night because of your damn leg, but we finally made it out in the morning. You remember that? _

_So, if you were dead, I'd gladly fuck the therapist after drinking that twelve hundred dollar bottle of 1959 Glenfarclas I gave you three years ago. Since, we established we did agree to it- fuck off and do it Careles and don't argue with me._

_Anyway, I've let Gabby think she's going to get to control my money somehow, but that's not what's happening. Get a lawyer Nico, you're gonna need it, well you're going to need one to help you work around the trusts and the other legalese shit these big bobble-headed legal types spew from their mouths all the time. I mean, you're plenty smart with your fucking more than smart IQ, I know it's higher than mine by 2 points, you pointed it out five times after SEAL training. I don't care, I'm dead remember, and I was damn near a genius…shit, who's insecure here? _

_Stop confusing me. Okay, back to Juliette. You need to take care of her. Money is in a trust, I said that yet? Okay it will be. It's in the will, the real one. The decoy one Gabrielle has is to throw her off. I left her enough to shut her up, she should leave you alone, but you never know. Just tell her to go to hell like I never could. If she ends up here, even better then maybe I can torture her for eternity. The Hawks will be sold like the plan was anyway. I don't know who will buy them, but your job is attached. It will be for as long as you want it. I left you money and well, you can do what you want, but the job, it's yours. Okay, said that. Oh, make sure Juliette knows that if she would have come with me I wouldn't have crashed. I wanted her with me to prove to myself there was hope. See, no hope. Her mother said no, so you got this letter. Told you that and see what happened, see. See, no and then crash. Did you know? Okay, you tell her that I love her right brother? Make sure she knows because I do. She's the best thing I ever did with my life. Nothing better, but I fucked her up too, but she's still the best._

_So, you move on. Drink that scotch, fuck that hot ass and move on. I loved you._

_-Marshall_

_Sure I am this day we are masters of our fate, that the task which has been set before us is not above our strength-Churchill_

Tears ran down Nico's face and he had to wipe them away several times while he read the letter. He'd laughed a couple of times, smiled and even sobbed, but he'd made it through and now he sat and reread it. He could hear Marshall in his head as he read it. He put the letter on his desk and leaned back in his chair with his eyes closed. He saw his friend's face and in reality, he wanted to punch him. How he could hate and love the same person with an equal amount of emotion, he wasn't really sure.

"Nico?"

Dani's voice startled him from his thoughts. He hadn't heard her come up the stairs and he opened his eyes to find her standing on the other side of his desk. He leaned forward in his chair and wiped his eyes as he folded the letter closer.

"Dani, sorry…I, is something wrong?" Concern crept into his voice.

She shook her head and moved around the desk. "No and I don't mean to bother you, it's just I wanted to tell you I was going to go see Lindsay and Ray Jay." She took his hand and didn't protest when he pulled her into his lap. "Are you alright though?" She frowned and smoothed the lines on his forehead.

He nodded as he brushed her hair behind her shoulder. "I will be. Are you sure you are?" He watched her face. "Vic's there with the kids now, so they're safe, but I know not being able to take your kids home can't be easy for you."

"What do you mean?" Dani sat back and looked at him. "I figured I'd pick them up, and head home."

"That's out of the question Dani. You don't go home until the threat is eliminated. That means both Tyler and Mason are in police custody or I have the situation completely under control. Neither of those things has happened. Until it does, you and your family need to stay out of harm's way." His hand slid around her waist and he pulled her closer. "I'm not risking you getting hurt.

"But Nico, I have a life, a home and the kids have school, friends, their own lives. We can't just walk away because some jackass kids make some threat."

"It's out of the question. You'll stay with the kids tonight, or with me, I don't care, but you aren't staying at the house. I can take you home to pick up some things you might need. I know you'll need clothes for the funeral. I'm sure the kids need things for school, but staying there is completely out of the question." Nico's voice was matter of fact, not harsh or condescending.

Dani was stunned, but she nodded. "Fine." She stood and moved toward the stairs, "Fine, I'm heading out then. I already called a cab." Her tone was short and curt.

Nico frowned and stood, taking her hand before she reached the stairs. "Dani, don't be angry or stubborn. I'm going to keep you safe. It's my job and I promised you I'd do it."

She sighed, he was right, but she didn't have to like it. "I know, I don't have to like it. I'm not used to feeling helpless Nico." She glared at him, her jaw clenched.

He pulled her closer and pressed his mouth to her ear. "You have a bad habit of doing that."

She gave him a harsh look, "Doing what?"

He smirked and kissed her ear as he slid a hand down her side. "Pouting; first, with the panties, and then again now…maybe I really should punish you?" His hand slid up her thigh and he felt her shiver as his voice took on that low seductive tone he knew made goose bumps rise on her arms. "Have you ever had a spanking fantasy Dani?" He tried not to laugh when she made a choking sound.

Dani stiffened and her eyes went wide as her head shot up. Her voice was barely a whisper, "What?" Her wild eyes found his and it was only then that she saw humor in his eyes. "Oh, you better not be serious…" She slapped his arm and giggled nervously. "Because I don't think it's funny."

He gave her an ornery smile, "Well, baby I don't think it's funny either..." He kissed her and then let her go with a good natured laugh. "Okay, how about you bring the kids back here for dinner and I'll cook. I'll send Ronnie home for dinner, she needs a break anyway, and Tommy will stop by while she's gone. I figure between Lindsay and Ray Jay, Tommy will be fine here. Then you and I will go to your place after dinner to pick up whatever it is you need for tomorrow while the kids stay here. Ronnie can come back around midnight."

Dani sighed. "Okay." She didn't really want to stay away from home, or at least keep the kids away, but if Nico thought it was dangerous. "Couldn't we stay at my mom's place?"

Nico considered it and then shook his head. "The kids could stay at Ray's if you wanted."

Dani frowned, immediately vetoing that. "No. I'd rather know what was going on." She put a hand to his cheek. "You update me and keep me in the loop and I don't trust Ray to do that." She kissed him gently on the lips." Where am I going by the way?"

Nico smiled. "I put you and the kids up at the Marriott, they're four suites down from the one I'm currently in."

Dani found herself blushing. "Oh god…that's not awkward." She smiled. "How am I going to sleep with you just down the hall?"

Nico shrugged and pulled her back into his arms. "Well, you could sneak down the hall. I'll tell you the secret password." He brushed her lips lightly and then pulled back. "Just tell the kids we were having a strategy meeting."

She gave him a serious look. "You're funny. And don't think I forgot what you came up here for. If you need to talk you let me know. I'm sure whatever Marshall had to say wasn't all easy to hear."

He took a step away and avoiding her prompting, he again changed the subject. "You better go. I'm sure your cab is here."

She frowned at him and decided not to press him. "I will, if you need me. I'll be there." She turned to go.

He slapped her ass. "I know, now get going." He smiled when she jumped.

"Nico Careles." She hissed at him and rubbed her offended cheek as she headed to the stairs.

"Oh don't tell me you don't like it Dr. Santino." He winked.

She didn't try, because he was right. She couldn't, but she left with the nagging feeling that Nico still had plenty to work through.

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It wasn't the alarm, but the phone that woke him. He rolled and pulled the phone from the night stand.

It was AJ and it was four am. "Careles. Tell me it's done." He flipped on the bedside lamp and blinked at the sudden light.

"I found what I was looking for and so did the cops."

Nico could hear activity in the background. "Where are you?" He sat up on the edge of the bed, shoving the blankets out of his way.

"I'm still in the Hamptons. At the moment I'm watching the DEA empty the house and they have Mason in custody. I talked to my guy and he knows about the video, you won't have too much to worry about boss. He didn't just film shit, he titled each girl first name and age with a date. You're not gonna like this, but that makes sense since he was selling them, so copies of our target are probably out."

Nico wanted to throw up, but he swallowed against the instinct. "What about Tyler anything to tie him into any of this?"

There was some whooshing, probably a helicopter flying in and then AJ spoke again. "They should be arresting him soon. Some of the videos included other men, I saw two recent ones with him in them. He's eighteen, one of the girls wasn't, but it didn't matter neither of the girls was in any shape to give consent, legal age or not. I was sure to point out who he was to my contact without telling him how I knew."

"Fucking sick kids." Nico stood and walked to the bathroom he filled a glass with water. "Good job AJ." He took a long swallow and stood there in the dim light from the bedroom.

"Thanks, and you aren't kidding about the sick part, and be glad you didn't have to sift through this shit. I'm going to have nightmares for months and my girls are going to wonder why they can't date again for the next year and half." It was quiet for a beat and then he added. "Vic called me about fifteen minutes ago and said that two cars just set up outside the Harper house. He's pretty sure it's the State Police, probably SBI. He was going to call you, but I said I'd update you since I had to call you anyway."

"That's fine and good work, you're done there. Head home, are you sure there are no copies of Miss Pittman on those drives?"

AJ took a breath. "Boss, they were selling them, trading them, but I wiped hers from the main drive. If you want a copy there's one on the flash. I copied his original drive before I searched it. I have everything he has. I was going to erase it when I hung up after I told you about it, but again there is no guarantee that there isn't another copy out there on someone else's drive. I only have what was on his drive."

Nico's hand shook. God, he didn't want to think about it. He didn't want to know what might be on that video. "Is there anything else on that drive that might be of use?"

"I didn't really have a chance to go through much of anything else boss. I was looking for the videos, so there might be." He made a sound. "There's some financial stuff, but the DEA and cops now have the same stuff. I can wipe this copy in two seconds."

Nico looked in the mirror. "Wipe her video only and do it tonight. Keep the rest and go through it, see if there's anything we need just in case, but that can wait just a bit." Back up, plan for redundancies, plan again, be prepared… "Keep me posted as usual and thank you AJ. Take a couple weeks off, my treat. Take your wife and girls someplace warm."

"I ah…really? Thanks boss." AJ sounded stunned, "I guess I'll see you at the funeral today then."

"Yea, see you and thanks." Nico hung up and put the phone on the counter. He stared at himself in the mirror and frowned. He looked tired, he felt old. He was glad Mason was in custody and sure that Tyler wasn't going to be a problem at this point, but the news about Juliette and all those other girls. He picked up his phone and scrolled his contact list before he hit send.

She picked up on the second ring. "Nico? You okay? Is it something with Tyler?" She didn't sound like she was asleep. "Should I come down there? Never mind, I'm already coming, open the door."

He didn't hesitate and moved to the door, flipping open the locks and then opening the door when she knocked. He didn't care that he was naked, hell he hadn't even given it a second thought, but when Dani's eyes went wide he suddenly realized. He smiled. "Let me grab a robe."

She shook her head. "Well, I now know you sleep naked." She watched him head to the bathroom and pull a robe from the hook and slip it on. Then he was back. "So, okay what's wrong?"

He grabbed her and pulled her against his chest. He didn't say anything just held her, desperate to feel her against him. He needed to know she was there that he wasn't alone in this. "I just needed you here. Sorry, if I woke you up."

She slipped her arms around him. "I was awake." She lifted her head to look up at him sheepishly. "I missed you, even just talking to you."

He took her hand and led her to bed. He pulled her in with him and settled her against his chest. "AJ called. They arrested Mason and the State Police have Tyler under surveillance."

"For what?" She sat up and looked at him. "I doubt this has anything to do with threatening my kids."

He shook his head. "It's more complicated than that." She had her hair pulled back at the nape of her neck and he loosened her hair from the elastic band and ran his fingers through it while he spoke. "There's drugs and pornography." He swallowed hard and looked her in the eye. "Mason and the people he'd been working with and to some degree Tyler have been getting girls hooked on drugs and then filming them. Selling the videos." I'm glad Lindsay was smart enough to never get near Tyler, because I'm pretty sure that's what he was looking for. Some of the girls are young Dani."

"What?" She pulled back with a disgusted face. "How young?"

"I'm not sure. AJ only said underage."

"AJ saw some of the videos? How?" Dani grabbed Nico's hand, it was soothing and distracting and she was trying to pay attention.

"I had him hack into Mason's computer." He looked away. "He had video of Juliette."

"Shit." Dani swallowed. "Nico, I'm so sorry."

"It's not your fault Dani. You didn't turn her into a junkie, hell Mason didn't really do that either. Most of it is her fucked up family life, and she has to take a huge part of that responsibility." He realized he'd fisted his hands and relaxed them.

"Yes, she was using drugs, and that made her vulnerable, but Mason still used that to get what he wanted. She was still his victim Nico. I know you know that and right now you're angry and hurt." She turned his face to hers. "I also know you're really angry at Mason, but you have some anger at her too and that's okay. You blame her some because you tried to help her so many times and you're right she does have some responsibility, but you remember how she was in your apartment? How she was hurting and you couldn't let her keep hurting?"

He nodded as his eyes filled with tears at the thought. "Yes." His voice was barely a whisper.

"Now imagine she felt that way, only worse and someone promised her drugs if she did something for them. Something she would never do sober, she says no, the pain gets worse, the need…they offer again. All you have to do is have sex, let us do this…and you can be as high as you want when we do it." She swallowed, she saw the pain on his face. "You pushed the drug into her veins two days ago Nico so she wouldn't hurt. What do you think she'd do to herself so she wouldn't hurt?"

"Oh god…" He pulled Dani against his chest with a strangled sob. She was right and he needed to stop being angry at Juliette. He hadn't really admitted he was, but Dani made him realize he was. He kept saying he was angry at Mason, but he'd been holding it inside and it was eating him up. "I don't want to be angry at her Dani, but I can't help it. I tried to help her and she kept pushing me away…" He pulled back. "It was like Marshall all over again. I don't want to lose her too, she's all I have left of him."

Dani held him and let him cry. There wasn't much she could do. Grief was a strange creature and everyone needed to deal in their own way. Sometimes people followed the steps like they were supposed to and sometimes people skipped a few. Nico didn't seem like the type to bargain with anyone. He wasn't just losing his best friend either. He had to deal with Gabrielle and his new place in Juliette's life as well. All she could do was help him. "I'm here for you Nico." She rocked and stroked his hair like she would with her kids, there wasn't much else she could do. Her heart broke for him.

He pulled back and he searched her face. "Dani," He gripped her shoulders and then he cradled her head. "You're an amazing woman." He kissed her softly. He hadn't meant it more than a soft press of lips, but Dani's hands slid into his hair and she pulled him close with a soft groan and when her sweet mouth opened under his he didn't argue as he realized how much he needed her. He let her explore his mouth with her tongue for a few seconds before he took control and with a shift of his weight she was under him on the bed.

She gasped at the sudden change in position and then Nico's warm hand was sliding under the hem of her knee length, cotton nightshirt and she was suddenly hot and shivering at the same time. His hand was tugging her panties aside seconds later and she arched up against his fingers. She pulled her mouth from his and took a much needed breath. "Nico…" She looked at him, his eyes were dark, dangerous and still haunted. "Is this what you want?"

His smile was all predator. He took her hand and pressed it against his straining cock. "What do you think Dani?" He moaned softly when she stroked him. "I always want you." He pushed the plain grey nightshirt higher, exposing her breasts. "Think about you all the time." He pressed a kiss to her belly and then the bottom of her ribcage before pulling her right nipple into his mouth.

She arched up under him as her hands sank into his hair.

He pulled back, dragging his teeth over her nipple. "You're a distraction Dani and I think the only way to get you out of my system is to fuck you senseless." He bent and took her other nipple in his mouth and gave it the same attention.

Dani pulled her shirt off in frustration and shoved the robe down Nico's arms. "Good…yes. Glad I'm not the only one distracted." She tugged his hair and pulled him back up so she could kiss him again even as she worked her panties down her hips with her other hand. She wanted him, now. "I woke up…" She kissed him and pulled back, watched his face, "I was so hot and wet…" she bit her lip and kicked her panties off as she spread her legs and cradled him between her hips with a low moan. "I needed you so much…wanted to touch myself, but the kids…"

Nico watched the flush creep up her chest and face and rocked his hips against her. "Mm, I want you Dani, so much." He kissed her again, hard and fast and then reached into the drawer of the bedside table. He'd prepared this time and ripped open the condom with his teeth before he slipped it on. He pressed against Dani with a soft gasp as he slid inside.

"Nico…it's okay I know." She pulled him close and wrapped her legs around his hips rocking up against him slowly. Her mouth found his and she kissed him slow and deep as their bodies found a slow easy pace.

This was so much different than before, there was no hurried passion. This was a slow steady passionate burn and they moved together slow and easy. Their bodies pushing, pulling, meeting, parting and rolling together and each touch and thrust built on the last, building, stoking the ember until they were both breathless, panting and sweating. Their skin was slick and sliding together as they watched each other climb higher.

Nico pulled back and found Dani's eyes as he pulled back and hovered over her just a second longer than he had been and she noticed and hitched her hips to match the change. Their bodies were in sync and he took her hand in his as he moved. He could feel her pulse and he kissed her his pace increased, knowing she'd need more to push her closer. Her breath was hitching and he knew she was close. He was starting to know her body.

"You're so sexy…Dani…god, I'm so lucky." He pulled back, slow and long and slid in deep. He felt her shudder around him. "Every time you do that…god…" He repeated the same stroke and moaned when he felt her muscles tighten. He rose up on his knees a bit to change his angle, but he didn't change the pace. He ran a hand down her body and over her breasts. "Like a goddess."

No one had ever talked to her during sex like Nico did. No one ever made her feel so sexy, so beautiful, so desirable. She moaned and arched up under him. "Nico…I" She didn't know what she wanted to say. What did she think, how did she feel? She didn't know.

"What Danielle?" He moved again, bent over her, pulled her up so she was in his lap and he thrust up into her. His hands were on her hips. "Tell me." He kissed her now, hard. He was still in control.

Dani's hands found his shoulders and she moved with him and strained against him. She was close now and lifted up and down with him. "Please, please…" her head fell back as she held his shoulder with one hand and her right hand fell between them to stroke herself. "Nico…"

He watched her sensuous dance as she moved and touched herself. "You are just so beautiful, baby." He kept up a steady pace, followed her lead and didn't stop when her hand tightened on his shoulder and then her head lifted and her eyes widened and found his. He smiled at her and then crushed her mouth to his as he increased his pace to find his own release. He pulled his mouth from hers and panted over her shoulder as he came with a strangled cry buried deep inside. "Oh, my god Dani…." He pulled her tight to his chest and couldn't stop the tears or the emotion. He wiped his face and stayed there several long seconds and then he pulled out and rolled over to take care of things before facing Dani.

She was on her back looking up at him. She smiled.

He laid his head on her chest. "Is there a way to fast forward today?"

Dani shook her head and ran her fingers through his damp hair. "No. I wish there was, but I'll be there with you and Juliette every step."

"I know and I appreciate it more than you'll ever know." He took her hand and pressed a kiss to the back. "I wish I could stop doing my job today too." He sighed and lifted his head and rolled to his belly to look Dani in the eye." He propped himself on his elbows. "I have to brief the security team at the church at nine. The viewing starts at ten for family, the public arrives at eleven for the funeral with graveside service for family and close friends and associates only to follow." He glanced at the clock. "It's five thirty."

She sat up in a near panic. "Shit, then it's time to get the kids up if they're going to school they'll need to get moving." She was up looking for her nightshirt and panties. "Where's my shirt and by the way, what's the deal answering the door naked?" She put her hands on her hips. "I mean what if it wasn't me at the door?"

Nico found her night gown on the floor on the other side of the bed and held it out to her. "First, you told me you were coming, so who else would it be? Second, I always sleep naked, you might want to get used to it." He winked.

Dani took her shirt and pulled it over her head. "Hmm," she didn't add that may need to change his habit if he was going to be sleeping over her house because she didn't know what was going on with the relationship. Hell, they'd been sleeping together for less than a week. Did that even count as a relationship? But…She shook her head. "I better go wake the kids. It's okay to send them to school?"

He pulled her against him and nodded. "Yes, I'm sure they'll be fine and you should be fine to go home tonight." He kissed her softly.

She rested her head to his chest. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." He hugged her. "Before you go and get the kids moving you might want your panties." He pulled them from under the sheets where she'd left them. "You were in a bit of a hurry to get them off." He cocked his eyebrow at her. "You didn't like going commando last time."

She pulled them from his hand with a growl and slipped them on under her nightgown. She glared up at him.

He held up his hand. "What? I didn't hide them this time." He smirked. "Go, get the kids up and I'll order us breakfast."

She shook her head. "You're incorrigible."

He smiled. "I have admitted to that before, now get."

She turned and left with a small smile on her face. She was happy to find the kids still fast asleep when she opened the door.

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Danielle was amazed that Gabrielle behaved herself, maybe it was because they were in a church. The viewing and funeral had been quiet, but right now as she watched as Gabrielle leaned on Nico in the receiving line she wanted to scratch the other woman's eyes out. She saw the disgust on his face, but he was trying to prevent a scene. Juliette was quiet, almost catatonic as she stood on his other side, with a death grip on his hand. Dani wished she could be there for both of them, but she knew she didn't belong in the line.

There would be a smaller group heading to the cemetery, but the group was still sizable. Danielle had been shocked to see Nico in his Navy uniform. For some reason, she hadn't expected it and found he was even sexier in it than she would have thought. There were other sailors in attendance, the honor guard of course, but Nico had obviously known a couple of the others by name and had spent several minutes with them. There had been tight hugs and even wiped eyes in front of the casket.

Nico walked Gabrielle to her car and then returned for Dani, she watched as he removed his cap and tucked it under his arm.

"I'm not riding with her and I'm not letting Juliette go with her either. We're taking a separate car." He held out an arm and waited for her to take it, when she did he escorted her to the door and donned his hat once again. "I'm sorry about her by the way."

Dani shook her head. "Don't be. I'm not worried about her." She squeezed his hand as he helped her down the steps to the waiting limo. "How's Juliette holding up?"

He shook his head. "Not well Dani." He opened the door and held her hand as she got in and then entered himself, again taking off his hat.

Juliette was curled in a ball crying and as soon as Dani was inside she launched herself at her and held on as if her life depended on it. "I can….can't do this…" She looked at Dani and wiped her face on a cloth handkerchief. "I…I…please…" She buried her head against Dani's shoulder and sobbed.

Dani looked at Nico, helpless and he wiped his eyes and looked back just as helpless.

"I don't know Dani, I can't help her." The car started moving and he watched the two women across the seat from him. "There's alcohol, but that's not really going to help her."

Dani held her and let her cry. "She needs to grieve, we just need to let her." She kissed the girl's hair and whispered reassurances to her.

Juliette sniffed. "Gabby said we have…have to do dad's will today." She looked at Nico with her head still pressed against Dani's chest. "Why? Can't we just bury him…fuck her…can't I have today for that?"

Nico closed his eyes. The girl was right. Why did Gabrielle have to do the will today? "I don't know Juliette, your mother is trying to drive you and me crazy."

"She's a fucking bitch." She sat up, angry now. "She wants to hurt me."

He nodded and wiped his face. "Yes, probably hurt me too."

Dani took Juliette's hand. "Today's almost over."

The girl looked at Dani. "Thank god, I'm not sure I can do more of today."

Nico sighed, "Me either." He rested his head on the seatback and closed his eyes. He felt sick and he was exhausted.

It was quiet until Nico's phone rang.

He sighed and pulled it from his pocket. "Shit." He answered. "Gabrielle, what?"

"No, she's going to be where ever Juliette needs to be…because that's how it is Gabby…You should have thought about that before you stuck a needle in your daughter's arm." He punched the seat beside him and somehow managed to keep his voice steady. "You were the one who wanted her to keep Juliette from hurting herself…well, Marshall's letter put me in charge of Juliette's well being. Oh that's rich coming from you, mother of the fucking year…You do not want to start with me Gabby, trust me. I am not in the mood. You might not love Marshall, but I do and I'm about to put my best friend in the ground, so stay the fuck out of my way. If you want to do the will right after this at the lawyer's fine, but Dani's going to be there because Juliette needs her there. There is no compromise."

He stared straight ahead, his jaw was clenched and his eyes were burning.

Juliette buried her head in Dani's shoulder and whispered, "I hate her, I hate her, I hate her…" over and over.

Dani stroked her head and tried not to cry. Professional detachment was not working for her. She was too involved and she cared too much for the man across from her and even the girl in her arms.

Nico hung up and dropped the phone onto the seat. "That woman is too damn much." He watched Dani. He knew she was struggling with her own feelings because he was barely keeping himself afloat. "Juliette, come here." He opened his arms and the girl was in them in seconds. He held her and she sobbed into his chest. "Shh, it's okay and I'm here, so is Dani. No matter what, we're here for you."

She nodded and clung to him, eventually she calmed against him, occasionally hiccupping.

He glanced to Dani and mouthed, "Thank you."

She smiled sadly and nodded. "Who were the other sailors?"

He cleared his throat. "I don't know the honor guard, but the three I talked to were on our SEAL team in Iraq. Matthews was an LT at the time. He's a good guy, but he was a bit of a stick in the mud back then. The other two were enlisted, Parker and Sanchez." He smiled and shook his head as he pulled Juliette a bit closer. "The four of us used to get into all kinds of trouble, so we were talking about how much of it was actually Marshall's idea."

Dani smiled. "Let me guess, most of it?"

Nico snorted, "Almost all of it."

Juliette giggled a bit. "I bet. He was always looking to play some kind joke on someone."

"Yes, yes he was." His smile fell a bit. "I'm just going to miss him." He kissed Juliette's temple.

She pressed a kiss to his cheek. "Me too." She hugged him.

The rest of the ride was quiet and by the time the car arrived at the grave site the three of them were reasonably composed. Nico kissed both of them on the cheek and then left to take his place as a pallbearer.

Juliette tucked herself against Dani's side and wrapped an arm around Dani's. "I'm not standing with Gabby. I mean, I will, but not without you and Nico this time."

Dani nodded. "That's fine, wherever you want me Juliette."

"Thank you." The girl's hand gripped Dani's and together they moved toward the shelter tent over the grave.

Gabrielle was already seated and she scowled as Dani and Juliette approached. There were three seats set up in the front row for family. Obviously they were meant for the two Pittman women and Nico. When Dani approached with Juliette glued to her side it was Xeno who stepped forward with another chair and set it down.

Gabrielle turned around and glared. She opened her mouth, but snapped it shut as the casket approached.

Dani grabbed Xeno's hand. "Thank you."

He blushed and ducked his head. "Thanks for taking care of Miss Pittman for the boss Dr. Dani." Then he turned and headed to the back of the crowd to take his place.

Dani and Juliette settled into their chairs and watched as the casket was brought in and set down. The pallbearers were a mix of sailors and civilians. Dani only knew Nico. She'd seen Matt and Griffin at the funeral earlier and they were both here now. So were several other of the players, but most had paid their respects at the funeral and left. She looked up and was surprised to see TK swaggering toward her.

He was more subdued than usual, but still he was all TK. "Dr. Dani, yo and before you get your professional panties all twisted up." He flashed a big smile. "Corinne's here with me." He pointed toward the back of the shelter.

Corinne held up a hand and Dani motioned back, the other woman didn't look particularly happy about being here.

Dani took a breath. "Terrence, you need to take your seat." Juliette was still gripping her arm and now Gabrielle was glaring.

Instead of heading back he found an empty chair in the row behind them and pulled it to the front and set it down on the other side of Dani. "I'm good now." He smiled and then looked to Juliette for the first time. He held his hand out. "Hey, I'm TK and I'm really sorry about your dad. He threatened my ass all the time, but ultimately he was good to me."

Dani held her breath.

Juliette lifted her head and looked at the man. "Thanks." She took TK's hand. "You're the first person to say something honest to me other than Dani and Nico."

TK nudged Dani's shoulder. "Well, Dr. Dani always tells it like it is and Nico, well," he held up his pinky, "he can kill you with his pinky finger and his sunglasses." He winked at her.

She smiled at him and sat up a bit.

Dani leaned to TK, "Thanks."

He lowered his sunglasses and winked. "I got mad skillz doc, mad skillz." He smiled and stretched out in his chair until Nico glared as he took his seat beside Juliette. Then he straightened up like a scolded school child and looked down at his shoes.

"What is he doing here Dani?" He leaned around Juliette.

"Corinne is here with him." She motioned with her head and saw Nico glance toward the back. "I didn't notify him, so I assume the team did."

He grunted and then the service started and their attention was on the speaker.

The service was short. There was the playing of Taps and the presentation of the flag to Gabrielle and then the firing of the guns by the honor guard. Gabrielle tossed a handful of dirt on the casket and walked away as the casket was lowered.

Nico glared at her back and bit back a curse when her daughter fell apart. He pulled the girl to his side. "It's okay sweetheart. Say your goodbye." He wiped his eyes. "She's walked away from you for the last time. You don't need her anymore."

She sniffed and reached into the pocket of her jacket. She pulled something out and played with it. She looked back to Dani and reached for her hand.

Dani took it. "It's okay Juliette. I'm here for you no matter what."

She nodded and held up a gold chain. "I had Lindsay help me last night. There's twelve rings…" She wiped her face. "Twelve reasons I loved him." She looked to Dani, "Your kid's a lot like you, she has good ideas." She looked to Nico, "By the way you need more rice flour we used it for the papier-mâché."

Dani bit back a sob and turned her face into Nico's shoulder. She wanted to hug Lindsay right now.

Juliette undid the chain and took the first small ring off. She read the neatly printed words on the gold painted ring. "You taught me to fly." She smiled and threw the ring into the grave. "It was one of his favorite things and I only have a five hour solo flight and I'm licensed."

Even Nico didn't know that.

The next ring was silver and she pulled it off the chain. "You taught me to laugh. Really laugh at a good joke." The next one was, "You read me the Wizard of Oz four times and you changed it every time. I had to read it on my own to find out that none of the versions you read me were the real one, but I'm pretty sure you had the damn book memorized."

Nico had his arm around Dani's shoulder as Juliette went through all of the rings. The last two hit him hard.

"You loved me dad and you tried to protect me." She was sobbing at this point and wiped her face. "You tried and I loved you for it. You didn't always do it right, but you tried you idiot, fuck head." She laughed and threw the ring into the grave. The last ring was in her hand and she held it, turned it over. "The last one, one of the best things and best ways you tried to protect me." She looked up at Nico. "You kept Nico with us. I know it was hard dad, but it was the right thing, so thank you." She bit back a sob and tossed the ring into the grave just as her legs gave out.

Nico caught her and pulled her up. "Juliette, I wouldn't have left you even if he made me. I couldn't, I love you." He was crying now and he didn't try to stop his tears. He knew there wasn't any way he could. He simply knelt with Juliette in his arms and cried with her by Marshall's open grave as the sky clouded over.


	13. The Faded Line

**_NOTE:_**Just a lot of angsty goodness in this chapter. There's talk...talk...and more talk. Sometimes that's what happens. I kept TK around a little longer because he was fun and I missed him. We needed a good long conversation between Dani and Nico, they have to work a few things out...so they start here, but they aren't done.

If you didn't check out my little companion piece, **Shades of Chardonnay and Chick Lit,** it's fun and smutty and loosely related to this story, after all it was Nico who put the idea in Dani's head! Hopefully, you'll like it. If you hate it, that's okay too :) I needed a break from angst. If you ever have a request for a quick fic, feel free to PM me, I make no guarantees, but sometimes it's fun to play in someone else's sandbox. You can also reach me on Twitter at SciFiRN.

* * *

**The Faded Line **

It started raining sometime. Dani wasn't sure when, but she stepped away from the gravesite where Nico and Juliette were under the shelter and out into the rain.

Xeno held an umbrella for her and she thanked him through her tears, but it was TK who actually escorted her to the limo.

"Come on Dr. Dani, let's get you inside." He frowned and slid into the car with her.

Dani was surprised to find Corinne inside as well. She hugged the other woman and accepted a tissue from her to wipe her face. "What are you doing here? I was shocked to see you and TK."

Corrine sat back and gave TK a slightly annoyed glance before taking Dani's hand. "First, are you okay? I didn't realize you knew Marshall Pittman that well."

Dani made a funny sound in her throat. "I don't. It's his daughter and Nico Careles I'm close with and they aren't doing well."

The woman nodded. "Then I'm sorry for your loss Dani, really."

"Thanks." She wiped her nose and dabbed at her eyes. "I had to leave them. They needed some time together right now." She shrugged. "I wish I knew how to help."

"You are helping, I'm sure and to answer your other question, I'm here because Terrence insisted he come for you." She smiled at Dani. "He said you'd want to see him here and I figured it wouldn't hurt."

Dani turned to TK and took his hand. She actually was glad to see him. "Thanks, you actually made Juliette smile." She squeezed his hand. "How's rehab going?"

He shrugged. "It's going. I'm knocking it down in style Dr. D." He mimed a boxer. "You know, line the days up and bam, pow, down they go." He pushed his sunglasses up on top of his head. He sighed and leaned closer. "Some days are good and some days are bad, but I'm starting to have more of the good ones, really."

Corinne nodded and sat back, she was proud of the progress he'd made. "He's getting there Dani."

"I'm glad Terrence. I told you it wouldn't be easy and even now there are going to be bad days."

He nodded. "I gotcha, I know, one day at a time, if that's too much take it one minute at a time." He touched his nose. "See, I'm drinking the cool-aid now, doc." He winked and gave her a big smile. "I guess it's better than swallowing the pills. Am I right? Am I right?"

She rolled her eyes at him. "Did I actually say I missed you?" She smiled and playfully shoved his leg before she turned to Corinne. "I'm glad you're here actually. I needed to talk to you about Juliette. She's an addict and I've had her to see Dr. Harlan."

The other woman sat forward, interested. "Pills or heroin?"

"Heroin and the story is complicated, but he started her on methadone two days ago. She's ready for rehab and I've been working with her some, but she needs intensive therapy." Dani played with the hem of her jacket and glanced back toward the gravesite. Nico and Juliette were both standing now.

"Do you want to place her in my group?" Corinne followed Dani's gaze. "She's on the young side, but I have a few kids her age."

"Whoa, the girl's not much younger than me." TK interjected. "Ya'll trying to make me out to be an old man."

Dani snorted. "Trust me TK, I'd never confuse you for a grown up."

He held his stomach and pretended to laugh hysterically and then suddenly stopped and looked at her seriously. "You wound me, Dr. D." He put his hand on his heart.

She patted his knee and winked at him. "I'm sure you'll be fine TK." She turned her attention back to Corrine. "I just need to get her in somewhere. I think an inpatient group would be good, maybe with a furlough on weekends. She needs some stability, and I think being with Nico on Friday and Saturday nights would be good for her." She took a breath. "I'd be willing to supervise those visits and her medications."

Corinne nodded. "I think we could arrange that if she's in agreement. Maybe wait until Monday to move her in though. She needs what she has here now." She motioned to the couple coming toward the car under Xeno's umbrella. "I saw you with her as well. She trusts both of you."

Dani nodded and glanced to TK, who had his arms crossed. She sighed. "What's wrong Terrence?"

"Why can't I get out of the cage on the weekends? Like what? She gets good behavior or something?"

Dani shook her head. "It's not that and you know it."

The door opened and Juliette slid inside. She squeezed in beside Corinne and Dani which left the seat open beside TK. Nico noticed the crowd and frowned.

"I don't remember there being quite this many people earlier." He set his cover on his knee and raised his eyebrow at TK in particular. "Is there something I can do for you Terrence?"

"Oh come on Nico, you haven't seen me in like two weeks and you're gonna be that way? I thought we had a thing." TK held out his hand waiting for Nico to take it.

Nico wasn't in the mood. He looked to Corinne. "Can we drop you somewhere Ms. Walsh?"

Corinne nodded. "We're parked by the entrance." She turned to Juliette. "I'm Corinne, a friend of Dani's and I'm so sorry about your dad."

Juliette looked to Dani and when she nodded at her and smiled, Juliette sniffed. "Thanks." She leaned into Dani's shoulder and didn't complain when Dani put her arm around her.

The car moved slowly through the cemetery and Nico had it stop at the entrance so Corinne and TK could get out. Dani grabbed Corinne's hand. "I'll call you later."

"Good." Corinne looked to Nico. "We have some things to talk about, all of us." She motioned to TK. "Come on, it's time to get back before you turn into a pumpkin or something."

TK laughed. "Nah, I'm a city boy, and TK-derella don't do pumpkins…maybe a fire hydrant or a rat, but not a pumpkin." He winked at Juliette. "I'll catch up with all of you later." He turned and pointed to Nico. "You too Nico, so stop pretending we don't have something special Captain Bite-me." He flashed him a thousand kilowatt smile and then leaned over and then hugged Dani. "You, I miss you and my lounging all loose on your couch cushions and spilling my guts. Corinne ain't nothing like you Dr. D. Trust me. She gets all up in my grill." He held his hands an inch from his face and then wiggled them. "But, she doesn't let me think through things like you do." He sighed, "Somehow she's still doing her thang, cause I'm learning the steps and doing this whole sober thing." His intonation rose and he cocked his head to the side.

He looked to Juliette again, suddenly serious. "I know it's hard babygirl, cause I been there." He took the girl's hand. "But Dr. D and Nico and even sour puss Corinne over there, they can get you cleaned up. I mean it. Even me, I didn't want this, but I'm doing it now and it's worth it. So, keep it up, blondie. Just don't give up." He winked at her and then followed Corinne out the door, shutting it behind him.

Nico sighed. "Where the hell did inspirational TK come from?"

"Sobriety." Dani smiled and nudged his leg with her foot. "He misses us, even you."

Nico made a noncommittal sound and told the driver where to go. They still had to stop at the lawyer's. At least his own lawyer would be there and the one he'd hired to represent Juliette as well. He checked the time. "Are either of you hungry?"

"I'm not." Juliette was curled on her side on the seat. "I just want to sleep."

"Do you want to stretch out?" Dani asked, moving to the end of the seat as the girl did just that, and then Dani figured she should just move to the other seat. When she did, she found herself tucked against Nico's side almost immediately with his arm around her shoulder.

"God, I needed you here anyway." He whispered into her hair as he pulled her closer. He pressed desperate kisses to her ear and cheek.

Dani heard the emotion thick in his voice and she took his hand, intertwining their fingers. She didn't know what to say, so she didn't say anything. She didn't want to cry again, but she felt Nico's quiet sobs against her shoulders and couldn't help it. She wiped her eyes.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR 

Forty five minutes later they sat across from Gabrielle in a modern conference room of glass and stainless steel. Nico was thankful for the espresso and he lifted the cup to his lips with a look on his face akin to worship. Nothing would have pleased him more. Okay, maybe watching Gabrielle choke to death on her biscotti, but other than that there was little else.

Dani and Juliette were nursing their own cups, while Gabrielle glared at Nico. Dani noticed he ignored her, which only escalated the woman's hatred.

The will was read and Gabrielle would have screamed if the tall, thin lawyer beside her wouldn't have clamped a hand on her arm and spoke urgently in her ear almost constantly. At the end of the reading, Gabrielle's lawyers assured Nico's they would be contesting the will. After all, everyone knew Marshall Pittman had serious mental health issues. There was no way he could be leaving almost everything to his also mentally ill and addicted daughter, even if it was in a trust. And how could he possibly want that trust run by the man who had been sleeping with his wife for years. That made no sense.

Gabrielle glared. "Nico, you talked him into this didn't you?" She paced the side of the room. "I can't believe you'd do that to me."

He set his cup down and watched her move. "I had barely spoken to him Gabby. Though, I'd definitely want him to take care of Juliette over you." He paged through his copy of the will and pointed to a paragraph. "It hardly looks like he left you penniless. How much do you need?" He rubbed the back of his neck and then, after a pause, he pulled his phone from his pocket. He scrolled through a few screens and then slid the phone across the table. "Your personal portfolio is well into seven digits, that doesn't include your business portfolio or family money. So, what more do you want?"

She glanced at the screen and made an angry sound when she realized Nico had her actual financial data on his damn phone, "Fuck you and Marshall." She threw his phone back at him.

He caught it easily and gave her a cocky smile and mocking salute with two fingers, because it was exactly what Marshall would have done.

She growled. "How much I'm worth is not the point. It's how much he owes me for the past twenty one years of my life." She pointed at Juliette. "I gave birth to her and kept the brat out of trouble for him and he gives me what? A measly couple million?"

Dani about spit her coffee across the table. A couple million…hell, what she wouldn't do with a couple million dollars and here they were discussing it like it was a hundred dollar bill or something. She saw Nico's face go red and she understood why. To Gabrielle, Juliette was nothing more than a nuisance and Nico knew she didn't even do the job she claimed she had done well.

"Gabby, just shut your mouth right now about what a good mother you were." He leaned over the table. "My temper is hot, I'd love to do you serious bodily harm and you are on a very short leash right now."

Gabrielle's lawyer straightened. "Are you threatening my client Mr. Careles?"

He gave the woman a cold smile. "Not at all, I'm promising your client something I threatened her a long time ago."

Dani bit back her smile and took a bite of biscotti to give her mouth something to do.

Gabby waved the lawyer off. "Nico, you'll learn about her soon enough. It's all poor Juliette…poor little girl and next thing you know she's stealing shit right out from under you." She moved around the table and sat beside him. She leaned close. "She'll steal your money, your car, your drugs…" She tried to run her hand up his thigh under the table. "She stole my boyfriends. Oh, yes your innocent little Juliette was fucking and sucking my boyfriends Nico." She glared at the girl, not even caring that she was now sobbing, and then turned back to him with a wicked smile. "Oh, but don't worry Nico, trust me she's an equal opportunity whore. I found her head between my girlfriend's thighs once too." Now she looked to Dani and licked her lips. "So, you might want to keep an eye on her."

Dani gasped and Juliette pressed her eyes shut.

Nico had grabbed Gabby's wrist the instant it touched his thigh, but he didn't apply pressure until she implied Juliette was a slut. He used the tip of his thumb to press on just the right point along her wrist. He smiled cruelly when Gabrielle gasped suddenly, stiffened and leaned away from him. "That is e-goddamn-nough Gabrielle. What the hell is your problem? Are you so bitter? Do you really hate me or Marshall so much that you'll so easily hurt Juliette?" He twisted his hand, increasing the pressure and the delicate bones of her forearm strained. He could snap them if he wanted, and god he wanted to. "I could do it Gabby, don't tempt me. I don't even care who sees or how much it costs me." He said low so only she could hear. "Stop this shit right now. Just take what Marshall gave you and walk the fuck away."

Her eyes were on his and he watched her force fear from her face before she smiled. "You still like that do you? Enjoy people watching?" In a sudden show of bravado, she yanked her hand away from him. "Are you too old to remember that I like it rough?" She bent to whisper in his ear seductively. "You of all people should know it just gets me warmed up." She stood and walked back to the relative safety of the other side of the table rubbing her arm. "I say more power to you with Juliette. Less for me to worry about, but I still think Marshall owes me more than what he left me."

Nico gave her a cold look before he glanced to his lawyer and nodded.

Nico's lawyer cleared his throat and then spoke up. "Ms. Pittman, Mr. Careles would like me to rightfully point out that you and the deceased are legally divorced. He would also like me to remind you that the deceased begged you for reconciliation and you repeatedly refused and as such the estate is under no legal obligation to provide you anything beyond what is in the divorce agreement."

Gabrielle suddenly blanched and turned to her bitch of a lawyer. There was a bunch of chattering between them and then she looked deflated.

Nico smiled and sat back. "What? Oh, you didn't realize the divorce was actually final before Marshall was declared dead?" He pulled a piece of paper from a folder in front of him. "It was filed with the state well before he died Gabrielle." He held up the paper. "I have it right here if you'd like to see a copy, but I'm sure your lawyers could find you one."

"You son of a bitch."

"Yes, she was a bitch, no skin off my nose you reminding me about it." He looked to his lawyer and then to hers. "I think we're done here for now. I'd like to go home and relax because it's been one hell of a trying day." He waited for his lawyer to nod and then he stood. He held his hand out and helped Juliette stand. "Do you want to say anything sweetheart?" He held his hat in one hand and Juliette's arm in the other.

Juliette looked at her mother. "I loved dad and he loved you so much he couldn't see living his life away from you, but I don't want you in my life anymore. At least not right now..." She sobbed and pressed against Nico's side for a second then straightened with a deep breath. "If you have anything to tell me, use the lawyers." She looked to Dani and held out her hand. "When dad...god, when he killed himself, he killed our family. You're still my mother, but I can't look at you as family anymore." She wiped her eyes and lifted her chin. "Nico and Dani are my family now." She tugged Dani's hand and with her head held high and her lip trembling she left her stunned mother staring at her through the tinted glass of the conference room.

Dani let Juliette lead her from the room in quiet shock since she didn't know how to respond. Nico was her family, yes, but Dani? She'd only been in her life for the past few days. She helped her to the car as Nico brought up the rear.

"Juliette, I'm flattered, but…"

The girl shook her head. "Don't, you are. You've already done more for me than my own mother. You don't have to understand it, but it's true. Dad used to say family isn't always blood and Nico was his brother because he chose him to be. Well, I choose you to be part of my family. I want you in it. Older sister, aunt, I don't know, but you're some part of it, so don't fuck it up." She giggled and hugged Dani to her side. "Besides, if you're family that means I can tell Ray Jay he doesn't have a chance and not break his heart."

Dani laughed and rolled her eyes. "Ray Jay huh?"

"He tries too hard. He's a cute kid, but god, he needs to stop trying to be someone he isn't." She shook her head. "I was half high and he was still getting under my skin." She wiped her face and settled into her seat.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Dani stood in the bathroom of Nico's apartment with her suitcase open on the sink in front of her. She folded her dress and pulled a pair of jeans out. She bent to pull them on and was surprised when Nico came in. She jumped a bit and covered herself before laughing and dropping her hands.

He smiled. "I've seen every inch." He stepped closer, still in his dress blues. "Not that I mind seeing it all over again." He pressed a kiss to her shoulder. "Juliette wanted to change and she insisted that since we're already acquainted with each other…" he shrugged. "She had a point."

"It's fine." She rested a hand on his chest. "I didn't tell you how damn sexy you look in that uniform."

"I'll have to remember that." He winked. "Maybe I'll pull it one day for something special."

Dani blushed. "Go change." She pushed him toward his closet.

"Yes, ma'am." He pulled himself to attention and saluted, then announce, "Rear March", performed an about face and marched himself to the closet.

Dani giggled at him and slid her jeans on before digging a sapphire t-shirt from her case. She pulled her shirt on and fixed her hair in the mirror before zipping her bag closed just as Nico exited his closet.

He was wearing a pair of dark washed jeans that were well worn and obviously comfortable if the fraying along the bottom of the legs and the small holes in the pockets meant anything and his outfit was completed with a plain grey Henley. He was barefoot.

"Wow, I think that's the most laidback I've ever seen you."

He glanced down at his clothes. "Even naked?"

"Well, that doesn't count." She gave into her urge to press herself against him. "Mm, as cuddly as I thought you'd be."

He hugged her and then pulled her suitcase from his sink and carried it back to his living room.

Juliette was already curled up in his bed. She'd changed while they were changing as well. She was in a pair of yoga pants and a cami. She was sitting against the headboard. "I was hoping you two weren't getting freaky in there." She snarked at them and winked.

Dani held up her hands. "No, he was a perfect gentleman, even changed in his own closet."

"Only because you knew I was out here." She yawned. "I'm gonna nap."

Nico kissed the top of her head. "You deserve it. If you need us, we'll be right here."

She nodded and snuggled into his pillows. "You miss your bed yet?"

He shrugged. "You'd be surprised how little I sleep there anyway." Truthfully he did miss it, a hell of a lot. He missed his home, but he wasn't going to tell her that. "Get some rest."

He pulled the door most of the way closed and then put Dani's suitcase down by the stairs. He sank onto the couch. "Talk to me Dani."

She watched him and slipped into the kitchen to grab a glass of water. "You want something?"

He shook his head.

She poured a glass from the pitcher in the fridge and saw the leftovers from the day before. She was hungry. She fixed a plate and put it in the microwave and then grabbed two forks.

She carried her food and water to the living room and set the glass on a coaster and sat facing Nico with the plate between them. She handed him a fork, her eyebrow raised. "I hear the paella is like an orgasm and chocolate mixed with drugs all at the same time in your mouth." She tried not to smile.

His lips quirked up and he took the fork. He speared a shrimp and some rice and then ate watching her as he did. "How'd you know I was hungry?"

She shrugged. "I had no idea. I was hungry and figured I'd share." She picked up a piece of lobster with her fingers and held it to his lips.

He watched her face and used his tongue to take the meat.

She inhaled and then licked her fingers off. "It got hot in here."

He smiled, "No, you made it hot in here." He brushed her bottom lip with his thumb. "We should focus on the food.

She nodded. "Yeah." She was looking at his lips. "We really should."

Something bumped the plate she was holding, startling her and clattering the fork she had resting on it.

Nico chuckled and pulled the cat under the plate to his chest. "He thinks you're holding the plate for him." He rubbed his head and then under his chin. He nuzzled the cat with his cheek and set him on the back of the couch. "Go away Onyx."

The cat blinked at him and completely ignoring the command stretched out to his full length on the back of the couch his tail twitching against Nico's shoulder as he stared at Dani.

Dani laughed. "Well, you may be able to control everyone else, but the cat pretty much does whatever he wants." She picked her fork back up and resumed eating.

"Unfortunately," He gave the cat a playful glare and rubbed his nose before also returning to the plate with his fork in hand. "We have an agreement. He doesn't listen and I never really ask him to do anything he can't safely ignore."

"Very convenient."

"I think so." He smiled and then reached for her water glass. He took a sip, held it to her and after she drank, he set it back down. "I guess I did want something."

"It's good my mother taught me to share." She leaned in and kissed him playfully, but Nico's hand slipped to the back of her neck and held her there as he deepened the kiss. She pulled back a few long seconds later with a soft gasp. "Mm, like I said."

Nico took the mostly empty plate from her and set it on the table beside her glass. He slid closer to her and lay down on his side, pulling her with him so they were both on their sides facing each other. He smiled at her as he tucked a pillow under their heads. "I feel like a teenager on my grandparent's couch about to make out with my girlfriend."

Dani laid a hand on his cheek. "Grandparents?"

"My father wasn't around much and mom, well she had a different man in and out all the time. None of them were good, some of them were horrible. I told you once my mom wasn't like you Dani." He brushed her hair out of her face and shook his head. His face clouded over with something dark. "It doesn't matter anymore. My grandparents took me in after some trouble, so yea, my grandparents."

He'd shared more than he usually did. "Thank you for telling me, for letting me in." She moved and kissed him gently. "I wish I could have done more for you and Juliette today Nico. I hated how much pain you were both in." She bit her lip. "I'm so sorry, you're still hurting."

"My god Dani, how do you not realize how much you did and even now, you're still doing?" He sat up and pulled her with him. He shoved a frustrated hand through his hair. He stood and started pacing. "You have me turned inside out Danielle." He paused and looked at her. "In ways I didn't think were still possible." He pointed upstairs. "If only listening to Marshall's stupid advice would work." He paced again and then looked back to the confused woman on his couch. "Do you know what he told me?"

Dani shook her head.

"Drink an entire bottle of scotch, a really expensive one, and fuck that sexy therapist, wake up and move on…." He looked at Dani as if she should understand. "It won't work Dani. I mean, making love to you won't get you out of my system." He stopped and moved to stand in front of her. He sat on the coffee table and took her hands. "The only thing going to bed with you has done is made me realize I can't live without you."

"Wha…" she swallowed and cleared her throat, "What?"

"Being with you Dani, you've become a habit. Something I find I need and crave, something I can't live without, or maybe I can, but I don't want to. I miss you when you aren't here. I physically miss you, yes, but there's a part of me inside that misses you too." He searched her face. "I know you feel the same thing. You're just afraid to admit to yourself that you might feel something for me."

She stared at him and shook her head. "Do you read minds now?" She laughed nervously.

He smiled at her. "I wish because I'd really love to know what's going on in your head."

"Ha, that's a rich statement from you, Mr. Secret himself." She pulled her hands from his and wrapped her arms around herself. She shook her head. "Everything this week, hell this month has been so intense." She looked down at her lap for a second and then back at him. "My emotional state is all fucked to hell between me and Matt breaking up and then finding out about Marshall bugging my office and then then Ray Jay." She shook her head and rubbed her forehead, fighting a headache and tears. "Hell, think about it Nico, I barely know if I'm coming or going, so I don't know how you can even be functioning right now between Marshall, Gabrielle and Juliette. Throw in what's going on between us and you have a perfect storm."

She took a deep breath. "So please, if you are trying to tell me you that you love me, wait…wait until I know it's not because you want something good in the middle of this hell. Wait so I know I'm not feeling something back because I want to fix you." She gave him a sad smile. "And because I want to fix myself." She shrugged. "I want to Nico, I do. God, you don't know how much, but I want to be sure." She hugged herself tighter now and rubbed her arms as if she was cold.

He blinked and sat back. He was quiet as he watched her face. He saw the fear in her eyes and read it in her defensive posture. He knew no matter what he said, she wouldn't believe him. He sighed, she wasn't open to hearing him right now and even though he knew what he felt was real, he'd wait and give her time. He couldn't risk losing her.

He reached for her hand and she let him take it. He had the overwhelming need to connect with her and he was pretty sure he knew how to do it. "Dani, what's the one thing you want to know about me right now?"

She cocked her head and pulled her eyebrows together in confusion. "I...what?..."

He tried not to smile, he loved the total look of loss on her face. He'd thrown her. He shifted on the couch and settled against the arm, pulling her so her back rested against his chest. He bent a knee along the back of the couch and wrapped an arm around her waist. "I won't avoid your question Dani, I promise. I'll give you an honest answer no matter what."

She glanced up over her shoulder. "Why?"

"Because you deserve it. You've been there for me and for Juliette and you've asked me for nothing, expected nothing and I've given you even less than that." He kissed her temple. "And I know it's probably the one thing you crave more than anything else...to know me, to understand who I am and how I became the man I am today."

Dani nodded and reached back to touch his jaw. "You fascinate me, and I want to know what makes you tick."

He put his hand over hers with a sigh. "I know, but you'll only find out I'm boring and not nearly so mysterious."

She chuckled. "You could never bore me." She did shift and look at him. She smirked and put her hand to his forehead. "Are you running a fever, delusional, is there a pod in the parking garage somewhere?"

"Cute," he bent close and kissed her ear, "I can always change my mind...I still owe you a spanking."

"Now who's being cute?" She couldn't hide the shiver his words caused and she had no way to explain the sudden heat between her legs. She ignored it and wet her lips with the tip of her tongue. "Okay, so you went to your grandparents, how old were you and why?"

He sighed and stood. "That's a long story." He moved to the kitchen and opened the fridge. He pulled two bottles from inside and then removed the tops with the opener from the drawer. He returned and handed Dani a bottle of the local microbrew. "Here, I know I need one."

"Thanks." She sipped and then sat back waiting for him to start.

He settled beside her, close enough to touch her when he wanted. In fact, his arm was draped along the sofa back idly playing with the hair on her shoulder as he held his beer in his other hand. "I told you, my mother was not a good mother and my dad well, maybe he tried to be but he wasn't. My mom had men in her life some of them were actually okay, but it always seemed those were the ones, like my dad, that never stuck around." He took a drink.

Dani nodded. "Okay."

"By the time I was twelve, mom was partying pretty hard. Different guys, different drugs...it was me and my two little sisters sometimes alone for days in an apartment with no food and no money."

Dani interrupted. "You never mentioned sisters."

He smiled. "You never asked, Dani. Anyway, sometimes we'd just go without food until Monday, but sometimes we we'd be so hungry...god, I hated that." He shoved a hand through his hair. "It wasn't so bad for me, but Carly and Ana, Ana was the youngest and she'd cry...god I could never stand to see her cry, and then I'd have to do something."

He paused for a drink and looked at Dani. She was watching him intently. "I'd steal if I could. A candy bar, a box of cereal or a loaf of bread it really didn't matter. If we three kids could eat it and I could lift it without being caught I'd take it. Sometimes, I'd just sneak into the neighbors' apartments or houses and grab some cans of soup or whatever." He shrugged. "If Mrs. Spanelli was home, I went there. She had boys, so I'd hang out with Frankie and Mikey. I didn't tell her we were alone but she knew when I'd show up at dinner time and eat like a horse. Sometimes she'd send me back home for the girls and if she didn't, she'd send me home with food for them and when she could, even extra food for the next day. It depended on whether her husband was around or not."

Dani took his hand. "She sounded sweet."

Nico looked at her. "She was my lifeline for a longtime Dani. She kept me, Ana and Carly safe from the worst of my mother's boyfriend, she fed us, she gave me a place to stay when I needed it, even after..." he stopped and cleared his throat. "A few things happened. My mother got in over her head with one guy when I was fifteen. Her life really became about the Jason and drugs. She needed money all the time. Eventually, Carly and Ana went to live with their grandmother."

Dani interrupted. "Their grandmother?"

Nico nodded. "Yea, we had different fathers and social services stepped in a couple times around then and since she had accepted them for temporary placement once, mom was happy to let her keep them." He shrugged, "She wasn't interested in me. I wasn't blood and well, I didn't quite fit into her white washed neighborhood."

Dani frowned and took a drink before setting her beer on the table and moving closer. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay." He pulled her against his chest and continued. "Jason was abusive all the time. When I could, I stayed with Mikey and Frankie, but if Jason got ahold of me he'd force me to steal things they could sell for drug money and if I refused, he'd beat the hell out of me or worse..." He took a long drink and set his empty bottle on the table. "Several times I spent days or weeks in detention centers after I got caught shoplifting or picked up from a mugging because my mother was too high to come get me out or because she didn't want to pay to bail me out."

Dani sat up and looked at him. "Nico, you can stop." She wiped her eyes.

He shook his head. "No, you wanted to know Dani. I'm going to finish now." He reached for her unfinished beer and drank half of what she had left. "When I was fifteen Jason beat me pretty bad and told me he would kill me if I didn't get him at least two grand. He told me he would kill Ana too." He wiped his face and finished the beer. "Mom stood right there. I looked at her, blood running from my broken nose, ribs broken, I'm pretty sure he broke my arm too, and I asked her if she was going to let him do that and she told me she had to because she needed the drugs so I better just do what he said."

"Oh my god." Dani put a hand over her mouth. She'd heard enough stories like this from other clients, but not from someone she cared for so much. "You didn't deserve to be hit. Someone should have protected you."

Nico nodded. "I had no idea how to get that much money in one night. I was usually lucky to get him a couple hundred bucks, ripping off cheap watches, breaking into houses or picking pockets. I left the house and much later decided to steal an expensive car. I'd stolen cars before, but usually not after drinking to dull the pain, which I found out was not a good idea for a fifteen year old, who really didn't have much experience driving to begin with."

"Please tell me you didn't hurt someone else." She hoped, but she already knew inside that something bad was going to happen.

He looked up at her and shook his head. "I can't Dani, I wish I could, but I can't…I drove that car around a corner doing fifty and rolled it. There were two kids walking a dog, they were my friends. One of them managed to get out of the way, the other was pinned under the car. I didn't stand around to find any of this out. I climbed out of the car and stumbled away, but someone saw me."

"Nico, what happened?"

"It was Mikey Dani, Mikey was under the car and he lost both his legs because of me. Hell, Mrs. Spanelli was the one who saw and she didn't even call the cops on me. In fact, after she knew Mikey was stable, even though she knew he lost his legs, she was talking to the police and told them she remembered seeing another kid at the accident. Said I had gotten side swiped by the car, got knocked down and got up bloody and dazed. The cops came looking for me that night. They found me, passed out and bloody in an alley and I thought they were going to arrest me. Instead, they called an ambulance and brought me to the hospital. When they told me what she'd told them; that the car hit me too and some drunk was driving and he stumbled away, I started crying. I was hurt so bad between the accident and Jason's beating no one questioned it. Of course they believed her, why would she lie?" Nico was crying now, not sobbing, just unshed tears in his eyes.

Dani pulled his head to her chest and held him. "Shh, that's enough. I don't want to hear anymore." Dani wasn't sure she could handle anymore. There were tears on her cheeks.

Nico pulled back and wiped his eyes. "Dammit Dani, it doesn't work that way." He stood and picked up the beer bottles. He walked to the kitchen and yanked open the cabinet under the island where the recycling bin was. He tossed the bottles into the bin and slammed the door closed. He turned back toward the living room. "You can't just poke at memories, and then as soon as you hear something dark, back out of it." He shoved a hand through his hair. "This story has an end and you're going to get it and you'll be thankful that this one has a good ending and not a bad one." He was back by the couch in a few long strides.

He reached down, pulled her up into his arms and crushed his lips to hers. He was frustrated. He hadn't wanted to tell her this, he hadn't wanted to reveal so much about his past, but here he was talking about himself and things that were better left in the past. His hands tangled in her hair as his tongue battled with hers. The kiss was just short of violent and it was how he felt. He pulled back with his hands still gripping her head as he panted and looked at her. "I'm sorry."

She stared at him stunned and shook her head stiffly since she had little control at the moment. "Don't be." Her voice was barely a whisper. Her hands, as if she suddenly realized they could move, found their way to his shoulders. "I should apologize." She pressed against him. "You're right on both counts. I shouldn't expect you to tell me anything and I shouldn't ask you to stop."

He frowned and sat, pulling her down with him so she was on his lap. "Dani, you shouldn't have to pull every bit of information out of me like it's an interrogation if we're going to be in a relationship, and I want a relationship with you. That's what started this whole thing." He sighed. "But, I want you to understand, there's a reason I don't talk about my past."

Her eyes searched his. "I'm so sorry. I mean, I do want to know who you are because you know everything there is about me Nico and I know so little about you."

He shook his head. "You know me Dani. You've seen my home, that's like seeing into my soul. Juliette even told you, I don't entertain here. This is my sanctuary. I come here to be alone. In fact, I rarely even do business here."

She swallowed and was surprised by the prickle of tears in her eyes. "But, you brought me here."

He smiled. "You and Juliette are the only two women with open invitations."

"Gabrielle?"

He frowned. "She has never been here and as far as I know she doesn't even have the address, but I'm sure she could track me down if she tried hard enough, though I'm not listed. I use the business address for correspondence and deliveries or occasionally, the hotel. Marshall had been here and had the address." He smiled. "He would actually have mail sent here by courier and delivered to the doorman."

Dani figured they'd both had enough of a breather and she knew he wanted to finish his story, she took a breath. "Okay, so you need to finish your story."

"I do." He nodded. "Mikey was bad Dani. Like I said, the car crushed his legs. He was my age, about six months younger, so not quite fifteen yet and he just lost his legs." He wiped his forehead. "Only Mrs. Spanelli saw me and at that time, I didn't know that. I wasn't sure if Frankie saw or not. Anyway, I'm there in the hospital bed with a now confirmed broken radius, four broken ribs, punctured lung, broken nose, fractured orbit and concussion and Frankie walks in. He's a big thick kid, tough. He's been crying. I'm not a little kid at my age, but I'm on the thin side, a bit wiry but tough, but Frankie can take me on a good day." He chuckles and shakes his head. "And that day was not a good day, and I'm afraid he's going to hurt me because I ran over his brother. Dani I was so afraid, I almost pissed the bed, but this kid looks at me and then hugs me." He groans. "Oh, my god it hurt so much, he almost killed me and then I did it… I actually pissed the bed. It hurt so damn much, I couldn't help it." He started laughing.

Dani giggled. "You're kidding right?"

He shook his head. "Nope." He held up a hand. "I'm dead serious. There's this seventeen year old linebacker bear hugging me, the kid with a broken arm and broken ribs, punctured lung, hooked up to all this equipment in ICU and he literally squeezes the piss out of me. Well every alarm starts sounding and a million people run in thinking I'm dying, and I about feel like it by then, and they pull him off me and when I can finally breath again he's still standing there and he smiles and says, 'Mikey's gonna make it and you're okay too.' I started crying then, I was pretty hysterical and they knocked my ass out. The next time I came to, Mrs. Spanelli was sitting beside my bed."

"Uh-Oh."

"Well, my exact thoughts were more like, 'Oh, shit', but close enough." He shifted on the couch and slid and arm behind her shoulders. "I just looked up at her and started crying. I was afraid and ashamed. I just kept saying I was sorry over and over again. Then she did the most amazing thing ever Dani." He was looking across the room, gazing at the wall hanging.

"She said, 'Nicholas it's okay, Michael is alive and you are alive and I forgive you', and then she kissed me on the forehead and told me she sent her husband to our apartment to find out where my dad lived and he called him, but he'd been told my dad was dead and had been about six months, but they'd given him the number of his parents. So, Mrs. Spanelli had called them. They were on their way to the hospital. I'd never met my grandparents Dani." He looked at her then. He was exhausted. "Hell I didn't even know I had grandparents; they were like fairy godparents to me. Only good boys and girls had them and I didn't really qualify as good."

"They must have known about you."

He nodded and wiped a hand over his face. "Yea, but they'd lost track of my father and mom. They'd actually seen me when I was a baby several times. We weren't very far from them really, probably only fifteen miles, but mom moved a lot and changed her name." He shrugged. "Dad didn't keep in touch, so…anyway, when they got there Mrs. Spanelli told them what really happened and explained to them why I needed to get away from my mother and her boyfriend. She knew if I didn't I was going to end up dead or in prison. She was right, I would have. I wasn't innocent Dani, don't think I was up until this point, but I didn't hurt people. I picked pockets and mugged people without hurting them. I broke into houses, I crashed and grabbed and boosted cars on occasion, among other things… but eventually it would escalate. It always does."

Dani took his hand and laced her fingers with his. "Tell me about them." She kissed the top of his hand as she watched his face. She saw emotions flicker through his eyes and his jaw tighten. "What did you think when you met them?"

"Well, I was pretty much terrified. I didn't know these people, but I was willing to get away from the situation I was in. It couldn't be worse than where I was. Even the worst foster home I was sent to wasn't worse than Jason." He closed his eyes tight and shivered at some memory. "I could fight off most of the boys my age and even most of the older men. Group foster homes were easy enough to stay safe in. If you got in enough fights, you got locked up alone or you became the alpha in the house and were left alone." He rolled his neck on shoulders. "Jason was vicious and he knew my routines. I was never safe for long at home and I never slept sound for fear he'd show up in room in the middle of the night to beat me or worse..."

Dani gasped.

Nico looked over to her as his eyes clouded with memories. "I fought him and the others off all the time Dani. There is so much in my past you really don't want to know about." He sighed. "Carly and Ana were safe because of me. Jason never touched them. I made sure of that, but once they were out of the house I started fighting back more and that's when I started getting hurt." A tear ran down his cheek and he wiped it away with the back of his free hand.

Dani had been crying, but she couldn't stop the small sob that caught in her throat. Right now the man beside her looked like the boy from all those years ago. Scared, broken and yet brave and defiant. She watched him lift his chin even as his lip trembled. She shook her head. "I don't know how you survived. Most people who go through half of what you just told me don't end up where you are Nico."

He smirked. "I'm sure you'll find some diagnosis to give me. I'm sure PTSD symptoms still persist either from my childhood or my military service, probably both." He sighed. "It doesn't matter. I did what I had to do to survive. We never know what we're capable of until we learn we are. Unexpected people teach us things Dani and laying in that hospital bed staring up at Mrs. Spanelli I learned something. I learned how to be powerful."

She pulled her eyebrows together. "I don't follow."

"I didn't really get it then, but I was in awe of her at the time. I told you she forgave me and she did. She honestly doesn't hold it against me that I took her son's legs. In fact, she never told Mike or Frank that it was me. No one else knows and she has never once brought it back up to me or made me feel guilty for it. The Chinese philosopher, Lao Tzu says, 'He who controls others may be powerful, but he who has mastered himself is mightier still' and Oskar Schindler stated even more simpler 'Power is when you have every justification to kill someone, and then you don't'. Mrs. Spanelli has every right to hurt me, or take my life. I took something from her, something very precious. Imagine if Tyler Harper had hurt Ray Jay or Lindsay Dani. What if he had taken Ray Jay's legs?" He paused and let it sink in. "Would you want to hurt him? Would you want me to go over there and break his legs?"

Dani held up a hand. "Wait, that's different."

He nodded. "I know Dani. I just wanted you to think about it. If your child is hurt, how it feels and how you want justice. I deserved to be punished and she had every right to have them send me away until I was eighteen, but she didn't. She had that power to kill my spirit, my hope, my future and instead she gave me everything I have now."

"I…so," she swallowed, "She gave you to your grandparents. Were you happy there? How were they?"

Nico's face broke into a genuine smile. "My grandfather looked like I remember my dad looking, but older. He looked a lot like me, but grayer." He touched his hair. "Not quite as tall and his skin was darker than mine. He had a spark in his eye and a quiet strength about him that made you listen to him. He barely had to raise his voice. People just paid attention to him when he spoke." He paused and his smile warmed even more. "My grandmother, well she was beautiful. She had the best smile Dani, but you didn't dare make her angry because she kept a wooden spoon handy and she wasn't shy about using it." He winked, "Even on my grandfather."

"You sound like you were happy there."

He nodded. "It wasn't easy, especially at first. I wasn't used to discipline. They had rules and expected them followed, but I was safe. I was allowed to lock my door and the bathroom door. I had new clean clothes. I had all I could eat. It took me about two months to stop moving my bed in front of the door and sleeping with the old Bowie knife Pop gave me, but they didn't say anything. Pop didn't even say a word when he spooked me the third day I was there and a turned and tried to punch him, but he did teach me how he had me on my back staring up at him before my punch even had a chance to land. In fact he taught me how to defend myself pretty well. It was probably one of the reasons I was able to stop moving my bed."

He started loosening up and relaxing again. "As far as rules, well I had to actually go to school. I found out I was good at it and pretty soon was pulling down a 3.8 and I had a curfew, I had to help around the house with chores, do my laundry and clean my room. Pop was a retired Naval CPO, that's a drill instructor or Chief Petty Officer, but as a civilian he was a grounds keeper and gardener, so by default so was I on the weekends and in the summer." Nico turned his hands over and rubbed at thick callouses on his palms. "These started that year and I've had them ever since." He ran his hands over the sensitive skin on the inside of Dani's arm and let the rough skin tease her. "I've found they have their uses." He kissed her cheek when she shivered.

"So, you joined the Navy because your grandfather was in the Navy?" She took his hand and ran her finger over the callouses. She watched his face and he nodded and turned to look at her.

"That was part of it, but not all of it Dani." He leaned back into the couch and let out a deep breath. "That's another story though and one I really don't want to get into right now." His eyes were on her's and he willed her not to press the issue. "Can we save that one for another time?"

"I think I've heard enough of your secrets for today." She shifted and straddled his hips facing him and settled onto his lap, happy when his hands rested on her hips. She leaned over him, his head on the back of the couch looking up at her, and she smiled down at him. "Thank you." She caught his lips, as her hands framed his face. Her lips moved over his soft and sweet and then her tongue traced along the seam of his lips until he opened and let her in. She was surprised that he didn't try to take control like he usually did, but let her explore. She nipped at his lower lip and he gripped her hips a bit more firmly in warning, which she ignored. Her tongue played over his until it agreed to play back and she bit at his lip again.

This time Nico growled and his hands shifted up to her neck to hold her head still as he took control. He pulled back and looked her in the eye. "I warned you Dani." He pressed a kiss to her jaw and bit the sensitive curve sharply before soothing it and then when she gasped he attacked her mouth again. He kept the sensation changing. He teased her breast, nipped her ear, softened the kiss and then drove her crazy again with another intense deep one."

"You guys can have the bedroom if you need it."

Juliette's coolly amused voice startled them apart.

She stood in the kitchen behind the refrigerator door. Obviously she had walked past them when she had spoken. She shut the door and set the bottle of pomegranate juice on the counter with a smile, "Don't stop on my account. Nothing I haven't seen before, trust me." She smirked at them as she pulled a glass out and then poured her juice. "You want some? No?" She put the juice back and then moved into the living room and slumped into the chair across from them.

Dani pushed her hair from her red face and then realizing she was still straddling Nico's lap she started to move.

He grabbed her. "Hang on a minute will you." He whispered urgently in her ear.

"Wha…" He shifted under her and then she realized what he meant. "Oh…"She tried not to laugh, but couldn't. "Sorry."

Juliette had obviously already caught on because a pillow from the chair sailed across at them. "Oh my god you two are worse than obvious."

Nico glared at her, picked up the pillow and considered throwing back at her head. Fortunately, his situation had resolved itself. He tossed the pillow to the end of the couch. "You could have announced yourself sooner Juliette."

Dani moved from his lap and made sure her clothes were properly in place. "My god, that is embarrassing."

"Chill, it's fine. You both have your clothes on, what's the big deal?" She drank her juice and watched them with a silly smirk on her face. "Though, you're kind of hot together." She sipped. "You ever thought about porn? I mean I bet you guys could make some good cash. Dani especially."

Nico glared. "Juliette." The way he said her name was all it took.

She stopped and looked at him. "Okay. I'll stop and I'm sorry, you too Dani."

"I won't be doing any porn; ever. And it's okay as long as you were kidding."

She nodded. "I was teasing." She stuck her tongue out at Nico.

Onyx jumped onto Juliette's lap at that time.

"How about attacking her Onyx, defend my honor." Nico ordered the cat.

Onyx stuck his tail in the air, turned in a circle and settled down in a ball on her lap, purring so loudly they could hear him on the couch.

Dani laughed. "I hope your honor isn't dependent on your cat."

Juliette stroked the finicky ball of fur and lowered her head to her lap as if listening to it. She lifted her head and nodded. "Onyx says he would have defended your honor if he still had the balls to do it."

Nico laughed at that. "Sounds like a man. Blame it on the lack of cojones, which of course is my fault you little bastard."

It was quiet for a few minutes and then Dani cleared her throat. "I was talking to Corinne at the funeral today."

Nico nodded. "And?"

She looked at Juliette. "Well, she agreed to taking Juliette into her program. She'll let her continue on the methadone detox as an inpatient and we even discussed weekend furloughs for Juliette because I think she needs to be with you as well." Dani looked from Nico to Juliette trying to gauge reactions. Neither of them expressed much. "I agreed to oversee her on the weekends, but I'm getting too close to her to be her main therapist Nico." She looked to him. "I'm already too close to you." She took his hand. "What do you think?"

He squeezed Dani's hand and looked to Juliette. "What do you think Juliette?"

She looked shocked that he'd ask. "You want my opinion? You aren't just going to tell me how it's going to be?"

He sat forward with a puzzled look on his face. "What good is that going to do? I want you well. Sure I could lock you into the place, but I didn't do that last time did I?"

Again, she looked a bit stunned, like she didn't think of that. Like dealing with Nico was foreign to her. She shook her head. "No…no, you didn't. You dropped me off and I could have ditched. You let me make the choice." She ran her hand over the cat's fur thoughtfully. "Mom and dad never let me make a choice about treatment. They picked the doctor, the treatment, hell, even my roommate sometimes." She shrugged and wiped her eyes before looked up at Dani and then Nico. "Do you think this is what I should do? I mean, Corinne seems nice and TK, okay he's nuts, but he seems clean."

"If Dani thinks this is what you should do, then I agree with her. She knows what she's doing and TK, he's annoying and crazy, but when he's sober Dani's actually managed to turn him into a pretty decent man." Nico glanced at Dani out of the corner of his eye and saw her smile. "I'd be happy to have you around on the weekends by the way…" One eyebrow rose and then he added, "…with some ground rules."

Juliette bit her lip and pet the cat absently. "I want to get clean and I trust Dani, especially if you trust her." She looked at Nico. "So yea, when am I going in then?"

Dani exhaled the breath she didn't even know she was holding. She smiled. "Monday, if you want to go meet everyone Saturday I can drive you up and we can do your intake then, or we can wait until Monday. It's up to you."

Juliette shrugged. "Let me think about it." She looked at Nico. "How are we going to do this living arrangement though? We can't keep up this bullshit with you sleeping somewhere else, but then if Dani's sleeping over that's gonna be awkward." She snorted and waved her hand around. "This place isn't set up for roommates with sleep over guests."

"Did you stay here before?" Dani asked. "And the sleeping over isn't the problem, but you need to be supervised all the time." She looked to Nico.

Nico answered. "Yes, she's crashed on my couch several times and I sleep in sweats or shorts when she's over." He gave her a knowing look. "I just keep the bedroom door open for access to the bathroom."

"Damn." Juliette snorted, "That means you usually don't sleep in shorts." She rolled her eyes. "That's just TMI."

Dani had an idea. She was sure it violated every boundary she had had and more ethical rules than she could think of, but it solved several problems. She took a deep breath. "You both could stay at my place on the weekends." She held up her hand. "Nico, you could use my consultation room, the couch pulls out. It has its own half bath and entrance and the door locks on that side to separate it from the other side of the house so you'd have privacy if you needed it. Juliette, you could use the guest room. Of course, you'd both have access to the entire house. The kids are with Ray every other weekend so it would only be us in the house on those weekends."

Nico watched the blush rise on Dani's face when she mentioned her kid free weekends.

Juliette noticed too because she laughed. "Are you suggesting Nico move upstairs those weekends Dani?" She winked and then laughed when Nico started chuckling.

"I think she just might be Juliette and I think I just may take her up on that offer." He leaned over and kissed her cheek. He knew she was offering him a lot. He whispered against her ear. "Thank you Dani."


	14. Breathe You In

**_NOTE:_** Update a bit later than usual, but it's here, of course it's a tad longer than usual as well which is probably why it took me longer to edit. That of course does not mean there are no errors. I am a horrible self editor. The third read through is basically a joke. I miss way too much, though I'll catch it if I read it on the site. Something about seeing it in a different format. I should do that myself, I know...I've done beta work before I know how to do it. I'm just lazy. _  
_

I hope you all are still reading and enjoying. Long stories sometimes become a chore, lose steam and all. I hate that. This story does have a resolution, I promise. I mean, it's not an ever ending path...it's not a complete THE END, but the story line does complete itself. Thanks for the reviews, reads, follows and faves.

Thanks for those of you who read the **Shades** story as well...I'll consider more on that one. As you'll see that storyline and this are blurring, so if you haven't read that story, you may want to.

* * *

**Breathe You In**

Saturday morning Dani was making breakfast while Ray Jay read about the Harper's house being raided by the State Police.

"Mom, did you see this?" He pointed to the article while she tried to shoo him away from the splatter of bacon grease. "It's like unbelievable. Seriously, did you know about this? Tyler, Mason and his father all of them were arrested for child porn and forced prostitution." He looked up at her like a kid on Christmas morning. "I mean that's crazy, right?"

"Yes Ray Jay and it's horrible what they did to those kids and I knew about some of it yes because Nico got a heads up about it." She pulled the bacon from the pan. "Go tell your sister breakfast is ready. We need to talk."

He looked at her, suddenly worried. "Are you okay? What's wrong?"

"I'm fine." She pulled the pancakes from the oven and set them on the counter with the bacon. "Just get your sister so we can eat."

He went to the bottom of the stairs and screamed. "Linds…say….Break….faasstt."

Dani rolled her eyes and when he returned to the counter she slapped his shoulder lightly. "I could have done that myself Ray Jay."

"So, why'd you ask me then?" He shrugged and folded the paper to the sports section.

Lindsay came down the stairs a few seconds later. "So, what's up?" She pulled a piece of bacon from the plate and ate it as she poured a glass of orange juice.

Dani laid out three plates and waited for the kids to pile theirs before she took what she wanted. She was nervous. She needed to discuss Juliette and Nico with them. She put a couple of the lemon ricotta pancakes on her plate. The bacon was mostly gone already, proving that Ray Jay was definitely over his vegan phase. "So, what did you guys think of Juliette the other night?"

Lindsay put down her fork. "She's so sad mom. I feel so bad for her." She looked at Ray Jay. "Is she doing okay?"

Dani nodded. "She's holding up. She has a lot of work to do." She glanced at Ray Jay. "She's had some problems with drugs. In fact, Mason's the one that got her hooked on heroin and she's going to go into treatment where TK is with Corrine."

"Damn." Ray Jay pushed his plate away and frowned and then his face suddenly went pale. "Was she…did she…shit, mom…?"

Dani bit her lip. "Oh Ray Jay, I don't know." She hugged him, of course she did know the answer to that, but the answer wasn't hers to give. She pulled back and looked at both of the kids. "I do know she needs a lot of help. She just buried her dad and her mother basically disowned her. All she has now is Nico."

Lindsay shook her head. "And you. She has you mom and us." She waved her hand between herself and Ray Jay. "We like her and we can help her."

Dani smiled and took Lindsay's hand. "You already did Linds. You helped her say goodbye to her father and that meant so much to her by the way. That was so amazing." She had to wipe her eyes. "There's something I need to ask you guys though."

They both looked at her expectantly.

She took a breath. "On the weekends Juliette will be coming home from rehab to be with Nico, but she needs someone with her all the time. Nico's job includes weekends, and his apartment is a problem too. You guys were there. It's… "

Ray Jay cleared his throat. "What about here?"

Dani tried not to smile.

Lindsay nodded. "Yea, I mean we have room right?" She looked at Ray Jay. "Juliette could share my room and Nico could have the guest room."

Dani nodded. "Hmm, that could work. What about my consultation room? The sofa opens up, you know grandma's used it before and that way Nico could have his privacy."

"That might work better." Ray Jay agreed. "Then Juliette could have her own room."

Of course he didn't mention that it would be closer to his room, which was what Dani was thinking, but she wasn't too worried about that. "So, you two are okay with this?"

They looked at each other.

Lindsay shrugged. "Why not? I like her and she seems like she needs our help and Nico, well he's cool."

"Dude, Nico's kick ass and Juliette," He smiled. "There's not much to say other than…wow."

"Ray Jay," Dani sighed, "first, she's basically a patient, so she's off limits. Second, she's quite a bit older. Third, think of her as Nico's daughter." Her eyebrow rose and she waited for that to sink in.

"Oh…oh…hell no." He pushed away from the counter. "Yea, okay I see your point." He pulled his phone from his pocket and started scrolling through it.

"What are you doing?" Dani asked. She hadn't heard it ring or buzz.

"Hyphenating Juliette's name in my contact list." He looked up. "She gave me her number…Pittman-CARELES." He looked up with a smile. "Okay, now a constant reminder."

"If I hadn't given birth to you, I'd wonder sometimes Ray Jay." She ruffled his hair and collected the breakfast dishes with a smile.

"What?" He put his phone in his pocket and pulled a pancake from the plate still on the counter. He stuffed it into his mouth and chewed. "I'm heading to the mall to pick up a present for grandma's birthday next week. You coming, Linds?"

"Crap." Dani looked up from the sink. "I totally forgot about that." It was Ray's mother's birthday and she probably should get her something. "Any chance you can get her something for me too? That woman never did like me and now she hates me."

Lindsay shook her head. "She doesn't hate you mom. She just, well…" she shrugged.

"Like I said Lindsay, she hates me." Dani grabbed her purse and pulled out some money. She handed over two twenties and a ten. "Just find something that says that exactly then."

"I'll try."

"Nico and Juliette are coming over for dinner tonight, you'll both be here right?" Dani asked as they headed to the door.

Lindsay nodded and went outside, but Ray Jay paused at the door. "Yea, what's for dinner by the way?"

Dani pulled open the freezer. "How about chicken parm?"

"Oh, hell yes then. You haven't made that since…I don't know, it's been a while." Dani couldn't see it, but he smiled and then stopped. "Mom, uh you usually only make that for special occasions, like really special. You know, anniversary, birthday…is there something going on between you and Nico?"

Dani kept the freezer door open. When the hell did Ray Jay, Ray Jay for heaven sake, become so damn perceptive? She'd expect it from Lindsay. "Uh, you're asking that because of chicken parm?"

The freezer door was suddenly gone and her son stood there. "Yes, because I remembered the last time you made it." He shut the door. "It was the night you first told us about you and Matt. Trust me, I remember my food mom, especially your chicken parm." He gave her a serious look.

She swallowed. "Ray Jay, we ah…" she knew she wasn't handling this well. "Look, things have been, screwed up recently and…"

Ray Jay's eyes went wide. "Wait a second, when I called from the police station he answered the phone. He wasn't here because he knew about me being in jail, he was here with you."

Dani put her hand on Ray Jay's arm, she wasn't sure if he was upset or not. "Ray Jay, I…he'd just found out about his best friend dying, he was hurting, he's my friend." She didn't know if he would understand. Hell, she didn't even understand.

He snorted. "Mom, you don't have to explain why you ended up in bed with him." He rolled his eyes. "Ugh and ick." He made an exaggerated shivering motion. "I really, really don't need to think about that… Remind me to bleach my brain." He closed his eyes and then opened them with a grimace. "I just need to know he won't hurt you." He looked at her. "He's different. I know he'd like kill people for you, but so would Tony Soprano and at the same time he's screwing some other chick half your age while he slaps her around."

Dani sighed and rubbed her forehead. "Ray Jay, please stop watching Netflix late at night." She hugged him. "And when did you grow up?" She kissed his cheek and let him go, but looked him in the eye. "Look, I'm a big girl and I'm being careful. I promise I won't get hurt and I know Nico looks scary, but I trust him more than I even trusted Matt." Her words actually shocked her.

"Okay, but I'm not saying anything to Lindsay yet." He headed back to the door and then pointed at her. "I'm still expecting that chicken parmesan though." Then he was gone.

Dani sank into the stool by the counter. "Huh…" She hadn't really thought about what she was saying when she told Ray Jay how much she trusted Nico, it had just come out of her mouth, but it was true. She just wasn't sure exactly what it meant.

She pulled the chicken from the freezer before she forgot and then sat down and opened her laptop. She needed to talk to Jeanette. There was so much to tell her.

She waited for Skype to connect and almost cried when she saw her.

"Gawd…I miss you sooo much!"

Jeanette frowned. "Dani, cut that out. These pregnancy hormones make me cry for no reason, so don't give me one."

Dani wiped her eyes and smiled. "You look so good. How do you feel?"

"Fat." She snorted. "Slow…like a sea turtle on land." He held up her hand. "I'm puffing up like a toad."

"Come on, you're glowing, look at you." Dani said and then stopped. "Wait…that's not a…Jeanette!"

Jeanette nodded. "It is…it is…"

"Oh my GOD!" Dani bounced in her seat. "REALLY?"

Jeanette smiled. "But not until after. I'm so not doing this while I'm fat and sea turtley." She giggled.

"How did he ask? Was it romantic?"

"Honestly Dani, it was the most unromantic proposal I've ever had, which is why it was the best."

"What?" Dani was used to hearing about picnics and hot air balloon rides, romantic dinners…you name it.

"Seriously, he comes home from work at like three in the morning every day and takes a shower. That day he did the same thing only he made something to eat, which he does sometimes if he's hungry. He brought it to bed with him that day and he'd made enough for two. He actually woke me up and I'll tell you Dani, it made me a bit grumpy." She frowned and then smiled wistfully. "But here's my sexy, naked Gusto and he's feeding me these delicious crepes and then he says to me in horrible English, "You make me happy so now make me your husband" and he opens the ring box." She smiled at Dani and wiped her eyes. "What could I say?"

Dani beamed at her. "YES!"

"Exactly!" Jeanette dissolved into a fit of laughter.

"So, how's the baby?"

"Good," she looked down and rubbed her belly, "getting bigger, making me fatter and daddy prouder. I swear the bigger my belly gets, the bigger Augusto's ego."

"Men, it's always about the size of something isn't it?"

Both women laughed.

Jeanette cleared her throat, "So, what's up with you and Matt, still not together?"

She shook her head. Dani hadn't talked to her in a while. "Oh-no."

"When you do that and say, 'Oh-no' that way, it usually means something, Dani." She pointed. "Spill woman, what happened?"

Dani took a deep breath. "No, no…no, except for a couple of times, no we are not together."

"Dani Santino, you dog you." Jeanette smiled and waved an exaggerated finger. "I'd drink to you if I could."

Dani shook her head. "It's been a while and they were total mistakes."

Jeanette chuckled, "But I bet they were hot mistakes Dani." She winked. "Anyone new on the horizon?"

Dani must have blushed or something because Jeanette didn't let her respond.

"Oh my god, Dani who? Who is it and already? You're as bad as me!" She was laughing now.

"I don't know what's going on with him, but it's something and it's something more than just sex…" She bit her lip. "And do you remember Nico?"

"You mean, tall, dark, sexy and mysterious? Hell yes. Who wouldn't? You and him, really?"

She nodded and smiled wide. Jeanette was right. He was all of those things and so much more. "Gawd Jeanette, he's…wow."

"Like wow, or," she did jazz hands, "WOW!"

Dani laughed and repeated the jazz hands and both women giggled again.

"Speaking of wow, that reminds me, I'm pretty sure I left a book in the guest room." Jeanette bit at her fingernail and raised an eyebrow.

Dani made a disgusted sound. "Yes, I found it. Thank you very much by the way."

She giggled. "What, you didn't enjoy it?"

"Seriously Jeanette, did you read that trash all the way through?"

"Maybe…come on, it's all in good fun Dani. Didn't it do anything for you?" She held up her finger thumb and index finger. "Even a little bit?"

Dani blushed, not because she read past page fifty in the book, but… She shook her head. "I fell asleep on page forty nine and threw the book away."

"Huh…well, you never were into that kind of stuff. I remember you hated it that one time Ray tied you up." She smiled. "I'm telling you Dani, you should reconsider…"

Dani glared. "I'm not reading the book, or the other two."

Jeanette huffed. "Fine. Spoil sport." There was noise and Jeanette yelled to someone off camera. Then she turned to Dani. "Gusto says,'Hola y adios', and tells me that supper is ready, so I need to go."

Dani smiled. "Well tell him the same and I love you Jeanette. Miss you so much, behave and take care, oh and congratulations." She wiped her eyes because she missed her friend and hated to say goodbye.

"I love you too and you have fun with Mr. Mysterious, okay…do a few things I can't do right now." She laughed, waved and blew Dani a kiss and then she was gone.

Dani shut the computer with a sigh.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR 

Dani waited in the foyer while Juliette did her intake. They'd already been on the tour and even sat through a group session. Nico had team business to attend to, so he hadn't been able to come, so Juliette had come with Dani alone. She'd been quiet in the car, but Nico had said she was on Friday as well. Her methadone dose had gone down on Friday and she'd started on the clonidine. Dani figured it was probably due to the new medication since it could be one of the side effects. Nico had said she'd been a bit more irritable earlier in the morning.

Her phone chimed and she pulled it from her purse. It was a message from Nico. It was the fourth round of messages in the past ten minutes. The first had been asking about Juliette and making sure she was behaving. The second two were asking how the talk with the kids went. The third was a follow up on that, because Dani had texted that Ray Jay knew about them, but then she told him she'd talk to him about it later. She didn't want to text him about it. She glanced at her screen.

Nico: _Btw, u missing something?_

Dani frowned. She wasn't sure what he was talking about.

Dani: _What?_

Nico: _Just found something extra in my coat pocket._

Dani smiled, remembering how she tucked her panties in his pocket last night. She went hot just thinking about it and looked around to make sure no one was reading over her shoulder and texted back: _God, you made me so hot last night._

Was it just last night in her office? She closed her eyes and fought off the tingling heat. She crossed her arms as her nipples hardened at the memory and heat poured through her vein.

Nico: _I want you Dani._

She still couldn't believe she'd done that. God, the man made her do things. How the hell he made her want those things…and then the things she'd been thinking of since…god, she couldn't get some of them out of her head. Things she had no business wanting, or had ever dreamed of, things she didn't even know much about and she wasn't even sure if Nico wanted, but she….she shook her head to clear it.

Dani: _Want u 2. _

He was coming over for dinner later, maybe….She picked up her phone and texted him.

Dani: _What time is the game tomorrow?_

Nico: _4, y?_

Dani: _Sleep over?_

Nico: _Are u just going 2 torture me?_

Dani: _Big house, the doors lock._

Nico: _I won't lie Dani._

Dani: _So, I will if it comes to that._

There was a long pause. Dani wasn't sure what was going on. Maybe he decided no, maybe he was busy. She sighed and was about to put the phone away when it chimed.

Nico: _Okay. No lies._

Her heart was pounding in her chest like a girl asked to prom. She smiled and dropped the phone into her bag. She was starting to feel much better already. She almost jumped when Corinne's office door opened and Juliette came out.

She gave Dani an odd look. "We're done."

Dani stood. "How'd it go?"

She shrugged. "Fine, you know all the questions. Blood, hair, urine…list of rules." She held up a packet of information. "All the thou shalts and thou shalt nots." She looked down at a piece of paper. "Got my room assignment, want to check it out with me?" She glanced over her shoulder. "Corinne said it would be okay. Guest passes are good until dinner time."

Dani smiled. "Sure." She motioned toward the stairs. "The rooms are this way. I've been here before, but you took the tour too, so you probably remember."

"Kind of, it's a big place and I'm still shaky. I talked to Corinne about that, but she's with you on that. I'm a bit of a rare bird in here." She waved a hand. "They don't do a lot of slow withdrawals."

Dani shook her head. "No, usually it's a quick dry out with some clonidine patches." She talked as they went up the stairs. "So, you might not want to share that with many people in here."

She nodded. "That's what Corinne said." She hugged herself, it was the third time she'd done it. "Though, I'm feeling pretty shitty so, it won't be hard to sympathize trust me."

Dani frowned, if the girl was really feeling as bad as she was saying something else was going on. "Are you taking your pills?"

Juliette looked up at her, shocked. "Yea."

"Juliette, don't lie to me." She grabbed the girl's hand. "Hold your hand out for me." She watched and Juliette's hand was shaking horribly. "Okay, so the next question is; how are you taking the pills Juliette?"

"I…" She glared at Dani intensely. "Are you accusing me of something?"

She took Juliette's arm and turned them back around. By the time they were outside Corinne's office Juliette was sobbing. Dani knocked and when Corinne answered they went in.

Dani gave Corinne a hard glare even as she moved toward the other woman's desk. "You know already don't you?"

She sat back in her chair and looked up at Dani. She nodded. "Dani, calm down and sit." She pointed to the chairs. She waited and when Dani let go of Juliette and sat she finally spoke. "You know I can't tell you anything after she established a professional relationship me and then told me she thinks of you as family. It negates you as my colleague; you can't be her therapist and her mother figure Dani. If she needs another therapist for any outpatient treatment, I'd recommend someone from Harlan's office. What about Dr. Ellington? She's good."

Dani looked at Corinne. "Okay, I'm not arguing the professional boundary issues. In fact, I recognized them and have already addressed them with Juliette."

Corinne nodded. "Yes, she told me."

"Good." At least, Corinne knew she wasn't an idiot. "I'm talking about her misusing her methadone and how that's one, a serious health risk and two, a serious risk to her recovery and I should be notified for those reasons."

Corinne took a deep breath. "Well, she listed," she scrolled through the computer file a second, "Nico Careles as her emergency contact, you as her secondary, so he was notified. You would have been Dani if we were unable to contact him, trust me."

Dani looked over at Juliette. "Oh shit…it would have come much better from me."

Juliette started sobbing at this point. "I'm so sorry. It just…" She wiped her face. "I just wanted to forget and make the hurt go away. I knew the funeral would be hard so I hid my night dose under my tongue and suffered until morning." She shrugged. "Then it was easy. I just took them both in the morning, and you started me on the clonidine that night, so I just took that. But when the dose went down, it fucked me over again." She wiped her nose with a shaky hand.

Corinne handed Juliette a tissue and looked to Dani. "It happens Danielle, you know that. Don't hold it against yourself, which I know is exactly what you're doing." She reached across the desk and took Dani's hand, squeezed and then released it. "I talked to Juliette about it. She understands what she did and why she did it. She knows relapsing is common, and all things considered this is pretty mild." She pulled two prescriptions from her drawer and pushed them across the desk. "I've had our psychiatrist switch her to the dissolvable methadone tablets and clonidine patches so she can't manipulate her dosing. I'm sure you recognize that both you and Mr. Careles are too emotionally involved to stay impartial in her treatment. I think you'll be fine supervising her on the weekends Dani, you're more than qualified to oversee a recovering addict and keep them clean, but I'm glad you brought her to me."

Dani nodded and took the scripts from the desk. She knew Juliette's problems were more than she could handle in outpatient therapy. Corinne could offer her more than just the drug rehab as well. There were psychiatrists and psychologists on staff also. Juliette's problems went deeper than her drug abuse and Dani hoped she was able to get some of that dealt with as well. "You do good work here Corinne. You know how I feel about this place." She smiled at the other woman. "I wish you'd spoke to me before calling Mr. Careles, but I understand."

Corinne inclined her head. "We have to follow the rules." She looked to Juliette. "Did you still want to see your room?"

Juliette shrugged and looked at her feet.

Dani sighed. "Come on Juliette, let's go check out your room. It's either that or head back home and face Nico now." She stood and waited no more than a second and Juliette was up and heading toward the office door.

"Okay, yea let's check out the room." She mumbled something under her breath and yanked open the door.

"Sorry for being accusatory Corrine." Dani held out her hand.

Corinne smiled. "It's okay Dani, you're stressed, I get it. Trust me, out of all the things people hurl at me under stressful situations, yours was mild." She came around the desk and hugged Dani. She pulled back. "Don't let the kid get to you. I know she's already in your heart, just be careful she doesn't break it. Kids like that can if you aren't careful Dani. You want to help them, but they aren't always ready to help themselves." She glanced to the door. "She might be though; her father's death seems to be a big thing for her. So, I'm hopeful with this kid, but still be careful."

Dani nodded. "I'll be careful and thanks."

Dani found Juliette waiting for her at the bottom of the stairs. She smiled at the girl. "Okay, so you ready now?"

"Yes, and Dani I'm sorry about messing up again." She looked Dani in the eye. "I just didn't know what to do."

Dani put and arm around her shoulder as they started up the stairs. "Juliette, you don't have to know what to do, but you can always talk to me or Nico. Anytime, day or night…" She paused at the top of the stairs to look at her. "Even if it's just because you have the sudden urge to get high, you can call and talk."

"Really?" She looked at her paper, checking the room number and then pointed to the left. "I think I'm this way."

Dani glanced down at the paper and then nodded. "Yes and really. You never woke your mother up to talk to her when you needed to, or your dad or your friend or anyone?"

Juliette pulled back and looked at Dani just outside of her assigned room; 228. "Um, no…like once a boyfriend and he just yelled at me, so never again and mom would just hang up or shut her door on me. Nico would talk to me at his house if I woke up in the middle of the night he always heard me and he'd come out and talk, but that's it and the new bodyguard chick, she's cool."

"I'm sorry about that, but like I said, you call me, or Nico or hell Lindsay or Ray Jay even. I don't care, call someone." Dani reached for the door and knocked. Though the rooms were private she wanted to be sure no one was inside anyway. When no one answered she turned the knob and opened the door. "Here you are." She stepped back so Juliette could enter first.

The room was plain, but comfortable. A double bed, dresser and desk in typical modern straight lines filled the small room. The floor was the same institutional tile of the rest of the place. There was a 13 inch flat screen TV affixed to the wall and an adjoining bath off to the left. The bath was small and Juliette wrinkled up her nose at the tiny tub and shower combo.

"Well, it could be worse." She checked out the closet, then tested the bed. "The bed is good though."

Dani tried to hide her smile. This was actually one of the good rooms. Private rooms with private baths weren't cheap. There was a noise behind her and she turned.

"Dr. D and Blondie what are you two doing in my neighborhood? Slumming are you?"

"TK, I was showing Juliette around. She'll be checking in on Monday." Dani smiled and then found herself wrapped in TK's arms. She hugged him back. She actually missed him quite a bit. "How are you doing Terrence?"

He let her go. "Good, Dr. Dani, good. I just got back from cleaning out the stalls." He held up a hand. "I swear I wasn't playing cowboy again, just doing my chores like a good boy."

At the mention of the horses Juliette perked up. "You were at the stables?"

TK smiled. "Sure was Blondie, you can smell my Nikes if you wanna." He winked. "Just kiddin, seriously how you doing? This your room? Really? We're neighbors." He pointed at her and then across the hall. "I'm 231. Not really surprising, this is the private wing and not many private rooms left. He looked around the room. This was Jimmy's…but that's not..." He played with the large 88 hanging around his neck, suddenly subdued. "So, you need anything babygirl, you knock, okay? I'm gonna shower before dinner. I don't wanna be smelling like Seabiscuit while I eat. You know what I mean?"

Dani nodded. He did have a bit of a gamey smell to him. "You probably should shower."

"You saying I actually do smell Dr. D?" He gave her a mocking glare and smiled at her.

She rolled her eyes at him.

Juliette laughed at him. "I like it, reminds me of my horses." She had moved closer to TK, not inappropriately, but she was closer to the door and leaning against it now.

Dani's eyebrows rose. This could not be good. She watched the smile spread on TK's face. She knew that look, quite well in fact. Every female in every club, every good looking reporter, hell pretty much every pretty face he'd ever seen, had been on the receiving end of _that_ smile, and now he was giving the same smile to Juliette Pittman. Dani's warning bells were going off.

TK leaned closer to Juliette. "Yea? Maybe you can help me in the stables sometime?" He winked at her. "Works up a good sweat." His eyes said way more than his words.

Juliette giggled.

Dani cleared her throat and took Juliette's arm. "Okay, enough with the innuendo, smelly Romeo. Juliette needs to get back to Nico." She added purposely as she glared at TK. She shoved a finger at his chest. "You cold shower. Alone." He moved toward his door. She pulled Juliette behind her as she closed the door. "We have to head back. I have to get dinner started and you're going to help me." She looked over her shoulder to where TK was still standing, leaning against his doorjamb. "Goodnight Terrence."

He smiled, almost laughing at her. "'Night Dr. D. You too Jules, seriously you need anything you let me know and I'll see you Monday babygirl." He winked and pulled out his key, unlocked his door and went inside.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Nico hung up the phone with a frown. He was not happy with what Corinne had told him, but he wasn't really surprised. If there was one thing he'd learned about Juliette and her father it was that they both were persistent in their addiction. He rubbed the back of his neck and opened the top drawer of his desk to find the small bottle of Tylenol he kept there. He was getting a kickass headache and he knew he better head it off. He popped two of the pills and chased them with a swallow of his cooling coffee just as Xeno knocked on his door.

He waved the other man in.

"What's going on?" He set his cup down and pushed back from his desk. Xeno had a file in his hand and Nico eyed it seriously. He hadn't asked the other man for anything.

Xeno held up the paperwork. "Tommy stopped by and asked me to drop this off to you. He said it was important and to hand deliver it to you, so here I am." He moved into the office and held the folder out.

Nico took the file and set it down. He wouldn't open it until Xeno was gone. "Thanks. The assignments seem to be going alright so far? Any problems?"

The bigger man shook his head. "Nah, I moved a couple of the guys around for personality reasons, but nothing big. I noted it on the roster so you know next time around. I mean, Carlisle chews and Williams hates the habit so I just keep them apart on the road." He shrugged. "Nothing else and seems Swisher and Hancock are good, they were playing checkers in the clubhouse earlier." He scratched his head. "Go figure huh. How about you boss? You okay?"

Nico nodded. "I'm alright, just tough losing a friend."

Xeno nodded, he knew. "Yep, lost plenty of good friends, never gets easier." He was a soldier, he knew the drill. "How's Ms. Pittman boss?"

Nico cleared his throat. "She's hurting Xeno, but she's strong and we'll take care of her." He nodded at the bigger man. "Thanks for all your help at the funeral."

Xeno ducked his head and blushed already heading for the door. "No problem boss. You let me know if you or Ms. Juliette needs anything." Then he was gone.

He pulled the sealed from the file and opened it. He found a short note from Tommy.

_Boss, _

_This is a list of people who purchased or traded for Ms. P's vid. Most are just IP addresses, but they can be traced back. A few of them are names, stupid people used cards to for their purchase. I'm not sure what you want to do with the info, but here it is. _

_Tommy_

The next page was a list of six names, including last known addresses and fifteen IP addresses. Nico read over the page and then closed the folder before locking it in his secure file cabinet. He wasn't sure exactly what he wanted to do with the information yet either. He'd think about it and decide if he wanted to deal with it or let the police deal with it.

He felt sick in his gut. He knew Juliette wasn't underage in the video, but he also know she wasn't really able to consent. God, he didn't want to think about how many people had seen her like that. Hell, he hadn't seen the video and he didn't want to know. Even if he tracked down the people on the list there was no guarantee there were no other copies. Shit, he was sure there were. He was positive it was cached on so many computers and posted on so many sites by now that they'd never get rid of it. He longed for the age of video tapes. A copy could still be out there, but the copies spread much slower.

He looked up just as Matt Donnally stepped into his office. He was not in the mood.

"Donnally, what do you need?"

"I was checking on the Swisher and Hancock situation. How's it look, good for next week?" He leaned against the doorjamb, arms crossed.

Nico eyed him carefully, but nodded. "Yes, so far so good nothing's showed in the media. How's Swisher's face?"

Donnally shrugged. "Doc says he'll be fine for next week." He shoved away from the door. "You doing okay Nico? I really am sorry about Marshall. I know we have our differences, but I've lost friends before and I know it's not easy."

Nico was taken aback, but he recovered quickly. "Thank you. I'm doing okay." He watched Matt hesitate in his doorway. "Is there something else I can do for you?"

Matt pointed to Nico's coat hanging on its hook. "Taken to keeping souvenirs now Careles?" His tone was snide and it was obvious he'd noticed the slip of pink and black in the pocket. "I'm pretty sure Dani would appreciate more discretion."

"You might want to remember a little discretion next time you hold," his eyebrow rose, "after hour business meetings in your office." He pointed to a point on the ceiling in the common area. "Be sure the blinds are completely closed, that camera gets a clear shot of your desk." He cleared his throat. "So, yes I know about all three times you and Dr. Santino used your desk and the times you had various reporters in the training room and don't get me started on Ms. Radcliffe."

The other man's jaw clenched along with his fists. "Spying to get your thrills Nico?"

Nico smiled coolly and leaned back in his chair. "Part of my job is reviewing the security tapes Matt, you know that. I also know who you take into the men's room with you." He gave him a cocky look. "So, when you spend twenty five minutes together in the bathroom, it's pretty obvious what's going on."

Matt sputtered and turned red. "Stay out of my business Careles."

"Then keep your business out of the office Donnally and we won't have a problem." Nico stood up and moved around his desk. "We do have rules about this on the books and I'm supposed to report them." He moved closer to the Assistant GM. "I've never brought them up, never once threatened you with it. I've always just left it alone." He shrugged. "Figured it wasn't anyone's business because it wasn't threatening anyone's job or the team. It still isn't, but I'm still supposed to add certain things to my reports. Things that might damage the team, hurt morale, things that might come back and bite us in the ass." He paused, waited for it to sink in. Then he continued, "I do it with the players. Break the rules, it shows in the weekly reports even if it's a curfew violation. Have you seen your name on a violation report?" He waited, when Matt didn't answer, he answered for him. "The answer is no, Matt. No, and the reason is because, for the most part, I respect you and like you. I made a choice to not include your name because I felt keeping you here was good for the team and I know Marshall probably wouldn't have seen it that way." He stopped about two feet from the other man, crossed his arms. "Don't make me regret that decision."

Matt blinked and then he turned and walked away.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Dani was stirring sauce when kids came home. The sauce was her secret and she tasted it to be sure it was right. She set the wooden spoon aside with a nod and glanced at Juliette, who was sitting at the counter carefully slicing some cucumbers for the salad. Dani checked the time. She was wondering where Nico was. He should have been there by now.

Lindsay came into the kitchen. "Mom…oh, hey Juliette, how are you?" She pulled the other girl into a hug."

Juliette hugged Lindsay back and shrugged. "Okay. Just helping your mom, sort of, but I'm not good with this cooking stuff." She smirked at Dani and then added her slices to the bowl. "I'm pretty sure she would be done by now."

Dani shook her head. "Well, I'd still have to do it, so not really."

Lindsay pulled a knife from the block and started slicing some tomatoes. She looked to her mother. "So, we got grandma a sweater, something she'll like and that horrible perfume she likes." She made a face and finished the tomatoes.

Dani stuck her tongue out. "That stuff is horrid. Makes her smell like lilacs and cat pee."

Juliette started giggling. "Sounds lovely." She slid the rest of the cucumbers into the salad bowl and laid the knife on the cutting board. "That sauce smells really good though."

Ray Jay hit the kitchen door about then. "It is really good, god it is sooo good." He smiled and then hugged Juliette. "Are you okay?" He kissed her cheek. "I am so sorry about everything." He sounded a bit awkward, but his concern was genuine.

Juliette hugged him back and then pulled away. "I'm okay I guess. I mean this all sucks, but you guys are cool." She sighed. "Your mom is great."

Ray Jay smiled. "She's the best really." He looked at his mom and then blushed, cleared his throat. "Yea, um I'm gonna go watch TV. I'm sure something's on; wanna watch something?"

She looked to Dani.

Dani nodded. "Go, all of you out of my kitchen." She made a shooing motion with her hands. She checked on brownies in the oven and then poured herself a glass of wine. She took a sip just as there was knock on the door.

"I got it." She told the kids as she set her glass down, her heart was pounding in excitement because she knew who it was. She moved to the foyer, took a breath and opened the door.

Nico stood there on her porch in a pair of jeans, a dark button down and his wool coat. He had an overnight bag on his shoulder and a bottle of wine in his hand. He held it up with a smile. "Sorry I'm a bit late and I know you like those ten dollar bottles, but Juliette mentioned chicken parmesan and I thought this might go quite nicely."

Dani stepped onto the porch and kissed him quickly on the cheek. "You're not really late and I'm sure the wine'll be perfect. Come on in. let's put your bag in my office."

Nico's eyes sparkled at the mention of her office and he followed her enjoying the view from behind. He shut the door once they were in her office, let his bag slide from his shoulder to the floor and then almost immediately pulled her into his arms. "I missed you." He kissed her quickly and then pulled her underwear from the pocket of his coat. He held them up. "Now, somehow these found their way into my coat pocket and I didn't find them until I got to the office." He gave her and odd look. "Which isn't like me Dani." He gripped her hips and pulled her hips against his. "Maybe you're distracting me." He kissed her neck to her ear. "Making me sloppy?" His voice was thick and coarse sounding.

She arched her neck and shivered. God, she was ready to strip naked for him in her office again. "Or maybe you just left your coat in your car last night and didn't bother to put it on until this morning because it was cold?"

He smiled against her cheek and then pulled back and looked at her. "Are you spying on me now?"

She chuckled. "No, but you threw the coat in the backseat, it would be easy to forget it." She shrugged and then took her panties. "I suppose I should put these in the laundry…unless you want to keep them?" She winked at him.

He shook his head. All that would do is get him in more trouble. "No." He bent to kiss her again. This kiss was a slow seduction with his mouth while his hands slid to her ass where they splayed to press her against him. He pulled back with some difficulty. "I'd have us skip dinner if I could." He stepped back and took Dani's hand. "Let me help you get dinner finished and you tell me about your day."

Dani took a breath and nodded and together they went back to the kitchen. "I need to get dessert out of the oven, damn I hope it's not burnt."

_Later…_

Juliette sat on Lindsay's bed after dinner. They'd decided they were going to watch a movie together, but at the moment they were listening to music while Lindsay checked her Facebook account. Jillette Johnson's album _Whiskey and Frosting_ was playing and Lindsay was going on about some hot guy from school. Juliette was only half listening, but if she were honest she wasn't having a bad time. She wasn't lonely or bored, she was just thinking about her dad and when Lindsay asked her something she had to ask her to repeat the question.

"What?"

"I asked if you had a boyfriend." Lindsay rolled to her side as she closed Facebook, but left the laptop open.

Juliette shook her head. "Oh, no…never really had one I guess."

"Really?" Lindsay sat up. "You're like beautiful and rich and you travel everywhere. How have you never had a boyfriend?"

Juliette pulled a stuffed purple rabbit from the pillow and played with its ears. She sighed and thought about the question with a shrug. "I don't know. I mean I've had plenty of guys and a couple of times I had a guy I like stayed with for maybe a month, but I wouldn't say we were ever serious."

"Really? A month isn't that bad. I mean it's not long, but I guess I've dated a guy that long and called him a boyfriend." She looked at the older girl. "You said you had guys, so you mean you were sleeping with them, right?"

Juliette looked at her like she was crazy. "Um, yea…what else would I mean? You don't sleep with your boyfriends?"

Lindsay blushed. "I haven't yet…no." She sat up. "I've been with a couple I've been tempted to, but then I guess I really never wanted to. I haven't been that serious with them." She studied her fingernails. "I mean I want to really love the guy before I have sex with him."

Juliette was quiet. "I guess I didn't get that memo growing up."

"It's not a memo." Lindsay laughed nervously. "I mean don't you just feel it inside? Like when they want you to do it and you aren't ready…doesn't it make you feel," she paused and thought, "I don't know…like the first time especially is supposed to be special or something?"

The older girl shrugged. "The first time pretty much sucks, but you get over that. Then you figure out what feels good." She looked down and her hair fell into her face. "Most of the guys don't care much about what you want anyway, they just want to get off so that's what they do. If you happen to enjoy yourself that's a bonus, but they want you to act like you love it. If you don't then it's not them, it's you and that's exactly what they say and they get can get mean and angry about it."

She took a breath and continued. "I didn't like being alone much and with dad off in isolation trying to find himself, burying his own pain, making sure Nico wouldn't take my calls and mom ignoring me to be with her own boy toys, it was either be alone or find some guy. And when dad cut off a big chunk of my cash, well…" She shrugged, "I had to do something and guys are easy enough to come by. Smile, toss your hair and spread your legs and they'll pay you attention, buy you things, take you on trips, but eventually they expect more." She paused and shivered. "That's when the drugs and the alcohol start. They make all of the other stuff go away." She looked at Lindsay with all the cold pain in her eyes. "So, I fuck them, and their friends…their girlfriends, let them do whatever they want to me, so they're nice. Then they don't hurt me, they buy me more drugs, nicer clothes, let me stay in nice hotels, just like daddy used to before he cut me off. They give you what I want. They pay attention to me…someone pretends to love me and wants me around, even if it's just for a half an hour, a day or a week."

"Oh my god, that is so fucked up." Lindsay gasped and then took Juliette's hand. "I'm so sorry." She wrapped her arms around and hugged the other girl and when Juliette didn't stop her, she cried for her.

After a minute Juliette started crying and returned Lindsay's hug. She was surprised that she let herself sob into the other girl's shoulder. This was the second time she'd broken down with Lindsay. She was comfortable with her and for the first time she realized she'd never really had a friend that wasn't looking for something from her. She sobbed and hugged the girl tighter.

A few minutes later, Lindsay pulled back with a sniff. "You okay?" When Juliette gave her a nod, she dug under her bed for a box of tissues. "Okay, so this is not what I had in mind when I said let's watch a movie." She gave a teary smile and pulled a couple of tissues from the slightly dusty box and then handed it to Juliette.

Juliette snorted and took a tissue. She wiped her eyes and nose. "Okay, so what did you have in mind?"

Lindsay smiled and stood, she checked the hall and then she shut her door. She pulled a CD case from the shelf and opened it. There was an unmarked CD inside. She smiled. "Well, not that it makes up for all those men objectifying you, but we can objectify some hot men." She winked. "Hope you're in the mood to watch hot men take their clothes off." She opened the DVD drive on her computer and popped in the disk. "Because, I just happen to have a bootleg copy of Magic Mike, but it's just between us. Mom would kill me."

A huge smile spread across Juliette's face. "I promise not to tell and I'm all in for sexy naked men."

Lindsay nudged Juliette's shoulder with her own. "Who isn't?"

"Have you met my bodyguard Ronnie?" Juliette smirked. "I'm a hundred percent sure she's in the "isn't" camp." She winked at Lindsay.

Both girl's giggled and then settled down as the movie started.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR 

Nico stood on the patio with Ray Jay, and he was smiling because Ray Jay somehow made him smile, more than he really could explain. He'd just finished explaining what Ray Jay needed to know about the rose bushes for the fall and now the kid was going on about some girl and how "absolutely smoking" she was. This of course was followed by an explanation of her assets, in more detail than Nico cared to know. Nico cleared his throat when the story moved on to her sexual prowess.

He grabbed the boy's collar, pulling him up short as they headed toward the door. "Whoa, Ray Jay, please stop. I really don't need to hear about Ms. Barely Legal's ability to fellate the entire basketball team." He gave Ray Jay a stern look. "Also, is this the type of girl you really want to be with?"

Ray Jay's jaw dropped open. "Dude, are you nuts? Weren't you listening to the story?" He reached for the door again.

Nico stopped him, again. "No. We are not going inside until we finish this conversation." He rubbed the back of his neck. "And yes, I was listening to the story which is why I asked you the question and I'll ask it again. Do you really want to be with a girl that had her mouth around every cock on the basketball team?" He looked the kid in the eye. "So, you know for a fact she's done what, fourteen, fifteen guys, probably more and from what you said safe sex was not involved, so that's risking disease each time. I'm sure her habits are similar at other times, so more partners, more unsafe sex and then you want to what? Bring this girl home to your mother? Bang her? What Ray Jay?"

Ray Jay stood there and stared at him. "You are a serious boner killer."

"I'm a serious dose of reality Ray Jay." He crossed his arms. "I'm not your mother or father, but I am your mom's friend and I'll tell you how it really is. I was a kid, I made stupid teenage choices and they followed me around the rest of my life. I wish there had been someone there to stop me. To do what I'm doing right now. To just lay it out in plain language I understood, so I'm trying to do that for you." He grabbed Ray Jay's shoulder. "That girl Ray Jay, is not worth it. Just stay away from her. Sexy girls are easy to find, they're a dime a dozen, because anyone can have them and everyone has. Just keep looking for a girl that's sexy and sweet, trust me they're worth waiting for."

He hung his head and pouted, kicked the patio below his foot with the toe of his shoe. He snorted. "You're saying that because right now you can get ass anytime you want it."

Nico moved and suddenly Ray Jay found his arm twisted uncomfortably with one of Nico's hands pressing down on his elbow while one pressed up and in on his wrist. The pressure bent Ray Jay forward.

"Say it again Ray Jay." Nico's voice was a low threat. "I like you, but you're crossing a line, especially right now. I know you know about me and your mom, so that is especially disrespectful." He applied a bit more pressure.

"Ow, ow…Nico…god, let go…shit…sorr….sorry…fuck…" Sweat broke out on the kid's forehead and he was standing on his toes to avoid the pressure on his joints. "Let go…let go….sorry."

Nico let go and stepped back. He hadn't hurt him, he knew exactly what he was doing and that was a warning. When Ray Jay straightened up he even rubbed the spot above the kid's elbow where most of the pressure had been applied, ignoring Ray Jay's flinch. "That was a warning Ray Jay. Don't disrespect your mother, I warned you about that before."

Ray Jay nodded. "Dude, you weren't kidding." He gingerly bent his elbow and then rolled his wrist in a circle. "Okay, point taken. I won't underestimate you again. I will stay on your good side and respect mom and you. The whole you with mom subject is now off limits." Ray Jay took a breath and looked Nico in the eye before he lost his nerve. "I just have to tell you this, even if you hurt me because of it. You hurt mom and I will find a way to make sure you regret it. Now please don't do the arm thing again." He took three steps backward and held up his phone like a shield.

Nico laughed and pointed at Ray Jay. "I like you kid." He put his arm around his shoulder. "You're gutsy, like your mom. Just remember what I told you about the roses." He watched Ray Jay nod. "Good. So, stay away from the basketball groupie."

"Fine…I'll find some other girl to date." He opened the door. "I think some of the guys are heading to a movie or something, I might go check with mom and see if it's okay if I go. Thanks for the talk. I actually like talking to you. I said before I like that you don't talk to me like a stupid kid, but I'm not really sold on the whole almost breaking my arm thing, so next time let's leave that out."

"Next time, keep it respectful and I won't have to break out the Jujitsu on your ass." Nico moved to the sink to wash his hands and watched the kid disappear into the living room.

He finished at the sink and found the scotch on the shelf. He was pouring some into a glass when Dani slipped into the kitchen. He smiled. "Hope you don't mind."

She shook her head. "No." She took the bottle and added some to glass and then she added some water.

He raised an eyebrow. "Really, I thought you didn't care for it?"

She smiled and moved closer to him. "Well, I was experimenting after you left. I wanted to figure out why you liked it and I found the water sort of releases the flavors. I don't know if I love it, but I can definitely taste more of the nuance and I think the dark chocolate in the brownies might work with it?"

He smiled and pulled her against his side and he bent to press a kiss to her hair. "I think you'd be right." He sipped his drink and let her go to cut them each a piece of the dessert and then drizzle it with the caramel sauce and homemade whipped cream she'd also made.

They moved to the family room and sat. Dani turned on some music and for a minute it was quiet as they ate. Nico watched her and finished about half his brownie before setting on the table beside him and reaching for his scotch.

"That's delicious Dani." He sipped and then set the glass down, he watched her with hungry eyes, but the brownie wasn't appeasing his appetite. "Did Ray Jay head to the movies?"

She nodded and set her own plate down. "Yes and the girls are engrossed in their own movie." She picked up her glass and sipped the heady liquor. She swirled the amber liquid and then took another sip. She didn't know what the next step was, but she knew what she wanted. It was still early, only about nine-thirty, the girl's would probably be down eventually and Ray Jay would be home by twelve-thirty. She looked up at Nico. "What about you, do you want to watch a movie? Talk?"

He shook his head. "Not really." He slid across the couch and took the glass from her hand. "We've talked enough for today." He sat the glass on the coffee table and then slid his arm around her shoulders. "I really just want you Danielle." His lips pressed to her neck. "What do you think about that?" He bit lightly and traced his tongue along her collarbone. His nose moved along the curve of her neck to her ear. "You still want to talk?" The hand that wasn't on her shoulder had moved up the inside of her thigh and was kneading lightly. "Interested in a movie?" His breath rustled her hair.

Dani shivered and swallowed the lump in her throat before she wet her suddenly very dry lips with the tip of tongue. Her legs opened of their own accord and she slowly shook her head as she reached for him. "God, I can hardly hold a thought in my head. Kiss me." She tilted her head toward him and opened her mouth under his when his mouth found hers.

The hand on her shoulder slid into her hair and he shifted on the couch so he could deepen the kiss, but he didn't push the pace. He kept it leisurely, enjoying the satin of her hair as it slid over his hand and the slide of her tongue against his. He savored the small puffs of air against his skin and the scrape of her teeth against his lip. He tasted, pushed and plied her. His tongued parried and thrust and then retreated only to return again with a different attack. The hand on her thigh moved light and soft, teasing but not satisfying.

Dani moaned into his mouth and played along. Her tongued teased and tasted back. She'd learned not to push so she didn't, though she did shift her position and press her legs wider. She was so wet, just from the kisses. He turned her on so much and she was amazed. She pulled back to catch her breath. "God, where did you learn how to kiss." She panted, her head pressed against flesh where his neck and shoulder met. She took a deep breath, inhaled his scent; breathed him in and shivered all over again. She looked up at him with a sly smile. She knew her face was flushed.

He brushed her lower lip with his thumb. "Why, you have a complaint?" He pushed her hair over her shoulder and dragged his calloused fingertips down the sensitive side of her neck. He watched her skin bloom with goose bumps.

She shivered and shook her head. "Hell no, but you can about make me about cum just by kissing me." She playfully bit his chin and then rubbed her cheek against the stubble.

"Hmm, you know one day I might just test that theory of yours." He let his fingers brush the across the swells of her breasts. "I think that has potential under the right circumstance." His eyebrow rose before his mouth found hers again. He didn't hesitate with this kiss and his tongue pushed into her mouth not just to seduce and ply, but to take control. Even his body leaned into her space, warming the air around her and surrounding her with his scent. His hand held the nape of her neck, controlling the kiss, deepening it more, guiding her where he wanted her and he savored it when she moaned into his mouth. It was a soft whimpering sound and he had to admit it hit hard; had him hard.

Dani knew she was getting overwhelmed. He always did overwhelm her and she wondered when he would stop having that effect on her. She pulled back, turned her head to the side to catch her breath. "Here is not good." She looked at Nico. She was hot, wanted less clothing on herself and on him. She glanced toward the stairs. "If Lindsay comes down…Juliette, again."

Nico watched her blush and smiled. "Juliette has been warned to keep herself scarce and quiet, but we could move to your office." He stood and pulled Dani up with him. "That door does lock and the couch worked just fine for us last night." He winked and kissed her forehead before he picked up their plates. "Why don't you grab our glasses?" He headed to the kitchen leaving Dani to follow.

She stood there for a few seconds and then picked up the glasses. She shook her head and tried to figure out exactly what was going on, but she did follow him into the kitchen. He wasn't there. She put Nico's empty glass down by the plates and then finished the liquor in her own, grimacing when it burned. She put the glass down and turned back toward her office.

She found him sitting on the couch. His feet were bare, his legs were crossed and his arms were draped across the back. His posture was casual, but the look in his eyes was anything but.

"Shut the door and lock it Danielle."

She shut the door and locked it without hesitation. She noticed that he had the blinds closed and the table lamp was on. She turned and walked toward the couch with her eyes on Nico. "I'm never going to think of you in this room the same again." She stopped in front of him. "I still can't believe you actually…" she paused, her voice dropped to a whisper, "spanked me."

Nico uncrossed his legs so that Dani was standing between his knees and he sat up a bit. His hands stroked up her legs to her hips. He let his eyes rake over her, lingering on her lips, then her breasts, then back to her eyes. "You deserved it." He gave her a wicked smile and tugged her toward him. "And you loved it."

She lost her balance and fell forward. Her hands scrabbled for purchase on his shoulders, only settling when his hands moved up to her waist. She huffed at him, her knee sliding and settling between his legs. "I did not." She bit her lip.

He glanced down at her knee. "You did deserve it Dani." He slid a hand to her ass, watched her eyes cloud as he did and sat up so his mouth was by her ear. He kept his voice low. "And last night…you were so wet from it." He traced her ear with his nose. "Right now the look on your face only proves to me how much you loved it. All day, you were thinking about it, weren't you? Thought about how hot it made you?" He let his hand slide up and down her ass while he talked to her. "You liked the anticipation of each slap, didn't you Dani? Right now it's getting you so wet just thinking about it. I bet I could be balls deep in you right now you're so wet aren't you?" He bit the curl of her ear, tugged it, then let his tongue tease over it. "The whole time you're thinking about my hand pinking up your ass." He pressed his forehead to her temple and took a ragged breath and squeezed her ass. "God, Dani it felt so good when I finally slid inside you last night."

Dani bit her lip and shut her eyes. Her breathing was irregular and he was barely touching her. She didn't understand how he knew it. She opened her eyes and blinked. She traced a finger along his jaw. She wanted to tell him to get out of her head, to stop reading her mind, but that's not really what she wanted. It was only that she didn't understand it. The fact that he knew what she needed and how felt was more than she could handle. His name was all she managed and it was a desperate sound, even to her, "Nico…"

He took her hand and pressed a kiss to the palm, swirled his tongue over the sensitive flesh there. "I can see how much you loved it. It's written on your face, and don't you dare tell me you didn't deserve it." He chuckled. He nudged Dani's knee, lifted it to the outside of his leg and then settled her on his lap. "Mmm, better." He lifted his hips, pressed his cock against her and smiled when her head fell back on her shoulders. "I figured you'd like that too baby." He let his hands drift up her sides and then his fingers found the buttons to her blouse and he made quick work of them. He slid the shirt off her shoulders and down her arms. "I enjoyed spanking you Dani, god I needed it as much as you. You were so damn sexy. Anytime you feel you need another one, just let me know." He left arms in her sleeves and kissed her while his hands played over her breasts.

She moaned and struggled to free her arms, but her cuffs had buttons and the sleeves were inside out. She pulled back. "Nico…" She gestured with arms. "Help."

He smiled and pulled the cups of her bra down so he could see her breasts. "Oops, it looks like you're stuck." He bent and pulled a nipple into his mouth, sucking until Dani moaned softly and stopped worrying about her arms. Then he moved to the other breast. All the while, his hands worked open the small zipper along the left hip of her slacks and he cursed inwardly, damn dress pants. He lifted his head from her chest. "I don't like these pants." He kissed her belly and then lifted her from his lap so she stood.

Dani swayed, off balance until Nico steadied her. Then she smiled and took the opportunity to work the small buttons on her cuffs free once she was standing and slid her hands from her sleeves while Nico was tugging her pants down her hips. She dropped the shirt to the floor, tossed her bra and then sank her fingers into his hair and tugged until he looked up at her. She smiled down at him, bent and kissed him. She kicked free of her pants and then stood in front of him naked. "Again, I'm naked and you aren't."

He let himself look at her. "I could look at you all day, but I really don't want to look right now." He stood and unbuttoned his jeans and then peeled them down his legs; his shirt followed. When he was as naked as Dani her smiled. "Are you quite happy now?"

She nodded and reached out to touch him. He shivered when her nails ran up his sides and she repeated the gesture hoping to elicit the same response, but that wasn't what happened at all.

Nico captured her hands, spun her around and pulled her back against his chest. His hands slid to her breasts. "Mm, now this is much better." He bent to ear. "I've been dreaming of bending you over the back of the couch." He backed up, moving Dani with him until he was behind the couch and then he bent over her. He pressed her hands down onto the back. "Keep your hands here." His hands pressed against hers for a second and then slid up her arms and back to her breasts. He played with her nipples, pulled and rolled them both until she moaned and her head fell forward. "God, I love when you make that sound Dani."

She looked over her shoulder at him. Her hair was in her eyes. "You make me crazy." She pressed her ass toward him. "Please touch me, god I need you."

He used his toe, pushed her left foot outward to spread her legs wider as he continued to tease her nipples and then he kissed a line down her spine. He stopped his assault on her breasts and used his hands to still the sway of her hips, smiling against her lower back and bit at her hip. "Sit still Dani." He licked at the little dimple where her ass and back met.

Dani whimpered and pressed her head into the cushions. "Please…" She couldn't remember anyone spending as much time on her back and the dimples of her ass. For a split second she thought about the jiggle of forty year old, two kid cellulite, but god, when Nico's tongue and hands slid over her skin that way, it made her feel like a goddess. He whispered to her how sexy, how beautiful she was and she couldn't help believe him. He made her believe it. His fingers ran down the crease of her ass, just brushed her clit and she lifted her head with a deep throated moan. She opened her legs even more. "Please…please…"

Nico smiled and straightened his mouth to her ear again as he pressed his cock to her ass. "I love it when you beg me Dani." He rocked against her and let his hand drift around her, down to find her clit and he stroked her slickness. He pressed and swirled until she pressed against forward into his hand gasping, not quite cumming, but close.

He pulled his hand away and she groaned in frustration. She looked back at him. "Damn it Nico, please." Her hair was in her face and she tried to swing it out of her face, angry now. She really wanted to grab him, make him make her cum or do it her damn self, but he'd asked her keep her hands on the couch. She was starting to learn his games, to even enjoy them; fine she'd admit if only to herself.

He brushed her hair back in his hand, used his grip to arch her neck and kiss her. The kiss wasn't rough, but it accomplished its purpose. When he pulled back, she was dazed. He smiled and moved back behind her, "I was getting a condom." He kept one hand in her hair and held her hip with the other. "Help me out." He nudged between her legs and waited for her to reach between them, grab him guide him to her entrance. Once he felt her wet heat surround the tip he smiled when he realized she was rubbing her clit. "No." He pulled on her hair. "Hands back on the couch."

She bit her lip, frustrated and confused because the request made her arousal spike, but she did what he asked and put her hands back on the couch.

He held her hip and pushed forward nice and slow taking the time to savor the feel of her body swallowing him bit by bit. He let his head fall back. "God Dani you feel so good. So soft, so hot, so wet and I could spend an entire lifetime inside you." He buried himself and bent over her. He kissed her neck, pushed against her ass, circled and pumped his hips quick and short before slowly pulling out almost completely.

Dani moaned into the sofa back. Her hands flexed and bunched up the throw along the back. Her back arched when Nico pulled her hair and raised her head from the sofa. "Oh god, yes please." She turned her neck to find his lips and moaned when his lips crashed against hers.

"Fuck yes Dani." He kissed and bit down her neck as he thrust into her. Then he released her hair and gripped her hips, pulled her back for more leverage and then reached around to touch her clit with the index and middle fingers of his right hand. He circled and pressed as he thrust. "So hot…so damn sexy." He pulled almost completely out and hovered, just stroking her clit with the tip of his cock just inside her. He just sat there. "Dani, trust me." It was torture for him, but he waited and let his fingers work over her swollen clit.

She moaned, "What? Please Nico…god what are doing?" She tried to push back, but his fingers were rubbing her and he held her hip." She needed him, wanted him inside her so much. "What are you doing to me, please…" He kept up the pressure with his fingers and the entire time, whispered to her about trust and how fucking hot and sexy she was. "You're killing me…I'm burning up."

He bit his lip and laughed, but even to him it sounded more like a strangled grunt. "Me too…" he thrust a bit deeper and groaned deep in his throat. "Almost baby…it'll be worth it, I promise….you're so close." He teased his other hand up to her breast and pulled her nipple until she moaned long and low and then her legs started to shake uncontrollably. He bent to her ear. "Now…baby god yes." He let himself slide completely and moaned as her heat wrapped around him again. "Yes, god Dani…"

She hissed and her head flew back. His fingers kept their pace, round and round, on her clit and then he withdrew and slammed into her over and over hard and fast and Dani's breath was gone. Her eyes flew open, she made a low, strangled sound in her throat and if it weren't for the fact that Nico's mouth suddenly was on hers she probably would have screamed as she came.

Nico smiled as he captured Dani's lips as she came. Only pulling his mouth from hers when he needed to breath and she was reduced to small, whimpering sounds and then lowering her upper body to sofa back. He gripped her hips tighter as her legs began to shake; thankful she was bent over the sofa. He felt her body pulse around him and he didn't bother to wait on his own pleasure, but thrust twice, ground his teeth, closed his eyes and came deep inside Dani's willing body.


	15. Crosswords and Crossroads

**_NOTE:_**Finally got this posted!. I'm a bit more behind on my chapters than usual because I spent time doing some good deeds this week. That sapped my writing time. Hopefully, I'll get back on schedule, but I might not and even if I don't I'll still get a chapter up a week, just not sure what day of the week.

Let's see we have some more smut, because I like smut :D and then we have plenty of angsty goodness and a small crisis for Dani, but you'll need to read, the girl needs to figure her shit out soon, she's killing me ;)

On a side note: I hope all you USA citizens of legal age (and everyone reading should be of legal age) voted today as this was posted on election day 2012. I don't care who you voted for. I'd hope you voted in favor equality for all, women's rights and marriage equity, but if not you have that right and I'll defend it with my dying breath. We all have the right to choose who and what we believe in and that is what makes our country great. I don't have to believe what you believe to defend your right to stand up and scream it from the roof tops just as long as you give me the same opportunity.

Side, side note: For anyone who is interested in a piece of non-fanfiction, loosely associated to this story, I have a piece on the fictionpress side posted under the same user name SciFiRN. It's about Ronnie and her partner Angie and since there is no mention of any other Nec. Roughness character I posted it there. NOW, please be aware this story involves femslash and d/s elements, so if that's not your thing you may want to avoid it completely. Otherwise, feel free to read at your own risk and let me know what you think. The title is: What's Inside Me is Invisible to Most

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**Crosswords in the Morning and Crossroads in the Afternoon**

It was the thumping up the stairs and a thud that woke her. She sat up, looked at the clock and jumped out of bed, startled. She pulled open her door to find her son in a pair of sweat pants, a sweaty t-shirt and his hair sticking to his forehead.

"Ray Jay?" She half whispered at him. "What are you doing up at seven thirty on Sunday morning and why are you so sweaty?"

He glared at her and wiped his forehead as he pushed open the bathroom door. "Ask Nico," he snorted, "He's the one who dragged my ass out of bed at o dark thirty this morning and said we were going jogging and I didn't have a say in the matter." He pulled his shirt over his head. "Guess it's a new routine." He made air-quotes around the word routine. "For the Sundays he's here, part of my drug kingpin rehab." He rolled his eyes. "I don't like it mom."

Dani tried not to smile. "It's not going to hurt you Ray Jay. It's exercise."

"On Sunday. At seven in the morning. It's interrupting my sleep."

She crossed her arms and shook her head. "Ray Jay, you get up earlier for school."

"So, I should be allowed to sleep in on Sunday. It's sacred." He was whining now. "Come on mom…please, do something."

She shook her head. "You can sleep in at your father's and you can sleep in on Saturday. I don't see a problem. Shower and go back to sleep if you want, what's the big deal?"

He looked at her like he hadn't thought about that. "Huh…yeah, I could do that. Cool." He nodded and disappeared into the bathroom.

Dani shook her head at him and turned back to her room, but caught the scent of coffee and decided to grab her sweater instead. She pulled it on and headed down the stairs. She found Nico at the counter sipping coffee. He was wearing a pair of grey sweats and a Hawks t-shirt. He was leaning over the Sunday paper.

He looked up when he heard Dani. He smiled. "Did Ray Jay wake you?"

"Yes. You made him run?" She slid beside him and noticed his hair was damp, but not sweaty and he smelled clean. He'd obviously showered. "You showered?"

He smiled and pressed a kiss to Dani's forehead when she bent over him. "We jogged two miles out and then I raced him back in. I won. I showered upstairs and was done before he even got home." He held up his mug. "You want a cup?"

She slid from his side. "Yes, but I'll get it, stay there." She moved to the counter and fixed a cup to her liking with cream and a touch of sugar. She moved back to the island and sat beside him. "You're doing the New York Times puzzle in ink?"

"I always do the Sunday one and yes, in ink. It's cheating if you use pencil, everyone knows that." He gave her a stern look and then winked. He moved the puzzle so she could see it and scooted his stool a bit closer so his shoulder was touching hers. "How'd you sleep?"

She leaned against him. "Not too bad. I would've slept better with you beside me." She took her a sip from her mug as she looked over the puzzle as he filled in several blanks. "I Can't See Clearly Now, ninety-seven." Dani pointed at the paper. "Ninety-seven across," She took another sip and nodded when Nico put the pen to the page.

He quickly filled in three more blanks and then set the pen down. He looked over at the clock with a frown and picked up his coffee mug. "I'm off my game."

Dani mumbled under her breath. "Off your game my ass you basically completed the entire puzzle in what under an hour?"

Nico bit back a smile and took another sip of his coffee. He cleared his throat and chose to change the subject. "I had a long talk with Juliette last night. She was up after everyone went to sleep. She does that a lot." He turned in his seat to face Dani. "She came down to the office. I knew she would, so I had the door open."

"What did she want?" Dani had a pretty good idea, but she asked anyway.

"To apologize, to cry and talk about Marshall. She wanted to know how I felt about her." He sighed heavily and put his cup down. He took Dani's hand. "She's struggling with what to feel. She's pissed as hell at her father and wants to hate him, but misses him at the same time which is confusing her. She told me she was sorry for fucking up and letting me and you down. She doesn't want us to give up on her…to kick her out or disown her. She doesn't want either of us to let her go like Marshall or Gabby did."

Dani squeezed his hand. "God Nico, I know you promised her we wouldn't, and I know why she'd think that, but I'd never do that her and I know you wouldn't either. I know you never really let her go even when Marshall was making you."

He smiled at her. "You're right and I told her that. She felt better." He frowned and sighed again.

"Why do I think there's a big 'but' coming?" She let go of his hand and wrapped both hands around her cup.

He nodded. "Because you're right, she's still confused Dani. Confused about her feelings and she tried to kiss me. When I wouldn't let her and held her away, she started crying and eventually, she fell asleep in my arms. I carried her to bed." He picked up his empty mug and moved to the counter to get a refill. He returned with the pot and refilled Dani's cup as well. "I thought she'd figured that out, but she was going on about something she talked to Lindsay about." He sat back down and rested his hand on his palm as he looked at Dani. "This is beyond me Dani and I just don't know how to deal with it."

She leaned in and wrapped her arm around his shoulder. "You are dealing with it and you did the right thing. You didn't walk away from her. You stayed with her, made sure she felt safe and even carried her to bed, but you set a clear boundary. She just needs time and consistency." She kissed him softly on the lips, pulled back and looked him in the eye. "You're exactly what she needs."

He rested his head against her forehead. "I don't feel like it. I feel lost and completely inadequate."

Dani chuckled and palmed his cheek. "Well, she's pretty much looking to you like a you like a father…give or take," she rolled her eyes and snorted, "and trust me, I've been a mother for almost eighteen yeahrs now and there are days, hell weeks, when I still feel completely inadequate. So, get used to it."

He stood and pulled Dani into his arms as he did. He stood there, his chin resting on the top of her head for a moment or two. He savored her closeness, the intimacy of sharing space and time. Times like this were rare in his life. He'd only shared his life on this level with two other people and now he wanted to share it with Dani and he hoped she wanted to share it with him. He took a breath and pulled back to look at her. He could see the questions on her face and before she asked he caught her lips.

Dani wanted to ask what the hug was about. Nico didn't strike her as the hugging type. Not just the hug in the kitchen for no reason type anyway, but when he pulled back and she looked up to ask he was suddenly kissing her and she forgot the question. God, the man could kiss. His lips were firm and he took control but didn't force anything.

He knew exactly when to push and then back off and he understood how to use his tongue and teeth. His hand and fingers teased her jaw and neck and just along her hairline. He tilted her head at just the right angles. His tongue danced and played with hers, stroked and pulled back, teased hers to play along and she was gasping and grinding against him in no time.

When he finally lifted his lips from hers he smiled at her because she gasped his name like a prayer. "I love it when you say my name that way." He brushed a wayward strand of hair from her eyes. "Stop doubting yourself. You're a wonderful mother Dani." He didn't resist the urge to run his hands down her back and cup the curve of her ass. "Ray Jay and Lindsay are great kids because of you." He pulled her close and kissed her nose.

She shook her head. "Stop talking about the kids…" She smiled at him and looped her hands around his shoulders. "It's distracting." Her fingers threaded into the hair where it curled soft against his neck. She glanced at the clock. "We still have some time." She smiled up at him and pressed against him. "You don't have to leave until ten thirty. It's just a little after eight…"

"Are you trying to seduce me Dr. Santino?" He took three steps backward, taking her with him toward her office. He pressed a trail of kisses down her neck as he went.

Her head fell back with a soft moan. "God yes and it better be working because if it doesn't I'm raiding the remote for batteries."

He laughed outright, still moving them toward the office, but at a quicker pace. "Hmm, desperate this morning?" He pressed a hand against her belly and slid it lower.

"Stop teasing me..." She pulled from his arms when they reached her office and pushed the door closed and locked it behind them. "Yes, very desperate." She untied her sweater and dropped it where she stood before she pulled her knee length nightshirt over her head. She wasn't wearing any panties.

"Shit." Nico stared at her and then swallowed hard. "My god, you are so damn sexy…come here." He held out his hand, but didn't wait and took a step to meet her halfway. He pulled her against him and crushed his lips to hers. "I can't get enough of you Danielle. You're an addiction." He gasped out and between kisses, let her pull his t-shirt over his head.

She kissed his neck and throat and smiled as she scraped her teeth over his nipples. She knew what she wanted. She dropped to her knees and pulled his sweats down as she did. His erection was already tenting the front. "It's a good thing I'm an addiction specialist then." She grasped the base of his cock and didn't hesitate to take him into her mouth. She swirled her tongue around his tip and then let him slide deep into her throat, she fought against the urge to gag and swallowed around him instead.

His head fell back and his hands gripped her hair. She had moved so fast he hadn't had been able to steel himself against the sensation and it almost overwhelmed him. "Oh my god Dani…" She was bobbing on his cock now and he gathered her hair to watch. Her lips were stretched around him and when he moved her hair her eyes instinctively found his and heat spiraled through him. "You don't have to…Please…" he tried to guide her head from him, but she shook her head and made a negative sound in her throat. The vibration made him moan and he saw that this was something she wanted to do for him.

She smiled when he moaned and she hummed again and when her fingers teased his balls she felt his legs quiver and his sac pulled tighter to his body. She knew he didn't want her to do this for him, but this was something she wanted to give him. She actually had a dream about it and it had made her so hot and wet she couldn't let the thought go. She watched his face, felt him fight the urge to thrust against her and then he stiffened.

His voice was strangled. "Dani…god…" He held her head and with some difficulty thrust shallowly into her mouth as he came.

Dani struggled to swallow everything and pulled back when she couldn't manage all of it, some ran to her chest and she gave Nico a lopsided smile and started to wipe at her neck and chest with her hand only to find herself pressed back against the floor by Nico's body. "Wha…" She was silenced by a devastating kiss that took her breath away and made her want the man she just pleasured even more than she had before. She gasped when his mouth moved lower.

He knelt between her legs and smiled at her as he licked his lips. "God, I really don't love that taste." He winked at her. "I don't know how you girls do that."

She snorted and lifted her foot from the floor. "I thought you said you didn't mind kissing after…"

He gave her a rueful smile. "I never said I liked it, I simply said it was something I appreciated in a woman because it meant she just did something to please me."

Dani smiled at him, "I guess that makes sense." She traced her toe over his shoulder and down his chest. "I doubt I would enjoy doing what you're about to do."

His eyebrow rose. "And what exactly am I about to do?"

Her foot moved back up his chest and she rested her heel on his shoulder and she lifted the other to the opposite shoulder now. She reached behind her to the chair and pulled down two throw pillows. She handed them to him. "Well, I'm hoping you're about to return a favor…because if not I'm going to be seriously pissed off all day."

Nico took the pillows and waited for her lift her hips, when she did he slid them under. "Hmm, I see." He traced a line from between her breasts to her navel and watched her shiver. "Why did you just do that for me Dani?" He looked her in the eye. His two fingers slowly moving south.

She swallowed. "I wanted to. I wanted to make you happy. Give you something just for you. You do it for me all the time and because I had a dream about it and it made me hot. The thought about having you in my mouth until you came…" Her eyes drifted shut and she felt herself clench and go hot and cold. "It still makes me hot."

His fingers circled her clit just then and then slid lower. He let his index finger slide inside. He had so much he wanted to say, but he couldn't…he'd already told her he wouldn't. He swallowed his words; his feelings and instead he repositioned himself and bent his head to taste her.

There was something in his eyes just before his mouth was on her and then it was lost. Dani wished she could get it back, but it was gone and then she hated herself because she just didn't care. She couldn't. She couldn't care when he was making her feel things she couldn't remember ever feeling before. God…really, had she always been able to feel like this? She arched upward and her hands found their way into his hair. "You can't be real…"

He couldn't help but laugh against her. Short bursts of air, followed by long laps with his tongue the entire length of her slit. He flicked her clit with his tongue over and over and thrust his middle and index fingers inside as he did. He used his left hand to touch her as he pleased. His fingertips lightly brushed over her thighs, low on her belly and breast. He kept her off guard. Concentrating mostly on his mouth and right hand, but he knew what he was doing and the extra sensation was important. He teased his nails down her inner thighs and brushed his fingertips across her ass, letting them drag through the slick wetness that gathered there. He was surprised at her low moan, but she didn't give him a chance to pursue his new information.

Dani was shaking and she was fighting the urge to scream and press her heels through Nico's back. She bit her lip and tossed her head. His mouth and fingers were pushing her closer to orgasm and then every time she was close, she felt something new that set off another chain of sensation and her body would head off in that direction chasing the new sensation down. Then the orgasm would build again, this time stronger and then he'd do something new again and she'd hover.

She was starting to get to the point of no return and she knew it. Her breathing was hitched and labored, sweat beaded on her forehead and ran between her breasts and her body was strung tight. God, whatever he was doing with his hands was driving her crazy and then his fingers teased over the curve of her ass, his fingers grazing sensitive, barely touched flesh, in a light feathery touch as his tongue pressed flat against her clit moving back and forth while his fingers continued to move hard and deep inside her. Her head fell back and she moaned, "Nico…oh fuck…" She gripped his hair and bucked against his face as she came. She had no words, she had no thoughts; she just fell apart.

He didn't stop at first. He kept his fingers inside, but kept them still. Her body clenched around them so tightly he actually wasn't sure he could move them, but his tongue moved slowly over her until her fingers released his hair and her heels weren't pressed through his back and out through to his chest. He lifted his head and reached for his t-shirt. He wiped his mouth with it. "Damn." He winked at her. "I think I have bruises on the inside of my ribcage."

She had collapsed onto the floor and her legs had fallen from his shoulders, but he was still between them. She opened her eyes lazily and smiled. She held her hand out to him and when he took it she tugged him toward her.

He grabbed the pillows from under her hips, flipped them over and tucked one under her head, and then settled down on his side beside her. He rested his head on his hand, elbow on the other pillow as he looked down at her. "Feel better?"

"If better is a big pile of jello, then yes." She smiled up at him. "Sorry about the bruises." She reached up and behind his neck. She pulled him down for a kiss. "You taste like sex."

He smirked. "I taste like you." He kissed her again, a deeper, longer kiss and when he pulled back he pressed his half erect cock to her hip. "And in case you can't tell, I like the taste of you."

Dani rolled to her side and let her hand drift over him. "One day, we need to spend an entire day in bed. You and me and food." She stroked him. "I wonder how many times we can go?"

He growled and bit at her ear. "You need to stop, today is not that day."

She let go of him and pressed her nose to his chest. "I know, but I can still dream." She stretched. "I am never going to be able to unsee us having sex in this room you know."

His hands absently moved over her curves and he glanced around the office. They'd had sex on the couch, over the couch and on the floor now. He smiled. "Is that going to be a problem?"

She shook her head. "It might be distracting, but it's not a problem. No."

"You distract me and you aren't even with me." He pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "I'm going to make you breakfast, after I wash up a bit. Why don't you go shower."

She wanted to tell him to shower with her and then she realized she sounded like a lovesick teenager. What was wrong with her? She nodded. "Okay, but I won't be long. I won't dry my hair. I'll just shower, dress and come help you with breakfast."

He sat up and helped her do the same. He gathered their clothes and dressed while she did. "Go." He kissed her quickly and then opened the door. "Before I change my mind." He smiled at her and playfully swatted her ass when she went by.

Once Dani was gone Nico washed up and changed into dark jeans and button up. He was rolling up the sleeves as he checked out the fridge for ingredients when Lindsay came into the kitchen. He smiled. "Good morning."

"Oh, hey I didn't know you were up." She gave him an odd look. "Can I help you find something?"

He pulled out two dozen eggs and then opened the produce drawer. "Well, I'm going to make omelets, so how about a pan." He said as he picked out mushrooms, onions, peppers and tomatoes. Then he added some cheese, butter and milk to the collection on the counter before shutting the door and locating a bowl and whisk.

Lindsay set the proper pan on the stove along with a spatula and then pulled a cutting board and knife from the counter by the sink. "Slices, fine chop, whaddya want?" She held up the knife with a smile and then she started washing the mushrooms, peppers and tomatoes.

Nico watched her for a second or two. "The mushrooms need to be finely sliced. Just dice the tomatoes if you don't mind. I'll get the onions and peppers, because I'm going to sauté them first."

"Cool." Lindsay dried the peppers and handed them off to him. "So, you cook omelets too?"

He smiled. "Yeah, omelets too and you obviously can chop veggies."

"It's my job, always has been." She dried the mushrooms and sliced out their stems. Then she laid them out and quickly sliced them down; one after the next. She went to work on the tomatoes next. She put the diced pieces in a bowl and then looked to Nico who already had the peppers and onions in a shallow pan and some butter. "I'm glad you soften them up. Nothing worse than raw veg in your omelet."

"I totally agree." He looked at her from the corner of his eye as he stirred the onion and pepper. He just wanted them soft. "What were you and Juliette talking about last night? She was pretty upset."

Lindsay moved so she could see Nico's face. She leaned against the counter and crossed her arms. "It was my fault and I didn't mean to upset her, sorry." She shrugged. "I asked if she had a boyfriend. I mean I figured she did or had had one recently anyway, but she told me she never had and well I guess I found that strange. I mean look at her."

Nico had looked at her, but he didn't see what everyone else did. He still saw a little girl. Yes, a beautiful one, but to him she was still that little girl who wanted him to pick her up and take on piggyback rides. He knew she wasn't innocent, but that's what he saw. "I know and men love Juliette, trust me."

She snorted. "Yeah, she told me. Only Juliette doesn't love herself or her, excuse my mouth, bitch of a mother, never taught her to make a guy wait even for a second date to see if they're worth being with." She bit her lip. "If you give him everything, what's he got left to wait for?"

"If he loves you and you give him everything, no matter when that everything is, he'll be there the next day and the next yeahr because everything is what he wants." He looked at Lindsay. "It's not always so cut and dry. Love is complicated and so is life. Sex can make it even more complicated, which is why it's good to wait, but just because it happens on the first date doesn't mean it can't last forever." He stirred his sauté and removed it from the heat. He added a pinch of salt and set it on the back burner. His mind was on earlier, on him and Dani and how he felt. His voice was suddenly far away. "Sometimes, sex is the simplest form of emotion. Sometimes, when there are no words, actions speak."

Dani stood in the hall. She hadn't meant to listen to his conversation with Lindsay, but then she just had and she wasn't sure if she exactly agreed with Nico's approach. Then he seemed to make sense, even if she'd rather he push more for waiting. It was the last bit that she wondered about the most. It didn't really seem to go with the rest of the conversation. She felt it was about her and then what did it mean. She pushed the thought away, because what it meant was something she didn't want to acknowledge.

She moved into the kitchen with a smile, "Something smells good." She knew she'd missed parts of their conversation because they were laughing about something when she walked in.

"Mom." Lindsay walked over and hugged her. "Nico's making omelets for breakfast."

"Really?" She glanced over at him. "That's nice, thank you."

"My pleasure," He pointed to the coffee pot. "There's coffee, I think anyway. Most of it might be gone, so we might need to make more."

Dani picked up the pot. It was just about gone so she did make another pot. Juliette would want some and so would Lindsay and she would at least drink one more cup. She looked around, but Nico must have already taken care of her mug because only his was out beside the Time's puzzle. She smiled. "So, you need to be at the field when?"

He looked up from his whisking. "Noon. I need to talk to Juliette again. There's supposed to be a special memorial for Marshall during halftime. Gabrielle will be there and the media will expect Juliette to show too." He sighed. "Dani, she doesn't want to go and but she really should. I talked with her about it once and she totally shut down, maybe you can talk to her. If you go and stay in the box with her, hell you and the kids, all of you should go. Gabby will have her entourage, there's no reason Juliette can't have her own. After halftime, you could bring her home."

He looked to Lindsay. "Everything?" He held up the whisked eggs and waited for her to answer. When she nodded he poured the eggs into the ready pan and when the eggs were ready he added the veg and cheese.

Dani sighed. "I'll talk to her and yes, I think she should go because she should honor her father and he loved the team. I wish Gabrielle didn't have to be there." She pulled a face.

"I smell food." Ray Jay's voice came from the stairs. "Real food and damn I'm hungry because someone dragged me out of bed this morning."

Nico shook his head and glanced at Dani. "It's like Grand Central in here."

"Yep, welcome to teenagers and food." She heard another door and pointed up the stairs. "He must have woke up the last one."

"Nope, she was up. I heard her in the bathroom." Ray Jay pulled a mug from the cabinet, poured himself some coffee, added cream and took a sip. "Ahh, caffeine; do your thing."

Nico folded Lindsay's omelet onto her plate and looked at Ray Jay. "We don't have any meat, but we have veggies, what would you like in yours?" He wiped out the pan and whisked more eggs and seasoning together with some milk.

"Mushrooms and onions are fine and cheese," He gave Nico a stern look. "Don't skimp on the cheese."

"Of course not, that would be a sin." He rolled his eyes and turned back to the stove just as Juliette joined them in the kitchen. He glanced over at her. "Hey, yours in next." He pointed to the coffee pot. "Coffee's there and cream is in the fridge."

She didn't speak, just stumbled to the coffee pot, pulled down a mug and went through the steps to get caffeine into her system. Then she sat at the counter with the coffee under a curtain of her hair.

Dani looked to Nico with concern. "Is she…"

He shook his head. "She's normally like this in the morning, just accept it."

Dani nodded, "She needs her meds."

"Let me get this one on the plate." He waited until the eggs were done and then folded it onto Ray Jay's plate and set the pan to the side. "Hang on baby, I'll get your meds and you'll feel better soon." He squeezed her shoulder as he went by and she lifted her head.

"Thanks." She looked up at the other people in the kitchen. "So, omelets huh? He can cook the hell out an egg."

Lindsay nodded and took another bite. "I hate to say this mom, but they're better than yours."

Ray Jay was halfway through his. "Uh-huh, good." He took a sip of coffee. "Really."

Nico was back to hear that. "Thanks." He handed Juliette her meds and she excused herself to put on her patch. "I'm glad you like them. Juliette, I'm making yours now." He said as she slipped past him to the half bath in the hall.

"I'll be right back." She pointed to the patch. "You know what I like."

He nodded and put the pan back on the burner to heat as he whisked more eggs.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Dani sat in her chair in her office with Juliette on the couch across from her. It was a little after noon and Nico had been gone since ten thirty. Everyone had showered and dressed and Dani had suggested that they have an informal session. She was a little surprised that Juliette agreed so readily. So, now she sat and waited for the girl to talk; it didn't take too long.

"I didn't sleep well last night." She looked around the room. She had her feet curled under her and her arms wrapped around a needlepoint throw pillow. "I came down here to talk to Nico."

"What did you talk about?" Dani picked up her tea and sipped. She was keeping the session casual. She hadn't brought up the appearance at the game yet.

She shrugged. "I told him I was sorry for fucking up with my meds." She shifted and glanced out the window. "I miss dad, I was sad and lonely." She looked over to Dani. "Lindsay was talking to me last night. She was telling me she's never had sex."

A weight Dani never knew she carried lifted from her shoulders. She blinked. "Okay, and did that upset you?"

"If I ask you something personal will you answer it?"

Dani sat forward. "Juliette this is a therapy session, this is for you…"

"Fuck, nevermind then…you're just like all the others." Juliette threw the pillow and crossed her arms over her chest.

She sighed. She'd lost her and if she didn't do something… Dani moved to the couch and took the girl's hand. "Juliette, look at me." When the girl finally did, and it took a few long seconds where Dani doubted she would, Dani continued. "I'm not used to this anymore than you are." She waved her hand around the room. "This room usually means I'm in Dr. Dani mode. With you, that's a little different and I'm crossing lines I'm not used to crossing. I'm at a crossroads." She took a breath. "I have to decide if I stick to what I've been taught and what I think is right, or do I make a turn and go with what I feel is right…with what my heart is telling me. You and Nico don't fit into what I know. If I stick to what I know then neither of you should be here. I shouldn't be your therapist and I shouldn't be so close to you and I definitely shouldn't be…"

"In love with Nico."

"What?" Dani's head shot up with a gasp.

Juliette gave her a sly smile. "Please, it's more than obvious. You two are pathetic."

"I don't love him, not that way." Dani shook her head. "I care about him a lot and he's my friend." She looked at Juliette. "What makes you think I'm in love with him? What makes you think he loves me that way?"

"First, he loves you so much it's killing him and don't tell me you don't see it. He's loved you for a long time. I knew it the first time I saw him with you." She looked up at Dani from behind her hair. "I remember because I teased him about it and he threatened me. He told me if I said another word he'd cancel the emergency credit card he'd given me." She smiled. "That's serious shit right there."

Dani kept shaking her head. "You're wrong Juliette. I mean, sure he's attracted to me. He enjoys my company and he was hurting. He wants someone in his life to spend time with, but he doesn't love me Juliette." She shook her head again. "And yeah, I'm attracted to him and I like his company. I just came out of a relationship and I'm confused, but none of that is the same thing as being in love."

"Who are you trying to convince? And you're lying to yourself about your own feelings too. It's written all over your face. Every time you look at him or say his name, or hell, touch him it makes my belly clench it's so fucking romantic and I wasn't kidding when I saw you two together on his couch." She made a puke face and rolled her eyes. "It was hot because it was real and you could feel the emotion in the room. It about knocked me out."

Dani gave her a blank stare. "I don't know what to say."

"Don't say anything then. Just accept what I'm telling you. One of the things we talked about last night was you. You came up because I tried to kiss him again, which I need to stop doing. God, I keep repeating patterns. Anyway, he stopped me. I asked if it was because of you and he said no, it was because it was wrong and even if you two weren't together it wouldn't happen.

"So, I said, 'but you loving her isn't helping my cause' and he laughed and told me I didn't have a cause. Then he went on to tell me that you weren't ready to hear him say, 'I love you' yet. Why I don't know because those are words I can't wait to hear from a man." She wiped her eyes now. "Fuck, your daughter doesn't give up her body and boys say they love her. I give them everything in every way imaginable and never once has one of them said it to me. And then there's you."

She paused and pulled a tissue from the box on the table by the couch. She wiped her nose. "The one man I'd kill to hear those words from wants to say them to you and you won't listen to them. I love Nico and he loves me, but not that way and you know what? I'll take it, but you can have more. He wants to give you everything Dani." She took a breath and when she looked up at Dani there was glimmer of anger in her eyes. "Do you know how pissed that makes me."

Dani shook her head. "What makes you angry?"

"What makes me angry?" She sat forward, rested her elbows on her knees and glared at Dani. "Really? It makes me angry that you're turning down a man like that. You know he doesn't exactly offer those parts of himself to just anyone. He doesn't open himself up to a chance to get hurt like this often and he's wide open Dani and you're just doing what? Waiting? What exactly are you waiting for? Each day he waits hurts him, you know that, not as much as if you turn him down, but it's hurting him. God, are you really this thick?"

Dani sat there and struggled to process what she heard on several levels. There was a lot of information, not just revelation about Nico's feelings toward her, but also things about Juliette's past and her feelings. Then there was information about Lindsay. Mostly, there were her own feelings, which she knew she needed to work through. She also knew now wasn't the time. Hell, she didn't want to deal with them at all and she knew that was the problem.

"Wow…okay." Dani rubbed her forehead. She needed to refocus, get control of this session. She was shaking on the inside. She swallowed and took a steady breath. "Do you still want to ask me a personal question?"

Juliette snorted. "Sure, if you want to play that way, we can play that way. You're as bad as everyone else. Change the subject and avoid the problem." She sat back and watched Dani out of the corner of her eye. "But fine, I was going to ask; how old were you when you first had sex?"

Dani sighed, she knew taking on Juliette as a client in any way was going to be difficult and she was right. She was just too close to her and to the situation in general. She looked at the girl and decided that she'd treat her like she would if this was Lindsay asking and she honestly had no problem answering this question on that level. "The kids' father was the only man  
I'd slept with until I got divorced and I was seventeen the first time."

"Huh." She sat back and cocked her head to the side, watching Dani. "So you've like only been with like what a couple of guys?"

Dani knew she blushed, but she'd answer, even though she probably wouldn't share that information with her daughter. "Three, including Nico and my ex-husband, I fooled around pretty heavy with a fourth guy, but we never actually sealed the deal."

She played with her hair and decided to let Dani off the hook for the moment. She stared at the pattern on the couch. "The first time I had sex I was fifteen. He was almost eighteen and it was horrible. I couldn't wait for it to be over." She glanced to Dani. "The second time was his brother and it was right after the first guy, he was my age. It didn't hurt, but it wasn't any better and he was done in like fifteen seconds." She sighed. "I couldn't figure out what the big deal was, but then they bought me shit and that was kinda nice so I figured it was worth it."

Dani needed to start working on keeping her heart in Kevlar around this girl because she never knew when something Juliette told her was going to break it. She put her hand on Juliette's shoulder. "I'm sorry. It shouldn't have been that way Juliette. I mean my first time, wasn't perfect and it did hurt a little, but I was happy about it and Ray tried hard to make it good for me." She smiled and rolled her eyes. "He didn't succeed, but he tried. It took us both about three or four times to get the hang of it. I mean neither of us had a clue, but eventually we got there."

"Oh, it got better for me. I mean the older kid was good in bed and he actually got me off the next time." She smiled when Dani made an odd face. "Sorry, was that too blunt for you?"

Dani shook her head. "No. You say what you need to say. I'll get over myself. How did you see sexuality in the house growing up?"

"You mean like, did mom and dad snuggle on the couch like you and Nico?" She laughed. "Hell no, they fought and screamed. There was never any affection between them and barely with me. Dad did some with me. Nico and my bodyguards mostly with me, though. Mom had lovers. Mostly men, sometimes women and I saw them with mom and yes, I saw Nico with mom at times." She pulled her hair into a knot and tied it with an elastic from her wrist. "Mom was always in charge and she ordered people into and out of her bed like she ordered pizza, even dad. He'd be in the main house for weeks, then he'd be in the guest house and some twenty-three year old model with abs of steel and sexy blue eyes would be crashing in the guest room and waltzing through the kitchen at two am bare ass naked." She shrugged. "Now, if she didn't think I wasn't going to sample, then she's crazy."

Dani couldn't keep the smile off her face because well, Gabrielle Pittman deserved everything she got, even though she really didn't condone Juliette's casual take on sex. "How many times did you do that? Sleep with your mother's boyfriends?"

Juliette snorted. "Please, they weren't boyfriends. They were toys, rent boys and girls, don't forget the girls. Mom was sure to point those out to you and Nico to prove her point about how disgusting I am, and sure I slept with them, but that didn't keep her from taking them right back to her bed." She shrugged. "And I don't know how many times, whenever one of them blew my skirt up...or I was pissed at her about something."

"So do you see sex as a form of power? Do you still use it that way? To get control and get what you want? To manipulate?"

"I guess, yeah."

"Is that any better than the men who use you to satisfy the need of their body? Aren't they basically doing the same thing…aren't you both doing that? They took what they wanted and you, well you got drugs, some attention, gifts or maybe, just maybe you might get loved."

She blinked at Dani. "So, I use them and they're using me and we're both just fucking each other over then." She scratched her arms in agitation, then stopped with a frustrated groan. "Okay, so how the hell do I break the cycle then?"

Dani smiled and took her hand. "First, you do what you just did and acknowledge that there is a cycle. So, now you know you have a problem. Second, you have to learn to love yourself. If you don't feel you're worthy to be loved, you won't let yourself be loved. Third, you need to stop devaluing what it is to make love. It isn't just pleasure. It's sharing a deeper piece of yourself." She mulled over Nico's earlier words and let them really sink into her consciousness now; the one's he'd shared with Lindsay. "It doesn't always matter when you share that piece of yourself, but it's how you do it. It's acknowledging that it's not just friction between bodies. It's making a connection with someone else. It's sharing a deeper piece of what's inside. The French have called the orgasm la petite mort."

"The little death."

"Yes and that little bit of dying, of letting go, you do with someone else, that bit of your soul or life essence, whatever you want to call it, that bit that lets go mingles with the other person. It's what makes sex special and better than just masturbation. Sure, that feels good, but sharing it with someone else is so much better when you can really let go."

"I've never had that." She pulled her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. "Sex is always about getting off or getting it done so I can get what I need." She turned her head away from Dani and kept talking. "I'm not proud of it, but I'm not ashamed of it either. I mean sex, is sex. It feels good or it doesn't. It's like food, some of it is gourmet and some of it is McDonalds and even me getting myself off does the same thing." She made a disgusted sound. "And at least then I'm guaranteed to cum." She sighed and looked at Dani. "I never once had a connection with a partner I slept with. I never even came close. I don't know why." She wiped her eyes because there were tears on her lashes. "Maybe there's something broken in me."

Dani wished could round up every man who ever touched her and kick them in the balls because they'd used her. She wanted to kick Marshall too and slap Gabrielle at the same time. She wiped the tears from Juliette's cheek. "Juliette, there's nothing broken inside of you. You just need to learn to listen to your heart and start seeing in yourself what the people who love you see."

Juliette was quiet for a several minutes and then suddenly she moved and wrapped her arms around Dani. She hugged her almost desperately. "I want you know something." She pulled back with a sniff and looked at her. "I told you that you were my family now and I meant it. You and Nico, both of you are the only people who ever treated me like you cared and expected nothing from me and maybe now your kids. I like them and they're growing on me too. None of you have any reason to take care of me or be nice to me. You barely know me." She wiped her eyes when tears clouded them. "I'm pretty sure you care about me because of how you feel about Nico and you can argue with me all you want about how it's not love." She shrugged. "I don't give a fuck what you call it. I know in my heart that he'd do anything for you, just like he would for me and he doesn't do that for just anyone. That's for people he cares about; people he loves."

She grabbed Dani's hand. "Don't take what he does for you lightly. I mean it Dani. It's a big deal that he let you in. He let you see him, his home and who he really is. You know more about him than any person on this planet other than dad. You could hurt him. Maybe even destroy him." She looked her in the eye. "I like you, but I'm warning you, don't break his heart or you will see a side of me you've never seen before. I was raised by Gabrielle Pittman and I know exactly how to be that daughter."

"I appreciate your love and loyalty to Nico." She realized she actually did. "And I have no intention of hurting him or breaking his heart in any way. He's always been there for me and I'm thankful for it." She tried not to think about Juliette's words. She didn't want to focus on her own feelings. She needed to stay focused on Juliette.

Dani took a deep breath. "Speaking of your mother; today is the memorial for your father at the game and your mother is going to be there."

"Fuck her." She crossed her arms and sat back on the couch with a frustrated sigh. "She hates that team, she should just fucking leave it alone."

"But she's going to be there." Dani sensed that Juliette wanted to go. "She probably thinks you aren't going."

"Well, she can fuck off. Dad would want me there. He loved that team and it was our thing more than her thing. She doesn't even know how the game is played. Sure, she knows who's sexy and who has the biggest paycheck, but she couldn't tell a post from a slant or a quarterback from a cornerback." She was angry. "You're going to come with me right?"

Dani nodded. "If you want, yes. Nico suggested bringing Linds and Ray Jay too, he's going to leave tickets at the window. He said your mother would have her entourage, so you should too." She smiled.

"Mom will have half a dozen people or more with her. Her lawyer, a friend or two, possibly her new lover, if she has one now, and who knows who else, but there will be people because she'll want people to see her cry and to pretend she's a grieving ex-widow."

Dani glanced at the clock. It was almost one. "Let me call Nico and let him know we're coming then."

"Okay. Are we done here then?" When Dani nodded she sighed. "Good and one thing. Don't tell him I told you all that. Last night I swore I wouldn't tell you any of the stuff he told me about loving you and then I blew it." She stood. "But you two are idiots. Just talk to each other, will you?"

She nodded and hit send. "I'll work on it and we need to take you shopping, so don't go too far."

"Careles."

"Nico, it's Dani."

"Is everything okay? Juliette?"

"Is fine, everything is fine. She's agreed to come this afternoon, so all of us will be there."

"Thank you Danielle. I owe you." His voice was low, almost seductive.

"No, you don't owe me anything. I'm going to take Juliette shopping, she needs some things before she goes in tomorrow."

"Use the business card and I'll pay you back."

She rolled her eyes. "You'll do no such thing. I owe you too much already."

"Dani."

"Nico" She used the same tone he did back at him.

"Fine, I'll have a car at your house at three. You should be here by kickoff."

"I'll see you at some point?" She asked hopeful.

"You usually do at the games, don't you?"

She sighed. "Yes."

"Bye baby."

"Bye, Nico." She hung up and wished she could call him back, just to hear him call her baby again.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Lindsay and Juliette got along very well together while they shopped. Dani felt Juliette treated Lindsay like a younger sister, after all the age difference wasn't that much. Sometimes, Dani noticed it was Lindsay who acted with more maturity, but it was obvious where Juliette's wisdom was.

She dismissed certain boy's interest in Lindsay with an easy wave of her hand and a few words. Something Dani knew would not have come well from her. Dani also couldn't argue with her assessments of the different boys and what they wanted. The two college boys sitting in the café were obviously only interested in Juliette and Lindsay as sexual partners, though Lindsay wasn't sure about it, Juliette assured her they were being valued as nothing more than meat.

It was the boy behind the counter that Juliette pointed out to Lindsay in the shop later that made Dani realize how perceptive the girl really was.

"He's cute Linds and he likes you." Juliette said as she refolded a sweater. "He likes your socks."

Lindsay's eyebrows pulled together. "What? Of all the odd things to mention, why socks?" She giggled at the older girl.

She shrugged. "How would I know, but I'm telling you, it's the socks that he's digging and compliment his phone. It's the new Galaxy, so he's a geek. He'll think it's cool that you like it." Juliette had an armful of clothes. "Come on, if you aren't buying anything I am." She grabbed the other girl's arm. She smiled at the clerk. "Hey. I need this stuff."

The kid nodded and Juliette. "Cool," but he smiled at Lindsay. "So how about you, are you avoiding commercialism or just living vicariously through your friend here?" He asked as he started ringing up Juliette's purchases, his eyes still on Lindsay.

Lindsay smiled. "I hate to break it to you, but your shop isn't in my usual budget." She frowned at the price tag on a sequined tank by the register. "Yeah, definitely not in my budget."

Juliette laughed. "If you like it, I'll buy it for you." She pulled it from the rack and held it up to Lindsay. She glanced at the kid behind the counter. "What do you think…" She checked his name tag. "Brian?"

He looked up and shook his head. "It's not her, makes her look like she's trying too hard, but that makes everyone look like they're trying too hard." His eyes lingered a second and then he went back to his work.

Lindsay glared at Juliette, who was pointing at her phone. She rolled her eyes and stepped to the counter. Brian's phone was by the register. "Is that the new Galaxy?" She put her hand on the counter by the phone, but didn't touch it.

Brian looked up at her and smiled. "Yeah, it's kick ass. If you're getting a new phone I recommend it." He rang up the last item and announced the total. When Juliette handed over a card, he swiped it and handed it back. "I know a guy who can get you a great deal if you want. I can give you my number. You can call me if you're interested."

Lindsay smiled and nodded. "Cool. I can give you my number too."

They exchanged numbers and as they gathered Juliette's bags. Brian leaned over. "Hey, I really like your socks by the way."

Lindsay looked for Juliette, but she was already close to the door. "Well, thanks. I'll see you around maybe."

Brian nodded. "You have my number and I like movies and coffee as well as phones."

Lindsay blushed and Dani glanced over at the boy behind the counter when she heard his words. She grabbed Lindsay's hand as they moved out the door. "Linds, wow he's cute." She smiled at her daughter and looked ahead to Juliette. "He's really cute."

Lindsay was smiling ear to ear. "I know." She glanced through the shop window and smiled when Brian waved. She waved back and then they were around the corner. "Oh my god, oh my god…mom, he's like super hot." She reached ahead of her and grabbed Juliette's arm. "How did you know he was into me?"

Juliette looked back and smiled. She rolled her eyes. "You're blind, the kid was about drooling over you from the moment you walked in. He was all, watch you, as soon as you looked at him, he'd look away. Both of you were doing the same damn thing and then he smiled when he saw your socks. I mean, big huge smile…he likes you. You need to call him."

Dani slowed her pace as the girls walked ahead of her back to their parking space. Pieces of their conversation filtered into her consciousness, but she wasn't paying attention. Her thoughts had wandered to her own feelings and to Nico. There was an emotional storm brewing inside her and she was starting to wonder if she was the reason. Maybe she was the blind one. If she was the one who really wasn't seeing what was there in front of her all this time, then Juliette and Nico were right. Maybe what she felt for Matt hadn't been real. Maybe it wasn't as deep as she thought. Maybe that relationship was more of a rebound than she thought, because when she admitted it to herself what she felt for Matt and what she felt for Nico were two entirely different things.

She shook her head. She had a hard time believing she just thought that, even to herself. Love should be love, but she felt differently. She tried to justify how she felt with Matt. She'd had fun and he felt free and young, even though he was only two years younger. He'd made her laugh again and he made her feel spontaneous and fresh. He made sex enjoyable again, even though he annoyed her sometimes. When she did call him because she was down or feeling bad, his answer was to make love to her. That was how he always made her feel better. He wasn't good with feelings, but he could kiss her and touch her. He could make her sigh and cum

Maybe she fell for him because he was her first real post-divorce relationship, and in all honestly, he was the second man she'd ever slept with so the therapist in her understood there was probably some emotion tied into that as well. She knew she loved him and she would have married him…probably… if it weren't for the whole kid thing. That still made her a little angry. If he loved her he would have understood…she let him go for that, even though it hurt to do it.

She frowned, but then she thought about Nico and a shiver ran up her spine. She admitted to herself; that never happened with Matt. Never once had Matt's name or even the thought of Matt made her shiver. She smiled, but god, just the thought of Nico or seeing his eyes, or the thought of him sitting on her couch, or beside her in his car. She blinked as desire flooded her vision. She bit her lip and tried to control her thoughts.

Okay, so yes the man could drive her thoughts to sex in no time flat, but that didn't mean she loved him. But, she'd admit that she did want to be with him, to see him every day, to talk to him, to wake up beside him. She wanted to ask his opinion on politics and literature and movies. She wanted ask if he saw the newest review of the Broadway show and to see how his day went. She wanted to get him a cup of coffee when he looked sad, and kiss his forehead. She wanted to tell him it would be okay and then curl up on his lap. When she'd had a bad session with a client or an argument with the kids she wanted to be able to talk to him about it.

She wanted to share good news about the kids with him and take him to Ray Jay's games and she wanted him there to intimidate Lindsay's dates. She had to admit, she loved seeing him with the kids. He had a way with Ray Jay. Matt had been more of a friend with her son, sort of like TK. Nico wasn't. Nico was an uncle or mentor. Ray Jay actually listened to him and looked up to him. She could see it in his eyes. It wasn't like a sports idol-I want to be like Mike-kind of thing, it was more like a wow, this guy can really teach me something worth learning. Nico was also there for the kids. He talked to them, gave them advice and listened to them. He didn't just do the fun stuff like watch movies or get them free stuff and tickets to the games. He gave Lindsay advice about serious stuff. Dani snorted, she doubted Matt would have talked to Lindsay about sex at all.

She was still confused, hell even more confused. Did that mean she loved him? Fuck, she knew it meant something. She knew he made her feel things she never felt before; never with Ray and never with Matt. Physically and emotionally she was in completely new territory. Her heart was pounding and her eyes were watering, and then she realized she was clenching her teeth and hyperventilating.

"Shit…" She slowed her breathing and leaned against a retaining wall by the parking lot when a wave of dizziness hit her. "What the hell am I having a panic attack for?"

She giggled almost hysterically and then took three steps to a bench and sat down. She wiped her eyes and looked around. She knew she was okay and she told herself that. This was just an emotional response to everything. She was overwhelmed. She pulled a tissue from her purse and wiped her eyes. She took a couple more breaths and repeated to herself that she would be okay.

Her hand slid to her phone and she found herself hitting last dialed and send. She really had no explanation for why she did it, other than she knew hearing his voice would make her feel better.

He answered on the second ring as usual. "Dani, are you okay?"

She nodded against the phone and then couldn't help the little hiccup. "Yeah…fine."

He hesitated. "Where are you?"

"Shopping with Lindsay and Juliette, but we're about to head home to get ready for the game." She wiped her nose. "How are things there?"

"What's wrong? You're crying."

"I'm fine. I just wanted to see how you…"

"Stop lying Dani and tell me the truth. What's wrong? Did Juliette say something, did one of the kids upset you?"

"No…no, it's…" she sighed and sniffed, "I just got overwhelmed by everything. I guess it just all hit me at once and uhh…" she sighed and looked up to see the girls at the car looking back at her. She held up her hand and pointed to the phone. They waved. "I don't know, but I knew that I wanted to hear your voice."

"Is there anything in particular you want to hear me say?" His voice was quiet and steady.

"Just tell me everything is going to be okay." She hated that her voice cracked. "Tell me I'm okay."

"Dani are you close to Juliette?" Nico's voice was calm.

She was confused by his question, but she answered him. "Yes, they're by the car and I'm about two hundred feet or so away, why?"

"Because I can locate her phone with GPS and I see where she is and I wanted to know if you were close. I'm coming to pick you up at that location. Someone will take your car back to the house and pick up Ray Jay. I'm worried about you. I want you here with me. Now." He paused. "Right now you're closer to the field where you're at so it makes no sense to send you home first."

Fresh tears pressed into Dani's eyes. "Nico don't…" she swallowed, "You don't have to come get me, I'm fine and I can take care of myself. I think everything just sort of finally toppled for me, but I'm okay now. I just wanted to talk to you."

"Dani, I'm already on my way and it's not a negotiation. I'm coming to get you. I'll be there in fifteen minutes. I'm going to lose my signal in a minute, but I'll be there."

"Don't you have work? Will you get into trouble?" She watched to girls move toward a candy shop and point at something in the window.

"I'm in charge of security. If I feel your security is at risk, it's my call to make." There was static on the line. "I'm go..n…ls… you."

Then he was gone and Dani pulled the phone from her ear. She glanced at the girls and then wiped her face. She was pissed at herself, mostly for being weak enough to have a panic attack and then for giving in and calling Nico over it. She should have just bucked up and moved on. She put her phone in her bag and pulled out her compact. Her makeup was in decent enough shape. She dabbed some powder on her nose to dull the red and headed toward the girls.


	16. Panic at the Sweet Shoppe

**_NOTE:_**So, today's update is mostly on time. I had to try to get this done before tomorrow because I have some personal things going on Monday and Tuesday. It was hard to do, but I got it done. I had a horrible week, some of that was work and some of it was personal. The fates, the planets...karma, take your pick of deity if you have one, whatever it was it conspired against me and mine this week. **  
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Anyway, I hope you enjoy the story. There is a bit of resolution here. I suppose I felt like writing something I wasn't particularly feeling. Though, I understand Dani's panic, my panic runs toward mania rather than true panic. I'm a Gemini. I just freak out and clean or stay up all night and annoy people I love by talking to them or demanding their attention. ;)

Same as always, no beta...thanks for reading and reviews are always appreciated, but I love each and every one of you for reading even if you don't review.

If you want to follow me, or be annoyed by me when I'm manic, you can find me on Twitter atSciFiRN.

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**Panic at the Sweet Shoppe**

Nico put Xeno and Tommy in charge before he left. He was sure Tommy knew to keep Gabrielle happy when she showed up since she still hadn't. He knew when she did she'd be looking for him and he also knew she'd be throwing her weight around. The league had already put a limit on what she could and couldn't do, meaning she'd been effectively reigned in, but Nico knew it wouldn't keep her from trying.

He checked his mirrors and switched lanes before merging onto the expressway. He checked his speed and then set the cruise, even though he'd rather go faster. His fingers strummed on the steering wheel and he glanced at the red dot on the GPS screen. At least Juliette was still where she had been and Dani hadn't left. He was worried and he debated calling Dani back, but he didn't think she was really in serious trouble, more that she was distressed. He worried more that if he called her back she'd be angry at him.

He figured she'd already be angry at him, but she sounded so afraid, hurt and confused and when she asked him to tell her she would be okay he knew he really didn't have a choice. He'd had a busy day already, putting a stop to several small security crises. There had been three fights in the parking lot, a deep fryer fire caused by some tailgaters and a couple caught having sex in the parking lot on security camera. There had been police reports, incident reports and insurance forms to complete. None of which the league appreciated. Luckily, he only had to make sure the paperwork was completed at this point.

He signaled and took his exit and then maneuvered down the side streets to his destination. He parked on the street and paid a meter. He pulled his phone from the console and dialed Dani.

His call went to voicemail. "Fuck." He leaned against the car and looked up the block and then dialed Juliette. She picked up almost immediately.

"Nico, what's going on with my team?" She was laughing and he heard Lindsay say something.

"Where is Dani?" He pushed a hand through his hair. "Where are you for that matter?"

"Dani's in the ladies room and I'm in the Sweet Shoppe, why? You want something? I know you like those dark chocolate covered licorice drops." She said something to someone that Nico couldn't understand.

He sighed and looked up the street. He saw the sign for the shop Juliette mentioned and moved toward it. "Is Dani okay? She was talking to me earlier and she was upset."

She made a noise. "She seems okay, but she's been a little off. I ordered her some tea. Oh and I think we found Lindsay a boyfriend." She giggled. "He's cute Nico, but you'll need to do a complete background check of course."

He heard a struggle for the phone and now he could actually see the girls through the window. Lindsay was trying to pull the phone from Juliette's hand. She wasn't able and Juliette put it back to her ear.

"Sorry about that, she's just upset because I want you to check him out and make sure he's not a stalker pervert." She giggled.

Nico pulled open the door. He hung up his phone. "Well, if you tell me where he is. I'll be sure to have a complete check on him by tomorrow."

Both girls jumped.

Lindsay put her hand on her chest. "Oh my god, where the hell did you come from?"

"Pittsburgh, but most recently the parking lot." He smirked. "I told your mom I was coming for you. She was upset." He looked around the room, toward the back where the restrooms were. "How long has she been in there?"

Juliette shrugged. "I'm not sure." She glanced at Lindsay.

Lindsay's eyebrows pulled together. "I don't know, but it's been a while." She looked up at Nico. "Is she okay?"

He didn't answer, just moved toward the back of the small shop to the doors marked men and women. He opened the men's door. It was a private bathroom. He figured the ladies room was as well. He knocked. "Dani, it's Nico are you okay?"

"I'm fine. I'll be out in a minute. Go sit with the girls or something."

"When you come out, I'll move Dani." He leaned against the door and waited.

The door suddenly flew open and she glared up at him. "Fine, I'm out." She brushed past him and then past the girls and out the door of the shop.

Nico turned to follow her. He paused by the girls' table. "You two stay here, finish your drinks and I'll come back for you." He caught each of their eyes and waited for them to acknowledge him. When they nodded, he sighed and then was gone.

He caught up with Dani easily. She wasn't far. She'd gotten about four stores down the sidewalk and then stopped. She turned and glared at him when he said her name.

"What?"

"Talk to me." His hands settled on her shoulders and he pulled her into his arms. "Tell me what the hell is going on."

She stood stiff against him for all of two seconds and then her arms came up between them, her hands gripped the lapels of his coat and she pressed her face against the scratch of the wool. She didn't try to stop the tears. "I don't know what's wrong with me Nico. God, I don't know." She turned her head to the side and cried against his chest. She wasn't sobbing, just letting the tears flow.

He took a breath and tucked her under his arm. "Come on, let me get you to the car." He guided her to the car and opened the passenger door. Once she was inside he moved around and got in the driver's side. "Now, talk to me Dani."

She stared at her lap and played with the strap of her purse. She shrugged and sniffed. "I don't know. I told you not to come…I just got overwhelmed." She was still crying and she started digging through her purse for a tissue.

Nico pressed a cloth square into her hand and she looked up at him with surprise.

"A handkerchief, a real one?"

He smiled and patted his breast pocket. "My grandfather always said a well dressed gentleman always carried one."

She dabbed her eyes and wiped her nose. "I think I would have liked your grandfather." She smiled.

"I think he would have liked you too." He watched her for a second. "Now, are you going to tell me what's going on?"

She sighed and glanced at him, but didn't answer. She just shook her head and shrugged.

"Are you going to tell me why you called me?"

"I wish I knew Nico, but I'm still trying to figure that out myself." She looked at him almost desperately.

He slanted his head and shifted in his seat. He leaned a bit closer to her and his voice dropped. It was quieter. "What was it that you wanted to hear?"

New tears formed on Dani's lashes and she twisted the handkerchief in her lap. She looked at Nico, blinked and opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out of her mouth. She shut her mouth and shook her head as one fat tear tracked slowly down her right cheek.

He frowned and cupped her cheek. He wiped the tear away with his thumb. "Dani, I'll tell you whatever it is you want to hear because there's so much I want to tell you." He shifted closer, leaned in so that his mouth was a breath from hers. "There's so much I need to tell you." His hand slid to the nape of her neck and his lips brushed across hers lightly.

She shivered and nodded, her cheek brushing against the light scruff of his. Her voice was hoarse with emotion when she answered. "I know."

"I'm just waiting on you baby." He pulled back to look in her eyes and traced the line of her jaw with a finger. "I just need the truth. Don't be afraid the truth is what I don't want to hear. Just don't lie to me Dani. That's all I ask."

Dani's breath suddenly caught in her throat and all the emotion she felt on the sidewalk rose up again. The truth was exactly what she was trying to avoid, at least for now. She was working her way through the truth. She was still trying to figure out what it all meant. Was it possible that before now she'd been lying to herself? She knew she felt something for Nico and that something was real and strong, but what exactly did that mean she'd had before? Had her marriage to Ray been a lie? Had her relationship with Matt just been a flirtation?

Her breath gave way to a sob and the tears restarted in earnest and she turned away from Nico in a rush to stare out the window. She turned her shoulders away from him and wiped her eyes as she struggled to get her emotions under control. She didn't want him to see her in a panic attack. She struggled to slow her breathing and stop her hands from shaking. He was so strong and she felt so weak right now. This was ridiculous. Her heart was pounding and she bit her lip and tried not to hyperventilate.

Nico dropped his hand when Dani turned away from him. His jaw clenched along with his gut. He turned and opened the door. "I'm getting the girls." His voice was steady, the door opened and closed and then he was gone.

Dani didn't know what happened she looked up and he was gone.

Nico moved away from the car quickly and paused about thirty feet away, almost causing a woman to run him over on the sidewalk. She cursed at him and he ignored her, turned back toward the car with a silent curse at himself and then stopped. He stood there, uncharacteristically unsure of himself. Then he fisted his hands, shook his head and turned back toward the Sweet Shoppe to get the girls.

He was angry with himself a bit. He'd pushed her, maybe too much, but then he'd only asked her for the truth. He slowed his pace, but kept moving toward the girls. He knew Dani wanted him in her life, but up until now he hadn't been sure in what capacity. He felt she'd just told him, even if she hadn't used words. He'd told Lindsay earlier today: sometimes when there are no words, actions speak and Dani's actions spoke to him very clearly.

God, he'd thought he'd be able to handle it, no matter what she'd decide, but now he wasn't so sure. It hurt. In fact, it hurt him a lot more than he thought it would. He pushed back the bitterness that rose up inside him. He thought he could deal with being in her life, as long as he was in her life in some way, but now he was second guessing himself. He'd done it with Gabrielle, and he'd ended up hating her, but he knew that was different. Everything about that situation had been fucked up. He loved Marshall and Gabrielle and they both used him to hurt each other. He was stuck in the middle and Gabby manipulated him and he let her for the longest time. He didn't think for a second that Dani would ever use him that way, but he didn't want to be Dani's friend with benefits either. He wanted, hell he needed, to be so much more.

He pulled open the door to the shop. The girls were giggling about something as he approached their table.

"Let's go." He picked up Juliette's bags and waited for them to stand. "We need to get back to the stadium. I'm sure your mother's already there." He sighed. He didn't want to deal with Gabby right now.

Juliette looked up at him and gave him a sharp look. "Are you okay?"

He nodded. "I'm fine, we need to move." He nodded toward the door and looked to Lindsay. "Do you want me to carry your bag?" He motioned to the bag she had by her feet.

She shook her head. "No, I'm good." She glanced around for her mother. "Where's mom?"

"I left her in the car, she's not feeling well." The girls were up now and he herded them out the door and toward the car. "I'll have someone come get your mom's car later and someone's already picking up Ray Jay. He'll meet us at the stadium."

Lindsay nodded. "Cool, so did mom call you or what?"

"Yes."

Juliette looked over at him, but she didn't say anything. They were at the car before Lindsay asked anything else. The girls parked themselves in the backseat while Nico put the bags in the trunk and then he slid into the driver's seat.

He noticed that Dani had herself under control by then. He started the car and glanced over at her. She gave him a hesitant smile and he sighed and put the car in drive, checked the mirrors and pulled away from the curb. He turned the radio on to avoid any silence in the car. He didn't pay attention to what was playing, which was unusual for him, so when Juliette nudged his shoulder his eyes caught hers in the mirror.

"You mind changing the music?" She raised an eyebrow and smirked at him. "Unlike you, we do not appreciate the Mexican folk music."

He narrowed his eyes as he glanced back to the road. "Don't start." He sighed and tapped the button on the steering wheel to switch from his playlist to the radio and hit scan. When the channel settled on something by someone he was sure Juliette would approve of, he stopped the scan. He watched her settle back into her seat.

Dani smiled and her voice was soft from the seat beside him. "I didn't mind the music. She sounded like she loved him."

He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye and he snorted. "She'd cheated on him and she was telling him she was sorry because now she was having the other man's child. Only she didn't love the other man, she loved the man she was with."

"So, she did love him." Dani added. "But, then why did she sleep with the other guy?"

Nico's jaw clenched and his hands tightened on the wheel. "She'd let herself be seduced by his beauty while the man she truly loved was away." He kept his eyes on the road and his answers as short as possible.

"Oh." Dani gave him a slightly puzzled look, but figured he was stiff because the girls were in the back seat. She was simply trying to distract herself anyway. She cleared her throat. "Was Gabrielle there yet?"

Nico shook his head and sighed. "No, but she probably is by now and I'm sure she's pissed."

Juliette giggled. "I bet, especially since you aren't there to try to boss around."

He glanced at her in the mirror and frowned. "She's not going to be happy to see you either."

"Good. I'm feeling better." She took Lindsay's hand. "Between talking to Dani and Lindsay and being with you…and getting stable on the meds." She nodded. "I'm doing good, I can handle Gabby now; bitch."

Lindsay laughed nervously. "If I ever called mom that, she'd kill me."

Nico cleared his throat. "And I'd hunt you down so she could."

Dani smiled at him, but he didn't seem to see it. She looked over her shoulder at her daughter. "I had better never hear you call me that. Think it all you want, but the words should never cross your lips."

She nodded at her mother. "Like I said, you'd kill me and besides, I have no reason to call you that…at least not right now." She looked at Juliette. "Not like the crazy woman who gave birth to this girl…she really is a bitch."

"Normally, I'd ask you not to use that word, but there really is no other word for that woman." She turned around in her seat.

Juliette spoke up. "Actually, there is, but it's worse." She giggled.

"Juliette." Nico's warning was his usual quiet threat.

"I didn't say it Nico, so chill." She started humming along to Payphone.

Nico wrinkled his nose at the music and shifted the speakers to the rear. "I can't believe you like this crap."

Lindsay and Juliette sang, "All these fairytales are full of shit. One more fucking love song I'll be sick…" And then they giggled.

Nico mumbled. "Well at least he got that part right."

Dani glanced over at him. "What's wrong?"

He shot her a quick look and shook his head. "Later."

She frowned. "If this is about my…"

"Dani stop." He interrupted. His voice was quiet, but stern and she stopped immediately.

He looked at her when he pulled to a stop at the traffic light. "Not here okay, but I understand, you take your time. You aren't ready, fine, but we aren't doing this now Dani." He heard the quiet anger creep into his voice and wished he had done a better job keeping it out. He almost missed the light change, but the horn from the car behind him a split second after it turned green nudged him forward.

She blinked at him and nodded before turning to stare out the window. Her voice was barely a whisper when she added, "Okay." She hated that there were tears in her eyes again. She'd hurt him, she saw it on his face and heard it in his voice. She hadn't meant to and fuck, she was pretty sure he'd completely misunderstood; pretty sure because she wasn't really sure what she felt yet, but it wasn't that she didn't need him, or didn't want him.

Fuck. That was the furthest thing from the truth. If she were honest with herself that's what terrified her the most, never before had she needed anyone like she needed Nico. Never before had she wanted anyone or missed anyone like she did Nico. It terrified her. She had always been independent and prided herself on it. Now, all of the sudden, she found herself needing someone in ways that scared her to her core. He stirred up longings for things she never knew she wanted and then her need to just be with him…god that was scary enough to her. She always told clients that love should make you feel secure. That you shouldn't need to or want to be with the person you love obsessively, but she felt almost obsessive.

She shook her head, okay she really wasn't obsessed. She reconsidered and bit her pointer finger. She could focus on her work and her kids. She could do her normal activities. It was only after those were done that her mind would drift to Nico. Then and between clients and when she drove or showered and when she did her chores or shopped. She thought about him while she cooked and yea, all the time. She wiped her eyes.

She was fucked. She knew it; obsessed-completely. She was screwed, but was she willing to admit she was head over heels in love with the man? Her heart pounded and another wave of panic rushed over her and once again she struggled with trying to understand why that thought terrorized her. She rested her head against the glass and shut her eyes.

The rest of the drive passed in silence. The radio and the girls chatting in the backseat were the only sounds in the car.

They reached the stadium about twenty minutes before kickoff. Nico pulled the car into the lot and was met by Tommy and Xeno, both of them were frowning.

He leaned against the front quarter panel. "What is she screaming about?" He crossed his arms and glanced at the passenger seat. Dani was still inside, but she was stirring. He was pretty sure she'd dozed off and Lindsay was talking to her now.

Xeno spoke first. "What isn't she screaming about would be a better question, but the main one is where are you? Then why isn't there food and champagne and she wants a kosher meal for the lawyers." He handed Nico a paper. "Here's a copy of her list."

Nico took it and crumpled it in his fist. He shoved it into his pocket. "What list?" His eyebrow rose. "The food will be ready at five, like it always is. Appetizers at kickoff, but not before and there is never champagne except for playoffs, so why would we have champagne for Marshall's memorial." He rubbed his forehead. "It's not a celebration." He made a disgusted sound in his throat. "Never mind, she may view it differently."

Tommy had opened the back door and the girls were out and chatting and he was now helping Dani from the car.

Xeno smiled. "How are you Dr. Dani?"

She smiled at him. "Good Xeno, you? Your wife and kids?"

He ducked his head. "Good and Shelly and the kids are doing good too. Thanks for asking." He nodded to the girls. "Miss Juliette, Lindsay."

Juliette grabbed Lindsay's hand and pulled her toward the private entrance. "C'mon, let's head upstairs. I gotta pee."

Lindsay rolled her eyes. "What's with you…I swear you always have to pee."

The other girl shrugged and they waited for Tommy to unlock the door and let them in.

Dani watched the girls and waited on Nico.

Nico pushed away from the car. "Did anything else happen while I was gone?"

Xeno shook his head. "No, it was quiet. We made sure the paperwork was done and the police and fire reports were filed and by that time Ms. Pittman was here with her lawyers."

Nico waited for Dani, held the door for her and then followed her inside. "Good. I'll take Dr. Santino up to the box and deal with Gabrielle. If you need me, that's probably where I'll be."

Xeno nodded and headed off toward the security level.

Nico sighed and hit the button on the elevator. "Are you ready for Gabrielle?"

Dani hugged herself. "No, but are you?" She watched the man beside her. She could see the stress on his face.

"As ready as I'm going to be, but then I'm used to dealing with her." He rolled his head on his neck. "She's going to be vicious Dani, be careful."

"Okay." She reached for Nico's hand, but he took a step back. She gasped and frowned. "I know you're angry…"

"Hurt, I'm not really angry, at least I'm trying very hard not to be."

The elevator rang and the doors opened. He waited for Dani to step inside and then he followed her. He touched the button for the owner's box and when the doors closed he continued. "It's hard, but that's how I feel."

"Okay, but I haven't had a chance to explain how I feel yet Nico." She looked up at him with her hands on her hips. There was frustration in her voice. "So, I'm not sure how you can be hurt or angry."

"Because you pulled away. It's your actions. They're speaking loud and clear. You aren't ready, or you don't feel anything close to what I might feel, so let's drop it. We can talk later, once we get back to your place. Okay?"

Dani glared at him, because he was not hearing her. "You aren't being fair to me right now, but fine. We'll talk later." He was so stubborn sometimes. She looked at him, watched his jaw work as he looked at her. She knew what she just said was working into his thoughts. Good because now she was angry.

The elevator opened and all eyes in the box turned toward them.

It was Gabrielle's voice that was loudest.

"Well, look who decided to join us; Nico Careles and his new whore."

Nico stepped into the room and moved toward her. He was not in the mood. He gave her a cool smile. "That must make you my old whore then Gabrielle." He raised an eyebrow, and ignored her indignant gasp. "You were the one who started throwing slurs around first and it's common knowledge we were sleeping together in the past. I figure if it applies to Dani, it applies to you as well." He moved to stand behind Juliette. He put his hands on her shoulders and bent his so that his head was close to her ear. "You okay sweetheart?" He asked quietly.

She leaned back against him and nodded, but as Dani drew closer, Juliette moved to stand beside her. "I'm okay."

He glanced to Lindsay and saw the desperate question and then instant clarity cross her face when Gabrielle's words finally sank in. She was a smart kid and he hoped she wouldn't be angry. He gave her a hesitant smile and when she winked at him he felt instant relief. Regardless of what was going on with him and Dani, he didn't want to upset the kids. He liked them both.

Lindsay took her mom's hand and wrapped her arm around her shoulder. She whispered something and then said something to Juliette that made both girls giggle and Dani blush.

It was all too quiet for Nico to hear, but based on Dani's downcast eyes, high color and the fact that she was now telling them to hush, he figured it had something to do with Gabrielle's revelation.

Gabrielle glared at them. "Isn't this sweet then." She took a step toward them, her heels clicking on the tile. "A show of solidarity from a makeshift family, but it doesn't mean anything really does it?" She sighed. "And you, what the patriarchal figure is so quiet…nothing to say?"

He shook his head. "To you, no; not anymore. I told you we have lawyers and they are more than capable of discussing anything that needs to be discussed. The only reason Juliette is here is because the team was important to her father and to her. You are here because the media expects you to be here, I doubt you actually care about the memorial."

He took a step toward the woman and looked at her with a cynical eye. He tried to see her like he used to. She was beautiful, tall, dark, lovely, elegant and cultured, but when did she become so cold, so calculating. She'd always been quick to criticize and condemn, and her sense of humor had tended to be acerbic, but he'd loved her. Maybe he'd overlooked her flaws. Youthful love had a way of doing that; of putting someone up on a pedestal. But then he'd changed and he was sure she had too. He hadn't treated her fairly. He knew pushing her to Marshall and then pulling her back and forth between them had screwed with her head. God, they'd all fucked up.

Now though, all he saw in her was ugliness. There was no love between them. Whatever spark was gone. He would never even be tempted to sleep in a chair beside her again. What he wanted now was a warm, quick with a smile, curvy, dark haired psychologist with a fiery personality that kept him on his toes and a passion that matched his in bed. God, he glanced over his shoulder to see Dani glance up at him. She gave him a hesitant smile. His heart twisted and then he turned his attention back to Gabrielle.

She made a defeated sound in her throat. "Nico, can we please dispense with the posturing and get down to business. We really do have things we need to talk about. I'd like to get it over with."

He gave her a stern look, glanced from Juliette to Dani and Lindsay and then nodded. "We can talk in my office. Let me talk to Juliette for a second."

He left Gabrielle where she was and moved to where the girls were by the box window. They were watching the team warm up on the field. "I'm going to talk to Gabby." He said as he approached.

Dani turned and looked up at him. "Okay, we're fine."

He caught her gaze and pursed his lips. "Ray Jay should be here in a few minutes. I'm sorry about Gabrielle's announcement." He looked over to Lindsay. "Your mother and I didn't want you to find out that way."

She shrugged and gave him a shy smile. "It's okay. Mom explained things and it's cool…really. Me and Ray Jay like you."

He smiled. "I like you both too."

"Nico, before the game actually starts might be nice."

He glared at the woman by the elevator, her arms were crossed and she was tapping the toe of her red Giuseppe Zanotti heels.

"You don't even watch the games Gabrielle." He sighed. "I'll be back as soon as I can." He checked his watch. "The appetizers will be up in just a minute or two. If you need anything else, press the 'O' button on the phone and ask for Tommy, of you can reach me on my cell." He started to turn.

Dani hesitated for a second and then before he got too far she stepped away from the window. "Nico." When he paused she stepped up to him and pressed close.

His hands went to her hips, half to steady her, half to move her back, "What are you doing?"

"Shh, everyone in here knows." She added quickly as she went up on her toes, reached behind his neck and pulled him down for a quick kiss on his lips. She pulled back. "I'm sorry." She whispered by his ear. "Don't write me off yet." She stepped away, but kept her eyes on his as she moved back to her place with the girls.

He was confused and his eyebrows pulled together and then his expression went neutral as he turned to face Gabrielle. "Let's go Gabby." He crossed the room quickly, pressed the down button and when the doors opened he moved inside with Gabby. He turned and as he waited his eyes locked with Dani's and until the doors closed they stayed that way.

The moment they were alone Gabrielle turned toward him. "What the hell was that about? Does she piss on you to mark her territory too?"

"What the hell Gabrielle, don't be so fucking crude." He leaned against the wall of the elevator and crossed his arms. "You're the one who started in with the antagonism."

She gave him her best Cheshire cat smile and stepped closer to lean against him. "But you like a little antagonism." She traced a finger up his chest, under his tie. "I know how to push your buttons Nico. I bet that little thing doesn't have a clue." Her hand started moving south.

The elevator door opened and Nico stepped forward, which caused Gabby to stumble. He laughed when she had to catch herself against the wall. "Those heels are dangerous Gabby, be careful. You know the way to my office that's where I'll be."

"You son of a bitch…"

He laughed and kept walking. He smiled when he saw Ronnie come around the corner with Ray Jay in tow. "Ray Jay, your mom's upstairs with Lindsay and Juliette." He turned to Ronnie.

Gabrielle rushed out of the elevator just then. "Nico, so help me I'm going to…" She trailed off when she realized they weren't alone. "Oh…well now," She suddenly stopped and looked Ray Jay up and down with a predatory smile. "And who is this cute little thing?"

Ray Jay smiled, really smiled.

Ronnie frowned and stepped between the boy and the other woman. She took Ray Jay's arm and tugged him toward the elevator. "I got this boss. Come on kiddo, let's get moving." She glared at the woman. "And trust me boy, you don't want a piece of that no matter how pretty you think it looks. It's like the poison apple from Snow White; rotten at the core and probably full of all kinds of disease on top of that…" She continued to glare as they boarded the elevator.

Gabrielle ground her teeth. "I'd fire that one Nico. She's got an attitude."

"She's not going anywhere Gabrielle." He was getting a headache. "Let's go, now." He stepped to the side and waited for Gabby to move ahead of him. When she did, he followed her to his office. Once inside, he was polite, but reserved. He offered her a drink, which she declined.

"Okay, so what is it we desperately needed to speak about then?" He sat back in his chair and folded his hands on his lap.

She leaned back and crossed her legs. She smiled at him. "How is Juliette doing? I'm worried about her."

He shook his head and let his disbelief show on his face. "Like I believe you really care about her after you pushed the drugs back into her system. Do you really expect me to believe that when you essentially were planning on having her recommitted after getting her hooked back on drugs?" He wanted to shake her. "You did it on purpose you bitch."

"Nico, she was out of control in her grief and I needed her controlled. It was the best way." She frowned at him and tears were in her eyes. "You don't understand that feeling. You aren't a parent. Watching your child hurt that way. It's horrible."

He stood suddenly and rounded the desk He ignored her tears. She could turn them off and on to suit her needs and he knew it. "Don't you dare tell me I don't understand how it feels. She might not be my blood, but I feel like she's mine and I hurt when she does." He pushed his hair off his forehead. "God, I watched her hurt and I had to choose to let her keep hurting or push more drugs into her veins because of you." He was shaking. "I hate you, but I love her and I understand how it feels and I would do anything Gabby, anything for her, including giving up my own life for her…would you do that? Hell, would you even give up an hour of sleep for her?"

Gabrielle blinked up at him and swallowed at the raw emotion she saw on his face, heard in his voice. He was vibrating with it. "I…"

He held up a hand. "Don't, I'm not done. You know what else? I have more to say. You mocked our makeshift family, but let me tell you something. Dani has shown your daughter, who is essentially a stranger to her, more love in a week than I've seen you show her in the past two years, probably longer. She's cried with her, held her, stayed up with her, cleaned her up when she's vomited…shit did you ever do that? I did, even Marshall did, but you? I think you relied on one of the nannies if one of us wasn't around. So, we may be a makeshift family, but at least we are a functional one and we love each other."

"You love her?" Her mouth hung open. "You love that woman? Surely you know what kind of family she's from…her background, her mother's a gambler, her father…"

"Seriously? My mother was a drug abuser Gabrielle, my parents weren't married. I have multiple arrests as a juvenile. You know my past. Do you really want to compare mine with hers?"

"But look where you are now, I mean?" She stood up and slid her hands up his chest to his shoulders. "You've made so much of yourself."

He grabbed her hands and stepped away. "Stop it. What we had Gabby, it's over and I don't know how many times or how many ways I can tell you." He sighed. "It's getting old. I don't love you. I don't want you. I don't even care what happens to you anymore, unless Juliette wants me to, and then I will but only for her."

He moved across his office and sat on the couch. He leaned his elbows on his knees. He was already tired of this conversation. "Now, what do you want?"

Gabrielle didn't move for beat, and then she turned. "I needed to know."

"Know what?" He looked up at her and watched her move toward him.

"If there was any hope for us. I still wanted you and I knew you were angry about how I dealt with Juliette. We never agreed about her, but I thought you might have cooled down by now." She sat in the chair perpendicular to the couch. "We've fought before and then when you cool down, well you know…"

He frowned. Yes, he did know. They would fight and then once the anger faded they'd fuck like crazy, but all he felt when he looked at her now was disgust. He shook his head. "It's not happening. I don't feel anything for you anymore Gabby, except anger at how you treated Marshall and Juliette recently."

She nodded. "I know and I know I've been horrible."

"You, contrite?"

She snorted and shook her head. "Not really, I just know I've been horrible. I'm not apologizing for it." She shrugged. "It's who I am and I'd do it all again to get what I want." She pushed herself from her chair. "Okay, so if you have Juliette, don't expect me to be responsible for her bullshit. If she gets her ass into trouble you're getting it out."

He stood and glared. "And that's any different from any other time in the past?"

She gave him a sarcastic smile as she opened her purse. She handed him an envelope. When he took it she added. "And I'm suing you, consider yourself served." She walked out of his office.

He looked at the envelope and shook his head. "Bitch." He didn't bother to open it, just put it on his desk to wait for later. He knew it was just a ploy to keep his attention on her when he was trying to keep his distance. She'd sued him three times in the past. He was used to it.

He stood in his office for a few minutes. He wasn't looking forward to spending time upstairs with Gabrielle. He'd prefer to watch the game from the field or tunnel like he usually did. He grabbed his iPad from the desk and locked the door behind him as he left.

_Upstairs…_

The minute Ray Jay entered the box Lindsay grabbed his arm and pulled him off to the side, back toward the small hallway where the catering service was setting up.

"Oh my god, oh my god you missed like a huge bombshell." Her voice was quiet, but excited.

His brows furrowed and he glanced around the box. "Dude, did you see this place. Like really, there are recliners." He was smiling and trying to look past her.

"Ray Jay pay attention, I'm trying to tell you something important." She slapped his shoulder.

"What?" He rolled his eyes. "And hurry up I'm starved and the food smells good."

"We got here and Gabrielle was here and she's all like, 'well look it's Nico and his new whore…'"

His face was suddenly serious and he looked around the box again. "Wait, that bitch called mom a whore? Where is she and did Nico put her in her place?"

Lindsay squinted at her brother and her jaw dropped. She hit his shoulder and then kicked his shin, smiling when he started hopping in pain. "You jackass, you knew and you didn't tell me."

"First, I just found out Friday and it was a total accident that I figured it out and second mom wasn't ready to tell us, so I figured I'd just let her tell us when she was." He rubbed his leg. "After mom's whole Matt thing, I figure she didn't want to rush this whole Nico thing, but really I like him and I think it's cool." He shrugged, "What about you?"

She cocked her head to the side. "He's good for mom." She glanced to their mother, who was talking to Ronnie and Juliette. "He seems more, I don't know…more put together than Matt. Matt was like a college kid, Nico's like the college professor."

Her brother looked at her and shook his head. "Okay, whatever…I like him and I think he makes more sense for mom, if that's what you're saying then I agree with you."

The elevator doors opened and Gabrielle Pitman slithered into the box. She said something to one of her people and they started chattering to her about something.

"So, that's the bitch huh? Well, I can see why Nico had a thing for her." He watched as she moved toward him.

She smiled as she stopped by the catering table and picked up a plate. She put a couple hors d'oeuvres on the plate. She looked at him. "So, I don't think we've been introduced."

Lindsay shot the woman a hard look. "This is my brother Ray Jay." She smiled acidly and added, "You know Nico's new whore's son."

Nico, who had just arrived in the box, bit back a huge smile. He hurried toward the three of them. "Lindsay, Ray Jay, why don't you get your mom and Juliette so you can grab some food." He gave Lindsay a stern look.

Ray Jay took her arm and hid his smile. "Come on Linds." He pulled her away from the table.

The girl glared at the woman; it was an open challenge and both women knew it.

Nico completely admired the girl for it. Something warm rose up inside him. She reminded him of her mother so much. She was protective of the people she loved and she loved her brother a hell of a lot to try to protect him from this woman.

"If you start anything with him I will destroy you Gabby." Nico's voice was nothing but ice.

"Pfft, he's a baby Nico, what use would I have for him?" She nibbled on a cheese puff, looked to where Ray Jay was and licked her fingers rather obscenely. "Well, I suppose he would have one use." She added suggestively.

"I'm serious; everything Gabby."

"Don't threaten me Careles." She picked up a bottle of water and walked away from the table.

Nico ground his teeth and closed his eyes as he counted to ten. He hadn't heard anyone move, so he was a bit surprised when he felt a hesitant hand very low on the small of his back. He knew who it was by her touch and it immediately calmed him. He turned.

"Dani." He sighed as he opened his eyes to look down at her.

"How did you know it was me?" She asked surprise in her voice.

He shrugged. "I can tell." He took her hand. "Your hand is small and the way you touched me." He traced his thumb over her palm, a kanji character. A different one than he had before. "It was how you touched me. Only someone who's been in my bed would have touched me that way."

Her eyes dropped to their hands and she watched for a few seconds. Then her eyes slid up to his. She was a bit surprised to see heat kindling in their hazel depths. She took a short breath and stepped a bit closer to him. "Are you okay?"

He nodded and the fingers of his other hand teased lightly up the side facing away from the others, just brushing the curve of her breast. "Gabby just frustrates me and she's threatening people I care about."

"Me?" Her eyebrow rose and she asked breathless. Her eyes drifted shut when his thumb grazed her nipple. "I can handle her."

"I know." He watched her face. "God Dani I want to make everyone leave this room right now." He squeezed her hand and released it reluctantly. "But I can't and it wasn't you. Gabby was eyeballing Ray Jay. I know it's just to get a rise out of me, but I still don't like it." He saw the elevator lights moving and he stepped away from Dani. "The reporters are on their way up, so it's time to smile and behave. Let's get some food?"

He turned from Dani and called to the girls and Ray Jay. "Come on, you better eat before the reporters start. They always finish all the good stuff and I'm not listening to Juliette and Ray Jay complain about how hungry they are until after halftime when the rest of the food shows up."

Ray Jay smiled. "Hells yea, you mean there's more after this?" He grabbed a plate and started piling chicken wings and cheese puffs onto his plate.

Dani watched the kids and shook her head. She hoped Gabrielle didn't start anything more. She had enough on her plate to deal with right now emotionally. She sat with a sigh and watched as Nico and Gabrielle greeted the reporters.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR 

Nico drove them home later. Juliette was quiet and the memorial had hit her pretty hard. She had held it together while the reporters were in the box, but Dani had pulled him aside in the fourth quarter.

"She's breaking Nico. She's late for her meds to begin with. I wasn't planning on not returning to the house, so I don't have them and today's been stressful. Her mother's throwing barbs and well, she's at her breaking point. If we don't do something about the reporters…" She didn't finish the sentence.

She didn't have to. He understood. He had simply suggested that they get photo ops and interviews with the players after the game and then had Tommy and Xeno meet them at ground level.

He glanced into the backseat and shook his head. Juliette was between the Santino kids and while she had started out with her head on Ray Jay's shoulder, he'd shifted his arm behind her so that her head was now on his chest. She looked more comfortable, but her eyes were still wet.

Ray Jay caught his eye in the mirror and he gave him an apologetic look. The kid looked about as comfortable holding the crying girl as any kid his age would have.

Nico smiled. He knew the kid was on the up and up with Juliette. He turned his attention back to the road with a sigh. He was thankful as he pulled into Dani's drive. He parked and turned the car off.

The kids scrambled from the car and into the house like they were drawn there by an unseen force.

Nico shook his head as he opened Dani's door and walked her in. "Wow, that was a bit crazy."

"You get used to it." She locked the door behind them and dropped her purse on the counter. She sat and pulled her heels off. "These shoes are killing my feet." She dropped each shoe to the floor with a sigh and then stretched her feet. She watched Nico move to her office.

He returned with Juliette's medicine. "I'll be right back." He headed up the stairs.

"You want some wine?" She asked as he moved past her.

"Please." He threw out over his shoulder and then he was gone.

Dani winced when she stood. Her feet were sore, but as she moved they loosened up. She pulled the bottle of chardonnay that he had bought her from the fridge and opened it. She found glasses in the cabinet and set them on the counter and stared out the window over the sink.

"It's a nice night, maybe a little cool, but we could sit outside?" He held up the sweater she wore in the mornings and a pair of slipper from her bedroom.

She smiled and nodded. "Sounds good." She slid her arms into the sweater when he held it up for her and then she slipped the footwear on.

Nico picked up the wine and glasses and then opened the backdoor and waited for Dani. It really was a nice night. It was in the mid-sixties and there was no wind. There was a mostly full moon and he enjoyed the fall. He inhaled the scent of leaves and then brushed a few leaves off the glider Dani still had on her back porch. He pulled the small side table closer and set the wine down, poured and then sat after she did. He handed her a glass and picked up his own.

He took a sip. He smiled. "This is the bottle I bought you isn't it?" He settled an arm along the back of the glider.

She settled against him with a smile. "Maybe, but don't tell me it's horrible."

He shook his head. "It's not." He sipped again. "It's actually rather good." He rested his head on the back and set his glass on his thigh. He stared up at the sky. He was used to the city sky. "I always forget that you can see stars out here."

"Yea, not too many, but some, there's still too many lights and the moon is pretty bright tonight." She looked up at the sky for a few seconds and then shifted her gaze to his profile. A lump settled in her throat. "How can you do this to me?" Her voice was thick with emotion and soft as a whisper.

He turned his head to look at her. The moonlight reflected the unshed tears in her eyes and the lights from the kitchen window highlighted the auburn in her hair. "Do what?" He lifted his left hand and fingered a piece of hair that caught his eye.

"Make me feel so much." She inhaled and it caught in a hiccup. She blinked and a tear slid down her right cheek. She shook her head. "It makes me panic…I can't handle it." She sat up and took a drink, not a sip, a long drink from her glass. Then she looked him in the eye.

He saw the panic, the desperation. He'd seen it before on soldier's faces, in Marshall's eyes, hell even on his own face. She was losing control, he wasn't sure why, but she leaned forward and struggled to control her breathing.

She glanced back at him and he saw the look on her face. She was begging him for help without words.

Nico wasn't sure what exactly what triggered her panic, but he knew he could help. He took her glass and set it on the small table along with his and he rubbed her back. "Shh, Dani listen to me okay. I want you to breathe out all the way."

She looked up at him again.

"Come on baby, exhale; all the way." He exhaled with her. "Good girl. Now breathe in, one, two, three, four, and hold it for a seven count." He rubbed her back, stroking slowly as he counted. "One, two, three, four, five, six, seven…now exhale all the way nice and slow for an eight count Dani." He stroked her back again and continued counting.

When she'd finished, he had her repeat it two more times and when he was done she was visibly calmer. "Okay, better?" He held her by her shoulders and looked into her eyes. She was with him now, not lost in her panic. "You want to talk about it?"

She nodded and wiped her eyes. "Can you hold me?" She leaned into his chest, not waiting for his answer. She needed his strength and somehow knew he would give it to her.

He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head. "Is this what happened when you were shopping? Is this why you called me?"

She nodded against him. "It overwhelmed me. You overwhelm me and I don't know what to do with it. I don't know what to do with you…with the feelings." She pulled back and looked at him, tears on her face. She touched his cheek. "My god, I've told you a million times the way you make me feel."

He covered her hand with his and pressed a kiss to her palm. "That's usually after I do amazing things to you in bed."

She rolled her eyes. "That's only part of it." She stared into his eyes and then looked to his lips because he was distracting her. "I mean yes that is honestly the best and most amazing sex I have ever had, and it does overwhelm me at times, but you make me want things I never dreamed I would think about. Things I thought were a little perverse…"

"You're blushing Dani." He kissed her neck. "Eventually, I'm going to cure you of that."

She shivered and bit her lip. Her hands slid to his shoulders. "I think I would like you to try."

He groaned. "Shit, you are going to kill me." His hand moved into the hair. "You need to finish what you were telling me."

She nodded. "Like that though, I want that with you…I want things I never wanted with Ray or with Matt and it's not because they didn't want things. Okay, maybe Matt and I never explored much, but Ray wanted more than just missionary with the lights off." She rolled her eyes. "It was me who wasn't exactly into much more than the three tried and true positions in our typical lovemaking playbook. I mean, we tried bondage and I hated it and we never did it again. With you, what? We sleep together three times and I let you tie me up. Not only that I fucking love it and then...don't get me started about the spanking." She pressed her face into his shoulder. "God…"

He tugged her hair until she lifted her head from his shoulder. "What Dani? Tell me what the rest of that sentence is."

She shook her head. "Don't make me, Nico."

He kissed her, soft and seductively and then his teeth grazed her lower lip sharply.

She hissed.

He let her lip go and tightened his grip on her hair. "Tell me."

She sniffed and dropped her gaze to her lap. "I can't get it out of my head. It's probably been my go to fantasy the last few times I needed one." She once again pressed her face against him, this time into the curve of his neck. She inhaled his scent. "You smell so good."

His cock tightened at her words and as much as he'd love to explore what she'd just told him, he knew now wasn't the time, but he couldn't help but smile. He took a breath. "So, you panic while shopping and call me and then when I get there, what happened?"

"I was too embarrassed. I had another panic attack." She lifted her head and wiped her face. "I'm a therapist and here I was panicked. I can't do that. I didn't want you to see me that way so I turned away in the car. You got upset. It wasn't what you thought." She shook her head. "I don't want you out of my life Nico. I can't handle you gone. When I thought about that, what if you decided to end it…" She bit her lip when it trembled. "Don't do that to me. You overwhelm me, but it's because I can't figure out if that means I've never really loved before or if I was fooling myself all these years or what."

It took a minute for what she said to sink in, but he was pretty sure in a roundabout way she'd just told him that she loved him. His hand slid from her hair and to her shoulder. "I'm not going anywhere Dani."

"All these years I thought I loved Ray and maybe I did, but…" she shrugged, "I never felt for him even half of what I feel for you." She smiled and wiped her eyes again. "I hate that I'm crying, but I can't help it. You make me cry. You make me do a lot of everything and then when I was with Matt I think I loved him, but he made me angry too. I felt like his mother sometimes. Like I had to constantly watch out for him, remind him, pick up after him." She sighed. "And then he wanted a baby…I told him upfront I wasn't going there, but he never dropped it. Was that fair? I resented him for that. I still do. Is that love?" She looked at Nico.

"Then there's you. I don't know exactly where you fit or what you do to me. You were my friend long before anything else. You snuck in as friend, because you were annoying before you were friend. Then you somehow ended up in my bed." She leaned in and kissed him.

It was long and slow. Hands slid over clothing and gasps in the darkness came from both of them. Dani's hand slid over the bulge between his legs and Nico pressed his hand between hers.

She pulled back with a gasp and nodded. "That would be how." She rested her forehead against his and caught her breath. "So, annoying, then friend, then lover." She put a hand on his cheek and pulled back to see his eyes. "Now what? You devastate me, like a hurricane. You came in, rushed over me and flooded me. The water hasn't receded and I don't recognize who I am yet."

"But you're still you Dani." He searched her eyes.

She nodded. "I know, I'm starting to realize that, but that's what I've been struggling with. That's the panic. And how I feel about you is mixed in with all that devastation. It's there and I think I've found it, but you had to give me time." She smiled at him. "You had time to realize how you felt. I had this week and when it finally hit me it knocked me on my ass Nico."

He leaned in and kissed her again. He slanted her head, but only teased her lips with his tongue until she opened for him and then he only deepened the kiss when her tongue begged his to play. His hands teased the sides of her breasts and he let his thumbs brush over both her nipples at the same time.

Dani leaned into Nico's hands and she gripped his shoulders. She moaned when he kissed his way to her ear. "You drive me out of my mind…"

He smiled and bit at her earlobe. "Danielle," His hands moved to her head so could frame her face and then he pulled back so he could look her in the eyes. "You are the most amazing woman I have ever met. I respect your kindness and compassion, but your protectiveness and loyalty amaze me." He couldn't resist kissing her gently. He pulled back and smiled. "When I finally had the privilege to make love to you…" He shut his eyes and then opened them again, "I found that your passion in the bedroom matched the passion you have when you work to help your clients and I couldn't believe how lucky I was. Dani, I love you for more reasons than I can possibly list, but if you want I could go on for a little while longer." He winked at her.

Dani didn't try to stop her tears, but she did smile in spite of them. She also pulled Nico against her and pressed her lips to his. "Shut up and kiss me again."


	17. Say What You Feel, Feel What You Say

**_NOTE:_**Well, the same stuff as usual. I have no beta so all mistakes are my own and there are probably plenty. I've been pretty damn distracted this week, and struggled to get this edited. Sometimes that's good because I actually buckle down, but sometimes it's not and I miss stuff I shouldn't. If I missed a bunch of crap, I apologize.

I spent way too much time worrying and in a hospital...Not for me, but basically for someone I consider to be family. He is better, but it was serious. I am much less stressed now. :D

* * *

**Say What You Feel, Feel What You Say**

Nico kissed her quickly and then pulled back with a smile. He turned, poured more wine, tucked Dani against his side as he handed her glass to her and then settled back with his own glass. He took a sip and sighed.

"What?" She was confused, still in a daze from her emotions and hearing him tell her he loved her. She held the glass, her head against his shoulder, but her heart was pounding and her body was still on fire. "God, what are you doing?"

He half laughed. "I'm not god…" He turned to look at her with a twinkle in his eye. "Am I really that good in bed?"

"Ha and ha." She sat up and took a drink. "Really, what are you doing?" She shifted her position and turned so that she was half facing him and slid one leg between his. It was a little awkward on the glider, but it let her slide her other leg behind his back. She pressed against his side. "I thought we were just getting started and then you hand me wine." She held it up and took another sip. "You do not need to get me drunk to have your way with me." She nuzzled the bit of his neck she could above his collar and kissed his jaw. Then she leaned around him and set her glass down on the table.

He took advantage of her position, turned and caught her lips. His tongue pushed into her mouth possessively laying claim and leaving her breathless. He pulled back and whispered. "Trust me baby," he paused and lightly bit at her lower lip until she shivered. When he continued his voice was rougher, and it grated across her sensitive nerves like fine sandpaper, "When I finally have my way with you, I don't want you drunk. I want you to remember every…single…second of it."

She shivered and blinked at him as she waited for her eyes to focus and her mind to work again. There was something about the way he emphasized the words, 'have my way with you', that sent heat spiraling through her. "Oh my god…" Her eyes closed and then opened and she licked her lips. "How can you get me so hot just saying that and why does that scare me just a bit?"

He chuckled, leaned back to set his own glass down and kept his eyes on hers as he reached for her so that his fingers could trace the outline of a pert nipple through her shirt. He smiled when she gasped. "Because you know it's a promise." He circled the nipple and watched as her eyes clouded and pupils darkened. "And you want it, you like letting go for me Danielle." His fingers continued to play her nipple, rolling and pulling.

She was focused on that one point of her body. It was a new experience for her, to be so focused on one singular area of sensation that wasn't her clit. Between him talking to her and his eyes on her, she didn't think it would take much if he did touch her lower. "With you…" she nodded to answer his him. "For you." She arched her head back and pushed her breast to his hand as her eyes drifted closed at the sensations.

It was true. It was only with him that she felt safe enough to let go and the time she let him bind her it wasn't because she wanted it, it was because she knew he wanted it. What surprised her was that giving it to him actually empowered her. She didn't feel like she gave anything up. She felt like she gained way more.

Nico pinched her nipple harshly and Dani's eyes shot open.

She moaned softly. "Please…"

He leaned close, his fingers twisting and pinching and then he kissed her and his hands moved to her other breast to tease the neglected nipple. He pulled back from her mouth. "Please what Dani?"

She gasped at the sensations. The right nipple was throbbing and swollen, but it felt neglected now that he was playing with the left. Her panties were soaked and she wanted more, but then that last pinch…shit. She gripped his biceps. "I don't know…"

He smiled and rolled the left nipple a little harder. "Do you want me to stop?"

She shook her head. "No…please don't…" She tried to pull him closer, almost panicked that he might.

He brought his other hand back to the right breast and ran his thumb over the nipple. It peaked instantly through her shirt and thin bra. "Your body is telling me it wants more, Dani." He rolled the nipple and then pinched both hard enough to make her squirm and bring tears to her eyes.

Her eyes went wide and found his and she opened her mouth and then when she had no words, she pressed her teeth together. Nothing came out but a hissing sound. She rocked herself against Nico's hip hoping it would distract her from the discomfort. She discovered that the sharp pain somehow only intensified the ache between her legs and the hiss became a long, low moan.

Nico knew he couldn't keep this up. Not on the deck, with the kids upstairs. Not in the backyard. Shit, what he wanted was more suited to his loft. Soundproof and private. Just because he'd never had a woman there, didn't mean he'd never planned. His fantasies were getting the best of him. His mind and body were on fire and he knew he needed to rein it in. He pulled his hands from her breasts and pulled her onto his lap. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her cheek until she turned her face to him and his lips found hers.

Her arms were around his shoulders in seconds. "Please…" she moaned before she kissed him. Her hands gripped his hair and she held his head still, kissing him until she needed to breathe. She pulled back and looked down at his face. Her breath was coming in small, panting gasps. "I need you."

Her hair was wild and he brushed it out of her face. "I know, but here is not going to work." He smiled and his hands moved to her hips so he could lift her to her feet. She let him set her down and then he stood. He was surprised when she pressed against him almost immediately. "Whoa." He almost tumbled back onto the glider. He held onto her hips to steady himself. "I know the kids know about us, but I doubt they want to see or hear their mother getting it on." He arched an eyebrow at her.

Dani pressed her face to his chest and her hands stroked over the silk of his tie. "I know, you make me forget myself."

"Come one, grab the bottle. Let me get the glasses." He stepped back and picked up the glasses. He then opened the door and waited for Dani to enter the kitchen. Once inside he locked the door and set the glasses on the counter.

Dani looked up at him from the other side of the counter. It wasn't particularly late. The kids were upstairs, but they were still up. She was frustrated. She wanted Nico and she wanted him now, only she wasn't sure that was going to happen. She made an exasperated sound that was part groan, part whine and then pulled one of the glasses toward her. "Damn." She took a sip.

"What was that all about?" He gave her a quizzical look. "Are you seriously whinging?"

She cocked a brow over the rim of her glass, swallowed and then lowered the glass. "Did you seriously just get all British on me?" She laughed.

He moved around the counter and pressed against her from behind. His hands rested beside her arms and his hips pressed into her ass. The sweet curve felt so good against him he almost moaned. He was still thick and heavy. He ducked his head to her ear. "Dani, are you pushing me?" His voice was low, with just a hint of threat.

The hand holding the wine glass shook as she raised it back to her lips. Nico brought up his hand and steadied it for her.

"Are you afraid of something Danielle?" His breath ghosted across the nape of her neck and as she drank his hand slid up her arm slowly.

She sipped the wine, struggling to keep her arm still and then lowered the glass to the counter. "No…" she cleared her throat.

"No, you aren't pushing me or no, you aren't afraid?" He brushed the hair off her neck and pressed a kiss there.

She shivered and flattened her palms on the counter. "I…" she licked her lips. "I'm not afraid."

He smiled and let his lips drag over her neck. Then he bit, sharply until she gasped. "So, you are pushing me, then." He licked the small hurt and pressed his palms over her hands as he ground his hips against the curve of her backside slowly, pressing her into the counter. He kissed to her ear and caught the tender curl between his teeth.

She shook her head and gasped. "No." She let her head fall back onto his shoulder and she looked up at him. The rest of her movement was limited by his hands on hers and his hips against her ass. "Please…" Her voice was desperate and heavy with need.

His left hand slid from hers. "Don't move." He kissed the side of her neck and he rocked against her from behind as his hand moved down between her legs.

She gasped and sobbed in relief when his fingers pressed against the seam of her jeans. Her hands curled against the counter and her knees shook. "Oh…god…"

He saw his own need reflected back at him in her eyes, but there was more in hers, something else. He rubbed over her. "How close are you, baby?"

She whimpered and rocked into his hand. She pressed a kiss into the curve of his neck. "Close…Nico, please."

Nico knew the kitchen wasn't any better than the deck, but Dani was going to be the death of him. "Keep both hands on the counter. Understand me?"

"Yes." She nodded, desperately. "Anything…just…please."

"Anything?" He slid his right hand down to her fly and unbuttoned her jeans and then undid the zipper. "If I make you cum Dani, what do I get?" The hand between her legs paused.

She groaned in frustration. "Whatever you want…anything Nico." She found his eyes. "Please…touch me."

He smiled and kissed her and as he did his hand slid into her panties. Two fingers circled her clit as his tongue slid over hers. He rubbed softly and then pressed upward, sliding them inside, but ensuring that they would ride over her clit with each thrust of his hand. He moved his hand and deepened the kiss.

Dani moaned into his mouth. Finally. Her body was burning and she was so close she was shaking. She rocked forward into his hand and shivered at the feel of Nico's heavy cock against her ass. God, she'd die if he bent her over and fucked inside her right now. She clenched around his fingers and pulled her mouth from his to catch her breath. "Oh…holy…shit…"Her head fell onto the counter. "Nico…"

Nico increased his pace and bent over her. "You're close, I feel it…" He whispered in her ear. "Later Dani, after you cum, remember you promised me whatever I want." He withdrew his fingers and swirled them over her clit until she whimpered.

"More…please." She looked up at him. "Don't stop, god don't stop."

He slid one finger back inside her and he continued to rub her clit with his thumb.

She strained against him, frustration mounting again and then he added the other finger and the pressure in her belly built back up. She moaned soft and panted short and sweet against his bicep. He was still wearing his wool coat and it was rubbing against the flesh of her belly. "Nico…Nico, please, yes."

"You're going to cum right here in the kitchen Dani…right now." He pumped his fingers harder and pressed them deep and found the spot he knew she liked and when her head arched back he smiled down at her. "There you go baby…you are so beautiful, so damn sexy."

She whimpered when it hit her. There was nothing else to do. No moaning or thrashing. Her entire body tightened around her core and then she went limp as waves pulsed outward. She leaned heavy against the counter. Nico's hand was still awkwardly inside her; stroking her slowly, easing her down. She didn't protest when he withdrew, she wasn't sure she could have. She straightened and turned around to face him. A particularly strong aftershock hit her and she smiled, her eyes shut and she purred. "Mm, wow, I needed that." She pressed against him, took his hand and pulled it to her mouth.

He watched as she let her tongue trace over the fingers he'd just had inside her. Damn, it reminded him of exactly what he wanted her to do right now. Only he wanted her on her knees looking up at him. His cock jerked at the mental image, and then jerked again, even stronger when she took both fingers into her mouth, swirled her tongue around them and sucked. "Dani…you're going to make me worthless later." He pulled his hand away and pulled her into his arms. He kissed her gently as he readjusted her jeans. He had just finished that task and deepened the kiss as his hands slid to her hips when they heard someone behind them.

"Yo…whoa…already?"

They jumped apart.

"Ray Jay!" Dani put a hand on her chest. "You scared the hell out of me."

He glanced at the two of them and smirked before pulling open the fridge. "Yea, well how about not doing that in the kitchen just yet, because it icks the hell out of me." He pulled out cold cuts, mustard and a bottle of water. He shut the fridge and grabbed some bread. "You want a sandwich Nico?"

Nico shook his head in disbelief. "No." He looked to Dani. "Didn't we just eat about two hours ago?"

She nodded and took another sip from her wine glass. "Yes, and this is normal. He eats like he's never eaten, but look at him." She waved a hand in her son's direction. "It's not like he's overweight."

Ray Jay took a bite of his sandwich and raised his shirt to flex his abs. "Working on an eight pack…" he chewed and smiled at the same time which was kind of disgusting. "Already have the six." He slapped his stomach and then dropped his shirt. He turned and put the rest of cold cuts back in the fridge. "You two," He pointed at Nico and Dani after he closed the refrigerator door and just before he picked up his water, "Keep it PG in the common areas will you?" He started to leave and then stopped. He turned around with a smirk. "Oh and mom, if you need any…ah protection, you can borrow because you know, I got you covered." He snickered when she turned red.

Nico couldn't help but chuckle, but he wasn't letting the kid off that easy either. "Ray Jay, just so you know, next Sunday you're here we're running five miles." He held up five fingers. "I'm sure it will help with that eight pack and all."

The wind dropped out of Ray Jay's sails a bit. "Come on…four was enough…" He turned and pouted. "Shoulda kept my damn mouth shut." He took a bite of his sandwich and jogged up the stairs.

Nico glanced at Dani, she looked tired and if he admitted it, so was he. Gabrielle had worn him down. He reached around her and picked up his glass. He finished off what was left, which wasn't much, and set the glass back down. He looked at the clock.

"It's not quite eleven." He tucked her against his side and stood there. "You look tired."

She yawned about then. "I'd be lying if I said I wasn't."

He pulled back to look at her. "I don't want you to ever lie to me, even about little things like being tired." He kissed her temple. "I can always change your mind about how tired you are." He winked at her.

She took his hand and moved toward the stairs.

He resisted. "What are you doing?"

"Taking you to bed." She turned to look at him. "I figured if we were talking about being tired, we were considering bed?"

"I am, but," He pointed toward her office. "That's my room."

She smiled and shook her head. "It was before the kids knew about us…" she knew she was blushing again. "Damn, I'm doing it again." She pressed her hands to her cheeks. "They know, so why should you sleep down here now?"

He tugged her into his arms. "So, I'm invited to your bed now…officially?"

She nodded. "If you want to?" Her voice was shy. "Maybe I shouldn't assume it's something you'd be comfortable with."

His hands framed her face. "I want to Dani, there's no place I'd rather be, except maybe my bed with you in it." He kissed her nose and then her forehead. "Something about seeing you in my bed…waiting for me." He closed his eyes against the thought and pressed himself against her belly. When he opened his eyes it took a second to focus. His fingertips slid over her brows and cheeks so soft and light he barely touched her.

She shivered and slid her arms up and around his neck. She bit her lip. The thought of being in his bed, surrounded by everything that was Nico made her weak. "How can you make such mundane things sound so damn erotic?"

He smiled and shook his head. "It's not mundane Dani." He smoothed her hair down her back. "It holds a lot of meaning to me. I've never had a woman in that bed, never wanted one there, but you…I want you in it. I want to see you under me." He took a breath. "God, I want more and you made me a promise earlier, so tomorrow, after we drop Juliette off we are going to my place." He pulled her tight against him. He couldn't resist kissing her. He took what he needed and left her breathless by the time he pulled back. He looked her in the eye. "Tomorrow Dani I am holding you to your promise and I'm taking what I want, but tonight…" He smiled and took her hand. He led her up the stairs.

"What about tonight?" She asked quietly as they got to the top of the steps and headed toward her bedroom. "I thought you were tired."

"I was…I am, but not too tired to make love to you." He pushed the door closed behind them and backed her toward the bed. "I doubt I'd manage to sleep with you beside me and the small problem that won't go away."

She slid her hands under his coat and pushed it from his shoulders. It dropped to the floor. "You have way too many clothes on. You know that right?"

He nodded, toed off his loafers and reached up to work his tie loose while Dani started on the buttons of his shirt. "God, yes I know." He dropped the tie and as she continued to work on his shirt he untied the belt to her sweater and eased his hands under the hem of her shirt. He moved his hands upward, bunching the fabric as he went. "Hands up." He nudged and Dani paused her tugging his shirt from his pants and raised her hands so he could pull the shirt and sweater over her head together. He tossed both to the floor and went to work on her bra. It was gone in seconds and then his hands were filled with her breasts.

She moaned and her hands paused against his belly. Her nails dug in slightly when he rolled her nipples. She looked up at him, her lips parted and her eyes heavy but sleep completely forgotten now. She kept her eyes on his face as he watched his hands move over her. Her nipples were more sensitive than usual, probably from him teasing them earlier and she inhaled sharply when he pulled harder.

His lips lifted at one corner, "Come here." He took her hand and turned. He walked the two steps to the bed and sat before he pulled her down to straddle his lap. A growl escaped him as he nuzzled her neck and then he ducked lower and pulled a pert nipple into his mouth. His tongue teased and he sucked loving the way Dani gripped his shoulders and leaned backward. He used his teeth to graze the sensitive flesh.

She moaned and bucked against him. It felt like a direct current between her clit and breast. "Yes…" her hands moved to his head and through his hair and she couldn't stop the sound of disappointment when he pulled away from her breast.

He looked up at her and smiled. "Shh," He pressed a kiss between her breasts. "You have a set." He plucked the nipple he'd just left with his fingers. "I have to give equal attention to the other." His mouth moved to her other breast and he smiled around her nipple when she moaned again.

She rocked her hips against him and then leaned forward. She kissed the side of his neck and moved her hips again. "Mm," She smiled and reached down to nudge his chin. She wanted to kiss him. He didn't let go at first and then his teeth scraped her nipple roughly and very slowly his head came up. "Ahh…shhh…" She reached to grab her offended breast with a gasp.

"Oh no, you don't." He grabbed her hand with a wicked smile. "You wanted me to stop…" He shifted positions, both her hands now in one of his, and rolled her under him onto the bed. He captured her mouth and kissed her. His tongue darting in and out quickly and teasingly as his right knee moved up between her legs to press there. He slid his chest against hers, dragging her nipples across his chest hair. He knew it would only increase the friction on her already sensitive nipples.

She was gasping into his mouth. She was overwhelmed with the stimulation; her breasts, the knee between her legs, the kiss. What the hell was he doing now? She pulled her mouth from his. "Please…" she panted, her head turned to the side, "Nico, please let me touch you."

He let go of her hands and looked down at her. "How did I get so lucky?" He kissed her softly and then rolled them over so she was on top. His shirt was open, but still on and she smiled as he gripped her hips to settle her where he wanted her. Then he dropped his hands outward. "I'm all yours Dani."

She swallowed and let her eyes roam over him. "You're what?" She ran her nails through the curling hair on his chest and smiled at the rumble she felt through his chest. She scratched over his nipples and lower.

Nico's breath caught as Dani's nails slid over his chest and down his sides. She skimmed his hipbones and then she was working his belt and fly open. It was a delicious torture and he watched her, but he wanted her naked. "Dani, take your pants off for me." He reached up, found a pillow and tucked it behind his head so he had a better view.

She looked up at him, her hair had fallen forward and she pushed it out of her face. She bit her lower lip and went up on her knees. She ran her hands over her breasts as he watched and then skimmed her hands over her sides to her jeans. She worked them open and tugged them down her hips slowly. The entire time she kept her eyes on Nico's face.

He watched almost breathless as she went up on her knees and then she paused and went finish opening his fly. He frowned and took her hand. "Dani, get your pants off first."

"I will." She smiled and slid down his legs to the bottom of the bed. She stood and worked her pants off, then she giggled and pulled his socks from his feet before crawling back up kneel beside him. She placed a kiss at his navel and gripped the sides of his pants as her tongue traced just above the line of his belt. She paused. "Lift up."

"Dani…" He gasped, but lifted his hips for her as she pulled the pants under him and then down and off. His cock lay thick and heavy against his belly and it twitched at the thought of her touching him. His eyes found hers. "I want you to touch me like you said you were going to." He kept his hands at his side, but bent his left leg. He said he was all hers, but he knew he was still in charge. "Touch me Dani."

She licked her lips. "You are so damn sexy." She ran her hands up his thighs and savored his shiver. Her eyes drifted shut as she remembered the way he'd touched himself. It had been such a huge turn on to her.

"What are you thinking about baby?"

She shook her head and shifted closer as she wrapped her hands around his shaft. His sigh made her smile. "The time you touched yourself and I watched… It turned me on." She slid her hand up his shaft, twisting her hand with the stroke and then running her thumb across the sensitive crown. She cupped his sac with her other hand and teased him gently with her fingertips as she continued to stroke him at a steady pace.

His breath gave in small hitched gasps and his hands fisted loosely as he watched her face. She was concentrating on her hands and he saw the heavy look in her eyes. He widened his legs and thrust up into her hands, but he wanted more. He still had the image of her mouth around him the other day in his head. "Dani…please…"

She looked up at him with a wicked smile and slowed her hands. She was surprised he hadn't moved. Usually by now he would have taken control, rolled her under him, but still he stayed where he was. She leaned against his leg and pressed and dragged her tongued against his bent knee.

He nodded. "I want your mouth baby. I haven't been able to get the thought of your lips around me out of my head."

"Nico, you're going to kill me." She shifted and in one quick movement took him into her mouth. Her tongue caressed the velvet softness that juxtaposed his hardness and she slid lower with a murmur of satisfaction. She kept up the gentle tease over his testicles and took him deep and then hollowed her cheeks as she raised her head.

With a groan, his hands rose to her head to grip her hair, his heels dug into the bed and he couldn't resist thrusting into her willing mouth. "Fuck me…shit…" His eyes were on her as she moved over him twice more and then he knew that was it. He reached down. "Dani, no more."

He pulled her away and then up his body to his mouth. His mouth was on hers in seconds. His mouth plundered hers. There was no seduction, no play, no give; he took and she just came along.

She was as eager as him and her hands were everywhere as once and her hips were grinding against his as he rolled her under him. When he moved his mouth down her throat she gasped and begged him for what she needed. Her words were desperate snips between kisses to his skin anywhere she could press them.

He pulled his head from her breast. "Condom?"

"Drawer." She pointed to the left and bit his shoulder as her hand cupped him again and she moaned when his fingers dipped inside her. She arched into his touch. "Hurry…please."

He smiled, kissed her and sat up. He shed his shirt and pulled open the drawer. His eyebrow rose, and he smirked to himself, and he'd remember the pink vibrator for later, but he reached over it and pulled a condom from a box. He shut the drawer, took a few seconds to put the condom on and then was back to Dani.

He settled himself between her legs and kissed her long and hard while he teased her with his fingers until she was begging him and pulling at his hips. Then he slid inside and paused.

She panted up at him with a groan. "What's wrong?" Her hands slid around his shoulders and her hips pressed up into his. She gasped at the sensation.

He smiled and shifted a bit to one hip, resting on his elbow and pushed Dani's hair from her eyes. He shook his head. "Nothing's wrong." He rocked forward and trailed two fingers over her collarbone and the tops of her breasts. "You are just so damn beautiful." He pulled back and thrust again, loving the way the pleasure shot across her face, like a surprise. "You look so shocked every time I do that…like you forgot how good it felt the time before." He kissed her nose and moved again.

She hissed this time when it pushed her longing up another notch. "It feels better each time." Her hands moved down his shoulders and lower to his waist. "I love touching you…"

He closed his eyes and thrust a few times in rhythm. He felt her body tighten around him and her leg slid up over his hip. He opened his eyes, trailed a hand over that leg and then found her eyes. "I love you Dani Santino." He bent and kissed her. It was soft and gentle and when he pulled back he was surprised to see tears in her eyes. "I love you…so damn much baby." He kissed her cheeks and moved against her until she gasped and groaned. He kissed down her neck suddenly wanting to and needing more.

She gripped his hips and moved with him. He made her feel and fuck if he didn't make her so turned on by telling her he loved her. She threw her head back and worked toward him. "Nico…my god…" She strained up against him, needing to be closer, to feel him as close as possible. She pulled his head to hers and found his eyes. "I…" She was crying and she didn't know why. She felt so much. Then he reached between them and touched her and she felt everything about to come undone. "I'm gonna cum."

"I know." He thrust harder, pushed her over the edge. "Do it baby." He stroked her and felt it when she did. He didn't wait because he couldn't. He buried his head beside hers and thrust hard, his hands gripping her hips in a punishing grasp and then his head flew back with a gasp and he came.

He collapsed beside her, still half inside her and tried to catch his breath. When he had some form of control he pulled out and rolled to the side of the bed. He sat up and pulled the condom off. He dropped in into the trash can.

Dani was hesitant, but she had unfinished business and it was between them. She moved behind Nico and wrapped her arms around him.

He smiled and wrapped his arms around hers. "Let me get the blankets pulled down?" He felt her nod against his back and then she slid from the bed.

"I'll be right back." She moved into the bathroom.

He frowned, but pulled back the blankets and lay down on his back. He pulled a sheet up over his waist. He closed his eyes. A minute later the light shut off and Dani's heat slid into bed beside him. She was instantly pressed against him and he smiled and turned to his side to curl around her, rolling her to her side as he did. "Mm, that's better."

She took his hand and pressed a kiss to it. "Miss me?"

He tucked his chin on her shoulder. "Always." He smoothed her hair out of his way.

She stayed where she was for a few minutes, until her eyes had adjusted to the darkness and then she shifted and turned so she could see him. "Nico?" She traced a finger over his jaw.

"Yea?" He pulled back to better see her face. He could see something swirling in her thoughts, it was written all over her face and in her eyes. His own thoughts were roiling. He'd said his peace, and he was pretty damn sure he knew what Dani felt, but she hadn't said what he wanted to hear. She was so close and even though he told himself those words meant so little. Actions speak louder. He'd said that and really, after every one of Dani's actions, every damn thing she had done showed him she really did love him, but he was fooling himself. He wanted to hear it from her lips. It did mean something. He watched her face and absently ran his fingertips up her arm.

"You need to know something." She bit her lip. "I told you earlier so much and it was everything really, all of it true, but I didn't say what I felt." She took a breath and then brushed her lips across his tenderly before pulling back. "You make me feel everything so much more than I ever have before. You make me so alive and god, in bed there are no words for what you do to me…" she paused, "and yes I'm sure I'm blushing again." She giggled and then kissed him again this time a bit playfully. "I can't explain how I feel. It makes me feel that everything I had before was counterfeit in some way and that amazes me. I know one thing." She swallowed and took his hand. She pressed it against her chest and looked into his eyes. She was crying and a tear ran down her cheek. She blinked and another fell. "I love you. You are the sexiest, most loyal, loving man I have ever known and you amaze me." She hiccupped and wiped her eyes. "I need you in my life and everything that comes with it."

He stared at her. His throat was thick with emotion and then he pulled her against him and then he was kissing her. "I love you…" He kissed her nose. "I love you so much Dani and thank you for loving me back, you just made me so happy." He kissed her cheek. He smiled and kissed her again. He crushed her to his chest. He felt like his heart would burst and then he felt ridiculous for it. He settled her against her chest. "Let's get some sleep. We have a lot to do tomorrow."

She sighed and got comfortable. She was asleep before she knew it.

Nico closed his eyes and tried to sleep, but every time his thoughts swirled to how lucky he was and how worried he still was. He knew Juliette still had a lot of work to do. Dani and his relationship wasn't out of the woods and things were a long way from perfect. Then just when he settled down, his thoughts drifted in an entirely different direction and his groin tightened. He rolled both of them to their sides and tried to ignore the heat that settled in his gut. He kissed her temple and whispered. "Tomorrow baby…tomorrow."

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR 

Nico was up, back from his run and just about to get out of the shower when Dani poked her head into the bathroom. He saw her. "You want me to leave the water on?"

She mumbled yes and climbed in as he climbed out. "You are annoyingly chipper in the morning."

He kissed her cheek and then closed the shower door behind him. "I'm used to a routine and try to stick with it no matter where I am." He dried off as he talked. He'd already shaved and the coffee was made. He only needed to finish up, dress and eat. He leaned against the sink and watched Dani through the slightly frosted glass. He wouldn't have minded showering with her, but he knew it would only have led to them having sex again and he was trying to avoid that for the moment. He toweled his hair dry and combed it back. "Did you sleep well?"

"Actually, yes." She was rinsing her hair. "I didn't think I would, but something about you beside me…I don't know, you're like valium." She laughed. "At least when I'm sleepy."

He pulled his shaving kit open and finished his grooming. "I'm glad I'm not that snooze inducing all the time." He knew what she meant. She made him feel content also, but he couldn't shake the feeling something was going to happen and he didn't ignore those feelings. Ever.

The water stopped. "Can you hand me a towel?"

He left the sink and pulled a towel from the shelf. He opened the shower door and held it up for her and then wrapped it around her with his arms when she stepped into it. He pulled her against him and hugged her. He pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I love you."

She smiled up at him as she looped her arms around his neck. "I'm getting you all wet again and I love you too."

He shrugged. "I don't care. I'm amazingly waterproof." He pressed against her. He was obviously interested. "And, hopefully I'm getting you at least a little bit…" He bit at her ear as he added suggestively, "wet?"

She chuckled, low in her throat. "Always, just looking at you makes me that way. You're like female Viagra." She winked at him.

He laughed and stepped away. "You are dangerous to be around. We don't have time this morning. We have to get the kids off to school and Juliette to rehab by nine thirty. We need to move."

She nodded and stepped back. "Okay, then let me get ready."

He smiled and left the bathroom to get dressed.

Dani found him twenty minutes later in the kitchen making pancakes.

"So, omelets and now pancakes?"

He smiled at her and put two on Juliette's plate. "Don't get too impressed, this is Aunt Jemima's recipe." He pointed at the box on the counter. "My only addition is nutmeg and some cinnamon."

Ray Jay shrugged. "Beats cold cereal," he forked a half a pancake into his mouth with a smile. "Bacon would go nice with 'em, but…"

"Ray Jay, don't talk with your mouth full, please." Dani slapped his shoulder and then poured herself a cup of coffee. "Where's your sister?"

He shrugged. "Beats me." He looked at Juliette. "She was doing her hair, you saw her last."

Juliette looked up from her pancakes. She'd eaten about half of one and was pushing the rest around her plate. "She said she'd be down in a minute."

About then, Lindsay came down the stairs. "Whoa, food?" She looked at Nico at the stove and shook her head. "I vote we keep him." She picked up a pancake and ate it like a cookie. "Oh, they're good without syrup too." She poured a glass of juice and drank. "Mom, I'm going to Libby's house after school to work on a history project. Ray Jay said he'd pick me up at six. Cool with you?"

Dani looked at Ray Jay and he nodded. "Yea, it's on the way home from practice, so no big deal."

"That's fine." She looked at the clock. "You two better head out."

Lindsay nodded. "Crap, come on Ray Jay." She grabbed her bag off the table and kissed Dani's cheek. Then she turned to Nico and kissed his too. "Thanks for breakfast." She hugged Juliette. "See you next weekend and I'll miss you."

Juliette hugged her back. "I'll miss you too."

Ray Jay just waved at everyone. "Bye. Love you mom. See you two later and thanks for the breakfast big guy."

Nico stood there with an odd look on his face and shook his head. "Okay, well I guess that went well."

Juliette rolled her eyes at him. "They like you, but then you're impossible not to like." She pushed her plate away and pulled her coffee closer with a sigh. "What time does my sentence start?"

Dani frowned. "It's not a sentence Juliette and you know that." She looked to Nico. She'd been hoping this morning would go smoothly, but she had a feeling it wouldn't be quite as smooth as she thought.

Nico set the last of the pancakes on a plate and turned off the stove. "We told Corinne we'd have you there by nine thirty." He sat on the stool beside her and took her hand. "You know you have to do this to get well and I know you want to do that. You've been telling me that for the past week Juliette." He kissed her hand when she squeezed it desperately.

She nodded at him. "I do, but it feels like a family here. For the first time in my life I feel like I might have a place that I belong and people that want me around and care if I'm not." She looked from Dani to Nico and then back at her coffee. "I just don't want lose that."

Dani moved and hugged her. "Juliette," she pushed the girl's hair from her face so she could see her eyes. "Look at me." When she did she continued. "You are a part of this family for as long as you want to be and no matter where you go, you aren't going to lose that. We aren't going to forget you." She took a breath and glanced at Nico. "Last night Nico told me he loved me and I told him, I'm not going anywhere. Okay?"

She smiled and nodded and then she hugged Dani back. "It's about damn time." She looked at Nico and turned to hug him too. "Don't let her go. I like you happy old man."

He hugged the girl he loved like his own daughter. "I like me happy too and I have intention of letting her go." He said as he watched Dani's face over Juliette's shoulders. "You'll be home on the weekends Juliette, we have that figured out. You'll be here, with us."

She nodded. "I get it and fine, but I'm not going to like it." She sighed. "I'm going to take a shower and get my shit packed then." She carried her cup with her out of the kitchen.

Dani sat and sipped her already cooling coffee. She eyed Nico as she did. He was dressed up a bit more than she'd expect for a Monday. "What's with the tie?"

He shrugged. "It's all I packed." He cut a pancake with the side of his fork and speared it. "You gonna eat?" He motioned to Dani's plate.

She nodded and started on her pancakes, but was still trying to figure out why he'd pack a dress shirt and tie for Monday. He had off on Monday. "Do you have an appointment later today you need to dress for?"

His eyebrows pulled together and he shook his head. "Dani, why the sudden interest in my attire?"

"You have off today. I figured you'd want a more relaxed look." She ate some more and then drank her coffee. "I mean, trust me I love you in a designer shirt, silk tie and I'm sure there will be a jacket, but…" She shrugged. "I mean you look so damn hot that way it drives me crazy…"

He smiled behind his coffee mug. "So, how about you drive me crazy and put on a dress? I want something loose in the skirt, tight in the top and I'd like some boots this time Dani." His voice was quiet. His request was more an order.

She swallowed. "Okay." She noticed the smokiness in his eyes. "I think I can arrange that." Instant heat hit her belly, and if she could she'd decide to spend the entire day in bed with him. She glanced at the clock and finished off her coffee. "I'll go change then."

"Yes, you better." He kept his eyes on her. His gaze was heavy and dark and on her the entire time until she was gone. He wanted to follow her up the stairs, but he knew that would be dangerous. He just needed to bide his time.

The drive the clinic was mostly quiet, though Juliette did chat. She asked Nico if he'd be spending more time at Dani's place. Which honestly was something he hadn't thought much about and it hit him that they hadn't talked about it. He obviously wasn't going to give up his apartment. He loved it, but he also knew it wasn't practical for Dani to live anywhere other than where she was living. He figured for now, he'd split his time. But, if he were honest with himself he did not want to spend much time away from Dani. He told Juliette he had no plans on moving and that seemed to satisfy her. He also had Onyx to deal with. Of course the cat was used to him being gone for days at a time.

Dani seemed intrigued with the question, if not with his answer. He figured she had similar thoughts on the subject as he did and now that their relationship seemed to be moving forward she was hoping that they would be spending more time together. Of course, moving in together after a week, well even he had to admit that was a bit quick on anyone's scale. Though, sleeping over was already a well-established habit he felt they were cultivating.

They'd figure things out as they went. This was new to all of them. He was just happy it was actually happening. He parked the car and got Juliette's bags from the trunk. He watched as Dani put her arm around the girl and took her toward the door. He was proud of both of them and he loved them both. God, he felt like a father and he his heart ached at the same time for the girl. He knew this was hard for her. He followed them up the stairs and into the building.

Dani was already in Corinne's office, so he didn't hesitate to enter after he set the bags down with the woman at the front desk. A guard took them immediately and he knew they would be searched before they were put in Juliette's room. He also knew they wouldn't find anything, but policy was policy and he was okay with it because it kept everyone safe.

He took the chair beside Dani and then took her hand when she slid her hand toward him. He was grateful for it and squeezed.

Corinne looked at him. "Mr. Careles. I think all of our paperwork is in order. Dr. Santino brought Juliette in earlier, so she knows her way around." She looked over to Juliette and then back to Nico. "Do you have any questions though?"

Nico shook his head. "Dani ensures me Juliette will get excellent care and from I see with Mr. King I would agree." He looked over at Juliette and then reached into his pocket. He put her medications on the desk. "Here are her drugs. As per our agreement, we will be picking her up on Fridays and have her back here on Mondays."

Corinne took the medications and nodded. "Of course," she looked to Juliette and then stood. "I'll give you all a few minutes to say goodbye and then you can walk Juliette to her room." She glanced at the clock and then handed Juliette a schedule. "Group is at ten. You'll be expected to be there and it's in the great room." Corinne stood and waited for them to follow her. "Dani, you know your way around."

Dani nodded and then they were in the lobby again.

Juliette stood there unsure and then she smiled hesitantly. "Shit, this feels like when mom and dad dumped me at camp or boarding school." She took Dani's hand and hooked her arm in Nico's and headed toward the stairs. "Come on, let's get this over with then."

_Later…_

Juliette sat on the bed. She was surprised that there was now a high quality plum colored down comforter, Egyptian cotton sheet set and five throw pillows on the bed. Nico said he had sent it over along with a few other items that he'd had okayed with Corinne beforehand. There was also a dozen roses and handwritten card. It read. _Good Luck, Get Well. Love - N._ She hadn't expected that and it had brought tears to her eyes.

There was a knock on her door just before it opened and she jumped.

"Hey, Jules how's it shaking babygirl?" TK slid inside her room, but left the door open. He didn't hesitate to sit beside her on the bed.

She smiled. "I'm pretty good. How are you?"

He shrugged. "Same as before I guess. I mean I'm breathing and getting by, but I'm still here so I guess that means I'm not great yet. Right?"

She nodded. "I guess so." She looked around her room and checked the clock. "I guess we have group in five minutes then."

"Yep, we get to spill our innermost secrets and make each other cry." He nudged her knee lightly. "You're the new girl." He gave her wide smile. "Some of them can be pretty hard on the newbies, but you got me to watch your back and you aren't gonna be all uppity like I was when I got here, now are you?" His eyebrow shot up and before she could answer he stood and held out his hand. "Come on, let's head down. There's coffee and maybe if we get there first we can get a seat on the couch and not a hard chair."

She took his hand and let him pull her up. She didn't complain when his arm slid loose around her shoulder, but she shot him a look. "You like the King around here TK?" She asked sarcastically

He laughed and held up the large gaudy gold charm hanging around his neck. "It is my last name baby and I do wear the crown." He hugged her to his side and let his arm dropped as she locked up her room and then they headed down the stairs.

She sat while TK got them both coffee and she stared out the window with her arms crossed. She'd done this whole thing before and she hated it. She knew how it worked, she figured it probably helped, but it didn't mean she liked it. She'd rather sit in Dani's office and work through her shit. She sighed and looked up when someone sat beside her. She thought it was TK, but it wasn't. It was another woman.

She was thin; too thin really. Her hair was pale blond and lank and it hung down her back like she didn't care, which considering the fact this was rehab she probably didn't. She looked sick. Hell, she looked like she needed a hit in the worst way and Juliette knew how that felt. The woman was older than Juliette, probably in her upper thirties, but it was hard to tell once the drugs got a hold of you. Juliette smiled at her. The woman scowled.

"Great another princess." She glared at Juliette and pulled the sleeves of her robe down over her hands. "Just what we need someone else who doesn't know what it really feels like. I'm sick of daddy sending these weekend users here because he's worried his precious little girl might become a tweeker or because her parole officer said she needed some rehab." She spat it out with venom and just glared at Juliette.

"Back off Jen, you don't know jack shit about her, so how about you wait until you do?" TK was there and he motioned for Juliette to move over and then sat down between the two women. He handed Juliette her coffee. "I know her and she has just as much right to be here as you, and more than me, so shove it up your ass."

Jen stared at him. "T, you're as much an addict as any of the rest of us and you were there with Jimmy." She started to tear up and wiped her eyes on her robe. "So, don't say that, but her," she snorted, "Look at her, she's obviously not using heavy, or she's clean now and don't tell me daddy's not rich." She looked Juliette up and down.

Juliette was crying now, quiet sobs and she had pressed her face against TK's side to hide that fact. He turned and wrapped an arm around her. "Whoa, hey babygirl…it's okay. She's a bitch all the time, even to the people she knows." He turned to glare at Jen. "She has no fucking idea that your father just killed himself, or any other fucking clue about anything." He turned back to Juliette and kissed her hair as he whispered things to calm her down. "It's all okay baby, shh." He took the coffee cup from her when it splashed onto his knee. "Okay, that's damn hot and not in a good way."

She giggled and sat up to wipe her eyes. "I'm glad you're here. I don't think I could do this without knowing someone and even though I don't know you that well, you worked for dad's team and I've met you before so I feel like I've known you longer than I have."

Jen stared at Juliette. "Oh shit. You're like _that_ Juliette?"

"Should it matter who I am?" Juliette glared at the woman.

"Well, I figured you were just some spoiled rich kid, I mean you're obviously some rich kid, but like shit, everyone here's got money…I just…well…" She shrugged and then got up and moved to a chair across the room. She slumped into it and crossed her arms. She still glared at Juliette, but at least she wasn't openly hostile.

TK squeezed Juliette's hand. "Ignore her ass Jules. She's just bitter because no one likes her." He leaned back into the couch and stretched his arms along the back of the couch, his legs straight in front of him ankles crossed. He rolled his head on the back of the couch to look at the girl beside him. "You just stick with me and you'll be fine. She's the worst of them." He nodded to the doorway as a middle aged man in a grey sweater came in. "Bert there, he's not bad. He has a problem with alcohol." He pointed out everyone as they joined the group.

By the time Corinne joined them, Juliette had at least an idea of who everyone was and what their drug of choice was. There were now eleven of them in the group. Only four, if you counted Juliette, were women. Corinne had everyone introduce themselves and then asked Juliette to explain why she was there.

She picked up her coffee and took a sip of it and then looked to TK. He nodded and flashed her a smile. She had to admit, having someone on her side in rehab was new to her and she liked it. She took a breath. "Like I said, I'm Juliette, what I didn't say before was that my last name, but since you'll all figure it out soon enough, it's Pittman. You know as in, my dad owned the New York Hawks, and just recently died in a plane crash." She hugged herself and bit her lip. "I've been using drugs, alcohol and sex to escape ever since I can remember…sex and alcohol first, marijuana, then legal shit. It started with pills from psychiatrists. You know, I was depressed. Life with my parents sucked. So, go see a shrink and here's a few pills. Xanax and Klonopin, Ambien and Valium and whatever else they think you might need to keep you from freaking out. A different doctor in a different city, one in every country and no one ever paid attention to what the other prescribed. No one ever paid attention if I stole from my mother. No one cared if I was a zombie, as long as I wasn't getting into trouble."

She looked up from her lap to see the women nodding at her, even Jen. She took a big breath and continued. "It made me feel better, but not completely. The men helped some. I liked the boys for the most part, but they made me feel bad about what I did with them, but then one of them gave me some pills and that shit was good. Vics and oxies…then I started snorting and using more." She closed her eyes, reliving the highs. "Floating, fuzzy, no pain, no feelings except wrapped in warm and cotton," her eyes opened and she winced, "you all know what comes next though." They nodded and murmured. "The pain, the sweats, the puking." She wrapped her arm around her gut. "I would beg for more and do anything they asked to get it. I hated myself then. Hated who I was and who I became, and it was then that I met a guy who taught me to shoot up and introduce me to heroin. Nice guy. He took away the last shred of who I was." She wiped her eyes. "So, here I am. I lost my dad. My mom has disowned me. I hit bottom, but I did find something. I found I have friends who are more like family than my real family and who love me to death. That's why I'm here. I want to get clean so I can have for the rest of my life. I don't want what I've had. I want what I never had a chance at, but I know I need to change to get there. So, here I am."

She looked around the room, meeting each eye. Everyone nodded at her, even Jen grudgingly nodded and then looked down at her sleeves.

Corinne smiled at her. "Juliette, I wasn't sure about having you in our group, but I will say, you've made good progress with Dr. Santino. Let's hope things keep progressing from here." She picked up a stack of papers and handed them to her left. "Now, here's today's topic, let's get started."

**NOTE: Nico's holding Dani to her promise, but it's not going to fit the framework of this story because I have terribly dirty mind ;) You guys love it! Those bits fit into my Shades side story...so if you want to see her promise fulfilled you will find it there. Hopefully, soon. It is possible it will be later today, but it might not be up until Tuesday. I work half a day Tuesday, so if I don't finish the edit today, I will then. It will be done before Thanksgiving here stateside. That is Nov. 22 for all of you non USA readers. -Thanks for reading, reviewing and all of that! **


	18. I Wanna Do Bad Things to You

**_NOTE:_**Same old stuff, you know...no beta, yada, yada.

This was late due to Thanksgiving travel, but I'm home and I'm happy to be here. Traffic wasn't as horrible as I thought it would be. I'm happy it wasn't...now going east for some reason, I felt sorry for those people. If you were one of them, well I am sorry. LOL, you were in line in the PA turnpike forever! **  
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Hope holidays were good for everyone who celebrated them and if you didn't, hope you had a good weekend.

This chapter went a different direction because it was supposed to...it was all in the grand plan, oh there's always a plan, still is, always is. I occasionally tweak it, but overall it is planned out. For example, that last chapter of Shades, yea, that was pretty spontaneous...sometimes the sexiness gets a bit out of control. Eh, or I get inspired. You can thank a muse, she pokes me every once in a while. Or maybe it's the weird dreams she sends me. Just don't ask me to explain them (her explanations aren't much better). The plot though, that I have planned out, so this was planned. Okay, so angst...check...so get thee to some reading.

Oh, writing/editing this week...um, yea. You guys might be disappointed, but my favorite author in the entire world's newest book is coming out and I'll be obsessively devouring his book this week during my limited free time and means I probably will be behind on getting a chapter ready for posting. If you want to read great shit and haven't you should really, really start Jim Butcher's Dresden Files series.

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**I Wanna Do Bad Things to You**

Dani smiled as she dressed and then winced at the sharp pain when she sat to put on her boots , but even that couldn't completely wipe the smile off her face because immediately her nipples hardened and she was wet between her legs. She pressed her thighs together and realized she was sore there too and her breath caught. She let her eyes drift close so she could relive their afternoon together in her head.

Nico was in his office and he couldn't help but watch. He hadn't gone to his office with the intent to spy. He actually went to get online, pay bills and check his accounts, but once she'd left the bathroom to finish dressing she'd caught his eye. He'd stood and leaned against the waist high wall to watch her casually dividing his time between the correspondence in his hand and what she was doing in his room, but when her eyes closed and mouth fell open the mail was forgotten. He watched her grip the material of her skirt and pull it up her legs after she zipped her boots. Her thighs fell apart and one hand moved up the inside of her leg. God she was close to touching herself and he knew she was thinking about them together.

Which time he wasn't sure, because after he untied her and they'd napped, he'd taken her again. Slowly he had made love to her that second time. He had kissed her head to toe after driving her insane. He'd made her beg him. He'd learned every spot that was ticklish, every spot that made her moan and then he'd made her moan over and over again. He promised her a few things for the future. Things that she told him she didn't want, but when he'd mentioned them, her whole body had turned to liquid fire for him. Probably, like it was right now.

He shut his eyes and tried not to groan, and then he opened them and wished he could see more. He wanted to see, wanted to watch. Shit, her skirt was in the way, he couldn't quite see if she was touching herself, but her breathing was irregular and she was moving against her hand. She was obviously turned on and working on getting herself off. Now, he was turned on and he was forced to readjust himself as he watched her.

His phone rang.

Dani's eyes opened. The ringing phone jolted her back to reality. She saw Nico standing above her, staring at her from his office. "Oh hell…" She was completely embarrassed as she pulled her hand from between her legs and dropped her skirt. "I can't believe you just kept watching me." She glared up at him and then stood. She was glad she was finished with her boots. She tried to look dignified as she smoothed her skirt down carefully, but she knew it wasn't possible and she was moving a bit stiff because she was sore. She bit back a smile, moving reminded her of her day with Nico and she loved every little painful second of it, even if she didn't love the fact that right now she was hot and bothered and quite embarrassed.

He smiled down at her and pulled his phone from his pocket. "You looked so sexy Danielle and I wasn't about to interrupt." He checked the phone with a frown. "It's Ray Jay." Concern had crept into his voice. He accepted the call. "Ray Jay, what's wrong?"

Dani forgot her embarrassment and her discomfort and moved as quickly as she could up the loft stairs to Nico's office. She wanted to pull the phone from his hands and find out why Ray Jay called Nico and not her, but there actually might be a reason. It might be a guy thing. She needed to calm down.

She took a breath and waited. She listened and the more she heard, the more nervous she got.

"She wasn't at Libby's?" Nico's eyes met Dani's.

Dani's heart pounded in her chest and she stepped to Nico, touched his shoulder, felt his arm go around her and heard his voice rumble through her as he continued to speak to Ray Jay.

"Did you call the house? Her phone?" He rubbed Dani's back, soothing strokes up and down. "Did you check with your dad? Her other friends? Text her? Where are you now?"

Dani felt dizzy, something wasn't right. She could tell from the tension in Nico's body and the tone of his voice. There was something in Ray Jay's voice from what little she could hear of it. She had a million questions, but the dizziness and the sick feeling in her stomach kept her from asking them. That and she wanted Nico to get his answers. They were important and she knew he would ask the right ones, get the answers he needed and take the next steps. The right steps. It might be nothing. She might be home. Right? Dani kept a positive internal dialogue going.

"Okay, you go home and stay there, but if you don't see Ronnie or Tommy in the driveway circle the block until you do. Understand?" He paused and pulled Dani against him. "Good. If you hear from Lindsay call me or your mother right away, we'll do the same. Ray Jay be careful and don't stop anywhere."

He hung up the phone and immediately dialed again. "Tommy I need you and Ronnie over at Dr. Santino's right now. Get ahold of Ronnie, I don't care what she's in the middle of…pull her off it and move her in the other direction. I need one of you there in ten minutes. Lindsay Santino is missing and I think it has something to do with the Harper situation….Good. I'll wait to hear back from you then."

He pulled the phone from his ear and turned to face Dani.

Her vision was blurred by tears. "Nico, where is my daughter?"

"Dani calm down, we don't know yet." His hands moved from her shoulders to her biceps and he held her at arm's length so he could see her face. "You need to stay calm and listen. She didn't meet up with Libby so Libby assumed she went home. Ray Jay, of course, assumed she was at Libby's. He showed up to pick her up and she wasn't there. He called and texted she hasn't answered. He called home, she hasn't answered there either. He tried to call you, but your phone is in your purse and it must be on vibrate still from the museum because I haven't heard it."

Dani suddenly pulled away from him and ran down the spiral stairs to the living room, where her purse was on the couch. She pulled her phone from it and sure enough there were four calls and two texts from Ray Jay, but none from Lindsay. "Shit…shit." She threw the phone into her purse.

Nico had followed her back down the stairs. He was on the phone and asking to talk to the police, though he knew they probably wouldn't take him seriously. It hadn't been twenty four hours, but given the family involvement with the Harpers and the fact that Tyler had threatened them, he hoped that he could get someone to listen. If not he knew someone in the FBI office who might pay attention.

"Can I speak with Detective Carson please. It's about the Harper case." He took Dani's hand.

When Carson picked up he continued. "Ben, this is Careles. Yea. I was wondering, anything going on with the Harpers?" His eyes went wide and he realized why he'd been having that bad feeling. "Shit, fuck and damn you. I thought someone was supposed to give me a heads up." He stood and paced to the kitchen. He was pissed. "Really? Late last night. I told you I had a family I was worried about…in the line of fire, or at least who I thought that those kids were gonna look at it that way." He shoved a hand through his hair. "The kid, the youngest, he thinks that's what brought all this down on his family and now I have a missing girl and I'm pretty damn sure he's behind it…especially now that you tell me the brothers are both out…So, great job with that.."

He listened to Carson for several minutes. "No, she was last seen at three. It's now six twenty. No one has seen or heard from her since. She's not answering her phone, and don't tell me how to do my job Carson. I've been around the block before." He paused and listened. "Let me tell you what I need from you. I need you to call the school and then meet me there so we can review the security tapes now. If we don't figure out where she went ASAP…yea, you know as well as I do our window is closing…yes. Her mother is with me now. I have two people meeting her brother at the house. He's a smart kid and he knows what to do. My people are good, they'll check the house. The father's clean, but do your job. I understand. Mom's been in my bed all day and I have security feeds to show when we came in and out. Yea, well fuck you too. I'll meet you at the school."

"Did you have to tell him that?" Dani rushed at him as soon as he hung up.

He gathered her into his arms. "If this is a kidnapping Dani, family needs cleared as suspects. I'm your alibi, and I'm a damn good one so accept it." He pointed to the cameras that were directed at his front door. "We were filmed in the garage, the hall and then entering. They only pick up anything when the door is opened, so I can fuck you against it once it's closed and nothing, but leave it open and it catches everything." He smiled. "It will record us leaving as well. See, alibi and it sees us in the hall so you can't fool it just by opening it and closing it because you have to hit the hall and then the garage and while the elevator is clear the stairwell isn't." He picked up their coats. "Get your purse. We're going to the school."

_Later at the School…_

Nico broke the speed limit to get to the school and he hoped that the police were there well before he got there. He was glad when he saw that they were and as he suspected the school did not want to cooperate. Schools, like any other organization, didn't want police or other people viewing their security videos because you never knew what might actually show up on them, which was why you wanted an internal review prior to any external reviewers seeing the videos. If you needed to get a lawyer or come up with a defense you had time to do so.

He and Dani entered the school and moved past a couple uniformed officers and into the school office. They asked the middle aged woman at the desk if Ben Carson was there and she told them that he was with the principal, the school security officer and the head of the school board in the principal's office.

"Please tell them that Ms. Santino and Mr. Careles are here." Nico's voice was stern and quiet. His arm was around Dani shoulder and he kept her tucked to his side.

The woman looked up at him. "Mr. Buckner was adamant about not being disturbed sir. You can wait until he comes out." She pointed to a chair.

Nico ignored her and walked around the small dividing wall, moving Dani with him.

"Excuse me, excuse me sir…sir…hey…officers…officers…" She called to the officers in the hall.

He glared at her and kept moving past her. He smiled at the officer that moved toward him, but didn't stop. "Ben, I know you're in there." He put his hand on the knob to open the door as the officer reached him. He looked at the kid. "You had better let go of me right now. I'm here because I notified the police. If it weren't for me you wouldn't know a thing about this. Ben Carson knows I'm coming. We served together. He's an asshole, but he's a good cop, so hands off."

About then, the door opened and Ben stood on the other side. He waved the uniform off. "It's okay Tanner, he brought the girl's mom in." He looked around, saw Dani. "You must be her." He stepped to the side. "We haven't gotten far and we haven't seen a thing, but there's a bunch of footage to go through. It's gonna be a long night."

Nico frowned and moved into the room. He took Dani's hand and shook his head. "I need a diagram of the school."

A woman looked up at him with a disgusted look. "Who the hell are you?"

He gave her a long look and then looked at Ben. "School board?" When Ben nodded he dismissed her and looked at the other woman, who was already opening a laptop to pull up a schematic, and the man in the room. He quickly figured the man to the principal, Buckner, and the woman the head of security. He bent over the woman with the laptop.

"Careles, security specialist. Can you show me where on this map Miss Santino's last class was and then pull up the security feeds of that hallway at that time. Then I need the feed of the door she would have exited if she were planning on meeting Miss Wingate." He looked to the principal. "I assume they have assigned parking areas?"

The principal nodded. "Yes, lots, but not spaces. So Elizabeth Wingate is assigned…" He pulled up a list on a tablet computer and scrolled down. "Lot C. Lindsay would probably have left out the east door, it's closest from her locker. Try pulling up the second floor, yellow, in the six hundreds, Claire."

Claire nodded and typed some numbers into the computer and then some time codes. A picture of a mostly empty hall came up on the screen. She scrolled forward and suddenly kids swarmed the halls.

Nico watched. "What number is her locker?"

"Six twenty two." Dani's voice was quiet from behind him and he pulled her closer. "Six twenty two. It was Ray Jay's two years ago too."

Claire pointed. "It's on the right about a thirds of the way down the hall, should be before the water fountain."

"There." Dani pointed and jumped. "That's her."

Nico saw her a second later and watched as she stopped at her locker. She was with a couple of girls. She put books in her locker, picked up her backpack and then headed toward the stairs.

"I need to pick her up on the first floor." He watched her disappear on the stairwell.

Claire smiled, hit a button and then she was on the landing.

Nico patted her shoulder. "Good, she didn't stop to talk to anyone on the stairs. That's helpful."

The next shot was of her in the downstairs hall and she was headed toward an exit.

Buckner nodded. "That's the east exit. That would be closest to the lot Miss Wingate is assigned."

Lindsay made it out the door and then there was an external shot. It was wider, but she was heading toward the parking lot. Then she stopped.

"Why'd she stop?" Claire looked at the camera feed and worked to enlarge it.

"She's looking at her phone." Dani's voice was quiet.

Nico looked at her. "How do you know?"

"Her shoulders are slumped together. She's texting someone…Look she's done, now she'll move."

Sure enough a second later Lindsay moved again, not toward the parking lot, but toward the street.

"Where is she going?" Nico scanned the street. There were several cars parked along the curb. Mostly parents or boyfriends he was sure. Lindsay headed right to a new, silver Navigator. He looked at Dani. "Anyone you know drive a new Navigator?"

She shook her head. She couldn't think of anyone who drove one. She watched her daughter talk to the driver through the open passenger window and then shake her head, or at least that's what it looked like. Then she started to walk away. The vehicle pulled forward, it looked like it pulled onto the curb and then the back door opened and suddenly closed. Lindsay wasn't there and the SUV was pulling away from the curb. Just like that Lindsay Santino was kidnapped.

Dani didn't realize she was hyperventilating until she was swaying and Nico's voice sounded far away, like she was underwater.

"Dani…look at me…breathe out Danielle all the way. Like before baby, come on." Nico gripped her shoulders and tried to get her attention. Her eyes found his and he saw that at least she recognized she was panicked.

She tried to focus, but someone had her baby. She gripped Nico's shoulders. Her fingers dug into the wool. Her nails bent and clawed. She wanted to scream at someone to find her, help her. She looked past Nico, to the school security woman and the principal. Where had they been? Why hadn't they helped keep her safe? Her vision tunneled, she felt more desperate for air.

"What the hell is wrong with her?" The school board woman asked.

Nico growled and Ben had the decency to move everyone out of the office.

"Let him help her. Bring the laptop with the security feeds. We can get copies, maybe get a partial plate. We need more info on the vehicle." He shot Nico a look and then pushed everyone out of the office and pulled the door closed behind them.

Nico picked her up and moved her to the small, ugly vinyl couch against the wall. He sat with her cradled in his arms. "Dani enough," his voice was quiet but stern. "I need you to pull it together and so does Lindsay." He turned Dani's face into his shoulder and pressed firmly against the back of her head. "Slow your breathing down baby…slow and deep." He was forcing her to breathe into the thick wool of his coat, which made her breaths more difficult and slower. The wool also trapped more of her carbon dioxide, which she would rebreathe and it would balance her oxygen level…decrease her dizziness. "Stop fighting Dani." He held her still, but whispered into her hair that he loved her and that he was going to find Lindsay no matter what.

Dani fought him at first. It felt difficult to take a breath, but as she started to feel better she calmed down and relaxed into him. As her breathing slowed, he relaxed his hold and allowed her to pull her head from his shoulder. She still gripped his shoulders and when she could she looked at his face. "Nico…" She sobbed and tears ran down her face as she shook her head. "…He has…they have my baby…she's…" she stopped and pressed a hand to her mouth, she felt like she was going to throw up.

He knew what she was thinking. Tyler, Mason and their father were all arrested for sex crimes. Lindsay was a virgin. He closed his eyes. He already wanted both men dead for what they had done to Juliette and she'd been far from innocent when Mason had found her. If either of them laid a finger on Lindsay…he'd tear them limb from limb. He wouldn't care if it meant he'd spend eternity in prison.

"I'll make sure they pay if they hurt her Dani. I swear to you…If they touch her that way. They won't ever touch another woman again." His voice was dead. Cold. Calm.

Dani scrambled off his lap as the nausea overwhelmed her. She barely made it to the small trashcan beside the desk and her stomach emptied. She didn't want Nico to do that, as much as she wanted her daughter back. She did not want Nico to have to compromise himself that way. She heaved again.

Nico was behind her. He gathered her hair, held it as she vomited and when she was finished he pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped her mouth. "We'll find her Dani. I'm so sorry."

She looked up at him and shook her head. Her hands shook as she took the cloth from his hands. "This isn't your fault." She wiped her eyes and tried to steady her hands. She was glad when his much larger hands clasped hers. She felt his strength, almost as if it seeped into her in some way. "This is because my kid made a stupid mistake and got mixed up with people who are way more dangerous than he realized." She swallowed when the bile rose in her throat again. "God…" She leaned against his chest. "We need to find her Nico…please you need to find her for me."

He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her tight against his chest; against the ache that was building there. He was afraid and fear was something he didn't like to admit to and something he hadn't been on familiar terms with in a long time. "I'm going to get her back Dani. I told you." He wished he believed it as much as he wanted Dani to believe him.

His cell phone rang and he hurried to pull it from his pocket. It was Tommy.

"Tommy, what is it?" He stood and held a hand up when Dani started asking him something. He pulled open the door to the office. "Hang on Tommy." He searched the outer office and waved to Ben. "Carson, you need to hear this." When Ben moved toward him he put the phone on the desk and put him on speaker. "Tommy, speaker's on, Dani's here and Detective Carson, now tell us what you found."

Tommy cleared his throat and took a breath. "I'm here at the Santino residence. I arrived at about quarter to seven with another employee of the Hawks and we secured the outside of the house and waited for Raymond Jr. to arrive. The house didn't appear to be disturbed and the security system was intact. When Ray Jay got here, he entered the code and I entered first, Ronnie followed. The house was cleared room by room and then the security system was reset. I checked the video feeds, there was nothing suspicious. Ronnie had the idea to check Miss Santino's Facebook account. She has a password manager. We were in quickly."

Nico watched Ben, he'd motioned for the uniforms to join them and he knew he whispered into one of their ears. He knew police were now on the way to the house. He gave Ben a look and Ben nodded at him. Tommy already knew it was coming, in fact he'd said he was surprised they weren't there yet, actually so was Nico.

Tommy was still talking. "There wasn't anything important on her wall, but she'd recently had a chat, as in within the last few hours. Someone had told her to meet them on the street, not the lot because I got a new car with a lot of exclamation points. It was from an account listed as, Elizabeth Wingate."

Dani gasped. "Libby said she didn't talk to Lindsay. She wouldn't have lied…she wouldn't have done this…"

Tommy interrupted. "Dr. Dani, hang on…Ronnie checked it's a counterfeit account. Someone set it up last night, it's really just a name and birthday, but someone knew your daughter's plans and used it. Logged in and sent her a message at exactly the right time to get her where they wanted her. Someone grabbed her didn't they?"

Nico confirmed it. "From the curb, silver Navigator, brand new at least two people. One was driving and one was in the backseat. She knew them, but she didn't look scared." He looked to Dani. He'd been wondering if it was the Harper boys in the car ever since he saw the video, or at least driving because he figured if Lindsay had seen one of them, she wouldn't have stood and chatted so casually for the few seconds she did. "I think she knew the driver, but I don't think it was Tyler."

Ben shook his head. "Careles we don't know anything right now. We don't know if the Harpers are involved at all. All we know is that Lindsay Santino was taken, apparently against her will…"

Nico spun into the man's personal space. "Everything you know, you know because I called you…because I had a feeling this was more than you and the police thought it was." He pressed forward. "You've been pretending what, that you knew all along? Don't fuck with me. You didn't get a call from an eye witness. Her brother called me and I called you, you would have blown anyone else off with the typical seventeen year old girl bullshit…" He ground his teeth together. "So shut up and pay attention to me. It's the Harper boys, start there. At least do your job and shake a few trees around them. Let them know you're watching them. Where are they? Do you even know?"

Ben swallowed. They were supposed to be with their mother, the youngest was remanded into her custody. The oldest was twenty one, but he had listed his parent's address as his address as well. Both of them should be local. "They both have court appearances in two days, they shouldn't be too far."

Tommy made a snorting sound from the phone.

Nico wanted to punch Ben, in fact his hand fisted. "And two boys who systematically drugged and raped girls are going to be relied on to show up for that court appearance?"

Dani sat down. She picked up the phone and took it off speaker. "Tommy is Ray Jay there…can you put him on please?" Her voice cracked and she started crying, but she didn't care and she stopped listening to the discussion in the room.

"Mom"

"Ray Jay, baby…they took Lindsay." Her hand shook and she tightened her grip on the phone.

"Mom, fuck I'll kill them…this is my fault."

Dani heard the fear in his voice. She also heard someone say something behind him, she could tell it was Ronnie, but she couldn't make out the words. "It's not your fault. You didn't know what Tyler was like. You made a stupid mistake, yes, but this wasn't because of that. Tyler isn't thinking right."

"But if I wouldn't have done any of that…shit…I'm so sorry…" He was crying now and then he stopped and took a breath. "Do you know where she is?"

"No, but Nico and the police are working on it." She wiped her eyes.

"Mom," His voice was quiet, and hesitant. "Would Juliette have any idea where they might take her…I mean since you know…?"

She gasped and looked to Nico.

He saw her face and heard her gasp.

She held the phone to him and he took it, puzzled.

"Yea? Ray Jay, why is your mother…" He listened as Ray Jay asked him the same question. His stomach sank, but it also made him feel hopeful. It was a lead, something they could use, a direction and he wondered why he hadn't thought about it. "Put Ronnie or Tommy on and excellent job…I owe you one kid."

When Ronnie was on the line he ran through a list of instructions. "Get a hold of AJ. I want a breakdown of the videos by location, hotel rooms, motel rooms, private residences and warehouses. If he can ID any of them by city or even be more specific I need it yesterday. You know it's life or death. You get that Ronnie."

"Shit, more than most boss. I want in when you pick her up. You get that right?"

"Done. Tell the kid he did good for me."

"He's smart for a cute one." She laughed and then got serious. "Find her before something happens boss…please."

"I'm working on it." He hung up and immediately turned to Dani. "Call Corinne. I need to talk to Juliette, right fucking now."

_Somewhere else…_

Her head hurt like hell, her mouth felt like someone had stuffed it with cotton while she'd slept and she had to pee. That was her first thought. She felt like she had when she drank two glasses of wine when she'd turned twelve. Then she lifted her head and it felt like an ice pick had been rammed through the back of her head and a miniature rollercoaster was running non-stop in her stomach.

She moaned, rolled to her side and vomited over the edge of the dirty mattress she just realized she was on. Then she started to panic and another wave of nausea hit her, she vomited again and struggled to remember anything, but nothing made any sense. She lay on her side and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand as she looked around.

The room was dark, there were high windows like a basement possibly. The mattress was nasty and uncovered. She could see some stains and she knew she just added to them, but with her head pounding and her stomach still in flux, she was afraid to sit up. The mattress was on a frame in a corner and the room was big enough so that she couldn't see the opposite side in the dark.

Experimentally, she pushed herself upright, but kept herself leaning against the wall. The room spun some, but she didn't vomit and she kept the panic to a low hum, until she realized her shoes, jeans, bra and t-shirt were missing. She was in her cami and panties and suddenly panic rose up again. Tears blurred her limited vision and panic hammered her pulse into a house beat and she started to hyperventilate.

She heard something. She held her breath and willed the rushing in her ears to dull down as she pulled her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. The room was cool and her change in position exposed more skin to the air. She shivered.

"Hello?" Her voice was quiet and it wavered. She bit her lip and closed her eyes as tears ran down her face. She wanted her mother. She wanted to be home, but she wanted to know what happened. She hated not knowing and it was terrifying her.

Right now, the last thing she knew for sure was she was leaving school…then an SUV, Libby got a new car. She rested her head on her knees and tried to remember. No, it wasn't Libby, but it was supposed to be. It had been her ex. A guy named Ken and he was an asshole. He hadn't been nice to Libby when they had dated and she'd broken up with him five months ago. When she got to the car, Lindsay had thought it was a joke, a bad one, that he still knew Libby's Facebook password and was just fucking with her, so she'd said goodbye and started back to the parking lot and then…it got fuzzy.

Something happened. Tyler Harper? Had Tyler been there? She thought harder.

Another wave of nausea hit her and she moaned. Tyler Harper and now she was almost naked on a mattress in a basement somewhere…shit. Had she been drugged and raped? Wasn't that what Tyler and his brother did to girls...to Juliette?

She touched herself between the legs, she didn't feel sore, but that didn't guarantee anything, but then from what Juliette had said, Tyler and the rest of his buddies were rough. So, she figured at least for now, she was still a virgin. Did Tyler know that? If he did she doubted it would be good for her. She moved to the bottom of the bed, avoiding the area she'd vomited in and then carefully stood up.

At first she was overwhelmingly dizzy, it took her several long minutes for the sensation to pass and for her feel steady enough to take a step. Even then, she held onto the mattress for the security of it. It felt like her only safe haven, which she admitted made no sense.

She squinted into the darkness and tried to see more than five or six feet away, but it was too dark and the little bit of light that was coming in from the windows just didn't penetrate that far into the room. She dragged her foot along the floor and held out her hands and moved forward slowly. There was nothing on the floor or in her path and seemingly, there was nothing in the room, but the bed in the corner. She did find a door, but it was locked. She still had to pee and the pressure was getting worse. She walked around the room again and found nothing. Not even a bucket.

She debated and then banged on the door. She screamed and banged again when five minutes later nothing happened and no one answered. She didn't know how long she'd been there. It was dark outside. It could be the middle of the night or eight o clock, she had no idea. She started crying again and was debating what to do when she heard the door open.

She blinked and held up a hand when the lights went on. She was essentially blind in the sudden brightness.

"You're up. I'm glad you let us know by the way." Someone laughed and walked into the room.

Lindsay blinked at the floor. She could see three sets of feet as she let her eyes adjust to the light.

"You're right Ty, she's cute…nice ass." A new voice said behind her.

"I told you." Tyler was beside her and he took her arm. "You shouldn't have turned me down though Lindsay." He touched his jaw. "You're brother, lucky shot and all that."

She glared at him, pulled her arm from his hand and turned to the guy behind her. "What do you want?"

Mason, he was still by the door, laughed. "Really? She might be cute Tyler, but she's not very smart is she?"

The one behind her, the stranger, stepped close to her and touched her shoulder. "Come on little girl, even you aren't that dumb. You're in a room, your clothes are gone…" he nodded over his shoulder to the bed, "there are accommodations and no one knows where you are. What exactly do you think we want?"

She wanted to throw up again. Her skin crawled and she stepped away from him even though it meant she moved closer to Tyler. He was older, probably close to her Mom's age…Matt's age and it was really grossing her out. She looked from Tyler to Mason and shook her head. "Please don't do this…" Tears were on her face. "I can get you money if you want it…anything…I can get you out of the country if you need it. You just need to tell me."

The creepy guy's hand slid down her shoulder to shove her cami straps down and expose her breasts. She pressed closer to Tyler. "Please…please Tyler…I swear I can get anything…"

"Shut up bitch." Her head jerked backward as the older man yanked her hair and she fell to her knees. He undid his zipper. "Let me give you something to do with that mouth other than run it…"

"Lewis, hang on." Mason stopped him. He looked down at Lindsay. "How? How can you get us out of the country?"

Lewis still had her hair and he was rubbing his cock against her cheek. "Really, you're gonna listen to this bitch lie?" He slapped her mouth with his cock and laughed when she gagged. "It's not even in your throat yet slut." He looked at the Tyler and started forcing her head toward him again. "I paid good money for her. If I don't get this, you're paying me back twice what I paid you."

Tyler shot his brother a look. "We need the money Mason. He's right, she's probably lying."

Lindsay turned her head to the side, desperate tears on her face. "He tell you I'm a virgin?" She pulled her shirt back up to cover her breasts.

Tyler shoved Lewis away and looked at Lindsay. "If it's the truth, she's worth twice what I charged you."

"Now the bitch is just telling you that now to save her hide." He tucked himself into his pants. "If I pay you twice, you gonna let me have her and if I pay that much you better let me do any of the nasty things with her we talked about for free." He winked at Tyler. "I mark her up no extra."

Lindsay shivered and felt sick all over again and then she swallowed and glared at him before she wiped a hand across her mouth. She spit on the floor. She looked at Mason. "Nico Careles, security for the Hawks. Super scary guy. I know him. He can get you what you need. Check it out if you don't believe me, but he'll only cooperate if you don't hurt me."

Tyler looked at his brother. "How about it? You check up on this Careles guy and I give Lewis a chance to come up with more cash. Whoever has the answer first gets the girl?"

Mason shrugged. "Fine by me, if he pays five grand, that bumps our bank to ten grand and that should be enough to get us out of the country anyway." He looked at Lewis. "Better get moving though, if she's right it won't take me long to find answers on Careles just a couple phone calls. You got another twenty five hundred laying around?"

Lewis grumbled. "It'll take me about fifteen to get home and pull it together and another few to get back." He moved toward the door. "Just drag your feet a few minutes for me then." He blew a kiss in Lindsay's direction and was gone.

Lindsay looked at Mason. He was the one she needed to help her. "Call Careles. I have his number."

He laughed. "I need outside proof sweetheart. Proof he has pull to do what you say he can do." He pulled his phone out and dialed a number. "Then I call your guy." He gave her a funny look. "If you even know him."

"Sid, tell me quick what you know about a Nico Careles, supposedly big time intimidator." Mason listened with an occasional head nod and uh-huh.

He turned his back at one point and Lindsay couldn't see his face. She still had to pee. She was really getting desperate now. Her feet here extremely cold and it wasn't helping. She moved from foot to foot and pressed her legs together. She looked to Tyler, he was busy ignoring her and his brother.

"Tyler?"

"Huh?" He glanced up at her and then back at his phone.

"Any chance I can use the bathroom?" She smiled at bit nervously. "I really have to pee."

He looked at his brother and then shrugged. "Come on." He grabbed her arm and dragged her to the door and then through it.

What she thought was a basement wasn't. She was in a warehouse and once out of the room they entered a long narrow hallway. There were signs on the wall about avoiding workplace injuries, but it was obvious the place hadn't been active for some time. The room they left was at the end of the hall and there was no other door way until about halfway up the hall and then there were two rooms, one on each side of the hall; ladies to the left, men to the right.

Tyler pushed open the door. He held it open and waited. "Go ahead and this is as much privacy as you get." He laughed.

There was no other door between the toilet and where he was standing, but considering the fact that Lindsay had been about to piss down her leg she was thankful for a place to squat. She didn't even hesitate and honestly, she'd learned to do her business with a brother around. So, yanking her panties down and sitting quickly was an easy task. The seat being dirty wasn't even about to ick her out at this point.

She hummed to herself and closed her eyes and didn't bother to look for toilet paper she knew didn't exist. She did try the sink and sighed when there was no water. She stepped past Tyler.

He grabbed her around the waist. "Fuck if that didn't just turn me on." He pressed against her hip. He was hard. He turned her so that her belly was pressed against the wall in the hallway. "You know I could fuck your tight ass and he'd never know." His hand ran down her back and slid into her panties. He squeezed her ass. "He's not interested in that…" He pressed against her and yanked her hair back when she whimpered. "Make sure you're not a virgin in any way after tonight Lindsay Santino." He probed at her with his finger.

She gagged and her mind stopped. She heard him, but she didn't register what he was saying. She could see, feel, and smell but it was almost like she was somewhere else. Then something he did hurt a lot and suddenly she was there again and she felt his breath on her neck and she felt his rough fingers and she had one thought screaming through her head: get away now. She took a breath, and then slammed her head backward just as he leaned forward.

Tyler screamed as red-hot pain sank into his face and blood bubbled from his nose. "Fuckim butch…Mufer fuckim butch…" He pulled away from her and cradled his damaged face.

Lindsay ran. She needed them to call Nico, and she was sure if they did Nico would find her, but she'd just hurt Tyler and she wasn't sure if that would be bad for her, but she figured it would be…she was pretty sure Mason would protect Tyler just like Ray Jay would protect her. She also knew Lewis would be back soon. So she ran up the hall and away from the room she'd been in.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Corinne wasn't happy to have Juliette's first day of inpatient therapy interrupted, but the explanation and the police who showed up to pick her up did a lot to smooth things over.

Juliette on the other hand, was not happy about the interruption, but not because she didn't want to help. She was upset because Lindsay was in trouble and because Mason and Tyler were out. She was more than willing to help.

The police took her to Dani's house. Ray Jay was there with Ronnie and Tommy already and it wasn't long before Nico and Dani were there as well.

She rushed into Dani's arms and they held each other. Neither of them said much, and there wasn't much they could say. Juliette gave Nico all the information she could about the times she had been with Mason. She'd been high most of the time, so it was difficult to remember.

Dani suggested she hypnotize her and she agreed.

Nico stood behind the couch by the door where Juliette couldn't see him. She didn't want to see him and he understood, so he stood out of the way and listened.

Juliette lay on the couch with her eyes closed.

"Okay Juliette, now that you're relaxed and safe, take a deep breath. Visualize yourself in the place Mason took you." She waited. "Slowly breathe and see it, let it surround you, hear the sounds, inhale the scents and tell me what it is you see and hear. What does it smell like? How does it make you feel?"

Dani watched Juliette. She held out her hand and traced the back of the couch like she was touching something. "It's old and run down. No one has been here for a long time. No water, but there is electric." She took a breath and wrinkled her nose. "Oily and metal, and I hear trains and water dripping…it makes me feel bad here…it's bad here. Part of a sign on the floor…I can't read all of it but it's the end of one word –ing then a new word parts are rusted and –chining." She took a shuddering breath and gasped and her head shook, her hands fisted. "Everything else is pain Dani, it's all what he does and I don't want to go there."

"It's okay Juliette, it's okay…I want you to listen to me and when I count to three wake up and you'll feel safe and refreshed. One…you're fine. Two, you're feeling more awake and better, you're safe and three."

Her eyes opened and she blinked. She took a breath and wiped her eyes and then sat up. She looked at Dani. "It's a big place I know that, but that's all I have to add." She looked to Nico. "Did that help?"

He moved and sat down beside her and hugged her. He kissed her cheek. "I'm sorry he hurt you Juliette. So fucking sorry I couldn't help you then and I wish I could make what he did go away."

She looked at him a bit puzzled and shook her head at the tears in his eyes. "Nico. She put a hand to his cheek. What happened to me is my fault, not yours, but if you want to help you can catch him now. Keep him from hurting Lindsay." She closed her eyes. "If he hurts her, I'll hate myself for not doing something about him sooner. I knew he had young girls involved Nico. Fuck. I should have said something way back then."

Dani was only half paying attention to them. She'd been trying to figure out what the words on the sign might mean along with the clues. AJ had put together a list of places based on what they knew. So, they had a few known motels and hotels, most on Long Island. There was also the house in the Hamptons. Then there were the unknowns, but with specifics. One was a warehouse location, this was listed and it was the place Juliette just described.

The police had ruled out the known motels, hotels and residences. That left the unknowns. Nico had his money on the warehouse. It was used in most of the videos of the underage girls. He thought they used it for the riskiest of their behavior because they thought it was the securest location. If that was true, then they'd use it for the kidnapping. They just needed to figure out where it was.

"Something Machining." Dani popped up from the chair. "Something Machining…shit it fits…" She grabbed his arm and shook it as she pointed at the pad of paper she'd written the list of things Juliette had told her on and then at the list they'd printed out from AJ about what he'd seen in the videos.

Nico looked at her like she was crazy. "Dani, I'm not following so back up a second."

She pointed to the letters. "The sign Juliette saw: -ing and then –chining. It's the last part of something and then Machining. It's an old machine shop, dirty, oily, metal…the smells. Close to trains, either commuter or industrial, both make sense." She was smiling. "It's something to go on."

Nico nodded, pulled her into his arms and kissed her quick. Then he pulled out his phone. He dialed AJ, who was actually somewhere on vacation. Hell, he felt a bit bad since he'd sent him there, but AJ was the computer genius and he needed him.

AJ picked up on half a ring. "Boss."

"An old machine shop, probably a name ending in –ing and then Machining, near a railway, could be commuter or industrial. I think that's the warehouse. I need an address."

It was quiet for a minute and a half. Nico didn't bother AJ and just let him work.

"Kerning Machining closed fifteen years ago. It fits all the other parameters as well. I'm texting the address to you and the police. You first by five minutes and you're five minutes closer." AJ sent the text to Nico's phone. "Get the bastards boss. Nail them this time. I don't want these assholes out anywhere. I have girls…this could be my daughter. Shit…"

"I will AJ, they're going in for kidnapping on their own this time. No conspiracy bullshit and if they touched her. They won't be alive."

"Boss, you probably shouldn't have admitted that." AJ chuckled nervously.

"It won't matter…" his phone buzzed. "Got the info, thanks. If I need more I'll contact you stay available."

"Will do, keep me updated then." AJ disconnected.

Nico nodded to Juliette and Dani. "AJ was able to get me an address. I'm taking Ronnie and Tommy and we're meeting the police. You two stay here with Ray Jay."

Dani shook her head and stood up. "I'm going with you…"

He grabbed her arms. "Dani…" his voice was calm and stern. "No." He had no idea what they were going to find, but he didn't want Dani to see it first. He would have one of the uniforms bring her over a few minutes later, but only after he and Ronnie had things controlled. "Once I know it's safe for you to be there fine, but not yet." If Lindsay was hurt…god, if she'd been raped…no, Dani was not going to see her like that. "Let us secure the place first, let the police take the Harpers away and I promise you I'll let you see her right after. I'll have that officer in the driveway bring you over."

She nodded against his chest. "Okay, but I don't like it…I want to be there. I want to be with you and see my baby first."

He kissed her forehead and then he was headed to the office door. He glanced back to see Dani pull Juliette into her arms. "I'll bring her home Dani."

Dani sniffed and turned her head into Juliette's shoulder. "I know you will, but will she still be in one piece?"


	19. Dismantle Me

_**Note:** _Firstly, warning fairly upfront like...rapish tortury stuff here you will find. If you no like turn tail and run: I did mark the worst of it with a bold **Warning** and the end with a bold **Also**, so if you have issues you can avoid that section...

Usual stuff applies, I did actually finish on time for the most part because I had to. I sometimes get a bit obsessive about getting things done, even when I want to read my book. So, Harry had to wait at times...he can be patient even when he didn't want to be, but then he was mostly dead for a year so he'll be okay. I even had a crappy office party last night and STILL got this done, even after too much Pinot Noir. I want you to know that was a special feat for me. Those things kill me, the wine may have helped...it's possible.

Now, I have the BIG company party coming up...that's the really BAD one. All the CEOs and CFOs and UFOs and WHO-THE-HELL-KNOWS, you know just get on your knees and kiss my ass types. This year it's a "Winter Wonderland Ball" theme, can we say gag me...are we in high school? I only want to go if Harry is my Winter Knight and Mab's gonna be there. Then it might be interesting, I wonder if Spanglecrotch is appropriate dress code? -Sound interesting people? Read the books...I swear you're missing out.

Okay, nothing good happens in this chapter...It's a big mess of horrible news and sorta answers and kinda odd stuff...I promise there will be answers, just eventually. Reviews appreciated, because I enjoy knowing what you think about the characters, not just that you like the story, hey that's good to hear to btw, so feel free to tell me that, but I really do like to hear your thoughts, good or bad :D

So, bring it on. Oh and tissues...maybe a good idea.

* * *

**Dismantle Me**

Lindsay was breathing heavy by the time she pushed through the swinging doors into what was obviously the main room. It was colder out here as she shivered, and she wasn't sure if it was her fear or the cold, because she was sweating and it was cooling on her skin now. She looked over her shoulder and bit back a cry. She's turned a corner at some point in the hall and she couldn't see Tyler, but she heard him. He sounded pissed.

The room was dark. The only light came from a few of the emergency lights and they were few and far between. The room was large and cluttered and when she took a step she stepped on something sharp. It sank into her foot, cutting it deeply. She gasped as fresh tears poured down her face. She wiped at them and then reached down to pull the object from her left foot. It was a long piece of metal, about the length of her palm and thin enough to be blade like. She decided no keep it even though it cut into her hand as she held onto it. She looked around, heard Tyler coming and chose the center of the room; the darkest part. She wanted to hide there. If she couldn't see, then Tyler wouldn't be able to either. There was more cover there as far as she could tell.

She was still crying. Her foot hurt and she knew she was trailing blood on the floor because it was dripping, she felt it. The cut was deep and she was worried, but she didn't have much choice. She held out her hand, the one with the sharp object in it and slid the bloodied foot forward. She ducked when the door swung open.

"Bwutch…" Tyler's voice was distorted from the damage Lindsay's head had done to his nose and mouth. "I'm gwonna kwill you. Fwuck you fwirst, twen kwill you."

Lindsay would have laughed at how he sounded if things weren't so fucked. She watched him, since she could see him outlined in the doorway and then he held up his phone. At first she thought he was going to use it as a flashlight, but he didn't. He called someone. "Mwaswon…shwe's lwoose…mwain woom." He hung up and started moving around the area.

Lindsay crouched and kept her hand against whatever it was she was touching. It was on her left, so she kept it there as she moved forward and in the opposite direction of Tyler. She tried to stay quiet. Luckily, Tyler was noisy, so he masked enough noise for her.

She got about two feet when Mason slid into the room. She figured she'd be able to keep moving, but she hadn't counted on him being smarter than his brother.

He instantly flipped the flash on his phone on and used it as a flashlight.

"What the hell Tyler?" He shined the light on his brother. "You look like you were slammed into a brick wall."

He flipped his brother off. "Mwore lwike twhe bwak of a bwutches head." He followed his older brother's example and turned his phone's light source on and used it as a flashlight.

Mason grunted. "What the hell…you can be such an idiot." He moved to the left and pointed to the right. "Go that way. She probably stuck to the sides, more light and the doors are along the wall if she's looking for a way out."

Lindsay exhaled and stayed where she was. If they stuck to the sides, she had some more time and they'd miss the blood. She hoped anyway. Her heart was pounding because Mason was close to where she cut herself.

"Hey, she was right about that guy of hers." Mason stopped and shined his light toward his brother. "He can do what he says, or at least get us to people who can."

The beam of light didn't penetrate all the way to Lindsay, but she sank closer to the floor when the light passed in her direction, just in case.

"Dwon't cware nwow. Fwuckin bwutch…gwonna fwuck hwer up." Tyler growled and kicked something on the floor.

"You should care you fuck up." He looked in his brother's direction. "Why'd she run? What did you do to her anyway?"

"Nwothwin." He stopped and glared at Mason. "Why you twhink I dwid swomthwimg?"

Mason quickly covered the space between them and he grabbed a fistful of his brother's shirt. "Because you make stupid decisions asshat and you do stupid things." He shoved him. "You probably tried something and scared her, which is why you have a bloody face and a fucked up nose. She was too damn scared to do anything and she knew we wouldn't hurt her while we were waiting on info, at least not until Lewis got back. So, you must have done something." He stopped and then grabbed his brother again. "This is your fault anyway. If you wouldn't have labeled all those damn videos with ages…I told you to use a code, keep it off the record…and then…" He shoved and Tyler sprawled on the floor.

Lindsay took advantage of their arguing and moved as quietly as could across the room. It was very slow going because the room was cluttered and her foot was killing her. She actually realized it was getting a bit numb and weak now and that worried her, but she knew she needed to move and she needed to move now. It was pitch black as she got to the center of the room. She gasped when the boys started actually throwing punches and she looked over her shoulder, but she kept moving.

She almost sobbed when she found the opposite wall and she took a second to catch her breath and decide which direction to go. To her right it looked as if there was a door, so she went that way. She was right and she pushed open the door carefully and entered another hallway. She leaned against the wall beside the door in the dark hall with tears on her face and looked down the hall to her left. There was some light in this hall and she could clearly see odd lights at the end of the long hall. She was pretty sure they were street lights and headlights passing by even though she could not directly see the exit.

She pressed her hand to her mouth, took a breath and pushed away from the wall some, but kept her left hand against it. She still held the metal piece in her right hand and she hobbled slowly to what she thought was bound to be the exit as her heart pounded erratically in her throat. She wasn't feeling well. She was getting pretty dizzy and she wondered if the drugs were still in her system or if she lost too much blood. She had no idea how deep the cut really was. A flash of panic hit her and almost paralyzed her, but she forced it back. She wiped her eyes, swallowed and took another couple of unsteady steps and then she saw something.

At first she thought it was her imagination and then she shook her head and sank to the floor.

**Warning: **

"Ah baby you didn't have to meet me by the door…I woulda come to you." Lewis came around the corner and up the hall at her with a slimy smile on his face illuminated by a small lantern in his hand. "Those boys lost you didn't they?" He tsked at her. "No matter. I'll pay 'em and take what's mine." He sidled up to her and looked up the hall, back the way he'd come. "Here's just as good as where we were…well, the bed was nicer, but the desk'll work girly."

He grabbed Lindsay's arm and pulled her to her feet.

Lindsay, suddenly remembering the metal in her hand, brought it up and slashed at Lewis's arm. "Get the hell away from me."

The metal sank into his forearm and left a four inch gash from about his elbow down.

He shoved her back to the floor, but grabbed her wrist and twisted. The shiv fell to the floor and he kicked it down the hall just before he backhanded her across the cheek. "Bitch." He grabbed his arm and checked the damage, holding up the lantern with his uninjured arm. "Fuck, that hurt. Good thing my tetanus shot's up to date." He poked the wound and then bent down and pulled Lindsay to her feet. He dragged her in the direction he'd come.

Halfway between the sharp left turn in the hall and where he'd found her there was a large reception desk. To one side of the desk there was a half wall and the desk sat in the middle of the hallway. There was only one way through. The desk was a sort of, stop here and get in only after you see the gate keeper kind of reception area.

Lewis pressed Lindsay's back against the desk and set his lantern down. He leered at her and then pulled an eight inch Bowie knife from sheath on his belt. "I like a girl with some fight in her." He menacingly held the knife up and then pressed the flat of the knife against her cheek. "Don't move or you'll end up with a scar where you don't want one gorgeous." He leaned closer and licked her other cheek and then gripped her chin. He pulled back and watched her face.

She was crying, her eyes were pressed shut and there was snot running down her face. He turned the knife so that the spine was against her skin and he pulled it down her cheek. He watched her shiver as he dragged it down her neck and slid the blade under one of the straps of her cami. He lifted and the sharp blade sliced the strap. He dipped it lower and the spine traced over the swell of her breasts and then up to slice the other strap. "Mm, your skin is so flawless little girl…just the way I like it." He gripped the top of her cami and slid the edge of the blade down the seam and the material split easily leaving her bare to his gaze.

"Fuck, you are a firm little thing." He took a second to tie the material from her cami around the wound of his arm and then he smiled. "Open your eyes." He tapped her forehead with his knife. "Hey." When she did he nodded. "Good." He waved the knife in front of her face. "Now watch, I don't like it when my girls disappear on me…I like 'em to feel everything I do. So don't get lost in that pretty head of yours now." He grabbed the back of her head and forced his tongue into her mouth. He bruised her lips and raped her mouth while she fought him. He pulled back. "That's the spirit."

He smiled and then dropped the knife to the tops of her breasts again and teased it along the swells and then between. He pressed the tip of the knife into her right nipple and then the left until she cried out and he laughed at her. "Oh, you're making me a bit impatient. I've had enough of this…" He slid the knife into her panties along her right hip and yanked hard upward and then repeated the same to the left. He pulled the strip of fabric away and dropped it to the floor. "Hell yea, there we go."

He backed up and looked at her and rubbed the hand with the knife over his fly slowly. "Fuck yea, you are a sexy thing aren't?" He shoved her legs apart with the flat of the knife and slid it up the inside of her thigh as he watched her face. Then he stopped and raised the knife and tapped it against his lip like he was thinking.

Lindsay watched him. She was scared to death and she wanted to throw up. She kept hoping he would put the knife back into his belt, but he didn't. Instead, he smiled, waved it at her, turned around and sank it into the drywall across the hall from her. She shivered when he turned back to her and licked his lips and she scrambled back away from the edge of the desk in an attempt to get away from him as he stepped closer. She shook her head. "Please…please don't…" She held her hands out when he was right in front of her.

Lewis smiled at her. "I like it when you beg, so you go right ahead." He grabbed her legs, one in each hand, and pulled her back to the edge of the desk so he stood between them. He leaned over her and ran his hands up her sides to her small breasts. He squeezed then hard, until she squirmed and cried out. "Mm, so nice." Then hand slid lower and down over her belly.

Lindsay turned her head to the side and tried to press her legs together, but Lewis was standing between them, so that was impossible. Instead, she focused on the light patterns at the end of the hall and the way the lights wavered on the wall. She sniffed and when she felt his fingers probe between her legs she flinched and closed her eyes. She heard him say something to her and then he grabbed her chin and turned her face to his. He slapped her and repeated his instructions; it was something about her paying attention to him…

**_Also…_**

Nico ran every red light and stop sign. He illegally passed several people and broke more traffic laws in fifteen minutes than he probably had in years. He was pretty sure he was on a sidewalk or two at a few points. It didn't matter because he made good time and as he pulled into the old industrial park, he cut the lights on the Lincoln. There were three vehicles in front of the old building and he was sure they were at the right place. He parked quietly and exited the car quickly.

Tommy and Ronnie were out of the car and around to his side just as quickly as he was. He looked at them and then the building as he opened his trunk. He pulled out two flashlights.

"Weapons?"

Tommy pulled a Sig 9mm from his shoulder holster.

Ronnie pulled a small Baby Eagle from her own shoulder holster. "I have a compact six shot Taurus in a leg holster, in my boot if you want it, or I'll use it and let you use the Eagle." She shrugged.

Nico eyed her. He knew what it meant to give up your preferred weapon and he appreciated the offer. He shook his head. He didn't want a gun. He didn't trust himself. He pointed to the knife at her hip. "Just give me your knife."

She unhooked the sheath from her belt and handed it to him. "All yours then boss. I like that, so take care of it."

Nico slid the knife from the leather and balanced it on his palm before he spun the blade in his hand several times. He twirled the knife through his fingers as he talked. "Lindsay is the priority. Secure her; then we deal with the boys." He slid the knife back into the sheath and slid it into his waistband. He'd have it if he needed it. He motioned to the third car. "We have an extra player, so be careful."

Tommy and Ronnie nodded.

"We get her out, assess the situation and if we need to take action at that point we do." He gave the other two pointed looks. He waited until they each nodded at him.

Tommy raised his gun, took off the safety and nodded. "I'll take point then boss."

"Quiet on the inside."

Ronnie nodded, removed her safety and followed the other two men into the building.

Tommy entered the building and motioned Nico and Ronnie in when the initial area was clear. It appeared they were in a foyer type area. There was a window that went to the main office, but there was no door accessing this area and there was a hall directly in front of them. He moved into the hall, which turned sharply to the right. He turned to the right and motioned the others. Halfway down the hall there was a half wall obscuring his view, but there was sound.

Nico heard something and saw Tommy's face. He moved around the corner and brought up his flashlight. Lindsay lay on her back, her head toward him, naked on a desk. A man, about his own age stood between Lindsay's legs with his pants around his ankles. Lindsay's eyes were open, tears streaming down her face, but she didn't seem to register anything. There was blood on her face and leg and her chest and she was quite pale.

Rage welled up in Nico. White hot and so violent he saw only that.

The man held up his hand. "Fuck Tyler…Mason…about fucking time you joined the party…she's a fine piece of ass and we're just starting to enjoy ourselves aren't we?" He slapped Lindsay's cheek so hard her entire body jolted and she groaned. "Oh, there you are…glad you're still with me. I keep telling you I need you with me." He grabbed her hair, pulled her head to the side and shifted his hips. She yelped. "You're the one making me hurt you, girly…you must like it that way. That what it is?" He laughed and glanced back down the hall. "For fuck sake, turn off the damn light or bring it here and put it to better use will you?"

Nico moved. "Mother fucker…mother fucker…I will fucking kill you."

"What the fuck…who the fu…."

Nico hit him at full speed and knocked him to the ground. He grabbed Lewis's head and slammed it into the cement floor once, twice and then again. "You fucking piece of shit!" He punched him over and over in the face and temple. Nico stood and dragged the barely conscious man up with him. He glared at him, hatred in his eyes as he pressed his forearm into the man's throat, effectively pinning him against the wall as he stared him down. Nico's eyes were wild and there were tears on his cheeks as spit clung to his lips and flew when he spoke.

His voice was a low threat, hoarse with emotion, but deadly calm and Nico barely recognized it as his own. "I am going to peel the skin from your body, inch by inch and you're going to feel every second of it." He released the pressure on Lewis's throat. Let him gasp for breath and then cut off his air again. He smiled when the other man's eyes bugged out. "Then I'm going to pull out your fingernails, your toenails, maybe even one eye because you only need one to watch me cut off your balls." He leaned against his throat again and pressed harder.

Lewis started to struggle more, even if it was extremely weakly, and then he started to go limp.

"Boss, come on let him go." Tommy said. "We have the girl. Priority, remember."

Nico didn't budge. He smiled a bit insanely and pressed even harder.

"Boss, let him go."

Lewis was barely conscious now. His face was red, his lips were blue.

Nico ignored him again.

Tommy touched Nico's arm and tugged. "Boss, let him go."

Nico dropped the man to the floor, turned and threw a punch at Tommy.

Tommy was ready. He ducked, took a step back and stayed low. "Boss…it's cool…we have Lindsay." He pointed to the desk where Ronnie had just finished pulling her t-shirt over the girl's head and was sliding her jacket on her now. "Priority, Lindsay. Assess the situation then we act. So, come on pull it together boss."

Nico wiped a hand over his face and realized he was crying and that his hand was shaking. Tommy was right. Fuck, what was he doing? He held a hand out to Tommy and when Tommy stepped closer he put it on Tommy's shoulder. "Thank you."

"You would have done the same for me." He looked back at the desk. Ronnie was still in her tank top and flannel and had the girl in her arms, she was crying with her, rocking her and it broke his heart too. He looked away and glared at the poor excuse for a human on the floor. "Fuck. Who the hell is he by the way?" His hand fisted around the grip of his gun. "I want to kill him myself, so I get it. I'll secure him and call an ambulance. The police should be here, by like what now? They were supposed to be right behind us."

Nico shook his head. "Squad is fine, but they aren't moving her until Dani gets here…fuck." He wiped his face again, turned and brought back his right leg. He kicked the man on the floor in the ribs and grunted in satisfaction when he moaned. "I need to call Dani…I have no idea what to say to her…her baby is broken Tommy…I failed…and where the fuck are Tyler and Mason damn it?"

Nico watched Tommy move to the piece of shit on the floor pull a pair of metal cuffs from his belt. He smiled when he put them on tight and the guy complained. Tommy left his pants down and otherwise left him where he lay. He turned to look at Lindsay and swallowed. He didn't know what to say, what to do. His heart was broken and fuck it, he was afraid to go near her. He glanced at Ronnie.

Ronnie saw the pain on Nico's face and she respected him all the more for it. She was right about her boss. He was the kind of man she could trust. She nodded at him and then whispered to Lindsay.

"Hey baby…" She rubbed the girl's back, "Nico's here, he brought us here to help you."

Lindsay nodded against Ronnie's chest. "Nico was going to save me. I said that, told them he would come for me." She pulled back and looked up at Ronnie. "They called to ask, said he could help, but Lewis came back."

Nico felt like someone kicked him in the balls, the gut, shot his favorite dog and Dani all at the same time. He almost fell to the ground. He'd failed her. Failed. He swallowed, cleared his throat and his mind. "Mason and Tyler, where are they?"

Lindsay jumped. "Nico? You're here? You came?" She looked over at him as if realizing he was there for the first time. "You came for me." She sat up, tears ran down her face. "I said you would, you'd find me…I don't feel good." He pressed a hand to her head. "Drugs, is this just a dream. Did they drug me again? Did I pass out…lose too much blood this time?"

Nico didn't hesitate he moved to her. "Where are you hurt Lindsay?" He stopped in front of her, but didn't touch.

She looked up at him, dazed and shook her head before she reached out to touch his arm. "You feel real, like Ronnie. She sat forward and pressed her face to his chest and then clung to him with a sob. "God…please be real, don't be my imagination and take me home. I want mom."

He stood for a second and then his arms went around her with a ragged sob. "Lindsay, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry this happened to you. I wish I could have kept him from hurting you…from….fuck. I'm just so sorry." He tucked her against him and rocked. He cried with her because there wasn't anything else to do.

Ronnie watched with her hand pressed against her mouth and then she had to turn away. Her own pain and memories weren't fresh, but they still hurt and haunted her. She never had anyone like Nico in her life and she wish she had. She could have used a champion. Someone on her side to be there no matter what, but she didn't get that.

No, rape didn't turn her lesbian, she knew she liked girls from the time she was eight or nine and no one touched her when she was little. She slept with boys to fit in when she got older, she hated it and sure sometimes boys took what they wanted, but in gang life her straight girlfriends got the same treatment. She maybe got it more often. The only time she ever really felt raped, was in the military. Not only did they call her a liar, but she ended up basically being forced out because of it. The only thing she considered a consolation for all that bullshit was Hugo. She couldn't see a bright side for Lindsay. What good came from rape in a shit hole like this? And pregnant at sixteen and in high school was not a good thing no matter how you ended up that way.

"Hey." Tommy motioned down the hall. "The police decided to finally join the party. Get your game face on."

Nico didn't move, he kept Lindsay tucked against his chest, but he wiped his face and looked up as Ben Carson and five uniformed officers came down the hall in vests with guns drawn.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing here Careles?" He holstered his weapon and crossed his arms.

Nico kept himself between Lindsay and the officers. "Finding my asset and we were notified at the same time you were. What the hell took you so long?" He glared. "We only got here a few minutes before you did. We just called for medics, you can check. We haven't finished securing the building, but no one else has passed us. Still four other vehicles in the lot?"

Ben nodded. "Yep, two belong to the boys already ran the plates. Other one is registered to a Jason Lewis." He glanced to the man on the floor. "That's him I suppose?" He glanced to another detective who was moving off down the hall with the uniforms. "Find those mother fuckers. I want them tonight."

Nico grunted. "Don't know. I didn't bother to ask. I haven't seen the Harper boys."

Lindsay lifted her head weakly. "That…that's what they were calling him…Lewis."

Ben glanced at Nico and then Lindsay. He changed his demeanor and lowered his voice. "You okay?"

She squinted at him. "Do I look okay?"

Nico pulled her tighter against him and pressed a kiss to her head, but said nothing.

Ben shook his head and yelled over his shoulder. "Where's the damn squad and get me a blanket."

Tommy suddenly interrupted. "Boss, you need to make a call."

Nico glanced up and nodded. "Yea, I do." He looked at Lindsay. "Sweetheart, I need to call your mom…shit I need to tell her we found you okay…that you're…you're…"

She nodded. "Tell her I'm okay…" She bit her lip, she was crying and she wrapped her arms around herself and rocked a bit. She glanced around desperately and started shaking. "I'm okay…I'm okay…you're here right?" She looked at Nico and then touched him again, she leaned into him, inhaled the scent of his neck. She nodded. "You're real. I smell you and mom together. Likes sugar and spice…" She wiped her face.

She was breaking his heart. He took off his coat and wrapped it around her. It swallowed her up, but it was warm and it smelled like him and he knew it smelled like Dani as well. He watched her burrow into it. She didn't put her arms in the sleeves. She just pulled it around her like a blanket and tucked her nose against the collar.

"I can't get the smell of him out of my head, but when I smell you and mom it goes away…I feel better." She nodded and closed her eyes. "Thank you." She looked around panicked suddenly when Nico stepped away. "Ronnie?"

Ronnie grabbed Nico's arm and squeezed as he went passed. She didn't say anything, that was all, she wasn't sure she could say anything. She cleared her throat. "Hey baby, whatcha need?"

"Not to be alone."

"That I can do." She sat beside the girl and slid an arm around her shoulder. "You talk if you want and not if you don't."

"He didn't do it." She whispered it as she leaned into Ronnie's side, the coat heavy around her shoulders, her knees against her chest. Her foot was numb now, she barely felt it. Ronnie had wrapped something around it, but it was cold and numb.

"Do what?"

"Rape me…I mean he did stuff and all with his fingers. He…he hurt me…and it was bad," she sobbed and paused, "but he didn't finish…he never actually…Nico…" She gagged and leaned over the side of the desk to dry heave, but nothing came up. She was still grateful that Ronnie held her hair. She sat back up and leaned into Ronnie. She shook her head. "So he didn't then…not really, right?" She bit back a sob. "If he didn't why does it feel so bad? Why does it still feel like he did it? Why do I feel so dirty and used?" She stopped and started sobbing again with her face pressed into Ronnie's side.

Nico turned his back and pulled his phone out. He heard some and it was enough. Tommy put a hand on his arm.

"Boss, I already called and they're probably halfway here, but I told the cop you were gonna call to talk to Dani."

Nico nodded. "Thanks for calling." He glanced up at a commotion at the end of the hall. The paramedics were there. "Shit." He pointed at Ronnie. "She doesn't leave until Dani gets here." He looked at Ben and then pointed to pile of what he could barely call a man on the floor. "That thing can wait for care even if he's half dead. I don't care."

Ben sighed. "Careles, there are two buses, they can handle them both and at least you left the slice of shit breathing. Not that I'd blame you for making the world a better place, but much less paperwork." He watched as one of his officers bagged the knife stuck in the wall. "I assume that belongs to him?"

Nico shrugged. "Was here when we got here so yes?" He'd already tapped contacts, so he tapped favorites and Dani's name was at the top. He tapped it and walked away from the group of people.

He glanced up as a uniform ran back down the hall. "We got them, the brothers…" He looked at Nico, "She beat the hell out of the young one." He smiled, "He's gonna need a plastic surgeon to put his nose back together. They didn't put up much of a fight for us though. I would have liked to kick some ass tonight."

Nico felt an odd sense of pride. He would have smiled if the outcome wasn't so horrible. His call connected and he heard it ring in his ear.

_Elsewhere…_

Dani gripped Juliette's hand and leaned against Ray Jay as she sat between the both of them. She had no idea what was going on. She hadn't hear from Nico. All she knew was what the officer told her. That was, they were okay to go to the old metal workshop and they were on the way. So, the three of them were in the back of a squad car.

This was the first for a Dani. She had actually never been in the back of a police car before. She tried to make a joke of it, but Juliette laughed it off with a comment about she'd probably been in one in almost twenty different states and five countries. Dani frowned. Ray Jay, well he'd been only recently introduced to the back of a squad car and he really wasn't in the mood to kid around.

Honestly, neither was Dani and she was a pissed that Nico hadn't called and she was sick in her stomach because she had no idea if Lindsay was okay or not or even if they'd found her. For all she knew, she wasn't there. Her phone rang. She jumped and even though she was holding her phone she fumbled to hit the accept button.

"Nico…it's Nico." She answered. "Nico, please tell me something." Immediately she was crying and wiping at her eyes. She realized her hand was shaking and she couldn't help it and she didn't care.

"Dani." He took a breath and Dani could hear it was shaky. "We have Lindsay, she's here we found her."

"Thank god, thank you Nico, thank you for finding my baby. You have my baby…thank god…" She sobbed over and over into the phone. She looked at Ray Jay and Juliette. "Nico has her. He found her." She felt better, but she could tell something from his voice. "You aren't telling me something."

"It's not something I didn't tell you baby…I don't know everything. I'm sorry, I don't know how and...Dani, I fuck…" He exhaled a heavy into the phone and his words caught in a sob and Dani heard guilt and pain in each word.

"Oh god Nico, no…don't say it…please no…" Her fingers stopped working and the phone fell into her lap.

Ray Jay looked at Juliette. "What's going on?"

Juliette wiped her eyes. "Fuck no." She picked up the phone and wrapped an arm around Dani's shoulder. "Nico?"

He took a breath. "Juliette…is Dani okay?"

She snorted. "No and considering I'm pretty sure you just told her what I think you told her, she's not going to be for a bit. Fuck, I'm not okay. Fuck. I want to get higher than a kite right now…she doesn't deserve this shit Nico. No one does." She fought off the tears, but a small sob escaped anyway. "I hate them. I hate this. I hate feeling this shit and I want it to go away. Fuck you right now I hate you because I'm feeling it because I'm sober and I'm sober because of you."

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry…" Nico kept repeating.

"Stop being sorry big guy and pull it together. Dani needs you to be strong, fuck, so do I. You always are and I don't do this shit without you. So you better figure your shit out fucking fast because we're gonna be on your door step in just a few minutes." She wiped her face and glanced at Ray Jay, he looked confused. "Here talk to the other testosteroned one, he looks confused." She handed the phone off and pulled Dani into an awkward hug.

Ray Jay held the phone to his ear. "Uh, Nico?"

"Ray Jay, where are you?" Nico focused on details.

"Hang on…just turned onto Commercial Drive A and turning left now, the cop driving says we're gonna be there in a minute. What the fuck is going on? And so help me you tell me to watch my mouth I will knock you on your ass as soon as I see you."

Nico laughed and it actually felt good for a second. "Kid if you need to punch me, I'll give you one free shot. I promise." He sighed. "We have your sister. She's here."

"Okay, but mom's a mess, so…shit…" Ray Jay felt sick. He punched the bullet proof glass between the seats and then shook out his hand. He glared at the cop in the front seat when he threatened him. "I'm sorry about that, but deal with it. If you need to arrest me when this is done, fine, you can, I don't give a fuck and you might have more reasons when my ass gets out of this car."

"Ray Jay…Ray Jay…" Nico was trying to get his attention.

"What?!" He spoke into the phone again. "What the hell you were supposed to keep her safe." The car stopped and an officer on the outside opened the back door. "We're here, where are you?"

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Dani stepped out of the car and blinked. There were lights flashing, police lights, ambulance lights. There were detectives in plain clothes and uniformed officers. There was police tape up and a CSI unit van. No one would let them past the police tape.

"I want to see my daughter. I want Nico Careles here right now. Find Ben Carson, find me someone in charge." She was shaking and gripping Juliette so hard she knew she was bruising the girl, but then Juliette was doing the same to her.

Ray Jay had moved ahead and was pressing someone else for information. He was trying to find someone to get them inside. He saw Tommy and waved.

"Tommy, what the hell?"

Tommy jogged over. "We've been waiting on you inside."

"Fucking idiots won't let us in, won't find anyone for us to talk to…mom's about to kill someone." He growled at the officer who had driven them over. He'd begged the man to help them five or six times, but nothing.

Tommy didn't hesitate. He slipped past the police tape, grabbed Dani's hand and pulled her and Juliette under the tape with him. "Come on, both of you or the boss man will kill me."

An officer tried to stop them. "You can't take them back there."

Tommy turned around, "I can and I will. Detective Carson has been waiting on her to get here so we can transport the victim to the hospital and what? You've kept her up here for the past ten minutes? Are you fucking crazy?"

The uniform sputtered. "CSI said…"

"CSI isn't in charge of everything are they?" Tommy kept them moving even as he spoke. "They're still wrapping shit up with the Harper boys, the site's still active and people are trampling in and out. How can CSI even set up yet? So don't tell me CSI said bullshit."

He left the officer outside and moved the group inside. CSI had managed to set up some lighting so at least they could see as they turned the corner.

Dani gasped and put a hand to her lips. Her daughter was on a stretcher and she was pale. There was blood on her face and an IV in her arm. She couldn't see much more of her as she was surrounded by medics and covered in what looked like Nico's coat. Nico's back was to her and he stood guard beside her daughter with his arms crossed.

Nico must have heard her because he turned.

"Dani." He covered the short distance between them quickly and pulled her into his arms.

She clung to him, her face pressed against his shoulder. He held her so that she was facing Lindsay, as if he somehow knew she'd need to keep her in her line of sight. He probably did know it. She pulled back and looked at his face. She saw how much pain was in his eyes and she realized how much it hurt him and she wanted to love him more than she did, but she was so angry right now and so hurt for her baby. She pulled away from him and went to her daughter.

"Linds?" She held out her hand as she knelt on the dirty floor. "Baby…god, I'm so sorry baby…"

Her daughter turned to look at her. Her lip trembled and fat tears rolled down her cheeks. "Mommy…I…" she shook her head and sobbed, "I was so scared…I want to go home, please…I just want to go home."

Dani pulled her daughter into her arms and looked to Nico as she cried. "I know baby. I know and soon, we'll go home real soon." There wasn't anything else she could do right now, but she wanted to kill someone and scream and cry and ask a million questions. None of them were appropriate. None of them would do anything or make her daughter feel better or heal faster.

Lindsay pulled Nico's coat tighter around her shoulders when the EMT tried to move it. "Don't take it." She glared at him.

"I said I won't I just want to check your pulse and then look at your foot again." He glanced at Dani. "Her foot is bad. The cut is deep and we need to get her to the hospital as soon as we can. She probably needs surgery and then there's everything else."

He left the implied everything else.

Lindsay cleared her throat. "I'm not six and I'm not mentally ill." She wiped her face with the back of her hand. "I'm tired and they drugged me and I was sexually assaulted and I want to fucking go home. I also want the asshole you just dragged out of here shot, but that's not gonna happen." She sobbed again and pressed her face into Dani's shoulder. "I hate this mom. I hate it. I want home…I want my family. I want to feel safe."

Dani understood. She'd heard that from other rape victims before. The need to feel safe and the lack of feeling safe was a big theme with victims of violence across the board. She knew therapy could help, but it would be a long road. "Linds, right now you need to heal your body. Your foot is hurt and maybe other things…we need tests." Dani cringed inwardly, she hoped against hope there were no STDs, HIV, hepatitis. No pregnancy. "We need to get your body better and then we can work on how you feel. I need to let them take you to the hospital. I'll go with you."

Lindsay's face crumbled but she nodded. "Okay."

The EMT called in the hospital and then he and his partner, the paramedic who was actually doing most of Lindsay's care, started moving Lindsay toward their bus. "We're taking her to St. Joes, you can meet us there."

"I'm riding with you." Dani had been walking beside the stretcher. Now she stood outside the ambulance.

"Absolutely not, it's against the rules." The paramedic announced. "No one rides."

Lindsay started crying. "Mom, take me home then. Don't let them take me. I'm not going without you." She pulled at the IV and the EMT started strapping her down. "I don't know them…I want someone with me I know…you, Nico, someone." She was panicking now, thrashing and fighting the man as he tried to hold her down.

Dani moved closer to Lindsay to calm her down. She glared at the EMT. "Let her go."

The EMT stopped. "Ma'am she needs to stop pulling out the IV then."

"She will if you let me go with you." She brushed hair from her daughter's face. "She's scared. Do you fucking know what she's been through? Do you have a daughter, a wife, a girlfriend? Would you want strangers moving your daughter who was terrified?"

The EMT looked to the paramedic.

The paramedic shook his head. "I already said no."

Nico stepped into the medic's space. The paramedic was taller than the EMT and a bit more built. He was bigger than Nico, but that didn't matter. "Today you will be breaking them. Mom is riding with the girl, is that understood?"

The medic looked at Nico and shook his head. "I don't break rules."

Nico called to Ben and waved him over. "Ben, tell this idiot that Dani is riding with her daughter."

Ben looked at the guy's name tag. He didn't recognize him at all. "Jude, how about you do me a favor and let the girl's mom ride, she was just raped. You don't have a woman on your squad. It's not right. You get my drift? The girl is terrified and rightfully so."

Jude crossed his arms and shook his head. "Don't matter. I'm not breaking the rules. Only the injured are getting on my bus." He looked to the EMT. "I'll call the hospital and we'll sedate her if we have to."

Nico wanted to punch the guy in the head. "Fucking prick."

"You do not have my permission to do that." Dani was shaking and she turned to Nico. "I have to go with her Nico. I have to." She gripped his forearms and looked up at him. "Don't let them take my baby without me."

He pulled her against him and glared at the medic. He took a breath. He felt so useless today. He had one idea. He looked at the medic. "You go nowhere until Detective Carson clears you."

The medic shook his head. "As long as she's stable, which she is for now, but you're pushing it."

Nico looked at Ben. "Can you do something?"

Ben pulled out his phone. "I'll try." He walked a few steps away and made a call.

Nico looked over to Lindsay. She looked so pitiful. Juliette was with her now. The two of them were curled together on the gurney. How they managed that, he'd never know, but they did. They were holding each other. It broke his heart. The girl he loved the most in the world and the daughter of the woman he loved were huddled under his coat crying. Both of them had been broken because of the same fucked up family. He turned away.

He pulled Dani close and walked away from the small crowd, into the darker parts of the lot. "Dani, trust me."

Dani's eyes turned to his and she nodded at him instantly. She'd come to a point where she didn't need to think about that answer anymore. "Always."

Something inside of him swelled. He pulled Ronnie's knife from his waistband and unsheathed it. "If you're hurt, they let you ride." He pointed to the side of the loading dock. There had, at one time, been an iron rim pressed the entire length of the dock. Age and wear had worn it down. Weather had warped the wood and caused the iron to pop free, rust and twist. Now it was a rusty, jagged piece of metal at just about the right height. "I make a cut and after I cut you, you make it look like you scrape your arm over there."

"Why not just…?"

"The blade is clean, that isn't." He looked at her. "I can control this, you can't control that." He gave her a harder, darker look, something else in his eyes made her breath catch in an odd way. "I've done this before."

She looked into his face. "Nico…" she glanced down and away from what she saw there. Then she nodded. "Yes."

He held out his left hand. "Hold out your arm then, palm down and pull up your sleeve."

He tested the blade on the tip of his thumb, it was hellishly sharp. He whispered a thank you to Ronnie and then took her wrist in his hand. He saw her look away and then with measured force he pressed the blade into Dani's arm. The blade was so keen and cut so sharply that at first there was no bleeding. He dragged the blade down her arm. He heard her harsh gasp at the sudden sharp, burning sensation when the edge penetrated her skin and she hissed as the blade moved steadily down her arm parting skin and severing small nerve endings. He knew it was starting a small firestorm of sensation in her arm. He looked at her face and noticed how pale she was.

He rubbed his thumb softly across her wrist. His voice was hoarse when he whispered. "Almost done baby."

She nodded, but she wasn't watching since she still had her face turned to the side, but now she had her eyes squeezed shut and she was biting her lip.

Nico saw another tear run down her already tear streaked and swollen face and felt the tension in her body. She was vibrating beside him. He knew he needed to finish, but was being careful. He hadn't wanted to scar her, but he needed to cut deep enough to be convincing. When the cut was about six inches long he stopped. He exhaled and pulled the knife from her arm. "Should be good." He pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I love you."

Dani leaned into him and gripped his shirt with her good arm. She felt shaky, she felt a bit lightheaded, but she felt hopeful; right now she needed some hope. She pulled back and looked at the wound. "It's not bleeding…" No sooner had Dani said the words than blood began to ooze, and then flow at a steady rate.

Nico smirked. "Sorry about this too and I'll replace it, promise." He shoved the knife through the sleeve of her blouse and tore a jagged hole in it. "Gotta make it look good. Now go win an Emmy." He nodded toward the evil piece of jagged iron on the loading dock.

Dani's arm was starting to really hurt now. She was amazed at how much it was hurting because after the initial cut, it had gone a bit numb, but now that it was bleeding it was aching and throbbing.

She took two steps and then "accidentally" tripped. Her arm came up and she screamed. "Oh my god." She fell into the loading dock and then to the ground.

Before Dani "hurt" herself, Nico had moved across the lot to talk to Ben, but was stuck listening to him as he spoke on the phone to try to figure a way to get a female EMT down to the scene to ride in the squad with Lindsay. But, when he heard Dani scream, Nico rushed over to her.

"Dani, are you all right?"

Ben was right behind him. "Shit, she cut herself." He looked over at the squad that was gearing up to leave. He waved at Jude. "Hey, get your ass over here, she hurt herself." He looked at Dani. "You might just get that ride with your daughter after all Ms. Santino." He gave Nico a look. "Know anything about this Careles?"

Nico shook his head. "Was with you Carson." He was holding pressure to Dani's arm as he looked over at Ben. "How could I have had anything to do with this?"

Ben looked at him and shrugged. "Yea, that's true you were with me."

The medic cursed as he grabbed his bag and jogged to where they were. "What the hell?" He looked at her arm and then the rusty iron. He knelt beside Dani and then after his gloves were on, he assessed the wound. "Shit, well I doubt it needs stitches, but she'll need her tetanus updated. You could transport her yourself though."

He set his bag down and pulled out some gauze. He pressed it to the wound and eyed Nico and Dani and then he looked up at Ben. "Seems kinda straight and kinda conveniently timed though." He pulled out a roll of Kerlix and wrapped it around the gauze to hold it in place. He nodded at the iron piece. "Pretty damn jagged metal…awful straight cut, not deep, not dirty…rather suspicious."

Ben glared at Jude. "Look, you say one word and I will kick your ass. Pull you over for every moving violation in the world. Make your life fucking miserable. Now, transport this woman to the hospital with her daughter and do it fucking now."

Jude turned pale. "Fine, get in the rig." He picked up his bag, spun and climbed into the back of his truck.

Nico helped Dani into the back and settled her on the bench seat beside the paramedic. He climbed up, kissed her cheek and then he kissed Lindsay's too. "I'll meet you both there." He squeezed Dani's hand. "I love you."

She blinked back tears. She couldn't even explain how she felt right then. She was pretty close to throwing up. She nodded. "I know…I…I love you too." She kissed his hand and then let it go. Then she turned to Lindsay and grabbed her hands.

Nico hopped down, closed the door and tapped on the back. The ambulance lights flashed, the sirens wailed and he watched as it drove away.

Ben Carson put a hand on Nico's shoulder. "We have the Harper boys in custody. The young one, Tyler, he's an idiot and has run his mouth since we got him. I don't think either of them touched your girl, but it seems the plan was to sell her to the other piece of shit. I think your girl was trying to buy herself some time. We haven't gotten the entire story."

Nico shook his head. "Ben, right now I don't care. I want one promise from you."

"What's that?"

"That those boys aren't coming out, at least not for a long time. I think we have kidnapping, sexual slavery, she's underage, add that in and you've got more than enough. I want the young one up on adult charges if you can. I don't want his record sealed and him out in six months. Fuck that. He's habitual."

Carson nodded. "I'm pretty sure the DA's gonna side with you on that. I can't see him out anytime soon."

"I'd ask a favor too." Nico looked at him out of the corner of his eye. "Dr. Santino's son, Raymond Jr. He got wrapped up with the younger boy Tyler and then tried to make shit right. That's how we ended up here. He pulled some pot plants of Tyler's down, then got caught disposing of them. He tried to do the right thing and got screwed."

"I can probably do something about that. Work out a deal." He nodded. "After what the family's been through and you helped us. This could have gone much worse."

Nico nodded. "I'd appreciate it." He saw Ray Jay and Juliette with Tommy and Ronnie. He motioned them toward him. He held his hand to Ben and shook the man's hand when he took it. "Next time, pay more attention when I talk." He let go of the man's hand and moved toward his car, unlocking it as he did.

He held out the knife to Ronnie. "Thanks for this, it came in handy and I appreciate someone who keeps their weapons in good shape." He winked at her.

She gave him a puzzled look and took the knife. She inspected it and then hooked it to her belt. "Anytime boss, you heading to the hospital?"

He nodded and glanced from Tommy to Ronnie. "If you want, I'll pay for a cab for each of you."

Ronnie shook her head. "No, I'm hanging until we find out how Lindsay is." She hugged herself. She'd already called Angie and explained. Angie told her to take whatever time she needed, that she completely understood and she wouldn't expect anything else.

Tommy waved him off. "I'm gonna hitch a ride with one of the uniforms to the train station, it'll be faster."

"You sure?"

"That it's faster? Hell yea, like you aren't?" He nudged Nico's shoulder.

Nico appreciated his attempt to keep things light. "Okay, take tomorrow off."

Tommy nodded. "See you Wednesday then." He turned and walked away.

Juliette and Ray Jay were both in the back. Ray Jay had Juliette against him, they'd both been crying. Juliette still was, but right now Ray Jay wasn't. His jaw was set and clenched and Nico noticed the angry glint in his eye. He wanted and needed to hurt someone. Nico understood that feeling, probably more than anyone. He'd need to help the kid deal with it, but now wasn't the time.

Ronnie sat up front and Nico slid behind the wheel. It was going to be a long night.

He pulled out of the lot and headed toward the hospital. He checked the rearview mirror and caught Ray Jay's eyes.

"You okay Ray Jay?" He arched a brow.

The boy shook his head.

"So fucking far from okay man…so fucking far from it." His voice was cold.

Juliette sobbed into Ray Jay's shoulder and pulled his head down to whisper something in his ear.

Nico didn't hear what she said, but it seemed to calm him some.

Ronnie looked into the backseat. "You're sister's gonna need you there for her." She looked to Juliette and then Nico and back to the kids. "She's gonna need all of you. Don't let your anger get in the way. She's angry and hurt enough for all of us, okay. Just be what she needs, don't be selfish about what you need."

Nico reached a hand across the seat and took Ronnie's. He squeezed it. She was right. It was easy to let anger get in the way. "Thanks."

She shrugged. "Anytime." She squeezed his hand and let it go. She turned to look out the window. She could have only wished for anyone to be angry about what had happened to her. She had been the only one…the only one until Angie.

The rest of the ride to the hospital was silent. Everyone was stuck in their own thoughts.

Nico took a breath. A few days ago things were falling into place. Now, the people he loved and were starting to love were breaking into pieces. Juliette flat out told him he needed to be strong for her and for Dani. He knew Dani needed him. He felt as if Lindsay blamed him. If only he had been there earlier…sooner, he could have saved her…kept her from being raped.

He hit the steering wheel. No one said anything to him and he didn't apologize. He kept staring straight ahead. He knew Ray Jay had something he wanted to say to him. It was in the boy's eyes. Fine, so if everyone wanted to blame him. They could stand in fucking line.

He already blamed himself more than anyone else. Guilt lived deep inside him. He lived with it from long ago. He'd add it to the well that started with Mikey. He'd find a way to make this right and if not right; then better. He had his pain, but he'd hide it. He'd deal with it his own way. He'd be strong for Dani, Lindsay, Juliette and he'd deal with Ray Jay, even if it did make him feel hollow and empty on the inside.


	20. Come Together and Fall Apart

**_NOTE:_** Hooray, an early update for all of you, for reasons unknown. Well, they're known but mildly secretive.

Simply getting ducks in a row this chapter, more ducks need rowing, but this wraps up many of them. There is one little one left to deal with, plus emotional crap. And I left a bit of drama for the next chapter and since I don't like the character I brought in at the end, you'll have to read to find out who, that one had to wait cause I just didn't care enough to finish it up here. That and I'm mean...lol.

Tissues...you still might need them, but not nearly like last chapter. Maybe a dab here or there, would depend on whether I'm PMS-ing or not. Hey, I'm just being honest. Typical warnings about typos and such: this is only edited by me, which means it's not. No beta because then you'd never get a chapter.

Thanks for the reviews and dang to all you Ray Jay haters...poor boy. Don't hate on my Ray Jay, but then again just means you read it exactly how I wrote it, but try to "see" it like it might be ;) Read people...read because I clear it up for you.

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**Come Together and Fall Apart **

The hospital lot was full. Nico cursed and circled back through. He finally found a spot on an upper level. He pulled in just as a beat up Jaguar pulled out. He parked and sat behind the wheel to collect his thoughts as the doors to his car opened and closed around him. Then he took a breath and followed the others out into the garage. The air was brisk and he pocketed his keys, making note of the parking space number and level. He watched as Ronnie and Juliette waited by the elevator at the edge of the garage level.

He glanced behind the Lincoln to see Ray Jay leaning against one of the cement pillars. The kid was all anger and attitude right now and he was checking something on his phone.

"Ray Jay."

The boy looked at him and then back at his phone before he pushed from the pillar and put the phone into his pocket. "What?"

Nico moved toward him, meeting him halfway even as he checked on the girls. He waved at Ronnie, "We'll catch up in a few, tell Dani."

Ronnie nodded and then she and Juliette disappeared into the elevator.

"I want you to talk to me." Nico stood in front of him, sure to take up plenty of space as he leaned over him.

Ray Jay glared up at him, his eyes blazed and his hands fisted at his side.

"I want to know what your problem with me is kid." Nico's voice was quiet. His words were measured and easy. "Enough posturing, just say it. Let's deal with it so we can go take care of your sister." He kept his eye on Ray Jay's face. "I have enough shit on my plate right now. I'd like to clear one problem."

He shook his head and his lip trembled. "What?" His eyes clouded and sniffed. He wiped his face and he looked away for a second and then he looked back at Nico, but his shoulders were slumped, the fight out of his eyes. "You aren't…I mean…Shit." His voice caught, not quite cracking. He moved to lean against the trunk of the car. "I can't do this." He hugged himself. "I can't go in there."

Nico was confused. He followed suit and leaned against his car, crossed his arms casually against the chill. "She's safe Ray Jay." He watched Ray Jay. "Are you gonna be okay?"

"Fuck, dude, no…" He wiped at his cheek. "And you tell anyone I'm crying and I really will punch you."

"Ray Jay, men cry; real ones anyway. I did plenty of it today. Feel free to ask your sister, Ronnie, Tommy, your mom or any of those asshole cops. I cried my eyes out." He paused and caught Ray Jay looking at him out of the corner of his eye. "I did kid, just like a big girl and I'll probably do some more. Your sister is hurt, bad. And even though she's safe now, it hurts me to see her hurt. It hurts me to see your mom hurting and damn it, I'm pissed the hell off." He pushed a hand through his hair. "Men cry and if anyone tries to tell you otherwise they're either lying or they're total fucking, what is it you kids call them today, douchebags?" He leaned a shoulder into Ray Jay's. "And, you go ahead, try to punch me, kid; I'll lay you out."

He snorted. "You can try old man." He wiped his face again and looked at Nico; seriously now. "You aren't gonna like kick my ass?"

Nico turned, his hip against the car, so he could see Ray Jay. He arched an eyebrow. "Unless you did something I don't know about…No. Wait, my roses aren't dead are they?"

Ray Jay rolled his eyes. "Dude your damn thorn bushes are fine."

"Flowering shrubs."

"Whatever…they're fine." He huffed.

"So, what am I going to kick your ass about then?"

He shrugged sullenly.

"Huh, I'm sure you have a pretty damn good idea exactly why you think I might kick your ass."

Ray Jay's eyes met Nico's. There was guilt there. Nico knew it because he used to see it in his own eyes every day. Still did on a bad day.

"Shit Ray Jay…" He exhaled, he'd totally read the kid wrong.

He shook his head. "It's my fault Nico. I deserve it, you should kick my ass." He hiccupped and waved his hand around the lot. "All of it, all of it is my fault. I mean yea, I got arrested and all, but this thing with us worrying and then shit…" He moved away from the car and paced to the cement pillar and back.

Tears were on his cheeks. "Lindsay was taken because of me." He stopped in front of Nico and stared into his eyes. "ME. My fault Nico. I'm the idiot, the fuck up. I got my sister kidnapped. I let those pieces of shit hurt her…god Nico I let them…" his voice trailed off to a whisper, "rape her." He was holding back his tears when he finished.

Nico grabbed his arms to stop him. The kid was out of control now. "Ray Jay listen to me, you didn't do it. You didn't, okay?" He shook him gently. "I want you to hear me. Lindsay told Ronnie she was hurt and assaulted, but he didn't rape her." He looked at the kid's face. "It doesn't make it much better. I saw what he did…how far he got." He closed his eyes for a second, pulled his thoughts together, and then he opened his eyes again. "I dragged the fucker off her, Ray Jay, but he didn't finish…he didn't take that last step. It doesn't trivialize what happened to her, make it less traumatic, but it's something. And that it didn't happen is a big deal to Lindsay."

The boy stood there, eyes wide, a few tears on his cheeks, and then the dam broke. There was a heart wrenching sob and he collapsed against the man in front of him. "She's my sister, baby sister Nico…I'm…supposed to help protect her…" He sobbed out his words against Nico's chest. "Mom…I'm…I let both of them down…how…how am I ever going to…to…" He didn't finish, he couldn't, so he just cried.

"Shh," Nico knew how he felt. He remembered and really, Ray Jay wasn't directly responsible for anything. "You fucked up, but you didn't do THIS, but sometimes the shit we do has consequences we don't see. You learned a hard lesson today. Life kicks you in the balls, she's a bitch." He waited; let the kid pull himself together. "Your mother and sister love you, no matter what." He hugged him.

Ray Jay nodded and lifted his head. "I know. I just don't deserve it." He stepped back and wiped his face with his sleeve.

"We never do, that's what makes love special Ray Jay. You get it even when you don't deserve it. You fuck up and people keep loving you. If they only loved you when you were perfect, it wouldn't be worth much would it?" He wiped at the wet spots on his dark shirt with a bit of exaggeration.

"Guess not, never thought of it that way." He motioned to the shirt, "and um, sorry…and anyway we can keep the whole chick flick moment to ourselves. I mean, I do have a reputation."

Nico bit back a smile. "Wouldn't want to ruin your street cred, got it." He nudged Ray Jay's shoulder. "You gonna be okay kid?"

He shrugged and then nodded. "Yea, eventually…I'm pissed at myself and that guy that hurt her and Tyler and Mason." He looked at Nico. "I'd like to hurt someone."

"It's good to be a little pissed at yourself. It helps to keep you from fucking up next time." He lightly slapped the back of Ray Jay's head. "Tell you what, when we know your sister is okay and things are a little calmer, I'll take you to my gym. You and I can go a few rounds in the boxing ring." He motioned to the elevator and started moving slowly toward it.

"Really, you'd do that with me?" Ray Jay looked up at him from under his lashes as he surveyed the ground.

Nico nodded. "Sure, I'll whip your ass for you." He smirked at him.

"Oh, that's what you think old man…that's what you think…" He smiled and wiped a few stray tears from his face. "I do have a good right hook."

Nico flashed him a smile he didn't really feel and hit the down button. He had misread Ray Jay's guilt as anger toward him. Maybe it was because he wanted someone to be angry at him. He wanted someone to blame him. It was easier for him that way. He didn't like feeling helpless and right now, he was really feeling that way. He was also regretting not finishing what he had started with Lewis.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Dani watched from the corner of the private little ER alcove they'd put them in as the doctor checked her daughter's foot and nurses drew blood. They'd tried several times to take Nico's coat, but every time Lindsay screamed, so they'd given up. Dani had insisted on a Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner for the rape exam, but they were waiting on her to arrive from home since they didn't have one on staff fulltime. The ER doctor was being a bit of an ass and at first Dani was wondering if she was going to have to call Nico up from the parking lot, but one of the ER nurses stepped up and told the bitch that's what the SANE program was for so they were going to use it. Not to mention that rape kits collected by SANE graduates had better conviction rates. Dani knew the statistics.

Someone wanted to check Dani's arm, but she pushed them away. "After I know my daughter is okay, but thank you." She put her hand over the bandaged wound and the pressure made it throb. Tears were in her eyes, but it wasn't from the pain. It was the emotion it invoked. Somehow, she wasn't sure what it was, but in some twisted way that pain and the fact that Nico did it to her and for her made her realize how much he loved her.

Someone put a hand on her shoulder and she looked up to see Ronnie with a cup of coffee in her hand.

"Thought you might want something to drink." She handed her the cup. She'd gotten it from the café in the lobby, not the vending machine in the waiting room.

"Thanks." Dani took the cup in both hands and simply held it, her eyes on her daughter. "Where's Juliette?" She glanced up, over her shoulder.

"She's in the waiting room. They really didn't want to let me in here. I said I was bringing you coffee." She pulled a stool over and sat down. Her voice was quiet. "Dani, did Lindsay tell you anything in the ambulance?"

Dani turned and looked at her. She shook her head. "No, she dozed off in the ambulance and then woke in a panic thinking I wasn't really there…that Nico hadn't saved her." Tears started again and she bit her lip. "God, my baby…" She wiped her face with the napkin that had been wrapped around her coffee.

The bodyguard took Dani's hand. "She told me a few things and I think you should know them." She took a breath and looked the other woman in the eye. "It doesn't make it easier, but he never penetrated her with more than his fingers. Nico stopped him and beat him near to death and when I say near to death. I mean it. If Tommy wouldn't have stopped him, the guy would be in pieces and he deserved it, trust me. And it's not like we knew he hadn't actually finished at that point, because it sure as hell looked like he'd crossed the line when we found them."

Dani's hand flew to her mouth and she sat there. Ronnie was right, it wasn't good news, but it did mean that certain things were better. Lindsay didn't need to worry about being pregnant, or certain STDs. A weight was lifted. The sexual assault, the fear and the emotional turmoil would all still be there. Lindsay had still lost a piece of her innocence. She would still feel as if she had been raped, she had, but Dani nodded and leaned in to hug Ronnie.

"Thank you." Her voice was hoarse with emotion. "I…" she nodded, "I needed to hear that, thank you for helping her today…for being here now."

Ronnie nodded and squeezed Dani's shoulder. "If I can help, let me know. I'm going to sit with Jules." Then she stood and left.

After a minute Dani carried her coffee and went to her daughter's side. It was hard being there, seeing Lindsay so pale and broken hurt her. She'd refused pain medication. She told them she was afraid to close her eyes. Even when they examined her foot and she screamed she still refused. They'd asked Dani, she talked to her, but Lindsay had begged her not to let them. Her daughter wasn't stupid, she knew what she wanted and Dani wasn't going to force her. She was afraid for a reason. She refused to give consent, so she'd held her while she screamed and rocked her afterward.

Lindsay was exhausted after that and she dozed off and on, as long as Nico's coat was with her, she stayed calm, so they'd learned to leave it.

Dani whispered her daughter's name. "Linds…hey baby." She waited until Lindsay's eyes opened and recognition sparked her eyes before she touched her face and pushed her hair form her cheek. "You hanging in there?"

Lindsay whimpered and pulled the coat to her nose and then pressed Dani's palm to her cheek with her own palm. "Mom." She breathed out and looked around, a little panicked. "Hospital, right?"

Dani nodded. She kept getting confused and the doctors were pretty sure it was whatever drug they'd used on her, but they weren't sure. They wanted to do a CT scan, but Lindsay wouldn't let them yet. She couldn't remember if she'd been hit in the head or not. "Yea sweetheart, you're in the hospital." She tucked hair behind her ear and then bent and kissed her forehead. "You're safe."

Dani watched her daughter press her eyes shut as tears escaped past the lids. She bit her lip and shook her head. She watched her daughter pull the coat tight around herself and inhale the scent from it. Dani knew that scent. It made her feel safe too and she couldn't resist doing the same.

"How come I don't feel safe mom…Every time I close my eyes I see him, but when open them I think he's going to be there." She hiccuped. "I think next person in the room will be him. When someone touches me I think of him…and the smell mom, I can't get the way he smelled out of my head." She gagged. "Oh god, I'm gonna be sick again."

Dani straightened and helped her daughter sit up, she pulled a washbasin from the table beside her and held it while Lindsay wretched. Again, nothing came up. She rubbed her back and when she was done, she held her. "Shh, it's okay baby…it's okay…"

A nurse showed up a few seconds later. "Was she sick? Oh honey we can give you something for the nausea and it'll help you sleep." She took the basin from Dani and handed her a cool, wet washcloth.

Dani took it and wiped Lindsay's face.

Lindsay shook her head and looked at her mother as she settled back on the pillow. She grabbed Dani's wrist. "Don't let them mom. No more drugs…please."

Dani looked to the nurse. "She doesn't want anything that will sedate her, we've already been through this. She still needs to talk to the police and really where is the SANE nurse? We need to get that done so they can get her foot taken care of properly."

The nurse nodded. "I think the counselor and SANE nurse are prepping the room now, they'll be in to introduce themselves in a minute and I actually came in to tell you that your husband is outside." She smiled at him as she left.

Dani sat up, puzzled. Who had called Ray, the police? She looked back at the door to see Nico and she smiled.

He was leaning in the doorframe and he shrugged. "I did not tell them I was your husband."

"They just assumed?" She squinted at him.

He moved into the room. "Ray Jay uttered the words, like a step dad, the woman at the desk heard only step dad." He took Dani's hand and reached for Lindsay's. "Hey sweetheart, coat still looks better on you than me." He winked at her.

Lindsay squeezed his hand and pulled it to her chest. "It's saving my life right now…like you did then." She closed her eyes against a fresh onslaught of tears. "Thank you for coming for me." She looked up at him, her vision blurred. "I knew you would, I told them you would if they would call you even figure something out…they were going to, but then then…" She started sobbing and pulled the coat back up around her. "Thank you for stopping him…" Her voice trailed off and she nodded, her hand gripping his.

He pressed closer to Dani, kissed the top of her head and then wiped his eyes when Dani released his hand. He bent over Lindsay and kissed her forehead. "You're welcome Lindsay. I love your mother and that love extends to you too. I'll do anything I can to keep you safe. I wish I could have done more." He stood and realized he meant it. He hadn't loved anyone in such a long time he had started to wonder if he was capable of love anymore. He was starting to realize all he had to do was open his heart back up to it.

Dani pressed a hand against the cut on her arm. It was throbbing in time with her heart, which she thought would burst. She had so much to say…but god, now was not the time or place. Her thoughts were interrupted by a knock.

She and Nico turned to the doorway.

A woman, probably in her mid-thirties, stood there in casual clothes. She carried a duffle bag and she had name tag on. She smiled politely. "Is it okay if I come in? I'm Teresa Cowman, I'm here to do the exam and interview." She held out her hand. "You can call me Teresa."

She took Dani's hand and then Nico's. "I'm sorry about what happened and Mr. Careles, we've met before you know of course. Are you here on team business?" Her tone changed when she asked the question.

He shook his head. "No." He pulled Dani against him and wrapped his arms around her. "This is most definitely personal."

Teresa's demeanor softened, "I am of course sorry." She gave him a long look.

He nodded.

Teresa's focus then shifted to Lindsay. She smiled softly and pulled a chair up and sat down. She pulled computer from her bag and glanced over to Nico and Dani. "You might want to have a seat. Lindsay and I are going to get acquainted her for a bit. Is it okay if they stay, because I'm going to ask you some personal questions?" When Lindsay nodded, she started chatting to Lindsay about school as she waited for the computer to switch on and after a few minutes she asked her age and height, grade and school. The questions then moved on to her medical history, then her sexual history. Teresa was good and kept the questions moving along. Then she got to the incident and she sat back.

"Lindsay, now here's the hard part. I need you to tell me everything you can remember about what happened to you from the first time you saw people that hurt you, to when the police got there and stopped the men."

"Nico." Lindsay's voice was clipped.

"What?"

"Nico got there, he found me, not the police."

"The police didn't find you?"

"I just said that. No, Nico, Ronnie and Tommy found me." She pulled the coat down from her face and nodded at Teresa.

"Who are they?"

"They work for the Hawks, security for the Hawks."

Teresa looked over her shoulder and frowned. "I thought you said this was personal?"

He was leaning against the wall with his arms crossed. Dani was sitting in the chair beside him. He motioned to Dani. "We both work for the Hawks, we're dating. Trust me, I take it pretty fucking personal when someone kidnaps, tortures and almost rapes the daughter of the woman I love."

Teresa was taken aback by the intensity of his emotion. "Okay." She turned back to Lindsay. "Now, I asked you earlier, but I'll ask again; do you want privacy for the rest of the interview? Would you like your mother or Mr. Careles to leave the room? I could have the counselor come in as witness."

Lindsay rolled her head on the pillow and looked at the couple against the wall. She shook her head. "N…" She cleared her throat. "No, Nico was there, he saw it…I can't tell him much worse than what he saw and I'll tell mom everything anyway. It makes it easier this way."

Nico put his hand on Dani's shoulder. She was going to need his strength, shit he might need hers.

Dani gripped the hand on her shoulder desperately and then she stood and leaned into the man who offered it. She let him wrap his arms around her and murmur something into her hair. She didn't hear the words and she didn't even care what they were, but they made her feel better anyway. She pressed her ear to his chest and just stayed there. She figured she could stay there forever. She wanted to; right now it's what she needed. She listened to Lindsay's story with equal parts fear, sorrow, anger and pain.

Nico knew the ending, he'd been there, but the story just made him tense. In fact by the end of it, he was tenser than he had been in quite some time and frustrated. He understood Ray Jay's need to hit something, to break something, because he had wanted to kill Lewis in that old factory right after he'd pulled him off Lindsay. If Tommy hadn't stopped him, he would have. They'd moved Lindsay to another room for the actual rape exam and Nico excused himself for that. Lindsay had said she was fine with him being there and he understood what she meant. He had seen her. He had seen everything, and during the exam she would be covered and he would be behind a curtain, but still. He had no business there. So, he excused himself and Dani and Juliette were with her now.

At the present time, he found himself in the chapel. He chose the chapel because it was quiet and the seats were comfortable. He'd realized that after spending many, many nights in hospitals. Chapels were often good places to hide and good places to nap. He really didn't mean to fall asleep, but somehow he must have because he ended up dreaming.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

There was a warm hand on his shoulder, only there shouldn't be. She shouldn't be touching him, he'd made the rules clear and he smiled as he reached for her hand. He twisted her wrist and his body. He heard her gasp and he almost shivered in anticipation at what he'd do next. Then he was confused. The weight, the counterweight and the pull against him wasn't right and the punch to his jaw, well that definitely wasn't right.

He grunted and opened one eye as he reached for his jaw, rubbing at it. It hadn't been a particularly hard punch. "What the…?"

"You tell me." Ronnie stood beside him, arms crossed over her chest as she glared down at him. "All I did was call your name and put a hand on your shoulder to wake your ass up." She shook her head and raised one eyebrow all Jersey girl attitude style. "You tried to flip me on my ass."

He opened and shut his jaw and shrugged. "I was dreaming, you know us ex-military; probably war flashback or something."

She snorted and nodded to his lap. "Yea, and what war were you waging in that flashback boss? You're pitching some kinda tent there."

He glared at her and adjusted himself. "Do not say one more word." His voice was a quiet command and it echoed in his eyes.

He tried to shake off the dream. It had nothing to do with the military, but it was from his past. He wiped a hand over his face, shit he knew what had brought the memory up and now he just wished it would go away. He shook his head and focused on Ronnie.

She made a zipping motion across her lips. "Nada…" She smirked. "You've been gone for a while, Dani was wandering where you were. They finished Lindsay's exam. It seems to confirm what she said. No intercourse, no semen, but they swabbed for STDs anyway and they'll run the HIV, RPR and pregnancy tests because they do. She had skin scrapings under her nails, they collected that. There was blood on her consistent with someone other than her. They found some in her hair and some on her face and hands, maybe two people since it looks like two blood types. That's all initial findings. Nothing's confirmed."

Nico nodded. "It's good news and I assume we're waiting on drug testing to confirm what they gave her." He took a breath, forced the tension from his neck and arms. He glanced up as an elderly couple came in and headed to the front to actually pray.

She leaned against the wall. "Yep, so nothing we didn't expect. Now, they want to put her through a CT for her head to make sure it's just the drugs messing with her and of course they need to do surgery on her foot." She cocked her head to the side. He looked off. "You okay?"

He stood and stepped toward her. "I'm just a little," he looked down at her, not that it was far down, the woman was tall. "Tense," he arched an eyebrow, "frustrated, hyped up...like I've lost control." He glanced to her hip and then he leaned in closer so only she could hear, "I feel a bit violent. I still want to kill that son of a bitch."

She snorted. "Boss, you just about did kill him." She nodded to the door. "Come on, we need to get back. I get what you're saying, but Dani needs you and so does that kid." She shook her head. "You saved her. You are her personal Jesus now and like it or not, she's freaking some without you around."

_Later…_

Nico pulled the thin blanket up over Dani and tucked it around her shoulders. She was stretched out on the small recliner by Lindsay's bed while he sat in the straight backed chair with his feet on up the lowered side rails. He reviewed the past few hours in his head.

Once she was out of recovery, he'd asked Ronnie to take his car and drive Ray Jay home and take Juliette back to rehab. He'd called Corinne himself, woke her up at five in the morning so she knew she'd be there.

Juliette wasn't happy, but then, she didn't have a choice. Nico sent Ronnie and Ray Jay to get the car and bring it around out front and then walked Juliette down so he could talk to her.

"You okay?" He knew she had missed a dose of medication and was hurting. She'd been scratching and irritable.

She nodded at him. "I'm a little sick to my stomach, but…" she shrugged and wiped her eyes. She'd been crying off and on. "I wish it hadn't happened to her. She doesn't deserve this shit." She looked up at him from behind her hair.

Nico wish she'd pull her hair back. She only let her hair do that when she was high or messed up from the drugs. When she was clean she pulled it back or tucked it behind her ears. He couldn't resist and he tucked a piece behind her ear so he could see her face. He traced her jawline and gave her a sad smile. "No, she didn't, but you never deserved it either Juliette." He lifted her face by her chin. "I wish you believed that. You are worth more than you believe."

She shook her head. "I've done so much bad Nico, so much. I've hurt so many people." She shrugged. "You…dad, even mom, okay maybe mom deserved whatever she got, but?" She gave him an ornery smile.

He chuckled. "That's not what I meant and you know it." He tapped her nose with his index finger. "Don't sell yourself short. You have a lot to offer and you make me smile. You make me proud."

He pulled her into his arms. "I love you."

She stood there for a few seconds and then she wrapped her arms around him and hugged him back. "I, uh…love you too." When she pulled back she wiped her eyes and looked at him surprised to see him wiping his. "What's with all the- I love you shit?"

He shrugged. "I want to make sure you know it."

"I've always known you loved me." She looked at the ground. "You, I've never doubted."

"Good." He tugged a piece of her hair lightly. "What did you say to Ray Jay in the car earlier, on the way over here?"

She giggled and looked up at him. "You mean to calm him down?"

He nodded and crossed his arms; waiting.

"I really shouldn't tell you." She smirked at him and when he raised an eyebrow and thinned his lips at her she sighed. "Fine, but you're not going to like hearing it." She took a breath. "I told him that if stopped being an ass to you I'd blow him."

Nico coughed and then laughed. "Tell me you were kidding."

Her hair moved in front of her face again and she smiled from behind it. "Well, I was and I meant it as a joke and I think the kid took it as one. Hell, I hope he did."

Nico rolled his eyes. "You should have been spanked as a child."

"I'm probably not too old. Are you volunteering?" She cocked her head to the side.

He cleared his throat as he realized he completely set himself up for that. "That was totally inappropriate Juliette."

She sighed. "And if it wasn't you I said it to, it would have been hilarious…yea, yea I get it." She crossed her arms. "Fine, sorry."

He leaned against the railing behind him and rubbed the back of his neck. "Forgiven, but I always forgive you Juliette." He smiled at her. "Corinne will be waiting for you and I'll have a car for you on Friday if one of us can't be there to pick you up."

She nodded at him. "Thank you by the way."

"For what?"

She grabbed his hand. "Taking care of me…all these years. I'm here because of you." She stared at the ground. "When I was on that stretcher with Lindsay I realized that I could be dead somewhere, but time and time again you pulled me out of worse places than that." She looked up at him. "Maybe not physically, but you did. I always thought about you and dad. Dad would call…that damn phone would ring and fuck then you'd call later and you'd leave a message." She smiled and shook her head. "I always listened to it. Sometimes I cursed at you, but I listened and you kept me alive Nico. Just like you kept her alive." She stood up on her tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his cheek. Then she whispered softly. "And thanks for that too. I like her, she's like a sister. I want her around."

He swallowed the lump in his throat and gripped her hand. "I want you both around." He saw the Lincoln coming up the drive. "Ronnie's here. I'll see you Friday." He lifted her hand and kissed the top of it. "I love you, always will." He looked her in the eye. "Now, behave."

She giggled and rolled her eyes. "When don't I?" She pulled her hand away and waved as the car pulled up.

He shook his head. "Never."

He'd watched the car leave and then returned to Lindsay's room where he found Lindsay still sedated from surgery and Dani awake, but worried, in the recliner. She was exhausted, but no matter what he said, she had been reluctant to sleep. Eventually, he promised her that he'd stay awake and if Lindsay roused, he would wake her. Even then she fought to stay alert and she finally only gave in when her body's need won out and she collapsed.

So far, both mother and daughter had remained asleep and he kept his vigil. The chair made it easy. It was difficult to get comfortable. His phone vibrated and he shifted so he could pull it from his pocket. It was Carson. He answered and stood, moving across the room so he could talk quietly.

"Careles."

"It's Carson, just wanted to touch base. How's the girl?"

Nico sighed. "She's okay physically. The foot's a mess, cut through a couple tendons, they repaired it, but she's going to need therapy. She lost some blood, nerve damage, so wait and see. Her head CT was clear. Tox screen showed heroin and MDMA on prelim, waiting for confirmation. You have the samples taken from the rape kit. I hope you rushed them. I know how the crime lab back logs that shit." He paused. "I'll personally pay for a private forensics lab, cost is not an issue." He let that sit a second and then he added. "She says he never finished, it was assault, not rape and the examiner confirmed that. As far as how she is emotionally, well she needs time, so we'll see."

"I have the lab working on it now. The FBI is involved since they were before, she's underage and then there's the slavery thing. That makes this a big deal with them." He sighed. "I hate this shit."

"What aren't you saying?"

"The boys were raising money to leave the country. Part of it was selling her to Lewis. That was the final piece. Five grand and he took her virginity…shit there are still good girls her age, damn. That's a kick in the balls, kid doesn't deserve that fuckhead touching her."

"No one deserves being raped, ever." Nico's hand fisted and his words were cold.

"Well, fuck no, but…anyway, the first part of the plan, that's why she'd been drugged."

"What did they do to her?" His heart raced and his gut turned cold. Shit, he already knew. "Fucking internet…how many sites did you find?"

"Shit, we're shutting them down left and right, but they keep popping up and I'm sure some asshole has the file cached somewhere and you know how that goes. She's beautiful and underage and she looks it in the video, fuck it's exactly what they look for."

Nico took a deep breath and squeezed his eyes shut. There was no way to fix this. No way to control this. He didn't know what to do. "Okay, do what you can. I have a guy and I'll do what I can. I need you to send the video code though. We need to know what we're looking for and I need you to stay off my guy's IP address."

"I can do that as long as I know who he is and that he's on our side."

"I'll have him contact you. He's paranoid." Nico liked him that way. "It won't be long. He'll call your phone, he can probably hack the computer and find what he needs if he knows the landline number."

Ben laughed. "I doubt it."

Nico shook his head. "Don't laugh him off. He's probably been inside already." Fuck you Ben Carson. "He'll call."

Nico hung up.

"Nico?"

Shit, he looked over and saw Dani sit up. "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you baby." He tried to hide his agitation.

Dani glanced at her daughter and frowned. "She hasn't woken up yet?"

He shook his head. "No, she's fine Dani." He sighed and moved toward the bed. "She was in pain all day, scared, exhausted. Then you have to add in that she didn't eat or sleep." He sat in the chair he'd been in. "Then she had surgery. She's catching up baby."

She bit her lip. "You're sure?"

He brushed hair from Dani's eyes and motioned to the monitors on the wall. "Her pulse and blood pressure are good. They've been steady all night. She's been breathing fine and she hasn't made a sound. She looks peaceful. She rouses when the nurse checks on her, mumbles your name or mine and then she's out again."

"Okay." She motioned to the phone. "Who was on the phone?"

"Detective Carson," he debated what to tell her.

"What did he want?" She sat forward, leaned on her knees and stretched her back. "Uhg, I'm tight." She stood and stretched some more. "Any news?"

He frowned and looked at the floor. "I don't want to tell you right now Dani."

She gasped. "The boys aren't out are they?"

He shook his head. "No, and they aren't going to be…none of them. That's not a problem at this point." He stood up and put his hands on Dani's shoulders. "They interviewed the boys and found out what happened before Lindsay woke up."

Dani looked at her daughter in the bed. "She wasn't raped." She shook her head side to side. "We know that."

Nico nodded. "Yes, we know Lewis didn't rape her, we know she was; how was it that Teresa put it, violated, but not violently and we assume it was Lewis and his fingers." God saying that made Nico sick to his stomach. "I'd like to break his arm off and shove it up his ass."

"You have my vote." Dani whispered leaning suddenly hard against his chest. "Please tell me what you need to tell me."

"While she was unconscious they made a video Dani." He kept her against his chest. His hands moved up and down her back. "It's on the internet. It's being traded and sold for money. Carson's unit and the FBI are trying to shut it down, but the net is hard to control and once you close one site another pops up…a mirror site. While you shut that down, another version is being cached somewhere, and some other sick bastard uploads the version he has. It's a vicious cycle."

Dani was still while he spoke. She was in complete shock and then reality sank in and she felt dizzy and sick. She was glad Nico was holding her. She kept her head pressed to his chest and nodded. She didn't cry, but she wanted to. She wanted to kill the boys too.

She lifted her head and looked up at his face. "You should have killed him."

He swallowed. He'd never heard Dani sound so cold. He nodded at her. He understood the feeling and that need. He sighed. "I've regretted it every second since Tommy pulled me off him; trust me, but eventually that feeling does go away. It will fade." He kissed her forehead. "He isn't even the one who made the video. The boys are the ones who made the video. The boys are the ones who kidnapped her and planned this thing. They're the ones who sold her to him. He still decided it was okay to do, but they gave him the opportunity. He wasn't going to find her." He slid his arms around her. "They are fucked up monsters and I didn't even get a chance to see them."

Dani stood there. "What do we do?"

He took a breath. "I'm going to call AJ. He's the best I know and he's going to work on it along with the FBI, who only sort of work on it. AJ will scour the net for this video and keep doing it, just like he does for Juliette's. Then he tracks it down and anyone who has it is reported to the authorities and prosecuted as well."

"Good, do it." She nodded and glanced at the clock. "Shit it's Tuesday morning. You have work…I have a client I need to cancel…the kids have school." She teared up.

Nico put his hand on her's and looked her in the eyes. "Dani calm down, I already called the schools and left a message that neither of the kids will be there. I checked your calendar and sent a text message to the woman on your calendar that you needed to cancel until next week and the Hawks are more than aware of the situation."

She giggled. "You did all that?"

He nodded. "I am productive early in the morning when I can't sleep." He winked at her. "You should know that."

She rolled her eyes. Then her eyes went wide. "Oh shit. Ray…no one called Ray." She pulled her hand from Nico and turned to find her purse.

"Dani, stop…Dani." He finally just wrapped his arms around her, picked her up and put her down on the other side of the room. "Hey."

She finally paid attention. "Oh what the hell are you doing?"

He shook his head at her and gave her a wry smile. "Trying to get your damned attention," he couldn't resist pulling her against him and sinking his hands into her hair. "You're very cute when you're frustrated." He bent and as he did he angled her head so he could capture her lips easier.

He hadn't meant the kiss to be anything more than quick and gentle, but as soon as their lips met that all changed. It wasn't a one sided change either. The kiss moved from gentle to scorching faster than either of them expected.

Dani clung to him and pressed against him as if she'd been in the desert for a month and he was an oasis. She had no idea what happened, but she needed him and wanted him so desperately it was a physical need almost like breathing.

Nico was amazed at the passion that Dani was kissing with and all he could do was return it in kind. He felt the same and he'd needed it and so much more all night. Even before his dream, he'd wanted and needed to reaffirm his love for this woman. His woman.

He pulled back with a frustrated growl. "Not here Dani." He held her away from him. He was panting, so was she and he watched her eyes cloud with need and knew his looked exactly the same, but more dangerous. "God, I want to, but not here." He motioned her to her chair. "Go. Sit back down before I change my mind."

She stood for a second. She wanted to tell him to go to hell and then press herself back against him, but he was right and she knew it. She touched her lips because they were on fire and she nodded. "Yea…okay."

He took a breath. "I was trying to tell you that I called Ray. He knows, but he's stuck in Colorado. It snowed, but I think there was a flight out this morning. He should be here soon. I took care of it, I'm not sure when the first flight was, but he's booked on it."

She nodded and she started crying.

"Why are you crying?" He grabbed the small box of tissues from the over bed table and took his place in the chair he'd occupied all night.

She took two tissues and wiped her face. "Because, you take such good care of me and no one has ever done that before Nico." She looked at him. "I mean that. You've done everything. The kids, school, my work, even my ex-husband; all I had to worry about is me and Lindsay."

He gave her a funny look. "That's all you should have to worry about."

"You didn't have to do all that by yourself." She took his hand. "I would have called Ray. I probably should have."

Nico traced his thumb over her knuckles and shook his head. "Working this job I've given bad news to families before. I knew what to say. So, Ray knows enough to get his ass here. He knows that Lindsay was involved in a kidnapping and she is in the hospital." He caught Dani's eye. "I didn't tell him the rest. I didn't think that he should hear that over the phone."

She nodded. "Good, good…" She looked at her daughter and caught her lip between her teeth. "Oh god, how do you tell someone this? How the hell do I tell her father?" Her eyes moved back to Nico's face, they were a bit panicked now.

"You don't have to do it alone Dani. I'm here." He glanced to her arm. He noticed the bandage hadn't been changed and he frowned. He reached for her left arm and picked it up gently. "Dani, no one's checked your arm." His eyes were on hers and his fingers moved over the flesh at her wrist, below the bandage.

She shook her head. "I was worried about Lindsay and it's fine."

He made a disapproving sound in his throat and pointed out two spots where the bleeding had soaked through. "Not fine and when was your last tetanus shot?"

She thought and then closed one eye and thought some more.

"If you have to think that hard, it's been too long." He sighed and rubbed his forehead. "So, I know you're not leaving." He looked around the room and he smiled. Since Lindsay had a wound on her foot, they had left a tray of wound supplies on the counter. "Lucky for you, we can misappropriate some of Lindsay's supplies."

He stood and picked out what he wanted. Then he returned to his seat and had Dani turn her chair to face him. He pulled on a pair of gloves and carefully unwrapped the Kerlix that held Dani's gauze in place. "Shit, I was afraid of that." He frowned.

Dani looked at the cut for the first time. "Oh hell." She swallowed back a bit of nausea. "It's bigger than I thought it was." She reached for the gauze still on her arm and then realized what Nico meant; the material was stuck to the wound. "Ouch, that hurts."

"Don't pull Dani. It'll start to bleed again." He gently pushed her hand away. "Come here." He had her follow him to the small bathroom and turned on the water. He ran it warm and at a low flow rate. He looked at her. "It's going to sting, but it'll loosen it. You okay with that?"

She sighed. "Why the hell not." She stood between him and the sink so he could direct her arm under the water. She leaned back against him. "I already let you take a knife to my skin." She was a bit breathless as she looked up and caught his eyes.

He looked down at her and nodded. "Yes you did." As he pressed forward his hips cradled her ass. It was the little half step that forced her hips against the edge of the sink as he moved her arm under the water. His head moved lower so he could see and, conveniently, it put his mouth by her ear. "You were so quiet when I did that, what were you thinking?" He guided her arm under the water, soaking each piece of gauze.

Dani gasped. The water stung and his words sent a spark down her spine and then there was feeling of Nico's growing length pressing hot and heavy against her ass. She took a breath as he lifted her arm from the water. "I wasn't." She shook her head and watched as he pulled the soaked gauze piece by piece from the knife wound. "Oh god, only…feeling…"

He dropped the dirty gauze into the trash and then using the antibacterial soap from the wall. "This is probably going to hurt, more than just sting a bit." He lathered up the soap and massaged it over her arm gently.

Dani hissed and reached back, gripping Nico's shirt at his hip. "Shit…you weren't kidding." She pressed her head into his chest as he leaned over her.

"You know you said a lot less yesterday, when I had a sharp blade inside your skin." He whispered as he rinsed her arm, letting the water remove the soap and some of the now, freshly oozing blood.

She shivered, she wasn't sure why. "Adrenaline?"

He picked up the clean washcloth and patted Dani's arm and then moved them back to into Lindsay's room. He sat her down and picked up some bacitracin ointment. "Hold this so you don't bleed everywhere." He had her hold the wash cloth while he opened the packets of antibiotic salve. He watched her. "Adrenaline, huh?"

She nodded and then took the washcloth off when he told her to. She watched as he spread the antibiotic and then laid down a layer of nonstick Telfa, then regular gauze. Then he rolled cling gauze over the top to hold it in place. He secured it with a piece of tape. She held her arm up when he was finished. "Wow, that was quick and rather professional."

He smirked as he pulled of his gloves and tossed them in the small trash can beside the bed. "You learn enough doing this job." He put the extra supplies back and sat back down. He was tired. He checked the clock, it was almost ten. "I think we need to eat, would you like breakfast?"

Dani looked at the clock. "I can't believe it's that late." She looked at Lindsay. "I'm really worried about her Nico."

He smiled. "I know, but she's awake right now aren't you Lindsay?"

The girl groaned in the bed and raised her hand. "Sor…" She cleared her throat. "Sorta."

Dani jumped up and leaned over her. "Lindsay…are you okay? You in pain baby?" She looked at Nico. "How'd you know?"

Lindsay shifted and raised her head and groaned. "Oh, that hurts…headache." She touched her head and laid it back on the pillow. "Can my head go up?"

Dani showed her the bed controls and pushed her head up. She helped her get comfortable. "Better?"

She smiled weakly, "Yea." She looked at her foot. "So, what's the damage to the foot?" She looked at Dani and then Nico.

Dani looked to Nico.

He smiled. "They say two tendons were cut, but they were able to repair them. You're gonna need therapy, but you should be able to get mostly normal function back." He looked at Dani. "And to answer your question, she's been scratching her face for the past five minutes off and on."

Lindsay's eyes were closed again, but she opened them easily. "Any chance I could get a drink. I'm so thirsty."

Nico moved to the door. "I'm going to let the nurse know she's awake and see if I can get her some tea when I get us breakfast." He waited until Dani nodded. He smiled at Lindsay. "It's good to see you awake Lindsay."

"It's good to be awake." She looked around her and then sighed when she found his coat. She looked at Dani. "I kept dreaming…" her lip trembled and she pulled the coat closer. She glanced to Nico. "Only you didn't make it."

He frowned and caught Dani's eyes.

Dani bent over her daughter. "He did make it baby…Nico found you because your brother called us right away." She took Lindsay's hand. "And then, Nico made the police listen and coordinated the search of the school video. He found you because Ray Jay thought to have us ask Juliette about where they took her and I hypnotized her and Nico had his people track down the place based on what she was able to tell us." She pushed Lindsay's hair from her face and frowned at the bruise on her cheek and the small cuts. "Then Nico, Tommy and Ronnie got there, but it was because everyone worked together and Nico never gave up on you."

Lindsay gripped Dani's hand and nodded. She was crying again and she looked at the door, but Nico was gone. "He left."

Dani glanced up and smiled. "He did." She thought back to all the other times he'd done that. "He does that sometimes. He's going to get you some tea and tell the doctor or nurse you're awake."

"Where's Ray Jay and Juliette?"

"You're brother's at home and Juliette's back at rehab." She watched Lindsay start to protest. "Linds, Juliette needs structure to stay sober, this is not it and your brother was a zombie. He needed to crash. He'll be back soon. He has his own car."

Lindsay shifted in the bed and winced.

"Pain?"

She nodded and then looked up when the door opened.

"Nico, that was quick. Where's th…" Dani's voice trailed off at the look on serious look on his face.

He stood in the doorway, the door only half open and he was frowning. "Dani, Ray's here." He scanned Lindsay's face and saw the sudden change of expression on her face. He'd been worried about her reaction to Ray when he got here. "I found him in the main lobby."

Dani jumped up and then looked at Lindsay and pressed a hand to her mouth. Then she smoothed a hand over her hair and clothes. She was suddenly nervous. "Oh god, I don't know what to say to him." She looked down at her daughter. "Linds…" She started crying.

"Dani, he was already impatient. He's not going to wait long." He glanced over his shoulder. "What do you want to do?"

Lindsay looked panicked and she shook her head. "Don't leave me alone…" She looked from Nico to her mom and her cheeks were wet with tears again and she spread Nico's coat over her chest and pulled it up to her neck.

Dani nodded. "I need to talk to him honey, do you want me to do it in here?"

"No, no…no…Nico can stay with me…I don't want to see his face when he…when you…" She started sobbing.

Dani looked at Nico desperately, wringing her hands nervously. "Please?"

He nodded and entered the room. He grabbed Dani by the shoulders and squeezed quickly. "Dani, go talk to Ray, you need to tell him. It's his daughter." He pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I'm here if you need me." He sat on the bed beside Lindsay carefully. "Hey, it's okay Linds…I'm here and I'm not going anywhere until you say it's okay." He was sitting so he could lean against the head of her bed. He had one leg on the floor.

She looked up at him and nodded. She shifted and leaned against his shoulder. "Okay." Her voice wavered.

Dani glanced over her shoulder as she left the room. Her heart was in her throat at the sight of them together. The both looked so vulnerable. She pulled the door shut behind her and headed toward the nurses' desk. She saw Maria, Lindsay's nurse, and let her know she was awake and asked if she could have something to eat or drink. Maria said she could have something to drink and Dani asked for tea and then continued down the hall.

She found Ray sitting on a small couch in the waiting area.

"Dani." He bounced up frenetically. "What the hell is going on?"

She put a hand on his arm and guided him back to the couch. "Sit, please."

"I don't want to sit. Where is she? Is she okay? Why didn't you call sooner? What the hell is going on?" He ran a hand through his hair and then pulled at his tie. He was a mess. He looked like he hadn't slept.

Dani realized she probably looked the same way. She sighed and dropped onto the couch. She leaned on her elbows and started crying. "Oh god Ray, oh my god…our baby."

He stopped suddenly and frowned. "Dani, oh shit, what is it?" He knelt down in front of her so he could see her face. He took her hands. "Dani, please, she's okay…don't tell me she's not okay."

She lifted her head and shook it. "Her foot is cut, she tried to get away from the men that took her and cut it pretty bad, but they think she'll be okay with therapy." She nodded. "Physically, she'll heal up."

He exhaled. "Thank God, Dani I thought you were going to tell me she hadn't made it." He put his hand on his chest. "You were giving me a heart attack."

Dani touched his shoulder and then his cheek. He was smiling and she frowned at him. "God Ray, stop a minute. Three men kidnapped our baby…men Ray. They drugged her…they…stripped her…they…"

The smile left his eyes and then his face along with the color. Ray felt sick to his stomach. He shook his head. "No." He looked at his ex-wife and his fist landed on the hard plastic seat of the chair to his left. "No, don't tell me that…not Lindsay Dani."

She cupped his face. She was crying even though she wasn't sure where the tears kept coming from. "They hurt her Ray and they did things some, I'm not sure about, but the Hawks security team stopped them before they actually raped her." Her voice was low and quiet, barely a whisper as her forehead was pressed against his.

"Dani, she's so sweet, she doesn't…" He pulled back. "I want to kill him Dani. I want him dead." He looked around wild. "They caught him right?"

She nodded. "The man who hurt her the most was beaten almost to death."

He looked puzzled. "By who?"

Dani didn't know what to tell Ray. How much of her relationship to share with him. She took a breath. "The head security specialist of the Hawks is Nico Careles, he's the one who found Lindsay."

"Where were the police?" He stood and paced the five steps in the small area they were in. "Was this team related Dani? Was our daughter kidnapped because of something you were involved in?"

She snorted at him. "No, this was indirectly related to Ray Jay's arrest, but blaming him is not what needs to happen right now and the police were on their way too. If it weren't for Ray Jay calling us and letting us know his sister wasn't where she was supposed to be, and then Nico insisting that the police start doing something about it, we might not have found Lindsay before it was too late."

"You said 'us' and 'we' Dani?" Ray looked at her suspiciously. "Are you leaving something out of this Careles as head of security story? That all he is to you?"

She squinted at him. "We're divorced Ray. What he is to me doesn't matter to you."

"Ah, but he's more than a co-worker." He nodded. "My daughter was kidnapped and sexually assaulted and your boyfriend rescued her while her father was uselessly stuck in Colorado until this morning and I only got out because someone named Careles paid a ridiculously high price for a business class ticket for me." He glared. "Tell your new security specialist boyfriend that the least I can do after he rescued my daughter is pay him back. I don't need his charity."

Dani stared up at her ex stunned. She put her hands on her hips and glared. "What the hell is wrong with you? He saved Lindsay's life…he has been by my side all night and has gone above and beyond. He didn't have to call you. He didn't have to buy you that damn ticket Ray. He didn't have to help me, but he did and he's stayed by Lindsay's side all night because she's scared and he makes her feel safe."

"He what?" Ray's face turned red and his hands turned to fists. "It's my job to keep my daughter safe Dani. Mine. Not some stranger who barely knows her." He grabbed Dani by the shoulders and shook her. "He shouldn't even be allowed around her after what happened. How do you know he's not a pervert? How do you know he's not going to touch her?"

"Let go of me." Dani pulled away from Ray and stepped back. She rubbed her arms. "I'm letting that slide because…well because." She wiped her face. "Nico is the furthest thing from any of that. I'm sorry you weren't here Ray. You weren't even in the fucking state, so I'm not sure how, even if we were still married, you would have done any of that." She turned and walked up the hall. "If you want to see your daughter she's this way." She stopped and turned. She held up a finger like a school teacher. "So help me, you start something with Nico and you'll regret it."

"What are you gonna do? Rap my fingers with a ruler like Miss Pond in second grade?" He rolled his eyes.

She moved closer to him. "No, but your daughter is extremely sensitive right now and seriously, he pulled her from the brink of hell right before that piece of shit pulled her in." Dani started tearing up and she sniffed and wiped her eyes. "He stopped him right before it was too late." She looked Ray dead in the eye. "He's the reason she's the walking wounded and not the walking dead."


	21. Put Me Back Together

**_NOTE:_**Okay, so this was a little later than usual and that was mostly because I had several things over the weekend that got in my way. I had a personal obligation on Saturday and then my daughter is in band and there was a Band Spectacular on Sunday afternoon. She is also in Choir and Honor Choir which required my attendance last night at a concert. She also has the lead in the school musical and that requires her butt ferried back and forth to rehearsals. This has put a crimp in my writing time. Now, band and choir concerts are done, but rehearsals continue. I've also been running around doing Christmas shopping, so things have been a bit crazy for me. Usual stuff applies this week...no beta, typos and all that.**  
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Some of you may have read the little piece **Nico Does a Bad Bad Thing** and if you did and enjoyed it, or found it thought provoking, which was the intention, then thank you. If you have not read it, feel free, but be warned; it is darker than what you find here. It is not THIS NICO...well, it is but it is Nico of the past in a situation of the past. Heavy adult themes. Most people viewed it that way and if they had negative thoughts they left them constructively, or chose to not leave negative feedback. I'm fine with disagreeable words, but not personal attacks. Please, don't ever use personal attacks in any reviews on this site, not just on my stories.

LONG NOTE: Writing is personal enough as it is. It's hard to put what you write out there for people to read. If you feel something because of what you read that only means the writer did their job well. If you can see it, taste it, feel it-then the words have become more than words. The writer has painted a picture and set a scene. That is what writing is about. When that happens, when the words move from the page and become more than words and when those words invoke feeling, passion, disgust and possibly even hate, well then this is a good thing. I know that is why I read and that is the experience I want when I pick up a book.

I want to be transported to feel something else, to see and experience something that isn't here, to be someone else or to see what it was like for them. That is the entire reason for reading isn't it? Just because you didn't like the experience doesn't mean that the writer was wrong. It just means you didn't like the story, or the style. Okay, sometimes a book just sucks. I get it...and in some cases I couldn't agree more and if that was the case, bring it. I've said time and time again...if you have an issue with something about my story, the characterization, the pacing, some element, bring it up, show me, tell me and that way I can fix it. But don't just throw something at me because you were uncomfortable about it.

Don't tell me I need help and if you want to tell me that, have the balls to sign your review.

I wrote a story about 2 consenting adults, fiction...I didn't hurt people, I didn't threaten people. People who need help, there are plenty and as a Nurse Practitioner, I deal with them everyday. I help them and when I can't help them anymore, I try to find more help for them. There was a man in Connecticut...he needed help and didn't get it and now 20 kids are dead. Lets worry about the people who really need it. Psychiatric care in this country is horrible and we should be ashamed. (I'll step off my soap box now)

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**Put Me Back Together**

Lindsay was smiling at the story Nico was telling her about TK and Razor handcuffed to the goalpost all because of a lost playbook and some well deserved payback. She was almost feeling normal as she leaned against Nico's shoulder and listened to him. It really didn't matter what he said. She just wanted to hear him talk to her, his voice was soothing and the scent of the tea as she held it in her hands and felt the heat of it across her face reminded her of better times. She sighed.

"You should have seen their faces when I pulled the hoods off and they realized they were on the field." He leaned against her and added conspiratorially, "though, if you tell TK you know he'll be embarrassed and try to save face, so you might want to keep that between us." He caught her eye and winked.

She nodded. "Got it…" she swallowed a sip of tea and glanced at the door when it opened. Dani poked her head around the door. "Mom, where's…"

Ray pushed past Dani. "Lindsay." He stopped dead as soon as he entered the room and saw Nico sitting against his daughter. He turned to Dani and then glared at his daughter and his face went red. His hand rose. "What the fuck Danielle? Lindsay?" He took two steps toward the foot of the bed. "What the hell are you doing in my daughter's bed?" He looked at his ex-wife. "She's barely dressed Danielle, what the hell is wrong with you?"

Nico stayed where he was, only because Lindsay stiffened suddenly and wrapped both her arms around his right upper one. He leaned a bit closer to her. "Shh, it's okay Linds." He glanced at Dani. They needed to calm Ray down. Anger, high emotion wasn't good for Lindsay right now. She didn't respond well to it. "Ray, please calm down. I'm not hurting her and trust me I only want the best for your daughter and I'm here because she wants me here."

He looked at his daughter and then he looked away with a snort. "She doesn't know what she wants or what is good for her. She's a damn kid." He turned to look at Dani. "I can't believe this Dani…this is what you let happen? This…" He continued yelling, his hands flying through the air as he turned to Dani. "This is what happens when you work with people like him…and that Terrence King. God, what the hell are you letting these kids do Dani?"

Lindsay saw the look on his face and she felt ashamed. Tears ran down her face and she looked to her mother as she pressed her face against Nico's chest.

He automatically pulled her closer and pressed kisses to the top of her head as he gently rubbed her back to ease her. He whispered in her hair and glared at Ray.

Lindsay started rocking and crying. "Oh god…this is all my fault." She lifted her head. "Stop it!" She screamed and put her hands over her ears.

Startled, Ray stopped in the middle of a rant and looked at his daughter finally. He actually looked at her. He saw her face, her pain, her hurt, her confusion and her saw clinging to the man beside her. Why was she doing that? Why was she crying and why the hell was he screaming at everyone?

"Oh fuck me…" He was an idiot and he knew it. He was so angry and he couldn't be angry at the right people, so he was being angry at the wrong ones. He stood there and thought about what his daughter had been through. "I'm so sorry Lindsay…sorry you were hurt…" he shook his head and wiped his eyes when he realized he was crying. "Oh god, you're my baby and they should never have touched you." He bit out the last words. "Fucking trash." His eyes were filled with hate at the men who touched her. He looked at Nico. "Thank you for hurting him and helping her." He stepped toward the empty side of the bed. "Oh baby, I'm sorry…I'm just so angry for them hurting you. I'm not angry at you…I love you."

Lindsay sobbed and then she let go of Nico and launched herself at her father. "Daddy…" She turned her head against his chest and cried. "Don't hate me. I'm sorry they did it. I fought him. I didn't want him to touch me. I hurt him…please don't be ashamed of me."

He was confused and he stroked her hair as he looked to Dani for guidance. He saw Careles move to her and pull her into his arms and he looked away. He took a breath. "I'm not ashamed of you Linds. Why would I be? I love you, always." He wrapped his arms around her and tucked her head against his shoulder.

Lindsay nodded and snuggled against him. She pressed her head under his chin and breathed in. Nausea immediately swept over her and panic overwhelmed her. The world went black around her and she tried to push it away. She took another breath and it was stronger now…the scent of HIM. She closed her eyes and shook her head. "No nononono, no, no…" She pushed away. Now the scents of metal and grease joined the others and when she pushed he pulled and his voice was there too. "Get off me. Get off me. No, not again. No…" She started getting more violent as he fought back. "He'll come for me." Her eyes were open now, but she only saw dark and Lewis and that smell; HIS smell.

"Hey, what's wrong? Where are you going? What's going on? Lindsay, what the hell?" Ray fought with his daughter as she was suddenly wild against him and she was scratching and punching at him. "Dani, what the hell is she doing?" He grabbed her arms and pressed them down to her side as he pushed her to the bed.

Dani grabbed Ray's arm. "Let go of her."

He shook his head. "Dani, I can't. She's going to hurt herself." She was still fighting him and she thrashed and her bad foot hit the side rail and she grunted in pain. "See." He was trying to hold her down even harder now and all it did was make her fight harder.

Nico grabbed Ray and physically pulled him off Lindsay. "Let go." He knew something had physically triggered her reaction. "She's responding to you. Let go, she'll calm down." He dragged Ray to the corner of the room and shoved him into a chair. "Sit the fuck down and stay there." He returned to the bed and picked up his coat from the floor.

"Like you know anything…overpaid security guard." He glared, but he didn't move because his daughter was calming down and he cursed because she was repeating that overpaid security guard's name over and over.

Lindsay started sobbing and turned her head away, toward the wall. She'd let him do it…wait for Nico, it worked last time. She went limp and fought the nausea down. She nodded her head up and down. "Nico will come…Nico will come…Nico will come…"

Dani was whispering to her daughter, tears on her face trying to get her to respond and all she would do is repeat the same thing over and over and then Nico tucked his coat over her shoulders and turned her head toward it.

"Hey Linds, you and me need to tease TK about that playbook, remember?" He tucked her hair behind her ear. "We can't let him think he can get away with that shit, now can we?"

She shook her head slowly and pressed her face into the coat. She inhaled and then sobbed. She blinked and then looked around the room in a panic before hugging the coat to her chest. She wiped her eyes with the back of a hand. "Oh god…he was here. I could smell him and hear him." She looked at Dani and then Nico and then she looked around the room. "Where's dad?"

Ray stood up. "I'm over here." He moved toward the bed. "What the hell happened, Linds?"

She shook her head and buried her nose against Nico's coat. "I don't know." She shrugged. "I know I was hugging you and then I had the overwhelming feeling he was here. Like on top of me. I could smell him and then, it was like he was here and I was there." She bit her lip and swallowed back the fear. She reached for Dani's hand. "Mom, it was so real."

Dani looked to Nico. "Oh baby, it was a flashback and they do feel real." She squeezed her hand and then kissed her daughter's hair. "I'm sorry you experienced that."

Nico glanced to Ray. "Something triggered it. She's been sensitive to scents…I know it was the biggest thing for me after the service." He closed his eyes. "There's still a scent I can't get out of my head." He opened his eyes. "Are you wearing a new cologne or aftershave…anything?"

He frowned. "Carla got me a new aftershave, I think that's what she packed for me, so it's probably what I used this morning." He looked down at his daughter and felt even more helpless than before. Then he looked at Nico. "Are you sure?"

He shook his head. "No but," he looked to Lindsay, "Linds, will you let your dad get closer and see if it's how he smells? If it's his aftershave it would be his face and neck where it's strongest."

She swallowed and looked at Nico. "I…I don't know if I can." She shook her head. "I don't want to go through that again."

He took her hand. "You won't have to. I'm here, your mom's here and, of course" he held up the hem of his coat, "my coat is on standby." He winked.

She looked at Dani and then her dad. "Okay." She leaned forward and waited.

Ray didn't hesitate he walked toward the bed and bent down to hug his daughter and he pulled her into his arms. "God Lindsay I love you baby." His voice cracked and he pulled her tight and kissed her temple.

Lindsay didn't hug him, she was afraid. She didn't really breathe at first. She just sat there, slightly panicked. Then she took a shallow breath through her nose by his cheek and it was there. She pulled back with a gasp. "It's him…it's him…" She shoved at Ray's shoulder.

Ray was confused again at first and he didn't immediately let go.

Dani stood behind him and pulled at his shoulder. "Dammit Ray, let go of her."

He realized it was happening again and let go with a sigh and stepped back to watch his daughter snuggle into another man's coat and it was making him angry. He ground his teeth together. "All I really want to do is comfort my daughter and I can't." His voice was petulant.

Dani glared at him. "You can Ray, just go shower and put on some clean clothes. Don't use any of that aftershave. Toss it in the trash. Use your old stuff."

He rolled his eyes. "The stuff you used to buy me? Why do you think Carla bought me a new brand?"

"Oh for fucksake, get over it. This is about your daughter." She crossed her arms and hissed under her breath. "Go home, shower, don't wear any. I don't care, but come back when you aren't wearing any of whatever is, eau de rapist these days." She glared at him.

He opened his mouth to say something when there was a knock on the door.

Lindsay sat up. "Thank god…" She smiled when Nico, who was in the chair beside her, hid his laugh behind a cough. "This is why they're divorced. I see it now." She looked at her parents who were glaring at each other and then she glanced to the door. "Come in."

The door opened and Ben Carson and a female detective walked in. He nodded to Nico. "I'm sorry to interrupt, but the nurse said that Miss Santino was awake." He turned to Dani and motioned to his partner. "This is Detective Sheila Roberts, she'll be working with me on this case. She was at the scene yesterday, but I don't think you met her."

Dani shook her head. "It was overwhelming."

Shelia nodded. "Yea, it was. I was in on picking up the Harper boys mostly." She looked at Ray. "Are you Lindsay's father?"

Ray nodded and crossed his arms over his chest. "Yes and I'm wondering why no one called me."

Ben glanced to Nico and narrowed his eyes. "We did Mr. Santino, you should probably check with your girlfriend," he glanced at a notepad, "Miss Carla Rossini. We spoke with her several times and she told us you were in Colorado on business and that she would contact you."

Sheila added. "She was supposed to get back with us with your hotel name and number, but she never did." She motioned to Nico. "Mr. Careles tracked you down for us and by that time, he'd already arranged for your flight home. You should thank him. I'm not sure how he did that. That plane was the only one that left the airport. It's been closed again."

Dani narrowed her eyes at him.

Nico shrugged. "Ex-navy pilot, owed me a favor." He cleared his throat. "Okay, well I'm sure you aren't here to discuss my ninja like travel agency skills."

Ben bit back his laugh. "Um no, but we need to ask Lindsay a couple questions." He looked to Dani and then Ray. "Will that be okay?"

Dani nodded.

Ray stepped forward. "What kind of questions? Does she need a lawyer?"

Nico rolled his eyes.

Dani spoke up. "Raymond, she's not under arrest. They need information about what happened to prosecute." She glared at him.

He looked deflated. "Oh, then I guess it's okay." He crossed his arms. "Maybe I should go shower and then come back Dani."

She nodded at him. "We'll be here for a couple days. I think they're moving her to the rehab floor tomorrow."

"Okay. I'll call you later then." He looked at his daughter. "Lindsay. I'll be back after I take a shower sweetheart."

She nodded. "Okay dad." She smiled. "I'm sorry and I do love you."

"I know pumpkin. I'm not mad at you." He rubbed a hand over his jaw. "You want anything? Some of those caramels from that shop you like?"

Her face brightened and she nodded. "Yea, the dark chocolate ones with the white chocolate swirls on top. I'd like that a lot daddy."

He smiled, happy he thought of it. "Good, I'll get them."

"I'll be here later. Maybe you can go home for the night then and I'll stay with her so you can sleep?"

"That's thoughtful Ray, but let's see how she does first." She raised her brow. "Make sure she doesn't freak out first, okay?" She reached out and squeezed his hand. "Hey, thanks for thinking of the candy Ray, that's the first real smile all day."

He smiled and wiped his hand over his face. "God this is all fucked up, but thanks Dani. I appreciate it and we'll wait to figure out what to do about tonight, okay? I get it." He looked at his daughter and raised his hand. "Be back in a bit baby."

Lindsay waved and then Ray was gone.

Detective Roberts stepped toward Lindsay's bed. "Miss Santino are you feeling any better?" She smiled down at her.

Lindsay shrugged. "I'm okay." She looked at Dani and pulled Nico's coat back around her. "Better than I was."

"Good, that's good. I have a couple questions. Just a few things to clear up." She glanced at Nico. "Can you tell us who was driving the vehicle at the school or who grabbed you?"

Lindsay gasped and shook her head. Her brows drew together in thought. "When I woke up I struggled to remember that. His name is Ken and he dated Libby for a while. I don't remember his last name." She looked at her mom. "He was mean to her and she broke up with him, remember we talked about him because he hit her?"

Dani nodded. She did remember that conversation because it had opened up a good dialogue with both Lindsay and Ray Jay about abusive behavior and teens.

Ben cleared his throat. "Does he go to school with you? In your grade?"

Lindsay shook her head. "No, he's over at Saint Francis Prep and he's a senior."

Ben motioned Nico toward the door and then spoke quietly just outside it. "Did you tell Lindsay about the videos?"

Nico leaned against the wall and sighed deeply as he crossed his arms. "No and honestly we didn't even talk to Ray about it." He looked at the detective. "I assume there's a reason you're asking me this."

The detective nodded at him. "I think this Ken is in the videos."

"Shit." He looked into the room. He didn't want to know, but he probably needed to know. "Do I want to know what's on it?"

Ben sighed. "I doubt it." He rubbed his jaw. "It's him and Tyler on the video. Looks like it was for a private buyer, personal order so pretty specific on what he asked for."

"You're being vague."

"Nic, let it go. You're too close to this, trust me." He looked Nico in the eyes. "When I said I doubt it, I meant no." He shoved his hands in the pockets of his slacks. "Look, I'm pretty damn sure there was video of the Pittman girl wasn't there?"

Nico's eyebrows rose, but he didn't answer.

"Yea, which is why you were involved with the Harper case before…this AJ guy, he was tracking down her video for you before the FBI got it. I know you Careles. I know how you work. Black ops even on this side of things, it's okay, I'm not gonna tell anyone. I mean who's gonna believe me anyway. There's not a trace of it or you in the system is there?" He paused. "But, my question to you is, did you see her video?"

Nico gave him a steady glare and again he didn't answer.

"You didn't because I know you. You wouldn't, couldn't. You won't because you love her and this girl…" he nodded toward the room, "you love her mother so there's no way you're going to watch that video and me telling you what's on it that's almost just as bad. So, listen to me when I say it's bad and that's all you need to know."

He sighed and nodded. "So, what do I tell her mother?" His head fell forward with a sigh. He was tired.

The detective shrugged. "What I just told you. That you don't know, that we won't let you see it, that you'd rather not watch it, some combination of those? Take your pick, any of them are true, but it might help if we asked Lindsay specifics about things. We might be able to get her to remember something."

Nico's head shot up. "She's unstable right now Ben."

"I know, but the memories are freshest. You know how things work."

He pressed his eyes shut. "Shit, shit…I don't think it's a good idea and you'll need Dani's permission."

Ben nodded. "I know."

He opened his eyes. "She won't agree to it. Not right now anyway."

"You sure?"

"You can ask, but yea, I'm pretty sure." Damn, he was tired.

He nodded and turned back to the room. Nico stood there for a second and then moved toward the small vending area. He checked the clock and groaned when it read eleven. He needed coffee. He was fumbling in his pockets when a heavy hand landed on his shoulder.

"That stuff tastes like liquid shit boss." A ceramic travel mug was suddenly thrust under his nose. "Good thing I brought an extra from home don't ya think?"

"Xeno, you are a fucking life saver right now." Nico smiled and turned to face the larger man.

"Figured you and Dr. D might need a little caffeine and carbs." He held up a plain brown bag and a matching mug. "Well, maybe I should say Ronnie figured you might, that and I was supposed to tell you to take a nap."

Nico sipped his coffee and then snorted. "Of course she did." He took the bag from Xeno and nodded back down the hall. "Thanks though…you made this?" He held up the coffee and when Xeno nodded he raised his eyebrow. "It's really good."

"French press is the only way to make it. I don't use a drip machine, takes a little longer, but it's worth it." The big man shrugged.

Nico chuckled, who would have thought.

They entered Lindsay's room and Nico immediately saw that Dani was on the defensive. Ben had obviously brought up discussing things privately with Lindsay.

"Dani, Xeno brought you some coffee and it looks like some bagels." He said, pretending he had no idea what was being discussed.

She glared at him and then stomped toward him. When she was right in front of him she hissed. "Why would you think that's a good idea?"

Nico gently took her arm. He glanced to Xeno. "Why don't you say hi to Lindsay and the detectives Xeno. See if she would like a bagel. The nurse says she can eat if she feels up to it. I'm gonna talk to Dani for a few minutes."

Xeno winked and moved to the bed.

He pulled Dani to the doorway, where a few minutes ago he'd had a discussion with Ben. "Dani, I told him I didn't think it was a good idea and that you would say no."

She opened her mouth and then shut it. "Oh…" she looked confused, "He said you it was a good idea."

Nico ground his teeth together. "Of course he did." He sipped his coffee because it helped to settle him. "Classic divide and conquer. He lied to you Dani. I think Lindsay's too fragile right now and I definitely don't think it's a good idea for them to go delving anything like that with her right now. I think she needs to rest and relax. She may never get close to remembering."

Dani leaned against him suddenly relieved. She pressed her head into his chest. "Oh god I thought I was going to have to fight this battle on my own." She was thankful when his arm went around her. She looked up at him. "I don't think it's a good idea for her to know, not right now. She needs time Nico." She hated that there were tears again.

He kissed her hair. "She does Dani and I told him that and let's go back and tell him together."

She nodded and they headed back into the room.

Dani moved quickly back to Lindsay's bedside and she noticed that Xeno had pretty much insinuated himself between the bed and the detectives. He stood there with his arms crossed facing them acting as a wall without looking like he was trying to. She smiled and shot Nico an appreciative look. "Detective Carson, I think my daughter would like to rest for a bit. Why don't you come back tomorrow?"

Ben looked at Dani and then to Nico.

Nico moved to the opposite side of the bed and faced off against the man. "I think that's a good idea Ben. We can talk about this later."

Ben looked at his partner and sighed. "I think that you should…"

Xeno took a step forward. "Detective, you heard Dr. Santino and I think Nico was pretty straight forward too." He took another step forward. "Miss Santino needs her rest, she's been through a lot." He stopped his forward progress, but only because another step would put him in physical contract with the female detective.

Sheila looked to Ben and then she gave a resigned sigh. "Okay, we'll check back in tomorrow and see if she remembers anything new. If you do think of anything, you have our number."

Dani nodded. She didn't, but she figured Nico did. "Yes, we'll contact you right away if Lindsay remembers anything."

She nodded and then left the room.

Ben glanced to Nico and then shook his head. He nodded to Dani and then Lindsay and with a curt nod to Xeno, he was gone as well.

Xeno smiled and turned back to Lindsay, Nico and Dani. "I like it when people get Xenophobic." He winked at Lindsay.

Dani snorted and shook her head.

Lindsay giggled. "He keeps using that word…I do not think it means what he thinks it means."

"It's incon-thsee-vable…" Nico added.

Lindsay started giggling again while Dani and Xeno stared at the two of them like they were crazy.

Nico shook his head and looked at Dani as if she was missing something obvious. "Princess Bride…really?"

Dani shook her head. "Sorry, no idea what the two of you are laughing about."

"Oh, the three of us are going to watch it one night soon." He picked up the second coffee cup from the table and handed it to Dani. "Here, don't let Xeno's coffee go to waste and you need it."

She took the cup and sipped. Her eyes went wide as she looked at the large man. "You made this?"

He blushed and nodded. "Yes ma'am."

"It's almost better than Nico's." She smiled at him and squeezed his forearm. "Thank you."

He ducked his head. "No problem, brought bagels too and I just wanted to make sure things were okay and I'm gonna go sit outside now boss. If you need me that's where I'll be."

Nico raise an eyebrow, but nodded. He wondered what Xeno was getting at, but he knew Ronnie had asked him to come over. He also knew he wouldn't leave the hospital without a security presence. He figured Ronnie knew that too. He was tired and he needed to sleep, even if it was just for a few hours. Knowing Xeno was here would make it easier for him to leave.

He sighed and sat in the recliner Dani had been in last night. He tried to get comfortable in it, but it wasn't much better than the chair he'd been up in all night. He set his coffee on the small window sill and closed his eyes.

He didn't think he'd had his eyes shut more than two minutes when the nurse disturbed him.

"Excuse me, can I ask you to step into the hall so I can examine my patient?"

He sat up and stretched with a nod. "Of course." He smiled at Lindsay and then moved to the hall. He found Xeno in the small waiting area reading a three year old copy of Sports Illustrated. He tapped the cover, emblazoned with a smiling, sweating TK. "I remember all the damn work that article caused me." He dropped down next to his friend. "I would have made Terrence disappear if I could have back then." His head rested on the wall behind him and he closed his eyes again. "What time is it?"

"Twelve twenty boss, you should go take a shower and I mean that in the nicest way possible."

Nico chuckled and rolled his head toward the large man. "Are you saying I smell?"

"Not at all, I'm saying you reek, like an over-ripe garlic bulb in my grandmother's pantry." He looked at his boss. "Go shower, I'll watch over them, whaddya think I'm here for anyway?"

"I'll talk to Dani. Make sure she's okay with it."

_Later…_

Dani practically had to force Nico out the door. She told him he could use her house, but he told her he wanted to check on Onyx. He'd called a cab and reluctantly he left. She felt better knowing Xeno was just outside their door even though the people responsible were in police custody.

Lindsay was napping now, but she had hobbled to the bathroom with help. She was weak, but she was getting up and it made Dani feel hopeful. Dani looked up from her magazine around two thirty in the afternoon to see Ronnie and Ray Jay at the door. She was surprised at the tears in her eyes at the sight of her son.

She stood and pulled him into her arms. "Ray Jay." She hugged him and kissed him and then didn't let him go for a long few seconds.

"Mom…it's okay." He pulled back and wiped his damp eyes. "You good? Linds okay?"

She nodded. "Yea, we're doing okay and she's getting on good." She smiled at him. "You?"

He shrugged. "I'm okay…I guess." He glanced at his sister. "She want to see me?"

"Why don't you go say hi and find out." She slapped his ass and shoved him forward. "I think she'd be happy to see you actually." She smiled encouragingly.

He looked at the floor uncertainly and then nodded and moved toward the bed with a sigh.

Ronnie smiled and held up a small bag. "I hope you don't mind, but I asked Ray Jay if I could grab you some clean clothes and some stuff from your bathroom. I thought you might want to shower and change. I didn't figure you'd leave."

Dani didn't hesitate to wrap her arms around the taller woman. "I don't mind. You're a lifesaver and I don't know what I'd do without you and Nico and even Xeno…all of you are so much more than just a bunch of security people. Are you guys always like this?" She hugged the other woman tight.

Ronnie hugged her back. "When you do this job long enough you learn a few things. People get hurt and you know what it's like to sit in a hospital waiting for days. You wish people would bring you clothes and coffee. You wish people would ask if you need a break. So, if you care, you do it. I care about the boss, we all do…we're like a family and he cares about you so we're gonna care about you too." She pulled back and looked at Dani. "It's the way it is." She shrugged and then turned to look at Lindsay and Ray Jay.

Ray Jay was standing beside Lindsay's bed and he was watching her sleep. He wasn't touching her and he didn't say anything to her. He wasn't sure what to say. He felt like this was his fault. He wanted to leave and he wouldn't be here if it weren't for Ronnie. She'd shown up at the door and told him to get ready. She hadn't taken no for an answer and then she took him out for lunch.

He'd sat across from her in the diner and watched her and after she ordered them both BLTs she'd sat back in the booth and asked him how he felt.

"_Like I want to throw up." He looked over at the bodyguard and then out the window. He wanted to go back home and crawl back into his bed. He wanted to pretend none of this happened, that his sister was still sleeping and that she just hadn't woken up yet. "I feel like this is just a bad dream and I'll wake up soon."_

_Ronnie shook her head at him. "I know kid, but it's not. Your sister's at the hospital and she'll want to see you. To know you're okay and that you still love her. She'll need to know that you don't think she's dirty or wrong." She leveled her gaze at Ray Jay. "She feels that way. She feels used, dirty and like she did something wrong. Up here," she pointed to her head, "she knows it's wrong to feel that way, but it doesn't keep her from feeling it and I know you feel like it's your fault, but she doesn't." She cocked her head to the side. "Not yet anyway…she might be pissed at you at some point, but right now she'll be happy to see you .She has a lot to process and she needs her family and the familiar."_

_He stared at her. "Are you sure?"_

_She nodded at him. "Just be there kid. Just be her big brother, her hero and when she gets pissed at you and blames you; then you tell her how sorry you are and mean it. Right now, be strong." She looked up and smiled when the waitress set their plates down. "Since the food is here, now we eat." _

That had been it, so here he was standing beside his sister's bed trying to figure out how to be here for her when he kept thinking he might need someone to be there for him. He was about to walk back into the hall when she whimpered and grimaced in her sleep.

Ray Jay immediately brushed the hair off her forehead. "Shh Linds…it's cool." He remembered how she'd clung onto Nico's coat, so he pulled it from where it was by the side rail and draped it over her shoulder. She grabbed his hand.

"Nico? Mom?" Her eyes opened and she smiled when she saw her brother. She leaned up and wrapped her arms around him. "Ray Jay you're here. I wasn't sure if you were a dream or not last night either." She hugged him and cried into his shoulder. "Mom said you called Nico when I wasn't at Libby's. You knew something was wrong…you thought to ask Juliette…they found me because of you Ray Jay. Thank you…thank you…thank you." She pulled back and looked at him when he wasn't hugging her. "What's wrong?"

He stared at her, still not sure what to do. He still felt horrible. "Linds, I'm just so sorry…I wish none of this happened." He turned his face away because he didn't want her to see his tears.

She put a hand on his shoulder and pulled him down to sit beside her. "Remember when you'd let me watch scary movies even after mom told you not to and I'd have bad dreams? You remember what you used to do?" She waited for him to smile and nod.

He remembered and sank into the bed beside her and slid his arm around her. "Yea," he looked over to where their mother was watching them. He saw tears in her eyes. He pulled his sister against his chest and then the coat over her. "I would let you crawl into my bed and hold you like this. And make you promise not to tell mom."

She nodded. "I'd blackmail you with those movies. Half the time I just wanted to sleep in your room. It was way cooler with all the Star Wars stuff. All I had was Barbie and princess stuff. Like I said, most of the time I wasn't even scared and there was no way I wasn't going to tell mom you let me watch _Night of the Living Dead _or _Friday the 13__th__. _Are you kidding me, she would have killed me and you and we never would have been able to have cable anymore. And besides, in bed was the only time you ever let me play with the light saber."

He snorted. "Because I thought it would keep you quiet." He gave her a funny look. "You said most of the time, so part of the time you were scared?"

She nodded against his chest. "Yes, sometimes I did have bad dreams and I could have gone to mom and dad's room, but I liked your room. You kept the bad guys away. You were my big brother and like I said you had that cool light saber." She poked his side.

He hugged her. "You know, I think I still have that in the closet." He sat there. "I'm sorry Linds. I'm so sorry that you got hurt and I couldn't keep the bad guys away."

"You still managed to get the good guys there in time." She pulled the coat up. "Nico got there because you had the right idea. It could have been worse…I had the bad dream, but I got to wake up from it. I'm not stuck in the middle of it." She wiped her tears. "It sucks, but it could be worse."

Ray Jay closed his eyes. He didn't want to think about it. He looked over at his mother and he saw the pain on her face, her hand pressed to her lips, but he she was smiling at him…at them.

"Ray Jay…Lindsay…" Then Dani was suddenly beside the bed and then she was hugging her kids. There wasn't anything else in the world she wanted to do at that moment. "I love you both so much."

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR 

Nico rolled over and tucked a down pillow under his arm as he curled onto his side. He opened one eye and looked at the simple clock on the nightstand. It was five and he'd slept four hours. He yawned and stretched. He felt much better and he wasn't surprised when claws dug into his side as Onyx climbed over him and settled in front of him. The cat's tail was up and he turned in a circle and then settled down in a ball on top of the down pillow purring.

He smiled and scratched the cat before rolling onto his back and tucking an arm under his head. He sighed heavily and closed his eyes again as he rubbed the cat behind his ears. "Is it good to have me home?" The cat purred, but otherwise ignored him. "Well, it's good to be here, but I need to get moving buddy." He stroked the cat and let his tail pull through his fingers. He repeated the stroke a few more times. "Dani needs me more than you right now." He opened one eye and raised an eyebrow at his friend. "You're an ornery survivor. I'll open you some tuna before I leave, the good kind, I promise."

He picked the cat from the pillow and nuzzled him against his cheek and then set him down. Onyx purred loudly and stretched, arched his back and gave his owner a serious look as Nico sat up.

Nico got up from his bed and moved to his closet. He'd showered and shaved before he'd climbed into bed, so he didn't bother doing either again. He pulled a pair of dark jeans on and then he chose a dark t-shirt and pulled a simple sweater over that. He slid a belt through his belt loops as he left the closet. Ten minutes later he ready to leave. He had his keys, wallet, money clip and phone. Before he left he dialed his phone.

"AJ, tell me what you know." He stared out the window in his living room with one hand in his pocket. He hoped for good news, but he figured there wasn't going to be much.

There was a pause on the other end of the line. "I've shut a bunch of sites down and I'm working on more. I haven't found the original buyer yet boss. He's smart. Probably a hacker, but if he's not then he at least knows computers. I've watched the video and my advice if you haven't is; don't. I think he was directing it from off screen, maybe from the phone. I don't think he was there in person, but he was calling the shots."

"I haven't watched and got the same advice from the cops." He surveyed the skyline. It wasn't dark yet, it never seemed to get dark in the city. "I didn't watch Juliette's, I couldn't and I don't think I want to see this one either. It's just that I want to know how bad they hurt her." He closed his eyes. "She was innocent AJ…it wasn't like with Juliette. I mean she was far from a good girl when she got involved with these assholes. She'd probably done everything they did to her and then some. I'm not saying it's good, or right, but it makes a difference." He opened his eyes and watched the street. He saw taxis and buses and people go about their lives. Normal lives and normal people and nothing unusual, but the people he cared about were hurting and he couldn't stop it.

"I know boss, but you seeing it won't make it better." He said something muffled and laughed. "Hang on a sec." There was more laughing and muffled talking and then he was back. "Alley just wanted to show me a picture she took of her sisters. Thanks for this by the way…this vacation, the girls are loving it and so is Mary. I know I'm working, but I'd rather be doing this on the beach than in a dark basement. It doesn't feel as dirty."

Nico felt horrible. He'd sent AJ there because of what he'd had to do to help with Juliette and now he was up to his eyeballs in it again. "I'm sorry about all this AJ. I know you hate dealing with shit like this, but you're the best I know." He pulled his hand from his pocket and shoved it through his hair. "I wish I didn't have to ask you."

"Boss, if I were in your position I'd ask me too. I'd want the best I knew on this and I'm the best I know." He laughed. "I'm not being cocky about that. If I don't know the answer, I can find the guy, or girl who does and I want this scum off the street. I don't want to have to worry about it for my family."

"Why don't you take another week AJ. I'll take care of rearranging the flights, expense is all mine of course. I can't promise any change in the work, but you can enjoy yourselves for another week?"

There was a pause on the other end of the line. "Really? I mean I'd have to check with Mary and call the schools, but the girls have been doing their work online and are caught up, so I doubt it would be an issue, but I appreciate it. This past week has been great and we were saying it would be great if we could stay longer. Let me run it by everyone and I'll get back with you, but I'm sure we'll be cool with it."

Nico smiled. "Good. I just want you to know how much I appreciate all the work you're doing on this. I know it's hard on you. I can't imagine what it's like having girls and then seeing all that…" He stopped because he couldn't go on. He had seen what Lewis had been doing to Lindsay and it had been enough. Really, he could imagine. It was killing him.

"They aren't mine Nico. I thank god every night that they aren't mine. I feel guilty sometimes that mine are safe and sound and some other little girl was hurt or is being hurt, but that's why I keep doing this. That's why I watch the damn videos over and over. They make me sick, but I watch so I can find something that might help. Like I did so we could find Dr. Dani's girl. If I can help stop one guy or save one girl then I made a difference."

Nico nodded. "It makes sense when you put it that way and thanks for doing it. You let me know about another week and I'll make it happen. Tell Mary thank you and hug your girls tight AJ."

"Every damn night boss…every damn night." He hung up.

Nico dropped his hand to his side and turned from the window. It was time to head back to the hospital, but he was going to pick up some real food for everyone first. He scrolled through his contacts and hit send when he found the one he wanted. He picked up a shorter version of the wool coat he'd left with Lindsay on the way out the door and placed a to-go order as he headed down the hall. It would be ready by the time he got there.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR 

Lindsay was shoving her hospital food around her plate. It just wasn't appetizing and she really didn't have much of an appetite. She sighed and pushed her pudding cup to Ray Jay. "It's butterscotch, you want it?"

He frowned at her. "Really? It's like the only edible thing there and you're not eating it?" He picked up the cup and peeled the foil from the top. He licked it off and then pulled the spoon from her tray. "Those potatoes look worse than the school cafeteria's."

Her nose wrinkled. "They are." She glanced toward the bathroom where their mother just exited. She'd showered and had dried her hair with the small hair dryer attached to the wall in the bathroom.

Dani was clean, her clothes were clean and she looked better, but she had no makeup on. She paused as she pulled her hair up in a ponytail. "What's wrong with the food Linds?"

"It's nasty." She pouted. "You feel better?"

Dani smiled and nodded and then sat on the edge of her daughter's bed. "I'm fine, but the shower felt great and I don't smell now." She winked. "Maybe there's something in the café downstairs worth eating? I'll go check, or maybe Ray Jay can run out and get us something?"

"Or maybe, Nico can deliver?" Nico added from the doorway holding up three large plastic bags.

Ray Jay was up like a bullet and pulling the bags from his hands. "I smell Chinese." He smiled as he returned to Lindsay's bedside and set the bags down. He was pulling take out containers from the bags and setting them down even as his mother cleared Lindsay's tray from the small table. "Oh hells yea, you are a lifesaver. I was wasting away in here."

Nico rolled his eyes.

Dani smiled and set the tray on the small counter by the door. She smiled up at the man who was still standing there. "Thank you." She slid her arms around him. "We were just discussing our food options, but you must have psychic powers." She stood on her tiptoes and pulled his head down for a kiss.

He didn't resist. His arms went around her easily as he bent his head. "No, I just figured you would be hungry." He brushed her lips lightly and looked over at the kids. "Hospital food is never a good thing." He smiled and kissed her again. This time his lips lingered, but he didn't deepen it. He pulled back with a small sigh. "I miss you." He said quietly.

Dani shivered at his loaded words and she looked up at him from under her lashes. "I miss you too." She let her head rest against his chest and stayed there for a few seconds while he held her. "Did you eat yet?" She asked watching the kids open the containers to check what was in them.

"No, I was planning on eating with you." He pulled back and moved toward the bed. He smiled at Lindsay and then bent to kiss her forehead. "How are you feeling?"

She smiled and shrugged. "My foot hurts. I won't take anything stronger than the ibuprofen so it really hurts and I keep seeing stuff I don't want to see when I close my eyes." She looked away for a second and then back at Nico. "I guess I'm okay. Mom says all that's normal. I'm angry and sad and I don't really know how I should feel."

"I wish I could tell you how to feel Linds, but I don't know either." He took her hand and squeezed. "I'm used to fixing things and I don't know how to fix this."

She looked up at him, her lip quivered until she caught it between her teeth. She looked at Ray Jay and then her mother who slid under Nico's arm. Lindsay thought she looked like she belonged there beside this man. He was good for her mother. She thought he was good for Ray Jay too. Hell, he'd been good for her. Without Nico, she wouldn't be sitting where she was right now. She took a shaky breath and tried to stop the tears. "You already started fixing it. You stopped them Nico and you're helping mom and Ray Jay…all of you…" she looked at them again, "…you're all helping put me back together."

Dani pressed into Nico's side with a small sob. Her daughter was so strong. So much stronger than she ever thought possible and she was so proud of her. "I love you Linds…"

Ray stood at the door and watched. He held a box of chocolates in his hand and wondered how he was going to compete with the man who saved his daughter's life.


	22. The Darkest Nights

_**NOTE:** _Chapter is up...not bad. Hope everyone who celebrates has a Merry Christmas and everyone has a Happy New Year. Hopefully there will be a new chapter by then, but hey, holidays so you never know.

Same stuff...beta-less so typos exist. Hope you enjoy despite this. Have fun and stay safe!

* * *

**The Darkest Nights**

Ray took a few steps back down the hall. He pasted a smile on his face and as he moved into Lindsay's room he started talking, "I hope you like these caramels Linds, the line was unbelievable." He kept smiling as the group turned to look at him. "Oh hey, looks like dinner time pumpkin." He'd give this Nico character a few points for stepping away from his daughter's bed as he got there. He moved to the head of her bed and actually did smile down at her. "Hey baby." He held up the chocolate box. "I guess you can save these for dessert then." He bent over and kissed her. "I made sure to not smell this time."

Lindsay giggled nervously and then took a deep breath. He was right, he only smelled clean and soapy. There was nothing there to remind her of the factory and HIM. That was how she thought of her assailant, in all capital letters. He wasn't a person. It was a HIM. She didn't want to call HIM by name, so she didn't. There were tears in her eyes as she pulled her father against her. "Daddy, I love you so much."

Ray wrapped his arms around his daughter and then suddenly he was crying. He wasn't really sure why or if he could explain it, but he was sobbing as he held her. In his eyes she was six and some evil man had just destroyed her innocence. "Lindsay, it's not fair…it's not right. I wish I could have protected you and stopped them from hurting you."

Lindsay sobbed with her father. "Me too…you have no idea how much I wish you could have done that." She pulled back and grabbed a napkin from the over-bed table. "But, here I am and I have to make the best of it. Move on from here, get better. I don't want to be scared forever, so I need to get better so I don't have to feel this way anymore." She wiped her nose.

She didn't want to feel so scared; she hated feeling this way all the time. It really was like when she had a bad dream and went to Ray Jay's room. Ray Jay and that damn light saber made her feel strong. She could hear him breath beside her and then just flip the switch on that silly toy and the shadows went away. She wanted out of the hospital. She needed to get stronger so she didn't need help to do everything, because asking for help made her think about HIM. She wanted the bruises gone and her foot healed because they were just huge reminders of HIM. She didn't want to see HIM every time she closed her eyes, but maybe if the big things went away that would too. She needed HIM to stop hiding in the darkness so much. She didn't want to be afraid of the dark.

She looked at her dad. She'd try to stick with normal. "Did you eat? Nico always gets too much food." She motioned to the Chinese. "There's Moo Shu."

Ray looked at his daughter and shook his head. "You're amazing." He kissed her temple and nodded. "Sure, let's eat." He wiped his eyes and glanced to his ex-wife. She nodded at him and he smiled at her. He glanced around. "Where is Nico?"

Dani waved to the door. "He went to see if he could get some plates." She motioned to the bags. "There're forks, but we need plates."

Ray snorted and slapped at his son's hand. "Not that it's stopping our eldest." He glared at him. "Someone else might want some of the fried rice Ray Jay."

"I'm starving dad," he ate two more forkfuls, "seriously, there's no food in this room you know, and I've been stuck in it for hours."

Nico was back waving paper plates. "If that is the shrimp fried rice Ray Jay, you are a dead man."

"Nope, no shrimp…" he smiled around a mouthful of rice and a bite of egg roll. "But I'm glad you brought plates, because I'm needing something more substantial." He grabbed a plate and started pouring food onto a plate with a smile. "Come to papa."

Nico smiled as everyone put food on their plates. He was a firm believer in food bringing people together. He kept himself off to the side while the family made their plates and he smiled when Dani brought him a plate with shrimp fried rice and a spring roll. "I could have made my own plate." He took it and then her hand. "Thank you." He added quietly.

She stepped closer, pressed against him as she looked up at him. The air seemed to leave her lungs in a whoosh. "You're welcome." She was breathless, "Thanks for dinner." She set a hand on his shoulder and her thumb rubbed his jaw. She raised an eyebrow. "You shaved."

He smiled and turned his head so that his lips could graze her hand. "Mm-hm, we should eat Dani." He nodded toward the food. "Before it's too cold." He stepped back.

She shook her head. "Oh, yea…okay." She turned to the table and picked up a plate. "Where's the Moo Shu?"

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Nico stood by the door at watched the family play euchre. Dani and Lindsay were winning, but he wasn't sure it was because they were really that good at the game. Nico suspected cheating, but he'd have to ask Dani about it later. Something seemed suspicious about a hand to her necklace as a signal for hearts, and he was honing in on a foot tap for spades. He saw Lindsay use a palm face up on the table for clubs and he was thinking it was a touch to the ears for diamonds. He was wondering how the boys didn't see it. Though the girls were subtle, he'd picked up on it pretty quickly.

The nurse knocked and poked her head in. "Excuse me, but visiting hours are ending and we're going to need to limit the visitor to two for the night."

Nico smiled and nodded at her. "We'll get that straightened out, thanks."

She smiled at him. "Thank you." She looked to Lindsay. "Do you need anything Lindsay?"

"Not now, I'm okay, but I think I'm due for my pain medicine in half an hour."

The nurse looked at her tablet and scrolled down then she nodded. "Yep, I'll bring it back with me." Then she was gone.

Ray stood up and stretched. He looked at his daughter. "Linds, I'd like to stay with you baby. Your mom was here last night and I didn't get a chance to help. I want to if I can." He took her hand. "I used to stay up with you when you were sick and your mom was in school." He looked to Dani and back to his daughter. "I'd like to if you think it would be okay and I know your mom could use a good sleep."

Lindsay looked at her mom and nodded. "I'm okay mom." She looked at her brother. "How about Dad and Ray Jay? Like at Dad's? We can watch movies?" She smiled and sat up. "Ray Jay could run home and pick up a couple DVDs, there's a player on the TV here."

Dani smiled at her excitement and glanced at her son.

He nodded. "It's cool mom. Sounds fun. I mean, we do it at dad's place all the time." His smile got wider. "'Sides, then I can skip school again."

Dani rolled her eyes and looked to Ray. "You okay with Ray Jay staying too? It's another day out of school?"

Ray nodded. "I think after everything they've both been through Dani…" he let his words trail off.

She swallowed and nodded and reached for his hand and squeezed it. She looked at her daughter and then bent to hug her. "Linds," she whispered against her ear, "you sure you're gonna be okay?"

Lindsay nodded. "I'll be fine mom and I have the coat. I can call you if I need to. Dad's here and so is Ray Jay…we'll be good. I promise." She hugged her mother. "You'll come if I need you. I know you will." She pulled tighter. "Both of you will."

Dani nodded. "Definitely, both of us if you need, call." She kissed her temple and pulled back.

Lindsay smiled and then leaned around Dani and looked to Nico. "Hey, don't think you're leaving without a hug old man." She giggled at the man by the door.

Nico shook his head at her, but he ducked into the room. He shot Ray an apologetic glance and then bent to the girl in the bed. "I'm not that old." He winked. "You behave, no chasing that cute intern down the hall." He smiled.

She reached up and hugged him. "You're not too old to kick some ass that's for sure." She kissed his cheek. "Thanks, take care of my mom and make sure she gets some sleep?"

He squeezed her shoulder and nodded. "Done. You rest, heal and then help me keep TK in line." He straightened up and stepped back. He turned to Ray. "You have one hell of a daughter. You did an excellent job raising her. She's stronger than a lot of men I know." He held out his hand.

Ray gave Nico a hard look before he finally took his hand. "Thanks…for uh, everything." He nodded toward Lindsay. "I appreciate everything you've done, but if you hurt her. I will kill you."

Nico nodded. "I understand and I wouldn't expect anything else from a father." He offered the man a genuine smile, winked at Lindsay and then dropped Ray's hand before heading to the door where Dani was talking to Ray Jay. He slid an arm around Dani's waist so he stood half beside and half behind her. He kissed her cheek as he settled her against his hip. "You ready? Where's your coat?"

She leaned into him a bit, savoring the feel of him. She felt at home against him. "I'm good to go. Ray Jay's riding with us and he'll drive his own car back." She looked back over her shoulder. "We are going to the house right?"

He smiled and nodded. It was closer to the hospital, so he figured she'd feel better there than the apartment. "It's closer, that's fine. Your coat?"

She looked around the room and then pointed to the far corner.

He nodded, gathered her coat and then his own. He pulled his on and then helped her into hers. He took the small bag from her even after she protested and then held out his arm. When she took it, he smiled. "Shall we?"

She nodded. "Come on Ray Jay, let's get you home, so you can get back with your movies before it's so late you're all asleep watching them." She looked back at her daughter. "Call me if you need me baby."

Lindsay rolled her eyes. "Mom OMG, dad's here, Ray Jay will be here, and," she held up Nico's coat, "I even have my trusty security guard blanket." She winked at Nico and giggled at her joke. "We will be fine and yes, if I need you I will call; I promise. Now go home and sleep in a real bed, please?"

Dani wiped her eyes and nodded. She didn't need to ask Nico for it, because he'd already pulled her closer to comfort her knowing she'd need his strength.

He pressed his lips to her ear and added for her only. "She's strong, like you Dani." His thumb brushed along the skin at the nape of her neck. "She gets all of that from you." His lips brushed the same area lightly, barely a ghost of a kiss and then he added, "Let's get you and Ray Jay home."

She nodded and let him lead her out the door.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

It hadn't taken them long to get home. While Ray Jay was upstairs grabbing movies and whatever else, Nico went to work pulling together a bag of snacks from the kitchen and Dani set about putting together a bag for Lindsay. She'd only be in the hospital a couple more days, but clean clothes and her own shampoo would make her feel better. She met Ray Jay at the top of the stairs.

He smiled and waved a light saber at her triumphantly.

"It still works. I put new batteries in and it's like new." He pushed the button and it lit up. "I'm gonna give it to Linds so she can keep it with her. Just like when we were kids mom." He bent and hugged her. "Maybe it will still help her feel safe. Whaddya think?"

Dani's eyes were teary. She blinked as she hugged him. She nodded into his shoulder. "I think she'll love it." She pulled him tight against her. "Make sure you give this to her too, okay and Nico's got food for you guys…snacks and stuff. So get that from him before you go."

He pulled back and kissed her on the cheek. "Cool. Love you mom." He slid the bag she had over his shoulder and hurried down the steps with a smile on his face.

Dani wiped her eyes with a catch in her heart and her throat. She sank down on the top step and leaned against the wall. A few tears streaked her cheeks and she let them stay there. Her kids were growing up so fast and they were so strong, but they were still so young and that dichotomy touched the maternal side of her. She watched Ray Jay leave out the door and heard his car start. A second later Nico was at the bottom of the stairs.

"You okay up there?" He started up the steps.

"I'm not sure." She took a breath and shook her head. "I don't think so. I want to be, but no…"

He stopped a few steps below her so he was at eye level and leaned against the wall. He reached out and lifted her chin. He frowned. "Hey, you want to talk?"

She shook her head and started crying harder, she reached for his hand and gripped it desperately as her lip quivered. Her eyes clung to his just as desperately. She mouthed the word, "No," but no sound passed her lips.

He climbed the remaining steps then. "Come here." He tugged the hand he was holding until she stood and when she did he leaned into her pressing her back against the wall. "You're exhausted."

She sighed and looked up at him. She blinked to clear her tears and relished the heat of him against her as he pressed his full length to her. "Nico…" her hands slid to his shoulders and into his hair. "You make me feel okay." She leaned forward and kissed his chin, pulled his head down and kissed up his jaw to the corner of his lips. She traced the seam of his lips with her tongue. She moaned softly when he responded by thrusting his hips against hers.

He captured her face with his hands and pulled back to press his forehead to hers. "Dani, you're so exhausted you can't think straight. You need to sleep." He kissed her softly and gently and pulled back with some difficulty. "It's not that I don't want to baby. God knows I do." He pressed himself against her to prove his point, "But, you need to sleep…everything's confused for you right now. Sleep then I promise; I'll make love to you."

She shook her head and pressed her face to his chest as she cried. "I want normal. I need something normal. I want you to make me forget for a few minutes that things are all fucked up." She pulled back and looked at him. "I want to feel something other than this horrible guilt and pain for my daughter." She sobbed and closed her eyes. "Fuck, I need to stop feeling this anger toward these people who hurt her, even if it's just for thirty minutes." Her hands curled into his shoulders. "I need that. I need something to do that and you do that. I love you so much…and I need that right now. Please?" She blinked and found his eyes again.

"Dani…" He whispered just as his lips crushed against hers. He wanted her desperately. He needed her as much as she needed him; even more. He was just afraid to admit it. His emotions were mixed up in his past and as he pulled her against him he warred with the violence in himself. He tried to temper his response, pushed that part back into its closet and tried to put the lock back on it. The small growl in the back of his throat as his hand slanted Dani's head so that his mouth could devour hers didn't do much to assure him that he'd restrained the monster, but Dani responded to him eagerly.

Her small hands gripped and groped his shoulders and hips and needy sounds slipped from her own throat. She danced against him with graceful, lust filled movements that only pushed his desire up about one hundred notches and made him struggle even more to control himself. He knew she had no idea what she was doing to his control. He usually had a wealth of it, but his emotion was high and he really wished he wasn't in the middle of trying to control what was going on in his own head right now. He'd thought it was bad right after Marshall had died, but he felt so much more raw right now. He still hadn't dealt with all of that and now he had to deal with everything else. He needed to process and he hadn't had the chance. It hadn't been long since Marshall's death. Then, Juliette, Gabby, Dani…and now this; he couldn't do this right now. He wasn't sure if he could hang on to his control with her.

He pulled back with an almost vicious growl and held Dani against the wall by her shoulders as he panted and caught his breath. His eyes were glazed over and he saw her pupils wide with passion and he wished he didn't have to see the confusion and hurt look on her face as she struggled to catch her breath. "Dani listen to me…" He willed her to see how difficult this was for him. He shook his head and let one hand move to her jaw to rest against her cheek and cradled her head. "I'm at the edge of my control…everything's been too much."

She squinted up at him in confusion and turned her head toward his palm. "You've done it before…I can handle it...Please, I need you." She kissed his hand. "Please." She wanted him, needed him so desperately she needed him to see it.

He didn't want to hurt her, but a part of him wanted to take something from her to push her to force her to her knees and see tears on her face. "Dammit Dani." He grabbed her arm and pulled her toward her room. He slammed the door and turned on her. "I mean it." He toed off his shoes as his dark eyes raked over her with naked hunger.

Dani lifted her chin. She didn't back down. If this was how it was going to be, fine. "I'm not afraid of you." She reached for the button on her jeans and slid it free, then opened the zipper. Her eyes never left his face. "I love you Nico Careles and if you're trying to scare me, keep trying." She swallowed and licked her lips before pushing her jeans and panties down her hips. She kicked her shoes off and her pants followed them over her feet. Then she defiantly pulled her sweater over her head. She threw it to the floor. "You're not going to hurt me." She took a step closer and shivered at the intense heat in his eyes. "Okay, maybe not more than I want you too anyway." She took another step. "I know my goddamn safeword and I'll use it. It's quarterback and so far I've never needed to use it."

She held up her arm, the one he'd cut, and looked at it. "You cut me." Her eyes went unfocused for a second. "You said you'd done it before…" She touched his chest and leaned into him. "Is that what this is about? Something from your past?" She squinted up at him. "I don't care Careles, I don't give a damn, because I want you and I need you." She touched the buckle of his belt with trembling hands. It was the same belt he'd used to put welts on her ass. She shivered. "Do you need to use this again?" She looked up at him from under her lashes. Her voice was quiet, but her words were said without hesitation.

Nico covered her hands with his own. "Oh my god Danielle…" His hands slid up her arms and he crushed her against him. "I meant what I said." He wasn't gentle when he kissed her. He tugged her bra cups down roughly and her moan only encouraged him. He found one breast and pulled the nipple, pinched it harshly until he knew it would bruise. All the while he bit at her lower lip. He pressed a knee between her legs and growled against her neck.

He reached for her left arm. He pulled the tape from the bandage covering the knife wound and then quickly unwrapped the gauze. He dropped the entire bandage to floor and then lightly traced the barely healing line on her arm. He watched her eyes as she shivered against him. "You're in my head Dani. This is in my head." He pressed a thumb roughly into her wrist bones below the wound.

She whimpered and leaned into him. "Oh fuck…" A bit of dizziness hit her. "What are you doing to me?"

He shook his head and growled deep in his throat. He pressed a kiss to her wrist and then the middle of her arm as he watched her eyes. "Me? It's you who's made me crazy Dani." He kissed further up her arm and reached back to undo her bra. He pulled it down her arm and let it fall to the ground. "You make me think about things I let go of a long time ago. Dreams Dani…impossible things." He kissed her and drew out the kiss until she was breathless and writhing against him. He pulled back, grabbed her jaw and looked her in the eye. "Then the violence of the past day makes me need things, want things pushes me to limits."

She gasped and held his shoulders to steady herself. "Nico…I…"

"Shh…I want you hard." His teeth scraped the tender skin along her collarbone. He pushed her to her knees and worked open his fly. "Like I've never had you before Dani…I want your tears…your submission…God Dani, I need you so much." He stopped before he said more.

Dani looked up at him from her knees and shivered. She nodded slowly at him. "Yes." Oh god…she was so wet at his words. And as she watched him undo his belt and open his fly it only made her throb and ache. "Please…" She sat up and licked her lips. Her hands slid up to his hips. And she pulled his pants down when he had them loose. Then she wrapped her hand around the base of him and her mouth followed around the thick, leaking tip of him.

Nico groaned when she touched him and then felt her tongue swirl around the tip. He tugged on her hair. "Now, put your hands back on my hips." He waited until she did and then he slowly slid deep into sweet, wet mouth. His hands sank into her hair and he watched her face. He felt her tongue slide over his cock and he moaned and slid deeper into her throat. He stayed deep in her throat for a few long seconds before he pulled out and let her catch her breath.

Dani fought the urge to gag around him and tears ran from her eyes. There was a moment of panic when she needed to breathe and then he was pulling out and she took a quick breath before he was back in her throat. She realized she had no control with her hands where they were and his buried in her hair and it only increased her arousal in some way. She looked up at him and watched as he pushed the hair from her eyes and smiled wickedly at her. He growled as she struggled not to gag again.

God, she couldn't explain the sudden flush of heat that shot through her, but her nipples ached and moisture was running down her inner thighs. The look on his face was the biggest turn on for her. She saw love and pride on his face and something else she couldn't name as she let him thrust into her throat and use her mouth. She found his rhythm and started moving her tongue with him and then suddenly, he stopped, pulled out and roughly yanked her to her feet with a thick moan.

Dani panted and tried to catch her breath. She was shaking with need and she gripped his arms when he dragged her to him. He kissed her roughly and then spun her so her back was to his chest. His hand found its way between her legs to tease her clit before two fingers slid inside. Her moan echoed through the room and her head fell against his shoulder. "Nico, god…please…"

His cheek was pressed to hers and he smiled. "Fuck Dani…" His hand moved from between her legs and then he forced her roughly face down on the bed. "Stay." He shoved her legs apart with his hands on her knees and pressed a kiss to the dimples on her ass. Then he bit her right ass cheek hard enough to leave teeth marks.

She screamed at the sensation, unsure. "What?" She looked over her shoulder.

He smiled at her and landed two sharp slaps. "I said stay." He smoothed his palm over her ass and stood to pull his sweater and shirt over his head. "Put your head down Dani."

She shivered and did as he asked. Her ass was still sore and the slaps hurt more than they normally would have. It hadn't been long since they had been at his loft where he had used his belt on her.

He stood there and looked down at her. He wanted her so fucking much. He needed her just as much. His need to take her warred with his need to dominate, hurt and mark her. All the pain from his past, all the guilt from not being able to keep the people he cared about safe rose up inside him. All the violence from his past just pushed against the walls he'd built up and crashed against them wave after wave until they faltered and began to crack. All his rituals, all his reserves and all the fail safes he tried to keep in place weren't working. His self-control around Dani was weak and Marshall was gone, Gabrielle had stirred up so much from the past and he wanted to do violence because of what had happened to Juliette and now even more so with Lindsay.

He bent and picked his jeans up from the floor. He pulled the belt from the loops and his heart sped up as he folded it in half in his hand. He closed his eyes and imagined the sound of it as it hit Dani's skin. He could almost hear her gasps and moans and see the color bloom on her flesh. He tightened his grip on the belt and felt the buckle bite into his palm. He moaned and opened his eyes. Her ass was still tender from the last time. He shouldn't even be considering this. He reached out his left hand and traced one of the lightly , faded lines.

Dani gasped at the contact. He hadn't touched her and she'd been waiting, barely breathing. The anticipation had been killing her, even though it hadn't been that long. The gasp turned to a light moan when his fingers trailed the sensitive skin between her cheeks and down between her legs. She pressed against hand greedily.

He teased her. She was so slick and his fingers slid easily over her swollen flesh. He grazed her clit and then moved his fingers inside her and then back through her slit and over her ass again. She was sensitive and she moaned and moved with him. He hesitated a second and then as his fingers slid down her slit again, he brought the belt down low on her ass, just across the top of her thighs in a short, sharp, blow in the crease.

Dani gasped and moaned as she gripped the comforter and tried to arch away from the blow and into Nico's hand at the same time, which was impossible because his hand was moving in the same direction as the belt. She bit her lip and blinked back the tears as she blew a harsh breath through her pursed lips.

He stroked over her labia again, pressing the lips together and spreading her slickness over her even more. He closed his eyes and teased her slowly letting his fingers move and explore. He brought the belt down again in almost the same exact spot just as he rolled his fingertips over her clit. She arched under him this time with a short yelp and he repeated the blow immediately and then pressed his hand over the spot he'd hit pressing the nerve endings and extending the pain. She bucked under him at that and he smiled with a growl. "Mm, good…you okay baby?" He traced the welt that rose in the spot he kept abusing.

Dani nodded against the bed and sniffed. "Yea." She shifted her legs wider.

He bent over her, pressed his chest to her back and his cock pressed against her ass, riding easily against the slickness he'd been spreading with his fingers. He moaned against her neck and bit softly. "God, you are so fucking incredibly beautiful right now." He moved against her, torturing himself with the friction. "I could take you right now Dani, just like this." He thrust and pressed and the head of him shifted against her.

She stiffened. She wasn't comfortable with where he'd settled. "Nico…I…" Did he mean what she thought? "I…I've never…"

"Shh…" He smiled against her cheek and grabbed her hands. One in each of his and then he chuckled before he bit at her ear. "Mmm, but fuck baby that would feel so good." He pulled at the ear he had between his teeth. "Trust me, and one day when I have more control, but not tonight Dani…"

Dani swallowed. She wasn't sure she believed him about how it would feel, and she was not sure she'd be okay with one day, but she did trust him. She shivered when he bit her and her eyes closed. He shifted her position and pulled her up on to her hands and knees. His belt slid around her neck suddenly and then he slid the other end through the buckle and cinched it down around her neck. She looked back at him.

He smiled from behind her and held the end like a leash. "God Dani, I've been fighting the desire to see you in a collar." He shifted his position and moved his hand so it was behind her head. "Fuck…we need to talk about that soon." He tightened his grip and rolled the loose end around his hand and the belt tightened around her neck.

Dani shifted to her knees and watched his face. She wasn't exactly sure what he was talking about, but as he tightened his grip, the belt tightened around her neck and the breathing became more difficult. She reached up to her throat with both hands and her eyes pulled together. "Nico…" She gave him a worried look. She wasn't struggling to breathe yet, but she was wondering what was going on.

"Trust me Dani. I know. It's about letting me have the control." He watched her face. He willed her to understand. He needed her to let him have this. He didn't want to hurt her. He could do this and not hurt her. This he could control, but she had to give herself over to him.

She shook her head as he tightened the belt a bit more and the belt pinched against her throat. Now she could hear the blood in her ears. A big whoosh-whoosh sound as her throat and the large blood vessels were compressed. She started coughing and turned her head, struggling. She pulled at the belt in a panic. "Nico…I…" Fat tears of fear ran down her cheeks. "I'm…scared…"

He nodded and moved closer to pull her back against his chest. "I know, let go Dani. I won't take you too far." He tightened the belt and watched her face. He let her struggle some. He whispered by her ear. "Calm down and it's easier. Don't fight it, breathe slowly and it's easier. Less air hunger and dizziness, I promise you're doing good baby…let go, just let go…" He watched her eyes, kept his eyes on hers.

She locked her gaze on his and when he tightened belt she didn't panic. She kept her eyes open. She felt it though…the same feelings she felt when he'd spanked her and used the belt; that freedom. She blinked and moaned and leaned heavy against Nico. She felt his hand move between her legs and she bucked against him suddenly as sensations rushed through her. Maybe it was lack of oxygen, she felt that too. That deliciously odd dizzy feeling with a side of nausea, but this was something else. She shivered and then the belt was gone and she was on her back and he was over her and she blinked. She blinked again and he said something to her and then he was gone and on the third blink he was back.

His hand stroked over her clit and bent her right knee and she moaned, "Fuck…" Then her entire body rocked upward as he thrust roughly inside her.

He couldn't wait. He'd watched her let go and give herself over to him. She'd relaxed into him, her eyes locked on his and when he saw her start to fade, he'd released the belt and laid her down. She was still conscious, he knew that and he said her name, moved to get a condom from the drawer and then he was inside her. He didn't care how hard. He wanted hard, needed hard. He was on his knees between her legs and he shoved a pillow under her hips and drove into her over and over. When he saw she was more alert he pulled her up over him and shifted so she was against the headboard.

"Hold onto the headboard Dani." He grunted out the order, but barely paused his thrusting. "Arms straight out to the side. Hold tight." He paused for a second while she did and then grunted and resumed his angry thrusts upward as he held her hips and pulled her down against him. "Fuck yes. Fuck yes." He bit and kissed at her neck and chest. He moved violently into her and against her. "I need you Dani…harder…" He grabbed her head, jerked her face to his. "Look at me." He ordered when her eyes drifted closed.

Dani's head fell back over the headboard and she moaned loudly and moved against him. She needed what he was giving her. His words pushed at her. She wanted him hard, needed him the same way, "Yes…please, harder." She knew she was going to hurt, but she didn't care. She wanted it. She groaned when he hit a particularly sensitive spot inside her and tears formed in the corner of her eyes. She bit her lip and moved against him even harder. She opened her eyes when he grabbed her face and ordered eyes open. "Nico…please…" She was breathless.

He held her head and kept ramming into her. "Dani fuck I love you…fuck yes…need you this way." He didn't hold back and even though he knew she wasn't with him, at this point that didn't matter, he couldn't hold back if he wanted to.

He held her eyes. "I'm sorry."

He thrust harder three times and then he came. He kept his eyes on hers and continued to move against her knowing he'd stay hard for some time. He reached between them and touched her as he thrust and rocked. He knew she was close and he circled her clit, pulled and pressed and she whimpered against his throat and he felt her clench around him once.

"Shhh, baby cum…do it."

She shivered against him. "Please…." She looked up at him desperate for something more.

He smiled and his free hand sank into her hand and pulled roughly as his right played against her clit. It was what she needed because her eyes went wide for him and she bucked against him.

"Nico…" She gripped his shoulder and her head arched backward into one palm as her lower body pressed into his other. "Fuck…yes." She started giggling then. Her laughter mixed with tears and then she wrapped her arms around him and he fell back against the bed. "I love you." She kissed him.

He laughed and rolled them so he could take the condom off. He was wondering if they could discuss the need for them. He didn't mind using them, but they were obviously in a relationship. He tied it off and for the time being dropped it by the head of the bed. He'd get it when he got up. "I love you too." He was sweaty, but he didn't care that she was pressed against him at the moment. He lay sprawled with her half on top of him as he waited for their skin to cool and their breathing to return to normal.

Dani touched her throat and smiled. Her voice was scratchy when she spoke. "That was different."

He ran his fingers softly over her neck. "Sorry, I didn't want to hurt you and I knew I could get what I needed with breath play." He shifted and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I didn't mean to scare you."

She shifted against his chest and moved her head to the pillow so she could see his face easier. "It all scares me in the beginning." She traced his cheekbone with her finger and then over his lips. She was amazed at how sexy he was. She blinked back tears at the thought. "You make me feel so amazing. You are just so damn sexy."

He shook his head and pushed damp hair from her forehead. He rolled so he was on his elbow and looking down at her. He wiped her tears. "You are seriously the most amazing woman I have ever known and we need to sit down and talk soon." His heart was pounding. "I don't know how to tell you everything I want to say or need to say, but right now; thank you." He cupped her cheek and kissed her slowly. His lips pressed against hers and the kiss built in intensity until tongues met, battled and retreated. Then teeth bit and tongues soothed. He moaned and pulled back thinking he could take her again. He wanted to, and if he kissed her another five minutes like that he'd be able to. "Dani, shit you'll kill me. I swear you will."

She stared up at him, gasped for breath and shook her head. Her emotions were going round in her head. She pulled at his shoulders almost desperate to have him closer. "You saved my baby Nico." She bit her lips as that thought overwhelmed. "I'd give you anything right now…anything." She shook her head. "I doubt I would have told you no, no matter what you would have asked me for."

He moaned and pressed against her hip. There were so many things he wanted from her…with her. "Dani…" Her voice was like a prayer form his lips. "There's so much I can't wait to explore with you, but I need to have control of myself when I go there." He shook his head. "Today I couldn't be sure I wouldn't hurt you."

She pressed a hand to his cheek and rolled her eyes at him. "You'd never hurt me."

He gave her a deadly serious look. "Tonight I'm on edge Dani. I want to hurt the people who hurt Lindsay and there are other things bubbling to the surface from the past. It's a perfect storm threatening my control." He took her hand and started tracing the kanji for balance onto her palm. "This is balance." He looked her in the eye. "It's something I'm struggling to find right now and it's something I need if I'm going to top you, or anyone else Dani."

Dani growled at him. "There had better not be anyone else."

He smiled and leaned in to kiss her cheek. "There's no need for anyone else with you."

She shook her head and rolled her eyes again. "You better mean that."

He stopped tracing the figure on her hand. "I don't lie Dani; ever." He gave her a hard look. "Don't doubt that and I need to let you know that you should start considering eye rolling as dangerous to your ass, along with the whining." He smiled and kissed her. Then he pulled back and added, "Unless you're trying to give me reasons to spank you?"

She blushed and pressed her face into his shoulder. "Not right now I'm not."

He rubbed her shoulder and pulled her against him. "I know baby." He smiled and rolled so he was spooned against her. "Do you want to talk Dani?" He kissed her ear and laced his fingers with hers. "I wish I could have gotten there sooner. I'm so fucking sorry about that." He pulled her tighter against him.

Dani frowned even though he couldn't see her face. She pulled his hand to her mouth and kissed his palm. "Don't be sorry. None of this is your fault. You stopped him. You stopped the asshole that was hurting my baby." Dani started sobbing and pulled Nico's hand to her heart where she pressed it. "If it weren't for you…he would have…god Nico…she…" Her words caught in her throat.

Nico closed his eyes and tried to stop his tears. He'd been so close to being too late. "Dani…" He buried his face in her hair and let the tears fall. "He still hurt her and the boys did too, before I even got there. God, there's a video…I want them dead Dani and it's killing me that I do and even more that they're still breathing." He hated that he was crying.

She sat up and crossed her legs with the sheet over her and then settled his head into her lap. She looked down at him with her lip between her teeth. She ran her fingers through his hair. "Shh." She rocked back and forth. "I told you if you loved like a parent that was normal and then of course we can't kill them, can we?" She wiped her eyes and then she wiped the tears from his face. He was breaking her heart and he reminded her of a boy; a broken hearted little boy. "You're my hero Nico. Not a failure for getting there too late. You're Lindsay's hero…You're Juliette's hero…don't you see that? You haven't failed any of us."

He stayed in her lap for another minute and then he sat up and pulled her into his arms. He leaned against the headboard and just held her. He didn't say anything for the longest time. He didn't want to. He simply wanted to hold her, to feel her against him and to know that she was there with him.

He finally whispered gruffly, "Thank you."

She nodded against his chest. "I love you. I'll do anything for you. I'll give you whatever you need. Time, space…just tell me."

He pulled her tighter against him and kissed her. "All I need is you Dani. You're my north star. You're the way through my darkest nights."

She pressed her eyes shut. "Oh hell…you're mine." She whispered just before he kissed her again, hard and senseless, and she forgot how to breathe.


	23. Caught and Released

**NOTE:** Long story short...personal stuff and holiday, but HAPPY NEW YEAR! It's not that long, but it's here. I hope you enjoy and I hope to be back on track, but personal stuff takes time to get around, so there might be more to deal with, so just be patient. I still write, it just takes me longer and my brain doesn't like to rework the rewrites. **  
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I appreciate everyone who reviews, follows and keeps reading: you all rock. You all know by now that I have no beta, so that means mistakes belong to me and my lack of being a perfectionist, but then if I were...you'd never get a chapter. So, without further wordiness...

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**Caught and Released**

Ronnie rolled over and sighed. She hadn't bother going to bed. She knew she'd just wake Angie up, so she'd slept on the couch. She'd spent a long time at the hospital. They'd been rotating a guard on Lindsay's room. It was completely volunteer and no one was being paid, but so far everyone had signed up for a shift. She looked at the clock and winced. She had to get up for work in two hours and Angie would be up any minute.

As if on cue, the kitchen light flipped on. Angie flipped the coffee maker to on and glanced at the couch.

"Babe?" Angie moved into the living room. "Why didn't you come to bed?"

Ronnie pushed herself upright. "I knew I wasn't gonna sleep." She lifted her arm and let Angie snuggle under it, pulled her close and kissed her temple. She pulled the afghan up over them. "I didn't want to keep you up. I know you have to work."

"You do too." Angie yawned and poked Ronnie's side. "Don't act like I'm the only one pulling long hours around here. You slept with your gun again." She looked up at her girlfriend from her shoulder, but didn't make another comment about the weapon. She'd been wearing it more around the house. "Hugo asked where you were."

"Did you tell him I was working?" She pushed Angie's bangs out of her eyes and smiled into her eyes. She loved that she was letting her hair grow out for her. She knew Angie liked it short, but fuck, she wanted to see her with long hair.

"Yea, of course and I told him you'd be here to see him off to daycare." She stretched. "So how's the kid? They got all the people involved right?"

She nodded. "They arrested three people at the scene, yea. No one raped her, I mean she was heavy duty assaulted, but they didn't take it all the way." She paused, her eyes moving over the other woman's face and then she glanced away. "She's scared and hurt, but she's doing okay I guess. She's a strong kid, good family and the boss is helping her a lot." She stared across the room and pulled Angie tighter to her side.

"And you, how are you doing?" The smaller woman knew that she was upset by what she'd seen. It had brought a lot of memories to the surface.

"I'm okay baby." She sighed. "I'm doing okay. I have you now." She looked at Angie and smiled. "And Hugo and I wouldn't trade him for the world."

"Me either…" She sat up. "Maybe for a quieter, less dirty version of himself…one without his Mama's temper?" She winked at Ronnie and then stood. "You want coffee?"

"Yea, but I'm coming." She took Angie's hand and followed her to the kitchen. It was true, she wouldn't trade Hugo for anything. She loved him and Angie more than life, but what she had before was great too. "Let me grab the paper."

"Cool."

She paid extra for the paper to be dropped outside their door. She keyed the alarm code and unlocked the door. Then she checked the peephole and with her hand on the gun, she opened the door. She picked up the paper and then locked the door behind her.

She sat at the table and spread out the paper. She smiled and looked up when Angie set a cup next to her. "Thanks baby." She kissed Angie's cheek when the woman kissed hers. "Love you."

"Love you too, I'm gonna shower."

"Okay. You want pancakes?" She asked without looking up from the paper.

"No, I'm gonna eat some yogurt, but thanks." Then she carried her cup and moved into the bathroom in the hall.

Ronnie flipped to the local section and found the story on Lindsay and the arrests. Lindsay's name wasn't mentioned since she was a minor, but the Harper boys were mentioned by name as was Mr. Lewis. There was mention of another suspect that had been brought in for questioning. He'd been held overnight and released.

She blinked and reread the line. "Kenneth Ellis, 19, was held overnight for questioning, it is not known at this time if charges have been brought, but he has been released. It is not known what his connection to the case is. When questioned, he gave not comment." There wasn't much more about him other than what they knew already. She took a long sip of coffee and checked the time. She wasn't sure she liked the feeling she had in her gut.

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He yawned and rolled over. Dani moved with him, staying pressed against him and she had been all night. He didn't mind, in fact he'd enjoyed it. He'd slept well. He kissed the top of her head as she snuggled against his side and then he smoothed her hair over his chest, before tucking it behind her ears. His fingers played over the curve of her neck and his heart clenched. God, he wanted exactly what he'd said last night. He really needed to talk to her.

His phone rang, interrupting his thoughts. He sighed and pulled his phone from the nightstand. He frowned at the time. It was only after seven and he didn't recognize the number. He accepted.

"Careles." He kept his voice low.

"Nico, it's Carson. I fucked up last time and you were right, so I'm telling you straight up this time. The Ellis kid, ah, Ken the driver of the SUV…we had to spring him. He has no priors and his daddy paid his bond. We don't have him on anything violent really. Your girl only has him on driving and like I said, we think it's him on the video, but without her testimony…"

"Ben," Nico sat, shoving the covers from him as he moved. His feet hit the floor and then he was looking for his jeans. He was angry. "You know how well this worked out last time." He found his pants and sat at the end of the bed. "Isn't the kid visible in the video?"

The other man sighed. "Not his face."

"Oh god, what the fuck didn't you tell me about this thing." He shoved his legs into his jeans and stood to pull them up. "I want an officer on my girl's room."

Ben laughed. "I can't do that, this kid doesn't have any history of violence, no prior record."

"Ben, you fucked up and she was violated." His voice was cold and deadly calm. "You don't want that to happen again...or worse."

"Are you threatening me?"

"I'm telling you. You owe her that uniform outside her room and I want a car outside Dr. Santino's house."

"I'm telling you, I can't. We have budget cuts…there's no overtime. I don't have the staff, the clearance." He cursed and mumbled something. "I get where you're coming from, I do and I know we fucked up before. I wish I could send you a car and a uni, but I can't. Use your guys, Nico." He snorted. "Nothing stopped you from using the big guy yesterday."

He almost smirked, but he was too agitated for humor. "I'm using everyone I can, but they're stretched thin as it is." He looked up to see Dani sitting up in the middle of the bed. She looked nervous. He moved to the bed and sat down. He pulled her against him and kissed her forehead. "If you can't, I'll take care of it then Ben. I promised her and her mother I'd keep her safe, but you better fucking let me know anything you find out before it happens. Are we clear?"

"I'll do my best and if she remembers anything that could get him back in custody. You know if it's anything about the time after he picked her up. If she can confirm he was hurting her, that he's also in the video, or anything else then we can use it to press further charges."

Nico knew what he was saying and he wished the legal system wasn't as fucked up as it was. They both knew that Kenneth Ellis was guilty and it was him on the video, only they couldn't prove it. Sometimes, the legal system sucked. "I'll see what I can do Ben. " He hung up and dropped his phone onto the bed.

"What is it?" Dani had the words out of her mouth before Nico took a full breath. "What's wrong?" She pulled back and looked at his face. She knew he was worried. "Tell me."

He took her hands. "Ken, the kid who was driving, they had to let him go Dani."

She gasped and shook her head. "What? He helped kidnap her and she ID'd him as the driver and he's out?

He rubbed his hands up and down her arms. He wished he could do something. He needed to do something. "He has a court date for that, but like Ray Jay he's out on bond." He was sick of bullshit. "He doesn't have a record and he's been non-violent. He…"

"He beat the hell out of Libby, that's why she broke up with him." She blinked at him. "He's sure as hell not nonviolent."

"I know, but in the system he's not violent. She never pressed charges and obviously no one else has either." He was pissed off. "I need to figure out who's watching her now and be sure to keep someone with you too."

She leaned into him. "I'll stay with you."

"You won't be able to all the time Dani." He smiled, "As much as I'd like you to."

His phone rang and he picked it up. It was Ronnie. He held the screen so Dani could see.

"I'll make us some coffee." She got up and found a robe.

"I'll be done in a sec." He answered the phone. "Yea?"

"Boss, you see the paper about the Ellis kid?"

Nico liked that she sounded pissed. "I didn't, but I got a call from Ben Carson a few minutes ago." He wasn't sure if it was good or bad that it was in the paper. "Where are you?"

"I'm taking Hugo in to daycare. Then I'm heading in to work. Carl's at the hospital if you're wondering."

He smiled. "I was, so thanks. When did he get there and when's he leaving?"

"He leaves as soon as your old ass gets there." There was noise and then. "Hugo honey don't throw your Cherrios, sorry about that. Damn he just nailed two day traders with a handful of cereal." She was laughing. "They didn't look amused, at least there was no milk involved."

Nico shook his head. He was sure they weren't. "Okay, we'll be there as soon as we can, but I need to run to the city. I need some things from my loft."

"You want me to get them? I'm closer, wouldn't be a big thing to pick up your shit and drop it to you."

He was shaking his head as he answered curtly. "No. I need to get it. It's personal."

"Hey man, whatever it was just an offer. No need to jump down my throat on it."

"Fuck, I'm sorry Ronnie I know you were just trying to help." He pulled his shirt from the floor with a sigh.

"It's okay, I get it. I know everyone's on edge and I don't like that this asshole's out either. I just wanted to make sure you knew and if you need anything I'll do my best to help. "

"Thanks. I'll see you later."

"Yea, I'm sure you will and you still owe me a rematch by the way." She laughed and hung up the phone.

He shook his head and lowered the phone before he pulled his shirt over his head. He sighed and then headed downstairs. He'd have a cup of coffee before he showered and dressed for the day. He'd drop Dani at the hospital and then go to the loft before heading back.

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There were only a few things he could think of that would make him do what he was doing. He moved the silk wall hanging and stared at the safe. He didn't want to open it. He had two safes in the apartment. This one was the one he never opened. He thought it was appropriate to hide it behind a hanging with a Chinese proverb saying, "Wisdom comes from experience."

He kept what was in that safe there because of experience. He swore he'd keep it there forever, but that was before he found something that meant more to him than his own life. Dani's children were her life. Something twisted in his heart; an old, old pain that he barely ever acknowledge because he really never had a chance to realize what it meant. He shook his head to clear it. Then he dragged his thumb over the fingerprint scanner and waited for it to blink green. When it did, he entered his code in the allotted amount of time. The safe unlocked with a triplet of beeps.

Nico reached for the handle and pulled the door slowly open. He didn't realize his hand was shaking until he reached inside. His fingers hesitantly wrapped around the grip of his Navy Sig P226. He pulled it from its resting place and set it down on the table and then with a sigh he reached back inside almost reverently. He smiled and pulled out a much older weapon. This one was his grandfather's Navy Colt and he let his fingers trace the engraving on the sides as the grip settled into his palm. He'd never fired it, and never would. It was simply a reminder and a connection to his past. It was a way to keep him close to someone he loved. He let his fingers hover over the initials engraved on the side and then he put it back in its resting place before closing the door to the safe.

He glanced down at the weapon on the table and frowned before he picked it up. He hadn't carried a firearm since returning from active duty. He swore he wouldn't and he didn't want to even now, but Dani meant more than the ghosts in his past. He reached for the Sig and held it. He let it settle in his hand and he was surprised at how familiar it felt. He figured that by now it would feel foreign and alien, but he was wrong. It still felt like it belonged.

He'd stopped using this particular weapon even before he left the SEALs. He had simply placed it in his foot locker and hadn't touched it again. So, he'd locked away his personal sidearm and he'd stopped using it after that day. It was the day when everything he thought he knew got turned upside down and he lost faith in what he thought he was fighting for and who he thought he was fighting with. His world was flipped upside down and even though orders were followed and medals were awarded he knew in his heart that what he had done was the work of evil men. He had felt evil that day and when he closed his eyes some nights; he still did. For a long time he wished Marshall would have left his ass over there. He still wondered if he had really tried to evade capture or if he'd just let them find him. He definitely defied those shit heads once they had him. He shivered and closed his eyes, fuck they sure knew how to torture a man. He shook off the memories and forced his eyes open.

The gun needed to be cleaned and he had the kit in his office. He kept his old foot locker up there against the wall. He moved up the stairs and stared at the locker. He had several things on top of it; a stack of books, a vase and an old piece of driftwood he'd scavenged from the shoreline. He retrieved the key for the lock from his desk, set the gun on down and then moved the items neatly to the floor. He then unlocked the chest.

Inside were items he'd collected over the years. Many of them were from his military years, though just as many weren't and he smiled as he set aside pictures that Juliette had drawn him when she was younger and a couple of Father's Day cards for her Uncle Nico that she had given him, all hand made. There were pictures of her as well. School photos, and snapshots, there was even a few elementary grade cards. He traced a finger over one of her in a small cap and gown for Kindergarten graduation and he swallowed emotion. He'd forgotten most of what he'd put in here. He didn't like opening the trunk, so he usually didn't.

He carefully moved the memories to the side and under an old green wool blanket he found the box he was looking for. He slid it out and replaced the things he'd removed. He locked the trunk, put the things back on top and carried the box to his desk.

He sat and set the box in front of him before rolling the combination lock to the proper sequence and opening the box. Inside there was a cleaning set and ammunition. He sat back and tried not to think about much as reflex took over. He quickly had the slide pulled back and away from the frame so that he could get to the barrel and recoil spring. He pulled out the cleaning kit and oil and set to work.

It didn't take him long to finish and reassemble the weapon. He then loaded two clips, loaded the Sig and pulled back the slide to chamber a round. He held the weapon at arm's length to sight it and wished he'd had time at the range. He hadn't fired a weapon of any kind in years. He wouldn't share that information with anyone, but it was true. He engaged the safety and lowered the weapon. Then he put the cleaning supplies and ammunition back in the small armored box, locked it and slid it into a desk drawer.

He hurried down the steps, moved to his closet and pulled the shirt he was in off. He quickly pulled on a blue striped button down and then located his shoulder holster. He slid it on, adjusted it and fitted the Sig into its place along with the extra clip. Then he pulled a sports coat from a hanger and slipped his arms through the sleeves as he moved out the door.

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Lindsay hadn't slept much, because each and every time she closed her eyes he was there or they were there, because it wasn't just HIM. There were glimpses of other people doing things she didn't really remember and she didn't like. She woke up a couple of times gagging, and had to throw up.

Her father had been there, he'd held her and she was thankful. He wasn't her mom, but she remembered he was good when she was sick. He got a cold washcloth for her head. He got her ice. He pulled her hair back. He rubbed her back. He even cried and told her he was sorry. She hated that look in his eyes though. It wasn't the same one that she saw in her mom's eyes or even Nico's it was different. Like something wasn't quite right about her and he needed to treat her differently.

Ray Jay was there and he wasn't doing that. He'd brought the light saber and she'd cried. He'd found it and put new batteries in it and it even made the stupid sounds now. Each time she woke up, she pressed the buttons and pulled Nico's coat closer. They both helped, but the new thoughts in her head weren't helping. She was scared. She didn't know where that was coming from. She didn't really remember it. She didn't even know what it was or who they were, but some of the things they did and said. She gagged and hauled the coat back to her shoulders, turned her face toward it. She inhaled and closed her eyes. Nico's scent and mom's were mixed at the collar and it helped. It made her think of home and mom and good things. He had saved her and right now she was safe.

Really she just wanted home. She wanted normal. She wanted to not be in the hospital with a bunch of strangers in and out constantly asking her how she was. She sighed and shoved rubbery eggs around her plate. Dad and Ray Jay had gone to get some coffee and Mom and Nico hadn't shown up yet, so she was alone and she was okay with it, but she was a little bored.

There was a knock on the door and the nurse poked her head in. She smiled. "Hey Linds, the hospital chaplain and counselor are here and they want to know if they can stop in. I know your mom and dad aren't here, but they just want to say hi." She glanced around the room. "We can leave the door open if you want, or that Carl guy is out here if you want him."

Lindsay didn't know Carl. I mean she knew he worked for the Hawks and all, but she didn't know him like Xeno or Ronnie or even Tommy. "If you leave the door open, it would be fine." She was bored and someone to talk to would be okay. She probably could talk to the counselor, but she wasn't sure what the chaplain would do for her though.

She folded her sheet over her and smiled waited. She wasn't expecting the people who walked through the door. Well, the counselor was about what she'd expect. A woman about her mother's age, maybe a little overweight and dressed professionally. She smiled warmly and carried a leather portfolio.

She wasn't sure the man was a chaplain at all, except his name tag indicated he was. He was about as tall as Nico and probably between twenty five and thirty years old. The first thing that stood out was his choice of clothing. He was wearing a pair of jeans with tears along the thighs and at the knees and Doc Martens on his feet. He had a Motorhead t-shirt on over a long sleeved Henley with the sleeves pushed up that only partially covered the tattoos on his arm, some of which were still visible at his neck. His ears were pierced, one was even gauged and he had an eyebrow piercing. He had an easy smile and his shoulder length hair was partially hidden under a dark grey knit cap. Did she mention he was gorgeous?

He moved to her bedside and smiled. He held out his hand. "Hey, I'm Greg. They let me call myself a chaplain," He bent his head and added conspiratorially, "but really I just hang out, drink their coffee, flirt and finger paint with the kids on the pediatric ward." He winked at her.

Lindsay giggled and shook his hand. "I'm Lindsay. I don't think the coffee is worth it."

He smiled and shook his head. "It's not, it's pretty much torture isn't it?" He motioned to the chair by her bed. "You mind if I sit?"

She shook her head.

"Cool." He dropped into the chair and kicked his boots up on the trashcan. He pointed to his partner. "That there is Mrs. Thacker, seriously that is her name and I keep telling her to back off on the suits, but she isn't listening."

The woman waved her hand and stepped around the bed to the other side. She held out her hand. "You can call me Sarah, honey. It's what everyone else calls me." She eyed Greg, "Except for Mr. Rhodes here."

Lindsay shook her hand. "Hi Sarah, so you're the counselor then?"

Sarah nodded. "Yes and I read your chart." She looked Lindsay in the eye. "I'm terribly sorry and if you want to talk we can. If you aren't ready, we don't have to. I know your mother is a therapist and this isn't a formal session or anything. This is just an offer of someone outside to listen. There is no charge while you're in the hospital." She pulled a card from her portfolio and handed to Lindsay. "This is my card, there's a number if you need me after hours. I can come in or talk over the phone. Either is completely acceptable in a situation like this."

She squeezed Lindsay's hand and Lindsay squeezed it back. She kind of liked the woman. "I might want to talk a little later…I'm not sure yet."

"You don't have to be sure of anything. You think about it." She pulled some more papers from her case. "This is information on sexual assault, trauma recovery and support groups. Some are online and some we offer locally. I just want you to have the information so you can decide what to do with it." She nodded. "No pressure, okay?"

Lindsay glanced to Greg, who was sitting in the chair with his head back and eyes closed like he was sleeping. Hell, maybe he was. She still didn't know what to make of the guy other than he was strange, hot and there was no way he was a chaplain. She looked to Sarah again. She pointed at the man with her thumb. "Is he really a chaplain?"

Sarah smiled and whispered. "Yes and a very good one."

"I heard that Thacker. I'm noting the date and time for posterity." One eye opened and then he sat forward and rested his elbows on his knees. "So, you can't believe in something and like, who do I like today," he glanced at his shirt, "Motorhead, tattoo yourself and poke a few extra holes in your face? Damn, people are just so fucking closed minded anymore." He smiled across the bed at Sarah who was shaking her head.

Lindsay was giggling. "Seriously did you just say damn and fuck?"

"I said damn and fucking, but close enough."

Sarah stood and picked up her portfolio. "Please, don't encourage him…he really does enjoy his flirting and finger painting and he does drink that battery acid they call coffee way too much. I think it might have rotted his brain a bit." She smiled. "You call me when or if you want to talk. Okay?"

Lindsay nodded and glanced at Greg, but he wasn't moving yet.

"Oh, he has his spiel yet, he'll catch up with me. I'll wait to hear from you then." Sarah waved and was gone.

Lindsay sat back and waited. "So, I suppose you want to save my soul?"

His eyebrows furrowed and he shook his head before he crossed his arms over his chest. "Why would I be trying to do that?"

She was confused now. "Well…um you're a chaplain, isn't that your job? It's what my grandmother's priest always tried to do."

He snorted. "Do I look like a priest, pastor, Rabbi or any other church leader?"

"No, which is why I'm confused about you being a chaplain." She said the words slowly as if talking to a small child.

"Look girlfriend, I'm here to see if you need any help with faith. That's it. You know, your faith…not mine or anyone else's. I don't care what you believe in. I don't care if you believe in the great god Cthulhu or if you're a member of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster as long as you believe in something. Something that brings you peace, makes you happy and gives you look forward to. It can be family, your friends, love, even your future, but you have to have faith in something." He smiled at her. "Some people lose that faith when they live through something bad like you did. It crushes their love, takes away their connection to friends and family or you know silences their psychic connection with Cthulhu or the Spaghetti Monster…" He winked. "I'm here to make sure you find it, or it finds you again."

She nodded at him. She liked him, even if she had no clue what a Spaghetti Monster or Cthulhu was. "I have my family, mom, dad, brother and mom's boyfriend Nico." She pulled the coat up and then the light saber closer. "Nico, he's the one who found me, saved me." She smiled. "I've got a lot of faith in him. Then my brother, he helped them figure out where to find me." She lit up the light saber. "He's protected me from when I was little and he's still doing a good job of it. Dad, he sat up with me and kept the bad dreams away last night just like when I was little. He'll keep fighting for me now." She looked at Greg and wiped her face. "Mom, well she fights hard for me every day in here. She'd tackle you and she's tiny, but she's vicious. That's who I have faith in."

Greg smiled and stood. "My work here is done. See, I'm awesome at my job. Now, on to finger painting with toddlers and then more flirting with the cute ones like you…" he slid a business card onto her over bed table and then pointed at it before he headed to the door, "so, you feel free to look me up in a year or two." He winked and started whistling something that sounded like Metallica's One as he walked into the hall.

Ray Jay and her father walked in carrying coffee and a bag of bagels right after, crossing paths with the man as they went.

Ray Jay pointed at the door. "What the heck was that?"

Lindsay shook her head and giggled. "The chaplain."

Her father blustered and started for the door, sure that he was lying and security needed notified.

"Dad, dad…really…he left his card and he came with the hospital psychologist who vouched for him. He had a badge and the nurse introduced him. He was legit. He's just…um odd, but I liked him."

Her father looked at her. "Odd, he looked like he needed to be in jail, or had been in jail."

Ray Jay pulled a bagel from the bag and handed it to Lindsay along with a café mocha. "Hey, he looked cool as hell. I'd go to church more often if people like him were in it."

"I'm not sure he goes to church, unless it's the Church of the Spaghetti Monster." She snorted and held up a hand when her father gave her a funny look. "I swear he said it, not me and to be fair, um the guys who put me in here shopped at Abercrombie on a bad day."

Her father frowned. She was right. He frowned and sipped his coffee. "Where the hell is your mother? My neck is killing me from that damn chair."

"I don't know, but I'm sure she'll be here soon. It's almost eight thirty." Lindsay tried not to smile. She knew he was just tired. He hadn't slept and he got that way when he didn't sleep. "How's the coffee dad?"

"It's good baby, how's yours?" He sipped and rubbed his neck but at least he was quiet now.

"Not as good as the coffee shop close to home, but better than the cafeteria, so thanks."

"They didn't have cinnamon bagels, so I hope the chocolate chip one is good." He sat back in the chair and tried to get comfortable again when his phone rang.

"Carla what is it?...No, I said I would be home before I went to work, but I'd be going to work late today….for the love of….what the hell is wrong with you that you don't understand things? No, I will be there soon, then I am going to work, then I will be home from work and I will probably come back here and see Lindsay again….Why? Because she's my fucking daughter you idiot and she's in the goddamn hospital. I'll talk to you when I get there. When I get home Carla…Whenever Dani gets here. I don't know, soon." He hung up in exasperation and with a growl. He glared at the phone in his hand.

Dani was at the door. "Ray, are you alright?" She asked quietly from behind him.

"Shit Danielle, you scared me." He stood quickly and turned to face her. He held up his phone. "I ah…she's angry that I stayed away. I think she thinks I'm with you."

Dani's eyebrows rose. "Oh." She shook her head. "Well, there's video surveillance at the house proving I went home with someone else if she really wants it." She glanced at the kids. "How was last night?"

Ray frowned. "She didn't do really well. Bad dreams, lots of tossing and turning and talk about men hurting her."

"Men? More than one?" Dani moved around Ray to the bed. "You remember something?"

Lindsay gasped. She didn't remember saying anything, but obviously she had, probably while she was half asleep or still asleep. She shrugged. "Not really, I mean I remember something about there being other people…" she glanced at Ray Jay and her dad and looked away from them, blushed and looked down as tears filled her eyes. She pulled the coat that she'd half forgotten, up by her head again. Her voice got low and she grabbed her mother's hand. "They did things…god mom…"

Dani's heart clenched and she stopped breathing for a second or two. She looked back at her ex-husband. "Follow Ray Jay to the house for me and make sure he gets in okay?"

He nodded. "Sure, it's on the way home anyway. Come on, say goodbye to your sister." He moved to his daughter's bedside and hugged her. "Love you pumpkin. You get better and I'll see you later. Okay? Hopefully, you'll be in that rehab side and then you go home right?"

She nodded, her lip between her teeth. "Yea, that's what they say anyway."

"Good, good, then I'll see you later." He kissed her head and stood.

Ray Jay hugged her. "Love ya Linds." He pushed the button on the light saber and smiled. "May the force be with you." Then he hugged Dani. "Love you too mom."

"Thanks honey, make sure you lock up and set the alarm." She looked up at him. "Understood?"

"Yea, totally." He rolled his eyes.

Dani sat down and took a deep breath. She looked at her daughter. "Lindsay, I need to tell you something, but before I do, tell me about when you woke up."

Lindsay nodded, okay she could do that, but she looked around. "Where's Nico?"

"He had to go to his apartment to get something, so he dropped me here first. He'll be a little while, so it's just us for a bit, okay?"

"Okay." She looked at her mom and pulled Nico's coat up to her face. She spread it out over her chest and pulled it up to her chin. "I was in a room and on a bed. When I first woke up I just thought I was at home or something. I was confused, like when you wake up from a dream or you've been sick or something. I didn't feel right. I lifted my head up and was so dizzy and sick, my head hurt. I got sick. I knew someone had undressed me. My clothes were off, except my panties and cami, but my bra was gone…so…so." She started losing control a little and stopped to pull the coat closer. She even lifted the light saber.

Dani nodded at her. "You're doing good Linds." She took her hand. "Do you remember anything from before then?"

She squinted and rubbed her head. "That's what I tried to do then and now, that's what I think I was remembering last night, but it doesn't make sense. I mean not really."

"Your dad said you mentioned men…what men and what were they doing?"

She shivered. "Mom…" Her voice was a gasp more than anything. "I'm not sure, most of it is fuzzy…I don't know. I think Tyler and Ken. I think oh god mom, I don't even want to remember it…but I felt like I couldn't breathe…" she was crying now, "I was on my back, someone was holding my nose and face so someone else could pour something in my mouth…but, god mom…"

Dani gasped and shook her head, she moved to sit beside her daughter and pulled her against her chest. Lindsay didn't need to finish for her to know what she was going to say. "Was it Ken standing over you baby?" She was crying with her daughter now. "That's all we need to know so we can tell the police and they can put him back in jail."

Lindsay nodded. "Yes, oh god mom and I can't get the thought of it out of my head and I keep gagging and throwing up…they made me swallow it…mom god.." She started gagging again, but didn't throw up. She pressed her face into her mother's shoulder. "Mom, why? Why me?"

Dani pulled back and pushed Lindsay's hair over her shoulder. "I don't know why you baby." She shook her head. "I don't know and I can't explain why people do things to hurt other people." She took a deep breath. "I need to tell you something though. They did that because someone wanted a video Lindsay."

The girl stopped and pulled away from her mother. She sat up and started. "There's a video? Of me?" She shook her head and big fat tears ran down her face. "Mom no…I can't do that…it will be everywhere. If you know that means it's already somewhere else…oh god. I can't do school ever again." She started sobbing.

Dani wished there was something she could do, something she could say, but there wasn't. All she could do was lie in her daughter's bed and hold her and cry along with her. She pulled Nico's coat over them both and kissed her as she whispered how much she loved her against her hair.

That was how Nico found them. Mother and daughter tucked against each other with his coat spread over them. He smiled as he closed the door behind him. He approached the bed quietly and then frowned as he realized that they'd been crying.

He gently touched Dani's shoulder and she opened her eyes. She lifted a hand to grasp his and then slid slowly from the bed so she didn't disturb her daughter.

Lindsay moved and then resettled fitfully.

Nico took a second to brush the hair from her face and tuck the coat around her a bit more securely. She looked worried in her rest, even though yesterday she hadn't. He looked to Dani and then moved with her from the bed.

"What happened?" He motioned toward Lindsay.

Dani pulled a tissue from the box on the wall and wiped at what she was sure was messy eye makeup even as she leaned into Nico's chest. She felt better having him here. "She remembered something last night. Things are starting to breakthrough from when she was drugged…it wasn't good, but she says she remembers Ken being there." She turned and pressed into him and then wrapped her arms around him. When she did her hand hit hard metal along his left side. She pulled back. "What the hell Nico?"

He pulled her hands from his chest. "It's just a precaution Dani. I don't want a repeat of last time. Ken is out and we really don't know for how long, so until he's back under lock and key." He lifted his jacket, let her see the holster and then dropped the jacket again. "I'm going to be sure everyone is safe."

She swallowed. He'd always made sure they were safe. Always and he'd never needed a gun before. "We've been safe and guns weren't involved." She didn't know what to think. She'd never seen him with a gun and she really didn't know why when most of his employees carried one. "Do you really think that's necessary?"

He looked her in the eye and Dani swore there was something there she'd never seen before; fear. "Like I said, it's just a precaution Dani. I never hope violence is necessary, but I'm always prepared for it if it is."

She hesitated and then nodded. "You have a permit for that?"

He nodded. "Of course I do, but let's not discuss too much about it here. I probably shouldn't have it in the hospital."

"Okay." She crossed her arms. "So, Lindsay says she remembers Ken being there and doing certain things to her."

Nico nodded. "Good, I'll let Ben know and they can pick him up. Hopefully they'll have him back behind bars before dark." He kept his eyes on Dani. "You know they're going to need to talk to her. This isn't going to be easy and they're going to want details Danielle. Every intimate detail she can give and then they'll ask her to tell it to them four more times."

"I don't know if she can do it." She looked over at her daughter. "I told her about the video, that's why she broke down." She sniffed and hugged herself. "Shit, what the hell did they do to her Nico?"

He shook his head. "I don't know Dani. You know more than me at this point. I didn't see the video." He stepped toward her and pulled her against his chest again. "I'm sorry baby. I wish it didn't happen or that I could make it go away."

"Me too…"

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It was just after noon as he stood in the hallway and waited. Mostly because he just didn't know what to do. He felt caged in and frustrated. He didn't want what was coming. He felt the heavy weight against his chest and it felt like a brand, or some sort of accusation. He wished it would stop dragging his thoughts back in time. He looked up when the elevator doors opened and Ben and his partner stepped out.

He pushed away from the wall and met them partway up the hall.

"So, she remembered something?" Ben asked, hands in his pockets.

Sheila glanced at Nico and nodded.

He acknowledged her and answered. "Her mother says she remembered the Ken kid being there and participating in certain activities. They haven't filled me in."

Ben's eyebrow shot up. "So, you have no idea what's on the video?"

Nico crossed his arms and straightened his posture. "What exactly are you insinuating Ben?"

Sheila cleared her throat. "Hey boys, can we get back to the girl…" She looked from one man to the other and then back to Nico. "I'm sure he wasn't insinuating anything, were you Ben?"

Ben kept his eyes on Nico, but shook his head. "Of course not."

"Good, so how about we talk to the girl and find out what she knows?" She left the men in the hall and moved into the room.

"I didn't watch the video Carson. I haven't even been tempted." Nico glared at the man.

Ben watched Nico's face. He believed him. "Good, you know we're still going to have problems using her testimony right?"

Nico nodded and sighed. He knew. She'd been drugged. The DA would accept it, but they knew the defense would almost certainly get it tossed for that reason. She'd be considered an unreliable witness, even to her own assault. And honestly, she was. His eyes moved to Ben's. "I know, but it's what we have. Right?" His tone was caustic.

"Yes, it's what we have." He nodded to Nico's shoulder. "You don't usually carry. What gives?"

"I'm not taking any chances this time. That's all." He shrugged.

"I understand man. You do what you need to. I would do the same for my family." He joined his partner in the room.

Nico stood by the door and watched. He tried not to listen, but unfortunately, he heard enough to turn his stomach. Ben was right. He didn't need to watch the video. He needed to hurt the people who made it. He pulled his phone from his pocket and dialed.

"Tommy, meet me out here at the hospital. I need you to run security for me while I run a few errands."


	24. Dystopian Confusion

**_NOTE:_**The usual applies...yadda and yadda. Thanks to all who read and review, I appreciate as always and if I didn't comment to you, don't take that personal. That is simply because of my personal stuff...I still love the comments and read them all. I just spent my time doing my edit/rewrites. So, I hope you enjoy and let me know what you think if you want. If not, that's always cool too. **  
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Oh, there is a long flashback in here and I don't write flashbacks often, so...don't hate me.

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**Dystopian Confusion**

Juliette sat on her bed with one earbud in her ear and the music on, she wasn't really listening and if someone asked her what she was listening to she would have to pause to actually pay attention or glance at the play list. She had her journal on her lap. She had written some and was doodling in the margin now as she worried about Lindsay. She sighed.

"Knock…knock…" there was a knock at her door as well.

She smiled. "It's open TK."

The door opened slowly and he poked his head inside. "Hey blondie." He smiled wide and pulled the chair from the small desk. He turned it around and straddled it. "What's up and how's it hanging?"

She rolled her eyes and pulled the lonely earbud from her ear. She motioned to her journal, "You know writing out my feelings like we're supposed to…" She rolled her eyes at him. "You're always done so fast, what the hell is up with that by the way?"

He shrugged. "Don't have much to write really." He pulled a throw pillow from her bed and tossed it up in the air, caught it and repeated it again sending the pillow in a spiral as before it landed in his hands. "I kinda write the same shit over and over…grateful to be alive…glad I'm sober…be happy when I'll be playing again." He watched the pillow spin and caught it on his fingertips, let it roll and then caught it with his other hand. He smiled like he'd done something special.

"Oh, guess I actually try then." She bit at the end of her pen. "I can't stand being in her, but this is the best place I've been." She smiled shyly.

TK made a face and glanced around her room. "Seriously?" He leaned closer to her, now rolling the pillow around his palm, "I mean the accommodations are great compared to the standards down the hall." He pointed with a frown. "But I figured you'd been in some seriously nicer places."

"I have if you're talking about thread counts, gourmet meals, massage and personal trainers, but I've always been to those places and spent my days alone, or alienated myself." She looked him in the eye. "I've never had a friend on the inside…no one like you." She gave him a serious look. "I mean it. Having you here with me, it's meant a lot." She shrugged. "It means a lot. And now, with Lindsay going through all that shit…she doesn't deserve any of it." She wiped her eyes.

TK frowned. "No one does. That shit is just wrong." He stopped playing with the pillow. "I like Dr. Dani's kids."

"Yea, no one does, but it wasn't like it was for me with Linds." She glanced down at her notebook. "I mean, with me…I knew the shit I was getting into. Nothing those shit heads did to me was a surprise. Hell, I'd done all of it and more, but fuck…" She looked up at him. "Lindsay was still a virgin and now…she has to deal with knowing that there might be a fucking video?!"

He blinked and swallowed. "There's a video? You? Her?" He paled and the pillow fell from his hand.

Shit, maybe she shouldn't have said anything. "Damn, don't say anything…I probably shouldn't have mentioned that." She closed her journal and set it aside. "Me, yes and I did it because I needed drugs and I knew what I was doing. Still, the shit makes you feel bad, but I knew what was going on. Hell, most of the girls on those videos do it for exactly the same reason."

He snorted and shook his head. "Fuck, there's no way…girls love that shit. At least the girls in the videos I watch." He gave her a killer smile. "I'm telling you. They love what's going on." His eyebrows went up and down.

She glared. "I'm sure there're girls that do, but I'm telling you that I know girls, lots of girls in those videos." She pushed hair out of face and tucked some behind her ears. "I know them, was there with some of them and plenty of them, just like me were doing it for drugs, or money to buy drugs or they were so fucked up on the drugs that they would let those guys do anything they wanted without complaint."

TK shivered and made a disgusted face. "I'm never watching porn again."

"Whatever." She giggled. "That'll last until tonight right before they shut the routers off." She rolled her eyes.

He stood and moved to sit on the bed. "Nah, really…If it means that much." He took her hand. "I wouldn't want do something to hurt you Jules, really."

Her eyebrows pulled together and she squeezed his hand. "If you do ever see my video, don't watch it…and never Lindsay's."

He shook his head and he reached up to re-tuck the hair that had fallen from behind her ear. "Babygirl, I'd never do that." He crossed his heart. "Never." He swallowed and looked her in the eye. He noticed the way she was leaning a bit closer, so he leaned in as well.

Juliette liked him. He was sexy as hell and he didn't treat her special, which she liked. Her breath caught in her throat, just a bit. She leaned in as he did and her eyes dropped to his mouth. Her tongue darted out. The tip of her tongue took one easy slide across her bottom lip.

TK watched her eyes lower and then he watched as her tongue moved slowly over her lip and he knew he had this locked. His pulse kicked up and tried not to smile. He liked this girl, he didn't care who the hell she was. He tilted his head, leaned in and his hand slid to the back of her neck just as his lips brushed lightly over hers.

SLAP…her journal fell to the tile with a loud sound.

Juliette jumped back.

TK pulled away. "Um…wow, maybe yea…" He cleared his throat and stood. "It's about time for group." He moved to the door. "I'll see you there."

Juliette watched him go. Her breathing was labored and she smiled. She flopped back on her pillows. She was still worried about Lindsay, but rehab just got way more interesting.

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Nico was leaning against the wall by the nurses' station. This gave him a clear view of both the room and the elevator. He had his arms crossed over his chest and his thoughts kept jumping between the past and the present. He didn't want to think about those things, but there was no way around them. His jaw pressed together and he took a deep breath to refocus on here and now. That just pushed his thoughts on to what he felt he might have to do; to what he wanted to do. God, what those boys had done to her; what they'd done to Juliette. His eyes slid shut and anger burned in his gut and rage ran through his blood. The need to hurt, the need to be violent and get revenge ran through him like a drug. He knew that feeling and the rush of adrenaline that came with it fired his mind and blood like nothing else. That rush just pushed him back to the past again and round and round his thoughts went again. He cursed himself and tried to focus on his water garden, but the fountains were flowing with blood and there was no scent of jasmine, but something else instead.

He heard the elevator and opened his eyes to see Tommy exit. He shook his head, dropped his arms and pushed from the wall. He waited for the other man to join him.

The slightly smaller man eyed him. He noticed the set of his jaw, the tension and something else he hadn't seen in quite some time. "Nico, what's going on man?" He glanced toward Lindsay's room. He saw the officers with Dr. Santino. "What's with the interrogation?"

Nico followed his eyes and he sighed. "She remembered a few things." He pushed a hand through his hair. "About the driver…and things that happened while she was drugged." He swallowed the lump in his throat. "They're taking her statement and you know, pretty much all around pulling every fucking detail from her."

Tommy eyed him. "So, they're doing their job." He had already noticed the way his boss was holding himself. "What's with the hardware?" He motioned to Nico's left shoulder.

"Just a precaution." He nodded to the room. "You saw what happened the last time one of those fuckers got out. With the Ellis kid out, I'm not taking any chances." His eyes moved to Tommy's with cold determination.

The other man saw the look and knew it. Hell, he'd lived it. "I know why you don't carry anymore." He paused and looked Nico dead in the eye. "I'm not saying that means you don't have a reason to worry, or a right to do what you want." He shifted and leaned a shoulder into the wall. "Fuck, I wish I would have done damage to that asshole, but are you sure this is what you want?"

"Don't think you know what I want Tommy." He glared. "All I did was strap the weapon on. I didn't pull it, and I sure as hell didn't fire it."

"Not the point and you know it." The other man shook his head. "You and I both know what that means." He took a step closer. "Tell me you haven't been thinking about it?"

Nico sighed. "Stay here and watch, that's all you have to do; nothing else." He started toward the elevators. "I'll be back."

"When?"

"When this is done." Nico pushed the down button.

"What do I tell Dr. Dani?"

"The truth," he glanced toward the room and then back to Tommy. "That I'm running errands. That's what I called you in for and that's the truth. I have several things to do."

Tommy didn't push him any further. He probably did have several places to be. "Fine, but I'm going on record; I don't agree with this and I don't like it."

The elevator doors opened and Nico nodded. "So noted, keep them safe for me Tommy."

"I promise you that boss." He shook his head. "Good hunting."

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The detectives had a digital recorder on the small table and they asked Lindsay the same questions over and over. Dani figured her molars were grinding down to dust as she struggled to keep quiet. She sat in the chair beside her daughter and held her hand. She struggled not to cry, but there were times that she'd failed. Lindsay gripped her hand desperately under the cover of the heavy dark wool of Nico's coat over and over and Dani was probably just as grateful for the grounding influence of that touch, if not more so, than her daughter.

She turned her head away so the detectives wouldn't see the disgust on her face while they pulled some even more vile memory from her daughter's subconscious. She understood the reasons, she knew that they needed this information and as a therapist she even knew it was a good thing for her daughter to acknowledge that it happened, but as a mother…she did not want to know these things. She was hurting, she was breaking for her daughter. No one should have had to suffer this way.

She glanced at Lindsay and saw she was losing control. She stood.

"That's enough." Her voice was calm, direct and in total control. It was a complete dichotomy to how she felt inside. She reached over and pushed the stop button on the digital recorder on the table. "My daughter has been answering questions for the past hour and a half. She's tired, she's emotionally spent and she's given you more than enough information to arrest Kenny Ellis." She glared at Detectives Carson and Roberts. "So, go do your job."

Ben swallowed and nodded. "I think we have enough for now." He looked at Lindsay. "You did really well Miss Santino and by the way, I'm not sure if anyone told you, but Tyler's nose is broken and he's going to need surgery to ever breathe through it again." He winked at her. "I hear you were responsible for that." His eyebrow rose.

Lindsay wiped her teary eyes and she shrugged. "I wasn't going to let him do what he was about to do…god…" She shook her head and scooted closer to her mother. "I slammed the back of my head into his nose and ran. It's how I got away." The coat was pulled to her face. "Can you leave now please? I'm really tired."

Sheila put a hand on Ben's arm. "Thanks for your help Lindsay. We'll let you know just as soon as we have him back in custody." She nodded at Dani. "Dr. Santino, thank you."

Dani nodded. "Just get him."

Dani watched the detectives leave and then she turned to Lindsay. She was curled in a ball, her face was wet with tears and her eyes were pressed shut so tight. Dani was shocked to see her this way. She hadn't up until this point been this way except for initially the night they found her. She stroked a hand over her head and down her back. "Oh baby I'm so damn sorry." She let her own tears fall.

Lindsay sobbed and wrapped an arm around her mother's waist, pressed her face into her mother's side and cried like she hadn't yet. A dam had broken and she didn't know what happened, but everything was washing over her now. She felt she was drowning in things she thought she had under control. Pain, anger, fear, shame, all of it at the same time just rolled through her and she didn't know which one to think about first. She sobbed and wondered if she'd ever feel like she had any control again.

Dani didn't know what to do. She completely understood what was going on. She'd expected this at some point. Lindsay had been almost too strong up to this point. She knew she'd only been pushing her emotions down, avoiding the strongest and at some point she'd have to face them. Hell, Dani had probably helped her do it. She wiped her face and tucked hair behind Lindsay's ear as she whispered reassurances to her daughter. The problem was Dani was in the middle and when the emotions affect you, and you feel them just as strongly, it's hard to help. She couldn't be objective. She couldn't help Lindsay talk through them because she needed to talk through them herself.

She knew Nico had stayed out of the room because he didn't want to hear, but surely he saw the detectives leave, so she couldn't help but wonder where the hell he was. She wanted him here with her now. Shit, she really needed him here with her now. She could use his quiet strength. He could be on the phone, or maybe he ran to grab them some coffee from the café. She could use some coffee by now and he usually knew when she needed it. She smiled and gently massaged Lindsay's shoulders. She felt her relax under her hands.

She glanced down and realized she was falling asleep. She had exhausted herself. She said she hadn't slept well and then after the emotional morning and the crying, she'd worn herself out. Dani lowered the bed to a better sleep position and tucked a pillow under her head so she wouldn't wake with a stiff neck. She watched her settle a bit onto the pillow and then she pulled the sheet over her and tucked the coat up over her as well. She brushed the hair from her face and kissed her.

"I love you Linds. No matter what they did to you. You didn't deserve it and you're still who you are. You aren't dirty or damaged baby." She whispered it against her hair. "You're still perfect and no one can take away what you didn't give away. That's still yours." She kissed her temple and then stood wiping her own eyes. "I'm so sorry baby…" She pressed a hand to her lips and then pulled a tissue from the box. She noticed rape counseling pamphlets and a counselor's card tucked beneath the box.

She pulled the information from under it and a card for the hospital chaplain came along with it. She'd obviously missed their visit and she wished she hadn't. She would have liked to have spoken with the counselor herself. She slid the cards to the side. Maybe she could track the woman's office down. She glanced at her daughter. She seemed to be sleeping soundly, so she slipped into the hall to check on Nico.

She glanced down the hall toward the sitting area near the vending machines and then toward the elevators and sighed when she didn't see him immediately. She walked toward the vending area figuring she needed to get out of the room for a few minutes.

"Dr. Dani you okay?"

She turned when she heard her name. "Tommy? What are you doing here?"

He smiled from his seat in the corner. He still had a clear view of everything, but was basically unseen. He stood and stretched. "Nico called me a couple hours ago and asked me to come take his place on guard duty." He rolled his neck rather violently and it made a cracking sound, which made him smile. "He said he had some errands to run."

She frowned and her lips slid from a thin line to a frown as her hands settled to her hips. "And he didn't bother to tell me, call me, text me?" She squinted at him. "Is there something you aren't telling me Tommy?"

He held his hands up and shook his head. "Look Dani, he's a stubborn ass sometimes. He's angry, he's frustrated and he's hurting…" his eyebrow rose suggesting something more, "you know about the extra weight he's carrying today?"

If Dani's eyes could have narrowed more they would have. "What are you trying to say?"

"I'm not saying anything at all." He shook his head. "He said he was running errands. He doesn't lie, so if that's what he says, then that's what he's doing. He didn't give me any other information, but he heard what Lindsay told you about what the Ellis kid did and…" His eyes were on hers and he shrugged. "You need to know something. He hasn't carried a firearm since he returned from active duty. Not once since he stepped foot on US soil. That weapon, I'll bet my retirement that it's the same weapon he locked away and swore he'd never touch again. That's a story that you probably need to hear to understand what's going on in his head, but we don't have time. What you need to know is that when the boss wants precautions," he touched his shoulder, "he calls me or Xeno or Ronnie, so precaution my ass." He shook his head. "This isn't about insurances."

Dani gasped and. "It's about…" but she didn't finish.

Tommy did. "Revenge Dani…his past and revenge."

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Nico drove to the kid's house and watched. It didn't take long for the kid to leave, which surprised him some. He actually thought he wouldn't get a chance and this would be an exercise in futility. He figured he'd sit and the police would show before the kid would, but luck, fate, karma or god was on his side. Kenneth Ellis glanced down the block and then got into a Ford Fusion and pulled out of the drive. Nico waited a beat and then followed.

The kid wasn't hard to track and it was easy trail him to the gym. Nico shook his head, the kid was stupid. He should be sticking with a low profile, not working out at the gym. Nico's keen eye had spotted the cameras in the lot, so he didn't pull in, but instead parked across the street. He waited and then followed the kid to his next stop. This one was better suited to Nico's needs. The small tobacco shop was in a seedy part of town that had only street parking. There were no traffic cameras nearby either. Nico parked a few places above the kid, luckily he chose the direction the kid was planning to go. When Ken walked past, he simply leaned in, twisted the kid's arm and forced him into the front seat of his car.

"Don't move Ken." He buckled the kid into the seat, making sure the kid saw the gun. He climbed in the driver's side and took the kid's phone, which he put in his pocket. Then he checked his pockets for weapons, pulled a small pocket knife out and put that in his own pocket as well. "You just need to sit there while we take a little ride. Okay?" Then he handcuffed his right wrist to the door. "Don't do anything stupid either."

Ken started at him. "You a cop?"

Nico smiled. "Do I look like a cop?"

The kid shrugged and pouted. "Sorta."

Nico exited the car, shoved two more quarters into the kid's meter, pushing the meter to the max of three hours and then he got behind the wheel and drove.

Ken eyed the guy. "I'm under arrest again? That bitch accuse me of something?" He snorted, "She was drugged and those brothers did that. I told you guys that. They just asked me to drive man, that's all…this was all squared away and I don't know a thing about a fucking video. Talk to my lawyer." He yanked on the cuffs that held his right hand. "Anyway we can loosen these things?"

Nico didn't even think, his hand flew and his fist landed square against the kid's jaw as they sat at a stop sign. The kid slumped loose in the seat. "You call her a bitch again and you won't have teeth left in your mouth."

Ken looked up at him dazed and definitely confused. He lifted his free hand to his face and touched it. "Oh, what the hell?" He worked his jaw gingerly. "I'm filing charges, I want your badge number." He sat up and pulled the visor down and flipped the vanity mirror open to see his face.

"What it's okay for you to hit your girlfriends? You can hit Libby Wingate, but can't take it?" Nico took a turn and hit the gas. "Only cowards hit women that way. What? Can't get it up? Take it out on someone smaller than you?"

Ken snorted. "You need to stop listening to women man, they all lie. Libby's a lying bitch too."

Nico growled.

Ken cowered in the seat beside him. "Dude, like you don't know what I'm talking about. All women, every fucking one of them, I don't see a ring on your finger." He snorted again, "Figure you're divorced so you know what I mean. They lie man…tell you they want you and cheat on you. They deserve what they get. Libby did, little whore was cheating behind my back."

Nico bit his tongue. "Really? And what about the Santino girl then? What she do to deserve those Harper boys and you?"

He smiled and licked his lips. He shrugged. "Tyler said she was a big cock tease, led him on and then shut him down. That shit just ain't right. You don't do that to a guy." He leered. "You don't rev me up and then tell me no at the last second. So, he wanted to teach her a lesson. Make sure everyone knew she wasn't as pure as she pretended she was. You know?" He laughed. "So, we made sure she couldn't say a few things. Nothing like a mouthful of hot…"

Nico's fist landed for a second time and this time the kid was silent. He slumped forward against the seatbelt as a trickle of blood ran from the corner of his lip and a snoring sound came from his mouth.

Nico shook out his hand and glanced at the broken skin on his knuckles with a smile as a thrill went through him. It felt good. It felt really good. He pressed the gas pedal and pushed the Lincoln's speedometer over eighty. His doubts started to fade. This kid was evil, just as evil as the others, just as evil as the shit in his past. He didn't do his job in the past and someone who relied on him had died. That wasn't going to happen again.

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_**Location: Undisclosed Time: Undisclosed **_

Nico glanced up from the maps and rechecked the coordinates. He shook his head. No, he wasn't mistaken they really were in the fucking middle of a damn village and that's where they were supposed to be. Their orders were clear too; clear it of all human occupants. Those orders were simple. No survivors, no witnesses. Interrogate on sight and then eliminate. The problem was, this wasn't an outpost, a camp, a rebel holdout or anything else he could justify the orders for. It was a fucking village. He looked back over his shoulder and held up a fist. The men behind him stopped and he made a circle with his finger and pointed back the way they'd come, indicating that he wanted them to circle back and regroup at their predetermined location.

The men slipped silently back the way they'd come and back up into the surrounding hills. He broke the silence.

"Anyone else see a problem?" He pulled his canteen out and took a sip. He may be in charge, but he listened to his men.

Parker shrugged and fiddled with his weapon. "You know how I look at it. You know as well as I do that they use villages for cover, schools, hospitals, mosques and they don't care." He patted at his pockets for his cigarettes. "They strap bombs to their women, their kids and they don't give a fuck who dies. So, if we're supposed to clear the entire village we do it."

Nico looked to Marshall, but Marshall was snoring already. He rolled his eyes and nudged him with his foot. "Pittman, hey wake the hell up. Give me your take on this man."

Marshall smiled, he really wasn't sleeping. He was just trying to piss his friend off. He held his hand out to Parker for a cigarette. He waited for him to give him one and when he resisted he kicked him. "Man, I won't share my hash later, so you better let me mooch now if you wanna mooch later."

Parker cursed and then flung one at him.

Marshall caught it with a cocky smile and set it between his lips before he pulled a butane lighter from his pocket. He lit up and then offered to light Parker's, who took the offer. Once he took a drag he looked at Nico, "Well, I'm not a big fan of killing women and children." He shook his head and blew a plume of smoke over his head. "I'm even less of a fan of letting the rest of our brother's in arms getting blown to bits when they follow behind me because we didn't do our job." He took another hit and kept the cigarette between his lips when he spoke. "The intel is good. The rebels are here, the IEDs are coming from here. The village is cover man. They don't think we'll do it that's why they're here." He pulled hard on the cigarette and then passed it to Nico.

Nico took it. God he didn't want to do this. He knew everything they said was right. He knew. They had orders, but it felt wrong. He'd glanced in the windows. There were babies here; mothers and babies, toddlers, kids and dogs. He counted seven houses. He let the acrid smoke fill his lungs and then exhaled slowly. He looked at the last person in their small advanced team. "What about you Rosado?"

Rosado was the youngest in the group and he looked up at Nico and swallowed. He looked a little green around the gills at the prospect. "I don't like it." He glanced down the hill back toward the village. "There're babies man, little ones. I have one at home." He flipped over his map and inside the plastic there was a picture of a newborn. "I haven't even met her yet." He traced the picture of the wrinkled, swollen face with his thumb. "We called her Camila Grace." His voice was far away. He looked up and shook his head. "I'm not cool with killing the little ones."

"Shit, me either kid." Nico took another drag on the cigarette and passed what was left back to Marshall. "Orders are clear." He scratched up under his helmet where the sweat had started to form and drip. "I counted seven houses, the small school or mosque and then the area they're using for the animals. We should search the school. If they're building IEDs that's where they're probably doing it, there or the barn area." He glanced at the others. He pointed to Marshall and Rosado. "You two check the barn. Parker and me, we'll check the school. Two clicks on the radio if you find what we're looking for."

Marshall nodded and tapped Rosado on the shoulder. "So, if we find it?"

"If you find it, notify us and we come to you. We find it, you come to us. Once we hit the village it's ten minutes, if neither of us hear find anything in that amount of time then we rendezvous at the east end by that bend in the goat path there." He pointed down the hill to the path barely visible in the mostly full moon.

Marshall stubbed out the cigarette. "Okay, let's go see what they're building down there then." He nudged Rosado ahead of him as he raised his weapon. "See ya on the other side brother." He held up his fist and nudged Nico's shoulder.

Nico did the same as the man went by. They'd somehow forged a close bond. He considered him a brother at this point. "Good hunting."

"Same to you." Rosado said as he went by. He crossed himself. "God be with you."

Parker rolled his eyes and stood from his squatting position. "I like the kid, but he's soft."

Nico gave Parker a hard look. "He's fine. Leave him be. I don't like it either Josh." He shouldered his weapon and checked his sidearm. "Let's get this done."

They moved silently down the path to the village. It was quiet, well after midnight and with the exception for the a few animal sounds, they heard nothing. Parker frowned and gave Nico a head shake. The school door was locked. It shouldn't have been if this was a simple village school, or even a mosque. There shouldn't be anything in a village this size worth stealing from one.

Nico slid beside him. He kept his voice low, and quiet. "Booby trapped?"

Parker raised an eyebrow. He pulled a red LED flash light from his pocket and while Nico slid behind him, weapon raised and ready, Parker shined the light through the crack in the door. He looked for any obvious signs of tampering. Things like trip wires or switches. He didn't see anything. He glanced back and shook his head.

He slid his knife in the lock and it didn't take long to open it. It may be locked, but it wasn't a strong lock.

Nico looked around and then the men ducked inside. At first glance the room was simply a school. Benches lined the walls, books on a shelf and a chalk board. The men raised an eyebrow and tapped a foot on the floor because there was a rug. There was obviously something below them. Nico tapped the radio and sent two clicks to the other men as Parker rolled back the rug. Nico's own red LED flashlight now out and put to work. He had to admit, the rug was beautiful work. The people in this village had nothing, but the rug in their mosque would sell for ten thousand dollars in the states. He shook his head.

There was a sound at the door, Nico flipped his light off and both men turned, weapons up and readied.

The door opened slowly and the glint of metal slid into the room ahead of any person. Then Marshall's voice hissed quietly into the room. "Careles if you shoot my ass, I'll kill you." More of the gun barrel slid into view. "So both of you take your fingers off the motherfucking triggers you cock sucking pieces of shit."

"Lower your weapon Parker." Nico said with a smile in his voice.

The barrel in the doorway lowered and Pittman and Rosado slid into view and then the door closed behind them. Pittman leaned against it with a cocky grin on his face. "I'm glad your Frog Hog paid attention to you." He raised his eyebrow at Parker. "I'd hate to have to shoot such a pretty little thing." He made a kissing face at the other man.

Parker flipped him off. "You're the one who likes to be on his knees Pittman." He started thrusting his hips. "Take it Marsha, oh baby…take it all." He made a blowjob motion with his mouth.

Rosado's arm was suddenly against Marshall's chest. "Don't listen to him and you started this shit." He sighed and looked at Nico. "What you find?"

Nico kicked the rug back a bit more and nudged at the sunken handle it revealed. "Seems we found ourselves hidey-hole boys." He bent to assess the doorway. "Looks clear," He looked up at his men. "You ready? Could be anything down there."

Pittman glanced at the others and then pulled his respirator from his side. "I say we mask up, drop some gas and go in under cover, just in case."

Parker nodded. "Sounds legit to me." He pulled his mask out and nodded to Rosado to do the same. "Not that I love pulling the torture hat on, but fuck it's better than going in blind."

"I agree." Nico grabbed his, and yanked it into place. He pointed to Rosado since he was their munitions expert. "You have the canister?" When the younger man nodded, he held up his hand. "Okay then on three, I open the door, you drop the canister. Then we wait another three and we breach. Clear?"

The other three men all answered, "Aye Chief."

Nico nodded and pulled the door open. He dropped his fingers and then the canister dropped. Their masks were on and when he got to five they were glad they dropped he canister. There were sounds in the hole of men coughing and calling to each other in surprise. They all knew enough of the language to understand that they were calling for weapons.

At a total count of six, they breached. Nico took point. He went in low and took out the first man as he came at him with an old knife. It was a clean shot through the forehead. Parker took out the next one, Nico didn't see him as he came at him from the side. Josh, saved his life. He lifted his head in thanks and then they entered a small room. There were two men in this room and even though they were pinned down, they fired on the four soldiers.

Marshall laughed, stood in the middle of the small hallway and took two shots; both of them true. He hit the older man in the chest. It was a clean kill and he fell over, took one breath and died. The second shot hit the younger man, he couldn't be older than fifteen, in the hand, it disarmed him and Nico was sure that was exactly what Pittman had meant to do.

Marshall had taken a hit to his shoulder and he grunted with the impact of it, but it hadn't penetrated his Kevlar. He just stood there laughing like a madman for a second. Then he moved toward the man on the floor. He kicked the old AK47 out of the man's reach and pressed the toe of his boot into the man's hand wound.

The kid squealed and his head covering came off as he thrashed on the floor. Long hair poured out from under the scarf.

He turned and smiled at the men behind him. "We have ourselves a little lady boys."

Nico cursed and then turned to Parker. "See what you can get out her."

Parker was the best with the language. He kept the girl, who now that they knew she was a female was probably nineteen, in the backroom for the interrogation while the other three went through the supplies in the main room. He tied her up and came out to the main room to give his report.

He looked at the men, "Yes, they've been building the IEDs. Yes everyone in the village helped. Yes, if we let the woman go, they'll blow us to bits and Allah would bless every one of them in heaven. Blah, fuckedety blah…same shit we get from all of them."

Nico sipped from his canteen and then glanced at Rosado. He knew he was the hardest sell, though really he knew this was going to be hard to sell to himself. "We need to do our job."

Carlos nodded. "I know Chief, I know, can't we save the kids though?"

Marshall shook his head and fiddled with an ashtray that was on the table. "I just want this mission done. I hate this sandbox like everyone else, but this mission was fucked before we started. It's great that we put this supplier down, but fuck…kids. Damn." He spun the ashtray on its edge and watched it.

"Fuck, if there's a way I'd do it, but there's at least three babies and four toddlers up there. How are we going to get them out? It's a twelve mile hump back to our evac point. We can't do that with kids and there aren't any other villages on the map."

"I know…it's just…shit. I hate this motherfucking job sometimes." He shoved away from the small table.

Parker shrugged. "Well, I'm going to finish my job with her then." He pulled his sidearm out. "Unless anyone has anything else they'd like me to ask her?" He waited a second and then ducked back into the other room.

It was quiet for five minutes as the men sat and collected their thoughts.

Marshall reached for Nico's canteen. "You know Chief, if we just blow everything we don't have to see the kids. Easier, no faces." He glanced at the walls, the explosives that were stacked around them and then took a long draw form the can in his hand.

Nico nodded. "I was thinking the same thing." He looked at Rosado. "You think you can do that? Rig this place to go up?"

Rosado glanced around and nodded. "The village is small, it wouldn't take long to do. I mean, I couldn't do it all from down here, but…" he almost jumped when he heard the gunshot. "Shit, why the hell didn't he just slit her throat?"

Nico glanced at the kid. "Because the gun is more humane and you know it."

Parker ducked into the room then, the fly of his pants open.

"Josh, what the fuck did you do?" Nico's eyes narrowed. "Son of a bitch."

"Whoa, what are you accusing me of there Chief? I had to take a piss." He gave Nico a smug smile and redid his pants. "And if I did, what does she care? She's dead now isn't she…nothing more than she deserved anyway."

Marshall glared, growled and then stood.

Nico stood and stepped toward the other man. "You did or you didn't? Which is it Parker?"

"I didn't Careles." He glared at his Chief. "I didn't fucking touch her except to put a bullet in her head." He snorted. "Like it makes a difference at that point?" He rolled his eyes.

"It makes a fucking difference to me. This is my team Parker and it makes a fucking difference. Enemy yes, but still a human being. Do you fucking understand? Is that clear?"

"Aye, Chief. Fucking crystal Chief." He glared back.

"Good." He turned to Rosado. "Carlos, we can blow the village, but what?"

The young soldier looked from Parker to Careles and then to Pittman. He cleared his throat and stood. "I can't guarantee what you want from here, at least I don't think." He closed his eyes and figured trajectory and blast radius. He touched the walls. "I'm not sure how deep we are, or what the walls of are made of…not one hundred percent sure of the quality of the explosive. I mean theoretically, it should work, but I should wire some up top to be sure."

Marshall nodded. "I like the idea of blowing it all up though, easy-peesy." He looked at Nico. "You know, there's another way up in there. Probably into someone's house, not sure. I didn't go up, but it's smaller. Might just go to the outside," he shrugged. "We gonna move some of this shit topside then?" He picked up some of the explosive and wire. He fingered some detonators. "We need to move. Sun's gonna be up soon."

"See what Rosado wants you to do." He slapped Marshall on the shoulder as he headed toward the back to check out the other exit. He purposely didn't look at the girl's body. He didn't want to know if he was right, but he already knew he was.

He took Parker with him, since he wasn't sure he could fully trust him anymore. What started as a wide passage at the bottom, narrowed at the top. Marshall was right, it was smaller and it brought them to the outside. Nico exited carefully and he was just on the outside of the village. It was some kind of escape route most likely. He motioned Parker up and then they surveyed the village.

They watched Rosado and Pittman move building to building placing charges and laying wire. They weren't easy to see, but if you knew to look you could find them.

Parker hit him on the shoulder. "Fuck." He pointed down the road and in the far distance there were lights headed their way.

The two men headed into the village at a brisk run as Nico hit his radio. "Company coming in, looks like a truck."

Rosado was on the radio a second later. "What the fuck? Now?"

Parker answered. "Well what would you like me to do, politely ask haji to turn himself around and come back in two hours?"

"How close to done are you?" Nico asked sliding quietly to a stop beside Rosado and grabbing his arm. "Can we do the job and haul ass out?"

Marshall glanced around. "We'd blow most of it." He looked at Rosado and shrugged. "Only thing we'd need to be sure of is the first two houses. How much time?"

"Five, ten minutes maybe?"

Rosado nodded. "Let me and Pittman finish what we laid. You and Parker are gonna have to clear those two houses yourselves."

Parker spit. "Fuck." He nudged Nico. "We better move if we only have seven minutes Careles."

Nico nodded and they hurried toward the first two houses, which were small and could honestly be more appropriately called huts. They slipped into the first easily and found an older man and most likely his grown son sleeping. The fact that automatic weapons were inches from their hands made it easy to slit their throats. The woman who tried to sneak up on them with a knife also made it easy for Nico to kill. Again, when your life is threatened you don't think about the target.

There was no one else in the house and after they disabled the weapons, they moved to the second house.

Nico knew immediately this one would be different. There were small clothes hanging to dry by the stove when they entered and his foot brushed a soccer ball and it rolled.

Parker stopped it with his toe and held up two fingers to his eyes and pointed to the left and then pointed at Nico and to the right.

Nico nodded and headed right, gun at the ready. They had to move quickly, so they did. The rules were to eliminate the threats first. That would be the adults. Nico didn't find adults. He found kids. Four of them were asleep in the same bed. They ranged in age from what looked like twelve to about two. He lowered his weapon and sighed. He heard something behind, raised his gun and then realized it was Parker.

"Mommy and daddy won't be getting up anytime soon, so let's get this done." He glanced over Nico's shoulder. "Fuck…really?" His face dropped and he swallowed hard as he shook his head. "How we doing this?"

Nico turned away from the kids. They looked so peaceful in their sleep. He'd killed kids before in this job, but usually they were wearing vests with explosives, refusing to stop when ordered or otherwise doing something that was suspicious. He'd never killed a baby…He gagged and closed his eyes.

He looked back and realized that the oldest was awake and now there was a gun pointed at them. "Fuck, Parker." Nico let his gun hang from its strap and held up his hands. Parker was behind him. He smiled at the kid. "Hey, it's okay kid." Nico knew enough of the local dialect to speak it, but this bought him time.

The kid's hand was shaking and he started yelling at them about Allah's protection and death to the evil infidel and then Nico was pretty sure he called for his parents.

Nico kept his hands up and shifted as Parker did. He kept the smile on his face. "Parker you doing something back there?"

The kid was getting frantic. His yelling louder and he had already woken his siblings and was well on the way to waking the rest of the village.

"Yea, working a suppressor onto my sidearm. On three move right…one, two, three."

Nico ducked right and there was a loud pop and the kid slumped into the pile of kids on the bed. Then a second pop and Parker dropped the second oldest, who couldn't be more than ten, as she reached for her brother's dropped gun. The other two were little and they stared up at the soldiers terrified and huddled together.

Parker lowered his weapon and shook his head. "Fuck me I can't shoot them."

Nico sighed in relief. Parker had been the one who swore he'd be able to kill all of them, but at least he had some kind of heart under all that Kevlar. The problem was he had no idea what to do with them. They had orders, but… "We can leave them for whoever's in the truck."

Parker nodded. "Then let's get this done." He bent and picked up the younger of the kids, hushing him as he did. The kid was terrified, but didn't scream. He actually clung to him. "Get the other one then."

Nico bent and picked up the little girl. She looked to be about six, maybe seven and when he lifted her she wrapped her arms around his neck and sobbed quietly. On their way out the door, she cried out for her doll and without thinking Nico picked it up from the table as they passed. She snuggled it against her cheek.

They doubled back to meet Rosado and Pittman.

"Have you two lost your fucking minds?" Marshall growled at them. "What the hell are we going to do with baby hajis?"

Nico shook his head. "Leave them by the goat path and hope whoever's in the truck finds them." He started toward the path. He nodded. "Someone's gonna round up the animals eventually, they always do."

Rosado was making faces at the girl in Nico's arms and she smiled at him shyly and then held out her doll to him. He took it and rocked it and then handed it back, but she shook her head so he held onto it. "We need to move a bit quicker." He glanced at his watch and jogged ahead.

The girl in his arms started squirming, kicking and chattering about something. Nico wasn't exactly sure what she was saying. He was forced to stop to settle her down and readjust his carry. He looked to Parker, who also slowed his pace. "What the hell is she upset about?"

Pittman stopped with them and shook his head. "I don't like this man. Nico this is fucked up." He looked from one man to the other and at both the kids. Then he glanced back down the hill to the village. The headlights were closer. "We really don't have much time."

The boy in Parker's arms was squirming now. "She has this one riled up too, shit. She doesn't want us to go that way." He stopped and readjusted the kid in his arms. "Damn it kid sit the hell still." The kid pulled his helmet askew and he had to fix it.

There was a loud crack in the direction Rosado had gone and then a groan. The girl in Nico's arms laughed and jumped up and down yanking on his uniform as she called for her doll over and over again.

Nico pulled the kid against him and ran, the other two men running with him. It was Marshall who got there first.

"Shit, fuck…fuck it all to hell. Carlos, you motherfucker…hang in there man. What the hell?" He fell to his knees which obscured the view of the men rounding the bend immediately behind him.

"What is it?" Nico asked as he stepped around Marshall. "Oh holy hell." He glanced back at Parker. "Where are those headlights?"

Parker took a quick look at Rosado, or really what was left of him, and then he gagged. He took a breath and then glanced back down the hill. "Almost there, we gonna wait until they're in the village or blow it beforehand?" The boy in his arms was crying and he was getting louder.

Nico knew what he had to do. "Shut him up, will you." He looked at the little girl in his arms. She had known. She knew when she'd asked for the doll and then gave it to Rosado that there was a bomb inside. She didn't want to be there when it blew up, which was why she had them stop. She murdered his friend, his brother in arms. She could have murdered all of them.

"Wait until the truck is in the village and then blow ever single mother fucker up. We'll wait and then go down and be sure they're all dead."

"Fucking A." Parker nodded. "What about these two then?"

"Can we do anything for Carlos, Marshall?" He shifted the girl onto his other hip jostling her roughly and snapping at her in when she started chattering again. When she suddenly shut up, he looked at Marshall.

The man looked up at his friend and shook his head. "I gave him morphine, heavy doses…" He shook his head again and turned back to the dying soldier. "Carlos man, tell me about your daughter. What was her name?"

Blood bubbled from his mouth and he smiled. One of his eyes was gone but the other one lit up for a second. "Ca….Ca….Cammmila…"

"That's right Camila Grace wasn't it? She was a pretty thing. Your wife's name is Luisa and you met in high school, but didn't get married until she finished her dental hygiene school." Marshall kept talking to him as he tried in vain to stop the bleeding he knew was impossible to stop. His left arm was gone, a huge part of his side was missing, his thigh bone was sticking out and his lower leg was shattered.

More blood bubbled out of his mouth. "I…lo…love…her….tell her…"

"You tell her man. Okay? You do that…" Marshall wiped his face and he smeared blood across it and in his eyes. He didn't care. "You just shut up and tell her your goddamn self." He pressed against the side wound and blood just bubbled faster out his leg wound. "Fuck fuck…fuck!"

Carlos gasped and then he was gone.

Parker had been half watching as Rosado died, he'd also been watching the village, waiting for the truck to reach its destination. All the while he'd had his hand over the boy's nose and mouth. At first the kid had struggled and fought, his little hands scratching and tearing at Parker's hand and arm, but gradually the fight had left him. He knew what he was doing, he hadn't just been keeping him quiet and the kid was now slack in his arms. He dropped the boy's body to the ground. "This one's taken care of." His voice was cold and his eyes were dead. He nudged the boy's body with his boot until it rolled down the hillside.

Marshall stood, he was covered in blood and he glanced over Parker's shoulder to see the truck turn into the village. "It's here, so it's show time boys."

Rosado had done his job and the village was wired. It only took the press of two buttons and the village went up in a well orchestrated series of explosions. The largest came from beneath the village in the secret bunker.

When the dust settled, the three SEALs and one little girl reentered the village. The girl was much more subdued now. There were three survivors, if you could call them that and it was more a mercy to end their suffering. The truck was a surprise. A rebel leader happened to be one of its occupants and they confirmed his death. Nico knew that meant good things in their report, a likelihood of promotions, but it didn't matter since he'd lost a good man and he'd killed children. He still had one to kill.

She looked at him, her eyes wide and large with huge tears running down her cheeks. She squirmed away from him and found her way back to her own house. It was still mostly standing. She curled up by her mother's body sobbing and holding something tightly against herself. Nico wasn't sure what it was. It was roundish, or oblong and it looked grey or white in the dawn light. It seemed to have some sort of steam or vapor coming from the top.

His immediate thought was grenade and without a second thought he pulled his sidearm and fired. His aim was true, which didn't surprise him at all, and the little girl's prayers stopped midway through Allah's name. What did surprise Nico was the little rush of power and the thrill of, "fuck yea, take that bitch," that ran up his spine as she fell over. He watched slightly mesmerized as white powder filled the air when the hands that were clutching the object to her chest went into death spasms; definitely not a grenade then.

Nico took a hesitant step toward the bed and was assaulted by the sulfur scent of gunpowder, the dry acrid scent of sand and the soft delicate scent of baby powder mingled with the horrible scents of blood, death and excrement. The fine white powder coated his uniform, his weapon and he coughed as he inhaled it. He sneezed and backed away. She was dead. It was done and the immediate thrill he felt started to fade and something darker seeped into its place.

His hand was shaking and he blinked trying to get the sight of the pretty girl with the bullet hole in her head out of his mind. Yes, the little girl would have killed him if she'd had the chance, but could he blame her? They'd killed her parents and her siblings; they'd probably raped her aunt. They destroyed her home…

He left the hut, but that picture, that day and that scent…those are things that he would never forget. He got a commendation for that day. All of his men did, but he'll never forget how he failed that day. Failed to lead and things went too far with a prisoner, failed to follow orders and a soldier died, failed to do his damn job and now forever in his mind was look on that girl's face and the smell of gunpowder, blood and baby powder…

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He shook his head to clear the memories and glanced into the seat beside him. The kid was still out. He was afraid that if he left this kid out, let him go, didn't tie up the loose ends like he didn't with Tyler and his brother, and like he didn't way back then that it would only bite him in the ass once a again. He could fix it. He could make it right. He could make sure the kid never hurt anyone else again. Just like he should have with Tyler and Mason. Just like he should have with that entire village.

He arrived at his destination, put the car in park. He sat behind the wheel for a minute and tried to collect his thoughts, to decide what he wanted, if this was what he wanted. A quote from Sartre drifted through his mind, "Anything, anything would be better than this agony of mind, this creeping pain that gnaws and fumbles and caresses one and never hurts quite enough." He thought that was exactly how he felt. He wiped a hand over his face and undid his seatbelt. He went around the car, opened the door, uncuffed Kenneth Ellis and dragged the still unconscious man from the Lincoln.

"Today is your judgment Kenneth." He slapped his face to wake him once he was on the dirty ground. "Today, you face what you did and we find out if you deserve to live or if you deserve to die."

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Tommy waited for Ronnie to pick up her phone. Why the woman didn't answer he had no clue. It went to voicemail and he dialed again.

She picked up. "What the fuck Tommy, can't a girl take a piss without you disturbing her?"

"Okay that was almost too much info, why don't you take your phone with you like every other normal person next time. I need your help…or the boss does."

"What's up?" She sighed into the phone.

"He's hellbent on fucking shit up. I don't know what he's doing, but it isn't going to end well and I can't do it on my own. You and him seem to click, probably as well as him and me so, look. He had some bad shit go down when he was active, total FUBAR shit and it messed with his head. He doesn't carry a weapon for those reasons. Short version: he led a team, orders were to clean a village, kids involved, put a bullet in the head of six year old, only after the kid blew up one of his men, and one of his men raped a girl. So, you got that?"

She nodded and then realized what she was doing. "Shit. Fuck. Okay, and this somehow is needed info because?"

"He feels like he didn't follow orders and his man died. He feels like he let his men do things under his command, he feels like he killed babies…he feels bad all around. He stopped using that gun and doesn't carry any at all now that he's stateside. Told me once he was afraid he'd use it."

"Isn't that the point? If you need it, use it?" She was confused a bit still.

"Yea, but I think he means on the wrong people, maybe for the wrong reasons. You know, when he doesn't need deadly force. To end someone who probably is bad, but we have a justice system for…"

"So, like Kenneth Ellis?"

"Exactly." Tommy was glad she was catching on.

"Shit, and you're telling me this because he has a weapon and he's missing."

Tommy took a breath. "You nailed it and the cops have an APB out for Ken right now. He went to the gym, they found his car, but no one has seen him since he left the gym."

"Of course the car is legally parked and there are no cameras to see what happened."

"Nope." He looked at Dani who was pacing the hall nervously. "I'm at the hospital with Dr. Santino. "Do you have any idea where he might take him?"

Ronnie thought for a minute. If she were Nico, she'd want to prove a point to the asshole first, before she hurt him and oh, she'd hurt him before she killed him. "Yea, he'd take him back to the machine shop. He wants to remind him of what he did."

Tommy looked at Dani. "Ronnie thinks he might take him to the machine shop? Sound right to you?"

Dani cringed, but she nodded. It made sense and it fit. Her voice was barely a whisper. "Yes…he'd do that." She looked to Tommy. "Go get him, please don't let him do this…"

Ronnie kept trying to get Tommy's attention. "Tommy…Tommy…fuck you. Tommy!"

Finally he heard her. "What?" He put the phone back to his ear and then held it to Dani. "She wants to talk to you."

Dani took the phone. "Ronnie?" She was crying some, but not out of control yet.

"Listen, I think you need to go to him. I think he'll listen to you. Take Tommy and go with him, but you need to go."

She shook her head and looked back toward the room. "I can't leave Lindsay here alone."

Ronnie sighed. "Fuck…I'm fifteen minutes from you, I can pick you up or I can be at the shop in fifteen. You're what, fifteen from there too? Meet me there?"

Dani nodded. She could trust Tommy with her daughter and call Ray Jay to come. "Okay. I'll meet you there in fifteen minutes."

She hung up the phone and handed it to Tommy. "Stay here with Lindsay, I'm meeting Ronnie at the shop."

Tommy nodded. He'd rather go, but Ronnie was capable and he knew it. "Okay."

Dani pulled her own phone out and dialed her son. He answered and she simply told him she needed to run out and he needed to show up. He didn't ask much other than should he pick up some food. She told him that would be great and to bring some for Tommy as well. Then she kissed her daughter, who was still sleeping, and asked if she could borrow Tommy's keys.

He nodded, handed them over and she was gone.


	25. The Rabbit Hole

**_NOTE:_**I know this is later than usual, but life does that sometimes. I post when I can. I do have other things to do. I really love you all for your reviews. All of them. I appreciate that you take the time to let me know you read, you don't have to, but I really appreciate it. **  
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For those who asked, and thanks for asking, the personal stuff still exists...it's stable, but still semi-shitty. No, I'm not getting a divorce and no my kids are fine and no one is on drugs. And people are healthy, except for the occasional flu and cold. It's just other shit that falls under the purview of personal.

The ***Warning*** in this chapter is for rape content. Sorry I didn't add it sooner, it was an oversight. Avoid if you'd prefer.

Now a comment about comments in the flashback: I had many people ask if I served in the military. The answer to this, is no. I was asked this by several people who did serve because of the "reality" of the flashback. I think this means I did my job as a writer. If people who did serve were reminded of the reality of war by my flashback, then this goes to my second point. The people who were upset that "these things could not have happened." Oh, they did and they do. My flashback was written based on stories from friends and family members who did serve. It wasn't just 1 or 2, but several different stories.

The main story I used was from a close friend's husband who was in the Army Spec. Ops. His unit was simply rolling through, and a kid, oh about 7 or 8 came running up with a bunch of other kids asking for candy and smiling, this is common. The soldiers give out candy and toys. This kid gives the soldiers a soccer ball, the soldiers start playing with it, kicking it and as soon as they do, the kids run. The soldiers KNOW now, but it's too late. My friend's hubby loses his leg. The village is a rebel village. This kid ends up dead, found him with an assault rifle in his hands later. Most of the kids die this way in this village. This is 1 story out of many many more. These soldiers have to come back and live with this.

Don't judge them. Nico makes the comment in the last chapter and I took it from an ex SEAL I know. He actually says the words pretty damn close. "I get it, I know why he wants to kill me. I just shot his older brother and his father and he thinks we raped his sister. I don't blame him. If this was my home, I'd shoot me too. I don't have a choice. He might be 10, he might be 12 but he's my goddamn enemy, so I shoot him. I shoot him so he doesn't shoot me, or the medic coming behind me. I shoot him so we can get through this village and into the next one to end this mother fucking war so I can go home and see my babies."

* * *

**The Rabbit Hole**

Nico dragged Ken through the old building and down the hall. He didn't stop at the desk where he'd found Lindsay. He knew that wasn't where the video had been made. He knew it was in the back, deeper in the building. He shook the kid.

"Where? Which way was it you tortured her?"

Ken glared up at him. He was starting to realize this guy wasn't a cop, or if he was he was off his meds. "What the fuck man? I want to go home. You know my dad has money right?"

Nico snorted. "Look asshole, I don't need money. I want to know where was it that you felt the need to violate an innocent girl." He shoved open a set of doors and they entered a room filled with machinery. At the other end there was another set of doors. Nico shoved the kid ahead of him, but didn't let go of his arm. "She was innocent you know. A virgin until you pieces of shit got a hold of her. Did you care about that? Did you care that she wanted to stay that way, save herself for someone she loved and you took that from her. For what?" He couldn't help but hit the kid, so he didn't resist landing a punch to his right kidney and Ken's moan made him smile. "You took that for what, because you could? To prove something? Did it make you feel like a man?"

Ken was still trying to straighten up and he did gradually. He laughed some and shook his head. "You have no fucking clue do you?"

"You are unbelievable kid, you know that? I have a gun, it's loaded, I've threatened you and I'm a bit unstable right now and you're fucking laughing." Nico shoved him roughly through the doors and into the hallway.

Ken smiled at him. "You wouldn't dare." He shrugged and leaned against the wall as he caught his breath.

Nico pulled the gun, released the safety and without hesitation placed it calmly against Ken's temple. "I will without hesitation. I will pull the trigger, turn around and leave your body twitching on this cold, dirty floor." He said this without blinking and without emotion. His hand was steady and his voice was even. "I'll be sipping margaritas on a beach somewhere tropical in five hours and I'll never think about Ken fucking Ellis again."

Ken's smile faltered and he swallowed hard. The gun barrel was making a mark on his face it was pressed so hard. He started to think this guy was serious. He held up his hands. "Okay man, okay…put the gun down and I'll talk to you…"

The gun pressed harder for a second. Nico didn't want to lower it. He wanted to pull the trigger and watch the kid's brains paint the wall. He wanted to feel the spray of hot blood, taste the salt of it. He wanted to feel the kick as the small explosion of gunpowder in the chamber sent the recoil up his arm. There was a memory in him that was begging to be relived somewhere. Instead, he blinked and saw a scared kid and he took a breath and lowered the weapon. He slid the safety into place again. "Move." He shoved Ken forward and down the narrow hallway.

Ken exhaled and moved. Given this guy's current mood and his obvious connection to Lindsay Santinio, he wasn't really thrilled that they were heading toward the office where he knew they'd kept the girl. More than one actually, he'd known about several. He'd helped Tyler and Mason more than once with their videos. He enjoyed the videos, hell why not, but Lindsay had been more personal he had to admit. It was her fault that Libby had broken up with him and Libby had been fucking awesome in bed.

He pushed open the door and stepped into the office. "Here, this is the room, okay. This is where they kept her. Happy now?" He stared at Nico with cool contempt.

Nico kept the kid in front of him, shoving him along and shook his head. "No, happy is not the word for how I feel. You hurting someone I care about does not make me happy." Nico surveyed the room and frowned. He'd heard Lindsay's story, but still. He saw the bed against the wall and it was disgusting. It was filthy and stained. He could only imagine with what. No, he knew exactly what those stains were; so he didn't need to imagine…bodily fluid of every kind. He looked at Ken.

"So, did you even wait until she was awake to torture her?"

Ken looked at him. "Have you seen the video man?" He snorted and shook his head. "She's awake, trust me, she just doesn't remember it because of the drugs…" He shrugged. "It's better that she doesn't remember I'm sure. At least there's that, right?"

Nico growled. He grabbed the kid and slammed him against the wall. His forearm was against his throat. He was inches from Ken's face. "She does remember you asshole. She remembers feeling like she was drowning and gagging." Nico turned his head to the side. When he'd been captured he'd been tortured and waterboarding was not a completely American torture technique. He still remembered the feeling of water and god knows what else filling his mouth and nose. He looked back at Ken and pressed against his throat to cut off his air. He watched the kid start to struggle for air. "How does it feel Ken? How does it feel to not know if I'm going to let you get more air?" He pulled back and let the kid gasp and then pressed again. "Is it good?"

Ken pulled at Nico's arm and fought, but the guy was bigger and stronger, there was no way he could get away. He started crying and then mercifully there was air. He pulled in a long lung full and stared at this guy. Who the hell was he to Lindsay anyway?

Nico dragged the kid to the bed and shoved him face down on the nasty mattress. He held his face against it, put his knee in the middle of his back and put the gun to the back of his head. "She couldn't breathe Ken and you were violating her…taking away a part of her innocence. A part she should have had for as long as she wanted to keep it. A part no woman should ever have to let go of, unless it's something she wants." He pressed his knee harder into the kid's back and moved the gun around the kid's hair. "You just shouldn't have done it. You were so wrong. Did you do it anyone else Ken? Was Lindsay the first or were you in the other videos too?"

Ken made a noise in his throat.

"Oh, I know about all the videos. Do you know a girl named Juliette? A pretty blonde, she would have worked for the heroin. I know her too. That one is my daughter and if I find out you touched her, well I have some other work to do before the bullet goes through your brain." Nico knew he'd lost it. He was giddy with thoughts of what he wanted to do to this kid. All the thoughts of revenge he'd wanted for Tyler and Mason…oh, he could take all that out on Ken.

Ken started crying. Fuck this guy was scaring him and obviously wasn't playing. "Dude listen. I'm not gonna lie I helped Tyler and Mason with other girls, but I don't remember your girl…the blonde Juliette, I don't know that one. I never helped them with the drug exchanges. That's honest and true." He took a breath. "We can work something out. I'll admit I drugged Lindsay and take the plea they offered to testify against Tyler."

Nico shook his head. "Not good enough Kenny. I want you to admit to the drugs, and the assault and testify. Think about it this way; what if I had your mother on this bed Ken? Naked, tied down, screaming no, begging and crying while me and three or four other guys were pissing and cumming down her throat while someone forced her mouth open? How would that make you feel?"

Ken gagged. "Oh god…"

"Ahh, did you realize how horrible it might have been for Lindsay? How about it, you want to try to be the bukkake boy and human urinal? I'm sure we could find some guys who'll appreciate your pretty face and tight ass Kenny." He slid the gun down Ken's back and poked the seam of his pants. "Hell, might want to get used to it. After all, a boy like you will make a man a really nice bitch in prison."

Ken started struggling some. "Please don't…you can't do this…you can't…"

Nico pressed the gun harder into the kid's butt. "Is that what Lindsay said? No, please? You can't? Did she beg?" He lifted the gun and then brought it down across the side of Ken's cheek, whipping him hard across the face with it as he shoved off the bed. "You son of a bitch." He was so angry. He paced the room to the wall and then turned around and paced back.

Ken had rolled over and scrambled up against the wall. He had pulled his knees against his chest and Nico imagined that Lindsay had probably sat in the same position, terrified and afraid with her arms wrapped around her legs and tears on her face, just like Ken was right now. It didn't make him feel sorry for Ken, it just made him angry that the kid had done it to her, yet wanted mercy for himself.

Nico glared at him, so angry he was shaking with the violence of it. He held his gun at his side in his right hand. "You piece of shit. She begged and cried and you laughed and did exactly what you wanted, so you tell me Ken Ellis, tell me right now." He raised the weapon, slid the safety and stepped up to the bed. "Give me one reason right now why I shouldn't put a bullet between your eyes."

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Ronnie pulled up beside Nico's car with a curse. Dani wasn't there yet, or she didn't think she was since there were no other cars. She closed the door quietly and dialed Dani's number. She waited strumming her fingers on the hood of her car. She was about to disconnect and resend when Dani picked up.

"Where are you?" She stared into the distance waiting, hoping to see her.

"Stuck, there's an accident and I'm stuck until I can crawl ahead and make a turn." There was a honk and Dani cursed. "Like I can go anywhere asshole…are you there? Is he there?"

"Yes and yes, but I'm not inside I was waiting on you. Shit, I don't want to go in alone." She knew better, things might not go well if she did. She closed her eyes and thought. Tommy was at the hospital, AJ was out of town and Xeno was still in the city. "Fuck, Dani where is Ray Jay?"

"Ray Jay? Why?"

"If he's on this side of the accident he's closer than you and you're stuck. I need someone here to help me and there isn't anyone else close."

"Shit…I don't want him getting hurt Ronnie. Nico's…"

Ronnie cut her off. "Dani, listen I need help, Nico needs help and Ray Jay's a smart kid. Is he close to me or not?" She didn't have time.

Dani hesitated and then, "He might be, he was heading to the hospital. He's my baby Ronnie."

"Dani, I'm a mother I get it, but I need someone…"

"Okay…" her voice caught. "If he gets hurt I will kill you."

"I will let you."

"You have his number?"

"Yes, I'm hanging up now, get here when you can and text me."

Ronnie hung up and immediately dialed Ray Jay. His phone rang once and then he answered.

"Yo, not sure who this is, but what is up?"

"Ray Jay, it's Ronnie, where are you right now?"

"I'm driving to the hospital, just pulled out of the burger place on Merrick by Elliot. Why?"

"Thank god. I need your help and I need it now and you're only like five minutes from here." She closed her eyes and thought. "You remember where we found Lindsay? Can you get there?"

"Fuck yes, are you there? Is there a problem? Where's Nico and mom, should we call the cops?"

"Shut up. I'm here now, Nico's here and I need you here. Just get here as fast as you can. Do not get your ass pulled over. Do you understand me and do not call the cops. Your mother is on her way."

"Okay, got it. Ronnie, what the hell though? I mean I don't understand what's the deal? They have everyone…"He was nervous.

"Nico has Ken and he's upset. Your mom's stuck in traffic and we need to talk Nico down. I don't want to go in alone. It's me and you kid. I need you."

Ray Jay was quiet for a few seconds. He was nervous. Nico didn't freak out. "Ronnie, this is fucked up. I'm on Commercial. I cut through a few alleys and it's quicker through the old parking lot of the closed mill. I'll be there in a few seconds."

"I see your car, hanging up." She disconnected and nodded. The kid had a good head on his shoulders and was able to see things most people didn't. The alleys and the parking lot, even she hadn't seen those. He'd make a good soldier if he decided to go that route. Maybe it was the quarterback in him. He could visualize the passing routes, pick the best one available.

He pulled up beside her with a burger in his hand. He was finishing it as he exited the car.

She shook her head.

"What, I was hungry and it was only gonna get cold, figured I should eat it while it was hot." He popped the last bite in his mouth. "So, what's going on?"

Ronnie grabbed his arm and pulled him toward the building as she pulled her weapon from her shoulder holster. She checked the clip as she moved. "Here's the deal. We need to talk the crazy man off the ledge okay. He's just a little out of sorts. He needs people he trusts to be around him. That's me and you. You're the family and I'm the one who's gonna knock him in the head if he doesn't listen to reason. Let's just hope he listens to reason." They were in the building and moving fast down the hall.

Ray Jay's nose wrinkled when they hit the desk area. "God I can't believe this was where it went down…." He shivered and rubbed his arms. "Where are they? I thought you said they were here."

"They are kid, but your sister said she was in the back…she ran up here after she beat the hell out of Tyler." She motioned toward the doors and they pushed through them. She hurried them through the machine room and then through the other doors.

"Really? More?" Ray Jay whined.

"Shh, listen…that's Nico."

She was right. Nico was talking. They could just make out his voice and they moved down the hall toward it. There was an open door at the end of the hall and as they approached Ronnie held up her hand and whispered. "Quiet."

Ray Jay nodded and fell into step behind her.

Ronnie stepped into the room to see Nico's back facing her. Ken was on the floor by a bed in the corner of the large room and he was cowering. Nico's weapon was aimed at his head. If Nico pulled the trigger, he was dead.

"Hey boss, you sure you wanna do that without at least messing up his pretty face first?"

Nico didn't move. "What are you doing here Navarro?"

She moved into the room and as she did she motioned Ray to join her. "We're here. We came to help you beat the shit out of him."

Nico glanced quickly toward the door. "You brought the kid?"

Ray Jay puffed himself up and moved past Ronnie toward the bed. He glared at Ken. Anger rose up inside him. "Is this the piece of shit that hurt my sister?

Nico smiled and moved his eyes back to Ken. "Yes it is Ray Jay. He is the piece of shit that hurt your sister."

"Ray Jay," Ronnie put her hand on his shoulder.

He looked back at her and winked and then he shook off her hand. "Isn't this what you brought me here for Ronnie? Isn't this what we came for?" He rubbed his hands together and then looked at Nico. "So, do I get to hit him now?"

Nico glanced at the kid finally, but kept the gun trained on Ken and then he looked at Ronnie. "I'm going to kill Tommy when I get a hold of him."

Ronnie stepped around Ray Jay and put her hand on Nico's arm. She looked him dead in the eye. "You can do that." She nodded and smirked at him. "Hell I'll even help since he's a regular pain in my ass and I'd like to kill him on a regular basis, but how about right this minute you lower the weapon boss?"

Nico shook his head. "He needs put down. You know what he did." He motioned to Ray Jay. "The kid wants it done too."

Ronnie rolled her eyes and her hand slid down to his wrist as she shook her head. "No, Ray Jay wants him hurt, not dead because the kid wants you home with his mother tonight, not in jail." Her hand wrapped around his on the grip on the gun. "He wants you there to take care of his mom and Lindsay, not in some non extradition country for the rest of your damn life." She pushed his hand downward, lowering the gun.

The entire time Ken's eyes darted between the tall woman and Lindsay's brother. He knew Ray Jay, he'd played football against him. The woman was tall and sexy, but she looked like she'd kick his ass if he even mentioned it to her. He didn't move, he was terrified if he did the tall guy would shoot him. The gun was still on him, but he was hopeful that these two were at least going to keep him alive. This Nico guy, well hell, he was pretty fucking sure Nico was going to put that bullet in his head just like he said.

Nico let the gun fall to his side with a sigh. "Fuck you Ronnie."

"Fuck you too boss." She looked at him, but he wouldn't meet her eyes. "This isn't the way to get shit done man."

"I want to kill him." He sounded cold and defeated.

"I know."

"He's a loose end. I didn't tie up the last one and Lindsay got hurt." He looked down at Ken and the anger flared again. He glanced at Ray Jay and saw the kid's anger and pain, but also his confusion and fear. God, he'd been the confused angry kid once and all the hate and anger had turned him into what he was now. That and everything else he'd fucked up in the apst. "I don't want that to happen again."

Ray Jay bent and grabbed a handful of Ken's shirt. He hauled the kid toward him. "It's not going to ever happen again is it Ken?" He moved, rotated his hips and suddenly his fist landed solidly against the kid's jaw. Ken slumped back to the floor, out cold.

Ronnie snorted. "Fuck kid, you have a serious cross." She looked to Nico. "You teach him that shit?"

Nico smiled and shook his head. "No, but I'd like to know who did." He took a step and nudged the kid on the floor roughly with his shoe. "Nice punch, Ray Jay."

Ray Jay shook out his hand and winced. "Thanks and it was my grandma who taught me. She knows a thing or two about boxing."

"Why does that not surprise me?" Nico asked seriously. He still held his gun in his hand, the safety was still off and he was still primed to use it. "I still want to kill him."

Ray Jay snorted. "Dude, me fucking too, but Ronnie's right." He was looking at his hand and he glared at Ken. "I do want you home and Lindsay needs you." He looked up at the other man who was just a bit taller than him. He liked Nico. He'd done a lot for him, mom and right now especially his sister. "She couldn't have gotten this far without you and neither could mom." He shoved his hands in his pockets and hunched his shoulders. "Me, either…you I like. I don't want you gone man."

Nico looked away from the emotion in the kid's eyes. He didn't want to hear it. He wanted the anger, the hate. He wanted to feel it all for Ken and himself. He wanted guilt.

Ronnie wanted the gun out of his hand, but she could tell that wasn't going to happen just yet. "So really, did you have a plan here or what? You just gonna shoot him and run? That's really not your style boss."

He glared at her. "I hadn't quite finished thinking it through, okay." His finger rested on the gun barrel but he wasn't ready to safety the weapon yet. He simply had it down at his side, ready to go if needed. "I knew the final outcome, that's all. I just wasn't sure of the lead up."

"What is the final outcome Careles? Really? Are you going to put him down?" Ronnie crossed her arms over her chest, tucking her weapon against her chest as she stared Nico down. "Hey, I get that he deserves it, I do, but fuck man a lot of people deserve a lot of things. I'm sure you deserve some shit you didn't end up with." She shook her head and forced back some sliver of emotion. Then she looked to Ray Jay. "The kid there, he deserves some jail time for stupidity. At least that's what the Commonwealth of New York will say and me, trust me man, I did plenty of shit in my past to qualify me for some time behind bars or worse." She rubbed at her bicep. "I regret most of it."

Nico's eyes narrowed. "Most?" He shifted his stance to lean against the wall. He kept his eyes on Ronnie, but he could still see Ken on the floor. Ray Jay was looking nervous, but he wasn't worried about the kid right now, not too much anyway.

She shrugged. "Some of it I did to keep myself safe. I had to. If I didn't I wouldn't be here." She dropped her eyes. "I don't like that I was forced to do it, but…" She shrugged again. "It's like battle man, you don't have a choice when you're getting fired on. You fire back."

He nodded at her. He understood that all too well.

She sighed, "But that's not what I'm talking about. You need to let your bullshit go boss. You need to just forgive whatever happened in the past." She took half a step toward him and saw him tense, so stopped. "If you can't forgive, then just let it go and learn to control it so it doesn't control you anymore. You control it. You master that memory and use it to strengthen you, so it can't control you anymore."

His hand gripped the gun even tighter and his eyes shifted to the floor and settled on Ken.

Ronnie noticed that and the way his jaw tightened along with the hard glint that settled in his eyes. Shit, she wasn't getting through to him. She looked back at Ray Jay and she felt the emotion press, but she pushed it back. She'd do this if she had to. To make her point, to keep these people she'd come to respect and actually like, and in Nico's case, in a brotherly way love, safe.

She took a deep breath. "Hey boss I never told you about my deployment, did I?" She moved toward the wall where he was standing and nonchalantly leaned against it beside him. She let her head fall back against it and then squatted down. "Pop a squat old man, this might be a while."

Nico glanced down at her, puzzled. He'd never heard Ronnie, in all the five years he'd known her, talk about her time in the military. Oh, she'd mention it in passing, and he had her file. He knew more than she probably thought he did, but he didn't know her side of the story. He had the Army's story. He looked at Ray Jay. "Drag his ass over here so I can see him." He waved his gun around like it was a laser pointer.

"Boss, you know that thing isn't safetied, right?" She looked at him out of the corner of her eye. "You might want to…"

"Don't tell me what I might want to do." Calm, cool, in charge and no questions were to be asked. That was the voice he used.

Ronnie looked at him and whistled and then smiled as she watched Ray Jay drag Ken. She leaned closer to Nico and kept her voice low. "I don't like the boys, and even if I did, I give the orders, but damn boss…" She shook her head, "that about made me shiver." She winked at him and sat back.

He almost cracked a smile and couldn't help but wonder if she were serious. He gave her a look, but she was watching Ray Jay now. "You still work for me Navarro, so you do take orders from me."

"Yep, but I also get to tell you when you're being an ass without repercussions because this isn't the military and well this isn't anything else now is it?" She smiled wide, but kept her face straight ahead. "Maybe I'll have Ange ask Dr. Dani about that?" She let her eyes shoot to the side to catch his response. She was trying to throw him off guard and lighten the mood. She was hoping for some camaraderie.

He shook his head and nodded at Ray Jay, indicating that the line she was taking wasn't going any further. "You're incorrigible." He bit back the smile, he knew what she was doing. "So, you were deployed…"

She nodded, happy that she got what she wanted and indicating she understood. She looked at the Santino kid. She wasn't sure she should be telling all this with him here. "Ray Jay, do want to hear this?"

He looked at her and then Nico. He grabbed a metal folding chair from the middle of the room and pulled it closer. The seat was bent, but it was usable. He opened it and sat. He was close to the two of them and near Ken. "Look, I'm a big boy. My sister was horribly abused by this asshole and his friends. You two are talking code for kinky sex games that include my mom." He laughed when then exchanged surprised looks. "Dude, I'm not an idiot." He gave Nico an odd look with narrowed eyes and then looked at Ronnie with a new respect and some fear. "If you have something to say, I can hear it. Then we need to figure out what the hell we're doing with this cockbag, because I'd love to take the knife off your belt Ronnie and cut his balls off with it. That is, if neither of you decide to shoot him."

Ronnie laughed. "I like the kid's idea. Let's just neuter him." She reached for her knife.

Nico put his hand on hers and shook his head. "No, no…" He didn't want that knife anywhere near this piece of shit. Not yet…not now. Fuck, not ever. He swallowed. He looked at Ronnie. "Story Ronnie, tell it. You had a reason…so tell your story." He needed to stop thinking because if his thoughts kept going where they were, he was going to kill the bastard right now. He was back to the night they'd found her and what he'd been forced to do with Dani all because this shit head had hurt Dani's baby girl. He lifted his right hand, his index finger was trembling. He wanted to fire the fucking gun.

It was Ray Jay who noticed. "Hey Nico man, he'll still be here when the story's over." Ray Jay kicked Ken in the ribs. The kid on the floor moaned and curled around himself. "See, he's not going anywhere."

Nico looked at Ray Jay. "Yea, good…yea…okay, so story then."

Ronnie took a breath, glanced at Ray Jay, mouthed, "Thank You" and then started. "So, you know how things are with a unit. You learn who you can trust and who you can't pretty quick. I was one of three women in my unit and they start up a new program to propagate good will or some such bullshit. Well, they need women and they need translators. Well, I qualify for both and I don't even really volunteer as get shoved to the head of the line by my E-7 who doesn't like me." She looked at the men and took a breath.

"You know how this bullshit goes. I did manage to drag one of the guys I trusted from my squad with me. He's the one guy that if I wanted a drink I always went with and was always seen with. Nice big blonde guy from Idaho named Johnson. Good guy, manners, treated all the girls nice." She looked to Ray Jay. "You gotta understand kid, the girls over there, we got treated really bad…if the guys got drunk, they didn't listen to you say no. There weren't many women and well, you had to be careful. So, I went nowhere without one of the other girls or Johnson after dark."

Ray Jay frowned and looked to Nico who nodded. "It's true, lots of guys were that way, not all but enough to make it really hard for the ladies in the military during the wars."

Ronnie continued. "So, got the new orders and we went into the villages after we rolled through. A bunch of us women, it was our job, they actually found a few more girls, and it was our job to talk to the women, see what they needed. Did they need clean water? Were the pumps broken? Did the kids need vaccines or medicine, did the women need healthcare? Because the men never thought to ask for help for the women. They wanted cars, guns, goats, seed, but the women and children could starve and they'd never ask the US for help with that. They just didn't put much priority on it. I liked the job, we were helping. It was good work. I felt good when I was done each night. Not like I shot at people, but like I helped someone." She smiled.

Nico frowned. "It sounds like a good program, so what went wrong?"

The sparkle left her eye and she frowned. "Sometimes the villages weren't as clear of rebels as we they were supposed to be and we fought. That was always a risk and we knew that. There was also the risk that the women or families would turn on us. We didn't take weapons into the houses most of the time. Everyone out of the house, our escort would search the house and then stand guard outside and then we and the women would go in and talk, then we'd suit back up outside the house again. It was an odd ritual, but it worked. But, it wasn't them that fucked shit up."

**_****_**_**Warning******_

She paused and stared at the ground. "One night we got stranded on a bombed out road, stuck between two fire fights. We couldn't get to base, so we stayed the night where we were. It was me and another woman, Liz, with Johnson and four other guys. I woke to hear Liz struggling. I got up and found two of the guys holding her down while one raped her." She looked up. "I went ballistic. Screamed for Johnson who came to help me, but only was threatened to either shut me up or I'd end up like Liz."

Ray Jay looked away with tears in his eyes.

Nico reached for Ronnie's hand with his left. "What happened?"

"He tried to pull me back to our sleeping place, but I wouldn't let him. I called him a coward. Which he was, but he kept telling me I was going to get hurt…I couldn't let that happen to Liz. I'd been in her place before and I wasn't going to let her be there alone and let her think no one cared." She squeezed his hand. "I pulled my side arm, ran back and pointed it the head of the guy between Liz's legs. He was the squad leader, some stupid shitty Sergeant that thought he had all the power because of stripes on his shoulder. "

"Where was the fourth guy? You said there were four other guys…one's missing." Ray Jay asked quietly.

Ronnie laughed dryly. "Yea, I was so angry I didn't think about that when I ran back. Where was number four. Good call Ray Jay, you'd make a good military man. Four had already had his fun and was taking a piss. He came back about the time I had the gun to Sgt. Stupid's head. Then my gun was out of my hand, a gun was on Johnson and all I can say is Liz thanks me still for what I did for her. The rest of the night I was the toy, over and over and over again. They left Liz alone. Her and Johnson got handcuffed inside the Humvee." She looked at Nico, there were no tears on her face. Her voice was calm. "Those men were my brothers. They saved my life before and even after that. I reported them and I was told: This never happened."

"What?" Ray Jay stood so fast his chair flew backward into one of the pillars. "How can they say that? Liz? Johnson?"

Ronnie smiled and looked at him. "Both testified for me, but it's the Army kid. The fucking US Military. They make the rules, they write the history books. If they say it didn't happen, then it didn't happen." She squeezed Nico's hand. "I found out I was pregnant two months after that. I mean my cycles were all shit over there anyway, but when I started puking every day and I went to see the medic and she knew about my report of assault that wasn't assault, she did the test. I was floored. I was like no, no, no, no…can't fucking be. They shipped me home. I hired a lawyer. Nothing came of it. They discharged me medically."

"Abortion?" Nico asked quietly. "Did you consider it?"

She gave him a hard look and for the first time tears pooled in her eyes and she shook her head. "You haven't met Hugo. He's the best thing to ever, ever come into my life and that's the whole point of this damn story boss." She sniffed. "Something changed that night while I lay naked and bleeding in the sand. I stared up at those fucking foreign stars while men who up until that point I had considered brothers, fucked me with their cocks and whatever else they could find to shove inside my holes and I wanted to die, hell I prayed they'd kill me when they were done, or leave me there for the enemy to find so they'd finish the job." The tears ran down her cheeks. "They took away everything. I had no hope. They took away my pride. My identity, my strength, my belief that there were enough good men in the damn army…and world that shit like that wouldn't happen. They even took the family I'd created out of the military. I wanted to kill every one of them and then myself."

She wiped her eyes stubbornly. She didn't want to let them see her tears. She smiled and shook her head. "Fucking hate this shit. But once I found out there was a life growing inside of me something changed. Yes, I should have been disgusted. That night was disgusting. To me, sex with men, even before that night, was disgusting, but the fact that life came from something so horrible somehow brought me hope. It made me realize that there is something bigger and greater than me. Some people would think fate was cruel and that the baby would be a reminder of such a horrible thing to me for the rest of its life. People told me to give it up for adoption, but I couldn't. It needed protected and loved. I started thinking of it as a boy. A boy that needed raised right. A boy that needed taught how to treat women properly and not to look at them like they could be touched any time or handled rough or that sex was expected because you paid for a hotdog."

Ray Jay snorted.

Nico smiled and looked at him.

**_****_**_**END******_

Ronnie shrugged. "I was pregnant, it was fucked, but I just couldn't let the baby go. He was part theirs, but completely mine and once I found out he was a boy, that sealed it completely. I was raising him as my own. I picked the name Hugo before he was born- strong in body, mind and spirit. I want him that way. Hell, he is that way." She laughed and her whole face lit up. "His middle name is Tomas. Tom was Johnson's first name. He tried to help the best he could. I don't hear from him much anymore, but I send him a card every year at Christmas. He's married and has a baby on the way."

Nico was quiet and he watched her, his thumb he noticed was tracing a kanji over the top of her hand and he stopped. He let her words work into his head, but it didn't really change how he felt.

She took a breath and watched his hand. "Strength. I know that one because it's over my heart. I had it put there after I got back." She looked up and found his eyes. "I'm glad you think so boss, but it's been a long road to find it, trust me and the ink's there to remind me."

Ray Jay cleared his throat. "Did you just forgive them? After they did that to you? I mean okay, you have a great kid, but they hurt you."

Ronnie looked at the kid and she saw the confusion and pain on his face. She knew most of it was for his sister, but she saw the genuine empathy for her own story and her respect for him and Dani's ability to raise a son the way she had increased. She gave him a sad smile. "I let the anger go." She shook her head. "Forgive, well that depends on what you define that as. I choose not to be angry. Those men went on to save many lives. Sgt. Idiot actually did some cool shit. I'm not saying he's a great man, but he did. He also sent me a letter of apology. He did not sign it, but he did include his stripes in it. I know who it was from. It meant a lot to me." She looked to Nico now. "The way I look at it is- what if they had been Court Martialed? They wouldn't have been there to save their fellow soldiers and many others would have died. All of those men were transferred to different units after the disciplinary hearing. They all moved quickly to places where they did the most good. None of that would have happened if that night didn't occur. I wouldn't have Hugo, I wouldn't have met Angie…I can't hold onto hate and anger when that one night of evil brought me goodness. Yes, it was bad, but I am where I am because of it and that I wouldn't change."

She took her hand from Nico. "Can you tell me you would change where you are boss? I know this is because of the past, but if that shit didn't go down exactly like it did over there would you be the man you are right now?" She paused, stood and moved to Ken. She looked down at him. She hated that he hurt Lindsay and the feelings he brought back up in her were raw. "He makes me feel those feelings again too. Helpless, worthless, less than nothing…" She kicked him in the kidney and spit on him. She looked between the two men with her and her gaze settled on Nico. "I hate it, but I don't let those things control me anymore. You're always in control boss, why are you letting this punk ass kid get to you? I know the rage wells up inside sometimes and the need to punch and hurt someone. That's when I hit the ring. I know the need for control is intense. I have ways of dealing with that and I know you use the ring too, so cut the bullshit and pull yourself together boss. This isn't gonna cut it."

Nico stood. Everything in him felt raw, like he'd been run over a cheese grater. She was right. Everything in his past had brought him to where he was. If certain things hadn't happened would he have Dani in his life? The thought of her not being there went through him like a fire at flashpoint. It seared his soul and almost brought him to his knees. It didn't make him want to kill Kenneth Ellis any less. It didn't make him any less angry or hurt, but it made him realize that if he did this that he'd lose everything he had.

There was a sound behind him and he turned. His right arm was up and his finger was on the trigger. His eyes found Dani's confused face about four feet away and he saw her eyes go wide in fear and surprise and then Ray Jay was between her and him.

"What the hell Nico? Put the fucking gun down." The kid was pissed and he pulled his mother into his arms and turned his back to Nico as he glared over his shoulder at the older man. "So help me I will knock you out if you don't."

Nico lowered his arm and safetied his weapon.

Dani shoved out of her son's arms. She glared up at him defiantly. "What the hell do you think you're doing Raymond James Santino Jr.?" She poked him in the center of his chest. "Don't you ever do that again." Then she moved around her son and marched toward the tall, dark man a few feet away. "And you, oh you…" She scowled at the Sig in his hand and then pointed at it in disgust. "I like you much better without that thing." She reached for it and took it from him and then handed it to Ronnie. "Thank heaven you didn't kill him or fire that thing at me or anyone else." She looked at Ken and ground her teeth.

"I hate him Nico, I know exactly what you feel and I told you about that feeling a while back." She wrapped her arms around herself and squeezed. "But I need you in my life more than revenge." She looked up Nico. "Do you get that? You." She stepped into him and against him. "I want you. The police and the courts can have him. I need you with me and Lindsay and Ray Jay."

Nico stood still for a second, his arms down at his sides. He was still processing. He'd raised his gun at her. At Dani. No, he hadn't fired it, but his finger had curled around the trigger. He'd applied pressure, squeezed it. It wouldn't have taken much more and the gun would have gone off. He knew it. He'd been close. He would have hit her or Ray Jay. At that range the bullet may have gone through both of them depending on where it had hit. Probably not fatal, but he would have injured them. He never would have forgiven himself for that.

"Oh god Danielle…" His arms slid around her and he pulled her to his chest. He didn't say anything else. He couldn't, not with Ronnie and Ray Jay there.

Ronnie knew things weren't completely under control, but at least she had the Sig in her hand and Ken was still breathing. So, she nodded and moved to where he was on the floor. "Okay asshole, you survived. Aren't you a lucky piece of shit?" She yanked him to his feet. "Now, here's the deal. We're gonna play a game. This bullshit here never happened the way you think it happened. Do you understand me?"

Ken shook his head confused. "Huh?"

"Oh brother," she looked at Ray Jay. "He's not very smart, but okay let me explain it in simpler terms then. You were not kidnapped against your will. You were not assaulted. Nope, that is not what happened."

Ken's eyebrows pulled together. "It's not?"

"No kid. You tried to talk to Ray Jay here and you got beat up a bit when he defended himself. You were trying to talk him into telling his sister to back off. That's what happened right?" She brushed off his clothes some.

Ken nodded. "Um, okay and if I tell the truth?" A cocky tone crept into his voice.

Ronnie smiled. "Really? You want to play it that way?" She shook her head. "I know people in prison kid. Do you want to see my gang ink? I can pick what I want done. Let's see, do you want a big black cell mate that likes pretty little white boys? Or maybe a Chicano banger who just wants to whore you out for cigarettes because he's not into boys at all? But he'll gladly knock all your teeth out to make sure your blow jobs are the best on the cell block."

Ken swallowed hard. "You…you… wouldn't do that."

"Try me kid. I grew up in neighborhoods where you'd get rolled the first ten minutes you crossed into. Hell, I'd probably be one of the one's to roll you back then." She smiled. "So, you're gonna tell the cops exactly what I just told you." She motioned to Ray Jay. "Ray Jay's gonna report it like that too and then you're gonna confess to hurting Lindsay Santino, helping those boys drug her and all the other tapes and girls you hurt too." She slapped the back of his head. "You got that?"

He nodded and bit his lip to keep it from quivering. "Oh god…"

"You should have been praying a long time ago kid. Now, let's get the hell out of here."

Ronnie looked over her shoulder and nodded at Dani and Nico, who barely paid her any attention. She'd sent a message to Tommy. He was notifying the police for her. They would be meeting them.

Nico heard Ronnie and he watched the three of them leave. He saw that she'd tucked his Sig into the waistband of her jeans and it turned his stomach to think of what he might have done. "Danielle, I'm sorry."

She pulled back and looked up at him. She was crying, but more from relief. She wasn't angry, she'd been scared. She'd been so afraid that he'd cross a line she wouldn't be able to bring him back from. She reached up and cupped his face. She wiped the tears with her thumbs. "I love you. You're an idiot, but I love you."

He frowned and shook his head as his hand found one of hers and pressed it closer to his cheek. He kissed the palm. "I could have killed you Dani." He shivered and felt bile rise in his throat. "I brought that gun up on instinct and almost fired it. You don't know how close it was."

She was shaking her head even as he spoke. "But you didn't…you didn't." She looked around the room and took in the filth and the stained mattress. "Get me out of here please. I don't want to be here." She looked up at him. "Take me to your loft."

He wasn't sure that was a good idea. "Dani, I…"

"Nico, your loft." Her voice was quiet. "Please, you need to be there. A place you are surrounded by routines and things that calm you." She slid beside him. "My house is not that place."

"You calm me Dani. No matter where I am." He pressed a kiss to her hair.

She smiled and turned. "Please, it's what I need too."

He nodded then. "Lindsay?"

"Ray is with her. I called while I was stuck in traffic. Tommy said she was still sleeping when I checked in last."

"Are you sure?" He did want to be home again.

"Yes."

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

It was late when they arrived, so he ordered Thai food delivered and then decided on a shower while Dani waited for it. He didn't bother thinking about all the water he was wasting, which he usually did. He just enjoyed the heat and the steam. He enjoyed the feel of the soap and washcloth. He enjoyed the way it felt as if he was washing away everything he'd done. He sat on the bench and let the water beat down on his neck and upper back until Dani opened the door to the bathroom.

"Hey, the food is here." She stood by the glass doors and watched him. "You okay?"

He raised his head and then reached up and turned the water off. "Yes and no, but mostly I will be."

He stood and then took the towel she handed him when he opened the door and stepped onto the shower mat. He watched her watch him dry and then he wrapped the towel low on his hips and stalked to where she leaned against the sink. He flashed a cocky smile. "Enjoy the view?"

She blushed and nodded. "I always enjoy the view" Her hands settled on the towel and traced up his sides to his nipples where she played before her hands went around his neck. "The food?"

"Can wait a minute. I just want a kiss." He kissed her lips softly and she sighed against him. His tongue teased her lips open and slid inside. He didn't press her or even take control. This was pure seduction as one hand slid into her hair and pulled it free of the elastic band she'd pulled it back and up in and his other skimmed up her side to the curve of her left breast. He didn't so much caress the side of her breast as ghost over it and he felt her shiver in response. He massaged her scalp as he deepened the kiss when she asked him to with her body, stepping into him, pressing against him and pulling closer.

Dani was almost stunned that this was the man she'd made love to so many times recently. God, it was almost night and day, but not quite. She could feel his need vibrating underneath whatever he was doing and god what he was doing. His thumb brushed her nipple through her sweater and she moaned into his mouth. Her tongue slid along his and he tasted of mint and Nico. She nipped at his lips when his tongue retreated and he paused and pulled back with a moan of his own.

He pressed his forehead to hers and let his hands drift over her shoulders. He teased her breasts through the thin cashmere and the satin of her bra. "Danielle…" Her name fell like a prayer. "I need you so much, but…" He lifted his head from hers and found her eyes. "I want to talk to you. We need to talk."

She reached up and her hand slid into his wet hair. She shook her head. "Not now." She tried to pull his head back to hers. She wanted more of his mouth, but he wouldn't budge. "Please Nico." She found his eyes and asked him with those too. She pressed against him. He was hard against her belly. "You need me, I need you…"

He stepped back and cleared his throat. "Dani please, let me get something on. Let's eat." He left her in the bathroom.

She found him in the bedroom pulling on a pair of jeans. She sat on the bed and watched as he found a plain grey t-shirt and pulled it over his head and then ducked back into the bathroom. She was frowning when he came back out with his hair combed and smelling of his aftershave.

He held out his hand. "Hey, I didn't turn you down for prom." He pulled her up and into his arms. He pressed a kiss to her nose. "I didn't even turn you down for sex."

She hugged him and pressed her face into neck as she inhaled. "God, Lindsay is right. You smell so good." She just needed him. It wasn't the sex, it was the connection to him she needed. She craved it and without it she felt like something was missing between them. "It's not that. I just don't know what it is. Let's eat."

He nodded and tucked her under his arm as he pressed a kiss against her hair. He knew what the problem was. They needed to talk about what happened. It was between them. Dani knew this and she wanted to reconnect. Sex was the easy route, but it wouldn't solve the problem. "Get some plates. Do you want wine?"

Dani shook her head. No, she really didn't. "Do you have beer?"

Nico smiled. He did and he could go for some himself. He opened the fridge and pulled out two Stella Artois and then opened them with the opener from the drawer. He watched as Dani set the table and set out the food. He poured beer into glasses and then they sat down at the dining table to eat.

It was quiet at first and then Dani asked. "Were you really going to kill him?"

Nico fiddled with his chopsticks and then picked up more noodles. He chewed and then looked over at this woman he loved. He nodded. "Yes. I would have killed him." He watched her shiver and saw the dark disappointment flood her eyes. "I was stuck with a recording of my past failures. I didn't tie up loose ends, someone got hurt. The same thing happened with Lindsay and I wasn't about to let that happen again." He put his chopsticks down and took a drink.

"Then Ronnie and Ray Jay showed up and they reminded me about you. Ray Jay wants me in your life. He wants me around not just for you and Lindsay, but for him too. Ronnie considers me family." He looked at Dani. "That's more than I've had in a long time." He shook his head. "There was Marshall and maybe Juliette when I could work around Marshall and Gabrielle, but that was all."

Dani took his hand. "You know I never thought you were going to shoot me." She squinted at him. "I mean staring at a gun is scary, but it's you." She looked him dead in the eye. "I trust you with my life. There is no way you would have done that."

He swallowed hard. "I really almost did baby. You don't know how close I was and if that would have happened, I would have never forgiven myself." He held onto her hand for dear life.

She shook her head. "No. You saw me and you stopped. I saw it on your face. There was a moment when yes, and then it was gone. You're a soldier and your reflex was to protect yourself, but then your subconscious understood there was no threat before your conscious brain did and you had already started to stand down. You just didn't realize it because it took your brain that extra second to catch up, but the muscles had already relaxed, your finger was already moving off the trigger. Think about it. Tell me that isn't true?"

He tried to think, but he kept seeing it the same way. He shook his head. "I wasn't in control. I don't like losing control. It's not something I handle well. I was out of my element and I'm having trouble with focus right now."

She frowned. "We could do some light hypnosis and…"

He shook his head. "Absolutely not." He pulled his hand from hers. "I had a bad experience and I don't want to do it again." He picked up his glass and moved to the living room. He stared out the window. "I can't and I know you do good work Dani." He took a drink. "I've watched you, but I just can't do it."

Dani picked up their plates and scraped them into the trash before putting them in the dishwasher. She put the leftovers in the fridge and then set her glass on the counter before she moved to him. She slid her arms around him from behind and pressed her cheek to his back. "You don't have to. It was a suggestion and I'd never force you."

He turned and set his glass on the coffee table before pulling her against his chest. "I know." He rested his chin on the top of her head and just stayed there for several long minutes. "I'm afraid to lose control Dani. I'm terrified I'll do it again."

She leaned back and looked up at him from inside the circle of his arms. "You didn't quite lose control. You almost did, there's a difference."

He shook his head. "Not to me. It's the same. That anger's like a beast and it starting yawning when I found out about Juliette getting hurt, but it woke up when Lindsay got hurt. I refused to pay attention to it and I kept it in its cage; controlled it. But not tonight, tonight I let it push me. I let it have me." He searched her face. "With Ronnie's help and your help and Ray Jay's help, I pushed it back into its cage, but it's still in here Dani. It's still thrumming in my veins and under my skin. It knows it's awake and now that I fed it, it doesn't want to be put back to sleep."

A single tear ran down his cheek. "I don't know what to do."

"Shh." She pulled his head down to her shoulder and held him as she whispered quietly against his hair. "Shh. We will figure this out."

He held on to her and nodded into her shoulder. He breathed her in as if she were oxygen. He knew she was his savior. He knew that without her he was going to fail at putting the beast back in its box. He lifted his head. He looked at her he was desperate.

"Do you think the hypnosis would work?" He was scared. Hell he was terrified.

She pointed to the couch and waited until he moved and they both sat. "First, tell me what happened the time you had a bad experience."

He swallowed and leaned his head on the back of the couch to stare up at the ceiling. "Shit, it was after Marshall brought me home and I was a damn mess." He'd never told Dani about what happened, hell he never told anyone about what happened. "They wanted to know if I had revealed anything, I hadn't, but that didn't stop them from hypnotizing me and asking me over and over and then asking me what they did over and over and making me relive each fucking minute of it." He stopped when he felt Dani's hand on his cheek and heard his name.

"Nico, it's okay." She tilted his face to hers. "You aren't there and you're safe. You aren't under right now and I'm with you." She smiled at him.

He nodded and gripped her hand. "Yea, but you see what happened?"

"I do, and what they did was abusive and not what I'm going to do. That wasn't light hypnosis either. That was regressive and heavy." She brushed hair from his forehead. "I wouldn't do that. I just want you to see that you were in control. It wasn't that beast. It was you, my Nico. The man who loves me."

He nodded. "Okay, okay." He took a couple of deep breaths. "Let me get my head settled."

Dani watched him breathe and as he did some of the tension left his body. His head settled back onto the couch again, his shoulders slumped, his arms and hands opened.

He nodded with his eyes closed. "Okay."

"Breathe in and out and listen to the sound of my voice, slow and deep…" Dani guided him through the steps of her hypnosis and he followed her easily, she knew because he wanted to. If he didn't, there was no way Nico would be under. "You're standing in the room with the bed talking to Ronnie and Ray Jay, Ken is on the floor and then what happens?"

Nico's brows pulled together and he cocked his head. "I hear something. It's behind me so I turn. I bring up my weapon, it's my Navy Sig and my finger slides to the trigger automatically. Training kicks in even though I haven't carried since I came home."

"Who's there?" Dani asked the question, she knew the answer to.

"Dani, what the hell is she doing here? I'm not going to shoot her, but I scan behind her for threats because Ray Jay pulls her to cover her and it alarms me. Then she shoves Ray Jay out of the way, yells at him and then me, shoves my gun away. I'm stunned, she's so tiny but such a bossy thing. I want to turn her over my knee for scaring the piss out of me."

Dani wanted to laugh and slap him, but mostly laugh. "You'll remember everything you just told me and you'll wake up feeling refreshed and good about what you just learned. You weren't going to shoot me, you said that. You were looking for other threats. One, you're starting to wake up…two, you're more awake and feeling refreshed and energetic and three, you're awake and remember."

Nico blinked at the ceiling and then he smiled and blinked again. He lifted his head and stared at Danielle. "You scared the piss out of me."

She leaned closer to him. "And you want to turn me over your knee for it."

He smiled. "I don't really need an excuse for that."

"Seriously though, how do you feel?"

"Better. You were right. I wasn't going to fire the gun at you. Ray Jay spooked me into thinking there was an actual threat."

Dani nodded. "See."

He grabbed her and pulled her against him. His mouth found hers.

She kissed him, again surprised that he wasn't pushing and taking. She pulled back and looked at his eyes puzzled. "Are you okay?"

He smiled. "I want to make love to you Dani." He stood and pulled her into his arms. "I want to lay you down and make you breathless, I want to hear you scream my name when you cum." His hands found their way into her hair. "I want to touch and taste every inch of you." His hand moved down her back to her waist and then he pulled her sweater up. "Lift your arms baby." He waited until she did and he pulled it over her head and tossed it to the couch and then he added. "Tonight I need to let you know how much I love you, need you and thankful I am that you're in my life."

He kissed her quickly and smiled when she moaned sweetly for him.

She was confused when she looked at him, "Oh god, I love you so much."

He smiled, "Good." He took her hand and led her to his room. He pulled her into his arms and kissed her nose before he pivoted and sat on the bed, pulling her between his knees. He reached down to pull his t-shirt over his head and then tossed it to the floor, "I love you too baby." He said seriously, as he brushed Dani's hair across her shoulders and pulled her bra straps slightly down her arms, lowering the bra enough so that the top of the cups scraped against her nipples.

Nico watched her nipples harden and then he pulled her closer and ran his tongue across, first one then the other. He felt her grip his shoulders and then when he used his teeth to pull the bra lower she shivered, making small sounds in her throat. Nico pulled back and smiled. His hands slid along her sides to her back and he unclasped her bra to pull the straps down and off her arms. He ran his hands down her arms and then up her sides, stopping when his thumbs met the underside of her breasts. "God, you're beautiful," he whispered and watched her face as he brushed his thumbs over her already hardened nipples.

Her mouth fell open in a wordless, "Oh" that became a hiss when he bent his head to pull her right nipple into his mouth. Her hands found his hair and she arched into him as he teased her. He bit gently on a nipple, increasing the pressure until she groaned and pulled back, forcing him to let her go.

He smiled and brought his hand up to gently sooth the assaulted breast as he bent his head to the other one.

Dani moved to straddle him and lowered herself across his lap. When he raised his head from her breast she found his lips with her own and he groaned loudly when she started to move against his erection. She smiled when he tried to still her hips with his hands, and instead she gave him a gentle push and forced him backward onto the bed. She leaned over him, letting her hair create a curtain around his head and smiling down at him when he smiled as she moved her head side to side. Her hair dragged over his face and neck teasing him before she moved it back over her shoulder.

He chuckled. "Oh, you are so taking advantage of what I told you." He let his hands slide up her back and tease along the sides of her breasts.

She smiled down at him as she sat up. She bit her lip and nodded. "Did you think I wouldn't?" Her hands slid down his chest to the fly of his jeans and she raked her nails over his erection. When his fingers rolled her nipples she moaned and pressed into his palms. "Oh god, yes."

"Shit…" He thrust up against the sensation with a soft groan of anticipation. He watched as she undid the button and slid the zipper down. When she dragged her index finger across the tip causing him to shudder he thought he would die. "Dani, you're going to kill me."

"You say that all the time." She moaned and started stroking him. "Have I ever told you how sexy you are?" She asked as she watched herself stroke his cock.

His jeans were still half confining him and he wanted them off. He wanted her jeans off. He wanted her under him. He knew this wasn't how he wanted to get where they were going. He told her, he wanted to taste every inch of her. He reached for her hand, pulled it away from his cock.

"Come here," he whispered quietly as he pulled her gently down to lie across his chest. He pressed light kisses to the tip of each of her fingers. Then another kiss to the center of her palm before swirling his tongue in a slow circle, his eyes on Dani's the entire time.

Dani's breath caught in her throat. It was such a simple touch, yet it went directly to her very core. Her eyes drifted shut as his mouth continued to her wrist, again pausing to taste her with his tongue. He continued his way up her arm, with lips and tongue, occasionally the scrape of teeth and light touches from his fingertips. When he reached her shoulder, he rolled to his side, laying her face-up beside him.

"You still with me?" He asked, brushing her hair from her face and feathering light touches along her hairline to the shell of her ear, which he traced with his fingers.

Dani slowly opened her eyes and nodded. She was amazed yet again that he could make her feel so something so different. Her voice sounded thick when she answered, "My god, Nico that feels so good."

He gave her a cocky smile and bent to kiss her softly, "Do you want me to stop?" He asked lightly, even as his lips trailed across her eyelids and his tongue traced just behind her ear.

"Please don't." her words where barely a whisper as she moved her head toward his mouth. He smiled and feathered more kisses across her face; soft kisses to her cheeks, her nose and then the caress of his tongue across her lips.

Lips and tongue then trailed down the curve of her neck, small, light bites on her shoulder. Fingertips danced down her arms, and back up to play lightly over her breasts. Nico watched as her nipples peaked and begged for his mouth. He breathed barely there kisses around each one, a fingertip, a tongue. His tongue found each rib in turn. He paused at each freckle and mole, lightly touching, teasing, tasting. He marveled at each gasp and groan that she rewarded him with when he found a particularly sensitive spot. He knew those spots, he had them memorized and he was sure to hit every one of them.

He continued his path, blazing the trail with the delicate caress of his fingertips, barely there kisses and the moist wetness of his tongue. He spent time at her navel, enjoying the way she squirmed and sighed. Then his fingers found their way to the button of her jeans and he undid it slowly while running his fingers ever so softly under the waistband. He opened the zipper and paused to tease with his fingers and lips.

Dani was beginning to have a difficult time staying still. He had driven her mad with need. She felt as if every inch of her skin had a direct path to her clit. She moved her hips in frustration, feeling as if she'd never been this aroused before, but knowing that wasn't true. Shit this man always made her feel that way. But this time she was amazed by the fact that he had barely touched her in the places that usually begged for attention. He'd barely touched her in ways that recently got her hot. She opened her eyes to watch as he pulled her jeans down her legs and she couldn't help the deep moan when he smiled wickedly up at her as he knelt by her feet on the bed.

His fingernails lightly scored the tops of her feet and he watched her face as the sensation shot up her legs and her eyes drifted closed. He dragged his fingertips up her calves to her knees and then back down. He stretched out on the bed and pressed a kiss to her ankles before moving to press kisses up her legs. His tongue swirled and teased its way higher until he bent her knees and teased the soft underside of each, kissing and licking gently even as his fingers drifted higher.

Calloused fingertips traced lazy circles on the tops on Dani's thighs before fingernails left light tracks down the insides. When she moaned, low and deep in her throat, he smiled with potent male satisfaction, but continued moving, upward…closer and her desperate movement and soft sounds only increased. He could hear her soft panting when he reached her wet curls. He looked up at her. "What do you want baby?" He let his finger drift over her with barely there, soft as rain touches.

Dani's hands slid into his hair, "Nico…what you're doing to me…my god…please."

Nico leaned up and rained soft touches across her belly before drifting downward. "I know what I'm doing, I asked what you wanted?" He smiled up at her from between her legs and waited. He let one finger slide over her clit and down between her wet slit and then while she watched he tasted his finger. He moaned. It was pure torture. He wanted more. He was pressed himself against the bed in an attempt to relieve some of the ache. She was so beautiful. He watched her writhe on the bed. "Just say it Danielle and it's yours."

God she hated when he did this. She looked at him. "Please…go down on me, please I want your mouth on my pussy." Dani's drifted shut and her head fell back to the bed. But her eyes opened when Nico didn't touch her after several seconds. Her voice was heavy and she sounded confused, "What…Nico please?"

She caught his eyes. The emotion in them shocked her. It took her breath away. His vulnerability and the wonder and love she saw was something she didn't think she'd seen before. She pushed up on one elbow, gasped and then held out her hand to him.

He took it and leaned up to kiss her. He brushed his lips across her ear and whispered softly, "Shh, I love you:

_i fear no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want  
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)  
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant  
and whatever a sun will always sing is you._

He smiled when Dani moaned his name just before he kissed her, biting her bottom lip gently, before he sat back on his knees. He used the back of his hand traced down over each breast and lower. He teased between her legs and then back up to her hip before he bent to kiss each hip. He ran his tongue down to where her curls began, but he didn't give her what she wanted, not yet. Not even when she whimpered and her hips lifted toward his mouth.

He shifted, moved to lie between her legs again and he almost moaned when her soft whimper turned to a moan and she gripped his comforter as he breathed out against her wetness. He slid his hands beneath her ass to lift her into a better position and then finally as he watched her face, he lowered his mouth to her. He used his tongue to dart out, and he barely touched her. Then he pressed a soft kiss where her thigh met her labia, tongue and lips, soft and feathery.

When her hands found his hair and she groaned loudly, "Please, Nico…please…" he finally gave in and lowered his mouth to her clit. She arched against him as he pulled her swollen clit into his mouth and gently suckled. His tongue teased, trailing down and inside her, tasting and tormenting while pushing her closer and closer to the edge. He used his tongue to flick over her clit over and over and then he pulled on it, teased and flicked before fucking her with his tongue again.

Nico was lost. Her small, desperate sounds and the taste of her on his tongue were almost more than he could handle. He ground himself against the bed and answered her moan with his own. He needed her badly. Teasing her had aroused him as much as it had her. His thumbs spread her open and his tongue ran her length, pushing her closer. He shifted his hands and eased a finger inside her. He fucked her with it to the rhythm of his tongue on her clit. He felt the slight quiver in her thighs and he knew she was close. He felt her pulse around his finger and he listened as her breathing changed. He knew what to look for, he knew the way she bit her lip and arched her neck and he smiled as suddenly she was there, falling over the edge, gripping his hair and calling his name.

He continued stroking her slowly, letting her come down. He dragged his tongue slowly over her a few more times before raising his head to look up at her. He smiled. "You look like Onyx does when leave my cereal bowl on the counter and answer the phone."

She purred and stretched as she reached for him. "Mmm, but I want to be scratched too." She snuggled against Nico's chest as he slid up beside her. She raked her nails over his nipples. "Oh my god that was just…oh my god."

He tilted her head to his and kissed her. His mouth and tongue taking their time with hers as his teeth nipped and tongues danced and fought. Their lips pressed and the came apart. It started slow and lazy, but it escalated quickly and he moaned, rolled and pressed himself against her belly. "Dani…I am wearing too many clothes." He laughed, it was her line and since his jeans were open, but still on he thought it appropriate.

She giggled and started pushing the denim down his hips. "I agree. Off, get them off." When he lifted his hips and she pulled them down she continued. "Mm, much better." She ran her hands up his legs and took a hold of him. She watched his face while she stroked him. She bent over him and licked the tip, her tongue swirling around and around.

Nico watched her and moaned. He knew she was going to and she didn't disappoint him because it was exactly what he wanted her to do as well. She held him at the base and let her tongue slide over the underside back and forth and then around as she bobbed up and down and then sucked hard as she took him deep. She did this for as long as he could stand it and then he moaned and pulled her up. "Stop baby…god you have to." He gripped the base of his cock and prayed for control. This woman was threatening it. She did that to him. This was a different kind. He smiled, god that would be humiliating.

Dani was straddling him and giving him a look. "What baby? Condoms are in the drawer." He pointed.

She cocked an eyebrow and leaned down to kiss him. Then kissed to his ear. "I'm on the pill, I'm clean. I hate those fucking things?" She sat back up and waited. "It's up to you, I can show you test results if you…"

He moved so fast she made a funny noise. She was straddling him one second and then the next thing she knew she was underneath him and he was inside her. "Fuck." He pulled out completely and slid back inside slow and deep. "Fuck." He pressed his forehead to hers and smiled. Then he kissed her. "I love you so much." He moved then, a steady in and out.

Dani giggled. "Oh my god…" She arched up under him and gripped his shoulders as she moved with him. "I love you too." Her nails raked down his back and she moaned when increased his pace and shifted one of his knees to change his angle. "Oh…fuck yes…"

Nico wasn't going to be able to hold out. He was close, but he knew Dani was also. He slid a hand between them and stroked her. He felt her tense around him and she moaned. "That's it baby, come on Dani…I need you to cum."

She panted and strained with him. She was close and she felt his desperation. She could see it on his face, feel it in the way he was moving. She grabbed his arms. "Oh...shit, oh…" He knew exactly how to touch and where to touch…she moaned and then her hands slid to her breasts and she rolled her nipples as he played her clit.

He smiled and fucked into her, harder, faster. He watched her pull her nipples and he pressed against her pubic bone and he saw her face, felt her clamp around him.

"Yes…fuck, don't stop…right there." Dani fell apart, flew and she gasped and moaned as Nico pounded into her to catch up.

It didn't take him long. Four or five more strokes and he emptied himself deep inside her. He moaned loudly, her name whispered and then he collapsed on top of her. He panted, then pressed a kiss to her cheek before just rolling them both to the side.

Dani lay there and wondered. She wondered what all this meant. She didn't know for sure, but tonight meant something. Something between them changed or was about to. She wish she knew exactly what that change was.


	26. Moving Toward Normal

_**NOTE:**_ Posting this late, yes I know, but it's getting posted that's what counts. There are probably tons of typos...excuse them. You know the deal I don't use a beta because it would take twice as long to get shit done. This is more of a breather chapter...you need these now and then. Nothing much happens. Things slow down. We need some pacing people ;) Some days things are boring. _  
_

Personally, for those who care, my thing is better! I have my fingers and toes crossed that it stays that way. It will make me much happier.

For those who read and review- a big thank you. I appreciate you all.

FYI: Anyone looking for **Nico Does a Bad, Bad Thing**, the powers that be have removed it. Just that one...most likely because someone complained. Why that and nothing else I wrote since it all contains the same subject matter I don't know, but alas I was spanked and put in the corner on my knees. My account was suspended for a few days. I have been warned. So, if I suddenly disappear that would be why. If I do go find me on Archive of our own under the same user name I have here. So that's at www . archiveofourown . com and as SciFiRN. Right now only **Nico Does a Bad, Bad Thing** is up, but I'll get the rest there too.

* * *

**Moving Toward Normal**

He woke up disoriented to a soft buzz and for a few seconds he wasn't sure where he was. He blinked and saw the familiar curve of his footboard and then a feminine sigh beside him reminded him of the night. Then he heard the buzzing again, which was what woke him to begin with, and he realized it was the vibration of his phone on the nightstand. He slid, reached over Dani and grabbed the phone.

He glanced at the screen and frowned as he accepted the call and fell back onto his pillow. "Careles."

"So, you mind telling me where you were last night?" Ben Carson bit out.

"Since it involves my personal life, yes." Nico dropped a hand over his eyes and rubbed his temples. "Are you accusing me of something? Do you need me to come down to the station? Did you find Ken Ellis? Please tell me you did so I can send my men home."

Ben snorted. "Like you don't know."

"Is he in custody or not Ben?" He smiled.

"You don't know? Really?" Ben sounded confused.

"I'm asking you aren't I?"

There was a pause, a sigh and then Ben answered. "You know I've called you several times over the past few hours. You haven't answered, but your phone's been there, your car's been there."

"You've had me followed?" Nico smirked and pushed himself into a sitting position. "Really?"

"No, we just checked when you didn't answer, just to be sure you were… available. If you didn't answer this time we were going to send someone to your apartment." He said something to someone. "Look, the Ellis kid says he went looking for the Santino boy and he tried to strong arm the kid into making his sister back off. Only Santino, well he's pretty tough and he knocked the kid down, there was a scuffle and Ray Jr. called some reinforcements in and well between your girl, that tall piece of ass…Veronica Navarro and Ray Jr., well we have Kenneth Ellis back in custody."

"Good. I'll call my men off the room, send them home to their own families." Nico waited, he could tell Ben wasn't done talking.

"Yea, well funny thing is Ken has confessed. I mean full confession. Told us things we didn't even know. You know he was in on those other videos? We didn't. You know the Harper boys were trading drugs for the services of those girls? You know they were drugging them? You know Ken helped drug Lindsay?"

Nico was shaking his head. "Can't say I did Ben, but sounds like he's not going anywhere now that he confessed, I doubt Daddy can even get him out now."

There was a snort. "You're probably right, and you're telling me you had nothing to do with this?"

"You said I was home. I had Thai food last night with Dr. Santino and then we made love in my bed. Would you like the sheet for DNA testing?"

"Don't be an ass Nico." He waited another couple of seconds. "I guess we have the asshole. He did it along with the Harper kids. I should be thankful. Ends, not means and all…"

"Logic is sound on that. Was there anything else you needed then Ben?" Nico was done with the conversation.

"No, I think that's it. You have a good day and tell Dr. Santino the same."

"I will." He hung up with a long sigh and let his hand fall to the bed. He looked over to find Dani watching him. He rolled to his side and smiled. "Good morning, Ben Carson says have a good day."

She squinted at him. "Ben Carson called to see how involved you were with Ken Ellis and you somehow managed to not lie to him. Impressive."

"All I did was avoid answering his questions." He used a finger to brush hair from her face. "Did you sleep okay?"

She stretched and moved closer to him so she curl against him and rest her head on his chest. "Mm, yea, pretty good." She bent her knee and ran her toes up the inside of his leg and threaded an arm over his belly. "You?"

He had, once he finally fell asleep. "Eventually, yes." He pulled her against him. "It just took me a bit to get there." He inhaled the scent of her shampoo and let the weight of her body against him remind him that she was there with him. He had to get to work today and he knew it. He lifted his phone from the bed to check the time. "It's six thirty. I need to get to work today Dani."

She nodded. "I know, Thursday you should and we need to get things moving forward." She lifted her head from his chest. "Will I see you tonight?"

"Do you want to?"

She looked around his room for a second. "I wish there was a way to move you closer." She smiled. "I know it's early in the relationship and all, but I like you around more than just the weekends."

He winked at her. "Well, we'll figure this out." He hugged her. "Come one, let's get moving. I have to get you back to the hospital and then me to work."

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Nico walked Dani up to Lindsay's room, only to find it was empty. They checked at the nurses' station.

The clerk checked the computer and nodded before looking up at them. "She was transferred to the rehab floor about an hour ago."

Dani smiled. It was good news and she gripped Nico's hand. "Could you tell me the room number and how to get there?"

The woman checked the screen. "It's room two forty six. " She looked up again. "Take this elevator down one floor, go left until you come to the main hall, there's a big reception desk so you can't miss it. There's a bank of elevators directly across from the desk. Take one of the ones on the right, not the left. You want the second floor. When you get off, two forty is on your right…I think, but there's a nurses' desk there on that floor you can check at."

Nico nodded. "Down one floor, left to main reception, elevators on right, down one more floor and you think go right to room two forty six."

She nodded and her eyebrows drew up. "Is that what I said?"

Someone cleared a throat behind them. "Excuse me; is there anything I can do to help you?"

Dani and Nico turned to see a man in his thirties with facial piercings. A quick glance at his name tag showed that he was the hospital chaplain.

He held out his hand. "I'm Greg." He pointed to his nametag and leaned a bit closer. "I'm the chaplain."

Nico took his hand. He'd seen him around. "Nico. We're heading to room two four six."

Greg glanced to Dani and nodded. He leaned over desk and tilted the computer screen toward him despite the woman's protesting and her slapping his hand while she laughed at him. "So, Lindsay Santino, sad little thing, but she's kick ass strong I think." He stood back up and motioned with his head toward the elevator. "Come on I'll take you guys down there." He waved to the desk. "Thanks Ruth, I'll bring you up some coffee later. The good kind okay?" He lowered his voice. "Gotta keep her happy or she'll kill me." He held his hand to Dani when they got to the elevators. "So, you're Lindsay's mom? She said you were tiny, but vicious." He winked at her. "And Nico, you were the guy who saved her." He looked the man up and down. "Military, what branch?"

Nico shook his head at him. "What the hell is up with you?"

Greg laughed. "Nothing man, I'm simply a chaplain and I'm taking you to see that girl downstairs." He gave Nico a look and shook his head before he turned to Dani. "He always like this?"

The elevator doors opened and they went inside. Dani laughed and nodded. "Always, and you have to admit you are different for a chaplain?" She looked at him again. "Did you serve?"

He raised his eyebrow and shook his head as he faced the two of them. "No, Army brat, but never served." He leaned his back into the corner. "Just like to study, so I teach, hang out here, preach on Sunday…" When the doors opened he backed out of the elevator with a flourish. "Third floor, please move to your left and watch your step."

Nico snorted. "Oh my god this man is insane." He shot Dani a glance and added under his breath. "He would have been out on an old fashioned section eight if he would have served." He moved with Dani toward the other elevators. "Greg I'm pretty sure we can figure it out from here."

He smiled. "Hey, I was on my way to see Lindsay anyway; see if she wanted some coffee."

Dani wrapped her arm around Nico's. "Stop, he's sweet and I like him."

Nico pressed the button on the proper elevators and the three of them rode down to the second floor while Greg hummed and drummed a beat on the thigh of his torn jeans.

Nico chuckled and rubbed the forehead.

Greg looked at him as the doors opened. "What? Don't like music?" He pointed in the right direction and headed that way.

"No, I'm just trying to figure out what kind of chaplain listens to Rob Zombie."

"White Zombie, but it's an easy mistake to make, the early stuff sounds similar to the later stuff." He shot Nico a smile. "Nice pick up either way man because to tell you the truth I don't see you as the type to have Hellbilly Deluxe in your collection let alone La Sexorcisto."

They turned a corner and then he stopped in front of a room. "Room two-hundred and forty six." He smiled and stepped to the side to let them enter.

Dani smiled at him. "Thanks, are you coming in?"

He shook his head. "I'll stop in later since you guys just got here, but let her know I said hello." He squeezed Dani's hand. "She has my card too if she needs to talk. You could call too." He looked at Nico. "I even talk to ornery ex-soldiers." He waved and then he was gone.

Dani knocked on the door before she moved inside. "You decent Linds? Nico's with me."

"Mom? Where have you been and yes."

Dani and Nico found Lindsay sitting up in a chair. Dani squatted down beside her and pulled her daughter into her arms. "Lindsay, baby…" She hugged Lindsay to her chest. "We got him baby. The police have Ken. He's in jail again and he's not getting out this time." She kissed her cheek.

"Thank god…" Lindsay hugged her back and smiled. "Is that where you went?" She looked around her mom. "Nico, you okay?"

"Yea, I took off to make sure he wouldn't hurt you again." He smiled and sat down in the chair across from her. "I'm good kiddo. How's the foot?"

She nodded. "Better. I'm doing some therapy." She moved the foot and winced. "Hurts like hell, but home by Saturday they said." She looked happy. "Thank you by the way."

"Juliette will be thrilled you two can hang out together." He took her hand. "You're welcome Linds."

She squeezed his hand and nodded. "Oh god me too, I can't wait to get home and see her. The food here sucks." She leaned her head back against her chair and his coat. "And I want my bed."

He smiled at her and released her hand. "I know how that feels." He stood back up and kissed her forehead. "I need to get to work."

She blinked. "You'll be back right, later?" She grabbed the coat she was sitting on.

He nodded. "Sure, I'll stop back after work." He glanced to Dani. "I'll check in with you later." He held his hand out to her. "If you need me, you know how to get a hold of me."

She took his hand and stood. She didn't hesitate to hug him. "Yes. I can find you."

He kissed her. "I'll have Ronnie drop your car off. Do you have your keys?"

She nodded. "Yea, hang on, I'll get them for you." She dug through her purse to find her keys and then handed them to Nico. "While you have them, feel free to make a copy of the house key." She added shyly. "You might as well."

He smiled at her. "I just might do that then." He held up her keys and then put them in his pocket. "I'll call you later Dani."

"Good." She leaned close and whispered. "I love you."

He whispered it back and then he slid out the door.

Dani took the chair he'd been in and leaned back against it with a sigh. She looked at her daughter. "Are you okay Linds? Really?"

She shrugged. "I don't know yet mom. I feel okay sometimes and then a minute later I'm terrified and I'm not even sure why. Then I'm so angry I want to hurt someone." She felt the tears and pressed her eyes closed.

Dani took her daughter's hands. "I know baby and that's normal."

Lindsay opened her eyes and nodded. She bit her lip and tears ran down her cheeks as she nodded. "Is the guilt normal and feeling so shamed and dirty normal?" She looked out the window beside her. "I mean it makes me feel so hollow inside, like something is missing or they took it away."

Dani wished she could make it better, but she couldn't. She felt her own tears. "Oh baby…I can tell you what you're feeling is normal. I can tell you that you aren't dirty and that you are strong and you can only let them have what you give, but they did take something and it hurts. But the feelings, they're real and no matter what I tell you, that's how you actually feel. It will get better."

Lindsay nodded. She didn't want to burden her mother. She knew her mother felt bad about this already. "I'm sorry mom…"

"For what baby?" She pulled her closer. "You didn't do anything wrong."

"For putting this on you, I have the counselor's number and I'm going to call her…I just haven't yet."

Dani nodded. "Talking to someone would be good, and it might be easier if it wasn't me, but you don't have to."

She wrapped her arms around herself and pulled the wool over her shoulders. It soothed her some. She tucked her good foot under her thigh and shifted in the chair so her cheek rested against the back. She sighed and continued to stare out the window. It was overcast and she had a decent view of a field from this room. The leaves were changing and the wind was blowing. It suited her mood. "I think I want to. I've just been…I don't know." She shrugged. "It's hard."

Dani didn't say anything, she just nodded. She knew what Lindsay meant because she understood how hard it was. She didn't want to push her daughter and wanted her to heal on her own terms. "If and when you're ready baby…"

Lindsay nodded and took a breath. She watched a couple cross the path in the field holding hands and then she looked away. She glanced at her mom. "So mom, how are things with Nico? I mean you two are moving kinda fast."

Dani sort of expected questions from her kids about Nico, but not this soon. She figured they were fair. She nodded. "I guess it looks that way, yes."

"Mom, you barely broke it off with Matt." Lindsay reached for her water and took a long sip, watching her mother the entire time. "Now, Nico's sleeping in your room." She squinted. "You don't think that's fast?"

Dani pushed her anger down and kept her tone even. She tried not to smirk as she noticed that her daughter had inherited her squint. "Okay, fair enough and you want honesty?"

Lindsay sat up a bit and nodded. "Yes, I'm old enough to handle honest."

Dani smirked now and shook her head. She wasn't sure, but okay. "Fine." She sat back and crossed her arms. "The first night I met Matt I went to bed with him." She watched Lindsay's eyes go wide and her mouth drop open. "Yes Linds, your father and I had just divorced and I was lonely. Matt stumbled into my path and told me I was sexy. It was right after your father had cheated on me and I know you don't want to hear that, but it's what happened. So, I ended up in his bed." She gave Lindsay an open look. "It's not good, and it's not right and it probably wasn't the smartest thing I'd ever done. I know it wasn't the best decision and I'd tell you not to make the same one, but it happened and the next thing I knew I was working for the Hawks. Hell, it's how I got introduced to the Hawks."

"Oh my god mom, you didn't?!"

"I just told you I did." Dani frowned. "I ended up spending the next few months fighting the physical attraction I felt for him. I made the decision that If we were going to work together I we weren't going to be sleeping together." She sighed.

Lindsay giggled. "Oh no, you put him back into the friend zone."

Dani gave her a funny look. "The what?"

"The friend zone…you know, the no sex zone. It's where guys are when you aren't having sex with them. If you date and have sex and then stop dating, they end up back in the friend zone. Some of them try to stay in the benefit zone, but from my friends they hate being banished back to the friend zone…they don't get it." She shrugged. "So you sent him back to the friend zone. I doubt he liked it." She laughed again.

Dani shook her head. "No, he didn't like it, but to be honest baby, neither did I. I mean we tried to just be friends, but I was never sure if we were friends because I found him hot and just couldn't stop thinking about him naked or if we really would have been friends without that." She rolled her eyes and giggled with Lindsay. It was good to lighten things up and see her daughter smile. She took a breath and continued. "Eventually, I ended up breaking my rule and fell into bed with Matt again. It shouldn't have happened, but it did. And during that time, there was Nico, a guy who I noticed, but wasn't interested in and to be honest, at the time- I found him a little creepy." She smiled and shook her head at the thought. Had she really found him creepy? She rubbed her arms and sighed and then glanced at her daughter. "I'm not really sure why I'm telling you all this Lindsay." She shrugged and then leaned forward some. "I want you to understand some of it. There's a difference between Matt and Nico and it's important."

Lindsay nodded. "Ooookaaaay."

Dani rolled her eyes. "Well, over time Linds, Nico proved himself trustworthy, honest, funny, dependable, a great listener and an excellent friend. He was there when I needed him. If I called, he came and I started to rely on him. I still didn't think of him all that much romantically, but I noticed him." She paused and took a breath. Her mouth was open and she wet her lips with a little gasp. "God, the man is sexy as sin in a way that Matt isn't and I started to notice he is other things that Matt wasn't…like dependable, loyal and not a liar or a cheat."

Dani took a breath. "He also never pressured me to do things I didn't want." She looked at her daughter. "He never would."

Lindsay's eyebrows drew together. "What did Matt pressure you for and did he cheat on you?"

"He wants a baby Linds and I don't. I don't want to start another family." She exhaled harshly. "Do you want a baby in the house?"

"God no!"

"Exactly." She rubbed her arms. "And yes, he cheated on me baby…well not really, since we technically weren't together, but when I needed him he wasn't there for me." She smiled and looked at her daughter. "Nico is always there for me. He always has been."

"Oh, okay…" She hesitated and then looked at her mother. "So you've been in love with him for a while?"

Dani nodded. "I didn't really know it, but yes. The whole time I was with Matt I think part of it was based on the physical. The relationship started that way, but with Nico we were friends and then the physical part started."

She gave her mother a hard look. "You don't have to explain everything to me Mom. I liked Matt, but I like Nico too. I like him a lot and I trust him so much." She smiled. "After what he did for me…" Her voice trailed off and Lindsay's gaze returned to the window.

"I know baby." Dani took her daughter's hand. She understood the emotion. "I know."

There was a quick knock on the door and then the door swung open. "Lindsay, hey you have hydrotherapy now."

Dani looked at the nurse. "She'll be ready in a couple of minutes."

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Nico made it into the Hawks complex and halfway past Matt's office before he heard his name. He ignored it. He made it completely past Matt's office before the other man was in the hallway.

"Nico, hey I asked how Dani was." Donnally stepped up beside him and put a hand on his shoulder. "What's going on? You've been out of the office for most of the week with barely an explanation and she's not answering her phone. I assume the two are connected somehow." He gave Nico an aggravated and accusatory look.

He sighed and looked at Matt as he turned and crossed his arms over his chest. He knew the security team would have kept everything quiet. He looked Matt in the eye. "Lindsay Santino was kidnapped, tortured and sexually assaulted. I tracked her down. I've been helping Dani and making sure she stayed safe until all the suspects were apprehended."

Matt's jaw came unhinged and then anger filled his eyes and his jaw ground together. "Why didn't anyone contact me? Why didn't I know what was going on?" He mirrored Nico's posture and crossed his arms. "Is Lindsay okay? Is Dani okay? Where are they? Do they need anything?"

"Lindsay is at St. Joe's and she hurt her foot trying to escape. She had surgery and is in therapy. It will take time to recover. Emotionally, she's shook up." He wiped a hand over his face. "It was hell for her. Dani is with her, she's hanging in there and I think they'll be okay."

He snorted. "You think so?" He moved toward his office talking over his shoulder. "You should have let someone here know. She's an asset, it's your job to keep us apprised of problems as they arise." He pulled his jacket from the hook by the door and slipped it on.

"Where the hell are you going?" Nico already knew the answer, but he wanted to hear Matt say it. He moved to the door.

"To talk to Dani and see if she needs anything." He glared at Nico. He stopped in front of Nico who was now blocking his door. "Move."

"She doesn't need anything from you. She's fine Donnally, trust me this is not going to go well for you."

Matt snorted and shook his head. "You don't know her like I do Nico. You just think you do. You barely started fucking her." He spit the words in Nico's face. "That's not a relationship, it's sex. We were almost engaged."

Nico smiled at him coolly and stepped to side. "Have it your way Donnally. Lindsay's on the second floor room two forty six. Dani should be with her, but you have her number." He didn't bother keeping the smirk off his face. Like Matt had said, Dani hadn't bothered returning his calls or texts. "Before you go, is there anything I need to know?"

Matt nodded. "You're wanted upstairs. There's a problem with the sale and you might need to talk to Juliette." He frowned at Nico and his eyebrows pulled together. He was confused. Shouldn't Nico be trying to keep him from seeing Dani? "She needs to sign a proxy for the league to move forward with the sale."

"A proxy? Marshall signed all the papers."

"Talk to the lawyers , check upstairs. Hank has more info and tell him I'll be back in a couple of hours." He moved around Nico was gone.

Nico watched him go and then moved up the stairs to Griffen's office. Hank was on the phone, but waved him in. He sank into one of the leather chairs, not across from the desk, but by the door and he waited. While he did, he pulled his phone out and texted Dani.

_Ran into Matt, he is coming to see you._

_Why?_

_He knows you. I don't. We are just fucking._

_LOL! I don't want to deal with him right now._

_I am sorry. I love you._

_I love you. You aren't worried he is seeing me?_

_No, I trust you and you know what and who you want._

_Yes. You. _

_I know baby. Talk later. _

_Ok_

Nico glanced up and watched sighed. Griffen was in no major hurry to finish his phone call, so he checked his email, answered the few that were marked urgent, deleted what could be deleted and sent back a quick reply to AJ on something he had the answer to. He heard Hank wrapping up his phone call about then so he pocketed the phone and looked over at the desk.

Hank was standing, leaning against his desk as he ended his call. "I'll get back with you just as soon as the details are finalized. I'm sure we can get Ms. Pittman's signature within a day or two….The offer is more than acceptable to the league, but we do need her approval of course….Yes, I'm sure. That shouldn't be a problem. I'll call you by Monday then. Bye." He was smiling as he hung up and then he turned and faced Nico.

"Mr. Careles."

"Hank." Nico crossed his left leg over his right casually and spread his arm over the back of the chair. He waited. "Matt said you wanted to see me."

Hank frowned; he found the man's casualness inappropriate at times. "I want to talk to you about Miss. Pittman. We have a small problem."

Nico surveyed the man's face. He got the impression that the league had a problem. He doubted that the problem actually involved him. He shifted forward and rested his elbows on his knees. "Go on."

Griffen sighed. "Before Marshall Pittman died he signed a form, a proxy that gave the league the right to act as the de facto owner of the Hawks for purposes of the sale. Now that he's dead, ownership has passed to his daughter and that proxy is no longer valid. The league can't act as de facto owner since Juliette Pittman is the actual owner of the Hawks, which means that unless she signs the proper paperwork. The sale cannot move forward."

Nico tried to keep the smile off his face. He really didn't like Hank Griffen at all. He was an arrogant ass. He nodded. "So you want me to do what?"

Hank stared at Nico like he had suddenly grown a second head. "I want you to have her sign the proxy form." He pulled a manila envelope from his desk and moved to where Nico sat. He held it out and waited. When Nico took it, he continued. "She signs it and we continue as planned."

"What if she won't sign?" Nico tapped the envelope against his knee. Before Hank could open his mouth he continued. "I'm not saying she won't, but she is a Pittman and she is stubborn. She may decide she doesn't want to."

His eyes narrowed and something sinister filtered through them. "Then convince her it is in her best interest that she does." He turned back to his desk and collapsed into his chair. "Isn't that what you do? Persuade people, Mr. Careles?"

Nico stood. "Only when it's in the best interest of the team Hank." He held up the envelope. "Do you mind telling me who the buyer is?"

Hank nodded. "At the moment we don't have one lined up. The last two buyers backed out. We've had trouble with Mr. King and then with Razor. We seem to be running into a good bit of it lately." He sighed. "The last one interested moved off when he found out about Marshall Pittman's death. He felt it was a bad omen. So, will you have her sign the papers? I think it will go a long way in assuring a prospective buyer that things are settling down over here. Now that we have a new running back on the payroll and Mr. King is well on his way at rehab I think there's a good chance we can get good offers."

Nico took a couple steps toward the door. "I have the form. I'll see Miss Pittman tomorrow."

Hank smiled. "Excellent…that's good, I expect the form on my desk by Monday then. We have a game Monday. I assume whatever busy you've been attending to has been wrapped up?" His eyebrow rose. "You've been neglecting your work here."

Nico shook his head. "My work here is to protect the assets of the team. I've been doing my job. Reports have been on your desk," He gave the other man an innocent look. "Maybe you've been too preoccupied to read them?"

He frowned and pulled the red folder from the bottom of a pile. He opened it and the daily security reports were inside. He grunted. "I see." He read through them quickly. "Dr. Santino's daughter was kidnapped?" There was a bit of concern in his voice.

"Yes, she was recovered. As you can tell the team included Tommy, Ronnie and myself and as of right now the suspect are all in police custody." He waited as Hank looked over the report. "Miss Santino is in the hospital and is expected to be released tomorrow or Saturday. She should make a complete recovery."

Hank gave him an anxious glance. "You kept this from the media?"

Of course, the league would be concerned about its image. Nico tried not to sneer. A young girl was assaulted, but the league will come out looking okay, that's all that counted. "Her name has been withheld since she's a minor. The official new report is that the police apprehended the suspects after her brother reported her missing and clues from a Facebook message and cellphone signals led them to the old mill."

"Good, good, be sure Dr. Santino and her daughter are given whatever they need of course." He nodded, basically dismissing Nico as he looked back at the schedule on his desk.

Nico didn't question it. He simply turned and with a swoosh of his overcoat he was gone. He jogged down the stairs and found his way to his office. He sighed heavily and pulled his coat off. He hung it on the hook and rolled up his sleeves before he fell into the chair behind his desk. He booted his computer and entered his password as he started his duties for the day.

He sat back in the chair and thought. He had been under the impression that the sale of the team was a done deal, but now that changed. He wondered what Juliette would want. Would she want to keep the team? She loved the team. It was the one thing she did with her father that Gabby never quite got. He smiled and wondered what the league would think about a continuation of the Pittman era. She would be the youngest owner in league history. He picked up the phone and dialed his lawyer. He'd have them contact hers. This wasn't something he could decide for her and it wasn't something she should decide without legal and financial consultation. It was a billion dollar asset. He'd do the leg work, have them put the numbers together so when he brought it up she knew exactly where the team stood. He'd pull the teams financials himself before he left.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Dani read the same paragraph in the magazine for the fourth time and then gave up. She was distracted by Nico's texts. She finally shoved the thing to the side and stood. She moved to the window and wrapped her arms around herself. She watched the wind blow leaves across the field as rain fell from the sky.

Lindsay had been gone about thirty minutes and they'd told her she'd been gone for about two hours. They were doing intensive therapy before discharge. She would do four hours a day divided by lunch and it was just about ten thirty now. She wondered when Matt would show, not that she wanted to see him, but she knew he was coming. She smiled and glanced at the texts again as she shook her head. Nico made her laugh. He didn't hide a thing about what Matt had said and it was refreshing.

There was a knock.

"Dani." Matt's voice was followed by a hesitant step into the room.

She turned and gave him a small smile. "What are you doing here?" She knew, but she'd play along. She stayed by the window and leaned against the sill.

He moved into the room carrying a vase of flowers, a box of chocolates, stuffed monkey in a Hawks jersey wearing an eye patch and two helium balloons that screamed Get Well in Hawks blue and red. He held them up. "Nico gave us the update and I wanted to stop in and see Lindsay." He set the gifts down on the table by the bed. "Where is she?"

Dani motioned at the table. "That was really sweet Matt." She said genuinely touched by the gifts. "She's in therapy right now. She tore the hell out of the tendon, ligaments and muscle on the bottom of her foot."

Matt frowned. "We can get her in with the best outpatient therapists Dani, make sure she's getting the therapy she needs. We have the ultrasound therapy at the practice field to help with the nerve damage. I promise she'll get the best treatment there is." He moved to the window and reached out to pull her toward him.

She put a hand to his chest and raised a brow. "Whoa, there." She pushed against his chest and shook her head as she took a step back, or tried to. She was really against the window so she had nowhere to go. "I appreciate the help with the therapy, but what's going on here Matt." She kept her hand on his chest, but his hands were on her upper arms and she couldn't go anywhere.

"Nothing Dani, I just wanted to hug you. I'm worried about you. I wish you would have called me or you know, answered my calls. You weren't showing up at the office for meetings and we were worried." He snorted some. "Well, you and Nico weren't showing up, people were starting to talk."

She squinted at him and then shook off his hands until he did let go, then she moved away from the window toward the bed. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

Matt sighed and ran his hand through his hair in agitation. "Nothing…I don't know Danielle. I'm just confused." He sat down and bent forward over his knees. He looked up at her. "I don't understand how we can be so close, almost engaged. Hell, we would have been planning our wedding if we could have agreed on a baby." He shrugged. "And now you're in bed with another man."

She glared at him. "And before the, 'it's over' was barely out of my mouth, you were in bed with a reporter Matthew." She put her hands on her hips. "I called you. I fucking needed you and you couldn't even talk to me because she was in your bed." She snorted. "God you are obtuse."

He stood, anger sparkling in his eyes. "Do you love him Dani?" He took the two steps toward her and leaned over her. "Do you?"

She almost laughed at him, but she refrained. "I really don't have to answer that, but I will." She smiled at him, because talking about Nico made her smile. "I do Matt. I have for a long time. I love him."

He shook his head. "You're just saying that to hurt me."

"I'm not. I didn't want to admit it at first. I loved you and admitting that I loved him made what I felt for you feel counterfeit or somehow immature and I didn't want to do that, but eventually I had no choice. I had to give in." She shrugged. "I can't help the way I feel Matt. I love him."

He glared down at her and his hand raised and then he dropped it. "I want to hurt you right now."

"That is a totally understandable emotion at this point. What you do with it speaks to your character." She knew he wouldn't hurt her. She stood calmly in front of him and waited. "I know it hurts Matt. I was hurt when you blew me off that night I called you. I wanted to hurt you then, but I didn't." She took a step toward him and reached up to touch his cheek. "I'm sorry. I did love you. I still do, but not like that. Whatever happens from here is up to you." She stepped back and away.

Matt nodded stiffly. "Goodbye Dani. Let me know when Lindsay needs therapy. See you at the office." He started to leave and then turned, pulled her against him and bent over her. He pressed his lips to her forehead. "I love you too and if he hurts you I will hurt him back. I promise." He hugged her and then let her go before he hurried quickly out the door.

Dani stood there stunned and then she smiled and pulled her phone from the window sill where she'd left it.

_Matt just left. _

_How'd it go?_

_Not bad. He kissed me._

She smiled as she hit send. She waited for Nico's response. It didn't take long

_Do I need to kill him?_

Dani giggled.

_No, on forehead. He was good._

_So, only slap him. We need to talk later._

_About what?_

_Later, love u_

_Okay, love u 2_

Dani smiled and wondered what it was they needed to talk about, but then they always needed to talk about something. There was Juliette and Ray Jay still had a court case coming up. She sighed. There would be the criminal case for the boys involved with Lindsay's kidnapping. She rubbed her forehead. She was getting a headache.

Maybe she should consider talking to the counselor. It might help her sort out her own feelings. She picked up the card on the over bed table and glanced at the office number. It listed the second floor. She carried the card with her to the nurses' station and asked for directions. She was pointed to the Mental Health and Recovery wing and made her way to, "two lefts and one right, you can't miss it."

They were correct, it was easy to find with the mural on the wall just outside the wing covered with a rainbow, doves and all kinds of ridiculous recovery notions that gave Dani the heebie-jeebies. She must have had an odd look on her face as she glanced at the office numbers because she heard a vaguely familiar voice behind her.

"The paintjob get to you too?"

She turned to see the chaplain leaning against a doorway waving her into his office. She pointed at the card in her hand. "I was looking for," She glanced down, "Sarah Thacker, the counselor?"

He pointed to the office across the hall and two doors down. "She's not in though. She has a meeting until two. I can let her know you dropped by. I can check the scheduled and see if she has an opening then. Our schedules allow us to book for each other. Danielle right?"

Dani smiled and nodded. "Yes. If you can check, that would be great." She moved toward his office door while he slid around to his desk. She watched as he dropped into his seat, which was pretty much just an ergonomic stool.

He nodded and pecked at the keyboard. "She's available at two thirty." He looked over at her. "Do you want to meet her at the office or would you like her to come to Lindsay's room?"

Dani looked at the man across the messy desk. She had taken a few things in about his office including the psychiatry, theology and philosophy texts on his book shelf; she also noticed the two master's degrees on his wall. He had one in psychology and one in religious studies. Her eyes tracked to book shelf on the other side of his desk and she smiled. "Do you have time to talk right now?"

He followed her eyes. "Waiting to see what the doctorate was in before you asked?" His eyebrow shot up and he leaned over to grab the framed PhD. He handed it to her. "You want to inspect it? I actually have people ask if it's real you know?"

She shook her head. "I believe you. I still would like Dr. Thacker to see Lindsay though."

He put the framed degree from Harvard back on the shelf. "I liked research in applied psych, but not the actual practice and I found I really liked leading my flock more." He turned back to the computer and finished making the appointment. He hit the confirm button and smiled. "Okay, two thirty and Sarah will be there." He pointed to the two upholstered chairs in the corner of his small office. "It's a little more comfortable over there."

Dani nodded. "Sure." She stood and moved. She took the chair closest to the door. She sat. She pointed to her shoes. "Do you mind?"

Greg shook his head. "Hell no baby, take em off."

Dani rolled her eyes. "You don't really believe in boundaries do you?" She mumbled as she toed off her shoes and pulled her left foot up under her bottom.

He shrugged. "If you were my friend I'd say exactly what I just said. I'm the chaplain here, not the therapist. So…"

She smiled. "Ahh, a work around." She eyed him. "So you do counseling as part of your chaplaincy and use your applied psych degree in that aspect of your job, but deny that you do it."

"Exactly."

"Great."

He smiled and fiddled with the leather on his watch band. "So, what brings you to see me?"

Dani sighed. "I'm angry and confused. I don't know what to do with all of it right now and I wish I could help my daughter."

Greg watched Dani's face and he saw the emotions flicker through her eyes and her posture. He nodded. "You're hurt."

She bit back a smile and nodded. "Yes. I'm hurting…they took something from my daughter they had no right to. That hurts me that they hurt her and it makes me angry."

"Okay. What confuses you?" He crossed his ankles and leaned back in his chair casually.

Dani's eyebrows pulled together. What had her confused? "I…I'm not sure, but I feel it, ambiguity." She frowned. "I don't know."

He shook his head. "Is it true that you really don't know?" He watched her face. "You know the answer Danielle. You just aren't willing to admit it to yourself."

She glanced at him. "I think it's that I wanted him to do it." She sighed when she said it and a weight seemed to lift from her chest as tears filled her eyes. God, she really did want that kid dead. Her voice was barely a whisper. "I wanted him dead and I wanted Nico to do it." She wrapped her arms around herself and looked down at her lap.

Greg leaned forward with a box of tissues in his hand. He waited for Dani to take them. "I assume you're talking about one of the men who hurt your daughter and that somehow your boyfriend had opportunity to exact revenge and didn't." Even after Dani took the tissues he stayed bent forward with his elbows on his knees. He watched her dab her eyes. "You know it's a natural response to want revenge right?"

Dani nodded slowly, her eyes still on her lap. "But wanting it and then actually having opportunity and still wanting it are two different things." She looked up at him. "Aren't they?"

He smiled. "I don't think so. Most people don't have opportunity, so it's not an option. Tell me, are you angry at Nico for not doing it?" He raised an eyebrow and waited for the answer.

She gasped at the question. "God no." She shook her head. "I wouldn't want him to have that guilt for the rest of his life. I wouldn't want to lose him to jail or have him run from the law. No. I'd rather have him and my daughter than revenge and my daughter."

Greg nodded and sat back. "Then you didn't want revenge Danielle, you only wanted the opportunity for revenge, which you got. You feel you squandered it, but you didn't, because in reality you ended up with exactly what you needed. Which is; Nico and your daughter and the realization that you love them both more than you hate the man who hurt what you love."

She stared at him with her mouth open. "What the hell did you just do?"

He chuckled and shook his head. "Nothing but show you that logic and philosophy can often out preform psychology and theology." He shrugged. "I hate being a one trick pony, what can I say."

Dani smiled. "That's definitely a tricked out pony Mr. Chaplain."

He ducked his head in a mock bow. "I do a hell of a comedy routine for an encore." He winked and cracked his knuckles. "Now, tell me about your relationship with Nico. He intrigues the hell out of me. How long have the two of you been together?"

Dani laughed, that deep chuckle that meant she wasn't going to answer. "Oh no, I'm not going there."

Greg smiled. "Uh-oh, you're going to avoid the question? That means it's juicy." He used the toe of his Doc Marten to pull open the small fridge against the wall. "You want something to drink? I have water, soda, juice?"

Dani nodded. "Water would be fine." She took the bottle when he handed it to her and wondered why she was still sitting there. She took a sip of the water and then a breath. "Fine, we've worked together for a year now."

Greg raised an eyebrow. "And, you've been together…."

"About two weeks." Dani said evenly.

"Cool." Greg sipped his Pepsi. "And you knew you were in love with him when?"

She scowled at him. "You know this how?"

"You two are all chemistry. Not only that, you radiate that vibe that couples who are deeply connected do." He shrugged. "It's something you don't see all the time, but when you do it's easy to recognize."

"Huh." She fiddled with the cap on her water bottle. She screwed it on and then off. "Deeply connected?"

He nodded. "Yep, I can usually tell."

Dani turned the tables. "You married?"

Greg's eyes sparkled. "I was and then I wasn't. While I was she was the most wonderful thing in my life and I'd do anything to have her back." He stood and reached to the bookshelf. He pulled a picture and handed to Dani.

It was of a pretty brunette and Greg on their wedding day. Both of them were smiling and happy. "What broke you up?" The picture couldn't be more than a few years old.

Greg's smile faded a few degrees. "Her cancer. Carrie died last year." He took the picture back and ran his index finger over her smiling face. "We knew she was going to die, but we both wanted to make the most of what time we had left together." He smiled and but the picture back. "And we did. We did everything together and everything she possibly could. She died happy and she made me happy and I'll never forget her."

"I'm sorry." Dani reached out and took his hand.

He shook his head. "Don't be sorry. She was the best thing to ever be in my life and even if she was only in it for a season, then I am blessed for that season. Do I wish she could have stayed longer? Sure, but I don't make the rules. I don't write the DNA code for disease. If I did, I'd be sure that only ignorant bigots, bullies, rapists, child molesters and people who talk at the theater got the bad stuff like cancer, Alzheimer's and HIV." He laughed and winked again.

Dani giggled. "People who talk at the theater?"

"Shepherd Book…special hell?" At Dani's blank look he shook his head. "Okay never mind that one, the rest are perfectly valid."

"I suppose they are." She took a sip of water and started to ask him something when his pager went off.

"Shit." He pulled phone from his desk. "It's ICU, that's never good and I usually just head up there. I'm gonna have to cut this short, sorry."

Dani smiled. "It's okay, you've actually helped already."

Greg stood and nodded. "If you need me again, you know where I am, you know make a left by the rainbows and lollipops, in the land of Oz." He smiled, waved and hurried out the door.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Juliette stood in the barn and inhaled the scent. She loved riding, horses and even stables. Several houses had stables and when she was little she'd spent hours in them. Her parents liked horses, but neither of them appreciated the care of the horses. Juliette never minded and she'd spent time in the barns with the grooms and farriers and she'd learned. She leaned over the stall with a bit of apple and waited for the mare to step closer. They'd told her she wouldn't that she'd been abused and she wouldn't let anyone touch her, but Juliette knew she would.

So she waited, with the apple in her hand and her body still and the little brown mare eventually got interested enough to move closer and sniff and then her lips searched Juliette's palm and took the slice of apple. She smiled and added another slice and over and over the game was repeated until the nose stayed on her palm and Juliette was able to reach over with her other hand and stroke the velvety nose slowly.

She smiled at the skittish little girl and spoke softly to her. "What's your name baby? Hmm?" She rubbed her nose and then up by her eyes watching the horse's face and all she did was step closer so Juliette could rub behind her ears. She chuckled. "You like that don't you. You remember someone being nice to you once or twice? Maybe a long time ago right?" She rubbed and scratched the brown's ears and the horse snickered and flicked her tail, but it wasn't in agitation, just in acknowledgment.

The barn door slid open and startled them both. It was raining and the wind was loud. Juliette turned and the little brown mare stomped to the other side of her stall with a nervous whinny and a roll of her eyes.

"You scared her." Juliette slid from the bottom rung of the gate and turned to see TK sliding the door closed and water dripping from his head. She smiled. "You're soaked."

"That I am and what are you doing out here? You don't have barn duty?" He glanced around. All the horses had hay, water and oats. There wasn't thing for him to do. "You did my job?"

She shrugged. "I like the horses and I wanted to come out and see them. I figured I might as well feed and water them while I was here." She kicked the straw at her feet. "I already delivered the laundry."

TK gave the hairy eyeball. "That was you? Dropping my clean clothes off like that?" He shook his head. "You better watch out. Beth is about ready to take someone's head off because her red shirt fell off the hanger."

"Whatever, like she doesn't steal my damn socks when she delivers shit."

He wiped his head again and checked his watch. "Well, what are we going to do for forty minutes then?" He flashed a killer smile and stepped closer to the blonde. He hadn't been able to get her out of his head ever since they'd kissed the day before.

She looked up at him. God, he was pretty. His blue shirt was stuck to his chest and shoulders and rain ran down his arms and her eyes watched a drop move over his bicep. "You know there are towels in the tack room, come here." She grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the back of the barn as her heart pounded in her chest.

She slid the door of the tack room open and then found herself pressed inside by TK. His body was a wet, warm wall behind her and she turned to look up at him. "What are you doing?"

He reached behind him and slid the door closed as he smiled down at her. "Looking for a towel?"

"I don't think you need to shut the door to find a towel." She sidestepped and opened a cabinet. There were a few towels and she pulled one from the shelf and handed him one.

"But I figured I might to take off my shirt. You know…" He flashed his smile, "So not to upset the wildlife and all with my physique." He pulled his drenched shirt over his head and tossed it onto the saddle stand in the corner. He used the towel to dry himself while he watched Juliette and then towel followed his shirt. "Maybe I should be worried about the physique upsetting the girl in the room." His eyebrow rose.

Juliette stared at his chest while she bit her lip. Slowly her eyes rose from his chest to his lips. She stepped closer and her breath paused in her throat as her hand came up to rest on his chest.

He lowered his head and his hand found her cheek to slant her head to side as her mouth found hers. His mouth pressed soft and then his lips tugged on her bottom lip before his tongue traced across hers and then slid inside.

Juliette moaned and pressed against him. Her hands slid over his chest to his shoulders and she pulled him closer and then she broke the kiss off. She stepped back panting and looked up at him. "We can't. I can't, not this way, but I want to."

TK looked down at her. "Why the hell not?" He pressed himself against her. He was hard, he was ready and he wanted her.

She shivered. "Please don't. I need to behave, if we get caught…" She shook her head. "They won't let me out on the weekends." She moved to the door and pulled it open. "I'm sorry TK. I want you and I promise it's going to happen, but now is not the time." She ran out of the tack room and then pulled open the door to the barn. She looked back and then ran out into the rain.


	27. Heading Home

_**NOTE: **_ I'm way behind on things, which means this gets put at the end of the list, but it got done. You know the deal. No beta means typos exist...mistakes are my own and I take full responsibility. You can decide what you think about this chapter. Personally, not my favorite. More move it forward...it happens. We are nearing the end, wrapping things up. A few more strings to pull and a pretty bow to make.

* * *

**Heading Home**

Matt was annoyed and a little bit angry. He pushed open the double door and then he was in his office. He threw his coat onto the chair and dropped into his chair. He stared at his desk, drumming his fingers on his arm rest and tapping his foot as he tried to decide what he wanted to do. He lifted the phone from the cradle and dialed Nico's extension. The other man picked up on the third ring and Matt knew it would have went to voicemail after the fourth, so he figured Nico was deciding whether or not to answer.

"Donnally, what can I do for you?"

"Can I see you in my office?"

Nico sighed. "Is this something we can handle over the phone? I'm in the middle of something."

Matt figured that wasn't a lie, but was more Nico trying to avoid him. "No, we can't handle this over the phone."

"Give me ten minutes then."

"Fine." Matt hung up. "Fucking prick…always with the upper hand." He got up and moved to the kitchen area. He poured a cup of coffee and found Hank talking to one of the trainers.

Hank motioned that he wanted to chat so he paused and waited.

"Careles mentioned that you went to check in on Dr. Santino and her daughter." He watched as Matt nodded. "How are they?"

"Okay. I told Dr. Santino that we'd be sure her daughter got all the best therapy we could offer."

"Good, good. That's exactly what we should do." He nodded toward the hall. "I gave the form to Careles and he's going to see Miss Pitman tomorrow and have her sign it."

"He doesn't think there'll be a problem?" He took a sip from his mug as they walked toward his office and the stairs with Hank. Matt watched him smile and shake his head. He seemed pretty self-assured.

"No, no he said she could be stubborn, but Nico's job is persuasion, right?" He nudged Matt's shoulder. "I'm sure it will be fine." He smiled. "Keep me posted. I sent you a couple of emails. I have my feelers out for few new buyers and we might need to do some schmoozing soon."

Matt gave him a smile he didn't feel and nodded. "Okay, I'll look over the emails and keep it in mind." He lifted his mug in parting and as soon as Hank was gone he dropped the fake smile and headed back into his office. He sat back behind his desk and opened his desktop and email.

He was engrossed in his email and his coffee when Nico arrived.

"Donnally?"

He glanced at the doorway and minimized his screen.

"Nico, come in." He pointed at a chair.

Nico raised an eyebrow. "Is this going to be long, because…" he looked at his watch, "I have a meeting with the security team in fifteen minutes and then a lunch meeting."

Matt frowned and stood. "Well, if you come in and sit we could probably get this done pretty quickly."

There was a sigh from the man at the door and then he sat on the couch along the wall. "What can I do for you then? Did you see Danielle?"

"Yes, that's actually what I want to talk to you about." He moved to the door, closed it and then turned to look at Nico. He cocked his head to the side and then stepped around the chair closet to him so he could sit. "I want to make something really clear."

A cold smile spread ear to ear on Nico's face. "What's that Matthew?"

"If you hurt her, you'll regret it."

"Oh?" His lips lifted again. "You're the one who hurt her."

Matt leaned forward and shook his head. "Look Nico, I've heard the rumors about what went on with you and Gabrielle Pittman." He sneered. "How you have quite of a dark streak. I hear it's why Gabrielle never let you touch her again." His eyes met Nico's. "I don't want any of that touching Dani. Do you understand?"

"Oh, I understand." He tried not to laugh. "But, you should clear up your rumors. Maybe clarify with Gabby. Some of information correct." He let one eyebrow rise, but kept the smile off his face. "The rest is completely wrong. I don't kiss and tell." He stood since he wasn't about to let this conversation continue. He looked at Matt. "Gabrielle…well, you'd be an evening of entertainment for her and she'll answer any question you ask about her sexual appetites and since she's pissed as hell at me, I'm sure she'll include me as well." He turned to the door and then paused. He turned to look at the other man. "Fair warning, she will chew you up Donnally. Chew you up and spit you right out." He started laughing.

The assistant GM's face was confused. "You just said…never mind. What are you talking about? I know she's a bitch."

"Word of advice; she's not just out of your league Donnally, she's out of your stratosphere. Talk to her, fine, go ahead and get whatever answers you think you need, but don't let her seduce you."

Nico breezed out the door before Matt could respond.

"Son of a bitch." Matt watched him leave as his hands fisted. "Son of a fucking bitch." He turned to his desk thinking that Nico was a total ass. He had Dani and was now trying to keep him away from Gabrielle Pittman for some reason. "Fuck him." He picked up the phone and hit the button for the operator. When she picked up he politely asked. "Amanda, this is Mr. Donnally can you get Gabrielle Pittman on the phone for me please? Thank you." He hung up and brought his email back up.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Lindsay yawned and stretched. She was tired. Therapy had worn her out and for the first time since she had been in the hospital she was more physically tired than emotionally worn out. She wasn't sure where her mother was, she'd been there for lunch and she'd told her she'd made an appointment for the counselor to talk to her when she was done with her afternoon therapy session. She'd pushed through both hours, but she wasn't sure how. She'd been in a lot of pain the last forty minutes or so of it and she really wanted to stop, but Kara, the main therapist had really helped her.

She yawned again and lowered the head of the bed just a bit as she rolled to her right side, facing the door. She pulled Nico's coat over her shoulders and just as she was about to close her eyes she saw Sarah at her door.

Lindsay sat back up and smiled a bit. "Hey." She tried not to yawn, but she wasn't successful.

Sarah smiled and held up two cups. "I brought afternoon caffeine." The woman entered the room and closed the door behind her.

"Thank god." Lindsay smiled wide.

Sarah nodded and chuckled. "Indirectly you can thank him because Greg's the one who put them in my hand on my way here." She winked. "He said something about owing you some from earlier. He said you'd like the mint mocha latte, with a shot of espresso, extra whipped cream and if you didn't then his Spidey senses were off."

Lindsay giggled and rolled her eyes. "I've never tried the mint, but it sounds good." She held out her hand. She hesitantly took a sip and then nodded. "Oh yea, I like it." She took another sip and her eyes drifted closed. "Mmm, okay that hits the spot." She opened her eyes. "How did he know I'd like it?" She gave the woman an odd look.

Sarah waved her hand and set the other cup down. "Honey, I've worked with Greg for several years. He probably had no idea." She motioned to the other cup. "That one is plain coffee with cream. If you didn't like the mint, that one's for you too. I don't drink that much coffee. He just covers his bases. He knows you like coffee. He figures you like cream. I have sugar and sweetener by the handfuls in my pocket." She smiled and then motioned to the chair. "You mind if I sit?" When Lindsay shook her head, she sat. "Greg's just fun to be around." She smiled and then looked Lindsay in the eye. "How are you doing though Lindsay?"

Lindsay shrugged. "I don't really know." She stared at her lap and fiddled with the sleeve on the coffee cup. "Sometimes good, sometimes really bad."

"That's normal. Is there anything you want to talk about? Something in particular?" Sarah sat back in the chair and opened a note pad. She wrote something down, but other than that just waited.

She glanced at the woman and saw her smile encouragingly and then she took a breath. "Before this and I guess, even now, but like you know…I was a virgin. I mean no real experience with boys." Her eyes filled with tears. "Sure, I kissed a few and yea like there was over the clothes groping and grinding, but nothing else and then god…then this." She wiped her eyes. "I mean I have friends and I'm not a prude about sex, but this is not even sex, it's disgusting, it's…" She swallowed and looked away as she tried to get her emotions under control.

Sarah had read the report, she knew what had happened. She reached out and offered Lindsay her hand, but didn't take Lindsay's. She waited. It was important not to initiate the contact and she knew that. If Lindsay wanted the physical comfort she could take it. Lindsay ignored her hand, so she pulled it back as she spoke.

"You need to know sexual assault and rape, of any kind, is not about sex. It's about power and force. It's about taking something that is yours and making it theirs. Something is stolen. A part of you is torn away. Those feelings of loss control and safety are normal. You were robbed of more than just what they took from you physically and while you can't get that back. You can get the feelings of control and safety back Lindsay. With time and therapy, those you can get back." Sarah watched the struggle on the Lindsay's face. "You need to remember that. It won't be easy. It won't be tomorrow or next week and probably not this year, but you can get it back."

Lindsay nodded and sipped her coffee because she didn't want to talk yet. She wiped her eyes again. She didn't really want to cry, not now, not again. She took another breath and looked over at Sarah. "I see them, or someone everywhere. I close my eyes and see them and out of the corner of my eye, one of them and I'll hear someone and think it's them and god, a scent…" She shivered and her hand fisted in the coat. "I don't want to live this way and how do I go back to school? Will they know and how do I just go and not let them know because it's not like I can be there act like everything is normal." She closed her eyes, pressed them shut hard and kept them that way as she shook her head. "I want normal, but I can't have normal. I want to be sixteen. I want to be a normal sixteen year old girl. What's wrong with that?"

She was crying now and she ended up dragging the thick black wool up under her chin and curling up. She cradled the coffee and let the steam bathe her face. She sniffed. "It's not like I can drag this coat with me. I can't take mom and Nico. People will be there…" She shivered. "Boys that look like them…that smell like them…" she whispered the last.

Sarah jotted a few things down and nodded. "Let's start there Lindsay. Let's make a plan for what you'll say and do at school. A script to go by. You're' right, you can't act like nothing happened, but what you tell people is up to you and we can decide right here what you want people to know." Sarah met Lindsay's eyes. "But there will be a court case and if you decide to testify, and that is up to you, but if you do, there is no way that things will stay super quiet. People will find out and you will have to be brave. You don't have to testify, but it often helps."

Lindsay nodded and bit her lip. She looked out the window for a few seconds, they felt like eternity to her, but she knew they weren't. She looked back at Sarah. "Can you help me come up with something for school? I'll worry about the court thing later."

Sarah smiled and nodded. She turned the page of her note pad and readied her pen. "How much do you want to reveal Lindsay? Because if you want the help of the school, we can arrange that. They know you were taken from the school. It's already been on the news that security was tightened. You just need to decide."

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Dani yawned and stretched. She'd spent the night with Lindsay at the hospital. Ray had stopped by for about thirty minutes with Carla. Dani did not care for the other woman, but she said nothing and smiled. Carla was the reason they'd left so soon. She'd whined almost as soon as they'd stepped into Lindsay's room about how much she hated hospitals and how uncomfortable they made her.

She gave Ray points for snapping at her and telling her that she hadn't needed to come. She was the one who'd insisted. Dani had watched the other woman huff, pout and cross her arms as she glared at Dani and then was saccharinely sweet to Lindsay, telling her how she couldn't wait to have her back over for the weekends so they could hang out again. Lindsay rolled her eyes when Carla wasn't watching and Dani had to turn away to keep from laughing. What Ray saw in this woman…well, never mind her fake tits and ass were probably exactly what he saw.

After her father and Carla left Lindsay spent her time writing in a notebook and occasionally asking Dani a question or her opinion on what she should do about school. Sarah had encouraged Lindsay to come up with a script for when she was asked about her experience. It was a good plan and before bed Dani had role played a nosy teenager with Lindsay to give her the chance to practice. Lindsay was starting to feel more confident. Dani knew she was scared, and she didn't blame her. She told her how proud she was and once Lindsay was asleep she cried for her daughter.

Nico had kept his promise and stopped by. He brought Lindsay two new magazines and he stayed almost two hours. The three of them talked about the team and everyday things and Dani was glad he came and helped keep Lindsay's mind off of everything else. Hell, she was glad he helped keep her mind off everything else. Lindsay dozed off before he left and Dani walked down to the garage with Nico.

She smiled as she remembered him pressing her against his car and kissing her senseless. She rolled her head toward the window and closed her eyes again, replaying it in her head.

"_I've missed you." His breath was hot against her neck as he kissed along her jaw. "God, I need you so much." He pressed against her hip with a little growl. He unlocked the door to the Lincoln and opened the rear door. "Get in."_

_She looked up at him and shivered. "The backseat?" She smiled. "I haven't been in the backseat with a man since high school." She slid across the leather and looked over at him as he followed her in and pulled the door closed._

_He turned and pulled her toward him and then leaned over her so that her back was pressing against the seat as he leaned over her. He smiled down at her. "Then it's about time to relive a memory." His hand slid under her shirt and found her breast as his mouth found her lips and his tongue slipped inside. He moaned and kneaded her breast, rolling her nipple until she made a soft sound in his mouth and lifted her hips against his. He deepened the kiss and let his tongue tease and thrust with hers in a delicate battle._

_Dani moaned and her hands pulled at his shirt, tugging it from his pants to find skin. She writhed against him. She wanted him and now wouldn't be soon enough. She felt like she'd been away from him too long, even though she knew that wasn't true. But not seeing him, hearing him or touching him all day had been torture. She needed him. She'd missed him and even now, she was missing something from him. His hand was teasing gently, almost barely touching her and she moaned in frustration._

_She turned her head to the side breaking his kiss and panted against his neck, "Nico, please." She pushed his shirt up higher and dragged her nails over the sensitive skin of his ribs. _

_He smiled down at her. "What do you want Dani?" _

_She frowned and shook her head. "Not this…" She lifted her hips and pressed against him hard. "Please, I need you."_

_He kissed her again. "We're getting there baby." He pushed her shirt up and let his fingers graze over her side. His fingertips just teased her breasts and then he pulled her bra down and circled her nipples. He lifted his head and watched her face. He lifted an eyebrow and watched her. "Are you complaining about my skills?"_

_She shook her head and bit her lip. She was needy, her nerves were on edge. "Please, I need more." _

_His hands stilled and looked down at her. "Tell me Danielle." _

_She blinked at the sudden change in the tone of his voice and a shiver ran through her. Her nipples tightened immediately and she went hot from head to toe as suddenly wet heat pooled between her legs. "Oh god…" She swallowed. "Yes, more of that, I need you like that."_

_He took both her hands in his left and moved them over her head. He pressed them against the cool leather of the seat. His eyes were on hers. "Keep your hands there, then. Is that understood?" _

_She nodded at him with wide eyes. "Yes." Her voice was breathy and a bit hesitant. She found the door handle and gripped it and then licked her lips. She watched as he lowered his head to her chest. Her breath caught in her throat... _

The knock on the door startled her. She jumped and turned, suddenly flushed she was sure, to face the door. "Yes?"

"It's just Missy, the nurse. I have Lindsay's morning meds and Dr. Cooper and Dr. Nanda are here to see if she's ready to go home."

"Oh, I don't think she's awake yet." Dani stood, trying to get her thoughts back together as she moved to the bed. She touched her daughter's shoulder. "Linds, hey baby. The nurse is here. Wakey, wakey…."

Lindsay opened one eye and glared up at her mother. "I'm up, well sort of." She smiled. "That means it's Friday, right?" She turned to Missy and smiled wider. "Friday right Miss?"

Missy nodded. "You get to leave girlfriend. Well, as long as the Doctor and Doctor say it's okay anyway, but Nanda's telling Cooper you're doing great in therapy so you should be released to do it outpatient as long as your foot looks good to Cooper this morning." She rolled her eyes. "Surgeons, always have to make them happy." She handed Lindsay a small paper cup of pills and then her water pitcher. "Your antibiotics and antivirals." She frowned because of what they were for, prevent the STDs. "You have any pain this morning or doing okay?"

Lindsay moved her foot and winced. "None of the heavy stuff it makes me sleepy. Just the ibuprofen."

The nurse nodded. "I'll bring it when breakfast shows up then." She held up her stethoscope and went about listening to Lindsay's chest and lungs and then looked at her foot. "Good, you'll live until we send you home then." She winked and smiled at Dani. "You hanging in there mom?"

Dani nodded. She liked Missy, she was friendly and Lindsay liked her and she seemed to be good at her job as well.

Missy squeezed Dani's shoulder as she went past. "You want some coffee?"

"No, I'll walk down. I need to stretch I think." Dani smiled at her. "I appreciate it though."

"No problem. The doctors will be in soon."

Dani yawned again and stretched. "You want me to help you to the bathroom?" She asked as she watched Lindsay sit up and ease to the side of the bed.

"No, I think I can do it." She reached for the single crutch that she'd been using the day before.

Dani watched. She had two crutches and Dani wished she'd use both of them, but she was stubborn. She kept insisting she only needed one. She watched as Lindsay moved forward and she'd give her credit. She didn't slip or fall. Okay, maybe she was okay on just one. "Will be okay if I head down for coffee?"

Lindsay nodded. "Yea, I'm cool. Missy always comes with the docs, so I'm fine mom. Go ahead." She pushed the bathroom door closed. "Just tell her you're going. Okay?"

"I will baby." She smiled, pulled a twenty from her purse and headed to the door. "I'm going Linds, I'll be back in ten minutes."

"Kay." Came the muffled reply.

Dani found Missy at the desk. "I'm going for coffee and Lindsay wanted me to let you know that if the doctors show up before I get back, to make sure she's not alone." She was sure to catch Missy's eyes.

Missy nodded. "Heck no." She glanced down the hall. "I've told Cooper that ten times this morning. He should know not to go in without finding me first. Nanda never does anyway if it's a female patient, very improper and all." She looked up the hallway and found the man. "He's busy with another family at the moment, if you hurry you might make it back in time to be annoyed by him." She winked.

Dani smiled. "I'll do my best then." She nodded as she headed to the elevator. Hopefully they'd be out of the hospital by early afternoon.

By the time Dani got back with her coffee, and one for Lindsay, the Doctors were standing outside the room with Lindsay's chart. Dani looked up at Dr. Cooper.

"Excuse me, Dr. Cooper?"

He looked over at her and smiled. "Dr. Santino, yes how are you, we just finished examining Lindsay. Missy said you went to get coffee." He nodded at the cups. "We can go back inside and talk if you'd like?" He didn't really wait on her answer, just motioned to the door and Dr. Nanda pushed it open and the three of them went back inside.

Lindsay looked up from her breakfast with a smile. "Mom, oh good, you found them. They said I can go home." She smiled again and then took a bite of her toast, before holding out a hand for her coffee. "Mocha?"

Dani nodded, handed her the cup and then turned to the doctors. "So, what do I need to know?"

Dr. Nanda looked at Dani and smiled. "She's doing very well with the rehab. I spoke with a," he consulted his chart, "Mr. Matthew Donnally of the New York Hawks and he sent me the name of Dr. Jared Chamberlain." He nodded. "Excellent Sports Medicine specialist, he said he will oversee her therapy and she will have only the best." He nodded again and handed Dani a paper with an appointment date and time on it. "This is when they called to set up the intake for her. You shouldn't need to use our therapists if you are seeing them, but if you do, you can always contact us. Our number is on the bottom of this form." He handed her another form. "This has exercises she should do every day."

He looked at Lindsay. "I've already reviewed this with her, so she knows this." He glanced at his watch. "I need to check on a patient in rehab now, but if you need me, let me know." He waved to Lindsay and then shook Dani's hand. Then he left.

Dr. Cooper moved to the foot of Lindsay's bed and waved Dani to follow. "Lindsay's foot seems to be doing well. " He pulled the sheet back and looked up at Lindsay. "I'm going to show your mother the wound. Okay?"

Lindsay shrugged. "Yea, I suppose." She sighed and then winced as he unwrapped the ACE wrapped holding the gauze.

He peeled the gauze back and showed Dani the wound for the first time. "The cut itself had been jagged and across most of the sole of her foot. It severed a good deal of the tendons, muscles and ligaments that support the foot. Which means it also damaged the nerves of the foot as well." He pointed to some of the incision. "We reconstructed and used donor tendon to replace what we could." He smiled and reapplied the bandage. "It's healing well."

Dani nodded and swallowed. It looked like it should hurt. "Good, so the big question is; when can she leave?"

"Paperwork is being finished and they want her to complete morning therapy. So after lunch would probably be the goal." He looked from Dani to Lindsay. "How does that sound?"

Lindsay nodded. "Wonderful."

Dani smiled. "I agree."

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Nico was distracted. He hated that he was, but he couldn't help it. He didn't want to be in his office and he'd been there two hours too long already if he had anything to say about it. He could do what he was doing from home, or his car, or really anywhere. So, he pushed away from his desk. Picked up his iPad and grabbed his coat.

Dani had texted him earlier. Lindsay was coming home today and he needed to pick Juliette up from rehab anyway. Ray Jay was at school, so he figured he would make sure things were good at Dani's place and pick up some chocolate croissants on the way over. He knew Lindsay liked them. He smiled as he hit the glass doors.

He frowned when he saw a familiar form heading toward him. Then he shook his head in disbelief. The other man had some serious balls. Matt was stupid, but he was definitely ballsy.

He pulled open the glass door and held it. "Gabrielle." He waited for her step through the door and then without hesitation he went through it the other way.

He knew she was waiting to add something snarky to him, but he was gone before she could and he didn't glance back to give her the satisfaction. He heard her say something loudly, but he continued to ignore her as he moved out of the building.

He was only half surprised when his phone rang and it was Gabby's number that came up. He hit ignore and slid into his car. He was out of the lot and on the road when it rang again. This time it was Dani.

He smiled as he accepted through the car's Bluetooth. "Hey."

"Hey yourself, what are you up to?"

He could tell she was smiling. "I just left my office. I was actually heading to your place to see if you needed anything since we haven't been there much. You know, milk, eggs, bread, toilet paper?"

Dani laughed. "Very practical, I know we're stocked up on Charmin. I buy in bulk, but eggs, bread and milk, yes; we need those I'm sure. I can text you a list if you don't mind?"

"I don't mind. I was going there to see what we needed. I just said that." He smiled and shook his head. "A list would be helpful." He made a turn.

"Really you were going to shop for me?" She asked softly.

"For us, yes." He paused and smiled. "I don't like being out of toilet paper and trust me, you haven't been around Juliette when there isn't any milk for her morning coffee." He chuckled. "It is not good to be on the receiving end of that tirade."

"I'm sure. What time are you picking her up by the way?" Dani sighed into the phone.

"Probably when I'm done shopping. When are you going to be home?"

"They said after lunch, so soon hopefully, but you know how hospitals are."

"I do, not that I mind you just calling, but was there a reason you did Danielle?" He was wondering if something was wrong, though she didn't sound upset.

"Oh no, not really anyway I just wanted to know what your plan was. When Juliette was coming home."

There was a small pause before she continued and Nico wondered if was because the way she mentioned Juliette coming home to her house like it had always been. Emotion filled him and then her voice was in his ear again.

"I also missed you and really, I want to know what you want to talk to me about. You brought it up a couple of times, but you seem to be putting it off." She made a disapproving sound. "I don't like you putting it off. It's making me nervous."

He smiled. "You're squinting aren't you?"

"How did you…You aren't here are you?"

He laughed. "No Dani I'm in my car driving toward the grocery store. I just know that little sound you make is usually accompanied by a squint. We'll talk tonight. I promise, as long as the kids behave and we have time to ourselves." He stopped in mid thought as he stopped the car at a light. His face crumbled as he realized what he'd just said, but with all the drama with Ray Jay, Juliette and Lindsay he actually meant it. They'd been dealing with teenagers and young adults for the past two weeks. He wiped a hand over his face and pulled forward as the light changed. "Oh my god, I'm old. I actually sound like a father. When did that happen?"

It was Dani's turn to laugh. "Sorry, you're involved with a woman with kids. It's what happens." She hesitated. Her next words were suddenly serious. "Nico, if you want out. Please, do it now before things get harder."

"Shit Danielle, why would you even think that?" He turned into the parking lot of the store and pulled into the first spot he came to. He shifted into park and sat back. He knew anger had crept into his voice and he didn't bother hiding it. "If you were anywhere within reach I'd consider turning you over my knee. I love you. You know I've met your kids. We've been what I've considered friends for a long time. I didn't jump into this relationship lightly. I don't want out. Fuck. If you do…" He bit out his words as he gripped the steering wheel.

There was quiet on the other end of the phone and then what sounded like quiet sobs. "I didn't…no, god I don't want out. I love you. That is not what I meant." There was more sniffing. "I'm feeling a little insecure. I'm a single mom, with two teenagers. You've been a bachelor with an exciting life all this time. You don't have any strings. You can come and go when you want. It's a different life…You don't have to dive right into it. You sort of have, but you don't have to. I guess I don't know where things are going. This is still new. I know what my heart wants, but reality tells me something else."

He sighed. "We can have what we want Dani. We're adults, we make the rules, we don't have to follow them. If we want to move fast, then we can do it." He paused. "One thing I've learned living on my own is when you see something you want, someone you want…don't walk away from it and don't let them walk away from you, even if you have a good reason." He cleared his throat. "I did it once. It fucked up two people I loved. I'm not about to do it again."

"Nico…I…"

"Shh, and the kids? They're almost grown. They'll be in college soon and then I'll have you to myself, besides I like them." He smiled. "Dani, if I make a commitment to you it means I make a commitment to your kids as well. I get that."

"Are we talking about a commitment here?" He heard her voice waver.

He shook his head. "Later Dani, send me the shopping list and we'll talk later baby. I love you and I promise we'll talk tonight." He sighed. "I don't want to have this discussion over the phone."

"Okay, I'll send a list and tonight. I love you too."

"See you at the house. Tell Lindsay I said hi."

"Okay, bye."

"Bye."

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Dani hung up the phone and wiped her eyes. She wasn't sure what just happened. She stood in the small alcove of the hospital and stared out the window. She had no idea what to make of the conversation. She was confused and reassured at the same time. How did they go from grocery shopping to talking about commitment? It didn't make sense and why was she feeling so insecure?

She hated that she felt like she needed to analyze herself. She leaned into the window and hugged herself. She really just wanted to be home.

"I'd say 'What's up doc?' but it's overplayed in this place."

Dani turned around to see Greg. He was holding two cups of coffee. She wiped her eyes again and gave him a quick smile. "Hi. What brings you up here? We should be leaving soon."

He nodded. "And that would be what brings me here." He held out a cup of coffee. "Interested?"

Dani nodded and took the offered cup. "Thanks." She sipped. "If caffeine were a drug you would be an excellent dealer. Get em hooked." She winked and took another sip.

"That's me, pushing the hard stuff." He nodded toward Lindsay's room. "I brought Lindsay a cup and wanted to tell her goodbye and good luck. Make sure she had a way to get a hold of me if she needed to talk. She in her room?" He lowered his voice. "The sadists done with her?" He glanced down the hall, looking for any of the physical therapists."

She rolled her eyes at him. "Well, I'm pretty sure they aren't torturing her, but yes she's in her room. We're just waiting on the doctor to discharge her now." She waved at him and headed to Lindsay's room.

He followed Dani inside and smiled to see Lindsay dressed in jeans and a t-shirt. Her hair was fixed and she had a little bit of make up on. He whistled. "You clean up nice Santino." He held out the coffee. "This one's caramel vanilla. I figured you might want something different this time around."

Lindsay glanced at her mother and giggled as she took the coffee. "You're going to have me seriously hyped on caffeine. Thanks though, I could use it."

He nodded and flopped into a chair. "Seriously, how are you doing though? You hanging in okay? Sarah was in earlier I know."

"I'm alright." She opened lid on the coffee and sipped in slowly. "I guess we figured out a plan for school. I'm still a little scared to go back." She shrugged. "Hell, I'm terrified to go back." She sniffed and her posture changed as she pulled up around herself again. "I'm just scared of what people will say, think and how I'm going to react. I don't know."

Greg sat with his head cocked to the side for a few long seconds and watched Lindsay's face. He didn't say anything, just stared at her with an odd look on his face. When she glared, he didn't change his expression.

"What the hell is your problem?" She glared at him and rolled her eyes dismissively.

He laughed and sat up to hug her. He kissed her temple. "Nothing is the matter, but you proved my point." He sat back. "When they do what I did, or whisper behind your back. You do what you just did. Give them attitude." He winked at her. "You have it in spades Miss Santino. You survived what those inhumane pieces of shit did to you because you're smart, determined and you're a survivor. If you can do that you can survive whatever gossip high school can dish out. You don't need to worry about it." He glanced to Dani. "You have one kick-ass mother over there, her hero boyfriend, that older brother of yours and really, you don't need them because you have yourself." He looked back at Lindsay and gave her big grin. Remember though, if you need to talk you can call me, text me or email me. I also respond to smoke signal, bat signal, sky writing and the occasional carrier pigeon." He lowered his voice and bent close, "Just remember to be sure that if you use the pigeon you're gonna have to code the message. That way if it's intercepted by anyone before reaching me, we're still good." He chuckled and winked.

Lindsay was giggling by now. "Oh my god you're crazy, you know that right?"

He shook his head. "That would depend on your definition of crazy. I enjoy having fun. It made you smile and you'll remember it when you need to talk. You'll have a vision of pigeons." He winked at Lindsay. "I just need you to remember to keep the faith. People love you and the universe has a plan for you. Yea, I know it sounds so contrived and trite right now, but I really do believe in this shit, so I share it with other people. I'm not going to tell you everything happens for a reason because that's bullshit. No one should have bad things happen to them. The reason that happens is because there are bad people and you were in the wrong place at the wrong time."

He smiled and paused. Then he continued. "I will say that, this bad thing can either help you grow or tear you down. The choice is yours on that. You can use it to learn something that will alter who you will become in the future and make you stronger. Maybe it will help shape your future self somehow. That doesn't mean it had to happen. It just means we can evolve when we have to. But we're humans and we have a choice so you could choose to let the bad things damage you and you can fall apart." He looked toward at his feet and played with his fingers. "The way I see it, it's like storm surge. If you're strong enough, the bank will hold and when the water recedes the land is damaged, but still there. The dunes shift, but the animals and the plants they come back and the dune is even stronger in the next storm. If you aren't strong enough, the entire bank is washed away; gone. Nothing is left except desolation. The animals and plants, they never come back and the bitter water takes over." He looked up at Lindsay. "I think you're strong Lindsay. I know you're shifting, but you have good roots and I'm pretty sure you'll come back and you'll be even stronger next time."

Dani watched from her spot near the door. The man had her daughter's attention. He was gentle and honest. He was open and easy. He was the most un-therapeutic therapist she'd ever met, but then he wasn't being a therapist, was he? He was being a spiritual advisor, but his advice was very similar to her own. She saw Lindsay's reaction to him. She understood that as well. The man was extremely handsome, even with the piercings in his face and the tattoos, of course this was probably one of the things that her daughter would find even more attractive. The man was also at least fifteen years older than her daughter.

Dani's phone chimed. It was a text from Nico. He was still waiting on the list for the groceries.

"Shit." She's actually already started a list, but Greg had side tracked her and she'd never finished it.

Lindsay giggled and looked at her. "What, who is it?"

"I told Nico I'd send him a list of things we needed at home, he said he'd pick up some milk and bread and things. I forgot to send him the list. Do you want anything?" Dani was talking while she copied the list from her notes application and moved it to the text box. She looked up at Lindsay.

"Nico's shopping?" Lindsay giggled. "He knows how to shop?"

Dani gave her daughter a funny look. She hadn't thought about it, but it did seem funny to think about the scary Nico Careles, Hawks "fixer" grocery shopping. "Well, he's hardly starving and he did admit he hates to not have toilet paper, so he must indeed shop." She smiled.

Greg gave them an ornery grin. "You should make him get tampons. True boyfriend test." He held up three fingers. "Scouts honor, only a tried and true boyfriend, or husband will do it."

Dani rolled her eyes and Lindsay giggled. "Um, well…we aren't quite that far into the relationship."

Greg snorted. "What you can fuck him…" He glanced at Lindsay, "Sorry, I assume you know they're sleeping together right?"

Lindsay nodded, blushed and snorted.

"Good, so like I said, you can fuck him but you can't discuss a natural body function around him or ask him to pick up tampons." He shook his head. "Really? If you needed condoms would you tell him to get those?"

Now Dani was beet red. "You are a horrible man." She was laughing and wondering why she was when she should be telling him to leave or fuck off, but he was right.

Lindsay was almost hysterical. "Oh…you're killing…me…" She had to wipe her eyes she was crying so hard.

Dani added a few things to the list, tampons were not one of them, she smiled as she added, "I love you" and then she hit send. She looked at her daughter, who was smiling so brightly and looking so much like the daughter she hadn't seen in over a week, a lump caught in her throat. She wiped her own eyes and moved across the room to where Greg was in the chair. She bent and pulled the man into an awkward hug.

"Thank you." She pressed a kiss to his cheek. "You made her laugh. Really laugh and I wasn't sure that I'd see that for a long time, so thank you." She hugged him tight. "I don't know how you do whatever it is you do, but I'm thankful for it." She stood, moved to the chair by the foot of the bed and pulled one of her cards from her purse. She added their address her cell number to the back. "This is our address and that's my personal cell number. I'll invite you over for dinner one weekend, once things calm down a bit."

Greg smiled. "I'd like that." He glanced at the card. "You don't live too far from me really. We're only about five minutes from each other." He held up the card. "I probably should run. You're gonna be heading out soon anyway." He glanced at his watch. "You're on Cooper's service right?" He watched Dani nod. "Eh, he probably was just at the desk signing discharge orders. He does them after his lunch, which is at one thirty, so he hits here about two and starts on charts. You should be gone by three." He stood and hugged Dani and then turned to Lindsay.

"You take care and remember. You're strong. You beat those shitheads, you can beat whatever anyone says about you at that school." He leaned in and hugged her, then kissed the top of her head. "You got this Lindsay. You're bigger than this, stronger than them and we got your back. Hold on to hope and keep the faith in what was it…the Flying Spaghetti Monster or Cthulhu?" He winked and then headed to the door whistling Stairway to Heaven.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Ray Jay was sitting at the counter reading an article in Sports Illustrated, or at least making a partial effort to while he listened to his music and exchanged texts with a girl from Social Studies. She just transferred in from another school and she was cute. He was feeling a date later tonight, maybe tomorrow. If he was allowed, he wasn't sure what was going on yet. He was engrossed in the music and texting and missed the door, so was shocked when someone nudged his elbow.

"Whoa…what…" He jumped and swung around to find Nico giving him a funny look from behind an armful of grocery bags. He pulled his earbuds from his ears. "Dude, what are you doing here?"

"Dude, I spend the weekends here, remember." He shoved a bag onto the counter. "How about you get your ass to the car and help Juliette unload the rest." Nico motioned toward the door with his head. "There's plenty left." He smiled when Ray Jay nodded.

"Oh yea, sorry." He put his phone on the counter and jogged toward the front door.

Nico watched him take the bags from Juliette and run them back to the kitchen and then the two of them headed back to the car. He shook his head and started unpacking the bags. Dani hadn't really sent him that long of a list, but he'd added to it and then he'd texted Juliette and asked if she'd needed anything and of course, she had.

Ray Jay and Juliette made short work of getting the groceries out of the car and then helped him unpack and put away. Then the two of them decided to watch TV. Nico was suspicious of Juliette, something wasn't right with her, but he had no idea what and he hadn't been able to get her to tell him; yet.

"I'm going to go change before I start on dinner. I'll be back down in a few."

Ray Jay looked up at him. "Cool."

Juliette just nodded and snuggled under the throw she had pulled over her feet. She was partially curled in the corner of the couch. She'd been avoiding talking to him because she knew he'd be able to figure out she was into TK if she started talking to him.

Nico gave her another look. "Juliette, are you alright? You aren't using again somehow are you?"

She turned her head finally and looked at him. "Nico, Corrine told you my tox screens have been clean. I'm off the juice. I'm good. She's even got me off the methadone. She did a rapid taper. I didn't like it, but she did it. I'm just on the clonidine now." She dropped her head to the couch back. "So, I'm a little off, but hey it's okay." She shrugged, everything she told him was true, but that's not why she wasn't talking to him.

He narrowed his eyes. He knew she was lying, but he'd let it go for now anyway. "We'll talk later then."

He grabbed the bag he'd left at the bottom of the stairs and headed up to Dani's room, to their room he guessed. He smiled as he slipped inside and closed the door. He felt worn out. He hadn't been sleeping well. He'd gotten used to having her with him and when she wasn't. He sat on the bed and slipped his shoes off and took off his sport coat before lying back on the pillows. He tucked his hands behind his head and crossed his ankles. He closed his eyes and sighed. He could smell her on the pillows, in the room and it was good. He relaxed and turned his head to inhale her scent deeper. He missed that sweet scent of her so much and that was the last conscious though he had as he snuggled into the pillow.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Lindsay was so excited to get home. She was thrilled when the door open and she saw the stairs and heard the TV. She heard Ray Jay arguing with Juliette over the remote and it almost made her cry. She looked at Dani.

"Mom…" Her lip trembled and she bit it to make it stop. "You don't know how good it feels to be here."

Dani didn't bother wiping her own tears. She shook her head and pulled her daughter to her side. "Oh baby, yes I do because I wasn't sure…oh god…just know I do. I know how good it is to have you home." She kissed her cheek, her hair and then pulled back and did wipe her face. She took a breath and called her son. "Ray Jay, get over here and tell your sister hello."

Ray Jay vaulted over the coffee table. "Linds, holy hell, you're home. You're finally here!" He picked his sister up and spun her around in a big bear hug. "You okay? I mean, you know what I mean." He put her down carefully. "Watch it with those crutches will you? Oh and Juliette's here, she can't wait to see you either." He stepped to the side.

Juliette moved in to hug the other girl and pulled her tight. "I'm so glad to see you." She was crying. "You…oh god, you have no idea how much I've been thinking about you." She held on. "I'm so sorry, so sorry Linds." She pulled back and looked at her. "You look so much better now." She looked down. "What they say about the foot?"

Lindsay and Juliette moved to the couch talking about her foot and the hospital.

Dani looked at Ray Jay and then headed into the kitchen. "Where's Nico?"

Ray Jay followed her to the kitchen and shrugged. "He said he was going to change and went upstairs. That was about forty minutes ago, so don't know. Maybe he took a shower?" He looked at his mom. "You okay?"

Dani nodded and straightened her clothes. "Yea, I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?"

He shrugged. "I don't know you just spend a long time in the hospital. Lots of drama, daughter hurt, son arrested. Shit like that?"

"Watch your mouth Raymond James."

"Yes Ma'am." He smiled and winked at her. "By the way, any chance I can go out tonight or tomorrow night?"

"Where and with who?"

"The who I have nailed down, the where is debatable. She is Maura, the new girl from school. She's in my Social Studies class and I haven't asked her yet, but I think I got this locked."

Dani rolled her eyes. "I'll let you, but home by ten thirty and you have all day if you make it tomorrow." She held up her hand before he started to complain. "Don't start or I'll just say no, which is really what you deserve."

He bit back his complaint and nodded. "Fine." He turned to the counter and checked the single bag left there. He frowned.

She nodded. "When you figure out where, let me know." She started to move toward the stairs.

"Mom, please take these upstairs." He tossed her the bag from the counter.

Dani caught it and looked inside. The bag contained one thing; a box of tampons. It wasn't a brand that she or Lindsay used. "Where'd this come from?"

Ray Jay looked up from peeling a banana. "Nico and Juliette went shopping."

Dani knew that Nico went shopping before he picked up Juliette. The bag was from the grocery store. She smiled, obviously the man had no issues buying tampons for Juliette so there wouldn't be issues buying them for her either. She carried the bag up the stairs with her and opened the door to her room to find the man sleeping on her bed. She smiled.

He looked so peaceful. The worry he carried was completely gone from his face. His mouth was slightly open and he looked so innocent. Like a child. She sat down beside him and brushed the hair from his forehead. He didn't move, so she bent and kissed his forehead. When that didn't wake him, she kissed her way to his lips.

Her tongue teased his slightly open lips and then slipped inside and in two seconds she found herself in an entirely different position. His hand found its way into her hair and his other to her waist and she was rolled and then under him. Her legs were parted with one of his and she could feel the thick, heavy weight of his arousal pressed against her.

He deepened the kiss, using his hand to move her head where he wanted it and moaned into her mouth and then he lifted his head and blinked down at her as he caught his breath. "Mmm, that's a wonderful way to get woken up baby." The hand at her waist skimmed up her side to her breast. He teased the side of it and then rolled her nipple and pulled at it through the material of her shirt and bra. "I don't like not being with you at night." He rocked against her and smiled when she gasped. "Did you miss me?"

She nodded and pulled his head back down to kiss him again. "Yes, so much." She kissed him leisurely while his hands teased her breasts through her clothes and her hands roamed over his shirt, but when she started on his buttons he stopped her.

He pressed her hands against his chest and pulled back. "I'm going to make us dinner." He smiled down at her, slightly breathless and flushed.

She shook her head. "Please, dinner later." She arched against him and the friction made her breath catch. "Oh god, please this now, dinner later…"

He looked at the clock. It was only four thirty. It was early, she was right. "What the hell, dinner can wait." His hands were suddenly under her shirt shoving it up and over her head. "I've been thinking about you under me all day Danielle." His mouth found the skin of her neck and he kissed and bit as he moved lower to her collar bone. His hands moved over her shoulders and then to her bra which he unhooked and slid off in a quick motion. His eyes found hers and he said simply. "I need to be inside you."

"Oh god." It was a simple declaration, but it set her on fire. Her hands shook as they moved to undo his buttons. She shoved his shirt down his shoulders as he worked on his belt. "Please." She wanted him just as much. "Hurry." She undid her own jeans and pushed them down her hips.

"I am baby." He pushed his pants off, but held onto his belt. He pulled back and looked down at her. "In the car earlier, you had me so angry." He held the belt in his right hand and dragged it over Dani's breasts and down over her belly. He watched her shiver and he saw her eyes go wide with fear and desire. He let the end of it trail between her legs and heard her breath catch. He smiled down at her wickedly. "Oh, you are getting to be such a wanton little thing Danielle." He winked at her. "But in the car…oh, I was so angry with you."

Dani felt the tears in her eyes and she nodded. "I didn't mean to make you angry." She watched him play with the belt and wondered what the hell her problem was. It was a piece of leather, but every time it touched her it set fire to her body. She gasped when he dragged it over her belly again and her legs fell wide. "You said you wanted to…Oh god, to spank me." She watched his face through the emotional tears filling her eyes.

He paused and took a breath. "I said I would spank you if you were there with me. Spank you as punishment. You deserved it for thinking I'd leave you." His voice was calm and controlled. "Do you think you deserve a spanking?"

She nodded and looked down. "Yes." Her voice came out soft and low.

He lifted her chin so he could see her eyes. "Do you want the spanking?"

She shivered and bit her lip. She blinked and tried to keep the tears out of her eyes. She answered almost breathless. "God, yes I do."

Nico bit back his moan and nodded. He sat up and on the edge of the bed and then he pulled Dani toward him. "Across my lap, come on hurry up because dammit woman I need to fuck you." He waited.

Dani moved and positioned herself on his lap. She felt him stroke her ass and she took a couple of breaths. She'd been through this before and she knew what to expect.

"You'll need to keep quiet Danielle, the kids are downstairs. Do you understand?"

"Ye…yes." She nodded against his leg. This was the first time they were both naked for this and it added another layer of intimacy to the act.

He smiled and then with the belt doubled he hit her ass hard. He didn't wait and landed three more blows. He was maximizing pain and he knew it. He hit her where it would hurt her, the sensitive crease of her thighs.

Dani bit her tongue hard to keep from yelping. Then she pressed her face into the bed. He was hurting her. There was not much pleasure to what he was doing at all. He landed another four strikes and she fisted her hands. She moaned and wanted it over. "Please…please…please…" She begged softly against the bed.

He smiled as heat rushed through him. He loved the way he felt right then listening to her beg. He knew she was asking him to stop, but he also knew that once he did, she would be so ready for him. She was right now. He finished with two more strikes and then let the belt fall from his hand. His hand then smoothed over the red hot flesh of her ass. "So beautiful Danielle, so sexy."

When his hand slipped between her legs she moaned. She was amazed at how wet she was. "Oh. My. God." She moved against his hand. "Please, yes…now…" She turned her head to look at him, desperate need running through her body. "I…" She swallowed and shook her head as he stroked her because she was on the verge. "Oh god…don't stop." She moved with him and when he did stop she groaned in frustration.

He laughed and picked her up to straddle him. "Now Dani…come here." He held himself while she slid onto him and his held fell back. He moaned and she wrapped her legs around his waist. He grabbed her hips and guided her up and down. "There, yes…" He smiled up at her as her hands settled onto his shoulders. One of his hands slid to her breast and teased as she rode him.

Dani leaned back and used her legs to keep herself seated. She moved over him with abandon. She needed to cum and needed him to fuck her. "Yes…please Nico." Her ass was sore, but she didn't care. It make everything feel harsher, more powerful. It brought everything into focus.

Nico thrust with Dani and he watched her. He smiled at her and then pulled her in to kiss her. He kissed to her ear and he was enjoying watching her. She was so beautiful. He smiled at her. "Touch yourself for me. Make yourself cum." He wanted to see her do it and this was a perfect angle. She'd done it before, but…

Dani didn't hesitate. Her right hand slid to her mouth and then down between them. She teased her clit when they moved together and she watched Nico the entire time. God, it was a heady experience. His eyes were on her hands and their bodies. Her fingers moved to touch where they were joined and then back to her clit. She rubbed and pulled and then let a finger slide inside with his cock and moaned deep in her throat at the stretch. "God…" She went back to rubbing and almost immediately she knew she was going to cum.

He smiled. "Oh, but I don't think so, not yet Danielle." He ordered her to wait.

She looked at him in a panic. "I can't not…"

He reached down and pulled her hand away, slowed his thrusting. "You can and you will. Relax your muscles…breathe out, slow." When she didn't respond. He pinched the side of her breast hard enough to bruise and only let up when she yelped softly. "Then, listen to me. Relax and breathe out, panting breaths if you need to."

Dani looked at him and started to pant and her muscles did start to relax even though he kept moving slowly in and out and rolling her nipple. Even though she wanted to tense around his cock with each thrust, she didn't. "Oh god, oh god…please…" Her eyes were locked on his. "Please, I need to cum. Please, please."

He smiled and then he started to move faster and his hand drifted down between them and then he whispered. "Cum for me baby." He touched her and with two thrusts she exploded.

She gripped his shoulders and her head fell back. "Nico. Yes." She moaned low in her throat and thrust erratically against him as sweat ran down her throat. "Oh god…." Another orgasm rose up and pounded over her. "Oh god…oh god…" She hadn't expected that at all.

Nico gripped her hips and pressed his head against her shoulder as he moved faster and harder against her. "God, Danielle…I love you." He panted against her neck and came." He shivered as he emptied inside her. He stayed there and tried to catch his breath.

Dani purred against his ear. She kissed his neck. "I love you too and I am sorry for earlier." She lifted her head and looked him.

He pulled back and looked at her. "I know." He pulled her head down and kissed her softly. Then he pulled back. "I'm going to shower, then I'm going to make dinner."

She smiled. "I'll help, but if I shower everyone will know what we just did."

He chuckled and shook his head. "I'm pretty sure they know what we're doing up here." He slid her off his lap and stood. "You're welcome to join me if you want." He smiled and then noticed the bag Dani had carried up. "You might want to put Juliette's tampons in the kid's bathroom, or her bedroom. She said she's going to need them this weekend." He said as he moved to the bathroom.

Dani blinked and shook her head. "You bought them for her?" She giggled.

"I texted her and asked if she needed anything. That was on her list, so yes. I've purchased them many times before." He ducked his head out the door. "Are you shocked?"

Dani gathered her clothes and shook her head. "Long story, but I'll tell you that Ray never once bought them even when I asked him to." She moved to the bathroom and hugged him. "You just passed a test."

"I didn't know there was one, but okay. Buying tampons; check." He winked and kissed her. "I'm showering then dinner." His face was suddenly serious. "Then Danielle, we talk."

She looked at him and nodded. "The talk, good okay, I'm afraid of this talk you know."

"Don't be." Then he ducked into the shower leaving Dani to dress and contemplate what they needed to discuss.


	28. Looking Back and Moving On

_**NOTE: **_Okay, so this was much later than it was supposed to be. The reason was that an automatic windows update crashed my system and I pretty much lost all of it. The only reason this chapter got salvaged was Google docs. Yes, when I'm working on things I tend to save them in Google docs, so part of it I'd done that with. BUT I didn't save the most recent HUGE piece I'd worked on in Google docs because I didn't shut down. BUT Windows, ohh fuck you Windows...it just HAD to auto update and shut down and something happened with autosave and it mangled my document. When I opened it, well it wasn't right and it would only open a "previously saved version of the document" Well, that was missing more than HALF of the most recent stuff I'd typed. Google had more than that, but I still had to type over half the chapter again. So basically rewrite the damn thing!

I don't know if this is better or not. I hope so. It's hard to remember what you had, exactly...I liked what I had, ohh, but it's gone! Damn WINDOWS.

Really really no beta this time...

* * *

**Looking Back and Moving On  
**

Nico stood, sliding his wine glass and then Dani's toward him. He looked at her. "Grab the bottle." He glanced down the table to Ray Jay and when the boy looked at him he smiled. "You and Juliette have clean up duty."

Ray Jay started to moan, but surprisingly it was Juliette who stopped him in his tracks. "It won't take us long. Nico's fanatical about keeping it clean when he cooks. Look around, the table's like all there is."

Nico knew she was right, but he knew she was doing this to keep him off her scent. "I know you're up to something Juliette." He shook his head. "Just clean it up and there's ice cream in the freezer for dessert."

That got the kids started on what kind and Nico didn't elaborate. He knew what Juliette liked and he'd asked Dani what her kids would want. He bent to kiss Lindsay on the cheek. "You doing okay?"

She nodded. "I'm just a little tired. Think I'll go stretch out on the couch." She stood a little clumsily and then moved slowly with her crutches into the family room.

Dani watched her go and then stood, waiting on Nico. She wasn't sure what they were doing yet. She held the wine and then picked up her glass. "You want to talk in my office?" She motioned toward it.

He smiled and slid his arm around her. "Sure, that would be perfect." He picked up his glass and nodded to the kids. "We'll be in the office."

Ray Jay snorted.

Juliette elbowed him.

"Nice shot Juliette. Thanks for keeping him in line." Nico smiled at her.

"Well, considering you two already screwed upstairs…" She shot Nico a sly look and she started laughing along with Ray Jay. "You're not so young anymore…stamina and all…" She shrugged. "I'm sure we're in the clear for the rest of the night." She nodded sagely.

Ray Jay almost dropped a glass he was laughing so hard.

Dani hurried into the office.

"Juliette, Ray Jay." He glared, but neither of them stopped giggling, so he gave up. He wasn't embarrassed. He was just upset because Dani was bothered. "Get the kitchen done." He followed Dani into the office and closed, then locked the door. "I'm sorry baby."

He thought she was upset, but when he looked at her she was laughing. She shook her head. "No…really…it's fine…" She held up her hand and then snorted. "You're not …young, you…know…might what? Break a hip?" She rolled her eyes. "Do you need some Viagra?"

He frowned and flopped down on the couch beside her. He set his empty glass down. "Oh hell." He grabbed the bottle of wine and poured some into his glass. He sipped and smiled. He poured some for Dani and then handed her glass to her. "I don't believe I need any blue pills." He sat back and I'm pretty sure if you wanted one, I could put on a repeat performance a little bit later." He winked. "I could definitely teach the younger set a thing or two." He held his glass up toward the kitchen.

Dani almost choked on her wine. She swallowed and shook her head. "Oh no. No, no, no…please don't go teaching my son anything. He gets himself into enough trouble."

Nico snorted. "And how exactly is what I do trouble Dani?" His eyebrow rose and he leaned closer to her, a bit over her and played along her nape. "I believe you enjoy every second of it." His lips brushed along her ear. "Or do you like to get into trouble? Enjoy the chastisement that goes along with it?"

Dani shivered and she almost dropped her wine glass. "Oh you're horrible, you know that?" She turned to look at him, but that didn't help her any because there was a dangerous edge to his gaze that didn't help her. She felt her nipples harden and she was instantly wet between the legs.

"You're wet now, aren't you?" The hand at her nape sank into her hair and he tugged sharply.

Her eyes were glued to his. "Yes." Her voice came out as barely a whisper.

He smiled and then sat back up. He straightened her leaning wine glass as he did so. "Careful, you're going to spill."

She glanced down at her glass as if she suddenly remembered she was actually holding it. "Thanks." She lifted it to her lips and sipped. She looked back at him. "Stop getting me flustered." She giggled nervously. "What's this talk about anyway?" She shifted on the couch and leaned into the corner of the arm and the back and bent one knee so she could face him. She kicked off her heels and tucked her foot under her more comfortably. "I've been worked up about it all day."

Nico smiled, he was already barefoot, but Dani didn't like being short all the time, so she wore her heels around him. He didn't mind. He found it sexy. He sipped his wine and then set the glass down. He took Dani's hand. "You know I love you."

She shook her head. "My god, if you're about to tell me we need to take it slow or…"

"Danielle, I already told you I wasn't leaving you." Frustration was in his voice.

She exhaled in frustration and cocked her head to the side. "I know. I'm sorry I won't interrupt again."

He sighed. "Good. I love you Danielle and I'm not planning on going anywhere." He looked at her, his eyes searched her face and then he took a breath. "By now, I think you know me enough to know that I don't start relationships lightly, and when I do I hope that they will be something long term." He paused and watched as she smiled slowly and nodded. "I know things might not work out, I'm realistic, but I'm not looking for a fling Danielle." He cleared his throat. "I'm looking for a relationship. And because of that, I think it's fair that you know a few things about my past." He met her eyes fully. "Things I haven't wanted to share."

Dani inhaled sharply and the wine glass paused halfway to her mouth. She lowered it back down. "What kind of things?" Her thoughts were buzzing in a million directions. She didn't know which ones were legitimate and which were fantasy.

Nico stretched an arm along the back of the couch and used a finger to just trace a path on Dani's shoulder. He watched his hand and gathered his thoughts. "You know some of it. Hell, Dani you know a lot more than most people, but you need to know one thing; before you, there were only two romantic relationships in my life that ever led me to say, 'I love you'." He paused and then looked up at Dani's face.

"Gabrielle and your ex-wife…" Dani's voice was almost a whisper. "What was her name and what happened?"

He nodded and frowned, his eyes danced away and then back to her face. "God Dani, I can't believe I was ever so young. Any of us really…we were young and so damn stupid…or maybe I was stupid." He sighed heavily and leaned back. He lifted his hand from the back of the couch and rubbed his jaw. "Her name was Mara and honestly, I don't think either one of us even understood what love was, but maybe she did. I hurt her so badly Danielle and she never deserved any of it." He looked at Danielle and then he sipped from his glass. "But, let me take a step back. You need to understand a few things first."

She looked at him, confused and shook her head. "Okay, like what?"

"Like why I ended up where I did and how I met Marshall." He played with his glass and watched the wine roll inside it. He glanced up at the woman he loved now. A woman he loved like he honestly never had loved before. "I told you that when I was young I worked with my grandfather right?"

Dani nodded. "You said he was a groundskeeper I think."

"Yes." Nico smiled wide and finished the wine in his glass before setting it down on the table. "He was a groundskeeper for the city. He worked mostly at the cemeteries though. Doing things like mowing, planting, tending flowerbeds and generally keeping up with the other things that needed done. Occasionally, he would dig a grave or two, but only if they were busy and they asked nicely." He chuckled. "All through high school and even into college, I helped him. After school and on the weekends I was in the dirt, raking, digging, on my knees and learning about planting, mowing, pruning and fertilizing." He stared, a little lost in his thoughts. "Both of my grandparents taught me to respect honest work and I learned it the hard way. I also learned I was good at school. My grades were good enough for a pretty good scholarship to the University of Pittsburgh. I hadn't really decided what to major in, but was probably heading toward law school or business after college."

He paused and Dani realized he'd simply stopped. "So, what do you mean you were probably headed…sounds like you never got there?"

He took a breath. "I didn't." He sat forward and pulled the wine bottle toward him. He poured the half glass that was left in the bottle into his glass and then sat back. He really wasn't sure he wanted it, but it gave his hands something to do. He was struggling to gather his thoughts and not sure exactly where to start.

She smiled at him encouragingly and leaned back in her seat. She took another drink and watched as he fidgeted. "So, something happened that kept you from graduate school. What was it? Did something happen to your grandfather?"

Nico looked up sharply and shook his head. "No, no, not at all, he was healthy as a horse for a long time." He smiled. "My grandmother too, always chasing him around with her wooden spoon, threatening to swat his ass if he tracked more dirt through her kitchen or didn't wash his hands." His eyes sparkled. "She was always threatening me with that damn spoon too, and she'd hit me with it, but that man loved her and he'd move mountains for her. If you saw the tiny yard they had and the way he kept it, you'd think he did. I'd never seen two people love each other the way they did."

Dani was sure she'd never seen him look so transported before. The memories were good, they made him feel safe and loved, but as she watched something clouded his eyes and his brows drew together, the lines returned around his lips and the worry was back on his face. She did realize for the first time that the lines around his eyes were laugh lines. She could see a joyfulness within this serious man. There was more to Nico Careles than she'd ever given him credit for and it made her heart skip a beat.

"You sounded like you were happy with them." She took his hand.

He squeezed her hand. He was happy she was in his life. He was just starting to feel happy again, like he had then, for the first time in such a long time. "I was Dani and you make me remember that happiness. You make me believe it's possible again; that and so much more."

Dani blinked at the sudden emotion she felt pressing in her throat and her eyes. Tears were there and her mouth opened. "Nico…"

He smiled at her. "Don't, I'm not trying to make you cry. I just want to explain. You asked before…" He cleared his throat and then lifted his hand to wipe a tear from her cheek. "I love you and you had to pull my horrible childhood from me. Things got better, but you're a therapist and you know what those things can do to a person…"

She nodded and put her hand over his, cupped it to her cheek. "You amaze me." She kissed his palm. "You're so strong, so solid." She shook her head. "Even now, how you became the man you are…it really is somewhat of a miracle."

"No, not really, I'm a mess and I've made a mess of my life. God Dani, look at everything…you know what I did with Gabby and Marshall." He shook his head with a look of despair on his face. "I almost destroyed all three of us."

"No, the three of you did that. It wasn't just you. You didn't choose what happened. There were choices made by three very selfish people with emotional problems. None of you were healthy." She gripped his hand on her lap. "You can't take the blame for that by yourself. Marshall was an addict with a serious psychiatric diagnosis, you yourself were suffering from post-traumatic stress, Gabrielle, well she knows she has her own issues and you struggled between the three of you to find some sort of peace. I'm not saying any of you were right, but none of you are fully to blame. So, I won't let you take the brunt of that. I know your childhood influences you to do that, but stop. You are not responsible for all the bad things."

He nodded. "I know it in my head, but it doesn't always ring true." He smiled. "That's not this story though, you already know that one…or at least that part of it. Let me go back, like I said." He sat back again, taking his hand from Danielle's as he took a sip from the glass in his other hand. He crossed his legs and sighed, resting his hand on his knee. He rolled the wine in the bottom of the glass to distract himself again. He watched it cast patterns on the couch.

He took a breath and started. "It was the summer before my senior year at Pitt and I had a pretty steady girlfriend. She wasn't anyone I really should have been dating and my grandparents didn't approve. I knew I had had no business being with her, but for some reason I kept seeing her. She was younger, not in college at all, and from the old neighborhood. She was the younger sister of someone I'd known and I had bumped into her at an on campus party early in the spring. She should have never been at that party since she was only eighteen." He gave Dani a look and shook his head. "I remember seeing her there and thinking, hell knowing she was in over her head and I just felt like I had to protect her. Like if I did, it would somehow payback the bad I'd done in that neighborhood." He shrugged. "Like helping someone from my old life, would in some small way atone for some of the bad I'd done." He looked at Dani, hoping she'd understand. "So, I dragged her out of the place and gave her a lecture." He shook his head and laughed sadly. "Hell, I was pretty drunk, but not drunk enough to know she was going to end up somewhere she didn't want to be. I got her a cab, but she begged me not to send her home because she was trashed and she convinced me that her parents would kill her. So, I took her to a café and stayed with her all night. We drank coffee and talked about the old neighborhood. We laughed at the people knew and she caught me up on the gossip about who was in jail, who dead, pregnant, married, divorced and cheating on who..." He smiled and shifted. He finished his wine and then sighed.

"Sometime early in the morning, when we were both sober and after too much coffee and a few pastries, I gave her cab fare and then went home in the morning. I didn't figure I'd see her again, but she tracked me down and called me at my grandparent's house and by the end of the month we seeing each other pretty exclusively."

Dani interrupted. "So, you lived at home while you were in college?"

"Yes, my scholarship was great, but I needed the extra for books and fees, and the main campus was a few bus stops or a bike ride from my grandparents place." He shrugged. "It wouldn't have completely covered room and board anyway." He finally moved and put his glass down and then turned to face Dani a bit more, curling a knee under him. He rested an elbow on the back of the couch and leaned his temple against his fingers. "Her name was Elizabeth, everyone called her Liz. She was a pretty girl and fun and she reminded me of all the things that weren't college and responsibility. I think that's why I liked her. I was starting to get a little scared about my future moving on."

"That makes sense and it's a normal response to things."

He smiled. "I could have used a good therapist back then." He scratched at the stubble along his jaw with a sigh and then added a bit suggestively, "Now I do use the good therapist." He winked and watched Dani blush as he chuckled. "Anyway, in July Lizzy told me she's pregnant. I wasn't happy, but I was going to do the right thing and marry her. I was just trying to figure out how to tell my grandparents and when to do it. I mean, I still had the scholarship. I hadn't lost that. I figured could work, support the baby and finish school. I had no idea where we were going to live, but I I guessed my grandparents might let us stay with them."

He paused and smiled and shook his head. "I didn't love Lizzy, I knew that, but…I figured that's what a man did. But things didn't work out that way anyway. Toward the end of July Lizzy came to me all bruised up and crying. She told me that her ex-boyfriend had beaten up on her after she refused to go back to him." He shook his head. "We'd been arguing a lot by then. I should have seen things more clearly, but I was stupid and really young at that point. I went ballistic, even though I didn't love her. You don't go beating up on the woman carrying my child. You don't beat up on any woman. You don't hit a pregnant woman." He turned red with anger. "I found him. He was only eighteen and I put the kid in the hospital. I hurt him pretty bad and I did it with witnesses." He laughed acidly. "Liz stood there and watched, she loved the entire thing. Had it planned out I'm sure. It didn't take the police long to come find me."

Dani gasped and sat up. "Oh god Nico what happened?"

"Well, I was facing a pretty good jail term. I mean Liz was actually going to testify against me."

"Why would she do that?"

He shook his head. "What I didn't know at the time was that the baby wasn't mine. It was her ex's, but he was abusive. She didn't love me, she wanted him, but wanted me to keep her safe." He sighed and dropped his arm along the couch. "I still don't completely understand it. She'd been sleeping with him and me, but she didn't want me, not really. She loved him even though he beat her."

"Women in abusive relationships rarely make good choices, but when did you find out the baby wasn't yours?"

"Not until the baby was born. I was still going to jail and if it weren't for my grandfather and a navy friend on the bench, I would have. The prosecutor was willing to accept a deal based on the fact that I had no prior record, my juvenile records were sealed, but the guy I beat up, even at eighteen, he already had a record for assault, battery, armed robbery and a few other things. I explained the circumstances and the judge agreed that if I joined the Navy and agreed to attempt SEAL training that the charges would be completely dropped." He gave Dani a half smile and a shrug. "What choice did I have? Besides, the Navy had made my grandfather the man he was. It couldn't be that bad."

"Okay, so you were forced into the Navy…"

"No, I had a choice and I never felt as if I was forced." His eyebrows drew together. "I was handed a lifeline, a way out of a bad decision I had made. I would have spent two years in prison and had that over my head and what? Ended up back in the same neighborhood, doing the same things my grandparents tried to save me from?" He shook his head. "I never once thought about it that way. The Navy saved my life, sure it pushed me down a different path, but where would I be without it?" He leaned toward her and ran a hand up her thigh and took her hand. "I wouldn't have met Marshall. I would never have had the job with the Hawks." He smiled ruefully. "I wouldn't have been at that bar to see you with Donnally and then ran a background check on you and I sure as hell would have never been on your front porch when my best friend died. All of that means, I would never have ended up falling in love with you. And for that one thing, I wouldn't change a single second of it Danielle. Not a single damn second."

A sob caught in her throat and she shook her head. "God…" a tear ran down her cheek. "You need to stop making me cry."

He smiled and leaned in to kiss her. He let his lips linger on hers softly and then he pulled back. He wiped her cheek and then pulled a handkerchief from his pocket. He handed it to her with a wink. "Then stop making it so easy." He waited for her to wipe her face and then he continued. "So, the charges were dropped, which didn't make Liz happy. I'm pretty sure she wanted me gone so I wouldn't find out the baby wasn't mine." He could tell Dani was confused, so he smiled. "Her ex was black and she knew that if that baby came out favoring the other guy, I'd know she'd lied to me. It wasn't going to take a DNA test to prove paternity." He sighed. "The thing is if she would have just told me the truth, I wouldn't have hated her. I would have stayed and waited. If he was mine, I still would have done right by her. She really wanted me to be the father. She knew I'd be better father material. I don't know what her issue was."

"She probably didn't know either, but were you disappointed? I mean upset that you weren't the father?" Dani always wondered if he wanted a child of his own. "Were you ever upset you didn't have a child of your own?"

His eyes suddenly shot to hers and he was sure there was pain on his face. "Not then." He shook his head. "I wasn't ready for a baby then. I was too young and I knew it." He drifted back into his thoughts for a few seconds.

Dani had caught the flash of pain on his face. "But at some point you were, or you are." She hesitated, she didn't want to ask since it's what caused the problems with her and Matt, but she needed to know. "Nico, you don't want a baby now do you?"

He shook his head and smiled. He knew why she was asking. "Hell no. I feel like I'm too old to start on diapers and bottles Dani and I would never ask you to do that." He chuckled. "Besides, I have an entire team of grown up babies to get up with in the middle of the night. I don't need another one." He winked at her. "I felt like I helped raise Juliette, granted I did a shitty job, but I feel partly responsible for her and now I do feel like she's mine and I think Marshall would want that." His heart swelled with love for the girl. It always had, but there was more to it now. She leaned on him even more and he knew it.

Dani watched him for a few seconds and then took a breath. She knew there was more he wanted to say. "Okay, so you joined the Navy and then what?"

"Well, I did well. I was physically fit and I excelled in basic training and was recommended for SEAL training based on my scores. I met Marshall. He was an officer in BUDs, which is the SEAL training, but really you're all on equal footing in BUDs, you all suck." He laughed. "He'd actually tried once before and injured his knee, so this was his second try. He was cocky and arrogant and I liked him right from the start. We got along very well because we played to each other's strengths. We were good on the same team, but we could both lead. He could take point and so could I. It was rare when two good leaders didn't let ego get in the way." He smiled. "We managed to encourage each other by pushing each other's buttons and he'd piss me off, make me angry enough so I'd get past something I was struggling with and then I'd do the same. It made the hell tolerable, even when I wanted to ring out and walk away. He wouldn't let me do it. He threatened to shoot me, cut my balls off and a few things that might have actually been worse." He laughed. "I think he was actually deranged enough a few times to do 'em."

Dani nodded. "I know he probably was."

"Well, back then he wasn't quite as loose a cannon, but still…" He shifted. "We made it through and we basically became inseparable, like brothers. Between assignments he introduced me to his world Danielle and it was a world I'd never known." He waved his hand around her house. "This world, god, the world I live in now, but even more…Marshall and Gabrielle's world is so much more than reality and I ended up neck deep in it. Gabrielle, Dani I was head over heels for her, you have no idea, but so was Marshall and you know what happened…I felt guilty about everything and then I pushed her to him."

"Yes, you told me and…" She shivered. "So did Gabrielle, and I can't say I liked hearing any of it, honestly."

"I'm not proud of everything I did…we did, but things were different and you know that it was consensual. I'm not saying it makes it right, but it wasn't hidden. There were no secrets at that time. I wasn't sleeping with Gabrielle behind his back…not at first, not then." He took a long breath. "There came a point when that stopped though. Gabrielle had enough, Marshall had enough and I was sick of being yanked around by both of them and it all stopped. It went back to them as a couple and me as Marshall's best friend." He took a breath and shook his head. "I watched as they played house. I was at all the parties. I was invited to every event. I didn't miss one. I think they rubbed their feigned happiness in my face on purpose. And you need to know that when we had been together that there was rough play between us. After the service, well Marshall he pretty much introduced me to things in the Navy and I found out I had a knack for it. I enjoyed it, it soothed me. Let me release the demons I kept hidden inside. The pain that floated and cruised just under the surface, it would disappear when I played with someone who enjoyed the pain I gave them." He shook his head. "I can't explain it eloquently Dani. If I asked you to explain the way you feel when I hurt you and you float away and why you get so turned on from the pain that you never thought could possibly turn you on…I'm sure you'd struggle to explain it well to me?"

She licked her, suddenly very dry, lips and nodded. "I try to explain it to myself all the time. I understand the psychology, but after all these years of being what's considered normal, how I can suddenly find masochistic sex hot is confusing to me. So yes, I'd struggle to explain it." She shivered. "You turn me on, so it turns me on. That might be it?"

He smiled knowingly. He'd bet money that wasn't it, and he'd love to show her the truth, but he wasn't going to share her with anyone. The only person on earth he might have considered doing that with was dead, but if was honest with himself there was no way on earth he'd ever let Marshall Pittman touch Danielle. He cocked his head to the side, "Maybe, but it could just be that since you're older you've learned to trust your body and your lover more. You're more confident and willing to accept pleasure, no matter what package in comes in?" His eyebrow rose in challenge, but he didn't wait for her to answer. "It doesn't matter. I win." He winked. "I stayed alone and didn't date anyone for quite a few months after we decided to stop our, whatever it was the three of us had going on; the cheating, the hating and hurting each other. And then finally, Gabrielle introduced me to someone, to Mara, and Danielle she was lovely…she is lovely, though I haven't seen her in almost seven years."

"Your ex…"

He nodded. "Yes. We hit it off immediately. She was perfect for me. She was smart, beautiful, intelligent, funny and while she wasn't in the same circles as Marshall and Gabby, she knew similar people. Her father was a senator and her mother was a lawyer. Marshall had met her a few years before. She apparently had no idea about the things he was into. However, Gabby seemed to think she'd be open minded. I didn't care, I figured I could live without kink for the rest of my life if I needed to."

"Oh no…what happened?" Dani shifted in her seat and leaned forward. She set her glass down and then pulled her knees up, tucked them both under her and listened. He'd never talked so openly before, she was completely intrigued.

"After a year, we were married. My grandparents were thrilled. My grandfather died five months later. He was happy though. He told me I'd made him proud. I had served. I had been honored with several medals. I was still active duty. Now, I was married. We buried him in his Navy uniform, wearing mine. Marshall and I carried the casket as part of his honor guard. It made my grandmother cry, but I don't think I'd ever seen her prouder either."

She took his hand and put a hand to her heart. "I know he was proud of you Nico. I know he was."

He nodded and smiled. "Mara and my grandmother got along very well. They shopped and my grandmother helped Mara plant a rose bush." He smiled and shook his head. "That was funny because Mara had never once got her hands dirty before, I swear." He sighed. "We were married two years when my grandmother had a stroke. She didn't answer her phone one day, I went to see what was wrong and found her." He frowned with a far away look on his face. "I knew she wouldn't want to linger on life support, so I chose to turn it off. We buried her three days later beside her husband." He paused. He needed to calm himself. He didn't like talking about losing them.

"I didn't do well then Dani. I struggled." He looked up at her and shook his head. "Mara had never seen me struggle like that and she was worried. I went to Marshall and told him that I was desperate that I needed that release. It had been three years. I'd pushed the need back for three years. I'd gotten by with what little I could, and I'm talking little. I mean Mara wasn't virginal, she wasn't prudish, and a little rough grabbing, some hair tugging and maybe a slap on her ass here or there and I'd blame on too much wine or whatever…she'd laugh it off, but I could tell she wasn't comfortable with it."

"Oh no…so what happened. Did you cheat on her?" She swallowed the bitter taste in her throat.

He shook his head. "No, god, I'd never do that. I took vows Dani. I promised her. I don't lie and I didn't lie then." He wiped a hand over his face. "I asked Marshall what I should do. Of course his first advice was to hire someone, just to hurt, to get the pain out of my system. I considered it, but it felt like cheating. Other than that he told me to be honest and tell Mara what I needed, ask for what I wanted and see what happened." He groaned. "If that didn't work, do what I normally did and keep it light."

"What did you do?"

"Shit, I was terrified and when I did tell her I got the response I was expecting. Some type of horror. She looked at me different…like I was a pervert, but she told me she loved me and she had tears in her eyes and told me she was sorry about my grandmother and she wanted to help make me feel better. She didn't want to lose me." He stood and paced the room. "God, I shouldn't have done it though." He turned and stared at Danielle, shoved a hand through his hair and shook his head. "I wasn't very rough, I gave her a safeword and I spanked her with my bare hand that night." He shivered and got pale. He felt sick to his stomach. "She used her safeword on the fourth strike and we both cried. I held her and told her how sorry I was and that I'd never, ever ask her for anything like that again. She told me it was okay, she still loved me and then we made love. Eventually, we fell asleep. She woke me up sometime before dawn in a panic." He moved back to the couch and sank down beside Danielle.

"Dani, god if I would have known...there's no way I would have ever asked her…" He shook his head. "If she would have told me…why didn't she tell me? Why?" There were tears on his face as he looked at Dani.

She shook her head. She knew. "Oh god Nico, no." She touched his jaw. "You didn't do it." She shook her head. "Nothing you did would have caused that."

"You don't know that. We don't know that." He pressed Dani's hand to his cheek. "Okay, medically I know that there was no force exerted to cause her to miscarry and the doctor said that sex wouldn't have caused it. He reassured us that after a few months we could try again, but nothing I could say would convince Mara that it wasn't my fault. In her mind, I'd beat her and she'd lost the baby." He shook his head. "And maybe she's right?" He shrugged. "Maybe putting her over my knee, put pressure in the right place? Maybe there was enough emotional distress to cause it? Maybe? Maybe? Maybe, but it doesn't matter because she believed it and instead of helping her. I got angry at her. I didn't let her heal. I knew she was hurting because she lost the baby. I knew it. I remember telling Marshall that. I said to him something like, 'She's just blaming me because she's hurt. She doesn't mean it.' He said I was probably right and I should get her some help, gave me the name of a good counselor. I ripped it up. I let her blame me. I was okay with it. I let her blame me and got angry about it. I was hurt that she refused me. I was still hurting about my grandmother and damn it, I lost the baby too. She'd been more than two months along and she'd not even told me yet. She was going to, but with my grandmother she'd been waiting." He paused again, a bit out of breath. "I felt kicked in the gut, hollowed out. I felt like I'd just lost something I'd never even known I'd had."

"Did you ever patch things up?" He was gripping her hand and she realized that he was tracing a character into her palm. He did it when he was nervous, or when he was trying to calm her.

He shook his head slowly. "Eventually, she came out of her grief, but it was only long enough to call a divorce lawyer. She had me served and I had no problem signing the papers. She didn't want anything from me other than to keep the jewelry I'd bought her. I only asked for my grandmother's jewelry back, which she agreed to. She wasn't a horrible person and think she did love me and she knew my grandparents meant more to me than anything. I replaced everything with more expensive pieces voluntarily. I let her keep the apartment and the car. I let her keep the cat too. I was just too young to love her to way she needed loved."

Dani shook her head. "No, you just couldn't give up something that's a part of you." She gripped his hand. "You have the right to be loved the way you need to be loved too, you know? Look at me, Nico Careles. If I asked you to stop breathing could you do it?"

He looked up at her with a smile and shook his head. "Not if I wanted to keep living."

"And wouldn't asking a normal man to enter a marriage or long term relationship without sex be like asking him to stop breathing?"

He smiled and nodded, "Pretty much, I mean he could do it, but he wouldn't because he may as well stop breathing."

She snorted, because that was pretty much her point. "So, asking you to enter a relationship without the domination and sadism you need is pretty much asking you to stop breathing as well, right?"

He paused. "I know what you're saying Dani. I realize that now. But then," He shook his head, "I wasn't ready to admit that I needed it in my life as much as I need the sex. I didn't realize that it was part of who I was."

She gave him a hard look. "You told me that first night that you were infinitely flexible when it came to sex, but you never once mentioned your flexibility when it came to relationships…" She shrugged and dropped her eyes as she paused because she'd just brought something up about their relationship they hadn't really talked about.

He tugged on her hand. "And so the conversation turns to us Danielle. Look at me baby." He waited until she looked up at him. "So, I didn't bring all this up just to explain my past. I mean, you needed to hear it so you understood it, but there was a reason." He took a breath. "You just touched on something Danielle."

She squinted at him. "You call me Danielle when you get all, bossy with me."

His eyebrow rose. "The vernacular term would be 'dommy', but bossy works, and I don't like the squinting_ Danielle_." He added an extra tone to her name. "So, you might want to tone down the attitude."

She felt herself get hot and she sat up a little straighter and the wondered why she was doing it. "Um, okay, what exactly are you doing to me?"

He chuckled and leaned in. "Bringing out your natural submissive side…" He brushed her hair over her shoulder and ran his two fingers from collarbone to collarbone. "You know I want a relationship that involves more than just kinky sex." His gaze smoldered as he looked at her eyes. "I want you and you do enjoy our sex Danielle, we both know that."

She nodded. "God yes…what more is there?"

He laughed as she leaned toward him. "Okay, come one pay attention." He snapped his fingers in front of her face.

Her head snapped back a bit and she giggled nervous. "Okay, stop seducing me then…" She shook her head. "So, you want what?"

"I told you I wanted you in a collar. What do you think about that?"

She gasped. She'd looked into that a little. I mean she had an idea of what it meant before then, but she'd done a bit more reading. "Um…explain what you mean. I have an idea, but there's a broad range of meanings."

His hand slid to her throat and teased over the hollow there. He closed his eyes and imagined what he wanted there. He opened them and found her eyes. "Dani, it means you belong to me. You're mine and no one else's." He paused and waited. He knew what he wanted, but he had no idea how far Dani was willing to take their relationship. He traced a line back and forth around her neck. "It means you give me the right to do as I please, when I please whenever the collar is around your neck. You trust me to keep your body and mind safe within the boundaries we establish. Of course, you still have your safeword. That's part of the boundaries. You agree to learn certain rules and protocols and use them anytime you're wearing the collar." He thought about teaching Dani protocols and positions about punishments and rewarding her. He smiled and wondered what she was thinking about and how their future was going to play out. "That's a place to start. There could be more, but for now that's what I'd like."

"So it's what, symbolic?" She was confused but intrigued.

"No, it's a physical collar, but the meaning is symbolic. Anytime we play, I'd physically put a collar, a special collar I chose just for you that I'd slip around your neck and from the moment I'd secure it, you would address me as Sir and follow the protocols. Some people use Master, but that's not something I'm into."

Dani giggled and shook her head. "Thank god, I read that and I was so not going to be calling you Master Nico."

He smiled. "Good, we're on the same page." His heart was pounding. Did she just basically agree to wear his collar? He wasn't about to jump to conclusions. He took a breath. "Sir is fine as a title of respect." He took her hand. "Do you have any questions?"

"I want to be with you." She slid closer to him. "I know this is part of who you are Nico." She pressed close and looked up at him. "I love you so much and I've learned so much about myself and you told me you wanted my pain, my submission and my tears." She licked her lips. "God, that makes me hot by the way." She glanced down and then suddenly back up. "You said you needed that from me like you'd never needed it before and you were fighting the need to see me in a collar. Well, I'm not about to make you fight that anymore." She shook her head. "I can't do that to you. I want to be with you like that as much as you want me like that."

He slid his arm behind her and pulled her into his arms. He cradled her against his chest and looked down at her. "Does that mean you accept Danielle?" He brushed her hair off her face, down her back and tucked it behind her ears.

She smiled up at him and her voice was just a whisper. "Yes."

He pressed his lips to hers slowly and pulled him to her. He ignored her tongue initially and kept the kiss light. Just a brush of his lips against hers, waiting until the need to deepen the kiss forced him to the point of no return. Then finally, when he couldn't ignore her as she nipped at his lips, he opened his mouth with a soft moan and slid his tongue against the seam of her lips and against her tongue and slowly deepened the kiss.

Dani moaned and reveled in the deepened kiss. Her tongue finally able to find his, but he was only letting her play along with slow, lazy strokes. Her heart pounded as her blood heated. She gripped his shoulders and pulled him closer. She pressed her aching breasts into his chest. Her nipples were rock hard points against the soft t-shirt he'd pulled on after his shower. When his hand tangled in her hair and angled her mouth she moaned her frustration at him and pulled back. She looked at him, panting. She shook her head, her eyes glazed. "Please…Nico, what are you doing?"

He smiled innocently at her. What was he doing? He found that question a bit funny. "Nothing, I was just kissing you Danielle." He looked down at her, brushed a stray lock of hair from her forehead. "God baby, I could take you right now." He watched her flush and let his hand wander down her chest to tease her breast. He growled. "Mmm, this couch…good memories on this couch." His eyebrow rose. "Mr. Grey has nothing on me. I think we came to that conclusion on this couch."

She giggled. "I'm pretty damn sure he doesn't, but I wouldn't really know." She reached for him and tried to pull him down, but he wouldn't follow her lead. She frowned. "I never did read that book remember?" She pulled again, but he didn't budge. She pouted up at him.

He made a disapproving sound in his throat and shook his head, as he continued to tease her breast. He moved his hand up under her shirt and rolled her nipple through the satin of her bra. "It doesn't work that way baby." He winked. "You get what I want to give you and you give me what I want."

She arched into his palm and gasped. "Mmm, so what is it that you want then?" Her voice had gained a husky quality and her focus was a bit off as she stared up at him.

He pressed his mouth to her ear and bit. He lifted his head and smiled when she gasped. He released her ear and sat back enough to see her. His hand slid from under her shirt and he sat back up. "Right now Dani, I just wanted to know that you wanted what I want." He nodded. "I needed to know you wanted to wear my collar." His eyes drifted shut and then he opened them and looked her in the eyes. "That makes me happy. You make me so happy. I needed to know you were willing to kneel for me, look up at me, bow your head to me and say, 'Yes Sir' and you told me you are." He smiled and hugged her before pressing a kiss to her forehead. "I haven't been this happy in a long time. "

Dani hugged him back and just savored being in his arms. She loved the feel of it. She loved hearing his heart against her ear and smelling the scent of him. His warm arms around her and the way he always stroked her back and neck with his fingers. "I love you so much."

"I love you too." He pulled back and smiled. "How about we get some ice cream?" He stood and held out his hand to her.

She smiled and nodded and took his hand. She didn't think much about what she did next, because she did it on pure impulse. She wanted to please him, to see him happy, but mostly she did it because something about it made her heart pound. She watched his face as she slid to her knees and then she dropped her gaze to the floor. She kept her back straight on pure instinct and when Nico released her hand with a short gasp she rested her palms on her thighs. "Yes, Sir."

Nico's breath caught in his throat as he watched her fall to her knees for him. No, it wasn't a perfect kneeling posture, after all, no one had shown her one, but she'd found something instinctively close. Her eyes were down, her back was straight. He felt his heart speed up. He knew she was doing it for him. He smiled and and chose to play along.

He nudged her legs apart with one of his bare feet. "Open your legs wider, always." When she didn't spread her legs wide enough he gripped her hair and tilted her head upward so she could see his face. Then he pushed at her left knee harder, forcing it wide and added more of an order to his next sentence. He bent over her. "When I say wider Danielle, I mean wider. Is that understood?"

She nodded, winced when her hair pulled in his fist and whimpered, "Yes Sir."

"Good." He released her hair and moved behind her where he pulled her shoulders back a bit roughly. "Shoulders back." He adjusted her head with a hand on each side of it by her ears. "Head up, like that, but keep your eyes down unless I tell you otherwise." He finished his walk around. "Hands on your thighs, but palms up." He waited for her to fix her hand placement and watched as she relaxed her back.

He reached out and tapped her shoulder. "I said, keep your back straight." He smiled when she pushed her shoulders back.

He grunted and then smiled. "Good girl Danielle. Now, I can only imagine how beautiful you'll look naked just like that with a collar around your neck, because right now you look sexy as hell."

Dani felt herself go red. "Thank you."

"Thank you, what?" Really, she wasn't in a collar, but she'd started this game.

"Sir." She looked up at him from under her lashes and smiled.

He laughed and held out his hand. "Come on Dani, let's get some ice cream and check on Lindsay." When Dani took his hand he helped her to her feet. "I'm in the mood for some chocolate peanut butter cup and unless the kids ate it all, there is some because I bought it."

She leaned against him, somewhat bashful. "That's one of my favorites." She pressed her face to his chest. "I'll make some coffee and can I ask you a question before we go out there?"

He paused before they got to the door. He nodded. "Of course." He looked down at her seriously.

"When do I get my collar?" She smiled at him. "I'm curious and nervous, and you know how I am."

He laughed and kissed her hard and swift, leaving her breathless and startled. "Soon enough, Danielle, soon enough." He winked at her and opened the office door. "Come on, before they eat all the good stuff and the only thing left is that butterscotch stuff."


	29. Everybody's Talking

_**NOTE: **_Well, here you go and the usual warnings apply. Nothing scary you will find...maybe something to make you snort, but who knows?

* * *

**Everybody's Talking**

There was a buzz and Matt hit the intercom button. "Yes?"

Monica's voice rushed at him. "I'm sorry Mr. Donnally, but Mrs. Pittman is on her…"

Gabrielle shoved his office door open with a smile plastered on her face. "He's got it sweetie, I told you I'd announce myself." She frowned. "Good help is hard to find these days."

"I'm really sorry Mr. Donnally; I wasn't sure what to do." The voice sounded a bit panicked from the intercom.

Matt sighed and glared at Gabrielle. "It's okay Monica, we'll be fine. Hold all my calls please." He released the button and sat back in his seat. He held out a hand toward Gabrielle, he'd dealt with her enough to know he couldn't give her too much leeway. "Please, sit and can I get you anything to drink?" He waited a beat and then stood.

She smiled at him and slid her coat off. She waited for him to take it and then she sat on the couch along the wall. "Scotch if you have it, vodka if you don't." She crossed her ankles and leaned into the couch as she watched him move through his office, first hanging her coat by the door and then to the small bar area he kept. She licked her lips. She wasn't going to deny that the man was pleasing to look at. Right now, without his jacket, his shirt was pulled tight across his shoulders since his back was turned as he fixed her drink…well she wasn't going to complain. She bit her lower lip and admired his ass.

He glanced over his shoulder. "I think you liked it neat?"

She blinked and slowly let her eyes slide up to his. She smiled and almost purred. "I like a man who remembers details." She held out her hand as he got closer and took the scotch. "So, what exactly did you want to discuss Matthew Donnally?"

Matt took the chair he'd been in earlier when he'd talked to Nico. He watched her, he knew she was eyeing him like the bitch in heat she was. She had a habit of doing that anytime she showed up at the office, well almost anytime. If Nico wasn't around she did. If Marshall was around she was twice as bad as usual. Nico usually took the brunt of her heated stares and pawing if he was there. Matt sipped his own drink and then set it down on the glass table beside him.

"I had a few questions and Nico seemed to think you'd be able to answer them." The corners of his lips lifted when the mention of the other man's name suddenly shifted her eyes from passionate possibility to ice cold distain.

She took a long sip, downing half her glass and then nodding. "Props for pouring the good stuff, but what the hell did that asshole think I could answer for you that he couldn't tell you?" She sat back, crossed her arms and held her glass against her chest. Her eyebrow was up in challenge.

Matt cleared his throat. "Well, he's dating my ex and…"

She laughed, interrupting him. "You want her back and you want me to help you?" She lifted her glass and downed the rest of the scotch. She shook her head. "I'm all for screwing people over, but I'm a bit above junior high antics, so if that's what you want, thanks for the drink and I'm leaving." She put the glass down and started to stand.

Matt grabbed her forearm before she stood and looked her in the eyes. "No, you misunderstood, please just hear me out."

She looked at him and smiled. "I'll hear you out, but you'll owe me Mr. Donnally. Are we clear on that?"

He couldn't believe that dealing with this half of the Pittman marriage was just as bad as the other half, but it was; hell, possibly worse. He doubted Marshall would ever ask him for certain favors that Gabby just might. He started to seriously consider if this had been a mistake. It was bad enough to owe Marshall a favor. Owing Gabrielle one? He nodded, "Fine."

She sat back and crossed her legs which dragged her skirt high on her thigh. "Fine, then I'll hear you out, but not here, over dinner. I already have reservations at Daniel at eight. Would you like my driver to pick you up?"

He watched her face and then was distracted as she adjusted the hem of skirt. The woman was beautiful; he wasn't going to deny it. He swallowed. "I can get there."

She smiled. "Parking is a bear that time of night, are you sure?" She uncrossed her legs and leaned forward, she saw the path of his eyes shift to her cleavage. "I don't want you to be late. Chef Daniel is a personal friend and he knows I'm coming, if I show up late…" she shook her head and pouted. "That's not going to happen Matthew now is it?"

"No." He shifted a bit uncomfortably as blood moved south. "But, you're right parking is a pain in the ass on Friday night in the city." His eyes moved to her face and caught her licking her lips as she smiled. God he was in trouble and he knew it. "I'll still be here at six thirty."

"Mm, then I'll have Brad pick you up here. If we're early we'll have a couple drinks then." She reached out and touched his jaw. "Do shave though, that's not going to do at all and I assume you have something to change into?" She ran her painted finger nails down the stubble on his cheeks.

Matt sat back and nodded. "I know how to dress for dinner Gabrielle." He stood and moved to his desk, breaking her hold on him. God she was getting under his skin and she knew it.

She smiled and moved to the coat hooks by the door. "I'll see you at eight then Mr. Donnally. I look forward to hearing your queries then." She took her coat, waved and sauntered out his door.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Nico gathered the bowls and nudged Juliette as he headed toward the kitchen. "Help me with drinks." He gave her a stern look making sure she understood that there was to be no question and no complaint. He watched her look down and swallow, but she nodded.

He glanced at everyone else before he left. "How about picking a movie? We'll get popcorn."

Lindsay smiled and pulled the remote from her brother's lap and the bickering started.

Dani didn't even try to stop it. She was thrilled to hear it. Happy to have both kids home. She was happy that her daughter was healthy enough to be angry at her brother and arguing about what movie to watch and she smiled at Nico. "Do you need my help?"

He shook his head. "No, Juliette's going to help like I asked aren't you Juliette?"

The girl sighed and pushed up from the arm chair she was occupying. "Yea, I'm coming." She rolled her eyes and followed Nico into the kitchen and away from the discussion over action movie or comedy.

She leaned against the counter and watched as Nico rinsed the ice cream bowls and then she moved to take them and put them in the dishwasher. She didn't say anything. She just waited and hoped he'd let it go, but she knew he wasn't going to.

"So, what is it?" He rinsed a bowl and handed it to her. "It's not the drugs, so what is it Juliette?" He rinsed the five spoons, turned off the water and then leaned against the counter waiting for her to take them from him. He watched as she put the bowl in the dishwasher and then pulled the silverware from his hand. "I mean I know you're lying to me, hiding something. Did you get in trouble for something else? Fighting?" He sighed. "You've done that before, but usually you get your ass kicked out for that, so I figured that's not it."

She shut the dishwasher and leaned against the adjoining counter. She crossed her arms and looked at him. "Can't you just let me live my life?"

He smiled wryly. "I've tried that before and it doesn't work. Your parents did that most of their lives Juliette." He looked her in the eye. "This is exactly where it got you. I know you're technically an adult, but you aren't making very adult choices yet, so drop the bullshit and tell me what the hell you're avoiding me for, or better yet, stop doing things that make you avoid me."

"Fine, you want the truth? I like a guy in rehab and we sort of made out." She blushed and looked away. "I swear to you that's it."

Nico's breath left him in a long exhale. "That's all? You kissed a boy and you liked it?" He paused and mentally went through the list of men in the rehab center. He knew who was there and what they were there for. He pushed away from the wall. "Wait a sec, There are only four men there that are even remotely your type." He continued working on the men in his head.

She stepped toward him and cocked her head. "Hey, how would you know my type? She poked a finger in the center of his chest? I don't even know my type." She stuck her tongue out at him.

He looked down at her. "Well, you said it was a guy, so that eliminates the girls, not that there were that many."

She snorted. "No and none of them were my type at all."

He laughed. "You like guys with cash Juliette, so that puts them on your side of the dorm. On that side, there are," he closed his eyes and counted mentally for three seconds, "ten men, but only three of them meet the other two requirements."

"Those are what Nico?" She crossed her arms and flipped her hair over her shoulder.

He smiled. She wasn't letting it cover her face anymore. "Good looking with a good physique and there are only six in that category and then we have to bring it down to age. I'm pretty sure anyone over forty is pretty much out for you."

She frowned. "Okay, for the most part anyway you're probably right." She went through the list. On her list there were four men left, not three. "So, who's on your list then?" She challenged.

"Kevin Anderson, Nathan Berger and Henry Nunez, which one is it Juliette because I want more info on him?"

She smirked and shook her head. "You're the great Nico Careles. You should have to figure it out yourself."

He stepped away, moved to the pantry where he pulled out the popcorn and then he found the air popper. He measured and poured, placed the bowl from the top cabinet and turned it on. He grabbed Juliette's arm and looked down at her once the popper was loudly purring.

"Don't you dare play games with me Juliette. I know you remember how I can be and just because your father's dead doesn't mean I won't play hardball with you again." He sighed, let go of her arm and shoved a hand through his hair. "Now, tell me who it is or I will find out and when I do well, neither of you will like the result."

She bit her lip. "I really like him Nico. Like really, really like him and I think this could be different because he's different. He knows what this shit is like and how things are, you know living life like this…" she waved her hand around. "You know with people always watching you, seeing you…" she blinked back tears and then crossed her arms and hugged herself. "He understands it and gets things. I don't know what's going to happen and nothing has happened beyond that one kiss, which I stopped because it was the right thing to do. I don't want the relationship to start in rehab. I want to see what happens when we're out, but I don't want you." She glared up at him. "My guardian angel, surrogate father and all around pain in the ass Nico, fucking things up for me just because of who he is and what he's done and what you know about him."

She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and bit her lip.

Nico was confused. He looked down at her because he knew he was missing something. The popcorn popper was blowing hot air, the corn had finished and he moved to turn it off. He watched as she opened the fridge and went through the steps to melt butter in the microwave. He got glasses for drinks and poured and as he finished it hit him.

"Oh my god." He put the pitcher of lemonade down and turned to the girl who he considered his daughter. "I didn't even put him in the list Juliette because I thought you both knew better. I warned him."

She looked over at him and shook her head. "You can't keep me from seeing him if I want to see him Nico. He makes me smile and he doesn't treat me like I'm some special doll or princess. He doesn't treat me like I'm broken either."

"Do you know how many girls Terrence King runs through in a season; hell in a night he's had four, five in his room." He watched as she buttered the popcorn.

She nodded sadly. "Do you want to know how many men have been in my bed at a time Nico?" She looked up at him. "And I'm not talking about when I was too high to say no." She cocked an eyebrow at him. "When you're unhappy, you look for something to fill the hole inside you." She stirred the popcorn and poured more butter. "Drugs, sex, alcohol…any of it works for a short period of time." She looked up. "I did the same thing. It made the pain go away, it felt good, but in the morning you just feel worse. So, the next night you think, maybe six or seven guys or girls, it doesn't always matter, more alcohol, more drugs…"

He gasped. "I'm sorry Juliette, so damn sorry…" He pulled her into his arms, crushed her against his chest and held her. "I wish I could make the pain go away. I wish I could have been there then, to stop it. To stop them."

She clung to him, her tears wet his t-shirt and she nodded against him. "I know and you were there…you always were there when I called, but I pushed you away, pushed dad and mom away too." She pulled back. "Right now though, don't judge him by a different standard than you judge me, because that's what you're doing. If he's a horrible person for all the sex, drugs and partying, then so am I. You can't have it both ways. We're both recovering, yes. We both risk relapse, yes. But, we both know and understand that and I want to wait until we're both out before we try."

"That's probably one of the most adult things you've ever said to me." He smiled and kissed her forehead.

"So, you're not going to break his kneecaps?"

Nico snorted. "Well, I'd lose my job if I did that," He cocked his head, "So no, but I will threaten to cut off one of his balls and hang it from my rearview mirror if he hurts you." When she started to laugh he smiled. "Notice, I said one, he'll still be perfectly able to function with one intact testicle. I wouldn't ruin the rest of your life if things worked out for the two of you. I just want to inflict pain."

"The movie's ready…we're waiting on the popcorn." Dani sidled up to the counter. She took in Juliette's tear streaked face and Nico's concerned one. "Is everything okay in here?" She added with concern.

Juliette stood on her toes and pressed a kiss to Nico's cheek as she hugged him. "I think so. I love you, by the way. I'll take the popcorn out if you two get the drinks." She stepped back and on impulse hugged Dani too. "I love you too."

Dani hugged the girl. "I love you." She gave Nico a look over Juliette's shoulder.

He shrugged. "I love you, kiddo."

She snorted, popped some corn in her mouth and ducked out of the kitchen with the bowl under her arm.

Dani shot a concerned look at Nico. "You mind telling me what that was all about?"

He sighed and pulled her into his arms. He simply rested his chin on the top of her head. "Juliette has a thing for TK and she is insisting that I don't interfere. They haven't done more than kiss and she doesn't plan on anything more until they are both out of rehab. He understands her. His being a "player" is just his way of filling the holes in his life the same way she did with drugs, alcohol and sex, so I shouldn't judge him harsher than I judge her…" He said it all in a big rush and then sighed again, waiting to see what Dani would say.

"Hmm, well she's right and it sounds like she heard it in group therapy." She looked up when Nico pushed her back by her shoulders. "What? You don't think that's what he's doing with the girls and partying? He's looking to fill the loneliness, but what he wants is someone in his life to come home to, to be there for him."

"Really?" He shook his head. "TK wants one girl, all the time?"

"Yes, really, he's a good boy in a bad boy persona." She took his hand. "Let the two of them see what happens. It might explode, but she needs to learn what that for herself. A broken heart is a part of growing up. You had yours broken. It hurts, but it's part of life."

He nodded. "Okay. I'm still cutting off one of his balls if he hurts her."

Dani laughed. "What?"

Nico proceeded to tell her what he meant.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Matt sat across from Gabrielle and waited as the wine was poured. She'd already selected something before he'd arrived and he had arrived on time, but she'd obviously been seated early. He wasn't surprised. She thanked the sommelier, but he waited as she picked up her glass and sniffed and then tasted the wine.

"Perfect." She smiled at him again and he nodded and then poured a glass for her guest.

"I'm glad you approve, Ms. Pittman. Is there anything else I can do for you?" He asked in a slight accent.

"No thank you Raj, I think we're good, as always." She touched his hand and smiled charmingly.

He nodded and moved off toward the back of the restaurant.

Matt picked up the glass and sipped. He was impressed. "This is very good."

She smiled. "Raj is the head sommelier," she leaned forward, "he'd only bring the best to my table." She leaned back and surveyed the crowd in the room as she crossed her legs.

Matt took in her change in clothes. She now wore a black dark blue dress, cut incredibly low across her breasts. There were diamonds at her throat and in her ears. Her heels were high and black and she licked her lips and he noticed they were deep red. He'd adjusted his own wardrobe to a dark suit, white French cuffed shirt and grey and black striped silk tie. He'd had client meetings at Daniel before. He had no problem knowing what was appropriate, though he'd be the first to admit that his current companion was by far the sexiest he'd been with.

"I'm sure he wouldn't dare bring anything else." He sipped and put the glass down.

"You do clean up nice Matthew. I figured you would and I took the liberty of ordering the six course tasting menu for both of us." She smiled again. "That will give us plenty of time for you to ask your questions and get your answers." She leaned closer. "I hope that's okay?"

What was he going to say, though he really hoped she was picking up the tab. Not that he wouldn't, but still, he didn't want to pay the what, at least two hundred dollars a person, plus wine costs. He smiled. "That sounds perfect Gabrielle; I hear the sampling menu is excellent here." He had heard that, though he never thought to experience it.

"It's quite exquisite." She looked up just as the waiter was bringing their first course. "And it looks like we're about to find out."

He watched as the food was placed in front of them and the waiter announced what it was with a flourish and then vanished.

"I hope you like squab." Gabrielle picked up her fork and started on the small salad watching him as she did. She was in control, just the way she liked it and she had no intention of letting that control slip.

Matt smiled and nodded, thinking to himself that he hoped he did too. "I do." He took a hesitant bite and it was good, so he ate and was pleased to find that the wine was excellently paired with the food.

It was quiet for a minute and then Matt asked, "So, can I ask you something?"

She set down her fork and dabbed at her mouth. She nodded as she reached for her glass. "I believe that is why you came." She sipped her wine and watched him.

"It's pretty much common knowledge that you were having an affair with Careles while you were married to Marshall, but at some point you broke it off with him. Why?"

She smiled. "Common knowledge?" She set down her glass. "That's rich since Marshall had no idea that I was sleeping with him. Sure, he knew I was sleeping with someone, and there were more someone's than just Nico Careles, by the way, but he did not know about Nico at all." She leaned closer to Matt. "So, tell me how it was common knowledge Mr. Donnally. I'm intrigued." She picked up her fork and continued on her salad.

Matt cleared his throat and speared more food, put it in his mouth and chewed. He gathered his thoughts as he tried to figure out exactly what he wanted to say. He swallowed and watched as the viperous woman across the small table scrutinized him. "Let's put it this way Gabrielle, every single time you came to the office without your husband you oozed sexuality around any available male, I won't deny that, but with Nico," he snorted and set down his fork. He picked up his wine, drank and then set it down as well. "With Nico Careles it was different. You oozed, but only for him. You ignored everyone else, except maybe in an attempt to make him jealous. The two of you went to dinner, the two of you took his car places and he was seen in your company more often than not. And don't go telling me it was because he worked for your husband. You always had your own security with you. You didn't need additional security and I saw footage of the two of you a bit too close for simple discussions a few times." He shook his head. "Oh, Careles is careful. He knows the angle of every camera in the office, but his hand would linger just a little too long sometimes. The same way it does with Dani Santino now." He nodded. "So yes obvious, if you cared to look."

Her eyebrow was up and she smiled. "Well bravo to the assistant GM." She lifted her glass and then drank. She kept her eyes on him as she did. She lowered her glass and licked the wine, a bit suggestively, from her lips. "Bravo, so you know we were fucking behind Marshall's back and you think I put an end to it?"

Matt looked up at her confused. He nodded. "Yes, and I'd like to know why."

She laughed, it was lyrical and she put her glass down just as the waiter came to remove their salad. She smiled and kept her eyes on Matt as they waited for Raj first to pour the wine in preparations for the next course. She lifted the glass, tasted and smiled at Raj. "This is wonderful as well. I can't wait for the food to accompany it."

"I'll tell the chef." He nodded and then was gone with a wink.

Gabrielle returned her gaze to Matt. "You have the wrong information Donnally. I didn't end the relationship, or whatever it was we had."

He gave her a confused look. "But I thought that…I mean…"

She shook her head and shifted in her seat. She uncrossed her legs and then recrossed one over the other. "What did you think?" She raised an eyebrow. "Nico has an unusually strong sense of right and wrong. It finally caught up with him when Marshall asked him to find out who I was with. Was that the first time he'd stopped sleeping with me? No. We'd been through it so many times through the years; I hardly thought it would last. Hell, I'm still not convinced he'll be gone for good this time." She laughed. "You have no idea, absolutely no idea."

Matt's eyebrow rose at that bit of information and then he shook his head again. "So, what the hell was Nico insinuating then?" He rubbed a frustrated hand over his face feeling like he let the other man play him. He wouldn't deny he deserved it, because he was the one who had started it. If he'd been played after all, he was the one who'd accused Nico of horrible things. "He said you'd tell me all about it, because you were pissed at him."

She snorted. "I am, because he left me. I loved him and needed him." She shifted and the toe of her shoe ran up the inside of his calf. Her eyes were on his as this happened.

He knew it wasn't an accident. "You don't love him anymore?"

She shrugged. "I don't know how I feel about him. I still could use him. He has certain useful skills. He's very good at scratching certain itches." She sat back again and picked up her glass nonchalantly and sipped.

The waiter was back with their second course. He smiled and announced it, again with a flourish and then was gone.

Matt watched as she began to eat and pick at her cod salad. He picked up his fork and ate. Again, the food was excellent and he said so.

She nodded at him, lost in her thoughts. She put her fork down halfway through her course and picked up her wine. "So, he said I'd tell you, did he?" She shot him an evil smile. "Hmm, well I guess if he wants you to know, then fine." She pushed the salad to the side, snagging a slice of artichoke from the plate delicately with her fingers. She placed it on her tongue and chewed. When she was done she licked her fingers while the man across from her watched. "What do you want to know?"

He swallowed. She was dangerous. Not just a little bit, but seriously, mind numbingly dangerous. He took a few more bites of his salad, finishing it and then eased the plate to the side. He picked up his glass and sipped before easing back in his chair. He watched her as he gathered his thoughts. He played the wine around in the glass and watched it swirl as he did he spoke. "There are rumors and no, don't ask how I know or where I heard them because it's all just whispers in the wind and I couldn't tell you exactly where I heard it, but there are rumors that Nico likes things a bit rough in bed." He looked up at her. "The rumor was that you kicked him out of your bed because of this."

If she wasn't in a completely public space with respectable people and a place that she wanted to return regularly, she would have burst out laughing hysterically. As it was, her shoulders shook with contained laughter and she set her glass down to dab her eyes with her napkin to preserve her makeup. "Oh…now that's rich." She almost snorted and then took a deep breath and shook her head as she waved a hand in front of her eyes to keep the tears at bay. "Wow," Her eyes were wide when she looked at Matt. "Really? I kicked him out of my bed because he liked it rough? Did you tell him that?" She giggled again.

Matt, again a bit confused and not sure what was so funny, nodded. "Yes, and he told me I should get the facts straight."

"Yes, you might want to." She smiled and picked up her glass. She drank and nodded when the waiter motioned to their plates. "Thank you." The waiter was gone in a flash and she focused back on Matt. "My, you have some interesting sources then. I just told you that it was Nico who ended things and over the years, it was always him who put the brakes on our relationship. Never me." She sipped from her glass and watched Matt's reaction. "I always wanted more from him." She waved her hand. "It's way more complicated a relationship than we could discuss over dinner and maybe even more complicated than you'd understand." She arched a brow.

"Try me." He heard the challenge in her voice and was willing to accept it. What was the worst that could happen? Was she really as dangerous as Nico warned him? She was a woman after all, not a wild animal.

She chuckled huskily. "Oh Matthew, Matthew, you are a bold boy aren't you?" She winked at him. "I'll tell you this; I was in love with Nico before I married Marshall. Marshall was in love with me. When Marshall saved Nico's live by paying for a team to go covertly in and rescue him Nico felt he owed Marshall, so he basically forced me to him. Up until that time, Nico and I were the couple. After that time, it was me and Marshall, but Nico and I could never quite quit each other." She smiled and then there was a pause as the next round of wine was poured for the next course.

When they were alone again, she continued. "Even after Marshall and I were married, Nico and me, well we still had our time. Marshall found out and as you know, Marshall didn't always handle things normally." She shrugged. "We were young, stupid and confused. Nico and Marshall were both scarred by war. Marshall more so and I was struggling to hold them both together. I'd grown to love Marshall by then and as wrong as it was, Marshall knew and encouraged Nico and I and then, it at times became a threesome." She watched Matt's face and wasn't surprised to see his shock.

"Oh my god." He picked up his wine and drank, downing half a glass.

The next course was placed in front of them and neither of them started immediately.

Then Gabrielle picked up her fork and motioned to the man across from her. "Now, if you want more answers, I'll gladly give them to you, but not during dinner. You owe me a favor I believe?"

He picked up his fork and cut a single ravioli in half. "I suppose I do." He lifted the fork to his mouth and chewed the bite. "God, that's wonderful."

She nodded. "Yes, it is. Isn't it?"

They ate in silence until Gabrielle had finished her entire plate. She set her fork down and wiped her lips. "So, after dinner you will accompany me to my hotel room and spend the night with me."

Matt choked on the food he was swallowing. He coughed, tears in his eyes as he stared across the table at the woman calmly sipping her wine. He wiped his mouth and took a sip of the water that suddenly appeared beside his plate. He looked up at the waiter. "Thank you."

"Is there anything else I can get you sir?" The waiter asked him sincerely, handing him a second napkin and discretely taking his first as well as their plates.

"No, no...thank you though." Matt picked up the water and drank. Thankful as he swallowed and his gaze returned to Gabrielle. When the waiter left and he could speak easier he leaned close, "What?"

She smiled. "You asked questions and you owe me a favor. I'm still willing to give you more answers, but really, you owe me even for what I've given you. So, like I said, you'll spend the night with me. I promise," She gave him a heady look through half open eyes. "You will get all the answers you want Mr. Donnally."

Nico's warning flashed into his head, but maybe that was just Nico being jealous. Damn, Nico had Dani, so why didn't he just take Gabrielle? Turn around is fair play…all is fair in love and war…keep your friends close and enemies closer. All sound advice and all fit his situation. He picked up the wine glass and eased back into his chair. He could definitely do worse than a night in bed with Gabrielle Pittman and seeing Marshall no longer owned the team and neither did she…"I'd absolutely love to Gabrielle."

A slow, sensual smile lit her face. "Well then, game on Matthew…game on."

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Dani stretched and yawned as the movie ended. She glanced over at Lindsay and noticed she'd fallen asleep. She smiled and motioned to Nico. "She didn't make it through."

He pulled Dani close and pressed a kiss to her cheek. "You want me to carry her up?"

"No, let me wake her slowly and I'll help her up and make sure she's okay." She leaned into him a second. "I'll meet you up there." She smiled and then stood and moved to the end of the couch where Lindsay was and shook her gently. "Linds baby, hey…let's head up to bed."

"Mom?" Lindsay jumped a bit and then blinked. She looked around. Saw her mother and then Nico. She saw Ray Jay and Juliette on the chair and then smiled. "Thank god I'm home." She sighed and nodded. "Bed, yea, sounds good." She glanced at Juliette. "You're sleeping upstairs right?"

Juliette smiled. "Right next door or I'll sleep with you if you want." She leaned up and twisted, popping her back. "I don't mind."

Lindsay smiled and nodded. "I might…" she looked at Dani. "Can you help me change mom, I'm still having a hard time getting my jeans off."

Dani nodded. "Sure, let's get you up the stairs then and Juliette can come up in a few." She glanced over her shoulder as she helped Lindsay up.

"Like I said, no problem." She smiled and then sank back into the chair beside a snoring Ray Jay. She glanced at Nico. "How do you boys do that?"

He rolled his head on the couch and looked at her. "What?"

She lifted her hand and motioned to the snuffling boy beside her. "Sleep through everything?" She rolled her eyes and then stood and moved to the couch. She watched as Ray Jay resettled himself on the chair and mumbled. "Every man I've been with, dad, him…hell, even you, though you I can't sneak past, but you'll sleep through things too."

He smiled and shook his head. "I only pretend, usually I'm more than awake." He watched her. "But I think it's a genetic thing." He shrugged. "Not sure."

"Hmm, well it sucks whatever it is." She simply sat beside Nico and stared at the blank TV screen. "Did you ever wish it?"

"Wish what?" He sat up, leaned his elbows on his knees and looked over at her.

"That I would have been yours?" She kept her eyes straight ahead. "You know for real."

He sighed heavily. "There wasn't a day that went by that I didn't wish it." He smiled sadly. "But that doesn't change how I feel about you. It didn't then and it doesn't now. I've always thought of you as my daughter in my heart and you're my god-daughter. Now, well…" He shrugged. "I feel I have more of a reason to keep you close and protect you. I feel your father would want me to. He was always the buffer for your mother and now that he's gone you need someone to be there for you."

She was quiet for quite some time and then she spoke. "Dad told me, when I was little that if anything ever happened to him that I needed to go to you; that I should call you first if we were out of the country. He made me promise."

"I never knew that." He grunted softly at the revelation, but then there was quite a bit he never knew about Marshall he was sure. "There's something I need to talk to you about too." He sat forward and looked at her again. "There's a problem with the ownership of the team."

"What exactly does this have to do with me?" She fiddled with the edge of a throw on the back of the couch.

"You need to sign some papers so that the sale can go through. It's just a formality. It gives the league the rights to act as your sales agent basically." He watched her face and saw when the realization that she still owned the team hit her. He knew she was shrewd. So much like her mother and father combined.

She smiled. "So, what you're saying Nico is that at this time, I own the team and they can't sell, unless I agree?" She leaned eagerly toward him. "I could just keep the team. Make it mine?"

He shook his head. "No. Your father's will states that the team will be sold, I'm pretty sure he wants you to have the money from the team, and your father had signed the forms already, but since you are now owner, we need you to sign a new set. It's really just a formality."

She sighed. "I'd love to have the team. Dad loved it and it would be a way to keep a part of him with me and it's fun to pretend it could be mine, but if I want to be with TK, there's no way I can own the team now can I?"

Nico shook his head. Her attitude showed maturity, maybe she was growing up. "No, you really can't." He frowned. "So, you'll sign the papers?"

"Yes I'll sign them, but not tonight." She leaned over and kissed the man beside her on the cheek. "I love you and thanks for always being there, even when I don't want you to be." She stood. "I'm heading to bed, or at least to keep an eye on Lindsay."

"Wake us if you need us."

"Then you better sleep in some shorts," she said over her shoulder, "because, I don't want to barge in on you au naturel."

He shook his head and watched her turn the corner. He picked up the popcorn bowl and stacked the cups before he nudged Ray Jay. "Hey kid, head up to bed."

"Yea, fine." He grumbled and stood up and then headed for the stairs. "Nico, you mind if I ask you something?" He paused suddenly, pivoted and turned to face the other man.

"Sure kid, what's on your mind?" Nico really was done with teen drama for the night, but he didn't have a choice. He carried the bowl and cups to the kitchen and expected Ray Jay to follow, which he did.

"Just curious, but did Juliette just say she was with TK and you not threaten to kill him, because I sort of remember a death threat if I looked at her sideways." He paused outside the kitchen. "What's the deal there?"

"The deal is, your mother doesn't want you involved with her and I'm dating your mother. Since, I'm dating your mother, I want her happy…" He paused, gave the kid a suggestive look. "You see how that needs to work. You get my drift here Ray Jay?"

Ray Jay coughed. "Dude, really?' He pulled a face. "That's my mom you know?"

Nico laughed. "I know and it didn't stop you and Juliette from commenting earlier about our bedroom activities, so I figured you wouldn't mind the discussion now." He got a bit more serious.

Ray Jay sighed. "Fine." He scratched his head. "But, really? Juliette and TK?"

He shrugged. "She's picked worse guys and I have some control over TK, so he's a hell of a lot better than most choices." He flipped the lights off and motioned toward the stairs. "I don't need to tell you that this goes nowhere. The press, your friends, no one finds out."

Ray Jay made a zipper motion over his lips. "Fort Knox man, nothing…CIA secrets."

"Okay, a simple yes was all I needed, but good enough." His phone chimed as they reached the bottom of the stairs. He motioned to Ray Jay. "Night kid."

Ray Jay headed up the stairs. "Night Nico, see ya in the morning…four miles right?"

Nico chuckled and nodded. "Yes, four and I'll be waking you up at six." He didn't look up as he pulled his phone from the pocket of his jeans.

It was a text from AJ. Just an update and it read: FYI, shut down 2 sites. Both vids present, no new source. Both codes out of EU.

He frowned and texted back his thanks and a good work. He headed up the stairs. He checked on the girls and told them both good night. They were sitting on Lindsay's bed chatting as he smiled, pulled the closed and then moved down the hall into the master bedroom.

Dani was just exiting the bathroom as he locked the door. She was rubbing lotion into her hands and up her forearms. She smiled at him and purred. "Mm, I was wondering if you got lost."

He met her halfway across the room and slipped his arms around her. He buried his nose in her hair and inhaled her scent. "No. I was just talking to Juliette. She was in the mood to talk and then, so was Ray Jay." He stayed there for a few seconds and let her go as he moved to the bathroom to ready for bed.

"She'd already told you what was going on. Was there something else bothering her?" Dani asked as she sat on the bed and rubbed lotion into her heels. It was quiet for a few seconds, then the toilet flushed and water ran.

Then Nico appeared in the doorway with his toothbrush. "Other than her being hot for TK…" He sighed "She just wanted to ask how I felt about being her surrogate father." He shoved his toothbrush in his mouth as he smiled and started brushing.

Dani knew he was holding something back. She followed him back into the bathroom. "You know, I'm still struggling with that some. Really, TK? Why is it someone at rehab? Oh, I'm not sure that's a good idea. Two recovering addicts? Does he like her back? Please tell me they haven't been screwing around in rehab. Corinne will kick them both out. Damn, I sound like I'm in junior high?" She giggled as she waited for Nico to finish brushing his teeth.

He spit and raised an eyebrow as he went back to brushing without confirming or denying anything.

She knew what he was doing. "Will you hurry the hell up?" She shoved his arm and laughed when he turned the water on, wet his hand and spritzed her with water. "You got me wet."

"Are you wet, or are you…wet?" He chuckled, spit, rinsed his mouth and his brush and then as he turned off the water, he side stepped to pin her against the vanity. He smiled down at her. He caught sight of his face in the mirror and wiped a streak of white, foam from the corner of his mouth with his thumb. His eyebrow rose. "You know, you'd probably look much sexier than I do with a messy mouth Danielle." He whispered suggestively against her ear.

She gripped his hips and shivered as she stared up at him. "God…the places you send my mind."

"Are exactly where I want them to be." He kissed a path from her ear to her lips and kissed her. Then he pulled back and answered her, suddenly serious. "Juliette and TK, hard to fathom I know." He watched her face and nodded.

"It is and it isn't. I mean right now they're in a similar place so they're bonding. Two addicts with money, they know the same people…" She shook her head. "I hope they don't do anything stupid." She closed her eyes. "I really wished they were both a little more settled, a little more mature. I'm just worried."

He smiled and cocked his head to the side as he pulled back arm's length. "Have you met her? Him? I could introduce you. She's the daughter of Marshall and Gabrielle, my god daughter, queen of unsettled and yes, all around maker of stupid choices. He's the star running back of the Hawks, on the front page of the sports section for, 'Look what the dumbass did now' on an ongoing basis." He laughed. "You don't think that this is classic Juliette and stupid TK, Dani?" He took a breath and his eyebrows pulled together. "Honestly, I think you were right earlier. They actually might be okay this time."

Dani moved around him. She hoped they were right. "I hope so, but the odds aren't good. They're both addicts, just recovering mind you and neither one of them has a solid clue about who they are or what they need. I worry about how the hell they're going to form a healthy relationship?" She was in the bedroom and she turned when Nico followed her. She was worried about both of them. She loved them both, or was really starting to love Juliette anyway.

Nico watched Dani sit on the bed and he understood her frustration. He felt it, but they had no right interfering. Hell, he wanted to tell Juliette no, but he knew if he did, she'd just double down and be all that more determined. She'd done it before. She was Marshall and Gabby's daughter after all. If he told either of them no, the same thing happened. He pulled his t-shirt off, folded it and placed it on the dresser and then slipped off his jeans.

Dani was distracted by Nico undressing even though she should be used to it. He undressed for bed every night, but her heart skipped a beat or two, she would swear it did, when he bent over to pick his phone up when it slid from the pocket of the jeans he'd just removed. She must have made a sound because he turned to look at her.

He smiled. "You're red Dani, what's got you all flushed baby?"

She shook her head. "Nothing, it's just warm in here." She stood and pulled the throw pillows from the bed and turned down the comforter. "I don't understand how you can be so calm about Juliette and Terrence." She huffed and climbed into bed, leaned back against the headboard and pulled the comforter up under her armpits like armor. She watched as he walked around to the other side of the bed casually. "I really did figure you'd be over there actually cutting off his singular ball like you threatened." She giggled.

He sat and as he took off his watch, set it on the end table and plugged in his phone. When he started speaking there was a smile in his voice. "Well, we can't control them Danielle." He finished, flipped off the light and rolled onto his side. He propped two pillows under his head and looked over at her. "Come down here and talk to me."

She sighed in resignation and slid down into the bed. She lay on her side and faced him. She blinked into the darkness. "I know we can't, but I'm worried and scared. I'm just not sure they should do this."

He reached out and pushed the hair off her cheek and smiled at her. "I know, but when you were with Ray, did your mom tell you he was bad for you?"

Dani snorted. "Hell no, ma loved Ray. Star quarterback, rah-rah…go Ray!"

He rolled his eyes; he figured Dani's mom would be like that. "Okay, but if she had, what do you think you would have done?"

"I would have married him anyway, just to spite her." She snorted. "Hell, I should have not married him to spite her, but I got pregnant with Ray Jay, so…and I know what you're saying. I get it, but the therapist side of me sees all the bad decision parts of this and is screaming, 'Don't do it!'".

He pulled her closer and kissed the top of her head and rolled so that she was resting against his chest. "I hear you. I want to tell them the same thing and if he hurts her, I'm going to kill him, because I know how to hide a body so no one finds it."

She pinched him and kissed his chest. "I love you so much, you know that right?" She looked up at him from his chest. "I love that you say you'll do that and you never would. I love that you actually could do that." She snuggled against him. "It makes me feel safe." She shivered and pressed against him. "You'll never know how much it means to me knowing that…what…thank you for bringing my baby home Nico." She sniffed softly against his chest as emotion suddenly overwhelmed her. "Hell, I don't even know where that came from."

"Shh." He kissed her temple and her forehead and pulled her closer. "You don't have to know. I'm here baby and you're welcome. I love you and I'd do it again and again for you, Lindsay, Ray Jay or Juliette." He tilted her chin up so he could see her face. "You mean the world to me."

She smiled and wiped her face, then pressed it against his chest and shoulder. "I don't know what I did in this life to deserve you, but I'm glad I did it."

He pulled her closer and held her. He wanted to tell her that there was no way it worked that way because if he got the person he deserved he'd be stuck with Gabrielle Pittman for all eternity. He almost laughed and for a split second he wondered what happened with Donnally, but Dani's sweet body was pressed against him and her hand was wandering over his hip as she lapped as his right nipple.

"I thought you were tired Danielle?" His voice was lower than before and he lifted his hips slightly against her palm when her hand brushed against him. He smiled as she stroked him and he hardened quickly. He moaned as she wrapped her hand around him and stroked up and down.

"I am."

"Then what are you doing?" He didn't stop her, he let her play, just lay as he was on his back while her hand jacked him off. He groaned when she paused and pulled the covers from them. The cooler air hit him and he gasped. He smiled when she sat up on her knees and pulled her knee length night shirt over her head. "Mm, much better." His left hand trailed up the outside of her thigh to the curve of her hip and teased to her navel. He watched her face as two of his fingers moved lower, lower, to her curls, and then he brushed over her clit. He slid his fingers one on each side of the sensitive nub and started a rhythm of back and forth. "Don't stop what you were just doing baby…"

Dani was mesmerized by his touch. It was different, pressure on both sides at the same time, friction and a pulling but pushing sensation all at once. She blinked when he spoke to her. His voice was thick with need. She swallowed and shifted closer. It changed the angle of his fingers and she gasped, which then changed to a short moan as she reached for him and took him back into her hand.

His closed briefly and then opened. "Wet your hand for me." He slid his fingers against her clit, pinching lightly as he did, she was slick and there was little friction as his fingers moved over her. "Do it Dani."

He waited and arched into her palm. God, watching her was so damn hot. She was straining against his hand, her nipples were hard. She was moving into his palm and stroking him. That alone was almost enough to get him off. He smiled when she let go of him and lifted her hand to her mouth.

She smiled at him. He had her on fire. Why what they were doing had her so turned on she didn't know, but watching his face was killing her. She kept her eyes on his as she opened her mouth and stuck out her tongue. She licked her palm and felt almost dirty doing it, but it sent heat through her. She was sure to slick her palm well, and her fingers and then she licked the bottom edge of her little finger.

He moaned, his cock jumped and then her hand was around him again. "Fuck yes." He slid through her slick hand as he raised his hips. "Mm, perfect." He watched her face and thrust upward. "Very nice baby, I like that."

Dani twisted and pulled as he jacked him and rocked against his fingers. She really wanted more. She wanted to feel him inside her, but this was intoxicating. She bit her lip and thrust against him. Her head fell back, but she kept watching Nico. He was sexy and breathtaking in his pleasure. "Oh god…yes…Nico." She moaned when he slid his fingers further back and they just barely dipped inside. Her body reacted by tightening around the tips of his fingers. "Oh god…" Her eyes went wide.

He smiled at her and repeated the same motion over and over, shallowly dipping his fingers inside until he knew she was going to go over the edge. "So close Dani…I feel it…" He teased her again, thrust up into her palm and then let his fingers slide deep inside.

She moaned, her legs shook, her thighs almost shaking the entire bed. "Nico, oh my god…" She somehow managed to keep some kind of motion going with her hand, but it was in starts and fits. "Oh, fuck…" Her body clenched around his fingers as waves of pleasure shook her. She rode them and watched his face as he smiled up at her. She could tell he needed her. She smiled back at him, leaned forward as she panted over him and then she kissed him slowly. She tasted the toothpaste he'd just used as she deepened the kiss and drew him into it.

He let her kiss him and pulled his fingers slowly from her as her body relaxed him. Her hand was still stroking him, though it was almost an afterthought as she kissed him and he was getting more desperate as the kiss deepened. By the time she lifted her head and smiled down at him, he was about to say something, but he didn't have to.

She reached for his hand and pulled his fingers into her mouth.

He moaned and arched up into her hand sharply. "God, Danielle…"

She smiled, licked off his fingers and then pulled them from her mouth. "What do you want?"

He groaned. He hadn't meant to make this about him. This was simple sex, give and take. He lifted his hips into her hand. "God Dani, I want to cum so badly right now, but your mouth please." He lifted his hand to her shoulder and slid it into her hair. "Oh god, that's what I want." He watched her lick her lips and smile at him as he gathered her hair.

Dani groaned. There was something about hearing him tell her he wanted her that way. It sent heat straight through her. "Oh god…" She settled by his hip and still holding him she lowered herself over him. She watched his face as she licked the tip of him and then swirled it around him. She flattened her tongue and let him slide nice and deep inside, then sucked as he pulled most of the way out. She watched his face as she did this.

Nico kept her hair lightly fisted in his hand and lifted his hips as she lowered her head. "Yesss, Dani...oh fuck yes." When she gradually increased her pace, he followed, but did press. He watched her and he had already been close. He groaned and pulled at her hair. "Dani…I'm gonna cum baby."

She smiled around him. She knew. She felt the way his balls tightened against his body and she sensed the rising tension in his muscles, the way they twitched and pulled. She heard the hitch in his breathing. She caught his eye and nodded slightly even as she doubled her efforts and took him deeper. She struggled some to accommodate him, and she breathed out as she lifted her head quickly from him.

She licked her lips. "It's okay." She took him back in her mouth and tried not to laugh at his face because it was priceless and if she could take a picture, she would.

He moaned, he loved her so much and god he wanted to kiss her, spank her, fuck down her throat and a few other things right now. He tightened his hand in her hair and canted his hips, not because he was taking over, but because instinct took over. The urge to thrust was overwhelming as the need to cum rose up and he used the hold on her head to keep her from taking him as deep as she probably would have and to keep himself from thrusting down her throat, because he saw what he wanted and struggled not to take it. He threw his head back and came in three shallow thrusts with his back arched on the bed as he gasped and groaned.

"God…Danielle…Shit…what you do to me…" He looked up to see her smiling at him and wiping at her mouth with her hand as she swallowed. His hand massaged the back of her head and he pulled her down onto his chest because he didn't feel he had the energy to sit up quite yet. He smiled at her, sated and out of breath. "You didn't have to do that."

She wiped her mouth again. "I know, but I wanted to." She looked at him sheepishly.

He leaned in, cupped the back of her head and pressed her to head toward his. "That was amazing." He brushed her lips with his and then his tongue slid against her mouth. When she tried to pull back he didn't let her, but deepened the kiss. His tongue stroked against hers slowly until she moaned and kissed him back.

Dani didn't want him to kiss her quite so deeply. Shit, really not after what she'd just done, but he wasn't letting up and his hand was pressing her closer and finally she gave in with a moan. Her tongue skimmed along his and then clashed against with it. There was a small battle; all parry and thrust and her hands curled in the hair on his chest until she was forced to come up for air. She pulled away with a small gasp and her glazed eyes blinked at him, out of focus and hazy as she smiled slow and languid. She felt like melted butter and her muscles were heavy and warm.

He smiled at her, kissed her nose and pulled her close. "Let's get some sleep." He bit back a yawn rolled half to his side, taking her with him. He tucked a pillow under his head and angled it so Dani's head rested on it instead of fully on his arm. He smiled when she snuggled her nose to his chest.

"Mm, sleep sounds good." She rubbed a foot up his leg.

He nodded. "Yes…it does." He managed to nudge the comforted high enough up the bed with his foot, so he could snag it with his right arm. He pulled it up over them both. "I'll see you in the morning."

"M'kay." She mumbled and snuggled under the covers.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Matt wondered why he'd agreed to go to her hotel room. He wondered why he hadn't listened to Nico and he wondered how he was going to ever think of Gabrielle Pittman the same again. He was also going to give Nico some serious credit for dealing with her, because he winced as he turned off his shower and then reached for a towel. He was sore as fuck after last night.

The woman had an appetite for sex, and pain and the two mixed in not equal measures. She liked handing out pain and she didn't mind asking for it either, but the bruises on Matt's ass and back from her nails, teeth and those wicked heels. Now, he understood why she wore them and why a knife and the shoe shared a name.

"Holy fuck." He looked at a particularly nasty bruise on his chest, most likely from the heel of a shoe. He rubbed at it and then winced again. "How did Nico survive her?" He shook his head and then turned to his bedroom. He was going back to bed. She'd had him up most of the night and god, it hadn't been in a good way.

He fell into his bed and pulled a pillow over his head before he pulled the sheet over his naked body. She'd told him that with Nico it was about her getting the pain, not him. Well, that was not what he'd wanted to hear. He moaned and rolled stiffly onto his stomach. He was sort of hoping that if spankings were involved between Nico and Dani that Dani was the one holding the proverbial hairbrush. He got comfortable, sighed and closed his eyes. "No dreams from last night…no dreams from last night…no dreams from last night…"

He didn't want to see Gabby in a red and black corset. He didn't want to see himself eating her out because she said so. He didn't want to see himself on the floor, on his back as she walked, literally, all over him in those damned spiked heels. No, he didn't want to see that, and dammit it wasn't going to get him hard, that's for fuck sake.


	30. Daydreams, Nightmares and Dream Weavers

**Nightmares, Daydreams and Dream Weavers**

Nico stood in the kitchen and stared into the back yard. He was lost in his thoughts, not really focused on anything particular, more a random rush of thoughts, memories and plans that were coming together in his head. He cocked his head to the side and smiled, brought his coffee mug to his lips and sipped absently.

"What are you thinking about Mr. Careles?"

Dani's voice interrupted him and then her arms slid around him as she pressed against him and moved to stand against his side.

He glanced down at her. She was in her night shirt and robe. Her hair was pulled back in a messy, but sexy knot at the nape of her neck. He smiled and looped an arm around her. "I was just thinking about pulling up that rhododendron out there and moving it." He pointed to the plant. "It's not getting enough shade. It will do better under the trees over there." He indicated an area under two old oaks. "I think maybe you need something else in its place."

She gave him a puzzled look and then reached for his coffee cup, took it, sniffed it and then sipped from it. "Did you spike the coffee this morning? You're daydreaming about landscaping?" She took his mostly empty mug and moved to the counter where she refilled it and then slid it back across the center island to him before finding her own mug and filling it. "Seriously?"

He smiled at her and glanced back outside before turned toward her. "I like it. I like getting my hands dirty. I like growing things." He picked up the navy blue mug and sipped carefully before sliding into a stool. "I'm good at it."

She eyed him as she added some cream to her cup. "Is there anything you aren't good at?"

He laughed. "Plenty of things, I'll be sure to make you a list." He winked at her. "Did Ray Jay wake you again?"

She shook her head. "No, I just missed you beside me." She took a hesitant sip and then joined him at the counter. "And I smelled the coffee."

He smiled and folded the newspaper open. "Well then I apologize for waking you." He glanced down the front page and read a bit, but he realized that Dani was watching him so he stopped and set the paper aside. "Did you want to talk baby?"

She watched him and sipped her coffee. "I'm just wondering, thinking, worried." She shrugged. "I can't get things out of my head." She put her cup down and reached across the counter with one hand.

Nico took her hand. "What are you worried about?" He let his fingers slide over her knuckles and watched as they did and then slowly his eyes found hers. "Lindsay? Ray Jay?" His eyebrow rose. "Us?"

"Yes…" She giggled nervously and squeezed his hand. "And Juliette, TK and then court and how are things going to go…" She paused and shook her head. "I have so much to do. I still have patients to see and work to do…so do you." She motioned to him. "I mean, it's not like we can stop living…stop moving forward or anything."

He shook his head. "No…no we can't, so we need to figure it out Dani. We need to put it together, pull it together and put one foot in front of the other and go forward. Isn't that what you would tell your clients?"

She nodded and bit her lip. "I'm not my client Nico."

He smiled. "No, you're not." He leaned closer and smiled wickedly at her. "But you did agree to something special last night. You belong to me now Danielle, or you will very soon." His voice was full of promise.

She shivered and nodded. "Oh wow…I guess…"

"So, you let me worry about those things. The rest of them will figure themselves out anyway baby. You do your job, I do mine and we do what we need to for the kids."

Her eyes were wide and her mouth went wide. "Okay."

He leaned in and kissed her forehead. "Good, now I'm going to make some French toast and bacon and you're going to help." He stood, pulled her from the stool and slapped her playfully on the ass. "So, I'm going to need a few things from the fridge, you grab those while I slice that bread."

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Lindsay sat in her bed. She hadn't slept well. She wiped the tears from her face with her sleeve and pulled the coat up under her chin. She sniffed quietly and watched Juliette resettle in her sleep. She sighed and moved carefully from her bed. She didn't want to bother the other girl. She didn't want to bother anyone. She wanted to feel safe and normal and she really wished she did. She thought she would here. She figured being home would have made it better. Being in her own bed would have made the nightmares fade, or at least made them less real, but she was wrong.

She reached for her crutches and sat on the bed trying to decide if she should take the coat or not. She wanted it, the familiar scent, but it was heavy and bulky. She wasn't sure she wanted to drag it down the steps. She hated that the thought of leaving it brought another round of frustrated tears to her eyes. She closed them and sighed.

"Hang on Linds…I'll be right back." Juliette mumbled and then the girl slipped from the bed and was out door.

Lindsay hadn't even realized she was awake and she wasn't really embarrassed, but she hurried and wiped her eyes. She'd been up talking with Juliette for a couple hours before they'd both fallen asleep. Juliette had cried with her last night, she'd held her some and listened while she unloaded about what had really happened and Juliette knew about the coat and what it meant. She glanced up as Juliette slid back into her room.

The other girl was holding a hooded sweatshirt. "He was out running with Ray Jay this morning." She smiled. "You were actually asleep then, but they woke me up coming back in." She rolled her eyes. "You're brother's loud when he takes a piss, you know that? Anyway, this is Nico's." She held it up and inhaled. "No bad sweaty smell I promise, but it smells like him. Think it'll work?" She held it out and waited for Lindsay to take it.

She took it and sniffed along the collar and hood. She was right, it had the same scent and even a bit of her mom's scent too. She smiled and nodded as she set the crutches down and pulled it over her head. It was huge, but she shoved the sleeves up and the way the hood sat around her neck enveloped her head in his scent. She felt warm and she could move easy with the crutches. "You don't think he'll mind do you?"

She snorted and shook her head. "I steal his sweatshirts all the time. We'll just blame me and he'll get it anyway." She flopped onto the bed and sniffed. "I smell bacon and coffee. I'm gonna gain a million pounds living here, even if it is just on the weekends." She smiled wide and looked at Lindsay, then she frowned. "I know you had a bad night."

Lindsay shrugged. "Not your fault. I thought it would be better at home, but it's just as bad. I still see them, feel them…hear em." She closed her eyes against the memories. "I hate that I let it hurt me so much. I don't want it to make me feel bad. And when everyone is around and I'm busy I can block it out, but at night when it's just me and my thoughts..." her voice trailed off and she started crying. She couldn't stop the tears. The pain just crept up on her and overwhelmed her so suddenly. "I can't make it…stop…"

The older girl sat up and pulled her into her arms. "It's okay." She rocked her and held her. "You're allowed to feel that way." She ground her teeth and pushed her own pain and ache away. Lindsay's pain tore at her heart and made her hurt. The hurt made her want to make it go away. She knew how to make it go away and she wanted her drugs back. She was craving them hard right now. She bit the inside of her cheek and tasted blood. "Let's go downstairs." She needed her medication, she needed some caffeine and she needed some accountability. She also thought Lindsay needed some mom time.

"Okay." Lindsay nodded against Juliette's shoulder. "Thanks though…for being here." She hugged the other girl. "I know it's hard for you too."

Juliette stood suddenly. "Come on gimpy." She picked up the crutches. "Let's get moving."

She took the crutches and gave Juliette an odd look as she stood. "You okay?"

"Yup, just need some caffeine." She rubbed her arms, trying really hard not to scratch which was what she wanted to do. She grabbed a sweater and pulled it on. "So, let's go down." She moved ahead of Lindsay and almost ran down the steps before catching herself midway and waiting on the girl. She counted silently in her head and closed her eyes. She told herself what she needed was to slow down. She wasn't dying and there weren't drugs to be had anyway.

She inhaled and exhaled slowly and then when Lindsay was beside her she moved down the rest of the stairs with her. "Sorry about that…" She said, glancing beside her as they hit the foyer."

"For what?" Lindsay looked at her and waited for the explanation before moving. She was confused by the girl's change in demeanor from one second to the next.

"Upstairs just now…" She glanced down and shrugged. "You made me feel some things and it hit me hard. The feelings…" She exhaled and blew hair off her forehead and out of her eyes. "Hell, this talking about my feeling shit is hard, but when I feel the pain, the stuff like you went through makes me remember why I started with the drugs. I want to dull the pain again. It makes me want to use. It hit me hard. I'm having a hard time right now." She said it in a big rush and when she got it out she realized something. She felt better. She smiled some.

"I'm sorry, I'm not trying to make it harder on you." Lindsay looked at the floor. "Talking to you helps me, I know you know how it feels." She shrugged. "I'll stop if it hurts you too much…makes it harder."

Juliette shook her head. "No, don't." She touched Lindsay's shoulder. "I just told you something that I hadn't said to anyone else and I feel better…lighter." She pulled Lindsay into a quick hug. "It's still there, the pain and I want to use, but like the overwhelming need; it's kinda gone. That's never happened before." She cocked her head to the side. "Corinne said that could happen and I told her it was bullshit." She giggled. "Now I have to eat my words."

"I smell bacon and pancakes, so maybe we can eat those instead?" Lindsay laughed and pulled Juliette toward the kitchen.

Juliette shook her head as they entered the kitchen. "No, it's French toast, but I need coffee first." She looked at the girl beside her. "You?"

"Yes, please."

Nico looked up from the stove. "Morning lovelies, there's bacon too." He winked and noted the sweatshirt. He glanced to Juliette. "I deduce that the acquisition of the more appropriate wardrobe piece for Miss Santino was by your hand?"

She snorted, glanced to Lindsay and rolled her eyes. "Yes Sherlock and I assured her that you would be quite agreeable with the appropriation."

He nodded and chuckled, "Quite on point Watson, quite on point." He turned back to his pan with a flourish of the spatula.

Dani watched the entire exchange unfold with her mouth partially open. She stepped beside him holding a plate, waiting for him to place the toast on it. "What was that about?"

He smiled. "I used to read Sherlock Holmes to her when she was younger, we would act out the parts. Sometimes, when she'd done something ornery I'd pull out the Sherlock voice." He lifted a corner of the toast, checked and then placed it on the plate. "Lindsay's wearing my sweatshirt and since I'm pretty sure I know why she's wearing it, but that she wasn't the one to go get it, I figured I'd call Juliette out on it. I'd just do it playfully."

Dani waited for the second piece of toast and smiled. She kissed his cheek and wondered if she'd ever stop discovering new things about this man. "I love you." She whispered it and moved to set the plate down on the island. She noticed that Lindsay looked tired and she sat beside her. She leaned close as her daughter sipped her coffee.

"Not a good night baby?"

She shook her head and closed her eyes. "I hoped it would be better at home mom, but it's just as hard here." Her voice wavered. "Juliette helped." She snuggled into the neck of the fleece. "The shirt helps." She smiled. "Thanks Nico."

He waved his spatula, but kept his eyes on his pan. "I have plenty more where that came from Linds, besides maybe I can get my coat back." He did turn then and wink at her teasingly.

She giggled at him. "Probably, this is way easier to wear."

"Ah, but it doesn't go nearly as well with my suits." He turned back to his pan and flipped his bread. "And I'm pretty sure no one will take me too seriously in a hoodie, even with the sunglasses."

"Well, that would be a mistake." Ray Jay said from the doorway. "Food smells good and I know you're not eating without me." He grabbed the plate that Nico handed him as he walked past. "Thanks…nice and hot, fresh from the pan." He slid to the fridge and pulled out the orange juice. He sat beside Dani. "So, I get to go out tonight right?"

He poured a glass and then pulled the syrup toward him.

Dani rolled her eyes and watched the kids eat. "Yes, I said you could go out with the new girl tonight."

Nico turned the stove off and removed the rest of the finished toast from the warmed oven. He set it down and then sat across from Dani. He watched as Ray Jay dug in and the girls both picked at their plates. They were both obviously bothered by things on their minds. He wasn't sure what he could do to help them, and he wished there was something. He glanced to Dani.

She shrugged at him and wrapped an arm around Lindsay. "You want to do anything special today?"

She looked at her mother and then back at her plate. "Not really. Carly texted me, she's going to the movies with a couple other people and asked if I wanted to go." She shrugged.

Dani smiled. "Do you want to go Linds?"

"I don't know…what if people ask me things?" She looked up at Dani and then Nico. She looked to Juliette. "What if I freak out or something?"

Juliette reached across the counter. "I could go with you."

Dani's panicked eyes found Nico's. That could be dangerous. What if she left and went to find drugs. Could they trust her?

Nico saw Dani's panic and knew exactly why she was worried.

Lindsay shook her head at Juliette though. "No, you don't have to. I know you don't want to hang with a bunch of high school girls." She took a breath. "Carly and the girls are cool and I know mom you'd be there to get me if I needed you." She looked at Dani again and saw Dani nod. "And Sarah helped me come up with the script and then Greg." She smiled and shook her head. "Well, he's right, I can tell them to shove it if I need to."

"Are you sure?" Dani was nervous for her. "I mean, I'll come get you no matter what, but you did just get home baby."

"And I have school on Monday mom, so I might as well get used to it." She cut a piece of her French toast with her fork and ate it. "I can do this and it will keep me busy, that's the best thing for me. Keeping busy, keeps everything else out of my head."

"Okay then, what time's the movie?"

"I'll have to text her back and see what it is she wants to see." She looked to Juliette. "You can still come if you want to."

Juliette smiled and shook her head. "I'd rather not, unless you really need me there." She glanced at Nico and saw him smile. She knew Nico didn't want her out unsupervised. Hell, she knew she wasn't supposed to be out unsupervised.

Ray Jay shoved another bite into his mouth and then glanced up from his plate. He grabbed his juice, swallowed it all down and then spoke. "Hey, if you guys are going later I could drive." He paused when everyone looked at him. "What?" He took another sip. "I can take Mara to the movies. It's a first date, not like it's gonna be all hot and heavy anyway." He snorted and looked at his sister.

She smiled shyly at him. She bit her lip and looked at her mom as she gripped Juliette's hand. She nodded because she knew if she said anything she'd just cry.

Dani stood up and wrapped her arm around his shoulder. She pressed a kiss to his cheek. "Thank you." She ruffled his hair and then moved to get the coffee pot. She topped up her cup and returned with the pot.

Nico smiled at her. He was proud of the kid and he'd tell him later, right now he was going to finish his food. He watched the girls and lifted his arm when Dani slid against him. He kissed her head and wondered how he ever had a Saturday that wasn't like this. He didn't mind that his food was cold and his puzzle wasn't even partway done. He didn't miss the quiet. Right now, he was happy. He sipped his coffee, and peeled the paper out of maple syrup.

_Later…_

Juliette knew that Saturday was the only day TK would be able to call her. She fiddled with her phone and wondered if he even had the number. She sighed. He didn't have his cell inside, there was no internet access and the only way to make a phone call was to use the phones in the rooms. They were only given an open line for two hours every Saturday. Those hours started at two, which was four minutes ago.

She glanced up as Nico walked past the family room.

He paused and backtracked. "You want to go for a ride?"

She shook her head. "No, I'm cool, but thanks."

His eyebrow rose. "I'm planning on getting some gelato when I'm through with my errands."

She bit her lip, glanced at her phone and then shook her head again. "No, really, I'll stay here."

He frowned, but he didn't say anything else. "See you later then." He waved and headed out the door.

She waved and turned the page in the magazine she really wasn't reading. She paged through and started reading an article titled, _The Top 25 Ways to Please Your Man in Bed_. She rolled her eyes on the first two. Number one was; Clean up your act. It was about grooming. The second was; Get down and dirty and it was about how to talk dirty. Juliette snorted and turned the page with a dramatic, "OMG," when number three was; Work it out.

"More like, throw it out." She laughed and turned the page to find a better article. It was then that her phone rang. She couldn't immediately find her phone. It had somehow slid onto the chair, under the throw. She felt for it, dug for it and finally she pulled it out and accepted.

"Hey." She answered, hoping she got it before it went to her voicemail. The number was one she didn't recognize, but it was from the city. She was hoping it was from the rehab center. Having never received a call from there, she wasn't sure.

There was a pause and then a smooth, cocky voice hit her ear. "Blondie, hey, what's up?"

She smiled and felt her skin heat. "Nothing," she tossed the throw from her legs and stood. She headed up the stairs to her room. Dani was in her office and Nico had just left, so she'd be alone upstairs with Lindsay and Ray Jay out. "What are you up to?"

She could hear the smile in his voice. "Like you don't know the phones just got opened up?"

She shut her door, locked it and dropped onto her bed. "Yeah, like almost ten minutes ago. What the hell were you doing?"

He laughed. "What, you were counting the minutes?" He made a shocked sound. "You desperate Jules? I know I'm all kinds of sexy and all…"

"Haha, so funny and shut up." She couldn't help but smile, he did that do her. "I miss you T."

"I miss you too babygirl." He sighed. "Mmm, missed you really hard last night." He groaned. "You leaving me in the barn that way. Shit, running away that way…that wasn't right."

Her breath caught in her throat and she almost whimpered. She closed her eyes. "I didn't want to leave. You have no idea how hard that was for me." She flopped back onto her pillows. "I really want to be with you TK." Her hand fisted lighted by her hip. "But I need to get out on the weekends and be here. It's helping me…if we get caught Corrine won't let me leave."

"I know, but damn baby. You're gonna kill me."

She chuckled, full throated. "You won't die. I promise you that."

"Yeah, well it damn well feels like someone grabbed ahold of my balls and won't let 'em go." His voice was thick and low in ear; heavy with suggestion. "It's been a long time since someone got to me that way Juliette. A long time." He paused and then added quietly. "You alone?"

"What are you playing at Terrence King?" She smiled and bit her lip.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about, so don't pretend you don't. You out of view of the NCIS."

"NCIS?"

"Nico Careles Investigation Service, come on get with it girl." He laughed. "Well, him, Dr. D and everyone else for that matter."

She giggled. "I'm gonna start calling him NCIS from now on…" She laughed again. "He's not going to like it, but I think I'm gonna do it anyway and yeah, I'm in my room. Dani's in her office. NCIS went to the bank or something and the kids went to the movies."

"Mmm, so you're all alone…mmm, all mine." He took a breath. "What're you wearing baby?"

She smiled and shook her head. "Should we really do this TK?" Even as she said it the hand at her him opened and slid up over her belly. She teased under her t-shirt, but didn't do much else. Her heart rate sped up anyway. Just the thought had her blood warming. She hadn't really done much recently. Hell, everything had pretty much killed her sex drive, but TK had her thinking about it again. She liked that. She actually wanted to feel good. It wasn't just to cover something up or hide pain either. It was because he made her feel something.

"Why shouldn't we do this Jules? You won't let me make love to you and god babygirl, that is what I want to do." He sighed heavily. "Last night I dreamed about how you'd look in my big bed at home and how it would feel to finally get you naked, lay you down and slide inside you. I want to feel you wrapped around me. Fuck…you have no idea what's in my head Juliette…" His voice trailed off.

She gasped, the hand on her belly slid a bit higher and her fingers teased the band of her bra. "Shit…TK…"

"So, what are you wearing Juliette?" He asked, a bit more demanding, but still quiet.

She took a breath. Yoga pants, and a hoodie were not sexy attire, but what did he need to know? "I'm in a pair of hot pink lace panties and a black camisole. How about you TK?" She licked her lips and breathed out. She shifted and sat up to shed the hoodie, which left her in the pants and the cami. She pulled her earphones with mic from the table beside the bed as she did. She was actually wearing those panties, but she left the pants on for now. She resettled on the bed.

"Funny you should ask that…and since I had stable duty after lunch and it's pretty warm out today. I worked up a bit of a sweat. I came back and took a shower, which was why I was a little late calling you." He made a small satisfied sound in the back of his throat. "So right now I'm kicked back on my bed with nothing but a towel wrapped around my hips and have you seen my hips?" The tone of his voice changed suddenly to something more playful as he teased. "They're sharp…I know what you girls like."

Juliette chuckled. She could imagine TK admiring his hipbones and the cut of his stomach and she closed her eyes and brought the sight to mind. She knew what he looked like. He was beautiful. "I know what you look like T…you're fucking sexy, you don't have to convince me." She made a small sound in her throat.

"You like it do you? If you were here would you run your hands under the edge of the towel? Would your sharp little nails drag over my hip bones and just a bit lower?"

She inhaled sharply. "Hell yeah and I'd kiss the center of your chest and then lick lower, let my teeth scrape a little as I did and then pull the towel away so I could see exactly what you're bringing to the party." She smirked.

"Oh, is that how we're gonna play this? Really?" He chuckled. "You ever have a boy from the hood?" He challenged her, but his voice was all tease. "You sure you can handle what I have princess?"

Juliette blinked. She knew he hadn't meant it more than just in response to her playful challenge, but it hit her the wrong way. She knew she'd started the entire thing. She took a breath and tried to play along. "Oh, I've had plenty of _boys_ before TK. You know some of those rappers you listen to? I'm the white girl they're all talking about." It came out a little harsher than she'd meant it to.

"Whoa there, what the hell?"

She heard movement on the other end of the phone, as he shifted position suddenly.

"Calm the hell down Jules and back the fuck off."

Her hands were shaking and she shook her head. "I'm sorry T, shit…I didn't mean that. I don't know what the hell I…no, that's a lie. I do know what I did that for." She took a breath. "It wasn't your fault, but I know what happened."

He made an odd sound. "Well you mind letting me in on it because that was a serious cock block. I mean you just came out of nowhere and intercepted a pass heading straight for me as I stood in the endzone. Then you ran it back for the game ending score."

She imagined the aggravated look on his face. "I'm sorry." She sat up and crossed her legs. "But when you called me princess it hit a nerve and…"

He interrupted her. "I didn't mean anything by that Juliette…I wasn't calling you that because of who you are. I meant it because you really are beautiful with all the blonde hair and fine looks."

She smiled and blushed. "I know Terrence, and I tried to let it go, but it just hit me kinda wrong and then I rolled the wrong way with it." She sighed. "I'm still a little irritable here and there now that I'm off everything and I had a hard night." She shrugged. "I guess, I just…I don't know."

He snorted. "Hey, it's cool…not like I don't over react to shit all the time. At breakfast Carl took the last of the orange juice and I threatened to poison the fish in the dayroom."

She laughed. Everyone knew Carl had a thing for the fish and he was the one who fed and cared for them even if it wasn't his job. "How were you going to do it?"

"Hell, a little window cleaner in the tank would do the job and who's gonna know?" He snorted. "That damn filter annoys the hell out of me anyway all blahhhhnggrhhhghhrrrrnghhhng while you're trying to think or watch TV in there. Fucks with my head and besides, they stink."

She nodded in agreement. "Ugh, they do. Why do you think I always try to avoid that side of the room during group?"

"Same reason I do. The couch is the most comfy, but you get stuck next to the blahhgrhhnging noise and the stink. I'll take the hard chairs any day over that. Right with you babygirl, right with you."

She giggled. "So, no more princess?"

"No, I'll stick with babygirl and blondie and you're cool with Jules too?"

A slow smile spread on her face. She hated it actually, but for some reason when TK called her that it didn't bother her. "Only from you, if anyone else tries to call me that I'll put my spiked heel through their foot."

"Oh yeah, love a girl with some attitude…mmm, so when do I get to find out how much of that shows up between the sheets?"

She threw her head back and laughed. "Is that all you ever think about?"

"I am The King…hear me roar baby…hear me roar." He laughed.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Nico drove toward the city. He had a few things he wanted to grab from his loft and he had an appointment he needed to make before then. It wouldn't take long, and he smiled as he glanced at the folded papers on the seat beside him. He'd already sent the jewelry designer his ideas and today the designer had promised sketches and possibly some computer models. Nico had long planned ahead and he'd known what he wanted even before he'd asked Dani if she'd accept. He hummed along to the music and smiled, lost in his thoughts when the phone rang.

He glanced at the display and frowned, the number was a cell number he didn't recognize. It could be anyone. He accepted.

"Careles."

There was a purr and then, "Nico, nice of you to answer me this time."

His good mood vanished and he considered hanging up, but decided not to, not yet anyway. After all, he was curious about Matt's evening, or if there even was one.

"Gabrielle, what do you need that my lawyer can't handle for you?" His voice was cool.

She chuckled. "Oh Nico, did you really just ask me that? Do you want me to list all those things? Because I'm not sure your lawyers would even understand a quarter of what I would ask for, but you on the other hand…."

"Don't even go there." He frowned and knew he'd walked right into that one. "That's long over between us."

"Oh come on Nico." She purred. "I know exactly what you need…what you like…"

"If you say one more word about it, I will hang up." His voice was quiet and controlled. There was no threat, just a promise. He knew why she was begging and teasing. He'd ended it so many times and eventually, he'd come back to her. He'd been so weak, but not anymore. Dani was everything he needed and so much more. He didn't need Gabrielle anymore…he didn't even want her. "I'm sure there was a reason you called. So, tell me what it was, or stop wasting my time."

She sniffed, indignant. "Mmm, well…first, I wanted to thank you for sending me such a nice little distraction last night." She purred. "He wasn't very durable, so I doubt he'll be back," she made a disdainful sound in her throat. "Typical for a pretty boy, but he was fun while he lasted."

Nico couldn't help but smile. He'd warned Matt. He warned him as much as he could to stay away from Gabrielle. Of course, he'd also sent him to her knowing exactly what would happen. He couldn't help the small chortle that bubbled out as he spoke. "So, did he get his answers then?"

"Oh Nico, you can be a naughty boy." She said in a very disapproving tone. "Such a shame you never let me fix that flaw for you."

He knew she was licking her lips at the thought. He frowned. "Enough Gabrielle, what do you want?"

She sighed. "I really wanted to know why you sent him to me? Why not just tell him the truth?"

"He wouldn't listen to me. He was accusing me of things and didn't want to know the truth about his ex." He stopped, checked traffic and turned.

She chuckled. "Oh that is so rich. You corrupted the good doctor then? I love it." She was quiet for a few seconds. "Or maybe she was corrupted and he bored her?"

Nico didn't deny or confirm anything and he could hear Gabrielle's nails clicking against the phone or the table. "Was there another reason you called?" He wanted her off his phone.

"Actually, yes." She took a breath. "I received a threat via email two days ago, basic blackmail about releasing a video that Juliette is in. I assume you know something about this?"

He wasn't surprised. "I didn't know about the blackmail, but I do know about the video." He sighed. "Why did you wait two days Gabrielle? The sooner we track down the IP address the better."

She snorted. "I have my people on it Nico, but this video seems to be an issue. We can't seem to locate it and if we do track something down it disappears as fast as we find it, along with the people connected to it."

Nico laughed then. "Stop then. I'm the one shutting down the sites. You're chasing me, chase them."

She cursed under her breath. "Why doesn't that surprise me and how long has this thing been public?"

He wiped a hand over his face. "I don't know. Even Juliette doesn't know since she was high when it was made. We have the assholes who made it in jail. The problem is the copies just keep getting dumped onto servers. It's out there and as fast as we yank a copy down someone else uploads a new one."

"So, my daughter is forever out there in some porn movie?" She sounded disgusted.

"Unfortunately, yes." Nico knew it was true. There was no way to stop it. They would simply be slowing the spread, constantly taking a copy down. Somewhere down the road it would show up on TMZ. If what Gabrielle said was true, probably very, very soon. "If this guy has a copy on his hard drive, he's going to reveal it whether you pay him or not."

She sighed. "I know. I'll pay and then he'll sell the copy anyway."

She sounded like a mother and Nico felt sorry for her. "I'm sorry, Gabby. I really am trying to keep the damage down, but I think this one's going to bite us in the ass." He'd already talked to the PR people and they were working on the best way to spin things if it came out. This would require a new phone call. Juliette's addiction and the fact that the video was done by the assholes who were now in jail for making these same videos, well that was all going to help her cause. "There are things on our side. She's recovering from her addiction. These jackasses were arrested for making these videos illegally and even if she was of age, it's going to help her out. I have people working on a plan Gabrielle."

"You sound like Marshall." She chuckled. "You two really are so much alike." She sounded sad. "I miss him…I miss you Nico, so much." Her voice caught.

He shook his head and refused to let her get to him. She knew how to play him, and he wondered if that's what she was doing or if the emotion was genuine. "Juliette is like a daughter to me and she always has been. I'll do everything in my power to keep her safe." He ignored the implication of her statement. "I'll keep you posted on everything else. Send the email to my work email and everything else you have as well. You might have something we don't."

"You're such an ass sometimes." She sounded disgusted with him. "Fine, yes save Juliette…all about Juliette with you…"

And he had his answer. "I'm hanging up now. Send me the information." He ended the call. "Motherfucking bitch…" He growled. He hit the Bluetooth button on his phone. "Dial AJ." The phone dialed and rang.

"Yeah?" AJ answered.

"We have another wrinkle."

"When don't we?" The other man sighed. "What is it this time?"

"Gabrielle got an email threat of blackmail. Pay or the video goes public."

AJ laughed. "Does she know whoever's just going to take the money and then turn over the video anyway?"

"Yeah, she realizes." He turned into the parking garage and took a ticket. He turned toward the upper levels. "She's supposed to be sending me the emails and the info she has, but…" He left his sentence trail off.

"But you want me to try and get into her computer and pull it out on my own. I hear you." He sighed. "We haven't found any new activity, but we're still at it. I'll work on Ms. Pittman's computers. How's the kid doing?"

Nico smiled. "Pretty good, she's strong and hanging in there."

"Good, glad to hear it. Wish I was doing more."

"You're doing plenty AJ and I appreciate all of it." He pulled into a parking space, but didn't turn the car off. "Everything you've done has helped."

"I hope it's enough."

"It's gonna be. Just keep me posted and as soon as Gabrielle sends me anything, I'll send it your way."

"Okay, I'll keep my eyes open. Talk to you later then boss."

"Thanks AJ, see you." He disconnected and turned off the ignition.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Ray Jay watched Lindsay. He could tell she was nervous, but she was also smiling as she talked to Carly. She was on his left and Mara was on his right and then the aisle. The lights were still up and they were chatting as they waited for the previews to start.

His date leaned over to him and whispered in his ear. "We could move toward the back." She wrapped her arm around his upper one and pressed a quick kiss along his jaw.

Ray Jay pulled his head back with a smile and looked at her. He shook his head as the lights went down. "Here's good," He gripped her hand and bent his head close as the sound went up. "I promised my mom I'd keep an eye on her because her foot's all fucked up and stuff." Everyone in school knew about Lindsay's attack, granted not all the details, but that she'd been kidnapped. Mara was new, he didn't know her well and he hadn't expected much more than just hanging out really, but when had he ever turned down a hot make out session and possibly more? He sighed as he heard Nico's voice in his head.

He looked over at his sister again. She'd tensed up as the lights went down and now she was leaning toward him. He frowned and straightened. He reached for Lindsay's hand and leaned her direction as the previews started. He whispered. "You good?"

She looked at him as she gripped his hand. "Yeah, I mean I think so." She nodded to convince herself really and smiled. "I'm gonna be."

He gave her a harder look as the lights from the screen flashed across her face and he tried to read her expression. He wasn't great at that, he'd admit, but she wasn't freaking out and he watched as she snuggled into the sweatshirt she was wearing. He had to admit, it was an improvement over the big wool coat she'd been dragging around. He left his hand on the arm rest and then his attention shifted to the screen as the preview for some horror flick started and it was something he wanted to see. He smiled when Mara ooh-ed and ahh-ed beside him and leaned closer.

"I love horror movies." She mumbled against his shoulder as she pulled her leg under her and settled as close as humanly possible to him despite the arm rest.

He nodded, eyes on the screen. "Hell, me too, love em." His smiled widened and he only wished the preview were longer, though horror was not what Lindsay should be seeing which was why they were watching some stupid comedy. He picked up his Coke and drank as Mara's fingers started playing in his hair. He looked over at her and smiled but shook his head. "You know the movie hasn't even started yet?"

She giggled. "But you're so damn cute." She pulled his head toward her and then frowned when he resisted. "Come one, what the hell? I figured you'd be up for some fun, even if you did have to bring the girl squad along. First date, fine get we might not get too riled up, but I was thinking we'd at least be making out." She pouted at him.

He leaned away some. "Mara, really I want to and you're so damn hot, but Lindsay just got home and she's hurt pretty bad. I brought her out to help her feel better, not because I had to but because I wanted to."

The girl sighed and sat back in her seat, crossed her arms and pouted. She looked over at him. "I heard you were kind of a bad boy Ray. You know, arrested, drugs, fights and that kind of thing. I didn't think you were all knight in shining armor in love with your own sister."

Ray Jay turned and looked at the girl beside him. He glared at her. "You know what Mara? This date is officially over. I'll take you home after the movie, but that's it. Do you get that? And for the record, I'm pretty damn popular and have plenty of pull in the school, you're the new girl, you do know that right? I have plenty of friends and I'm going to be sure they know how you really are. There won't be anyone who is going to want to date you. I hope you're interested in the guys in the AV and Chess Clubs because that's all you're going to find when it comes time for prom, well you might luck out with one of your drug user types…"

She stared at him. "You can't mean that?

He smiled and sat back. "Yeah, I think I actually do mean it. My sister is a big deal to me, because family is a big deal to me and we stick together. It's how we survive."

She stared, shook her head and then reached for her purse. "I'm going to shop. And you don't have to worry about giving me a ride. I'll find my own way home, asshole." She huffed and then she was gone.

He shook his head, picked up his soda and settled into his seat.

Lindsay leaned against his arm. "What the hell's going on?"

He shook his head. "Don't worry about it, she decided to leave."

She frowned. "Because of me?"

He leaned close to her ear. "No Linds, because she's a selfish wench, it has nothing to do with you trust me. This is all on her and I don't want anything to do with her if she's gonna act that way."

"Thank you." She squeezed her brother's arm.

He shook his head. "I didn't do anything and shh, movie's starting." He smiled and shrugged. He figured he should be disappointed that his date left, but he wasn't. He was angry at her for being a bitch. He was also surprised that he felt good inside. Good that he was there for his sister. He held out the popcorn to her and she took some with a smile.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Dani sat in her office and worked through some notes on her computer, but she kept getting distracted. She was worried about Lindsay and Juliette and how things were going to go for her own future. She was so lost in her thoughts that she jumped when her phone rang.

She scolded herself mentally and laughed when she picked up the phone. Then she laughed when she saw it was Jeanette. She answered.

"Jeanette, I have so much to tell you. Oh my god, but first is anything wrong?"

"Dani, why do you always assume that? No woman, there isn't anything wrong. Unless me getting fat is something wrong." She laughed. "You better start telling me what you have to say then. This bambino makes me have to pee so much I barely make it a half hour."

Dani laughed. "Woman the things I have to say could take two lifetimes." She frowned and was surprised by the tears that she wiped away. "Oh honey I miss you so much and I wish you were here." She sniffed.

"Baby, what's wrong and don't tell me nothing because I hear it in your voice. You know, like when Bobby Venucci said you were fat and ugly in seventh grade. You told me nothing then, but you were lying. So, don't even try to lie to me."

She gasped. "I don't even believe you remember that." She shook her head. "I totally forgot that toad."

"That's great Dani, but don't be changing the subject. What's wrong, did Mr. Mysterious break your heart?"

"Jeanette, if only that was my problem…" She sighed and settled back into the couch. "I don't even know where to start. I mean, it's insane and the only thing that really has been good through everything is Nico. God, Jeanette he's incredible."

"Ohhh, you're in love with him aren't you?"

She couldn't help but smile. "Yes, so much and right now he's my rock." She wiped at her eyes. "Jeanette, my baby…oh god, she was kidnapped and they hurt her so badly."

"What are you talking about Dani? Someone hurt Lindsay?"

"Yes, the men who Ray Jay pissed off kidnapped Lindsay to get back at him and they sexually assaulted her." She forced the words out in a rush. "She got away before they raped her, but she's hurt and she's trying to feel safe again."

"Oh my god Dani…if I could be there…"

She shook her head. "I know you'd be here and it's okay. It's just been crazy…and Nico's best friend died. His god-daughter is on drugs and now in rehab." She paused to sob and wipe her eyes again. "The guys who hurt Lindsay also hurt her and on top of everything else there are videos of them hurting both of the girls out there Jeanette…on the web. My baby's out there on the web with these guys hurting her."

"Oh honey, I'm so sorry…I want to help. What can I do?"

"There isn't anything you can do. I appreciate you asking though."

"Why don't you start at the beginning and tell me what happened." Jeanette made a sound. "I may have to interrupt you or carry you to the bathroom with me, but you tell me what you need to tell me Dani and start where you want."

Dani took a deep breath and did just that.

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

_Two weeks later…_

Dani stood in the kitchen and leaned against the counter. She was waiting for the kids and re-reading the certified letter from the DA. The District Attorney had arrived with it himself and had been there for an hour talking with her. She'd been upset, but was calmer now. There wasn't much she could do and she hoped when she told Lindsay that she would understand as well.

She knew Nico would be home soon and hoped it was quickly. She was expecting him and Juliette since it was a Friday. She reread the letter again, and almost jumped when the front door opened. She looked up to see Juliette come through the door with a duffle bag of laundry. She smiled at the girl and set the letter on the counter. She headed to the front door. She hugged Juliette as the girl headed toward the laundry room.

"Hey, how are you doing?" Dani asked as Juliette headed in.

Juliette smiled. "Not bad…good actually." She readjusted the bag on her shoulder. "Lindsay home yet?"

"Not yet, she should be home soon."

"Cool, I'm going to go start my clothes."

Dani nodded and slid to the door. She leaned against the door frame and watched as Nico talked on his phone and leaned against his car. She saw him smile when he saw her and she smiled back. She pulled the door closed behind her and waited. The weather was getting brisk and she pulled her sweater tighter against her.

It was a few minutes before he finished his call. He hung up, lifted his bag from the ground and then moved toward Dani. "Hey, how have you been baby?" He pulled her into his arms and pressed a soft kiss against her lips.

She snuggled against him. "Okay, was your trip good?" He'd been gone for the past five days and she'd missed him. "I do have something to tell you though." She added seriously.

He frowned. "Well, except for missing you, it was fine…that and you know smelly football players." He pulled her against his side and turned them toward the door. "Are the kids okay?"

"They're good. Lindsay's getting along pretty good now. She was allowed to just wear the boot today. She was thrilled to go without the crutches finally." She smiled as she opened the door. "Tonight the chaplain's coming over for dinner. I hope that's okay?" Dani had already asked Greg to dinner and she didn't want to cancel now. Besides, he seemed to have a way with Lindsay.

He sighed in relief, figuring that's what she had to tell him. He smiled as he set his bag by the stairs. "I like him because you and Lindsay like him, but he's strange." He pulled a face. "What are we eating for this chaplain dinner?"

"Roasted pork loin and everything that goes with it." She opened the door. "I made tiramisu for dessert."

He growled against her ear as he bent over her. "Can't we just skip to dessert then? I love your tiramisu." He kissed down her neck as his hands pulled her close. "Of course we could skip dinner altogether…" He pressed his hips against her belly to press his point as he nipped his way back up her neck. "Call the chaplain, reschedule for tomorrow…mmm." His lips found hers again and he stepped forward forcing her back to the wall as his tongue slid between her lips and found hers.

Dani gasped in surprise. She hadn't expected this after telling him she wanted to talk and her hands slid up his chest to his shoulders as she struggled to think. Her thoughts were washed away in a rush of lust as his tongue took over her mouth and his thigh pressed between her legs. She moaned softly and gripped his shoulders to steady herself even as the wall held her up. She was never prepared for what he did to her and she wondered if she ever would be. Her eyes were closed and she was lost in sensation when suddenly his lips were gone.

She stood panting and slowly opened her eyes to find he'd stepped back, but was still holding her by the shoulders and he was smiling at her. She blinked to clear her fuzzy vision and then licked her lips. She tasted him. He'd eaten chocolate and drank coffee recently, but he tasted like Nico underneath. She cleared her throat. "What?" Her voice was thick and husky in her ears.

He pushed a piece of hair from her forehead and shook his head. "Nothing, I just like to see you lost like that baby." He leaned against her again and kissed her forehead. "When is dinner?" The question was innocent, but the words hung heavy between them with suggestion.

She smiled. "I told Greg to be here at six thirty."

He checked his watch. "It's only two fifteen."

She nodded slowly. "And I'm sure you're tired and would like to shower and nap before dinner." She kept her eyes on his face as she spoke.

His eyebrow rose. "I might. The kids will be home in what, ten minutes? I should say hi first."

She pouted, but nodded. "Probably, Lindsay's been dying to see you."

He leaned in again and kissed her quickly. "It's a date then." He smiled and slid his arm around her waist. "I could use a glass of something cold."

Dani snuggled against him. "There's tea and lemonade."

"Either one will do. Tell me about your week, anything going on I should know about?"

Dani frowned as the letter suddenly popped back into her head. "Actually yes, like I said, I had something I needed to tell you." She pulled away from his side and hurried ahead of him. She picked the letter up from the counter and handed it to him. After he took it, she moved to the fridge and took out the tea and lemon slices. She fixed him a glass of tea and slid it across the counter as he read the two page letter. She watched his face as he sat on the stool and absently pulled the glass to him, sipped and continued reading.

When he was done, he set the letter down, took a long drink and then looked at Dani. "I thought you were just talking about Greg coming for dinner."

She shook her head and crossed her arms. "Why would I be serious about that?"

He shrugged. "I don't know, because I don't really like the guy?" He sipped his tea. "Anyway, does Lindsay know about this yet?"

She shook her head. "The DA was just here about two hours ago. He brought that and told me. They're having a press conference about now. It will be all over the news in about ten minutes."

He slid his hand across the counter and squeezed Dani's. "How are you doing?"

Her eyes were slightly panicked and wide and she gripped his hand. "I'm pissed, but I guess I'm relieved. I mean I'm really not sure how something like this happens, but it means at least those two can't hurt anyone else again."

He nodded. "And Lindsay won't have to testify." He watched Dani's face. He knew she wanted them to face justice, but now that they were both dead. "Obviously they'd made a pact to kill themselves and they somehow managed to follow through with it." He motioned to the letter. "Their father tried, but didn't succeed, but he wasn't involved with Lindsay as far as we know, so she wasn't going to testify in his case anyway." He wasn't exactly sure how he felt. There was anger that they wouldn't get what they deserved and yet he wouldn't deny he was relieved.

Dani fiddled with the edge of the letter. She just let the paper play under her fingers. "I know. Mr. Harris, the DA told me that he was probably not going to wake up. They think he's brain dead, but they aren't sure right now."

"Damn, weren't these kids on suicide watch or something?" He cursed under his breath. He was frustrated because they never would be held responsible now. "What about Ken Ellis? What about the case against him? Did Harris say anything about him?"

She nodded slowly, her eyes on the counter. "He confessed and he isn't changing anything. He made a deal with the DA that we didn't know about. He's going to do three to five. Harris says that Lindsay won't have to testify at all."

"Motherfucker." His hand fisted at his side and his grip tightened on Dani's. He only released her hand when she made a sound. "Sorry…that wasn't supposed to happen. There wasn't supposed to be a deal. He was supposed to testify and admit everything."

She winced as she shook out her hand. "I don't know anything about the deal, but let it go. Lindsay won't have to testify, so we have that."

There was commotion at the front door and Ray Jay was laughing as he rushed inside. "Linds, shut up…I told you that Kev isn't dating Amy. Trust me on this." He waited until his sister was inside and shut the door. He was carrying her backpack and his. He rolled his eyes when she shoved him. "I'd shove you back if you weren't still all gimpy. You're just lucky you are." He carried their bags to the kitchen and dumped them on a chair.

"Come on tell me who's he's dating then. Rachel? Bren? That chick with the blue and red streaks in her hair?" Lindsey was walking backward awkwardly as she peppered her brother with names. "His Facebook status is now 'In a relationship' so he's with someone and you know who it is. So, come on spill. He hasn't ever dated before, this is big news. He's the only friend you have left who's never been kissed."

Ray Jay nodded. "Hey Nico, will you tell my sister to lay off. Some people need privacy."

He shook his head and cleared his expression. He smiled. "If Kev wanted privacy he should never have posted anything on Facebook." He pulled the kid into a quick hug. "You been good?" He released him and then moved to Lindsay.

Ray Jay nodded and slid to the fridge. "Hell yeah, we're good. Missed you around here, but good." He found the lemonade.

"Lindsay, no crutches I like the progress." He smiled and waited for her to hug him. He didn't have to wait long. She pressed against him.

"Yep, I'm still pretty hop-a-long like, but a lot less mechanical. I'm glad you're home old man. You bring my long lost sister with you?" She squeezed him and then released to look up at him.

He nodded and kissed the top of her head. "She brought home a bunch of laundry, something about their machines being down and her needing to do a bunch. I think she carried home TK's too." He rolled his eyes because the thought of Juliette Pittman doing laundry was almost too much. He caught Dani's eyes over Lindsay's head.

Dani cleared her throat. "Hey, we need to talk about something. All of us, even Juliette."

Nico stepped back. "I'll get her." He moved toward the laundry room. "Hey, Juliette." He found her in the laundry room sorting clothes into two piles. "You know I was sure I'd die before I saw you this domestic." He leaned against the doorway. He lifted his chin toward the clothes skeptically. "I do hope you plan on doing more sorting than just his and hers."

She snorted at him and paused with a few items of clothes in her hands. "Do you have to be such a smart ass?"

He laughed as he eyed what was in her hands. "Now that's hilarious Juliette."

She looked at what she was holding. It was a pair of lace panties and a pair of boxer briefs. "Oh god." She turned three shades of red and tossed the underwear into their piles. "Did you want something else?" She put her hands on her hips and glared at him."

"Yes, we need to talk to you about something important. Something about the court case." He was suddenly serious. He motioned with his head toward the kitchen. "Dani and the kids are waiting."

Her eyes suddenly pulled together and she focused hard on his face. "Please don't tell me they're letting those bastards go." She stepped over the clothes and took Nico's hand. "It'll kill Lindsay…hell it'll kill me."

He shook his head and led her into the kitchen. "It's not that."

They found the kids and Dani at the table.

Juliette sat beside Lindsay and Nico sat beside Dani which left Ray Jay at the end of the table.

Dani held the letter in her hand and she looked across the table at her daughter and then Juliette. She then looked down the table at her son. She took a breath. "The District Attorney came to see me today and he had some information about the Harpers."

Nico watched Lindsay's face. He saw her go pale, her eyes close and her swallow. His eyes moved to Ray Jay and Juliette and he saw them watching her too. He took Dani's hand under the table and felt her cling to it. He clung back.

Dani pushed the letter into the center of the table. "What Mr. Harris had to say was that all three of the Harpers that were in custody; both boys and their father all attempted suicide last night or early this morning." She paused.

There was a collective gasp at the table and all eyes were on Dani.

She reached for Lindsay's hand and her daughter took it. She searched her face. "The boys succeeded. Tyler died last night and Mason was pronounced dead earlier this morning. Their father, last I heard was still in a coma and isn't expected to ever regain consciousness."

"Oh my god, oh my god…" Lindsay started crying and breathing heavy. "I don't know what this means…" She looked from her mother to Nico and then to Juliette and her brother.

Dani stood and wrapped her arms around her. "I know it's all screwed up baby and I know it's confusing." She hugged her and kissed her cheek. "The good thing is you won't have to testify and no matter what they'll never hurt anyone again."

Lindsay looked up at her mom and blinked back her tears. "I wanted to see them pay for what they did. They're getting off too easy. How does this make them pay for how they hurt me and Juliette…and all those other girls? It's not fair."

Dani shook her head. "Oh baby it doesn't. You're right, it's not fair."

Ray Jay sat at the end of the table with his arms crossed. He stared down the table. His jaw was clenched and his face was a mask of quiet anger.

Nico noticed. "Ray Jay, are you okay?"

He shook his head as his eyes found the older man's face. "Not at all. We should have hurt them when we could."

Nico knew how the kid felt. He looked at Juliette. "How about you Juliette?"

She shrugged and slumped in her chair. "I don't know? Doesn't really matter I guess. I mean they aren't going to hurt anyone. I like that. They're gone and they can't pass on their bad genes or ideas to anyone else. I like that." She sat up and leaned into Lindsay. Her arm went around the other girl. "It's okay Linds, they can't hurt us anymore."

Lindsay looked up at her mom who was behind her. "What about Lewis?"

Nico shifted to look at Dani. "Did Harris mention how his case was going?"

Dani nodded. "Yeah, his and the Ellis case, both are clear cut. They both are based on confessions and neither are changing their stories. Lewis submitted no contest, not exactly guilty, but he's not fighting the charges so there's the DA says there's no need to testify. Your statement will be enough."

She nodded, bit her lip and wrapped her arms around herself. "Okay…so did they announce this yet?"

Nico answered. "No, but they're going to soon. They're probably holding a press conference now. Your name is still not connected as far as we know, but that might change."

Lindsay was quiet for a few long seconds and then she took an even longer breath. "Well…."

Dani stood and brushed her daughter's hair from her face. "Linds, you're strong and while I think you could have testified, I have to say I'm glad you didn't have to." She smiled at her. "You do remember that Chaplain Greg is coming over for dinner tonight, right?"

"Oh hell, that's tonight?" She shook her head and wiped her eyes. "I'm kind of glad….maybe he can help me figure things out some?"

Nico wanted to roll his eyes. He was pretty sure the girl had shit figured out pretty damn well, but whatever made her happy.

Ray Jay stood abruptly from the table. "I'm going to my room for a while." He mumbled and then he was gone.

Dani frowned, but let him go.

Juliette nudged Lindsay. "How about helping me with my laundry?"

Lindsay nodded a little stiffly, but she stood when Juliette did. "Did you really bring TK's dirty drawers home?" She tried for humor, but it came off a bit painful.

The other girl snorted. "Those and his sweaty t-shirts and jeans, along with his sweatshirts; it was that or deal with him smelling. I can't believe the laundry facilities died."

The girls were chatting as they walked slowly back to the utility room.

Nico turned to look up at Dani from his chair. He took her hand and pulled her down onto his lap. "Hey, you okay?"

She wrapped her arms around him. "Tell me everything will be?"

"Everything's going to be fine baby. I promise." He hugged her. "How about a shower and a nap?" He added the last bit suggestively. "Problems are always better after a hot shower and a nap."

Dani smiled. "I bet…"

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

_Later the same evening…_

Dani was in the kitchen with the girls were helping her finish dinner. Nico had offered to help, but Dani had shooed him out, so he headed up the stairs to find Ray Jay. He knocked on his door.

"What?"

Nico pushed open the door and leaned against the door frame. "You okay?" He surveyed the sullen look on Ray Jay's face.

The kid looked up from his desk with a shrug, but he didn't really answer.

"Mind if I come in?"

"Suit yourself." He waved his hand.

Nico's eyebrow rose and he sat on the edge of bed. "I know this isn't easy on you and your feelings are pretty much being ignored. I know it's hard."

The kid typed something on the computer and snorted before turning to look at the older man. "That's not all of it. I mean, it is part of it though." He sighed, frustrated. "What they did makes me so angry, I just don't like the way it hurt everyone and then they get out of it so easy? It just doesn't seem fair, and yeah, I know life isn't fair…blah, blah, blah…I totally know all that bullshit, but that doesn't make it any better does it?"

"No, it doesn't kid and I'm with you. I want to pound my fists on the floor and scream at the sky and demand that it be made right since it had to happen, but we got fucked over again." He sighed. "The Ellis kid and Lewis are still standing trial. They're going down. I have AJ working on the internet end of things. It's possible we could get a break there."

He nodded, but didn't look convinced as he looked at Nico. "I know and that's all great, but those aren't the assholes who hurt her."

He saw the pain in the kid's eyes. "Tell you what. I promised you before that we'd go to my gym and we haven't, so tomorrow instead of running that's what we're gonna do. We're still getting up early, but we're gonna spar. How's that sound?"

Ray Jay paused, cocked his head and then a hesitant smile lifted his lips before lighting his eyes. "I'd like that."

Nico stood with a nod. The kid could use the activity to blow off the steam, hell so could he. "Good, so no complaining when I knock you on your ass." He winked at him.

"Funny old man, funny." He smiled and flipped his computer shut. He was bored with it anyway.

The doorbell rang and both men heard the girls run toward the door.

Nico rolled his eyes. "That would be Greg."

"So, this is the chaplain I keep hearing about then?"

He nodded and motioned to the stairs. "Yep, you'll love him I'm sure." He chuckled.

"I bet."

"Come on."

The boys hit the foyer as the girls hustled Greg into the dining room. Nico could hear Lindsay talking a mile a minute to the poor guy. He nudged Ray Jay. "I doubt we'll have to say a whole lot. I think Lindsay will do most of the talking."

"Excellent." He inhaled and rubbed his stomach. "I hope dinner's ready cause I'm starving." He ducked ahead of the other man even if he wasn't really eager to meet Greg, he figured he'd get it over with.

Nico smiled. The kid was always hungry, but then Nico had worked up a bit of an appetite with Dani earlier and his stomach was growling as he hit the kitchen. He found Greg opening a bottle of wine that he must have brought with him as he listened to Lindsay chatter on to him from one of the counter stools. There were flowers and a small gift bag as well and he smiled. The guy was thoughtful and he was obviously a good guest. He was dressed nicely, but casually in jeans and a button down with a jacket over.

Nico smiled at Dani and then cleared his throat. "Hey how have things been at the hospital?" He moved toward the counter just as Greg freed the cork from the bottle.

Greg smiled, set the corkscrew down and held out his hand. "Oh you know, about as good as ever." He took Nico's hand and looked him in the eye. He held the other man's gaze for a few seconds and raised his eyebrow. "How have you been? Today been okay?"

Nico caught his meaning. The news must have been released, but none of them had watched. They already knew. Nico nodded curtly and then released Greg's hand. "We were notified earlier. It's been…tough, but okay." He said this quietly as Dani and Lindsay took food into the dining room.

He nodded. "I was shocked as hell to hear about that."

"So were we." He picked up the bottle of wine and his eyebrow rose in respect. "Damn, you didn't have to bring this for a Friday night pork roast."

He shrugged. "Long story, but it's been sitting in my house for too long and I promised my wife I'd drink it." He took the cork from the screw and pocketed it. "I have to keep the promise for a reason and celebrating someone leaving the hospital is a good reason. I don't often get to do that." He smiled.

Nico studied the man for a few minutes. His opinion of this man was changing. "There's more to you than meets the eye Chaplain Greg and I'm honored that you chose us to help you keep your promise."

He smiled and put his arm around Nico's shoulders. "Carrie would have liked Lindsay and Dani. I think she would have even liked your suspicious ass, but then Carrie liked everyone." He raised his eyebrow at Nico and after a pause, moved into the dining room.

Nico threw his head back and laughed before following Greg into the dining room.

The table was set and as Nico found his seat Ray Jay was asking Greg about a band he'd never heard of, but obviously it was something Greg was familiar with because the conversation for a minute was on the music and then Dani arrived with the pork and a collective discussion of the food ensued.

Dani cleared her throat as she sat. "Hey," she glared down the table at Ray Jay, "hang on a second. Greg's a guest, the least we can do is let him say grace at the table."

Ray Jay rolled his eyes, but sat back in his chair and looked to the chaplain.

Greg chuckled and looked to Dani, "If you're sure?" When she nodded he bowed his head. "Father, thank you for this time we have together and for this family. I was blessed to meet them and to help them and you brought them to me so that I they could bless me as well. You know people say you move in those mysterious ways and all, well how about you stop doing it with people getting hurt? That's all I'm asking okay? I'd rather bump into cool people at the coffee shop or shows, or how about on the bus or a book store. Think maybe we can do things that way from now on, maybe? Oh and thanks for healing up this strong young woman, Lindsay and for keeping her and her family safe. Keep giving 'em strength because they've been through hell enough already, so, how about you go easy on them for a while. I'm just saying. And, Dani she made some kick ass pig here, so bless it, let it strengthen us to do your will and help us help others. Keep us keeping on. Amen."

He raised his head and smiled. He noticed everyone looking at him. "What?"

Ray Jay laughed. "Amen." He reached for the pork platter and started serving himself. "I want some of the kick ass pig."

Nico snorted. "Amen and Greg what the hell kind of grace was that?"

Lindsay was smiling and listening to Juliette whisper something in her ear.

Greg shrugged. "I talk to God like I would a friend. If he doesn't like it, he can lump it." He took the pork from Ray Jay. "Thanks. He's a big guy with big shoulders and I figure he can handle the bullshit I tell him, right? You should have heard me cursing him out when Carrie was dying. Things were not good between us then."

Dani gasped. "You lost faith in your god?"

He shook his head as he passed the pork and took the next dish. "Hell no. I didn't lose faith, not ever, but I was pissed. I was angrier than I'd ever been. Why did he have to take my Carrie? She was young, beautiful, good. She loved everyone and never hurt anyone. She didn't deserve to die. She didn't deserve to suffer. Why did I have to suffer too?" He looked around the table. "It wasn't fair and it hurt so much, but I always believed he was there. He was in control. He knew what was going on and exactly how it was happening. I just didn't know why."

Juliette shook her head. "But how can you still have faith in something like that? I mean when everything is fucked up like that." She glared when Nico tsked her for cursing. "You're losing the one thing you love and the one thing you believe has the power to change it and fix it isn't helping…how can you still trust that thing? Especially when you know it isn't fair and right?"

"Always one of my favorite questions." He smiled. "Have you ever seen the back of a tapestry?"

Juliette nodded.

"Good. Does it look anything like the finished side?"

She shook her head. "No."

"What does it look like?" He asked with a quiet smile and looked around the quiet table.

"It's a big mess of knots and threads."

"So, anyone looking at the back of a tapestry, assuming that was the only side they ever saw, would surely say that the weaver had no artistic ability and needed to stop doing whatever it was they were doing. Would that be a fair assumption?"

Juliette thought for a second. "I suppose, if that was the only thing you ever saw or were shown, then yeah, I guess you'd think the person couldn't weave."

Greg smiled and nodded. "Well, that's how I view my life. I'm looking at the underside of the tapestry. God is weaving it. I can only see the fits and starts. I only see the parts where he weaves in a new color here and starts a new scene there. I have no idea what the finished product that will be, Greg Campbell's Life, will look like. Only he does. So, losing faith in the artist when he's partway through a project is pretty shitty. I can petition him to change something. Please add more this person, less of this one. I don't like egg salad, so no more of that in the hospital cafeteria. Please keep Carrie around and I'm pissed at hell that you didn't. I like Lindsay Santino and her family, so keep 'em safe and sound so I can hang out with them more often…things like that are fair, but I'm not firing the artist. I'm his finest work." He winked.

"So, he's the big dream weaver in the sky…" Juliette stared at him for a second and then nodded. "Huh, I never thought of it that way."

He chuckled, hummed a few lines of the song and then added. "Good, I like giving people a new perspective, now, how about someone passing me those rolls."

_After dinner…._

Lindsay sat in the living room with Ray Jay, Juliette and Greg. They four of them were discussing if they would rather play a board game, card game or watch a movie. Ray Jay was opposed to a board game and Juliette was opposed to a movie. Greg was abstaining from the vote. He was smiling as he listened to the discussion and sipping from his glass of wine. He had taken off his jacket and rolled up his sleeves.

Ray Jay sat forward and pointed to his arm. "Dude, you have got to be the weirdest pastor I have ever met."

Greg nodded. "I'll take that as a compliment." He smiled and glanced at his arms. "There isn't a thing wrong with ink or drink." He eyed the kid beside him. "Well, for you there is until you're twenty one and then you can drink. The tattoos you can get at eighteen, but don't do it because you think it's cool or to impress someone. Do it because you want it for yourself."

Ray Jay frowned, but nodded. "So, you got all yours for yourself?"

Greg laughed and shook his head. "Hell no, I was young and dumb once too kid." He shoved his sleeve higher and bared his left bicep. "What does that say?"

There was a tattoo banner below a well done sexy demon. Ray Jay smiled. "Nice, but it says, 'Forever Tara'."

Greg nodded. "Yeah and I got that to impress some chick I didn't love and now there it lives…I was going to get it covered up, but Carrie never let me. She said, 'You need to keep it to remind yourself to not make stupid decisions in the future and to remember that in the past you made them.' So, it's still there to remind me and so I can show kids like you, that I was once really stupid."

"How long did you date Tara?" Ray Jay smirked.

The girls were listening to him now and he looked at them when he answered. "Oh, about a week, maybe ten days, but I really wanted in her pants."

Juliette snorted. "Did the ink help?"

He shook his head. "Nope and it cost me about eighty bucks, which was everything I had at the time."

Lindsay smiled and slid the game onto the coffee table. "But you learned your lesson…"

"On ink yes, but not stupid things to impress girls. That one took a little more time." He eyed the game. "So, game and not movie?"

"I'm the injured one. I didn't vote yet and I say game." She pulled the lid from the board game. "You know how to play?"

He nodded. "Yes." He set his glass down on the table beside the loveseat and looked up when Dani and Nico entered the room with dessert and coffee. "Ah, you two playing with us?" He took a plate and a cup of coffee.

Nico eyed the game. He wasn't sure this was one he'd been introduced to yet and he'd been introduced to several during his time with the Santinos. "Only if you take it easy on me since I don't know how to play this one."

Dani laughed. "Oh, this one's easy." She was already dying to see how this turned out since part of the game involved charades. She looked around at the little group of people in her living room. Even with the bad news of the day, everyone was smiling. She felt much better now than she had earlier. She finished handing out the tiramisu and sat down. "Okay, so how are we dividing up these teams?"


	31. Punch Drunk Love

**Punch Drunk Love**

Ray Jay squinted and shook his head to clear it. He heard ringing and he looked up to see Nico's mouth moving, but he couldn't hear what he was saying. He watched the other man undo the velco at his left wrist with his teeth and then tuck the glove under his arm, pull it off and then he kind of lost focus. The next thing he knew Nico was standing over him and he did hear his name, but the ringing was still there only it was in the background now; duller.

"Wha…?" His voice came out mumbled around the mouth guard and he blinked at the mat between his legs. There was a pattern on it. Maybe a dog smiling? He shook his head again and realized it was old sweat spots and blood. He frowned and a wave of dizzy nausea hit him. "Oh…shit…" He leaned forward spitting his mouth guard out as quick as he could as he remembered he'd walked right into Nico's left.

Nico chuckled and lifted the kid gently under the jaw. "Look up, let me see." He removed Ray Jay's headgear and looked at his jaw with a frown. "Shit, your mother's going to kill me." His eyebrow rose. He handed the protective gear off as he took the bag of ice that Lenny, the manager handed him. "Thanks." He pressed the ice to Ray Jay's face and when he tried to pull away he pressed harder. "Stop squirming and sit still. You're gonna bruise and swell up as it is. At least let me limit the damage." He sighed as he stood, still holding the ice to the side of his face. He held out his other hand. "Come on, let's let someone else have the ring."

Ray Jay held out his arm and Nico pulled him up by the forearm. He stood gingerly and then found himself leaning heavily on the other man. "God, I'm dizzy as fuck and if you could turn off the damn bell I'd appreciate it."

Nico chuckled. "The bell's in your head kid, sorry. Next time try not to walk right into my punch." He helped the kid down the small stairs to a bench beside the ring. He picked up Ray Jay's other gloved hand and held it to the ice. "Hold this will you?"

He nodded and pressed the ice to his jaw. "'Kay." He opened and closed his jaw and then blinked his eyes. "I'm still not sure why I didn't see that punch."

Nico shrugged. "You were too busy trying to set me up for your next series. You were trying to draw me in and instead of dropping back, you tried to force it. You weren't looking and on top of all that, you dropped your guard."

"Yeah, to draw you in…"

He snorted. "It doesn't work when you walk right into my fist." He pulled his own head protection off set it on the bench beside them and then started working Ray Jay's gloves off. He looked the kid over. He was starting to look more with it, which was good because Dani was rather protective when it came to her kids and Nico was going to have to deal with her wrath as it was. "You okay; nausea, dizziness, double vision, bad headache? You start doing anything like that I need to know."

Ray Jay pulled the ice from his face so he could get his glove off. He dropped it to the floor by his feet and shook his head slowly. He wasn't really dizzy, his jaw was sore, but it wasn't like he'd never taken a hit in football or wrestling before. Hell, even just messing around with his friends he'd gotten hit pretty good before. He smirked at Nico. "Dude chill out, are you really afraid of mom that much?" Moving his mouth hurt, so he put the ice back to his jaw, but he couldn't help smiling.

"Ray Jay, your mother is a force of nature and she is like a mother bear with her cubs when it comes to you and Lindsay. I just wounded you. I know there's gonna be fall out. I just don't know what that fallout is gonna be." He rolled his head on his shoulders. He had a good bruise on his side from some punches the kid had landed. "I have proof you hit me." He fingered the reddish purple areas along his ribs. "Don't think for one second I'm not using that to defend myself."

"I'm glad you hurt old man, but I hope that eye blacks up a bit too." He pointed to Nico's left eye with a snarky smile. "So, everyone knows I got a good hit or two in…you know since you don't walk around shirtless all the time."

Nico opened and closed the eye and noticed that it was tight. He touched it. "Feels like it might get a nice shiner…you might be in luck kid." He winked and nodded. "How's the jaw?"

Ray Jay shrugged. "Hurts like hell, but I'll survive. I admit, in a real fight, you'd kick my ass."

"Don't you forget it." Nico smiled. "You do have some skills kid, and if you want I can teach you a few things, but let's call it a day, shower and pick up some of those croissants your mom and sister likes. Maybe she won't be so pissed at me for messing up her eldest's face if I present her with some dark chocolate filled pastry."

NRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNR

Dani watched him through the glass of the shower door. Even though through the slightly frosted glass she could see his form, the long line of his back, the tight curve of his ass and the way he leaned against the wall of the shower and let the water wash over him. A jolt of heat ran through her. He took her breath away and she didn't hesitate to pull her nightshirt over her head and quietly open the shower door.

He didn't bother turning at first even though he heard her behind him. He smiled and waited for her to press against him. "Morning." He turned when she was flush against his back and pulled her tight against his lower body, but he leaned back so he could see her face. He shifted so that the water ran over his shoulder and over her breasts. He watched the water sluice over her collarbones and breasts and then his gaze moved to her face. "You didn't have to get up so early, but I do appreciate the view."

She smiled and looped her arms around his neck as she stood up on her toes to pull his head down to hers.

He didn't resist and captured her mouth with his. She must have been up earlier because she tasted like toothpaste when he deepened the kiss. His tongue eased into her mouth and pushed at hers and then pulled back. He teased her lips with his tongue and teeth and as he did he shifted them in the shower so that she was pressed against the wall. He lifted his head and gazed down at her while one hand drifted up her side and teased the curve of her right breast. He watched her eyes darken and her mouth open slightly. Her tongue captured a few drops of water from her lips. His hand moved lazily up her side to her face and he pushed her damp hair from her face.

"Did you sleep well?" He gasped a bit when her nails slid over his chest.

She bit her lip and nodded and watched her fingers move over his chest. "Yes, very well…mmm, god you are so hot." Her hands moved over his sides and she saw him flinch. "Are you hurt?"

He took her hand and shook his head. "No, I'm fine." He slid her into the spray of the shower. "How about you get washed up? I have croissants and the coffee should be done."

She shook her head and reached for his arm. "Don't you change the subject." She shifted and glanced at his side. She saw the discolored area over his ribs and traced it softly with her fingertips. "What the hell happened? That wasn't there last night." She looked up at him, her arms crossed stubbornly over her chest as she squinted up at him. "And your eye's swollen too. What the hell Nico?"

He sighed and pushed his wet hair off his forehead. "Danielle, shower and then come talk to me. I'll discuss it with you in a minute." He shook his head and smiled at her and then he pulled her into his arms and kissed her hard. There was no discussion after the kiss. He simply left her breathless as he exited the shower.

She stood there weak kneed as the door closed behind him. She touched her lips and pressed her thighs together. "Oh fuck…"

He laughed on the other side of the door. "I heard that."

"I hate when you do that to me." She reached for the shampoo.

Nico dried and watched her through the steamy door. "You do not. You just hate that I can do it to you when you don't want me to."

She snorted as she washed her hair. "Same thing." She slid under the water and rinsed her hair. "That's what I meant."

He had his clothes in the bathroom and pulled on his jeans once he was dry. "Hmm, well I'm just pointing out that you actually enjoy that I can make you hot so easily."

She took her time in the shower. She conditioned her hair and moved on to shave as the conditioner set.

Nico watched for a second and then turned to the mirror. He brushed his hair back and then reached for his razor. He needed to shave and he'd been making due with his electric shaver for far too long. He opened the case and slid the straight razor from its box. He pulled the blade open and then traced it lightly with his thumb. He set it down and pulled his soap from his bag. He lathered up and set to work.

Dani exited the shower and as she dried herself, she watched as he shaved. She'd seen him use the straight razor before and was always slightly mesmerized by it. It was so old fashioned for such a modern man. She found it odd and endearing, but somehow it was just very Nico. She moved to the vanity and leaned against it as he ran the razor over his jaw. She listened to the sound of it scratch over his whiskers. She watched as he dipped the blade into the basin, rinsed it and then carefully went back to stroking it across the skin of his jaw. As usual, she didn't speak to him while he shaved and he didn't really acknowledge her. A shiver ran through her when his eyes met hers for split second. Watching the blade on his skin for some reason hit her in a way that seemed to heat her blood. She felt her skin flush as her nipples pulled tight. She didn't want to admit it, but he looked dangerous right now and that turned her on.

Nico saw her watching him. He saw her skin pink up and he wondered exactly what was going through her thoughts, and that thought set his mind down paths he'd rather not follow; at least not right now. He had to step back from the vanity as the pressure against his lower half was suddenly uncomfortable. He struggled to stop thinking about Dani, but the pulsing heaviness between his legs was not easy to ignore. He took a breath and concentrated on his task and with two more strokes of steel over flesh, he had his face smooth. He lowered the blade, rinsed it and then dried it before closing it and rinsing his face. Then he turned to Dani as he patted his face dry with the towel on his shoulder.

"What's going on in your head?" His eyebrow was up and he watched her face darken a deeper shade of red as she pulled her towel up under her arms tighter. He reached for the towel and tugged. "Suddenly shy?"

She shook her head and bit her lip. How he got to her…why he got to her. "You're so sexy…just watching you…" Her voice was a bit breathy and she let him tug the towel away and then she was naked against his chest. His hands cupped her breasts and pulled at her nipples and she gasped. "Oh god…you drive me crazy."

"You like to watch?" He smiled down at her, his hands still teasing her nipples. "Why is it sexy watching me shave Danielle?"

She shivered; partly from what his hands were doing and partly due to the tone of his voice. He was getting under her skin. She took half a step forward and pressed her forehead to his chest. "I don't know." She inhaled the freshly showered scent of him and struggled not to moan as he tugged on her nipples. "You're so intense and there's something…" She gasped when he bent to drag his teeth along her neck. "God…" Her head fell back.

"Finish your explanation Danielle." His tongue moved over her collarbone and then up under her chin to her ear. "What else?" He traced the sensitive skin behind her ear with his nose while his left hand continued at her breast, but his right slid lower, down over her hip to her the slight curve of her belly.

Her breathing had increased and he splayed his hand flat there and waited with two of his fingers resting just above her pubic bone. The skin under his hand fluttered in anticipation. He looked down at her face and smiled knowingly. "Answer me."

Her mouth had gone dry and she could barely remember what she had been going to say. She licked her lips and nodded as she tried to focus. It came back and his fingers slid a little lower, brushing the curls between her legs. "Please…" She blinked and took a deep breath.

He shook his head.

"Intense…you're intense and seeing you with the razor…" her eyes fluttered shut and then she blinked them opened, "it just makes me think of…" Her eyes settled on his, wide and heavy with meaning, "what you did…what happened. You look dark, almost dangerous. I can't help thinking about those things." She looked at the red mark, at the thin scar that was still on her arm.

A wave of lust rolled over him. It was so hot and so sudden that it shocked him. He bit back a growl as his hand moved into her wet hair and tangled in it at her nape. He pulled her head back and looked down at her. "I want you Danielle."

Dani shivered at the pure sexuality in his voice and she couldn't hold back the moan as she nodded, already reaching for waist of his jeans, which he'd zippered, but not buttoned. She pulled the zipper down just as his mouth found hers in a desperate kiss. She shoved at the denim along his hips.

He didn't wait for more. Dani had the jeans low enough, her hand was on him, stroking him and he moaned into her mouth. He nudged at her legs and she parted her thighs for him, spread them wide even as she reached behind herself with her free hand to help as he lifted her onto the vanity. He pulled his mouth from hers and watched her face. His right hand was still in her hair and he smiled when she instantly wrapped her legs around his hips. He reached down and centered himself and then slowly pushed inside as he watched her face.

Dani's eyes were wide and she made a soft sound as he entered her. It was something between pleasure and pain, but she wouldn't have asked him to stop or change a thing. Her grip on his shoulders tightened and her nails dug in. She gasped and her mouth opened slightly and she arched toward him in encouragement.

"You're so damn sexy." He leaned over her to press kisses to her neck and down her breasts. He pulled back and slid his hips forward again, slow and steady. She hadn't been completely ready for him, but he needed her. He could tell she needed him just as much. "Oh my god Danielle…you feel so good."

"Please…" She begged, her hips moving toward his, asking for more. She needed to feel him inside her. She wanted to feel him hard and deep. "Oh…" Just the thought of him fucking her and she moaned deep in her throat. Her body clenched around him in a desperate play for more. "More."

A wicked smile lifted his lips and he pulled out even slower. He kept his pace agonizingly unhurried, even though it wasn't really what he wanted. He pushed back in and watched where their bodies met. Seeing it was erotic as hell and it was only making teasing her harder. His eyes wandered up her body to her face. She'd shifted and was bracing herself with both hands behind her now. She was trying to move against him, to make him move to her pace, but he wasn't having it. He shook his head. "I don't think so Danielle." He released his hold on her hair and let his hands drag over her breasts. Light touches, and pinches, scratches with his nails and the entire time he rocked in and out at a measured pace. His right hand moved lower and found her clit. It circled and teased and he almost laughed when her head popped up and her eyes popped open.

"Please…yessss…" She rocked against his hand as he touched her. His fingers sent shocks of pleasure up and down her spine and with him inside her at the angle he was at, with the pace he'd set, though slow, had her building toward a climax that was deep and slow, but she knew it was going to hit her hard. "Nico…" she panted his name, her eyes locked on his as his thumb and index finger rolled her clit in time to his thrusting. "There baby…please…" she licked her lips and her toes curled behind his back.

He kept his pace even though it was killing him. The slow, steady in and out coupled with the stroking over her clit as he watched her pant and struggle against him. He smiled. He could deny her. If he stopped right now, she'd fall away, but he needed to cum and more than anything he wanted to see her fly for him. He canted his hips, changed the angle just slightly, but he kept the rhythm the same and he nodded at her with a smile. "You're gonna cum Danielle. You're gonna cum thinking about me holding a blade." He took a breath. "Thinking about how dangerous I can be, and you like it…" He pressed and pulled at her clit, his hips moved a bit faster and his breathing was getting irregular. "You're going to need it soon. I'm waiting."

Dani gasped and felt his last thrust harder, or maybe it was just her imagination. Her mind was swirling, her body was close to flying. She arched toward him. His words set off a chain reaction in her head that sent heat raging through her body and even though she didn't want him to be right, she felt he was. Right now though, his thrusts and the visions in her head from his words meant that she was going to cum. "Yes…god…" She thrust hard up under him and her hands were suddenly on his forearms. Her nails made little crescents in his skin. "Oh my god…"

When she cried out and then her body gripped his cock, he gave up pretense and his hands found her hips. He pulled her rough and hard against him and thrust into her. "Danielle…yes…baby…so good…" He pumped hard into her as she continued to clench around him. Over and over he moved, slamming into her until he finally threw his head back and with a strangled moan, that may or may not have been her name, he came.

He crumbled against her with his forehead on her chest as he caught his breath. He felt her hands in his hair and heard her murmuring to him as her hands petted him and she told him how much she loved him. His arms slid behind her and he pulled her tight against him. He pressed a kiss between her breasts and then another slightly higher. Then finally, he found her lips with his. He kissed her slowly and then pulled back and smiled as he withdrew and found the towel that had fallen from his shoulder to clean them off with.

Dani watched as he pulled his jeans back into place and then helped her down from the vanity. Her legs were shaky and she leaned against him for a minute. "You're quite the workout in the morning." She looked up at him as she brushed a wayward lock of hair from his forehead.

He winked at her and tried not to wince when it made his eye hurt. "That makes you my second workout of the day then."

She saw him wince and frowned. "How far did you make him run today, anyway?" She pulled back to look at the bruises on his ribs and she took a second to scrutinize his side before she lifted her hand to his face to press by his eye, looking for more injuries. Though obviously, he wasn't hurt too badly. "And what happened? Did you fall? Get hit?"

He sighed, took her hands in his and pressed a kiss to each one. "Danielle we didn't run today. We went to my boxing club instead."

Her eyebrows rose and then came together. "Oooh, so you were sparring with Ronnie again?"

"Not exactly, I did spar, but not with Ronnie and my partner is why I have damaged ribs." He glanced in the mirror and pointed to his eye. "And what's turning out to be a nice black eye."

She frowned. "Well, I hope you gave as good as you got then." She gave him a cross look.

He chuckled. "Uh, you might change your mind when you see my sparring partner Dani and before you do, remember what you just said. Also remember, he's fine."

"What did you do Nico?" Dani moved then. She pushed past him and moved into the bedroom. She pulled open her drawers, found panties and slipped them on. Then she pulled on a bra as she started in on lecturing Nico about not using boys for his target practice.

Nico ran a comb through his hair as he listened. He picked up his clothes, carried them into the bedroom and sat on the bed. He pulled a light grey t-shirt on, followed by a dark grey quarter zip lightweight wool sweater over top. He shoved the sleeves partway up his arms and stood.

"Dani." He waited for her to stop lecturing and when she didn't he added a different tone to his voice, "Danielle."

Dani exited the closet with a pair of jeans in her hand and a snug, emerald, long sleeved t-shirt already on. She looked up at the man standing in the middle of their bedroom. She'd heard him the first time, but she'd ignored him because she was worried and slightly angry at him, but the second time he'd said her name something was different. She blinked at him. "Yes?"

He sighed, moved to where she was and put his hands on her shoulders. "Stop, get dressed and come downstairs with me. Ray Jay isn't a boy as far as size goes and he can actually box. He landed some good punches on me, and I wasn't trying to hit him Danielle. He was trying to get fancy, trying to get me to drop my guard and move in. I didn't expect him to come at me at the same time that I jabbed. He took a punch to the jaw and is going to live with a nice bruise for a week and a half, but he's fine." He kissed her forehead. "I wouldn't hurt him, you know that. I promise you something, he learned what not to do in a fight and if you want to blame someone for teaching him how to throw a punch, I believe that lies completely on your mother's shoulders." His right brow quirked upward, "and five minutes ago you would have been happy that I knocked my opponent on his ass."

"He's okay?" She leaned against him, her jeans in one hand while her other hand gripped his hip.

He tilted her head upward, so he could see her eyes. "Yes, trust me he's fine, except for some minor cosmetic damage like mine. He's good in the ring Dani, but if he's going to learn how to fight and defend himself you might expect to see a few more bruises. He wants to go back."

She sighed. She really didn't like the idea, but after everything they'd been through recently she wasn't going to say she was completely against Ray Jay knowing more about taking care of himself. And if Nico could teach him, well, that actually made her feel better about it. She nodded. "Okay."

"Get dressed, so we can eat." He smiled as his stomach growled. "Between the ring and our workout, I have quite an appetite."

"Fine." She stepped back and pulled her jeans on before she headed to the bathroom to tame her hair.

_A little later…_

Dani and Nico sat at the counter drinking coffee and working on the crossword puzzle, which was almost completed. They looked up to see Ray Jay skulk into the kitchen.

Nico couldn't help but snicker because he was trying to keep the right side of his face away from his mother's view.

Dani was up off her stool in seconds and her hand was on his chin to gently turn his face so she could see. "Oh my god Nico, you said cosmetic damage." She turned to glare at the man across the kitchen. "Are you sure that's all this is?" She turned back to her son. "Does it hurt? Can you move your jaw? Why don't you have ice on it? Do you need to go the hospital?" She was opening the freezer as she asked the last two questions.

Ray Jay sighed and shot Nico a desperate look.

Nico shrugged and mouthed, "I tried…"

"Mom, it's sore, but it's fine. I took some ibuprofen. I've had ice on it all morning. I don't need the hospital and it's my fault. I did something stupid while we were sparring and I'm paying for it, besides did you see his eye?" He laughed. "I nailed him good and had him against the ropes then, but I doubt he told you that did he?"

Dani pulled out a bag of frozen peas and handed it to her son before looking at Nico with her eyebrow up. "He had you on the ropes?"

"Once for a few seconds, yes. How do you think I got the sore ribs? He nailed me in the eye with a nice jab, I fell back, but I didn't realize how close I was to the ropes. He pinned me in the corner for a few seconds and just hammered away at my ribs until my vision cleared enough for me to push him back." He nodded to Ray Jay. "Which is a good place to point out that you need to be aware of your surroundings at all times."

Ray Jay smiled as he pulled a pastry from the blue box. "I'll remember next time…or maybe you should?" He snickered and moved to the coffee pot where he poured himself a cup.

Dani listened to the two of them and shook her head. Obviously, they were both fine with what happened and Ray Jay wasn't hurt too badly. She tossed the peas at him. "Humor me and put this on your face please."

"Fine." He held the bag to his face and took a bite of his croissant. "Now, I just need a cover story for the face."

Nico looked up from the puzzle. "No, you need to tell the truth. You were sparring with your boxing partner and you took a hit to the jaw, 'but you should see my partner's eye'." Nico winked at him and picked up his mug.

Dani chuckled. "Boys and their egos."

Nico hooked his arm around her waist as she passed by. "I have no ego about my black eye." He pulled her into his arms and onto his lap. He nodded toward Ray Jay. "Kid's good, with practice he can be better and it's a good workout. I needed to get back in the ring. I haven't been there since I went a few with Ronnie."

Ray Jay perked up. "Ronnie? Really, you were boxing a girl…dude that ain't even right."

Nico looked over at him. "Oh, is that how it is? Well, next week I'll put you in the ring with her and we'll see how you do." He shook his head. "I went easy on you. Ronnie won't."

Ray Jay snorted. "She's a girl…"

"Don't let her hear you say that." He tilted his head so he could see Dani on his lap. "When she wipes the ring with him, just so you know, I tried to warn him."

Dani looked at her son. "She's as tall as you and solid muscle. If you don't think she can kick ass, you're in trouble. She really did a number on Nico's knee."

"Is that why you were limping around?"

Nico frowned. He hadn't realized it had been that obvious. "Yeah, when you box her, know she's more MMA than straight up boxer. She uses her legs and she'll go for the knee." He sipped from his mug. "Her left side is strong. So, watch out for it."

Ray Jay took a bite of the croissant in his hand. He started talking around a mouthful of pastry. "Wewl…"

"Ray Jay." Dani interrupted him, "Finish chewing first please."

He rolled his eyes and made a show of chewing his food, but they realized that hurt his jaw, so he stopped and chewed normally. He swallowed it down with some coffee and then finished. "As I was saying…" He eyed his mother playfully, "As long as mom doesn't get all freaked out if I get a little bump or bruise. You know mom, think of it like football, or wrestling…then I'll see what I can do against her. I do know how to wrestle. Made it to the championship three years running." He paused and frowned. "Keep coming in second, but still better than not making it all."

Dani shook her head. "I'm not promising anything, but you better stay in one piece." She was very serious when she turned in Nico's lap and looked him in the eye. "And I'm holding you to that Mr. Careles. I don't care who you put him in the ring with. A bruise, a bump; fine, but I don't want anything else. Do I make myself clear?"

Nico held up his hands. "Very clear Dr. Santino, crystal clear. I'll bubble wrap him from now on." He bit his lip to keep from laughing at her. Later…he'd deal with her dressing him down later, right now, he'd enjoy the fact that she was doing it so cutely. "You're very cute in mama bear mode, do you know that?"

She growled at him, rolled her eyes and got down from his lap. "I mean it, but I need more coffee right now." She sighed and moved to the pot. She held it up and when he nodded, she filled his cup as well. "I know you're laughing at me, so stop it."

He shook his head and leaned close, so only she could hear. "I'm not laughing, even though I'd like too." He tucked a bit of hair behind her ear. "I love that you're protective of the people you love Danielle, but by now you should know; I am too." He kissed her ear, picked up his mug and nodded at the back door. "The gutter along the garage looked loose. I'm going to take a look."

Dani watched him go, a little confused. She turned to look at Ray Jay. "The gutter along the garage?"

He shrugged. "Beats me, I never look at the gutters." He finished his croissant and pulled a second one from the box. "These things rock." He headed toward the stairs.

Dani stood by the back door and watched as Nico looked up at her garage. She didn't know what he was looking for, because to her the gutters looked fine. She watched as he sipped his coffee and walked around where she wasn't able to see him. Her eyes moved to the yard and the rhododendron that he'd talked about before and then the two bare plants that he and Ray Jay had planted not that long ago. She pressed her head against the glass and smiled as a feeling of, she hated to think it and she was almost afraid to feel it after everything they'd been through recently, but as a feeling of normalcy settled over her.

So she was surprised by the tears that were suddenly in her eyes. She didn't want them there, but they weren't really tears of sadness or of happiness. Maybe, if she had to name them, she'd say loss. She'd lost a lot in the past few weeks. They all had, but then another feeling rushed through her and it warmed her and the tears were there again. These were the tears of a grateful woman. She closed her eyes and thanked god for what she had right then.

When she opened her eyes she saw Nico standing in the yard. His arms were folded over his chest, as his mug steamed slightly in the cool fall air. He was looking at the bare rose bushes and Dani watched him nod and something caught in her throat right then. He turned and looked up at the sun, he smiled and before she could think, another emotion overwhelmed her. This one she struggled to name, or even classify. It had so many aspects, so many strengths and it came from so many places in her heart that even with all the words she had there was no way to express it. Another tear ran down her cheek, and this one she let fall unchecked.

Nico glanced over his shoulder to see Dani watching from the window. He smiled and headed back to the house and for the first time in a very long time he had the thought that he was heading back to a place he called home.

**THE END**

_**NOTE: **_I expect there will be more stories in this series. More Dani and Nico, something about TK, maybe some more Greg…you never know what I'll come up with, but this story had to end.


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